|Friday||Latest Master Tape Theatre|
Howard started the show asking Robin where she wanted to begin this morning. They were thinking about talking about Soupy Sales dying. Howard said that piece of hair in Robin's hair is driving him crazy. Robin had some name for that piece of hair that was something like Strinis. She said she wouldn't even know how to spell that word.
The guys talked about Ivanca Trump getting married over the weekend. Howard said the guy is the publisher of The Observer. Howard said he wanted to make sure he had his facts straight though so he read through the article and read that the guy is 28 and the son of a real estate billionaire, Charles Kushner. Howard read that he's also a principle in the company. Robin said it's a perfect merger. Howard said the only rub is that the guy is Jewish. Robin said that you can always be not Jewish if you are a Jew. Howard said Ivanca can always become un-Jewish if she wanted to.
Howard said his interview with Eminem at K-Rock many years ago was something his daughter never heard. Howard said she wants to hear it so Howard asked Gary to check it to make sure he didn't ask anything weird. Gary said he'd do that and listen to it to make sure he didn't do anything strange there.
Howard asked Gary to do that and cut out anything that would be embarrassing. Robin said they hardly knew anything about him back then. Gary said that they did make the connection about his mother and that was a lot of the interview. Gary said he could have thrown in some strange lines so he will listen to the whole thing. Howard told Gary to change history if he can.
Howard said his kids don't really listen to the show. One day recently he broke into his Andy Rooney impression and his daughter Ashley said that she might actually like his show. He told her that she might like it once in a while but not every day.
Ronnie said he didn't bring Pete there. Pete heard that he was doing something there and he showed up. Ronnie said he was waiting in the lobby of Rick's and he didn't invite him there. Ronnie said that someone sent something in that said he got him drunk and brought him up on stage. He said he didn't have anything to do with that. He said the fans were having a good time with him and he wasn't doing any of what they were saying he was doing.
Ronnie said he and Jared made sure Pete started to sober up before he left for his train. He said they made sure he got a cab so he could get to the train station.
Howard asked Ronnie what's going on with him and why people are throwing him under the bus. Ronnie said that JD has a thing for him and he likes to throw him under the bus. Howard said he read the email he's talking about and he didn't think he was being thrown under the bus. Ronnie said that's not the way he felt last week when he heard about all of this.
Howard said JD's job is to send him stuff every day. He said he gets video clips, email and a bunch of other stuff. He said that Fred would do the same thing if he got the email. Ronnie said that he seems to have an issue with him so that's why he's saying this.
Ronnie said that JD is the one who is always lighting the fire. He said that's why he gets so upset. He said he has no problem with JD but JD seems to have an issue with him.
Howard said that he's going to do a lock down of the email. They have a system that allows many people to read the same email. He's going to review the list and stop this from happening. He said that people are running to other people and he's going to put a stop to it.
Howard said they're riling Ronnie up now and they shouldn't be doing that. Howard said he wants to know who reported this to Ronnie so he can take them off the list. Ronnie said he's not going to tell him. Howard said he's going to take Tim Sabean and a bunch of other people off if he doesn't tell him. Howard said there is a leak and he's going to stop it.
Howard said he's going to take everyone but the core guys there off the list so they can't read what he's working on. Howard said no one in management needs to know what he's working on. He knows that Artie isn't the problem because he doesn't even have a computer. Robin never goes in either.
Howard figured it might be Scott the Engineer that told Ronnie. Fred hinted at that by playing an audio clip of Scott. Ronnie swore it wasn't Scott. Then Fred played a Sal clip. Howard said it may have been Sal. Ronnie said it wasn't Scott. He didn't say anything about Sal.
Howard asked Ronnie about Pete showing up at Rick's and what he did there. Ronnie said that Pete knew he was going to be there and he just showed up. He said he didn't ask him to come down and he wasn't getting the guy drunk. Howard said Ronnie is all about meeting girls and guys. That led to Fred playing the ''Scoresman'' audio clip where Ronnie talks about how he's all about meeting girls and meeting guys and anyone who doesn't like it can go fuck themselves.
Howard said Ronnie is hanging out at the strip clubs and people are going to show up. Ronnie said he can't keep Pete from going there. Howard said Ronnie should just tell him to have a good time and leave it at that. Howard told Ronnie he has to be careful because the guy is an intern, even though he's 34 years old. Howard said it's so silly because the guy is 34 and he should know what to do. He said that it's a tough call but maybe Ronnie shouldn't be hanging out with interns.
Ronnie said the guy is 34 years old and he would tell any of the younger interns to get out but this guy is 34 and he's not a kid. He said he can't just leave him in the hallway. Howard said you have to be careful with interns. Howard said a guy got fired from ESPN for doing stuff with interns. Ronnie said that Pete is a guy though.
Ronnie said Pete looked like he was going to explode with the first lap dance he got. He said he had a beautiful blonde chick there and he looked like he was going to explode.
Ronnie asked JD if he's jealous of him or something. Howard said he has to lock down this email list because of this. He said it's causing problems with JD and Ronnie. He said he's not even sure who he can trust on there anymore. Gary said they have to figure out who the leak is. JD said he thinks he knows and he thinks that it's Jared. Howard said Jared is off the list then. Howard said Ronnie is giving him body language and it looks like it could be him.
Ronnie asked JD why it's Jared all of a sudden. Ronnie said he's buddy, buddy with everyone there and it's not just Jared. JD said that he and Jared are very close and he brings Jared a black and white cookie when they come on Wednesdays. Ronnie said he just does the guy a favor. He said he used to do that for Gary too.
Robin said Ronnie looks like a waiter on Wednesdays. She said he's always bringing food to people around that place. Howard said Ronnie has to leave the compound so he's not there doing security. Ronnie said it's just for a short time so it's not like he's gone that long. Howard told him he wants him there and not delivering cookies.
Howard asked JD if he still doesn't want Ronnie's show on the air. JD said yes to that. Howard said he would put it back on the air if he gave him the okay.
Howard said Ronnie is always complaining that Jason is throwing him under the bus too. Ronnie said they both do that. Ronnie said he was being accused of getting Pete drunk at Rick's and that wasn't his fault even though he did get him free drinks.
Gary said that Laura just sent him a note saying that Jared doesn't have access to the notes. Tim Sabean does so Howard told Gary to get Tim Sabean off the list. Howard said that the list is for the guys who write for the show. He said that Scott DePace should be off too. Scott said he doesn't know how to prepare for the show. Howard told Scott to just point the camera at whatever is going on. Scott said they won't be prepared with pictures and stuff if they don't have access to that email list.
Howard said Steve Langford should be able to find out who the leak is. Howard said he has to find that leak or he's going to be taking everyone off of that list.
Howard said it seems that Ronnie's loyalty is with the rat and not with him. Ronnie said that he's more loyal to Howard. Gary said that they got Tim off the list already. Artie said that their program director is now out of the loop.
Gary asked Ronnie if he was saying that it wasn't Jared or Tim. Ronnie said that it wasn't Tim. He didn't say it wasn't Jared at first but then said it wasn't Jared. Howard said he gets it and he sees that he is loyal to him.
Howard said that Ronnie loves rats. Ronnie said he's not a rat, JD is a rat. JD said he's not a rat because he exposed people out in the open.
Ronnie said he and JD got friendly again last week and now he's being thrown under the bus again. JD said Ronnie was bitching about his show again the other day. He said he asked him why he canceled it. Ronnie said this situation is serious between them and it's a serious dislike.
Howard told Ronnie he should bring JD some black and white cookies. Ronnie said he gave JD Artie's pancakes while Artie was out sick. Ronnie said that he's gotten them before when Artie was out so he gave him to him again. Artie got a laugh out of that.
Howard said all JD did was forward him an email that a listener sent about seeing Pete at Rick's. He said no one thought he was going to get in trouble over that. Ronnie said JD loves to get him in trouble though. He said that he could have gotten in trouble with H.R. over that. Ronnie said he had to tell Tracy what was going on when he found out about that because he wanted her to know his side of the story. He felt like he was going to get into some shit when he really didn't do anything wrong. Artie said it would have been great if it showed up in the NY Post with a picture of Ronnie and Pete hanging out.
Howard said Ronnie can't be held responsible for Pete showing up at Rick's. He said maybe he could have told Pete to leave though. Ronnie said he'll know better for the next time. Howard said if Pete was a girl then there might be trouble. Howard said he's not sure what the rules are. Ronnie said if it was a girl then it would be trouble.
Ronnie said he didn't serve Pete drinks. He said that he could be in the other part of the club buying his own drinks. JD said it was more interesting that he was at Rick's and not that he was hanging out with Ronnie. Howard said Ronnie owes JD an apology. Ronnie wasn't going to apologize and he said that JD has some kind of vendetta against him. JD said he doesn't have anything against Ronnie. Ronnie said he just won't admit it.
Howard said he had a guy on the phone saying that the Howard TV special with Ronnie at Tootsie's was like porno.
Howard had Jared on the phone and he was saying that he's going to get into trouble for lying about Pete being there at Rick's. He said he had nothing to do with the leak either. Jared said he said that some people weren't there at Rick's. He said he said that Tim wasn't there either. Tim stopped by when he was on his way back from someone's birthday party. Howard said that Rick's is like crack to these guys.
Howard said it does seem weird. Tim came in and said he wanted to clear this up. Tim said Tracy came to him on Friday and let him know that Pete was there. He said Tracy wanted to make sure he knew because she controls the interns. Tim asked Howard to put him back on the list and told him that Jared wasn't the rat either.
Howard asked Tim how JD can be free to write to him when he has a rat in there. Howard said he might have to start another group of guys. Howard said he had no idea what Tim was saying.
Tim told Howard again what he was saying about Tracy letting him know about Pete being at Rick's. He said they're just keeping an eye on people there to make sure there are no issues. He said he did call Ronnie to ask him what was going on there.
Ronnie asked Tim why he can't get his show back. Tim said that JD was in charge. Ronnie said that's not right. He said Tim told him that people are calling in asking for his show to come back. Tim said that's true but JD was empowered and he had the power to stop that show. Howard said Tim didn't even hear that show.
Howard said no one there ever heard the show. Ronnie said Tim heard it. Howard said no one heard it but JD and JD said it was the ''most boringest ever'' and he gave him the power to cancel the show.
Howard said Ronnie's show made it into Craig's Radio Hall of Fame. He showed him that and read what it said about his show winning the Most Boringest Show Ever award. Artie told him that he beat out Rambling with Gambling for that award.
John Boy called in and said he saw the Howard TV Rick's special and there were three hot strippers all over Ronnie. He was squeezing their asses in the scene and telling them exactly what to do. John Boy asked Ronnie if he fucked any of them after that. Ronnie jokingly said he did but then said that doesn't go on there. He said that things are looser down in Miami than they are in New York but that kind of stuff doesn't go on.
Howard said Ronnie has worked his way into that Rick's so the girls all think that he's something big there. Ronnie said the girls love the Mambo cologne he wears too. He said they really love it.
Howard said that everyone can check out that Ronnie special on Howard TV. Howard said the girls that were dancing with Ronnie were really hot. Artie said they looked like Playboy models. Ronnie said that they really were hot and he knew each of the girl's names. Howard said he wants to go down there. Artie said he might have to go down there too. Ronnie said he'll be back down there for the Super Bowl. He said those are the real girls they have there every night. He said they weren't just special girls that came in for that show.
Howard said the girls in that video were like super models and they were all naked. Ronnie said they have a bunch of different ethnicities there and they have many different types to cater to different types of guys. He said that they have chubbier chicks for the guys who want that and girls with big butts who like that. He said there were another 10 girls there that night and they can get all nude there.
Ronnie said they're all nude from 11 in the morning until 6 in the morning. He said that's only good in certain counties. Howard seemed surprised by that. He said that they're even nude when they're giving lap dances. Howard said Ronnie must have gotten his finger wet. Artie said they should move the show down there.
Ronnie said the building was supposed to be a Costco so it's gigantic. He said the valet parking is in a spot where you actually drive right into the building.
Ronnie told the guys about the chicks who were in the video and said that one of them has 3 kids. Howard sounded shocked by that. Ronnie said that Lawrence Taylor goes down there for dinner every night. He said the place is great.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked Ronnie if he would still be involved in that place if he didn't get any plugs on the show. Howard said it's okay that he gets the plugs and Ronnie knows that he's getting all of that from being a part of the show.
Howard said Ronnie is on Howard TV from Tootsies and JD can keep sending him stuff about him if he gets it in the email. Howard said Ronnie was wrong for blaming JD about it. Ronnie said he's asking JD for his radio show back but he refuses to do it. He said he'll hold that over him.
JD said he has said a lot of mean things about him so he can't just give him his show back. He said he felt his show was out of place. Ronnie asked why he wants the Geektime show to go on. JD said that's because it's discussions about pop culture and things like that. He said he didn't think that Ronnie's show fit on the channels.
Howard asked JD if Ronnie could do something to change the show to get it back on. JD said he didn't find it that interesting and it wasn't entertaining to him. He said they were talking about leasing cars and stuff. Ronnie said that some fans did like it and Tim got a good response from some fans. JD said he didn't see a big outcry when they canceled the show. He said he's seen more positive stuff about him canceling it. He said he reads SternFanNetwork about that stuff.
Howard asked JD if the show is still canceled. JD said yes to that. Ronnie didn't have anything to say about that. JD said there is nothing at this moment that he can do to get the show back. JD said if they start talking about buying and leasing cars more on Howard's show then maybe he'll bring it back.
Howard asked if they could get the show back if Ronnie reveals who the rat was. Ronnie said he won't do that. He said he's not like that and he's not going to break down over that. He said he's pretty sure that JD would break like that because that's the kind of guy JD is. Ronnie said he was done after that. Howard thanked him for coming in and let him go.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he wanted to defend Ronnie. He said that he liked his show. Howard said JD thought it was the ''most boringest ever'' though. The caller said he liked it.
Pete said that he told Ronnie he was going to go down to hang out and Ronnie told him it was fine. Howard said that's fine and it's kind of funny that the details are coming out this way. Howard said Ronnie only had Pete down there and not all of the male interns. He said he sees what's going on there. Howard said Pete is like Ronnie's favorite so that's why he had him down there. Artie said this is kind of like the Letterman thing. Howard added ''yeah, without the sex.'' Artie said ''Well, I dunno...''
Howard said it's kind of dicey to do something like this. He said none of the other interns were invited down. Howard said Ronnie is always involved with the interns in some way. He's had female interns to his summer picnic too.
Howard asked Pete if he blew a load in his pants. Pete said he did and he did that a few times. Howard asked if he had stains in his jeans. Pete said he double detergent cleaned them. He said that he was walking around dripping wet. Pete said it was less obvious during the night than it would be during the day. He said that the girls must know that they do stuff like that.
Howard asked if he was moaning and stuff. Pete said he was getting into it. He said that the girls must know when guys do that kind of thing. Robin asked if he had to go and clean up. Pete said he just kept going. He said it was less messy because he did clean up at the end of the night. Howard asked how many loads he had. Pete wasn't sure but he said it was ''a lot.'' Howard said he really is backed up. He said that's not an easy thing to do. Howard said he's glad Ronnie had him over to the club.
Howard said he blew a load one time at the strip club. He said that Beth was getting a dance from a girl and he blew a load because it was so hot. Howard said Pete's pants must have looked like it had a candle spilled on it.
Artie asked if everyone there can say that they blew a load in their pants at a strip club. Fred said he never has. He didn't even blow one the time that Gay Rich was rubbing his back. Artie said he's never blown 18 loads like Mr. Wonderful there but he has done it.
Howard asked Pete how late he was there. He said he was there until about 1:30-ish. Pete said he didn't take his meds that day because he knew he'd be drinking. He said he takes himself off of that so he can drink.
Howard asked Pete if he's back on the meds today. Pete said he is but he's still screwed up in his own way. Howard read that there were people asking Pete for his autograph there. Pete said there were and it was kind of strange.
Howard asked Pete about Ronnie getting him a cab. Pete said that hey were very cool about helping him out with that. He said that he did have a few drinks. Howard said he's not sure what to think about that whole thing with Ronnie hanging out with the interns.
The guys talked about Pete blowing loads in his pants and joking about how he could have gotten one of the girls pregnant. Howard said he guarantees Pete's mom had to wash the stains out of his pants. Howard had Pete come back in to talk about that. Pete said he knows how to wash his own pants so he did that on his own. Pete said he went to school up in Vermont for a while so he was out on his own. Pete said that was part of his 10 year program. Robin got a laugh out of that.
Howard asked Pete if his mom asked why he was doing his own laundry that night. He said she probably did but he didn't fill her in on the details. Artie said his mom must love it when Pete hangs out with Ronnie because she doesn't have to do his laundry the next day.
Howard said Rosie O'Donnell will be stopping by today. He said he got an email from her recently and she's going through that whole thing with her wife. He said she doesn't want to discuss it on the air because she can't. Howard said he had to keep quiet about his divorce too while they were going through things so he understands that. Howard said Rosie will be avoiding the subject today. He said he can understand that.
Howard said they'll see what they can talk about today. Howard said he think that she'll be good on radio there at SIRIUS XM when she starts. Howard said she may want to go to Ricks with them now. Howard said they won't have to worry about her dropping loads in her pants. They had to go to break a short time later.
Howard came back and sang along with the song for a short time. He put some echo on his voice and sang a bit. Howard asked Fred about the strange sound that the guitar made. Fred said it was just a way of playing it and it wasn't a special guitar or anything. Fred said he thinks that it was John Lennon playing guitar in that part of the song. Howard said he figured it was George Harrison. Fred said he was pretty sure it was John. Fred said that they used to trade off leads in Abbey Road. Fred said that he thinks he knows guitar pretty well but he knows Jimmy Kimmel won't like that because he thinks he's a know-it-all. He said that's too bad for Jimmy.
Fred's cold was pretty much gone so Howard pointed that out. Fred said he went last year on the same date so it's something he gets every year at this time.
Howard said he wanted to talk about Soupy Sales but he was afraid that Rosie O'Donnell would show up. Artie said she's actually there already. Howard said he's got a bunch of other stuff to talk about too. He said he has to play Scott the Engineer audio from Las Vegas. He said he has to talk to Robin about staying out with Ross Zapin's wife until 5 in the morning. She was also eating pizza. Robin said she did that but she needed something to soak up the booze. Robin said she knew that Gary was going to find out and it would come up on Monday morning. Howard said she must have eaten egg if she ate pizza. Robin said she wasn't sure about that but it is possible.
Rosie said she read Artie's book and she got all worried about him when he was out for a week. She said that her mother died at 39 and she left her show 3 weeks after she turned 40. She said she couldn't believe that she was living past her mother. She said that she has the same issues as Artie does. She said that she's 47 now and every day seems like an extended play on a video game.
Rosie told Howard that she read a book about motherless daughters and they say that most people like that think that their lives are going to end around the same time and when you pass that date it's something that you can't understand. She said that you were never parented past that age so it's very weird to live that much longer than your parent.
Rosie said that when her mom died she didn't have a therapist to go to or anything. She said that she was just given valium. Rosie said that her mother was sick for 5 months before she died. She said she went home and there were aunts and uncles that showed up and they were all sat down and told that her mother had passed away. She didn't know what that meant though. Rosie said she was only 10 at the time.
Rosie said she locked herself in her bedroom for a day and her aunt Josie had to come in through the window to get her out of there. She said she went to a store to buy a radio because that's what she wanted at the time. Rosie said she got that radio and no one ever talked to her about what happened.
Rosie said that her mother died of breast cancer and she didn't find out until 1997. She said she thought she had hepatitis and died from that. Rosie said they hid the cancer from her because they thought it would be too scary for her.
Rosie said she and her sister went to the wake but they weren't allowed to go to the funeral. Rosie said she didn't know what to expect at the wake. She said that her sister asked why mommy was sleeping and all of the adults started to cry again. She said that the next day was the funeral and everyone that came brought her a gift because it was her birthday. She said it was a very confusing time for her.
Howard asked Rosie if she remembers her mom. She said she actually does. She only has about 3 pictures of her but no film. She said that they didn't have the money to buy a movie camera. Howard said his dad had some films like that. He said it's kind of sad that she didn't have that.
Rosie said she takes video of her kids a lot. She said that her kids think that she's papparazzi because she's filming them so much. She said she's got her voice in the videos but she's not always on camera.
Rosie said she just recently saw her father after losing touch with him for like 17 years. She said that she just saw him for the first time about 2 years ago. Rosie said that there were other issues with her father and various abuse issues she has to discuss with him. Rosie said that her father moved to Florida 17 years ago and that's when she stopped communicating with him. She said that she would get emails from him but he's never come to see her in any shows she's done. She said that he may have suffered a lot when he was a child.
Rosie said that her grandfather was bad with kids and he was kicked out of Ireland and came to the United States. She said that her father was molested as a child and he was one of 9 children. All of them are in various stages of addiction. She said that one of them had electro shock therapy and died from that.
Rosie said that her aunt, that died, used to come to her on lithium. She said that she watched that going on and knew that she had tried to take her life on more than one occasion. Rosie said that they never got the explanation about what had gone on. She said that she did know that she died from the electro shock therapy though.
Rosie said she asked her father what had gone on and found out that his mother would ask one kid to take a nap and the grandfather would do stuff to them. Rosie said her father is doing what he can to get through that stuff and she has forgiven him for the way he treated her. She said that him being in her life now wouldn't help her out at all and she would never allow him to be with her kids.
Rosie said that one in three kids are molested and that's just from the kids who report it. Rosie said that she would be molested and she'd tell her mom what was going on but her mom called her a liar. She said that she had a tree cut down to make sure no one was coming in through the window but it was still happening. Rosie said she had a lot of urinary tract infections and she had to use sulfur to treat that. Rosie said the doctor thought she was touching herself but it wasn't her touching herself that caused the infections. Rosie said she didn't want to be more descriptive than that because it's tough on her family.
Rosie said that her siblings may not be happy with her talking about this. She said there are one or two that don't like it. She said that there are two camps in the family and she's part of one and a couple are part of another who don't want to hear this stuff. She said that she tries to communicate with the rest of them but it's tough on them all. She said that when one is famous it makes it even harder.
Howard asked Rosie if she ever wonders what made her father stop. She said she knows that a lot of people can relate to this and this is the most she's spoken out about it in public. She said that she has spoken to women one on one before.
Howard asked why it was on her mind. Rosie said that she was thinking about Artie today and that's why it was on her mind today. She said that she suffers from depression so she's on meds for that. She said she went on that after the whole Columbine thing happened. She said it was horrible to think about that going on. Rosie said she thought that her TV show could help her get through all of that stuff and help form some kind of union to help the kids and parents get through that stuff.
Rosie said that one time she called Oprah Winfrey and told her that they could change the world together and it was a very bad judgment call. Howard said Rosie's show was very popular so she could have influenced people like that. Rosie said she thinks that she terrified Oprah with the phone call. She said that might be why they were never able to work together.
Rosie said that she called Oprah in April of the year that the Columbine thing happened. She said that she didn't sleep at night around then because she was so depressed. She said that she deleted Oprah's phone number after the call and apologized to her for doing that to her. Rosie said she apologized to her about the call and Oprah just told her it was okay and that it was good to see her.
Rosie said she didn't just call Oprah and tell her that it was Rosie and she wanted to talk to her, she just kind of vomited on her with all of this stuff.
Howard said he thinks that Rosie and Oprah are very different people. She said that Rosie has the ability to just walk away from stuff and say she's had enough when Oprah has this hunger to keep getting more and more.
Rosie said her plan all along was to retire at 40. She said that she wanted to have all of her kids by that age and she wanted to retire.
Howard asked Rosie if she's careful that she doesn't let her kids into her sadness or if she tells them everything. Rosie said she tells them everything. Robin told Rosie that Howard's mother lost her mother very young and Howard hears all of those stories all his life. Howard said that has made him very sad. He said that what he's hearing today is making him very upset too. He said when you take in your mother's sadness, it makes it very tough.
Rosie said that she has this big room in her house where the kids can spend time with her, happily. Rosie said that her son is 14 years old and when they complain to her she tells them that when she was their age her mother was dead and they'll come back with a line joking around about it. She said it's always humorous and they can talk about anything with her. Howard said that sounds like a good thing then.
Rosie said that she loves Joanie Mitchell and she thinks that she went through the same kind of pain that she did. She said that her 5 year old would ask her why she was only listening to sad songs like that. Rosie said that she was listening to just Joanie Mitchell and Eminem for a while there and her kids would want to listen to more happy songs.
Howard said his mother had a very sad life and he didn't think he was worthy to express his own feelings. He said he thinks that his mother loves him the most but Rosie said that it's usually the first born that has that connection.
Howard said it was his job to make his mother feel better. She didn't go to therapy. Rosie said she's been going to therapy all her life and she knows that Howard is going like 4 times a week. Rosie said she's trying to learn how to manage all of this anger. Robin said she has to learn to release it. Rosie said she's reading Robin's book now and she's going through the whole history of the Stern Show lately. She said she hopes she can get through it all and just live her life. Robin said that the greatest gift she can give to her kids is to show them that she's working through something like that.
Howard asked Rosie about her weight. Rosie said she stops moving when she gets sad or depressed so she gains weight. She said that it's not even about the amount of food she eats. Rosie said that she's very active right now so she's up and about and the weight comes off. She said that it's not coming off to get down to a size 10 but she is losing some. She said she's about 212 pounds and the thinnest she ever was is 175. She said that was even too thin for her.
Rosie said that her kids didn't know it was her in the Flintstones movie because he had never seen her that thin. She said that in ''Exit to Eden'' she was like 170 and that was way too thin for her.
Howard said he heard that Rosie once said that she would rub them under her arm pit to bond with them. She said that it wasn't her arm pit. Rosie said that they recommend that when you adopt that you keep the kids around you so they can bond to the smell. She said that for a week or so she wouldn't take a shower. She said that she wasn't really smelly but she was trying to get the kids to bond to her.
Howard said that he and Rosie bonded over the weekend and she explained clearly to him about why she can't talk about that. Howard said he didn't want to screw her up about that. Rosie thanked him for that.
Rosie talked about how her marriage was annulled after they got married in San Francisco. She said that they didn't annul the second round of gay marriages out there. Rosie said that she and Kelli are working through the stuff they have and both of them are continuing to parent the kids. She said they never expected to be in this situation.
Rosie told Artie that he had better stop being sick because that George Takei is very funny. She said that he was one of the gay guys whose marriage was grandfathered in.
Howard told Rosie that they were talking about bringing her to Rick's Cabaret with them. She asked if that's where the Sybian is. Artie said that's actually there. Rosie thought that she met the inventor of the Sybian there but it turned out it was Tim Sabean, their program director.
Howard said he went a little wild when he got single and he's wondering if Rosie is going to do that. She said she can't even imagine doing that. She has four kids that she has to deal with. She doesn't even think about dating. Howard said it has to have been a while for her. She said that's not true and sex wasn't one of them. Howard said that sounds perfect to him. Howard said if she's not married after a while then she'll want to go out and have a powerful relationship. Howard said he can see her with someone like
Howard asked Rosie about the gay rumors about Oprah Winfrey. Rosie said that it sure appears that there's something up with Oprah and her best friend Gayle. She said that they do appear to be a couple and they even wear rings but they have never said that they're gay. Rosie said that maybe Oprah has something there, maybe not.
Howard said that Rosie should be going out and having some fun. He said she should date. Rosie said she has never really tried to date. She said that lesbians just meet and go out. She said they don't really date.
Howard said Rosie should take Portia Derossi from Ellen Degeneres. Rosie said she has a problem with dating someone famous. She said that it would be very disruptive to her family life. She said that she doesn't want her kids to go through that.
Rosie said she met Natasha Leone recently and she was very enamored with this girl. She said that she has something more than a crush on her but it will never be sexual. She said that she's 17 years older than her and she would never have sex with someone that young. She said that she's 47 and she can't have a young girl like that. Rosie said that she needs an older woman who enjoys kids and just wants to go out on the boat.
Rosie said she and Kelli have a very strong connection. She said they're trying to work things out. Howard said she's hot. Rosie said Kelly gets her and sometimes she gets her too much.
Rosie told Howard that they live in small house on Long Island and they're trying to work through things so they can have a situation that works for everyone. She said that they both have apartments in the city too so it's all okay. She said she thinks that they need a break though. Howard said he thinks she needs romantic heat in her life. Artie said he may have the woman for her. He said that his maid is a 48 year old woman who isn't famous and she may be willing to swing.
Howard said that Rosie's wife doesn't play up the fame thing so that's good for the family. Rosie said that Kelli is very level headed and intelligent. She said that she loves her very much. Howard said he thinks that she's going to be dating soon. Rosie said that you never know.
Rosie said that she wants to meet Artie's mother and sister and talk to them about what it's like to love him. Artie said he's not sure they know.
Howard read that Rosie did some material about The View in her act in August. She called Elisabeth Hasselbeck ''Elisabeth Half-a-brain'' in her act. She said that she tried to be friendly with her on the show but it was very tough. She said that she will talk about things like that on her radio show too. Rosie said that she had some wild Barbara Walters stories too. She had a whole thing where they had to sing a song to Michael Bloomberg with lyrics to a song parody that Barbara had written.
Howard asked Rosie about what Barbara said about her. Barbara thought that Rosie had thought of her as a mother. Rosie said that's not really true but she does have mother issues with any woman older than her. She said that she thought she'd have a lot to connect to Barbara over but it didn't turn out that way. She said that Barbara was kind of non-supportive in the Donald Trump thing so that was kind of shocking.
Howard asked Rosie about the whole Letterman situation. Rosie said that she wasn't surprised by that at all. She said that it was an abuse of power but he shouldn't be brought down over it. She said that she got there this morning and asked Gary if Howard had a Letterman like fuck palace. Gary told her that the green rooms are there for when Artie gets sleepy and he actually sleeps in there. Rosie said that Letterman is almost socially autistic so it was kind of a shock that he was doing this.
Howard said that he saw Dick Cheney talking about how President Obama isn't being a man for pulling out the troops in Iraq. Meanwhile Cheney was one of the people who sent those guys over to Iraq to fight in that war. Howard also pointed out that Cheney never fought in any war. Rosie said she thinks that Cheney, Bush and Rumsfeld will eventually be tried as war criminals. She said that Bush is reprehensible to her. She said that it's really sad what's gone on with them.
Howard asked when Rosie's show is starting. She said that it starts in one week. She said she will be on from 10 to 12. Howard asked her about having a radio studio at her house and Robin said it sounds like Jackie the Joke man. That led to Rosie saying that she had a huge crush on Jackie's wife Nancy. Artie said that Jackie from behind with the long hair would look like a chick. Rosie said that she used to listen to Jackie on the show and she had a whole flashback to her 20s doing stand-up with him.
Howard asked Rosie what she's going to do with guests. Rosie said she will have guests come to her house or call in. She said that it won't be heavily celebrity driven though. She said it's like Howard's show in that way. She said that the kids might come in and things like that.
Rosie said that they're trying to do a format similar to what Howard does but with her spin on things. She said that they won't be doing sexual stuff like Howard does either. She said that they won't have a Sybian in the house or anything like that.
Robin asked Rosie if she has ever had an attraction to a guest on her show. She said that she was attracted to Petra Nemkova (Actually Peta Wilson) and her staff thought she was hitting on her. Rosie said she did get her phone number but she has no ability to follow through. Rosie said that she also had Angelina Jolie on her show one time and they kind of had a flirtation going on. She said she spoke to Angelina on the phone 2 or 3 times but that was it. Rosie said that they were going to have dinner but the plan never came through.
Howard asked Rosie about the Angelina thing and Rosie aid that she still has dreams about her but they're not sexual dreams. She said that they're very odd dreams where she shows up with a tiger asking for a ride in her car.
Howard asked Rosie if she would be willing to have Donald Trump on her show in her house. She said that he's not part of her universe. She said she wouldn't have him over and she wouldn't want to be around him. She said that she would love to have someone like Mike Tyson come on her show though. Rosie said it has to be something that interests her and Trump doesn't interest her at all.
Rosie said Trump has been bankrupt a bunch of times and he got his money from his father so she's not a fan of his. She said that he treats women poorly and doing what he did to her was just showing the way he thinks about other women.
Robin asked if she would have Amy Fisher on her show. She said she would do that but she wouldn't have Joey Buttafuoco on. She also said she wouldn't have on Jon and Kate or any of their 8. She said that she won't have the Octomom on either because she feels that she's mentally ill.
Howard said he saw a video of Octomom being interviewed by a guy and standing there getting attention while she was trying to get into her house saying she didn't want to be interviewed. He said it was obvious that she loved the attention even though she said she didn't want it.
Rosie said there is something very serious going on with the mother and daughter in that Octomom family. She said that she would not go there with that interview. Rosie said there are plenty of other people she could interview.
Rosie said he would speak to Mackenzie Phillips. She said that she would not have Roman Polanski on her show. She said that he once asked her to do a movie even after she did a ton of material about him bashing him. She said that he still wanted her in a movie even after she had his people send him her act again. Rosie said that she has been staggered by people who defend Roman Polanski. She said that she can't believe it when she sees people saying that it wasn't ''rape, rape.'' Howard said he tried to watch The View that day that Whoopi said that and he had no idea what she was trying to say. Rosie said it was startling to her when she saw that reaction.
Rosie told Howard that him saying that he thought she'd be good on satellite radio is what made her take the job there. Howard said that he thinks she really will do well there. He gave her some plugs for her show that will be on the Stars channel there (SIRIUS 102 and XM 155). She said that she started to listen to the channel there and she didn't think that it was that great of a channel. She said she will do it there and she will enjoy it. She said that she's exclusive to SIRIUS too.
Howard heard that Rosie likes to hang upside down every day. Rosie said that she does that to help with her serotonin levels. She said that it's a way of keeping her levels up. She told Artie he should try it too. Rosie said there's a table you can use that hangs you upside down and it's not that scary. Artie said he has never tried yoga before but he was held upside down by a bookie one time and that made him more depressed.
Artie said that he got bumped at a comedy club one time. He said the club owner told him the news and he watched her do her act. The Woody Allen scandal had just broken and she did about 30 minutes bashing the guy and he sat there laughing his ass off. Artie said she was great that night and he thought it was very ballsy for her to do that. Artie said he went up and bombed after that.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked if there's a scheduling conflict there between Howard's show and Rosie's show. Howard said you can catch her show and catch his show later on in the day. He said that's what he likes about it. Rosie said they're going to replay her show during the day just like Howard's show so they can catch her show later in the day too.
The caller also mentioned how great Rosie has been on Curb Your Enthusiasm. Rosie said that the show is great and she loves doing it. Rosie said that they improv the show and she's had a lot of fun doing that. She said that she trusts Larry David and she thinks that he's a comedic genius.
Robin mentioned that comedian Ant had sex on one of the cruises that Rosie used to do. Rosie said she wasn't too happy with Ant when she found out about that. Artie said he doesn't call him ''that comedian Ant'' he calls him ''that gay guy Ant.'' Rosie said that's what she calls him too. She said that the cruise wasn't meant for that, it was a family cruise.
A caller asked Rosie if she has ever seen Madonna nude. Rosie said she has and she has told her to put a top on when she saw her topless at a party one time.
Howard talked to Rosie about masturbating so they talked about the vibrators that she and Robin have used. She uses the magic wand and said that her son found it under her bed one time and asked her what it was. She told the kid that it was a fake microphone that she uses.
Howard wrapped up with Rosie and gave her some plugs. Rosie said that she would like to be on his channels. Howard said he wants her there. Rosie said they told her it was about demographics but Howard said that's bullshit and they should have her on there. He said he tried to talk to Scott Greenstein about that. Howard asked Rosie if she will stick with this. She said she will because she has a two year commitment. She said she can stay home to do it so she should be all set. Rosie said she is committed to do it for two solid years. Howard told her she'll have fun doing it. Rosie said it seems easy but it's actually very hard.
Rosie said that they've done some test shows and they said that they could air them but she thinks that they're horrible so she doesn't want that to happen. Howard said that's good, she's already wanting her show to be better. Howard had to wrap up and go to break a short time later.
Howard came back and talked about Soupy Sales passing away. He said he was sad over that. He said he has said before that he was his hero growing up. Howard said he was happy to see that in some articles. Howard said he and Soupy had some very weird years together though.
Howard said when he was a little kid he remembers Soupy having a house, kind of like Pee Wee Herman's house later on. Howard said that was kind of a rip off of Soupy's show. Howard said Soupy had puppet characters on his show and one was just a paw. The character was White Fang and it would just make weird noises kind of like a dog. Howard said it was a kid's show and like no other kid's show that he had ever seen. Howard said the guy lived in this imaginary world and he was captivated by it. Howard said the guys in the background would laugh and yell out to him while he was doing it. Howard said there was nothing like it on TV.
Howard said Soupy would sometimes have some very adult discussions going on. Howard said it was irreverent and like nothing else. Howard said it started him thinking back then. Howard said he would pretend to be Soupy and tape record himself doing that. Howard said Soupy got so big he had people like Frank Sinatra come on the show to get hit in the face with a pie. Howard said he was happy for Soupy when he'd have a guy like that on the show.
Howard said Soupy wrote a song about a mouse and he got asked to be on Ed Sullivan's show and was great to see because he saw that Soupy was getting some notice. Howard said Soupy came up with a character by the name of Filo Kvetch and he loved seeing that he was using a Yiddish word like that. Howard said these days you watch the show and it's not that great but it was great for kids back then.
Howard said he loved Soupy growing up and then when he did grow up and got a job at WNBC he got to meet Soupy. Howard said when he was at NBC it was the lowest point of his life. He said that Detroit was horrible too but everything was a struggle around that time in his career. Howard said he had enough already by that point. Howard said that most people know the NBC story if they're fans of the show.
Howard said they brought Soupy Sales in to do mid mornings at NBC. He said he was out of his mind at the time so he did some things to Soupy that he regrets. He said he thought he was normal back then but he had to be insane. Howard said therapy has helped him realize that. He said he was resentful that Soupy was hired there after he was hired at NBC. Howard said he hated Imus and he hated playing the shit music and the hell he had been put through there. Howard said NBC didn't recognize him and didn't give him any credit. Howard said he hated it and everyone.
Howard said Soupy marched in at NBC with his radio show and John Hayes had hired him. Howard said Hayes was sucking Soupy's asshole like you wouldn't believe. Howard said he would give Soupy anything he wanted. Howard said he'd like to say that Soupy was an innocent but he wasn't. He said that he treated his people kind of shitty but he never did anything to him directly. Howard said Soupy would do some things like using his sponsors to bring him lunch every day.
Robin said they were also giving Soupy anything he wanted when Howard had to fight for everything. Howard said that wasn't Soupy's doing though. He said that was all NBC. Howard said he did a lot of shitty things to soupy but not at first. Robin said he was nice to Soupy at first but then he was set off by some things and he fought back. Howard said it all made him crazy back then.
Howard had a clip from 1985 where Soupy commented negatively about him for the first time. In the clip a caller told Soupy he was listening to Howard Stern and wanted to know how he felt about him making comments about him. Soupy explained why he had disagreements with people there and how he was just doing what he felt was best for his own show. Soupy was rambling about nothing in the clip and wouldn't say what he really thought. He said that he didn't really need that aggravation though. Soupy said he did Howard's show down in Washington DC and told everyone there how great his show was. Soupy said they asked him to do Howard's show a few times and he was happy to do it. He said that they turned around and rapped him and he didn't want to stand for that. Soupy said that he had done everything on radio before anyone else had done it. Soupy said he had been on radio since before Howard was even born. He thought that Howard was an act at first but then found out that it wasn't. Soupy talked about Howard moving his piano out of the studio like a little kid. He said he doesn't know Howard personally but he didn't like him professionally. The caller thought Howard had a lot of growing up to do. Soupy said he likes to work with pros and he wanted to get along with everyone.
Howard said that he was very much on fire back then and he was insane. He had a lot of anger in him back then. Howard said he read one obituary where Imus said he remembered Soupy being a crabby old guy. Howard seemed amused by that. Robin said it was pretty funny. Howard said he wasn't going to get along with anyone back then. He said it was just such a bad situation.
Howard said Robin tried to help him make up with Soupy back when they were working at channel 9 (WWOR) once. Howard said they were there for a long time and Soupy was walking around the building for some reason. Howard said Robin told him to go make up with the guy. Howard didn't want to do that because he was such an asshole. Robin marched Soupy into the room and they had words and Howard said he told Soupy he loved him. Howard said he told Soupy that it was a bad situation and things just went from bad to worse. He said he explained to Soupy why he was so pissed off at WNBC and Soupy told him that he couldn't care less. He said that was the last he saw of Soupy. He said he may have run into him one other time.
Howard said it pains him to think that he gave Soupy any problems. He said that he didn't want to cause him any pain. Howard said he was very sad to hear about his death and he will always cherish him for what he did on his show when he was a child. Howard said he was a great broadcaster and he was first rate even though he might be known as a third rate kind of guy now.
Howard said he was sad to see that he died in a hospice in the Bronx. Howard said the guy was so irreverent and he wanted a show just like his when he was a kid. He said he loved Soupy Sales. Robin said that he really did love him because he was so happy to see him when he showed up on their show in Washington DC.
Howard thanked Robin for dragging Soupy into the room that day at Channel 9. Howard said Soupy was 83 and he had been sick for a couple of years.
Howard said Benjy interviewed Soupy one time and pissed him off. Benjy said that he was his first hero too and he remembers seeing him on TV back when he was a kid. Howard said Benjy really must be lying about his age if he saw that show.
Howard had some audio of Benjy's interview with Soupy Sales. In the clip Benjy asked him if he was crapping his pants as they spoke. Soupy got upset with him and told him he was done with him. Benjy begged not to be thrown out and then he threw himself on the ground pretending that they threw him down.
Howard said that Soupy always sounded confused when he was trying to explain something on his radio show. Howard said he figured that anyone who was listening to his show must have been dizzy after listening. He did an impression of that and said no one knew what he was talking about. He went on and on goofing on the way the guy spoke. Howard said Soupy did a radio show in 1953 so he wasn't bullshiting about doing a radio show before he was born. Howard said it must have sucked doing a show with a creepy guy like him that was way more successful at it. Howard said he hopes Soupy can rest in peace. He said he's pretty sure you don't go anywhere though.
Howard wondered if there is a heaven, do flies go there too? He said that maybe dogs go too and the place is overrun with dogs.
Robin said they went there but Jared wasn't working that night. She said that some of his co-workers recognized them and gave them a bunch of drinks and the next thing she knew it was 5 in the morning and they were at a pizza place. Robin said she had pizza dough with vegetables on it. There was no cheese on it or anything like that. It was like bread with veggies on it.
Robin said that they went to the bar and there were guys at the bar. Howard asked if they were talking to them. Robin said ''Sure!''
Howard wanted to talk to Ross about it but he wasn't in yet. Howard said Ross stays out late too so he shouldn't be too upset. Howard jokingly said that he saw that Ross was at the lawyer's office.
Gary said Ross was a little upset about Robin keeping her out so late. Gary said it wasn't his story to tell. He said that Ross claimed that he texted his wife at 3 in the morning and no one responded. Howard asked what kind of schedule he has there because it's 9:40 and he's not at work yet. Gary said he's the vice president of marketing there. Howard said you'd think that the guy would be there by now. He said he might as well not come in since his wife isn't home anyway.
Howard asked Robin why she stayed out that late. Robin said she had no idea how late it was and she should never do shots. Robin said the next day they were all texting each other and she was on her way to Yoga. She didn't even have a hangover. Howard said that might mean she's an alcoholic.
Ross showed up so he came in and said that he was kind of upset. He said that he was out on Friday night too at the Sam Benrubi party. He said they went to dinner at Nobu and then to Rick's. He said he was home by 1:30 in the morning. Howard said that's why his wife is staying out. Ross said he could have been home at 3 if he knew she was going to stay out until 5.
Ross said Melissa told him that she was going out for a drink at 11 and he woke up at 3 in the morning wondering where she was. He said he didn't get a response from her. Ross said he wasn't too worried since she was out with Robin. Ross said he didn't know what his wife was wearing when she went out.
Ross aid he was calling her at 4 in the morning and didn't get an answer. He said at 4:15 he couldn't sleep at all. He said that she should have called. Then at 4:50 she called and said she was in the elevator and they had been out eating pizza. He didn't believe that. Ross said that he was pissed off and Melissa told him that they were just out talking. Ross didn't believe it but Artie said that broads can talk. They'll talk about anything.
Ross said that what Melissa did can't be compared to what he did the night before. He said she should have called him to let him know where she was.
Ross said Robin and Melissa were in a photo booth taking pictures. He said that he saw those. They weren't topless or anything though. Ross said he asked about Jared being there and she told him that he wasn't there but other guys were sending them shots instead. Robin said that they didn't have to pay for any drinks.
Howard said he would be pissed too but Ross is always out until all hours. Ross said he's never been out until 5 in the morning unless he's out in Vegas. Robin said that they did six shots and that's why they lost track of time.
Robin said they had to put a stop to the drinks that they were getting. She said that they knew it was too much and had to stop it. Howard asked who got more numbers that night. Robin said they didn't take any numbers. She said that the one guy they spent the most time with was there with his girlfriend.
Robin said that she and the girls were dancing together and not with other guys. Robin said that no guy would want to dance with them the way they were singing and dancing together.
Howard said that Ross does the same thing with his guy friends out in Vegas. He'll stay out until 5 in the morning like that. Ross said that he and Melissa had angry sex that night.
Ralph called in and said that Melissa is super hot. He said that this is the one time that she went out for a long night and all hell is breaking loose. Ross said she's gone out many times but not communicating with him is what he has the problem with. Ross said he tried to call her like 10 times.
Robin said that the music was blaring in the place they were at. She said that they left around 4 and went to eat. She said that they couldn't hear the phone ringing. She said that Ross is out all the time too. Ross didn't know how that was a defense. He said she should have let him know where she was.
Howard heard that Ross was at Nobu yelling out the Yankees score. Howard said it's not a McDonalds. Howard told him he can't be doing that. Ross said that there were some girls next to their table that he thought were Yankees fans. He said people around them were curious about the scores. He said that he was just sharing with everyone and that's what Sake can do to a person.
Ross apologized to the people who were there and to Richie Notar the owner. Howard said people make reservations to that place a year in advance. Ross said that he's sorry for doing that but it's his personality. Howard said he can't do that at a place like that.
Howard said the Howard TV guys had a shot of Jared's abs. The guys checked that out and Ross aid that he'll never look like that.
Gary said that he and Ross went to see Bruce Springsteen a few weeks ago and he'll yell out stuff during the show when songs are going to play. Gary said that Ross ended up yelling at a guy for talking too much at the show. Gary said that they figured that Ross had just met himself at the show because the guy was doing the same stuff Ross does. Ross said that he should be the only one yelling out like that.
Steve said that the Jay Leno Show death watch is on. The people at NBC are saying that they're not going to be putting on the cheapest shows, they're going to start putting on good programming. Jon said he thinks that they'll keep his show on through the rest of the season and then cancel it next fall. Howard wondered why they'd let it go that long. Jon said they don't have anything to fill that slot.
During that conversation Artie mentioned that he's going to be on Jimmy Fallon's show this week. He said tomorrow night.
Steve said the Captain Janks mess is getting worse. They have new details about the courts wanting a whole list of the clubs that Janks ripped off.
Steve said they have some news about the show that Artie did in Detroit and some comments from the people who ran the event who saw the way Artie was reacting.
Steve said that Riley Martin's show is returning at 7pm tonight. Howard had to go to break after that and asked Jon Hein to hold on through the break.
Howard asked Robin to start her news after playing her in with the song parody ''Robin Likes to Take It In The Can.'' Howard said they're also doing a cougar beauty pageant there and women can win a $5,000 grand prize that comes from their sponsor Cougarlife. Women have to be 35 and older to enter. Gary said they're just going with the definition of their web site. Howard said he thinks it should be women between 40 and 50. He said that Beth is 37 so she would be considered a cougar. Robin said it depends on what the women are going after. Artie asked how old Courtney Cox is. Gary said she's 45 and Artie sounded shocked. Gary said she's so hot that he wants to curse. He said he's has a crush on her forever. Howard told Gary to change the rules and make it women 40-50 but then he figured they'd just leave it at 35.
Robin said she was in a cab and driven by the most annoying driver. She said that he calls himself a human computer and he was making people read things about him. He can tell you want day of the week you were born on if you give him a date. Robin said he insists on doing it and he doesn't charge you for it but he says that he'll take whatever you give him as a tip. Robin said she told him she had no interest in doing that. She said that he showed her an article about him that was in the NY Times and makes you read it. She said he insisted on her giving him the date of her birth. She refused and then he played her a Podcast about green printing and it was so boring. Robin said the whole thing was awful. She said she was so happy to get out of that cab.
Howard took a call from a woman who said Rosie needs to be on his channels. Howard said he agrees. The caller said that Dr. Laura is on that channel 102 and she's a psychotic bitch. Howard said he didn't know she was on there. The caller said she thinks she says the stupidest things ever. She thinks that Rosie belongs on Howard's channels. Howard said he thinks she'll do just fine on that radio show.
Robin was reading about the salaries of what some people can make working in the city. The dancers at Rick's can make $150,000. Bartenders can make that or more too. Howard said that's the job to get if you're out of work. Robin said that chauffeurs are making up to $200,000 too.
Howard took a call from a guy who said that Robin is looking beautiful these days. He said he can't believe how old she really is. Robin said that she can't believe it either. The guy also told Robin that if she ate dough, she ate yeast and yeast has egg in it. Robin said she wasn't aware of that. Howard said that she ate egg but she won't even admit it.
Howard asked Fred and Robin what the seven wonders of the world were. Howard asked if the Pyramids were in there. They said they are. Howard said that's the only one he knew. Howard asked about Stonehenge. Robin said she didn't think that was in there. Fred said a lot of the stuff is stuff you don't hear much about. Fred found the list and read them off to Howard. It was all a bunch of ''ancient shit'' according to Fred.
The guys ended up talking about the Yankees win in the playoffs. Artie said he thinks that the series is going to be great. He said that it's two Stern cities, New York and Philly, and it should be a great game. There's also a great football game on the same Sunday. Artie said that Philly is going to be going nuts that Sunday. Howard said he thinks that the Yankees are going to fall apart an lose the series.
Howard wondered if Artie was going to make it to the Series without getting depressed. Artie said he's a crazy person so he has no idea. He said he could go to a Wednesday game but he won't because of the show. Howard wondered if Artie was going to relapse during the game. Gary asked if he's going to be drinking. Artie said no to that.
Artie asked where the Mets are going to be watching the Series from. Gary said that's the kind of attitude that makes him root against the Yankees.
Gary said he saw Kate Hudson on camera during the game and she was praying for A-Rod and it's getting to be a bit too much. Artie said he doesn't want to see Kate Hudson at all. He said he doesn't go to the movies to see her and he doesn't want to see her at the games. He said he doesn't want to see her in movies and he certainly doesn't want to see her at a baseball game.
Howard read a story about how Jay Leno's show was beaten by the show ''Son's of Anarchy'' which is a on a cable channel. Jon Hein said that it wasn't beaten overall but in the key demographic is was.
Robin read about Janine Lindemulder and Jesse James fighting over the custody of their child. She's in a halfway house right now but she will be seeking custody of her child after the end of this year.
Robin read about Steve Phillips losing his job at ESPN over the controversy that broke out with him recently there. Howard said he's not sure they did the right thing. Howard said that chick may not have ever had sex with anyone else based on her looks.
Robin read a story about a Chicago bar that got into trouble for barring black students and claiming that they were doing it because of baggy jeans.
Robin read about a twin car bombing in Baghdad over the weekend. Over 130 people were killed in the bombings.
Robin read about a guy who was found dead in his swimming pool and he was apparently part of the Bernie Madoff scandal. They're saying that it may have been his heart that gave out though.
Robin read about Madonna doing some charity work for the people of Malawi. She had some details about that and some other charity stuff in Ethiopia.
Artie was joking about the hanging upside down thing that Rosie mentioned to him earlier. Artie said that he'd probably end up shitting himself while hanging upside down and getting shit all over him.
Robin read about the Yankees win in the playoffs. She had some audio of Derek Jeter talking about that. She also had some audio of fans talking about the win.
Howard read a story about a guy who was in jail and asked to be kept there so he wouldn't have to go back to his wife. Howard said they actually sent him back.
Robin read about the new Michael Jackson movie ''This is It'' that's coming out soon. She had some audio of the director talking about working with Michael. He had a bit of a stutter at one point so Howard and Artie had some fun with that.
Robin read about Jon and Kate Gosslin going to court today about their divorce. Robin also read that Paranormal Activity being number one at the box office this weekend. Howard said that's going to inspire a ton of shitty low budget movies to come out soon. Howard had Fred playing buzzer noises while they were talking about that. He said there was a lot of buzz around that one so Fred had about 5 different sounds he was playing. They had to end the show a short time later, right around 10:45am.
Benjy said that he'd like to know if there are any rules about it there. Gary said that they probably shouldn't be taking interns to strip clubs. He said that it's probably not a wise thing to be giving an intern alcohol because it could lead to something going wrong.
Jon asked Gary if he thought JD did anything wrong. Gary said he didn't. He said that he was going to go in and say something today but it was all so convoluted. Gary said that JD is there at all hours of the night so he sees a lot of email that they don't see. Gary said that Scott and JD get a lot and forward a lot to everyone. JD said he also looks stuff up on the internet for the guys to read.
JD said he gets a lot of email tips about TV stuff too. He can't watch every show so he has people telling him what to record. Gary said JD should never stop doing what he does. He said he just pushes stuff to where it needs to go.
Jon asked why Ronnie is so angry at JD if he's just doing his job. Gary said that Ronnie and JD just don't get along. He said he was convinced that Fred was stacking email against him one time about his weight and he got mad at Fred over that. It turns out he wasn't doing that though but he can see why Ronnie would feel that way.
JD said ever since he saw his dyed goatee Ronnie thinks that he has something against him. JD said he kind of likes Ronnie except when he's yelling at him. He also likes tweaking him on the air.
JD said that Ronnie leads Howard to his office every morning and he came to him and asked if he has something against him. He said that someone told him about the emails he was sending. He said that Ronnie got mad at him and walked off in a huff after that.
Gary said that if the same email was forwarded from anyone else they would have sent it along without even thinking about getting Ronnie in trouble.
JD said he forwarded that email to Tracy and asked her if it was okay to forward to it to other people there. He said he sent that out on Friday morning. He got the OK and sent it out to everyone else.
Gary and Jon asked if JD expected Ronnie to react like that. JD said he wasn't sure how it was going to play out. It was just something that happens. Gary said he didn't think much about the whole thing but it wasn't about Ronnie in any negative way. JD said that there wasn't that much about Ronnie in the email. It was just about Pete hanging out at Rick's and Ronnie was watching him.
Jon brought up Ronnie's canceled radio show and pointed out that Ronnie flat out asked for his show back from Tim Sabean but Tim turned him down since it was JD's cal.
Ronnie came in so Jon asked him if he would give up his source if JD gave him his show back. Ronnie said JD has a lot of issues and he's a very disturbed boy. He said he's very jealous of people and very angry at people. He said that he has major anger issues. JD found that funny and pointed out Ronnie's anger.
Ronnie said that JD got that power to take something away from him and he did it. That's fine with him. He said that he took the show away from him for the stuff that he was saying that upset him. He said that it's like a little kid taking something away. Ronnie said he's tired of the whole thing.
Jon asked JD if it was a vengeful thing taking the show away. JD said it wasn't at first. He said he didn't think the subject matter of his car show had anything to do with the Stern Show. Ronnie asked about the Chuck Zito show. JD said that chuck has been a guest on the show. Ronnie said that he has too.
Ronnie said that he doesn't get why JD is able to make that decision. He said that if Tim wanted to take it away from him then he should have taken it away, not JD. Ronnie said it's a farce to let JD have the power to do something like that. He didn't understand why he got that power. Ronnie said that Tim should put his foot down, plain and simple.
Tim Sabean came in and said that he loved the Auto Show but Howard gave JD the power to take the show away and he has to stand by that. JD said that Tim asked him to give him his show back but he won't do it until Ronnie reveals his source of the leak. Ronnie said he won't do that. He told JD that he's a dimwit and he should go get some help because he really needs it.
Gary asked Ronnie if somebody flat out told him that JD sent it. Ronnie said he was told flat out. He said he won't say who told him though. He said he's answered enough questions about that. Benjy said that he thinks it's Tracy but Ronnie said that it wasn't her and he had to call her to explain what was going on.
Gary said that somebody felt the need to pick up the phone and tell him the information when it has nothing to do with him other than him hating JD. Ronnie said that he was told that there might be some backfire from the whole thing. Ronnie said that's when he heard it was JD who sent it.
Gary asked why the mole won't come forward. Jon said that it is kind of odd. Jon asked if they respect Ronnie for not coming forward. Gary said yes, JD said it's okay that he was ratted out and it's okay that they aren't coming forward.
Ronnie said that he's always tried to be nice to him and he doesn't return that. He said that there's something that bothers him and he finds any opportunity to knife him in the back. Ronnie said he's not even blaming him for this whole thing. He said that there have been other things that he's done that piss him off. Ronnie said that JD has something against him and he's not sure what it is.
Jon asked Tim if he's the leak. Some of the guys thought that it had to be Tim or Jason. Tim said that he told Ronnie about what was going on and he told him not to worry and everything was fine. Ronnie said he knew about it before Tim came to him about it.
Gary and Jon asked JD why he thought this was Jared. JD said it was just instinct and if he was wrong he's apologizing to Jared about that. Jared was in the studio too so he told JD that it's bullshit that he blamed him when he had no facts. He said he threw him under the bus for no reason when that whole thing came up. Jared said JD was looking for ways to throw him under the bus no matter what.
Tim said that they deal with a lot of sensitive and confidential stuff and they know that Jared isn't doing that. Jared said he has had a lot of stuff that's much more sensitive than this and it's bullshit that he's blaming him. JD said he was sorry about that.
Jared said he thinks that JD is jealous of the relationship that he and Ronnie have. JD said that's not true. Jared said that JD stopped hanging out with Ronnie at Rick's when he started hanging out there. JD said that Jared is giving himself way too much credit.
Gary asked Jason to bring him the list of people who are on the ''Guys'' list on their email system. He wanted to look at it to see who else was on there.
JD said that he thought of Jared because of the relationship they have. Ronnie asked if it was over the cookie thing. JD said that wasn't it.
Jon took a call from a guy who said that it's sad that JD can't even speculate in the office. He said that whenever you bring up JD canceling Ronnie's show it sounds like his voice is warbling. Ronnie said that it still bothers him and it would bother anyone if they had their show taken away like that.
Gary was looking at the list of people on the ''Guys'' list for their email. Artie, Benjy, Dan the Song Parody Man, David on the tapes team, Doug Goodstein, Fred, Gary, JD, Jason, Joe from Howard TV, Mike Gange, Sal and others were on there. Jason said that he would stand proud if he was the one who was the mole.
Ronnie wasn't saying who it was. He wasn't defending other people like Doug Goodstein. Benjy asked him if it was Doug. Ronnie said he's not saying anything. Jason told him to just tell them. He refused.
Ralph called in and said he thinks it's Doug because he has a connection to Rick's and he wants to save it. He also said that this is an internal matter that could get Ronnie in trouble. He said he thinks that JD was wrong in this case. Gary said that the email wasn't even about Ronnie and it was more about Pete being at Rick's.
Ralph asked JD about the process he used to get permission to send the note out to everyone and wasn't sure if he was right about it.
Jason said that if it could get Ronnie in trouble he could have just sent it to Howard or Gary directly. He said that no one would have sat on that note. It would have gotten back to Howard and Gary somehow. Jon said that Howard even said that he would have gotten mad at JD if he hadn't sent the note out.
Ronnie said he didn't invite Pete over there, he just showed up. Ronnie said he saw Pete wandering the hall alone.
Gary said that if a 22 year old, female, intern showed up then it would be a different story. Ronnie said that he wouldn't let it happen. He said that Pete is a different story. Jason said he's sick of hearing Ronnie being the good guy because he brought him up on stage at the club.
Ronnie said Pete was there by himself wandering the hall. Jared was there too and said that Ronnie helped Pete out getting a cab and drinking water among other things. He said that Ronnie was taking care of the guy to make sure he was okay.
Jon took a call from a guy who said he can't understand why Ronnie can't figure out that Howard was the one who fired Ronnie and it wasn't JD. Ronnie said he's spoken to Tim off the air about it and it wasn't Howard, it was all JD. He said that the whole thing is a farce. Gary said that Howard did hire JD though. Ronnie said that JD could just say that he wants the show back in a joking way and Howard would bring it back.
Another caller said that he'd try to get JD as close to him as possible and then turn it right around on him and show his true colors. The guy said that they've done that at his work place. Gary asked how they find the time to get work done then. The guy said that they find the time. The caller said that he wouldn't work with JD for 10 minutes and called him a weaslie little fuck.
Another caller said that JD speaks so well when he's talking about Ronnie and he was wondering why that was. He said it's like John the Stutterer losing his stutter when he gets angry. JD said he doesn't know what that's about. The guys figured he was just comfortable talking about that subject.
Another caller asked if upper management was there with Ronnie and why they didn't do anything about it. Tim said that Pete is a big boy and he can do what he wants. Tim said he dealt with the situation accordingly on Friday morning.
Ronnie was going off on JD again and Jason told him to just get over it and shut the fuck up. Ronnie got pissed and said that he was sick of their bullshit and walked out of the studio. Jon thanked him for coming in. Jason scared him off but he said he didn't mean to.
Jason said that he's never seen a grown man get so angry over something so dumb. He said that anyone there would have forwarded that email to everyone. It's not like JD was the only one who would do that.
JD said that Ronnie was thanking him for canceling his show a couple of weeks ago because he got other job offers. Now he's all pissed at him again for cancelling his show.
A caller said that all Ronnie does is whine and wine on the show. He said he's like a little bitch. Steve Brandano came in and said that there was a little powwow between Ronnie and Mike Gange in the hall so maybe he was the mole. He said you never know who it may have been.
Jon saw that JD and Jared were having a discussion about something. JD had just told Jared he could have told Howard it was Gange. Jared said that it's a fact that JD doesn't like him. He said that's why he threw him under the bus today.
Mike Gange came in and said that he hasn't had Lotus Notes since Wednesday also he didn't know this was even going on. He said he's not the rat. Gange said that he wasn't the rat and he's not sure who it was. That's what he was trying to find out from Ronnie out in the hall.
The guys were starting to point fingers at Sal. Gary said that Sal is used to being accused of inappropriate behavior around interns so maybe he gave Ronnie the heads up.
Jon took a call from a woman who said that Howard is brilliant. She said that the way this stuff is going makes her think about just how brilliant Howard is at bringing this stuff out. She said she has no idea who it could be and she's so confused about it all. She said she doesn't think it really matters in general. She said that Howard giving JD the power to cancel Ronnie's show was brilliant. She said that they're all like a bunch of mice in a maze right now.
Gary said he saw that the note JD sent out went out at 11:18 on Friday morning. Benjy said that they should be able to track down the mole now that they know it's a person who has a phone and is awake at Noon. They had to go to break a short time later.
Jon took a call from a guy who said they sound like The View today talking about this stuff. He said that maybe Benjy is the rat. Benjy said he's not. He said he wouldn't consider that being a rat. Jon asked Benjy if he was the person. Benjy said he wasn't going to answer that. Gary said they were getting sucked into that vortex so they gave up on trying to get an answer.
Another caller said he thinks that it was Sal. He said that Sal has had issues with Human Resources and interns so he knows that it could cause problems for Ronnie and he would know. Gary said that it would benefit Sal to do that but he's not sure that it was him.
Benjy said the person who told Ronnie probably didn't even think that they would get into trouble for telling Ronnie.
Another caller said that maybe it was Tracy who told Ronnie. The guys said that Ronnie already said it wasn't her.
Jon took a call from a woman who said she thinks that Ronnie needs to take a pill. She said that He's got so much hate for JD and it's out of control. He said that he projects all of his hate onto JD even if it's not his fault. The guys said that he did get beat up pretty good today and he did appear to be pretty worn out from the whole thing.
Jared said he got a call from a bartender friend and heard that Robin was there. He said it's not really a college like bar like they were saying. He said it's more like people who are a couple of years out of college. someone described it as a grad school like bar.
Jon brought up Rosie O'Donnell and how she related to Artie in that way she talked about. Gary said she came in talking about his book and how great she thought it was. Gary said the first 20 minutes of the interview was really good and he said that was the last direction he expected it to go in. He said that it wasn't all that funny but it was very interesting to listen to.
Jon found it interesting that Tim played along with the Sybian thing with Rosie and didn't tell her he wasn't the inventor. Gary said Tim will go along with stuff like that all the time. He said he's weird like that.
The guys talked about the story Artie told about Rosie's stand-up that one night and how Artie remembered that last line she had that he enjoyed.
Jon took a call from a guy who said that JD should give Ronnie his car show back. He yelled at everyone about that. Another caller said she agrees with that caller. She said that Ronnie is like the pretty girls that she was jealous of in school. She said that JD has this hatred for Jared and he has it out for him. Gary said he doesn't think JD did anything wrong forwarding that message but maybe he shouldn't have thrown Jared under the bus. The guys had to end the show a short time later but Gary pointed out that Sal hadn't come down there to defend himself about begin the mole.
Howard started the show talking about Craig's Radio Hall of Fame which only has him and Ronnie the Limo Driver in it at this time. It's a fan created hall of fame.
Howard took a call from a guy who said the Rosie interview yesterday was great. Howard said he wasn't sure if she had ever spoken about her father like she did yesterday. Robin said she's pretty sure she hadn't. The caller said that it was great and he didn't expect it to be that good.
Howard said he got an email from Rosie and she corrected him on something. It wasn't Petra Nemkova who gave her the phone number, it was another model. She said it was Peta Wilson. She said that she's not saying she's gay either, she just got her phone number. Howard said he was worked up more about Petra Nemkova than that but whatever.
The caller said he hopes that he stays on the air there. Howard said he's not sure he's going to do that because something is irritating him these days. Howard said he's going to talk to his agent about it. He said there's something rubbing him the wrong way there and he's not sure how he's going to handle it. He doesn't want to be a baby about it but it might be time to go in a year.
Howard said it's just something that bothers him and he's rather just leave than try to fix it. He said he's just a little disgruntled. He said he loves it there and maybe he could change the schedule and stay but he's not sure about that either. He said he might talk to Robin about it off the air and let her know what's going on. Howard said he doesn't want to be all cryptic, he just wants to handle it.
Howard took another call from a guy who said that Rosie's interview was all over the news yesterday. Howard said he saw a lot of people talking about it and it was making the news. He said he thought a lot of the dad stuff would make the news but it was other stuff that actually made it.
The caller asked Howard to ask Stephen Stills to play a certain song today. Howard said they already requested that he play Sweet Judy Blue Eyes but they're not sure if he's even going to do that. He said they haven't heard back about it yet.
The caller also asked Howard to talk to Stills about how the Grateful Dead influenced him. Howard said they've been looking into some stuff and they found that they used an ''nigga'' reference in a song. Sal came in and told Howard that it was actually 'er' and not the ''nigga'' like he thought.
The caller asked Sal if he's the rat from yesterday. Sal said he was but then said he was just kidding. Howard said he never thought of Sal being the leak. Sal said he's a ball breaker but he's never a rat.
The caller talked to Artie about how great it was to wear his Yankees shirt to work yesterday to rub it in with the other fans.
Artie said that the New York papers are getting over confident about the team winning. He said they have to just relax and play ball. He said that everyone is getting too over confident, even the Philly fans.
Howard said everyone loves A-Rod all of a sudden. He's been reading the letters people are sending in to the papers. He said that people are taking back what they've said in the past. Artie said he has his DVD coming out that he shot back in May and he talks about how A-Rod sucks in October every year. He said he was still shitty back in May so he's going to leave that stuff in.
Howard asked Artie if he loves A-Rod. Artie said he is a good player and right now he does love him. Howard was asking him the questions as if they were in a musical. Artie wasn't playing along at first but then Howard asked him to answer in song form. Artie started to sing his answers a little bit but that didn't last long since they were talking sports.
Artie talked about the players that he really loves on the Yankees. He didn't love A-Rod a couple of weeks ago but now he's okay with him. He said he just wants them to win the series. He said that the DVD he has coming out has a joke about Rosie on it too. He said she was so nice to him when she was in and this was done back in May. He said that he doesn't want her to get mad at him. Artie sang that he loves Rosie after Howard sang a question about that.
Howard asked Artie if he knew what song he was singing. Artie said ''No, because I'm not gay.'' It was a song from Fiddler on the Roof. Howard explained that to Artie and sang more of the song to him. Artie said he loves his parents for not taking him to see that play.
Fred had a clip from the play that he played for Artie to hear. It was a scene that Howard had just explained to him.
Artie said his father once brought them to a drive in movie and he and his sister were put in the trunk. He said they got there and saw about 2 minutes of the movie and had to leave when Fritz the Cat started fucking someone.
Bobo called in and asked Howard if he thinks that David Letterman would call him at home to talk about what's going on. Howard said Dave never calls him. He said he doesn't confide in him at all anymore. He said Dave tried to do that years ago and he regrets it because he exposed what they talked about on the air. Howard said Dave won't be calling him about this stuff.
Howard said Dave would have to be very disturbed to talk to him about that stuff. Howard said he wouldn't have anything to say to Dave about that either. He said maybe he has other people he could call about his problems. It won't be a call to Howard Stern though.
Howard said Dave would be better off calling Bill Clinton to get some advice. He went into his Clinton impression and had some fun coming up with the advice Bill might have for him. He said it's all about the DNA and making sure no one can find any evidence. Howard stayed in his Clinton impression for a few minutes goofing on Dave and the situation he's in. He gave Dave advice on how to keep on fucking those chicks and how to make sure his wife doesn't find out.
Bobo asked if Howard thinks Dave will have him on the show again some day. Howard said he's not sure but he's not looking to be on that show anyway. Howard said he doesn't want to be on the show but he'd go on when Dave would ask him or Scott Greenstein would ask him to go on.
Bobo asked Howard to pretend he's on Letterman's show and Paul is playing music really loud. He suggested that Fred play the loud music and Howard do some improv. Howard laughed at Bobo for telling him to do something like that. He went into it anyway. Howard yelled like he was trying to talk to Dave during a commercial break when the music is really loud. Howard asked Bobo if that was okay. Bobo seemed to like it so Howard let him go after that.
Howard said Dave got really pissed at him one time for upsetting his wife when he said something about her. Howard said now he can turn to Dave and yell at him for upsetting his own wife.
Artie said he was listening to some old shows when he had the problem with the hot chicks and Dana when he did Letterman that one time. He said back then Howard yelled at Vinnie to make sure that Dave stayed away from the hot chicks. He said it's really funny now that you look back on that.
Howard asked Bobo what he's doing all day now that he's retired. Bobo said he works a couple of days a month but he's got a 3 year old now so he has to take care of the kid. Bobo said that it's a lot of work taking care of a 3 year old. Howard said working is easier. Bobo said that's true.
Howard said Bobo is a driving instructor and he used to have kids throwing mayonnaise packets in his hair and stuff. Howard said kids are great. The guys wondered if the 3 year old plays with the hair.
Artie said he was really close with Lenny. He said he came up to him at a concert a couple of years ago and he went to some shows with the guy. He got to know his brother and his brother got close to him and his mother and sister. He said his mom called him hysterical crying last night when she found out. Artie said it was the most shocking thing ever.
Howard asked Artie if he's going to go back into his depression over this. Artie said he doesn't think that he will. He said he didn't know this was going to be in the paper but his brother is his road manager too. Howard said he was sorry to hear the story.
The caller said he went through some meltdowns himself and he'd love to see the Artie show down in Orlando if he's still doing that. Howard thanked him for the call and let him go.
Howard said Scott Greenstein was happy about the Rosie interview making the news yesterday. Howard had some audio from shows like Access Hollywood reporting on the interview. They reported on the stuff Rosie was saying about Oprah Winfrey possibly being gay and on Rosie's relationship. They played a couple of minutes worth of the interview in that report.
Howard said after a piece like that people must want to subscribe. He said it sounds like something wild is going on there in that clip. Howard said that was a nice piece they did. He said that's the show that's hosted by Billy Bush.
Howard said he had some audio from The Insider too. Howard played that clip and they reported on Rosie's comments about her relationship. They had some dramatic music playing in the background as they were talking about that. They also reported that Rosie and Kelli were still having sex.
Howard said he doesn't get the whole relationship thing where people break up but keep having sex. Howard asked Robin if she would do that with Jim Florentine. Robin said she wouldn't do that if she had broken up with someone. Robin said that she knew someone who did that for years with an ex though. She said that she was always running aback to the husband to have sex with him.
Artie asked Howard if he would let some ex-girlfriend hot chick come over and fuck him if he was single. Howard said he would. Robin said the women are still emotionally attached to them if they're doing that and the guys don't seem to understand that.
Howard said he had some women who wondered why they couldn't still bang. Howard said they thought that Beth wouldn't care if they continued to do it. Robin said they just wanted to ruin his relationship with Beth. Howard said that's probably what it was.
Howard played a new Baba Booey song parody to the tune of a Crosby Stills and Nash song. Artie said it's never ending with the song parodies.
Gary said he got a note from someone who was at Soupy's funeral and they said that 96 year old Irwin Corey got up and started to rant about health care reform. Howard said he read about that in the paper and he was saying that Soupy would still be with us if he had better health care. Howard said there were some other people who spoke as well.
Howard said that they have this Howard TV Beetlejuice special coming up this week (Starting October 29th). He said he thinks it's a 5 part special and it's very funny. He said there are some great moments with Beetlejuice. Howard said there's one moment where Beet is coaching a professional boxer. He said it's his favorite clip of all time.
Howard said Beetlejuice sounded like any boxing trainer in the ring. Howard said you think that he's out of it but he sounds like any other boxing trainer. Howard played the clip of Beet talking to the boxer, Bobby Rooney, who is also Beet's manager now. Beet was telling him to just do what he tells him and keep his mind on him and do what he's got to do.
Howard said this boxer has his hood on and he's forehead to forehead with Beet listening to everything he says. Howard said this guy is right in his face even though Beet's breath can be horrible. Howard said this guy is the toughest guy he's ever seen.
Howard said Beet also goes out driving with Bobby and they put a lipstick camera in the car so he wouldn't get nervous. Beet is talking and talking but then he just falls asleep. Howard said it's fascinating to see how Beetlejuice lives in this special.
Howard played the audio of Beet snoring in the car. He said the visual is even funnier. He said Beetle also hates the Jews and he had some audio of that. He played that and Beetlejuice is talking about how he would say ''fuck you, you Jew.'' if he ran across any. His manager asks him about his Jewish friends like Bob Levy and Shuli. Beet said that Shuli is Catholic, not a Jew. Beet said that he's not Catholic himself, he's just a regular person.
Howard said the most fascinating thing about Beet is seeing him driving around in the car and talking about going to Howard's wedding. Howard played some audio of that as well. Beet was saying that the wedding was all fucked up because Howard didn't show up. Beet said Howard never showed but his wife did. Beetlejuice was saying that Howard disappeared somewhere and didn't come to the wedding. Beet said they told Howard to go fuck himself. Howard wondered where he comes up with this stuff. Robin said it must be from movies or something.
Howard played a snoring clip and asked the guys if they thought it was Beetlejuice or Howard Stern. It was Howard. Howard said Beth told him that he hasn't snored since that time she recorded him. Howard said they say that if you hear yourself snoring then you can actually stop it.
Howard played a prank call the guys made using his snoring clips. They called a pizzeria to place an order and had the guy calling just fall asleep in the middle of the call.
Howard played a clip of Ed Torian singing some Crosby Stills and Nash. Howard said they'll enjoy having Stephen there. They'll have to ask him about pushing Gary down.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked if he checked out the Wrap Up Show yesterday. Howard said he did and there was a lot going on there.
The caller said he has a lot of respect for JD standing up and having balls the way he does. Howard said JD handles power well and he has stood up to Ronnie over the show being canceled. Howard said he gave JD the power to get rid of it and he's sticking to his guns with the decision. Howard said he's not sure if he's right or wrong but he's sticking to that decision.
The caller asked what else they could give JD the power to decide on. Howard said they could let JD decide whether or not to keep Benjy around.
Howard said Ronnie and JD were going back and forth with each other on the Wrap Up Show. He played a clip of JD talking about Ronnie being paranoid about his decision. JD explained why he thinks that Ronnie thinks he has something against him.
Ronnie was also talking about the issues that JD has and how he needs to get help. Howard said it sounds like Ronnie is the one who has issues and needs the help too.
Howard said JD stuck to his guns during all of that. Then Jared came in and went off on JD too. Robin said that the whole JD and Jared thing was weird. She said that it sounded like JD thought for sure it was Jared who leaked the information to Ronnie. Ronnie and Jared ganged up on JD and kept on him but JD didn't seem to care. Jared talked about the way JD stopped coming out to Rick's with Ronnie when he started to hang out there with Ronnie. JD said he was giving himself too much credit.
Howard said Jason came in and went off on Ronnie and then Ronnie ripped off his headphones and walked out saying he was done with that whole thing. Howard played that clip too. Jason was telling Ronnie he was being a crybaby about the whole thing. JD ganged up on him about that too. Then Ronnie snapped and walked out saying he had enough of their bullshit.
Ralph called in and said that this might be the best thing ever on the show. He said that you never hear JD so clear on a subject. He said that he's very clear and focused on this whole Ronnie thing. Robin said that JD might need more power. Ralph said you have to respect the way he's handling this whole thing.
Howard took another call from a guy who said that Robin really likes this Jared guy. Robin said he's a good looking guy and JD hates him because of that. Robin said that JD decided that Jared was the rat just because he dislikes him so much. Howard said Robin is really into Jared.
Howard asked Robin how she knew where Jared's bar was. Robin said Jared told her where it was. Then she said that Jared didn't even tell her where it was, he told other people. Howard asked Robin if JD and Jared were on the boat and it crashed onto a wall under the wall and they could only save one, who would she save. Robin said it would be JD because she knows him better. JD was in the studio so they figured she was saying that just because he was in there.
Howard said Jared has his arms all over Robin in this one picture he had of her. Robin said they just took a picture together. Howard asked if Jared shaves his body hair. Gary said that the guys there say that he does shave his body hair.
Howard said he manscapes but he doesn't shave down completely. Artie said the real answer to the boat question is that Robin would jump off the boat with Jared.
JD said that he was trying to apologize to Jared on the Wrap Up Show but that didn't work. JD said he had some other people in his mind for the whole rat thing. Howard asked him to report on who those names were. JD said he's not going to say that on the air because the person could be a friend. He said that it was just instinctive to say what he said.
Howard said he keeps hearing that Richie Wilson is the leak. JD said he's heard rumblings too. Howard told JD to email the names to him. Howard said he would do the investigation.
Artie said that the cookies that Ronnie claims he's bringing to Jared are actually for Tim Sabean. Jared doesn't look like he's eating any cookies. Howard said that Tim is wolfing down those cookies like they're going out of style. Tim got on Gary's mic and said that he isn't eating any of those cookies. He said he isn't eating any of that crap.
Richie Wilson called in and said that he's not the rat. He said that he hasn't even spoken to Ronnie that much in the past week. He said he was home with the flu for a week. Howard said it sounds like he's cleared then. Ronnie came in and said that it wasn't Richie. Ronnie then said that he's out of this whole game with JD and his radio show. He said that if he puts the show back on then he doesn't want any part of it. He said he's done with JD. He said that his goal is to destroy the kid. He said he will destroy him somehow. He said that before he goes to his grave he will destroy the kid. He said he will find something to put him down and he will destroy him.
Howard said he wants to ask him a question but Ronnie got out of the studio before he could. He didn't want to be in the same studio with JD.
Howard asked Ronnie to come back in but he wasn't coming back. Howard said it sounds like he's investigating JD. Ronnie came back and said that he won't do anything physical, he will just fix his fuckin' ass somehow. He said he will destroy him and he had better watch his back. Ronnie said he tried to watch his back from the beginning but he turned out to be a fuckin' asshole. Ronnie said he tried to help get him girls back in the day but now he's done. He said that JD is happy to stick it in his back and he's done with him.
Ronnie said that he's not going to talk to JD in the hall and if something happens to him he's going to walk out the door. Howard said JD lost a good friend in him then. Ronnie said he has problems but JD has problems too. He said that he gets upset that he's friends with Jared and that bothers him.
Howard asked Ronnie what he'd do if Artie attacked JD. Ronnie said he'd laugh but then he said that it is his job to stop that so he would have to stop it.
Howard asked Ronnie if he would sleep with JD's mother if he had the chance. Ronnie said he doesn't want to do anything like that. He said it's nothing physical and he won't make up stories. He said if he found out he was blowing a guy there he would tell everyone. He said he's going to have people following him around everywhere to find something on him.
Howard said it sounds like Ronnie does give a fuck about everything. Ronnie's birthday is coming up tomorrow so they asked him how old he's going to be. Ronnie said it's 75 but he was just joking about that. Artie figured it was 60. He said whatever age he is he looks better than him.
Ronnie said he doesn't want to talk to JD anymore and he's so immature and such a baby he doesn't want to talk to him. He said that Howard is making all of this stuff up to get to him and he's done.
Howard asked if they can bring JD in to work things out. Ronnie told him to do what he wants. Howard had JD come back in and Ronnie said that Howard is the one who instigated the whole thing. Howard said he never thought JD would have the balls to take the show away from Ronnie. Ronnie said he has a bone to pick with Tim too because he says the show should be back on the air but he won't bring it back.
JD said he just forwarded an email from a listener and now he's in trouble with Ronnie. Ronnie said that this isn't the only thing he's reported on. He didn't have anything else that he could remember that he could accuse him of.
Howard said that Dominic Barbara claims this is a dangerous thing. He said that it's a hostile work environment and he's making threats toward JD and he could get into trouble over it. He told Ronnie to be careful. Ronnie said that they're not threats, he's just saying he's going to destroy him. He told JD that he has to watch his back too. Ronnie said that those are not threats though. Dominic said they are threats and he has to watch what he says. Dominic said he will give him a solution and said that he will take him on a boat trip.
A caller said that Ronnie has to go on with Dr. Ablow to work this out. Ronnie said he's not going to do that. JD said he'd be up for it but he doesn't think he needs that kind of therapy. Ronnie told Howard he can do whatever he wants, it's his show.
Another caller said that Ronnie's show was even worse than Riley Martin's show was. He said that JD made the right decision canceling the show.
JD thought it was just the show that got Ronnie so mad but Ronnie said it's not just that. He said it's a bunch of things. He didn't know what those things were though. Ronnie said that he's just crazy, that's why he's acting like this.
Melrose Larry Green called in and said that Ronnie is right about JD and he loved his car show. Ronnie said that he's full of shit and he knows he's just jerking him around. Howard said Melrose thinks that he should have gotten the job that JD has and that's why he hates JD so much. Howard said he thinks that Ronnie hates JD because he forwarded some stuff about his house party to people on the show. JD said that stuff was on SternFanNetwork already so he didn't just send it on his own.
Howard took another call from a guy who went off on Ronnie and his auto show. He said that the show was awful and JD made the right decision. The caller told Ronnie to watch his back.
Another caller said that this is good for JD and he's glad that he took the show away. He said that Ronnie is always bothering people in the hallway so he deserves this. Ronnie thanked him for the call.
Howard said he's sorry that they can't get along in the halls. Ronnie said he's just done... done. Ronnie said JD has no feelings. JD said he doesn't want anyone to feel that they want to destroy him. He said he does like Ronnie, well, not right now, but he does like him sometimes. JD said he's sorry and he thinks that Ronnie can be a nice person... when he's nice.
Howard took a call from a guy who said that Ronnie is a big baby and he's just describing himself when he's talking about being like a little kid having his toys taken away. Ronnie just went along with it all. He thanked that guy for his call too.
Another caller said that Ronnie is like the bully that beat up on the kids like JD and Jason and now it's like Revenge of the Nerds. Ronnie said ''yeah, whatever.'' Artie said that Jason had better be careful with Ronnie because it's going to be really tough for him to watch his own back.
JD was saying that maybe they could give him his show back. Ronnie said he doesn't want his show back now and if they do bring it back they can give it to the other guys who were on the show with him.
Howard was singing the Fiddler on the Roof song again asking JD and Ronnie if they loved each other. JD sang that he doesn't love him right now. Ronnie wouldn't sing. Howard asked if anyone loved Scott the Engineer. Ronnie said that Scott is his buddy so he loves him. Ronnie asked why they didn't ask him if it was Scott who was the rat. JD said that he wasn't there on Friday and he doesn't see him going around reading his email on his Blackberry.
Robin said that they have another situation where they have people not talking in the office. Ronnie said that he talks to everyone except JD. He said he even talks to Jason. Howard had to go to break but Ronnie said he had something else to bring up.
Ronnie said someone wants to throw a birthday party for him and he needs to know it's okay. Howard told him to just do it. He said that it's going to be at Rick's so he wanted to make sure it was okay with Howard. Gary said maybe that should be up to JD. Ronnie thanked him for that.
Howard had JD come in again and asked him if he thinks that Ronnie should be able to have a party at Rick's Cabaret. JD said that Ronnie probably wouldn't let him go. Ronnie said he'd be fine with him being there, he just wouldn't talk to him.
Howard said that Lonnie is a good guy and he gets a lot of plugs for the club on the show. Howard said he feels that they're taking advantage of Lonnie's kindness when they have parties there. Howard told JD that maybe they're costing them a fortune over there and maybe they should stop it. Ronnie said he works there though so it's a different story.
Howard asked JD what he thinks about the party. JD said he gives permission to have the party. Howard asked if it's wrong that he's taking advantage of the place. JD said it's not really taking advantage and it's ''tit for tat'' there.
Howard asked JD where he stands on this. JD said that he will allow the party and he's doing this as an act of an olive branch. Ronnie said he's still not his friend. Howard asked JD if he will go to the party. JD said he doubts that he would. Ronnie asked what he's afraid of. Ronnie said that he won't be out to get him at the party and this has nothing to do with it. He said JD could have a great time there and he won't break his balls at all at the party. JD said it would be weird to go to someone's party where the guy wants to destroy him. Ronnie said that's fair enough.
Howard said he sees a little crack in Ronnie's armor already. Artie said he sees JD's destruction. Howard told Ronnie to have a good birthday party. He wrapped up and went to break a short time later.
Howard came back and said he had to mention his favorite Jackson is Latoya. He said she was always great on his show when she'd come on. Howard read an article about Michael's kids going into therapy over their father's death. Latoya has been talking about them and what they're doing now that Michael is dead. Latoya says that they're taking it pretty bad. Howard said maybe she shouldn't be talking about what's going on. He figures that those kids are doomed. Howard said he figured someone there would be normal enough to raise the kids but now he's not so sure.
Howard said this guy Al Sharpton has balls on him like no one else on the planet. He said that he's involved with the whole Jackson family. He read about how Sharpton is saying that the world needs more people like Joe Jackson, who has been accused of beating Michael Jackson. Howard said that this is the civil rights leader telling people this. He said that Sharpton wants more people like Joe Jackson to keep their kids in line.
Howard said that the NY Post has a picture of one of the Philadelphia Phillies in a dress and calling them names. Artie said that you don't want to piss off the Philly fans by getting so cocky. He said they should just play ball.
Howard asked Robin what's going on with this airline that was lost for an hour and a half. Robin said the guys fell asleep and overshot the airport by an hour and a half. Howard said they're now saying that they were on their laptops and missed where they were. Robin said that everything that they're saying is against regulations so they're wrong no matter what they claim they were doing.
Howard said that they claim they were working on airline stuff on their laptops. Howard said it makes no sense of course. Benjy said that their reasoning made sense. Howard cut him off and asked what was on his eye. Benjy said he had just put lotion on there because it was kind of dry. Howard said it looked like it was cum.
Benjy said that the pilots were claiming they were looking into some stuff on their laptops about what their schedule changes would be. Howard said that excuse doesn't sound right to him. He said he doesn't buy it because they had people knocking on the cockpit door and they didn't hear that. If they were just working on their computers they should have heard that and the alarms that were going off.
Howard said that they claim that Larry King is being beaten by some other shows on other news networks. Howard said he thought he always did better than the other channels but now he's being beaten.
Lisa said that Anthony Bozza has started working on Artie's second book. Artie said that this kid is really good and he helped write his first book and also helped Tracy Morgan write his and Slash's book too. Artie spent a short time talking about that and he kept scratching his underarm. He said that it's been bothering him since Howard brought up the deodorant thing.
Howard told Artie to switch to Nature's Gate Spring Fresh. He said that he loves this stuff. Howard said he smells great and he loves it. Artie said he may have to switch. Artie said he's been thinking about it since Howard brought up the aluminum thing in the deodorant.
Howard said they claim that the metal is absorbed into your skin so you're not supposed to do that. Howard said that this stuff doesn't have aluminum in it. It has aluminum salts in it but that's not the aluminum that's bad for you.
Lisa read more about Anthony Bozza saying that Artie was more fun to work with than Tracy Morgan. She said that Steve Grillo is no longer employed at the pizzeria he was supposedly a partner in. Robin asked how that's possible if he was a partner. Lisa said Grillo claims that he got nothing in return for plugging the business so now he's out looking for work. He's going to try and get some acting work.
Howard played some of Grillo's interviews from Comic-Con in New York City. He got one with Angie Everhart. Grillo asked Angie about dating Howard and if she had any messages for him. Angie said that she misses Howard and still loves him. Howard said when you date him you stay in love. Howard said it's hard to follow up after dating him. Benjy asked if she was one of the girls that called and said they should still be having sex. Howard said she was not, absolutely not.
Howard played more of the Angie interview and she was saying that Howard was the best she'd ever had. Grillo asked her how they met. She said they met at the gym. She also had her baby with her there so Grillo asked about that. Grillo asked her if that was something she had to do before her life ended. Angie said that the baby was the best mistake she ever made.
Lisa said it sounds like Howard and Angie had fun. Howard said they did and she has no idea. Howard said one thing about him is that he can be very creative. He said the girl has to allow him to be that way. Howard said if a girl is up for it, he can be very exciting. He said he can keep it real and wild too. He said Lisa G might just pass out after hearing that.
Howard said some girls are very conservative and some are very open to stuff. He said that some don't read the whole menu and some do. Howard said he is a good in bed and that's about it. He said that once he's outside of the bed he's not that much fun and Beth would probably confirm that.
Artie said he's probably not fun anywhere. He said he might be fun in bed for a little while but that's it.
Howard said he can be creative in bed. He said he can be fun too. Howard said that Lisa's imagination can take her to where he's talking about. He said he knows Robin would be up for this kind of fun. He said even Lisa might be up for it if she'd just open her mind.
Howard asked Lisa if she would let him just take over. Lisa said yes. She said she would trust him. Howard asked if he tied her up, would she trust him. She said she would. Howard said that they should go right now then.
Artie asked Lisa if he could just tie her up and have nothing sexual done. She said that maybe she could tie Artie up in front of the refrigerator. Artie said that sounds fine to him.
Howard asked Lisa if he could shave her if he tied her up. She said she doesn't think she could do that. Howard said that she's not letting him take control then. Howard went into detail about what he'd like to do to her if she was tied up. Lisa thought he was saying stuff that he had done to someone. Howard said this is just something he's making up.
Howard asked if this aroused her in any way. Lisa said if she was dating him then it probably would. Howard asked Robin if she would be into the shaving thing. Robin said that's not for her.
Artie asked Lisa what she would do if he walked into the room. Lisa cut him off and said ''No!'' before he even got anything out.
Howard had more Steve Grillo interviews to play. He said that he ran into this Helen Slater who played Supergirl in the movies. Howard said she was very cute. Artie agreed with him on that. Howard said Grillo annoyed the crap out of her.
Grillo asked Helen who she was. She had to tell him who she was and what movies she was in. She told him that she played Supergirl and has been in a bunch of other movies. Grillo asked her if David Letterman should be castrated. She said he shouldn't be but she didn't understand why he was asking her these questions. She didn't want to answer them.
Grillo asked Helen if she thinks that Superman or Darth Vader would win in a fight. She said Superman would win. Grillo asked her an F, Marry, Kill game but she didn't want to play. Grillo asked if she had ever had sex in her costume. She didn't like the questions and stopped answering. When Grillo asked her who the biggest asshole was that she's ever met. She pointed at him. She knew that Howard Stern had put him up to this and asked if that's who put him up to it.
Howard said Grillo ran into Lou Ferrigno too. He said they had a nice conversation too. Grillo asked if letterman should be castrated. Lou said something that Robin didn't understand. Grillo asked Lou some more questions and he had a few ''No comments'' in there. Grillo asked Lou if he had ever thought of Miley Cyrus in a sexual way. Lou said no to that. Grillo asked who the biggest asshole was and Lou said that it might be people that are rude like one of the hotels he was staying at. Grillo asked if he had ever shit his pants. Lou said he probably did when he was a kid.
Grillo ran into Todd Bridges next. He asked him the same questions that he was asking everyone else. Todd ended up talking about the gay marriage thing for a short time. He also said that Henry Fonda might be the biggest asshole he had ever met. He said he wasn't a very nice guy. Grillo asked him what age he started masturbating. Todd said it was probably 10.
Grillo ran into Tom Wopat from the Dukes of Hazard. Grillo asked him who he was and who he was waiting on line for. Tom told him who he was and Grillo said that he was a fan since he was about 10. Grillo asked the Letterman question and Tom wondered what the hell he was asking him that for. Grillo asked if appearing there was the pinnacle of his career. Tom said that's not what it is. He said that Conan O'Brien was the biggest asshole he had ever met. Howard said he wants to know why that is but Grillo didn't ask more about it. Howard said he might have to get that guy in there to find out the story.
Grillo got an interview with Vinnie Pastore. Grillo asked him the masturbation question and Vincent said it was around 9. He said he once shit his pants on his way to an audition. He also said that he had sex about 2 nights ago when Grillo asked him that. Vincent said that he doesn't like gay people but then took it back and said he doesn't get why a guy would want to suck another guy's dick.
Howard said that was a nice line up there at Comic-Con. Howard said they had a lot of interesting facts come out of that. They had to go to break after that.
Howard came back after the song and said it was a big day for him. He said there is no bigger Stephen Stills fan than him. He was trying to speak but Stills was tuning his guitar. Stephen wasn't able to hear him on his headphones. Howard asked Scott what was going on.
Howard said he had Scott set that up for him and he didn't get it right. Howard tried to talk to Stephen but he kept saying he couldn't hear him. Fred told him to use the megaphone. Howard got on the megaphone and told Stephen he wanted to hang himself. Stephen told him to just get a new guy.
Howard asked Scott what was going on. Scott was busy trying to get things set up but Howard said he has only himself to blame for this. Howard said maybe it's because he doesn't really have the headphones on. Howard said this is the most unprofessional organization.
They finally got the headphones working so Howard asked Scott what happens there. Scott said that they had them working earlier.
Howard asked Stephen some questions but he said he had trouble hearing because he has hearing said. He said that he's had bad hearing since he was a kid. Howard asked him if his parents were upset that he was into music. Stephen said they weren't at all.
Howard said Stephen must have gotten a lot of girls when he was young. Stephen said that wasn't the case. He said he didn't get a lot of girls. Howard asked if he locked himself in his room and just played music. Stephen said he was painfully shy. He said that he had sisters and they were loud and he just stayed quiet.
Howard asked Stephen if he was going to perform Sweet Judy Blue Eyes this morning. He said he wasn't because it was too early and the notes were too high.
Howard asked Stephen how songs appear to him. Stephen said he doesn't know, they just show up. He said these days he'll just start typing and the lyrics will come to him and then he'll put the music down. Howard asked how long it can take to write something like Sweet Judy Blue Eyes. Stephen said that one didn't take but a week or so.
Howard asked if he just brought it to the other guys and said he wanted to play them. Stephen said he had demos that he's turned into an album now. He had an autographed copy for Howard this morning.
Howard said he ranks Stephen in the top 10 guitar players of all time but he doesn't get that credit. Stephen said that he works with two of the biggest camera hogs in the business.
Stephen said that he used to be the leader of the group but when David Crosby got sober that stopped. Howard asked when he became a rock star. Stephen said when his confidence came up that came around. Howard said that Stephen has 7 kids and he has 3 different wives for those kids. Stephen said that the oldest one is 38 and the youngest is 5. He said he's close with all of them. He said all of his wives are still friends with him.
Howard asked Stephen about his divorces and how he worked all of those out. Stephen said that you have to avoid the lawyers and just learn the law for yourself. He said that he learned that the laws were based on statutes in the 1870s so you can talk reason to people if you tell them that. He said he had lawyers that he used but he was able to hold on to his money. Stephen said that none of them are deprived though.
Howard said that Stephen was trying to sell the Monkees some songs but they wanted to own all of them. Stephen said that he walked away when they said that.
Howard asked Stephen about the way the music business is these days. He said that it's kind of sad because the quality of the music in an MP3 is only about 10 percent of what it would be on a vinyl record. He said that it would also be better to keep people in business if they only sold records in stores. Stephen said he asked his daughter about it and everyone is downloading now.
Howard asked Stephen about working with Neil Young. Stephen said that they had a hard time with him at times. He said that they tried but Neil wanted to do what he wanted to do. He said that Neil sells out places that he can't sell out and it must be the luck of the draw.
Howard said that Stephen is a better song writer than the other guys in the band. Stephen said that he doesn't feel that way. He said he doesn't like to say things like that.
Howard asked Stephen about how he has written songs for the band that were turned down. Stephen said he has done that and then he takes them out and turns them into solo number one hits. Howard said ''Love the One You're With'' is an example of that. Stephen said that's not one of his favorites but it's a good one for Howard to bring up.
Howard asked Stephen how he met Jimi Hendrix. He said he met him when he was going out on tour with the Monkees. He said that he and Jimi went out to his house and played for a couple of days. Howard read that Jimi wanted him in his band but his manger didn't tell him about it. Stephen said that he and Jimi had been thinking about that and they didn't pass on the message to him. He said that was in the days when he was with CSN. He said he would have gone to that band if he had known about it.
Howard asked Stephen about the song ''White Nigger'' that he and Jimi collaborated on. Stephen said that they wrote the song together and it was about racism.
Howard said he thinks that when they recorded ''Tin Soldier's and Nixon's Coming'' he loved it. He said that Stephen must have worked on the song. He said he played on it and he thought that it needed another verse but they didn't think it did. Howard asked if he practices guitar on a daily basis. Stephen was plucking the guitar the whole time during the interview so he said he was doing that to distract himself from Howard's questions.
Howard asked Stephen who influenced him. Stephen said it was John Lee Hooker. He said he was living in Tampa, Florida and he would have to drive 100 miles to get to a record store. Howard asked if anything intimidates him. Stephen said that being in the studio with Howard was intimidating to him. He didn't know what was going to come from this loose cannon.
Howard asked Stephen if he was heavily into drugs back in the day. Stephen said that he never got himself into trouble but he's not sure what the definition of heavily was. He said that he had some problems with booze back in the 1980s. He said he would talk very loud when he was drinking. Howard asked if he would get into fights while drinking. He said he had a few.
Howard asked Stephen about the young kids coming up and who he likes. He said he likes Brandy Chandlis. He said he likes Snow Patrol too. Stephen said he likes a lot of the people who are turning back to folk music. Howard said there aren't people harmonizing like Crosby Stills and Nash did. Stephen said that it's something that's coming back.
Howard read that Stephen beat prostate cancer. Stephen said that he had an operation to get rid of it. Stephen said they go in through your belly button and they cut the whole thing out of there. Howard asked if he can get it up. He said he can but it takes a while but it does come back. Howard said that he has a few friends who lose their prostate and they can't get it up. Stephen said that it all depends on your wife helping out. He said his wife is 42 and she can make it happen.
Howard asked Stephen if he can cum with the prostate gone. Stephen said that you can but it's a different kind of cum. Howard wanted him to get into details but Stephen wasn't interested. He said that it takes about 18 months before it comes back. He said that it wakes up a little bit at a time. He said that it's better than being dead.
Howard said that Stephen has a new CD and DVD out now. He asked him to play something for them. Stephen broke into the Allman Brothers' ''Midnight Rider'' after that.
After the song Howard asked what the connection was there. Stephen said that one of the guys was his buddy. He said that they used to play together. Howard asked if he ever banged Bonnie Raitt. Stephen said no and said that Howard is so vulgar and rude. Robin told him he's been getting away with that for many years.
Howard asked if he ever had any famous women. Stephen said he refused to answer on the grounds of protecting their dignity.
Howard gave Stephen some plugs for his album ''Pieces'' and asked him to play some of his single ''Treetop Flyer'' since that's the song that's out. Howard asked if he picks the song or does the record company. Stephen said he doesn't pick the songs. He said he just performs the songs.
Stephen played ''Treetop Flyer'' for the guys. After playing that Howard said he has to learn to play the guitar. Stephen said you need about 10,000 hours of practice to play like that. Howard said that he was born into the right family too though.
Howard asked Stephen if his father was a tough guy. Stephen said he was tough but it was just his tone of voice and not beatings or anything. He said that his mother was harsh with him. Stephen changed subjects and asked if he wet his bed. Howard said of course he did.
Howard asked Stephen if he's upset that he didn't get to collaborate with Jimi Hendrix. He said that is one of the things that upsets him. Howard told him that he had tickets to go see him but he didn't get to go. He said that a lot of guys worshiped Jimi and his guitar playing.
Howard asked Stephen if his father got to see his great success. He said that he did. Stephen said that he may have worried about it too much though. He said that he misses his dad but Howard didn't think he was sincere about it. Stephen said that he didn't want to talk about it because he's blowing material for his book.
Howard asked Stephen how he plays ''Love the One You're With.'' He showed him how he plays but Howard told him he was doing it wrong. Howard said he can play it but it's much differently. Stephen performed a little bit of the song but cut himself off saying that's the reason he doesn't play so early in the morning. Howard told him he was great and he can see that he wants to wrap up so he was going to let him go.
Howard asked how much it would cost him to get him to show up at his house to perform. He said it would be about a million but only because he knows what Howard is worth. Howard said he saw Fleetwood Mac playing at a guy's house this summer in the Hamptons.
Howard asked Stephen what the biggest thing he ever bought was. He said it was a 1964 Stratocaster guitar... and a Ferrari. Howard said he can't tell him what it meant for him to be there today. Howard said he was blown out by his talent and thanked him for the million hours of listening he's given to him. Stephen said that Howard is a very nice guy and he's full of shit trying to make people think he's not. Howard gave Stephen some more plugs and went to break a short time later.
Howard came back and said they should cover that song. Artie started to sing the song, ruining it. Howard said that Stephen Stills is one talented dude. He said he didn't see him talking guitars with Fred. Fred said he wasn't talking anything with anyone in there. He said he just plays and he plays very well and knows it.
Howard asked Robin about her Celebrity Jeopardy episode. Robin said that should be airing November 17th. Howard said he wants to see it so he told her to remind him about it. Robin said she would do that.
Howard heard that Robin is making a movie for Beth's charity. He said Beth is done with her's. Gary made one too. Howard said he heard that Robin's is over budget and a huge production. Howard said Gange said it's like a nightmare. Robin said she's like that guy Stanley Kubrick. Howard said she's into the third day of this thing and it's still going on.
Mike Gange said that he thought it was already due. Robin said she didn't know when it was due and she yelled at Gange to find out when it was due himself. Robin said that she wanted to shoot it when Gange was sick so that's why it's delayed. Gange said that he's trying to help her but she wants him to figure stuff out for her.
Howard asked if Robin is directing or handing over the reigns. Gange said she's handed them over to him. Robin said that they've got her back to the wall. Howard asked if it's too much pressure for her. Robin said she was ready to start weeks ago and it just came down to this. Gange said she didn't have a concept in mind. He said that she's just giving him everything to do.
Gange said that she yells at him for things that aren't his fault. He said he had to be at a place at a certain time but he has a lot of work to do. Robin said he's backed up because he was out sick. Gange said she yells at him about everything.
Artie said that she does work like that and he knows that from working with her. Howard asked if Robin is a good director. Gange said he doesn't know because Robin doesn't direct. Gange said that he did the whole movie the last time too. Robin said that he didn't write any of it and she took the pictures for the last one. She said that she was with him through the whole shoot.
Gary asked Robin how long the movie has to be. Robin said it's 2 and a half minutes. Gary said she didn't know that yesterday and she blamed Gange for that.
Howard asked Gange what else he has to do. Gange said they did one more interview this morning and they're halfway through editing. He said that Robin will get a copy of the edited version tonight and he'll get notes tomorrow. It should be done by Thursday. Howard asked how much time Gange has put in and how much Robin has put in. Robin said they've put in the same amount of time. Gange said that's not true because he's editing the thing. Robin asked if he wants her to edit it too. Gange said no but he said that he's got to carry stuff around and meet her at places where she shows up late.
Robin said that Gange wants to say he's doing this by himself but he's not. She said that she has to be there with him all the time so he knows what to shoot. Gange said he doesn't know what the concept of the movie is so he has to have her there to help out.
Gange talked about how ugly Robin's cats are. They're hairless cats so they're not very attractive. Robin said she loves those cats. Gange also said that Robin doesn't have a lot of furniture to sit on. Robin said that she's got plenty but he wanted to sit on the one chair that was too small for him. Robin said that she wanted him to sit on a stool.
Howard asked who is harder to work with, Robin or Ralph. Gange said he has to go with Ralph on that. Howard said it sounds like Gange is doing a lot of work for this thing. Gange said that it was a whole day of getting yelled at. Gange said Robin's cats are afraid of her just like everyone else so they were well behaved.
Howard told Gange to get out of there because he has a lot of work to do on this film. Artie told him to go find an enormous chair to sit in.
Steve said they have more on the Leno Show's failure. He said that they're saying that Jay Leno is more annoying when you're awake than when he was on later at night. Howard said that was a shithead move for him to go to 10 o'clock. Howard said he should have gone to ABC or something else.
Howard said he told Jimmy Kimmel that he should just keep going with his show and he'll do fine. Howard said he's doing fine now and he's not getting bashed like Leno is.
Steve said they have a Howard Stearn running for town council in a small town. The guy is 25 years old and the name gets conversations started.
Artie said that people think that he's running for mayor of Hoboken and he's not. He said that they think that he is running but he won't be doing that and he has to let people know because he gets stopped out on the street all the time.
Jon Hein came in with his Wrap Up Show preview next. He ran through his list of subjects for today's show. They ended up talking about Scott the Engineer screwing up today but Scott said that a cable had just come unplugged. He said that they were supposed to do a run through before coming back from break but they didn't end up being able to do that. Jon ran down a few more subjects and wrapped up his show preview.
Robin read about Mark Sanford and how they're thinking about impeaching him.
Robin said that a writer has come forward in the Letterman case. She was a writer on the show and she felt weird working there with what was going on with office sex.
Robin read about Steve Phillips and the problems he's had since he was caught cheating. He's been fired from ESPN. Howard said that guy must be a sex addict because the chick he was with isn't that attractive. Howard said that guy deserves a medal for being with that chick.
Gary came in and showed a picture of the chick that quit Letterman's show. Howard said she's kind of cute and this was 20 years ago that it happened so she probably looked even cuter. Howard and Benjy thought she had a Sarah Silverman look. Artie said she was like a Sarah-Jessica Silverman.
Robin read more about the Steve Phillips story and how they're saying that his kids are in bad shape since the girlfriend contacted them about his affair. Howard said a lot of guys fuck around on the side for many reasons. Howard said that he doesn't think he should have been fired over it.
Robin read about another ESPN reporter, Bob Griese, who was yanked off air because of some comments he made about NASCAR driver Juan Pablo Montoya on air. This guy said that Montoya was ''out having a taco'' during a football game broadcast. Howard had the audio of that comment and he also had the apology that Bob Griese made on another broadcast.
Robin had some news about the Philadelphia Phillies coming to New York in preparation for the World Series. Robin said that they're going to have a work out at Yankee Stadium today. Artie said he's glad it's two east coast teams. He said the first game is tomorrow and he's glad that the teams are close to one another in two big sports towns. He said it should be really good.
Robin said that the UN Secretary General's name is Ban Ki-moon and just thought that was amusing. Howard had some fun with the name but there was no story there.
Robin read that there are consumers buying food with less calories lately because they are showing people the calories on the menu now.
Robin said that the Northwest Airlines pilots that went off course for over an hour have come out and made a statement. They're saying that they were overly involved in working on their laptops. They're requesting that they have some privacy now. Robin had some audio of one of the pilots asking for privacy. Howard said he's pretty sure that'll happen. Like the media is just going to drop that story.
Robin said that Mark Maguire is coming back to baseball. He's going to be a hitting coach for the St. Louis Cardinals. She had some audio of the general manager talking about how Mark knows that he'll have to answer questions for the press once in a while. Robin said Mark has been very quiet since he left baseball.
Robin said a hotel owner asked his employees to anglicize their names. The guy said that it was just the people on the switchboard who were asked to do that. Robin had some audio of the guy saying that he's not a racist and he's sorry if he offended anyone by doing that.
Robin read a story about some neighbors who are upset about their neighbor hanging a Nazi flag outside his house. The police say they can't do anything about it. The kid's mother says that he doesn't mean any harm by it. Howard said that you shouldn't hang shit on your house or put bumper stickers on your car.
Howard said his whole apartment building lobby is covered in Halloween stuff and he thinks it looks so low rent. Howard said he's not sure what's going on there. He said he wants to know who approved it. Howard said he's 55 and over Halloween. He said he's not a scrooge but this is crazy. He said it looks like a club house for children.
Howard said Scott DePace once got road rage after seeing a bumper sticker on his car. He said Scott was going to try to follow the guy home. Scott said that wasn't quite the story. He said that he saw the ''Impeach Bush'' bumper sticker on the car and they were stuck in traffic and he wasn't able to lose the guy. Howard said the only bumper sticker that he'd approve is ''I'm Driving.''
Gary said Gange just told him that DePace just told them that when he sees an Obama bumper sticker he wants to punch them in the face because he know they're trouble makers.
Robin read about the H1N1 flu shots that are out and how they're suggesting that everyone get them. Howard said he wouldn't get one. He said he saw a video on the web where this beautiful girl was really fucked up after getting a shot.
Robin read some news about what's going on over in Afghanistan. She had some audio of people talking about how dangerous it still is over there.
Robin read some news about Laura Bush talking about breast cancer awareness. She had some audio of her talking about that. Howard said no one loves breasts more than him. Howard asked Robin if she gets her's checked every year. Robin said she hasn't in a couple of years. Robin said she hates getting them smashed in that machine. She said it's like putting it on a plate and smashing it. Robin said you put it on one plate and they smash it with another one. Howard said you'd think they'd come up with a different way of doing it. Howard said it must be a guy who came up with it as a way to torture her.
Robin read a story about some underage prostitution stings that have saved 50 kids. They found one child who was just 10 years old. They also arrested 60 pimps in the raids. Robin said that many of them were in South Florida. One woman was pimping her 10 year old daughter to migrant workers in Florida.
Robin said that the new Michael Jackson movie opens today. Robin said it starts at 9pm Pacific time. That led to Fred playing the Michael Jackson song that makes Artie cry. Artie said he'll go to see the movie and leave after that song. Artie said when he revealed that he was the only one who played that game properly. Robin said she did too.
Robin read some news about Barry Levinson saying that people aren't taking Saturday night TV very seriously. He thinks that they should be putting more programs on. The guys talked about some of the hit shows that used to air on Saturday nights years ago.
Robin said that they're saying that NBC is giving away advertising on the Jay Leno show. Howard said he heard that his barber bought an ad for $6. Robin said that they're saying that what they're getting isn't even close to what the popular shows like FlashForward are getting.
Robin read about a guy who left the Church of Scientology because of their stance on gay marriage. Robin said that the French have also been cracking down on the church and have fined people over some of the stuff they do. They don't even see it as a church over there. Robin wrapped up after that and they ended the show around 10:50am.
Jon said that they started off with Stephen not being able to hear Howard. Jon said that in 85 percent of the past musical performances there's something wrong. Steve Brandano said it's pretty much every one of those old performances. He said that there's always something wrong.
Gary said that they had a stool in the studio this morning and a microphone. He said they had a box for the cables to go in and a set of headphones. There wasn't much that could go wrong and it was pretty simple. He said that the headphones weren't working and he was surprised at that. He said the whole set up was done yesterday and it didn't work today. Gary said that Scott said someone disconnected a cable and he wondered if it was double checked this morning. Gary said he ran in with a set of wireless headphones and gave that to Stephen to wear instead. He said it's very frustrating.
Jon said it was kind of funny to see Stephen going for the cable himself. Gary said he thinks that Howard was too interested in talking to Stephen to blow up at Scott. Gary said that maybe he's a bigger fan of Stills than he is of the band Yes. Gary said that back in the day they used to have to have bands playing in the halls of the radio station. He said that when Sheryl Crow was on they had to stop her in the middle of the performance because Howard couldn't hear her singing.
Jon asked Gary if he thinks Steven gets the credit he deserves. Gary said he thinks everyone knows who the band is and he doesn't think that he's underrated at all. He said that he's not sure though.
Jon asked Gary what he thought about the way he was talking about Crosby and Nash and how he related Neil Young to Howard. Gary said he thought that was kind of funny. Jon said that Stills was saying that he
Jon took a call from a guy who said that Gary really puts up with a lot of crap there and he admires him for that. The caller said that he was trying to listen to Stephen Stills and it sounded like his speech was kind of slurred. Gary said he did hear that it was different than he was used to and it may have had to do with him being very hard of hearing now. Benjy said that he did talk about that but he also grew up with it. The caller said he never sounded like that before. Gary said maybe it just got worse.
The caller asked if any of the wack packers like Melrose Larry Green and the Underdog Lady are still in contact with them. Gary said that Melrose has been trying to get to New York for about a year now. Benjy told him that he called in today too. Underdog Lady does a show there on Howard 101 too.
Another caller asked if Stills looked old today. Gary said he does look older. He said he's like 64 years old now and almost 65. Gary said he looked about what a 64 year old would look like. Benjy thought he looked strong to him at first but then he looked older when he was standing and talking to Howard. He said he reminded him of an older version of Crazy Cabbie.
Jon said they requested that he perform ''Sweet Judy Blue Eyes'' but that didn't happen. Gary said they did request it from the record company but they told him that he was going to do whatever he wanted to do. Gary said that he did the Allman Brothers song and that really threw him off.
Jon said that Stills is a really prolific writer so it was odd that he played an Allman Brothers song. Gary said it was interesting and he did play that song of his own.
Jon took another call from a guy who said that he laughed the whole morning at the show. He said that the interview was great and Howard did a good job interviewing the guy. He said that Howard is a good interviewer. The caller was also saying that the Bunny Ranch chick was smoking hot the other day.
Another caller said that the Stills guy reminded him of that asshole who keeps strumming on his guitar when you go to visit them. Gary said that he has a body of work that lets him do that. the caller said that it was kind of rude for him to do that during the interview. He said he respects his music though.
Jon asked Gary if Stills ran out of there after the interview. Gary said that he was very nice and stuck around for a little while. Gary said that Lisa G had done an interview with him recently and he was happy that they were playing his music on the show and told her he appreciated that.
Another caller said that he's not one of the greatest guitars ever. He said that he's good but not one of the 10 best. Gary said he is pretty high up there in Rock and Roll royalty. Jon said that he has done a lot of stuff and that's what you have to think about.
Steve Brandano said that he thinks that he is very underrated and it was awesome to have him in there but also a bummer to hear him playing an Allman Brothers song. Steve said that was kind of a bummer to him.
The caller said that Jimi Hendrix and Eddie Van Halen were great guitarists and Stephen Stills has never really done anything like them. Steve said he thinks that he was the best guitar player in the band Crosby, Stills and Nash.
Jon took some more calls and one woman said that she's been waiting to call the show forever. She thought that it was ridiculous that they didn't have the headphones working for Stephen. Gary said the headphones were fine, it was Scott the Engineer that was the problem.
Another caller said that Jimi Hendrix was credited for playing on ''Love the One You're With.'' Steve said he wasn't sure if that was correct or not but he is credited for playing on that album.
Scott came in and said that they did check the set up for Stephen this morning and something happened. He said that someone must have stepped on a cable and the cable pulled out just enough that the headphones didn't work. Scott said they were supposed to do a sound check during the break and all of a sudden they were on the air. Scott said he had to fix it on the air and look like an idiot.
Jon asked Scott why it seems like there's always a problem. Scott said that it's not always his fault but there were many times that other people were brought in and they did the set ups. He said it's not easy to track down the problem if they're already on the air.
Ronnie said that Scott wasn't happy that Howard didn't get to him yesterday. He said that Scott said something to him about that when he came out of the studio after his fight with JD. Scott said he knows he's going to take a beating from Howard and he just wanted to get it over with.
Scott was saying that he wasn't jealous of Ronnie getting air time before him. He said he just thinks that it would be fine if Howard did review his DJ stuff from Vegas.
Jon asked the guys why they think Robin was defending Jared during that discussion this morning. Gary said it could have had to do with him being a good looking guy. Gary said that's like the time he stood up for Jenny McCarthy.
Ronnie said that Robin knows how to dish it out but she can't take it when they bust her ass. Ronnie said that Robin will get all over him for going off on JD because that's her little pet too.
Scott said that Robin sounds like she's being very mean lately. Ronnie said that she's never stuck up for him ever and she's been mean all this time. He said she's more cocky now than ever.
Gary said he thinks that Robin used to have a line that she wouldn't cross with younger guys but he thinks that she would do that with Jared if he was interested. He said that he can imagine her on a trip to Greece with Jared.
Jon asked Ronnie if he thinks that Robin likes him. Ronnie said that he does think she likes him. He said they don't socialize much anymore but they have in the past.
Jon took a call from a guy who said that midget Ronnie is a pussy because he's the guy who can dish it out and not take it. Ronnie said he takes a lot of shit there and the guy has no idea. Ronnie went off on the guy saying that he's busy sitting at home and he's probably just as short as he is. He and the caller went back and forth arguing for a short time.
Ronnie let the guy know that he was in the air force during that argument. Benjy said he had no idea. He was a staff Sargent in the air force. Ronnie was very hostile when they'd ask him anything about that. Benjy asked him why he left after 6 years. Ronnie said he was done, that's it. He said that was better than going to Vietnam.
Jon played a clip of Howard talking to JD and Ronnie this morning about their fight. That's when JD said that he was going to allow Ronnie's Rick's party.
After that clip Jon said that the olive branch came out during that. Ronnie said he wasn't buying that. Then he said he would give him that. Ronnie said he gave JD pancakes last week too. Ronnie said he's done with JD though and he's not going to be friendly with him.
Jon said he thinks that Ronnie has something planned for JD. Ronnie said he didn't mean to threaten him and he's not saying it in a threatening way. He said that he's just going to find a way to stab him in the back, but not literally. He said that he's going to have something blow up in his face so bad he won't want to come back to work there.
Gary said that Ronnie is going to hear something about JD and he will make sure everyone finds out about it. Ronnie said he's not going to wait to find out, he's going to look for it and make sure it ends up on audio or video. Ronnie said he has to watch his back. Ronnie said he has guys who work for him. He wouldn't say anything else about it. Ronnie was also upset with Tim Sabean for not getting back to him about his show. He said that Tim had a bunch of stuff he was supposed to come out with about JD but that never happened. They went over that for a few minutes before they had to take a break.
Jon asked JD about the movie that Robin is making and Gange is helping out on. JD said maybe there's a lack of communication there. He said that happens sometimes with the director and the DP. JD said he's not sure exactly what's going on there. Jon asked who he thinks is at fault here. JD said he really doesn't know and he didn't want to get in trouble over it.
Jon took a call from a guy who asked him to ask Howard to not talk about his contract negotiations. He also said that Robin pretty much blamed Gange for her film thing and she should have found someone else to work on her movie instead. He said now Gange has to work on the movie and not get paid for it. she's busting his balls and he's doing her a favor. Jon said that Gange has done this before and he knows what he's getting into. The caller said that Gange was sick though and it's not his fault that he wasn't around to do it. He said that Robin should have just let it go.
Jon asked JD if he thought the guy was right. JD said he doesn't know. The caller started to go off on him before he could answer. JD said that the video is only 2 and a half minutes long and it sounds like a lot of work for something that short. JD wondered what they're making. He said it must be the Lawrence of Arabia of short films.
Another caller said that Howard is the one who really fired Ronnie and Ronnie should be putting that anger toward him. Jon asked if he thinks that Ronnie is actually mad at Howard and not so much JD. The caller said that could be it. He said that Howard probably didn't like the show and he had JD fire him for him.
JD said it could ''kinda'' be that. JD said that this was all sparked because of an email. He said that they've gone back to the radio show now and he's not sure what's going on there. JD said he considered bringing the show back just to end this all and get Ronnie out of his life. Jon said that may have upset the people who respected him for sticking with his decision.
Jon said that Ronnie said that he's not threatening him in a physical way but he is going to keep an eye on him 24/7. JD said he only goes two places, his apartment and work. He said he hopes the guys like riding the train at night.
JD said Ronnie would have killed him if he had canceled his party. JD said he didn't even think of saying no to that. He said people would have been upset if he had done that. There was no way he could cancel that party.
Jon asked JD about Robin liking Jared and defending him today. JD said she might love the guy but he's really not jealous of that. They had to end the show a short time later.
Howard started the show asking Robin when she got home. She left about 15 minutes after Howard did. Howard was at a surprise party for someone and they stayed until around 8. Howard said he would have stayed longer but they had DJs who could have been playing in Carnegie Hall. Howard said people were talking to him and he had to yell to them. Howard said his voice was going and he had to get out of there. Robin said she's not sure why they do that. She said that Melissa was going to ask them to turn it down.
Howard said he got home and wasn't able to sleep. Robin said she has the same problem. Howard said he wasn't able to calm down. He said he and Beth had words and it gets him unsettled and he really doesn't need that. He said he's all cranky today because of that.
Robin said she was wondering how it was going to play out this morning. Howard said it won't make a difference, same shit. Robin said he was all happy last night. Howard said he took his parents out to dinner before the party. He knew there wouldn't be any food at the party.
Howard said they had some good food and some wine. He and his father polished off a bottle of wine together. He said he had a good time with them. He had to order for his father. He said he does a good job with that now. Howard said they went to an Italian place where they tell you the menu instead if letting you read one. Howard said his dad can't hear so the waiter had to speak loud for his father. Howard said his dad wasn't hearing anything and was just staring off into space.
Howard said his parents have been going out to dinner forever and he still doesn't know the ''rules'' about how to order. Howard said Beth was fascinated with his dad while he and his mother went to the bathroom. He said his father accidentally went to the ladies room at one point in the evening.
Howard said this place he went to is called Scalinatella and it's open at 5 which was nice. Howard said some places don't open until later so it was nice that they were open that early.
Howard said Beth got into a conversation with his dad. She loves his parents and she was kind of in awe of the routine that they have. His dad has 3 different things for breakfast and he rotates them. He has one thing one morning, then the next thing the next morning and so on. Howard said he told her that he tags the box of what he had one morning so he knows what to have the next morning. His mother said that he's a control freak with that. Howard said she's the looser one. Howard said she eats whatever she wants but his dad has to mark the box.
Howard said his father just won't change what he eats. He said he also has a routine for restaurants. Robin asked if that is OCD. Howard said it might be beyond OCD and he may have to call and talk to him today about this stuff. Howard said even if he didn't want cold cereal one day he'd still eat it just to stay in that routine. Howard said it comforts him somehow to stick to that routine.
Howard said his mother told him that they have a schedule of restaurants too. Monday night is KFC and his father gets two chicken breasts and his mom gets 3 legs. Howard said they plan ahead and never just go and make their decision. Howard said he knows exactly what that's like because he grew up in that house.
Howard said they go out to Nathan's on their wedding anniversary. His dad has 3 hot dogs when they do that. His mother said that he has some appetite when they go there to Nathan's. Howard said they don't even go there because it means anything special. Howard said they go to one in Oceanside and not the one on Coney Island. He said they just find it hysterical that they go there on their anniversary. Howard said he asks if it was romantic and they say that it's very romantic. Howard said Robin would go insane being around this all the time.
Howard wrote down that he has to call his dad today. He said Robin has to hear about all of this from his dad. He said they have this routine and his father is the one who sticks to it. His mother would like to go to other places but his dad just wants to stick to it.
Robin said she had that kind of routine when she was growing up. She said every Wednesday was liver. Howard said that's just gross. Howard said they stuck to that and you had to eat it too. They figured it must be a generational thing and they just stuck to the routine.
Artie said they stuck to a routine too but it was pasta, pizza and veal cutlets. He said there was good food on that table all the time. He said she can cook.
Howard took a call from his dad but it was just the guys in the back playing audio clips. They had Ben repeating himself and saying he couldn't understand what Howard was saying. Howard said that was just Sal fucking around back there.
Howard said he'd like to have his parents stay at his house but they'd be out of their routine so he can't do that. He said he was out running yesterday and all he could think about was his parents falling down the stairs in their house. He said he's a nervous wreck the whole day worrying about them. Howard said he needed a couple of drinks before dinner so he was pretty wasted by the time he saw Robin.
Howard said he tried to dance with Robin and he couldn't get anything going. Robin said it would have looked a little crazy if it was just the two of them. Robin said she didn't drink for dinner so she wasn't that loose. Howard said she blew him off when he asked her to dance.
Howard said there were some things over at the party that Artie wouldn't have liked. He said his friend Richie Notar did some weird stuff too. He was on a plane and did something odd. He said they reported in Page Six that Richie went on a plane and had a drink and an Ambien and passed out. According to the article he started acting erratically and his arms were flailing around. They had to move some females away from him because of that. Howard said he's not sure exactly what was going on there but they had to handcuff him and restrain him. Robin said that's crazy. Artie said he knows Richie and it doesn't sound like him.
Howard said a woman on the airplane said that Richie was taken off the plane in his underwear. Fred said he was hoping that was wrong. Howard said Richie explained it away nicely in the article.
Howard said the party was for Richie last night. He said that his wife didn't know where he was all day because he had been detained all day long. Howard said they have dropped the charges and Richie said that he remembers sleeping and that's it. He said he didn't know he was doing any of the stuff he was doing.
Howard said he'd love to have video of Richie doing what they claim he was doing. Howard said they put him in plastic flex-cuff restraints and he tried to chew them off. Howard said they took him off the plane and eventually dropped any charges.
Howard said Richie was on in Business class on the flight according to the article. Howard said Richie asked him to go easy on him in the morning. Howard said Richie is a good guy and he doesn't believe it was him on the plane. Artie said the lucky person on that flight was the woman who was sitting next to him. She had to be moved to first class.
Howard said they had a nice time at the party but there were guys walking around with no shirts on. Howard said he asked where the girls with no tops on were. He said he was talking to Marco Battaglia about that. Howard said his buddy Pat Minokia was there too and he asked how he could look like the guys who were walking around. Pat told him he'd have to shoot him up with all kinds of stuff.
The caller also asked about his father wanting to invest in KFC when they started out and he never did. Howard said that's right and he remembers going to a place called V-Brocks when he was a kid. They'd go out every Sunday to have their chicken and his father would tell everyone about this place. Howard said they all had to know what they were getting before they got there.
Howard said his mother would want to change up her order but that would make his father mental. Howard said they'd get this fried chicken at V-Brocks and have some mashed potatoes and gravy. Howard said his father loved that chicken. He said they'd have the same conversation week after week about how great it was.
Howard said his father asked where they got the chicken from and they said that it was a Colonel Sanders fried chicken and this was before they were big into the Kentucky Fried Chicken franchising thing. Howard said his father wanted to invest in the company and his mother wondered who would buy stock in chicken. Howard said the conversation went on for months in the house and his mother never did let him buy the stock. Howard said his father still talks about what the stock would be worth today. Howard said he could have had it for 39 cents and it was worth 40-some dollars at one point. Howard said they could have been wealthy people if they had gotten that stock.
The caller asked Howard if he and his wife ever argue. Howard said they hardly do but when they do Beth just refuses to talk to him. Howard said that's what happened last night. Howard said she just doesn't address it and that's not good. Howard said it kind of frustrated him last night.
Robin said that maybe Howard needs counseling with Beth. Howard said they don't need that. Beth has even said they don't have any problems and they don't need it. Robin said some people say they go even though they don't have problems. She knows one guy who said that they love each other more deeply after going. She said that sometimes you don't even know when you're developing a problem.
Howard brought up a story about this woman who wrote for Letterman and left the show claiming that she left because of what was going on with Dave and the girls at the show. Howard said her dream job was to write for Letterman even though she had written for The Simpsons and a bunch of other shows. They hired her and she now claims that she was always uncomfortable there because some women were rising up the ranks and they didn't deserve it because they weren't that talented. She figured that she would never rise up because she didn't want to play that game.
Howard said the woman claims that she resigned from the show and didn't tell Dave why she was leaving. She claims that she did think about it for a second but the woman Dave was rumored to be with was within ear shot so she didn't want her to hear it.
Howard said now that the allegations have come out this woman wrote the article for Vanity Fair. Howard said he thinks that's a little low to do that now. Robin said that when you do this stuff you do create the opportunity for people to kick you when you're down.
Howard said that this woman wrote about all of the shows that she's written for an she's done pretty well for herself since leaving Letterman's show.
Howard said there was a bunch of other Leno stuff coming out yesterday. Robin said she read about some of that stuff last night when she got home. She said she had to calm herself down and read that stuff. They kind of lost track of that subject for a while.
The caller asked Robin if she still talks to Mr. X. Robin said she doesn't. They called it off and that was it. Howard said he likes reading about the people who break up and still have sex, like Rosie O'Donnell claims she does.
Howard said he and Beth don't really have any problems and they don't need to get help. Robin said that she thinks that they should go to therapy just to get a tune up. She said that you don't buy a car off a lot and never get it service. Howard said he would do it but Robin needs to talk to Beth.
Howard said Richie Notar is 50 years old and used to lie about his age. Howard said he used to shave just one year off though.
Artie said that Olivia Munn was really into ping pong and you'll do anything for a hot chick. Artie said that Olivia wanted to play against him with a special guest. Artie said it was going to be him and Jimmy vs. Susan Sarandon and Olivia.
Artie said he's not a bad ping pong player. He said he's got pretty good hand eye coordination. He figured it was going to be a bit and didn't think that Susan Sarandon was going to show up. Artie said he did the whole show and had fun doing the interview. Artie said that he's a better host than a ping pong player. He said he got mad when he started to lose with Jimmy.
Artie said Olivia came out and that was great and they kind of went long so they almost had to bump the chef. Artie said then they brought out the ping pong table and she brought out this partner and Susan Sarandon walked out. Artie said they were going to play to 3 and he really wanted to win. He didn't want to look like an idiot. He said as a joke they gave Jimmy a paddle that was 4 times less the size of a paddle. Artie said it was like he was playing with his hand and he just wanted to kill Susan Sarandon and Olivia Munn in the game.
Artie said they started playing and Susan had the first serve. He had a volley going and Jimmy missed because of the paddle. He said they were down 1 - nothing. Artie had to serve and instead of saying one serving nothing, he said ''Scumbag serving Oscar winner.'' He said that got a laugh.
Artie said that Susan was mocking him asking him if he was high and things like that. He said she doesn't know who he is and what he does. Artie said that they went back and forth with a volley again and Jimmy missed again. He said they lost 3 to 1 in the game. Artie said he got mad because of that. He said it was very interesting to meet Susan and she said to say hi to Howard. Artie said she looks fantastic. He said she's so sexy.
Artie said Susan asked him to come down to her bar and host a night of ping pong. Artie said he wanted to bring up the movie Atlantic City where she was rubbing her tits with lemons. He said she had a little black t-shirt and pants. He said that Olivia was gorgeous too. He said she was in a white mini-dress. He said it was kind of distracting. Artie said that they had a lot of fun playing but it was one of those surreal things. Howard said it sounds like a fun night for him.
Artie said Susan had no idea who he was so she asked them all to go out. Artie said that they were all going to Spin, the ping pong club, and he had to say no. Artie said he had to get up early to do the radio show. Artie said Susan said to him ''Oh wahhhh, ohhhhh.'' She really didn't know who he was and she still did it not knowing that he does that to people too. Howard said it shows he's disciplined. He said he's proud of him for saying no to that. Howard said they're all wrong about that.
Howard said Jimmy wrote to him and told him how good he was on the show. Artie said his girlfriend got Susan's email and they're going to talk about playing ping pong and stuff at Spin.
Howard played some of the audio of Hulk talking about how he wanted to kill himself and almost crying. Hulk said that he had a gun in his hand and he was thinking about pulling the trigger until he got a call that may have saved his life. Howard said he's going to ask Hulk to cry there.
Howard said Ronnie is bringing his grandson to the show to meet Hulk today. Howard wondered how old the kid was and Fred said ''forty'' but the kid is actually only 9.
Howard said when Jay Leno first got his show on NBC he knew that they weren't going to get big ratings. He said that they were going to beat CSI and shows like that when they'd run repeats. Howard said that CSI had a repeat this week and it beat Jay Leno. Howard said it not only beat him but it was Leno's lowest ratings he's ever had. Howard said it was lower than the 1.5 he had recently. Howard said Leno probably can't wait for them to repeat the repeats.
Howard said there's a guy in TV who probably doesn't want his name mentioned. He said the guy wrote to him and told him that Jay said this stuff about CSI. He read that note and the guy told him that it was his lowest ratings ever and he probably didn't have any big guests on the show. Howard said this guy thinks that this could be the biggest failure in TV ever.
Howard said the story is interesting because Leno was a huge thing in late night and he left his show to do this other show and it's failing. Robin said that Jay doesn't listen to anyone and he just reads his cards and doesn't follow up on questions. Robin said it's like he's not even there. Robin said Jay won't even listen to what people are saying and he just moves on to the next segment. Howard said that's the real Jay and he's just not interested in people.
Howard said Jay really isn't good and people are starting to see that. Robin said he had Greg Allman on the show and he didn't interview the guy, he just thanked him for playing on the show with some country guy. Artie said that Greg Allman wouldn't say much anyway.
Howard said people are seeing Jay in a new light. He said it's one of the biggest mistakes in broadcasting history. He said that this Green Car thing is really dumb too. He said they had Rush Limbaugh driving in it and it was boring.
Eric said Robin lied about Kurt Angle writing to her and that was a lie. He said Kurt told him that. Robin said that's not true either.
Eric said he was upset with Artie for not doing his show out in San Diego too. Howard said he thinks that Eric is the most selfish person ever. He said that Artie told him he could do stand-up at a show. Artie said it's n to just him, the other guys like Bob Levy, would let him to do it too.
Artie said he had to cut back on the amount of shows he was doing so he can stay healthy. Artie said that he's trying to stay healthy. He said being out on the road isn't great for him right now. Howard said Artie wants to heal but then Eric starts tweeting and complaining about it. He said that he was brutal about it.
Artie said Eric was at a show a couple of years ago and he had a great time there. He said he got a large boo from the crowd but Eric got to speak and he's probably improved since then. Artie said he will help Eric out how he can but other guys can help too. Howard said Eric could do it at a local club too. Robin told him that's what he should do.
Eric said he's not selfish about this. He said that the money was going to help him with Christmas presents this year. Robin said that's selfish because he's worried about his standing in his family. Artie asked how much money he said he was going to give him. Eric said they didn't discuss it. Artie said it wouldn't have been more than a couple hundred bucks. Howard asked if he was expecting thousands. Eric said he didn't know.
Howard said Eric wouldn't last more than 13 seconds on stage. Eric said he was talking to management about that. He said they were also talking about flying him in or driving him up to San Diego. Artie had no idea that was going on.
Artie said he has some gigs on the East Coast that he can do but he can't be going out on the road that much right now. Howard said Eric is going to be on stage for like 10 seconds and that's about all he'll last. Robin said that he should be just going out and finding a gig to do on his own instead of waiting for Artie to help him out.
Artie said that he's had guys on the show like High Pitch Eric and Jeff the Drunk and they last for about 30 seconds. Howard asked Eric what he's going to say on stage. Eric said he was going to write some stuff with a friend of the producer of the show.
Artie said he would let him do some stand-up but it's not that easy. He said that people want to get up there and do it but it's not that easy. He said you have to say something. Howard said that you do have to grab the audience and he might not be able to do that. Robin asked Eric if he's ever been told he's funny. Eric said he has but he didn't remember who told him. Robin asked Eric what he was doing at the time he was told he was funny. Eric didn't remember that either.
Rich from the Bunny Ranch called in and said that Eric has been calling and asking to come back to the Bunny Ranch. Rich said he flew to California to talk to Eric and he blew him off. He said that Robin was adamant about not letting Eric come back. He said that they don't want him back since he treated him that way so they're going to extend the invitation to Medicated Pete instead.
Eric was still blaming Robin for getting him banned but it was actually the way Eric treated Rich that time he went out to visit him. Eric said he didn't know how his parents were going to react to ''someone like that'' so he didn't want to let him in. Rich said that he's going to extend the offers to someone else because of that treatment.
Howard said he can see why Eric was nervous about Rich saying something inappropriate around his parents. Artie said that he's going to let Medicated Pete do 5 minutes of stand-up then. He said he's going to take the hint from Rich and do that for Pete.
Robin said Eric needs to find some new friends to piss off. Howard said Rich is the guy who waxed his daughter's ass on the show. He said maybe that's why Eric is so scared of him.
Howard let Eric go after that and told him that maybe Artie will put him on a show. Howard asked Eric if he was mad at Rich for letting Medicated Pete go out to the Bunny Ranch. Eric said that was annoying.
Pete came in and told Howard the hair thing was just something he came up with this morning. He said that he does it from time to time. He said it's a Redken product that's kind of gummy.
Howard asked him how many times he came at Rick's Cabaret. Pete said he's not sure how many times it was. He said it was hard to tell after a few times. Howard said they had pictures of him with some chicks there at Rick's. Howard said she was hot too. He asked if he just went berserk when that chick sat on him.
Scott came in and said that he asked Pete to help him out with the Stephen Stills thing. He said that he was going to leave early but when he came out later he saw that Pete was still there because he had just done the Wrap Up Show. Scott said that he's supposed to help him out with work and not appear on the Wrap Up Show.
Scott told Howard about some of the stuff that Pete does that he has to tell him is wrong. He said that he always wraps the cords of the headphones the wrong way and it ruins the cords. He said he asked him why he did that one day and he said that he just got confused. Pete said it was just a Tourettes moment for him.
Howard said Pete is just one backed up dude. He asked if he's all backed up now that he's been to Rick's. Pete said he is. Howard asked if he beat off when he got home after Rick's. Pete said he did after he got home. Pete said he did the 50 yard dash into his house.
Howard asked how many loads he blew when this hot chick was dancing for him. Pete said he wasn't sure how many it was. Robin said it might not be appropriate to go to Rick's now. Howard said he has to go there because he loves it. Howard said Pete should be limited to 3 loads. He said he has to have a 3 load limit.
Pete said that you can cross so many lines over there at Rick's that it's almost wrong. He said he had been to strip clubs before and he gets very child like when he goes. He said it's like a jungle gym full of chicks for him. Howard said he wasn't even playing with himself, he just blew a load. Pete said it just magically happened and more than once too. Howard said that shows how backed up he is. Howard said Pete is a special guy if he can blow a load just looking at a chick.
A caller said his name should be Cum Pants Pete. Wheels said it should be Premature Pete. Howard said he liked that one too.
Robin asked if he lasted longer with the hooker. Pete did and he said that when he gets the physical contact it must be different. Artie said it may have been her looks since she probably looked like CC Sebathia.
Howard tanked the guys at Rick's for helping Pete out. Artie said that he might have the record for ''most loads blown.'' Howard said he was wearing jeans and they had to have been stained up. Howard asked how he got into the house without his mom seeing his pants. He said he got home late so everyone was asleep.
Pete said he did take the train home so Howard asked if the people on the train saw his pants. Pete said he had his shirt covering it up. He said he didn't even know how many stains there were. Pete said he blew the loads in his underwear so Howard asked if it leaked through. He said he didn't know. Pete said he was going to the bathroom and prepared for the next round after getting the dances.
Howard asked how many rings he had on his jeans. Pete said he didn't analyze it. He said that he just went along with it. Artie said they had a guy at Scores who could get rid of anything like glitter and cum stains. He was in the bathroom and he'd help the guys out. Howard said he could probably help Pete out. Howard joked that he even had a mole removed in there.
Howard asked if there was a bathroom attendant there at Rick's. Pete said there was and the guy did seem kind of concerned for him. He said that the best part of being in the bathroom was the gum, mints and candy they had in there. He said he got a freshening up in there for the next girl. Howard said that you get that stuff for your wife so they don't smell anything on you.
Howard said he had to get to Hulk Hogan since he was there waiting. They talked about Hulk for a short time and how good of a guy he is. Artie said he got to hang with him down in Florida at a gig he did and he really is a nice guy. They had to go to break a short time later.
Howard came back and had Hulk Hogan come in. He said he's got a new book out called ''My Life Outside the Ring.''
hulk came in and told Howard how great Artie is as a comedian. Howard said he and Artie have some things in common. He said they both have depression. Howard asked him about sitting in his bathroom for two days incapacitated. Hulk said he has scoliosis and he just had surgery on it two weeks ago. He said he's in pain quite a bit.
Howard said he read that Hulk was considered a hippie in high school. Hulk was kind of a wimp in school and he hate confrontation. Hulk said that it made him nervous and he hated confrontation.
Howard said he watched Hulk's reality show and he provided everything for the family. He said he's not sure where Linda would have ended up without that. Howard said he reads that because of the divorce and the lawsuit that's been filed against him based on his son's accident is bankrupting him. Howard said he's not sure why a 17 year old is responsible for what their kids do at that age. Hulk said he signed off on his license so that makes him legally responsible. The car was in Hulk's name too. Howard said he doesn't get why he's bankrupted because of what his son did. Robin said that's the law.
Howard said they have to change the way things work then. He said that it wasn't Hulk driving the car. Howard asked Hulk if that eats him up. Hulk said it's in the middle of the case right now and it may have been different if it had been someone else. Hulk said that the other guy was living in their house so they didn't mean him any harm. Hulk said he didn't even know they were in the cars that day. Hulk told Howard about how the accident happened and how they were on their way out to dinner that night.
Howard said Hulk shouldn't be responsible in any way for what happened. Hulk said that's the law and they're trying to work it out. Howard said it should be the driver's responsibility, not Hulk's. Howard said even Dominic Barbara says he's right.
Dominic Barbara was on the phone and said that people are liable for some stuff but the owner of the car was hulk so that's why this is happening. Howard said he wasn't illegally driving though. Dominic said that the owner of the car is liable. He said that if it was in his son's name then they wouldn't be able to sue Hulk.
Howard thanked Dominic for calling in. He didn't want to continue with that. Hulk said he had no idea that the kids were taking separate cars that day. He said he thought they were driving his truck together. Hulk said that this was an accident and they're asking for $60 million from him. He said that the insurance will take care of some of it but not that much. Hulk said he can't talk about a lot of what's going on because they're in the middle of the case.
Hulk said that the lawyers for the plaintiffs are using his name on their web site and using that as promotion. He said they go on TV shows doing interviews and stuff.
Howard said he can see why Hulk was in the bathroom for 2 days. Hulk said it's not even that. He said it was other things that were getting to him. He said he was going to be on American Gladiators as the host and he was nervous about that. He said that they were betting the farm on him and things didn't work out very well with that. He said that he and Layla Ali were working together and they were relying on each other to help each other out.
Hulk said that he got a call from his lawyer the day they were shooting the show and he found out that his wife had filed for divorce. He said he loved Linda to death and he still loves her.
Howard said he read that Hulk was cheating on Linda once she left. Hulk said that Brooke really got upset with him about what was going on but they worked things out. He said that his marriage wasn't perfect and things were way unraveled. He said Linda was going out and doing her own thing and he wasn't getting much sex from her because she wasn't around. Hulk said that's when he did the cheating thing.
Hulk said Linda wanted to move back to California and he couldn't do that because most of the big venues for wrestling are on the East Coast. He said that Linda wasn't happy and she wanted to move home. He said that the divorce thing came out of the blue even though she had threatened it for 10 years or so.
Howard thought Hulk was miserable in his marriage and he was shocked to find out that he was that affected by it. He said that Hulk got married young and he figured that he had just gotten bored with the marriage thing. Howard said that wasn't the case. Hulk said he wanted to stay married but it was very tough.
Hulk said that Linda was doing nails when he met her. He said he had just gotten his Hulkamania thing rolling around that time. He said that she got tired of the wrestling lifestyle and he kept a house out in California so they could go there to relax.
Howard said most nail salon people don't get that kind of lifestyle and Hulk should ask her if she appreciates what he did for her. Hulk said they had kids and she wasn't happy with him working and busting his ass. Hulk said that he told her that he would support her in anything she wanted to do. He said he did everything he could to support her and told her to go out and make money on her own if she wanted to. He said it's really hard to make that kind of hustle and make it work.
Hulk said that he had a bunch of stuff going on at the time the divorce papers hit. He said that the tabloid things all started coming out around that time and it was all crazy stuff. He said he kept his mouth shut for like 4 months because he didn't want it to turn into a crazy divorce thing. He said it was going to make the Nick thing even worse. He said that Linda stuck to it and didn't back down. Hulk said that she went public with it all and he just wanted to keep it private. He said he was going to give her half of everything he had but it was like she was sabotaging his career. Hulk said his friends told him he had to say something or it was going to affect his career.
hulk said he went on and told Larry King his side of the story and people started to see there were two sides to the story. He said he went home one day and everything was gone from the house. He said the animals were gone, the kids were gone, the pictures were gone and it all hit him at once.
Hulk said he had a chair in his bathroom to sit in when he shaves. He said that he isn't able to stand for long so he has the chair in there. Hulk said he sat in the chair and just wondered how everything went so bad. He said he got in a bad place and said he's not even sure how the gun got into the bathroom. Hulk said he had the gun in the house for protection. He said he didn't want to be the Phil Hartman guy so he kept the gun in the house for his own protection. Hulk said he sat in that chair and started drinking Captain Morgan Rum and took some Xanax and just sat there forever. He said he played with the gun while he was sitting there. He said he was playing with the gun and the more drunk he got the more he wanted to end it. He got into a trance and he was hitting himself with the gun and things like that.
Hulk said he had a bunch of people calling him and they all knew how depressed he was. They were going to do an intervention with him. He said he was bullshitting people about it all but then Layla Ali called him and told him that they were all worried about him. Hulk said she was checking up on him because they all love him so much. He said she asked him to go to church with her and that snapped him out of it. Hulk said she had no agenda and there was something about her calling him that snapped him out of it. He said he packed his shit and got the hell out of the house.
Hulk said he cleared his head and figured that stuff didn't such as much as he thought. Hulk said he was so thrown into the negative vibration that he didn't realize that life is beautiful and life is good. He said that shit wasn't normal and he was caught up in it.
Hulk said he met Jennifer and that changed his life too. He said she's so positive in his life. He said that they don't watch anything negative on TV or anything like that.
Hulk said that his marriage was in a bad spot when he was starting the family reality TV show and he figured that he might be able to cheer her up by doing that show and maybe getting her to do an appearance. He said that it might help Brooke too. He said that Nick was just getting into his precision driving too so he thought it was going to be the glue to bring them all back together.
Hulk said that the TV show didn't work out and it made things even worse. Hulk said the production crew moved down there and then Linda split and disappeared. He said that VH1 got upset because they had all signed contracts. He said that Linda was just taking week after week off and didn't want to be there. Howard said you'd think she'd want the fame and fortune from that. Hulk said he thinks she got sick of the whole thing and wanted out.
Howard asked if Linda is happy now. Hulk said he hopes she is. Howard asked if he would take her back if she wanted to come back. Hulk said that he wouldn't.
Howard said that Hulk is in a relationship and this woman is giving him sex and she's not resentful of his career. Robin said that she's not yet. Howard asked if he would do another reality TV show. Hulk said that he's not sure about that. He still appears on Brooke's show and he does that because he'd do anything for her.
Hulk said Brooke loves Howard too. Howard said he likes her show. Hulk said he was joking around with her the other day and told her he heard that Howard was getting a divorce and Brooke got all excited. Howard said he'd love to date Brooke with Hulk's permission.
Howard talked to Hulk about Bubba the Love Sponge since they're very close. Bubba was up to almost 500 pounds at one point. Howard talked about the girlfriend Bubba had that used to wipe his ass for him because he wasn't able to do that himself.
Howard asked Hulk about some of the stuff in his book ''My Life Outside the Ring'' like the fact that his wife once called his daughter a ''cunt.'' Hulk said that's true. He said he was on a show last night and they asked him to retract something that he had said in his book. Hulk said that Linda loves her family but he can't retract stuff because it was the truth.
Robin asked Hulk if he really thinks he should be writing about some of that stuff in his book. Hulk told her that he was crushed by all of this stuff that was going on in his life and he's managed to survive it. He said that he anted to tell people that they can survive all of this stuff if he can. Howard said that Robin was asking about the stuff that he's writing about his wife. Robin said that the ''cunt'' thing may have happened just once. Hulk said that nothing happened just once. He said it was pretty consistent stuff.
Howard asked about Linda's claiming that he hit her for 20 years. Hulk said that didn't happen and he never would have gotten away with that for 20 years.
Hulk said that his father worked his ass off for his whole life and he never said a bad word about anyone. He said his father never said ''i love you'' to him either. He said that he and his dad did get close toward the end and they did tell each other they loved each other but it wasn't like that when he was growing up. Hulk said he's changed that and he tells his kids he loves them every time he talks to them.
Howard asked hulk how things would be if he didn't have money. Hulk said he's pretty resourceful. He said the movie The Wrestler shows what can happen to some wrestlers. He said there are ways to get back on your feet and keep that going. He said he's back on his feet and starting over now.
Howard asked if Hulk is on good terms with Vince. Hulk said he's going to work for TNA wrestling now so Vince may not be too happy about that. Hulk said that he's done this before and it should be okay. Hulk said he and Vince had been talking about doing some stuff and talking about merchandising and stuff. He said Vince had his opinion on what happened with his career and he's not ready to be put out to pasture.
Howard read some details about how Hulk was fired by Vince McMahon Sr. when he got the role in Rocky 3. Hulk said that Vince's dad was the best and the Rocky movie was shot in 79 or 80 and the wrestling mindset wasn't the same back then. He said you had to be loyal to the sport and you denied it being fake and all of that. He said they never had anyone do the media crossover back then. Hulk said it matters now but back then it was different.
Hulk said that he was promised to another wrestling thing and then he got the call from Sylvester Stallone to do that movie. He said that he was told that if he did the movie he would never work there again and that's the choice he had to make.
Howard asked Hulk about the way Vince Sr. must have felt threatened by the movie thing. Hulk said it wasn't like that. He said that no one had ever done that before so it was all new to them.
Howard said he didn't know about Hulk's brother dying of a cocaine overdose. Hulk said he was also into pain killers. Howard said that Hulk loaned his brother $5,000 and his brother went out and used that money on drugs. Hulk said he was behind on his house payment and he asked his brother to come with him to hang out and get away from the ex-wife and everything else. He said he split and went to the Cow Palace and he got a note from the promoter telling him to call this number. He said he called the number and found out his brother was dead. Howard said he can't blame himself for that. Hulk said he should have taken him with him. Howard said he can't blame himself though because he was a grown man.
Howard said there's a lot of sadness in his life. He said he gets why he was in the bathroom that day. Hulk said that had nothing to do with it though. It was other stuff. Howard said it all added up though.
Hulk said that he has kind of found religion in the past few years. He said he's been praying to be happy and he doesn't want to go into all of the books he's read but he did mention a few. Hulk said he loves reading and when he did snap out of all of this he wanted to be happy and found that being happy can attract happiness. He said that there are certain laws that always happen like the law of gravity. He said that the law of attraction is another one that always works. He said that like attracts like and thoughts become things. He said that's a natural law that God gave us. He said that you ask and you shall receive.
Hulk said he woke up and realized he had to be happy to attract more happiness. He said he switched gears and changed his thinking. He said that it worked for him. Hulk said he wanted to help people and he started receiving things. He said that things get so good that the lines get blurry between it all. Hulk said he's very positive now and it's so much better than being negative.
Howard asked what Hulk had tattooed on his arm. hulk said it was more religious stuff. He said that it says ''I am that, I am.'' He explained how that all came about and how everyone has God in them and he's everywhere so that's what that is.
Howard asked if he's seen Linda lately. Hulk said he just saw her at a deposition. He said that he didn't hug her or anything. He said she was at the end of the table and she looked tired. Hulk said he just wanted to get out of that deposition so he could fly to New York.
Howard asked Hulk if he's going to marry Jennifer. Hulk said that he's had a tough time with marriage so he's not sure. Howard said he should take his time with that then.
Howard said Hulk has said a lot and he gave him a plug for his book ''My Life Outside the Ring'' and said he thinks that the book will do well. Howard said he wishes him luck with all of that. Howard said he hopes he never ends up in that low place again.
Howard said he had a 9 year old kid there to meet him. It was Ronnie's grandson Brian. Howard said that Ronnie asked to bring the kid in today and he was pretty sure that Hulk wouldn't give a shit. Brian came in and Hulk said hi to him and saw that he had a Hulk doll. Howard asked Brian when he became a fan. Brian said ''When I was 9.'' Howard asked why he was such a fan. He didn't know. Howard asked if he wanted to have the big muscles like Hulk. Brian wasn't saying much.
Howard asked Brian if he was upset when Hulk got divorced from Linda. Robin told him that he was bad. Howard said he hopes this makes Brian's day. Hulk offered to sign his doll for him. Howard said Hulk isn't usually this nice to kids. He's just on camera and he's trying to look nice.
Hulk told Brian that he can do anything in his life that he wants. He said that's what he discovered in his life. He told him to keep taking his vitamins and keep going to school and he'd be fine. Howard said that Brian's dad was in there too and Howard said that's the guy who really wants to sit on his lap. Howard wrapped up and went to break a short time later.
Howard came back and talked about Hulk Hogan being kind of sad today. He took a call from a guy who said that it was a touching interview. The caller also asked if he could play a game. Howard said he had a game but he lost the paperwork for the money. Gary said that he put it in there.
Gary came in and told Howard he tried to call Howard's dad and he was having some issues with that. Howard said he feels so much pressure calling them himself that he knows what it's like. Howard talked about how tough it can be with them.
Howard said he had a homeless game to play. Gary said that it might be an Amish game. It turned out to be an Amish game with Wolfie asking the questions. The caller had to guess if the guy was going to know the answers or not. He only played one question with the guy. It was ''Who is Oprah Winfrey?'' The Amish guy said ''A movie star'' and the caller guessed right... kind of. It was close enough. Howard played a few more questions after that. Here they are:
Howard read some other stuff about Dave and Regis. He said that Regis suggested that Dave have another kid with his wife. Howard said that he can imagine Dave coming out and saying that she's pregnant again. Howard said he'd love for Regis to give him all kinds of weird advice like wearing an eye patch and things like that to keep people from thinking about the scandal.
Gary said that Howard's dad just returned his call. Howard got his dad, Ben, on the phone. Howard brought up the eating regimen they have and how odd he finds that. Ben didn't think it was that unusual. He said he has 3 breakfasts he eats in sequence. He has oatmeal, rice and a cereal he likes. He said that he eats them day by day.
Howard asked Ben what kind of cereal he eats. He had a whole wheat thing he likes and a honey thing. Honey nut Cheerios. Ben said he had a cold cereal this morning. He keeps a tag on them and he does that so he knows if he should eat cold or hot that morning. He said he has a hot one and then a cold one. Robin said she was confused by this.
Howard asked why he has to tag them. Ben said he eats a cold cereal one day and then a hot one the next. He wants to keep them in order. Howard asked what he would do if he felt like eating a cold cereal and it was a hot cereal day. Ben said he can't because he has a compulsion to eat it in order. Robin said this is an OCD thing.
Ben said he likes to stick to his order of eating because he wants to eat what's good for him. He said he doesn't do the same thing for lunch. He said that he has a way of making his sardine sandwiches when he eats them though.
Ben said that he goes out with Howard's mom to eat lunch often so he doesn't have a set schedule. Ben said he brings his own fruit to the yogurt shop they go to. He has been bringing blueberries and bananas but then he stopped buying blueberries because they're too expensive. Ben said that they bring the blueberries in all year round now and it wasn't like that years ago.
Robin asked about the dinner thing since they go out to eat every night. Ben said that they do that. Howard said his mother wants to eat whatever she wants but his dad described to Beth how they have set days for every restaurant. Monday night is actually Italian food at a nice restaurant. Howard thought it was KFC earlier in the morning.
Ben said that he likes to have a set meal at the Italian place. He said he doesn't even look at the menu. Ben said he knows that they have there so he doesn't need the menu.
Ben said that Tuesday is KFC and they get grilled chicken there. He said he gets two breasts and it's always the same. He said he enjoys eating it. He said Ray has three thighs. He said they get corn on the cob and cole slaw. Then on Wednesday they go to a Greek restaurant. Ben said that he likes to have soup there. Howard asked if they ever change the nights they go. Ben said there is no reason to change it. He laughed at himself over that stuff.
Howard asked where they go on Thursday. Ben said they go to a diner on Thursday. He said he doesn't look at the menu there either. He said he knows what he wants and he orders it. Howard asked Ben why he didn't let him look at the menu when he was a kid. Ben didn't really answer.
Ben said that on Friday they go to another restaurant and they have the same thing there too. Ben said he only gets fish at this place on Friday so they know him there. He said that they know him at KFC pretty well too. He said they have new kids there all the time though. Ben said that at the diner they know him too but he still has to give his order.
Howard asked Ben if his mom gets the same thing every time. Ben said that you get to know your favorites and you just get that. He said it's the same thing over and over. Robin asked if they ever go to Mexican or anything. Ben said no.
Ben told Howard that he used to go to the diner in Freeport to get the Colonel Sanders chicken about 40 years ago. He said he stopped eating that for a while but tried the new grilled chicken and it's very good.
Howard asked Ben about eating sardines for lunch during the week. Ben said they're delicious and he loves eating them. Ben said that Beth asked him if he eats between breakfast and lunch. Ben said that he doesn't get hungry between then. He said he never eats after dinner either. Ben said that's nonsense to get up at midnight to eat.
Howard said Beth had the time of her life talking to his dad. Ben said she was asking so he told her about it all. He said he had a good time talking to her.
Howard said he took over and ordered for his father at dinner the other night. Ben said he loved the food but he felt terrible eating desert. He said he did like it but he doesn't want to eat so much.
Howard thanked his dad for clearing all of that up for them. He also brought up how his father likes to go out and buy his newspaper instead of having it delivered. Ben said he's been reading the NY Times forever and he hopes that it doesn't go away. He said if he misses a day then he goes into withdrawals. He said the paper is now $2 and he understands why they have to charge so much. Circulation is down so they have to charge more for it.
Howard said his dad doesn't like to have the paper delivered because he doesn't want it delivered late. Ben said he goes out shopping very early in the morning so he just picks it up then.
Howard asked his dad what he thinks about the David Letterman thing. Ben said that you don't eat where you shit. He said that this Steve Phillips is also an idiot and suggested that he go out and spend $10 on a hooker instead. Artie laughed and said that it's not 10 bucks these days. Howard said it's been a long time since his dad has been to a whore house.
Ben said that you have to think about the consequences of what might happen. He said that these guys don't think about that. Robin said that some guys think that they're above the rules. Howard said you can laugh at his thoughts but his dad can control himself. Howard said his dad probably could have done that stuff too. Ben joked that they were waiting in line for him.
Howard asked his dad what was wrong with his voice. He had some phlegm. Ben said that he has a bit of a nasal drip now that he's older. He said he can't help it at 86 years old. Howard told his dad that he loves him and let him go a short time later. Howard said he had to take a break after that.
Howard came back and had Beetlejuice there. Howard said Beetlejuice has his own reality show on Howard TV. Howard said it's a big day for Beetle. Howard said he thinks he knows that little guy better than ever after seeing some of his show. Will came in and said that he's putting on his costume.
Beet came in a short time later and he was dressed as someone from some movie that Howard couldn't think of. It was a demented clown. Howard finally figured out it was from Spawn and he was playing the John Leguazamo character.
Beet had a mask on so it was hard to hear him. Howard asked him to take it off. Robin noticed that he gained some weight. Howard asked if it was the pressure of doing the TV show. Beet confirmed it was. He also said he gained 230 pounds.
Howard asked Beet how he came up with the idea to do the show. Beet said he has brains, man. Howard said they took Beet to the dentist in this reality show and they had to remove a lot of tartar from them. Beet doesn't have many left in his mouth though. The Howard TV guys had some video of that on the monitors as they were talking about it.
Howard said he liked hearing Beet in the car talking about how he hates the Jews. Beet said he really hates them and he learned that when he was a kid. Beet said he learned it like 10 years ago. Beet said he's not even sure why he hates them other than the fact that they're Jews.
Howard said Beet acts as a cop in one episode and he gets a spray tan in another one. Howard said Beet thought he was being attacked by the guy in the spray tan place.
Howard said his favorite episode is when he's training Bobby to be a boxer. Howard asked Beet about getting in the ring and telling him to keep his chin up and stuff like that. Beet also gets into a fight with Dominic the Midget in one episode. Howard asked why he was wearing nothing but a thong in that episode. Beet said he doesn't want to know why that was.
Howard said the show ''This is Beetle'' is very good and it premieres tomorrow, October 29th, on Howard TV. Howard said they air more episodes throughout the month of November. Howard said they have a lot going on in those episodes so they're jam packed.
Howard said they had a guy on the line who was flying a plane and needed help landing. Howard asked Beet to help him land it. Beetle said he could do that. Beetlejuice said he could help. Fred was doing a voice as the pilot and asked for Beet what to do. Beet threw some suggestions out there like ''stay straight'' and fly about 2000 miles. Beet told him to slow down a little bit. He told him to stay on the runway and he'd be alright. Then Fred said he just hit a duck. He asked if he should go left or right. Beet told him to make a right. Then Fred crashed. Howard said he thinks that he told him the wrong information and the guy died. Beet wasn't upset and said that it was just a stunt anyway. Beet said he tried but it wasn't his fault.
Robin said that the trash can Beet brought in there was moving. Howard asked what was in there. It turned out to be Dominic the Midget. Howard said he thought Beet didn't like him. Beet said that he did say it was garbage.
Howard said he had no idea Dominic was in there. Dominic said that's the only way they can keep him from shitting in Beetle's pants. Howard asked if that's true. Beetle said he don't shit in his pants.
Dominic had something for Howard. He said it was a diaper for Beetlejuice. Beet said that was Dominic's and not his. Howard asked why none of them have any teeth. Dominic said he's poor so he can't afford it.
Howard said they had some girls coming in to play a Beetlejuice Mismatch Game. Howard said they had some prize money to give away to the girls courtesy of the new show ''This is Beetle''
The girls came in and they were porn stars Priya and Mariah. Howard asked them about their careers and found out that Priya was from India and she was adopted. She said that she gets a lot of hate mail because porn was banned in India. She's been in the business for a year and has made 258 films already. Howard had some examples of her stuff and she had no idea what the names of her films were because she's been in so many. This was from ''Energetic Sex.'' Howard read that she likes to be spanked and she likes hot candle wax too. Howard said she doesn't like having sex with women though. Priya said that's not really true. She said she does girl/girl scenes with friends. She said doing girls is a mental thing so that's why she has to be friends.
Howard read that Priya can see ghosts and she goes to graveyards to see them. She said she has had that gift since she was a young child. She said she does see things and it's when she's very sober. She said she likes to stay fucked up so she doesn't have to see them. Priya said they scared her in the beginning but not so much now. Priya said that a graveyard is the safest place to be. Beet said that's not true and he's afraid to go into one.
Priya told Howard that she had sex the first time on a piano. She told that story but Howard cut her off and told her to just get naked.
Howard asked Priya if her parents don't know what she does for a living. She said that they don't know. She said they're like 70 years old and they're going to die so they'll never know. She said that they're very religious and no one would ever tell them that she's in porn because they'd ask why those people were even watching that shit.
Priya said she tells her parents that she's a bartender and a model. Howard asked if she was high on something. She said she wasn't but everyone else thought she was. She said she had a couple of drinks but that was it. Howard told Priya to take some clothes off while he talks to Mariah. She did that and Beet said he'd bang it all up.
Howard was losing control of the show with everyone talking at once. Howard tried to talk to Mariah about how long she's been in porn. She's been in it on and off for 11 years. Beetle liked her too and said he'd like to work it up for Howard.
Howard gave up on the interview and said he wanted to move on to the game. He had Priya take off the reset of her clothes so he could look at her before the game. She was rambling on and not getting her clothes off so Howard got back to Mariah.
Howard read that Mariah gives the best blow jobs. He asked where she learned. She said she thinks she was born with it. She said she could suck the cum right out of him. She said she'd do it with Howard even though he's married. She has a son who is 13 years old so Howard asked how she's going to break the news to her. Mariah said she's not sure yet. She said he thinks that she's in make up. She said she's only done about 50 guys in her career. She said she's done many of them multiple times.
Howard asked Mariah to take off her clothes so they can play the game. She said no and said that she wanted to talk more before taking her clothes off. Artie said that the game was ''shut the fuck up and take your clothes off.'' Mariah didn't like that. She insisted on talking to Howard more.
Howard asked Mariah some more questions and found out that she doesn't do interracial stuff on film. Mariah said that she got pregnant by a black guy and her father wasn't too happy about that. She said he loves him now though.
Priya said she has two black kids too. She said that one is 16 and one is 10. She was going nuts rambling on and on out loud while Mariah was trying to do her interview.
Priya thought they were going to be running in this competition but they were just going to play the Beetlejuice Mismatch Game. They just had to stand there. Howard was ready to give up on the game before it even began. Howard said they were all over the place and he didn't know what to do with them. He said he was just going to give them the money and give up.
Howard said they had $2,500 in prize money and it was courtesy of the This is Beetle show. you can find out more at ThisIsBeetle.com.
Howard had the girls make out a little bit. They got into it a little bit too much. Howard said they were going a little too far with one another. Howard said it was time to play the game but they were busy messing around with each other.
Howard got to the game and asked Priya to figure out if Beetle could match up ''Cats and ____'' Priya said no. She was right so she won $500 and a plug. Howard said you can win a date with Priya at NaughtyLottery.com. She said that she didn't know anything about banging the guy. She said that there are 50 other women there and the guy will get to meet all of them and they're not porn stars.
Howard moved on to Mariah next. He played a clip of Beet trying to fill in the blank in ''It's a matter of life and ____'' Mariah said she hopes he'll know it. Beet said ''death'' so she won too. Howard gave Mariah her $500 and said he was going to bail out of the game now. He couldn't take the madness in the studio. Howard said you can check out Mariah at MariahXXX.net. He also gave Priya another plug for ILovePriya.com. He tried to give everyone plugs but Mariah kept plugging her own site a few times.
Howard had some guys sitting in the studio today. He said that they wrote a letter to him that touched him and he had to have them in. This guy Kevin McFadden had some cancer that led to him losing his arm. He just had it removed in August. Kevin said he had a very large tumor and it was about to go into his lungs. He said that the rest of his family is healthy. Howard wondered why he would get it and said it must be the luck of the draw. Kevin said it's rare to have this form of cancer in his arm. He said it's usually in the leg or hip.
Kevin said he learned he was going to lose his arm and he had no time to think or cope before they took it off. He said it was his right arm too and he was a righty. Howard asked if he jerks off lefty now. He said he does but he has a girlfriend who helps him out.
Howard asked what they do with the arm when they remove it. He said they sent it out to a pathology lab to test it. He said friends told him to have it cremated and save it in a locket. Robin said she's not sure what they do with that stuff. She said she never thought about it. Kevin said he still feels the arm like it's there. He has phantom pain from that.
Kevin said he used to work with weights and stuff but he's not sure what he's going to be doing now. He said the company is going to keep him around though. Kevin said all of it was covered under his health insurance. Artie told Kevin he should have given his arm to Gary because maybe he could throw better.
Howard asked the guys what they think about the Yankees and Phillies World Series. They both said that it's going to be tough and it should go to 7 games. Robin read a story about how the Yankees win more when a democrat is President so they may win. Howard said it was Brian and Kevin who were sitting in with them today.
Steve said they also have a story about Howard Stearn the guy who is running for city Council down in North Carolina. He's got campaign signs up and they're very popular.
Steve said that Artie isn't running for mayor of Hoboken but there is a big push for people to write in his name. Howard said he thinks that Artie loves it and he'd be a great mayor there in Hoboken.
Steve said they have back stage audio of Artie at Jimmy Fallon's show in the news today too. Steve said that Ronnie is also celebrating his alleged 60th birthday today. Howard asked the guys if they think he's really 60. Artie didn't sound so sure but said he believes it.
Jon Hein came in with his Wrap Up Show preview next. He quickly ran down the stuff they'd be covering on today's show.
Howard said Robin was wearing a mini-skirt last night and she was looking really good. Howard said he had another song parody called ''Anal Pain'' which was about Robin's anal sex in San Francisco. Robin was laughing at that one.
Artie asked Howard to list the following guests in the order he'd like them on the show. He gave him The guy who had anal with Robin, the whore who ripped him off and Neil Young. Howard gave him the order in the same order that Artie gave them to him.
Robin read a story about a woman who wanted to have sex for tickets to the World Series. She was willing to offer many sex acts in exchange for the tickets. Artie said he saw a picture of her and it would be a big no for him.
Robin read some news about the World Series. That led to Howard saying he hasn't seen any games this season so far and he probably won't see any at all. Artie had some details about the Yankees and what he thinks will happen. He said that it should be a great series.
Howard said he got a note from Jerry O'Connell and he suggested that they team up Ronnie and JD on a radio show. Howard said he'd give them a show and the deal is done if they're willing to do that together. Howard asked JD if he would be willing to do that. JD and Ronnie came in and Ronnie went nuts about how the guys who are on the show with him don't call in to defend him. Ronnie said that he's not going to take all of the heat for this if they don't give him the support. JD asked if he's going to destroy them too or just him. Ronnie didn't say a word.
Robin said that Ronnie isn't destroying anyone and he keeps saying that he's not going to do anything to him to destroy him so it sounds like he's not doing anything. Ronnie said he's just not going to say what he's going to do.
Robin got back to her news and said that she was over at a church the other day and she was there for a fund Unicef raiser. She said there were a bunch of celebrities there and Vanessa Redgrave was doing a play there. She said that she had seen her do it on Broadway a couple of years ago and it was really great. She said that she's lost her own daughter so it was very brave of her to do that.
Howard took a call from a guy who said that he loves his dad and he thinks that he'd be great on Rosie O'Donnell's show. Howard said Rosie's dad on her show would be ever better.
Wayne Segal called in and said that JD's mom went as far away from JD as she could to get away from him. Wayne didn't like that he was in charge of canceling that show. Wayne said he's accepted the fact that they lost the show and they know they have to go with that final decision. Wayne was one of the guys on the Auto Show. Wayne wanted to use JD as a way to make the show better but Howard said he'll have to get back to him on that.
Robin got back to her news and read a story about fetishes. She asked Howard if he thinks there are a lot of guys into fetishes there. Howard said Sal is into that pee porn stuff and Richard seems to be into cock. King of All Blacks is into feet. Artie did his impression of King for a few minutes talking about feet in that creepy way King does it. Robin said they did a study that found that most fetishes are about body parts. They also find that people have hair and leather fetishes. Artie talked about that stuff as if he were King of All Blacks. Robin said that 2 to 4 percent of the male population have a fetish. Robin said she thought it would be much higher than that. She said that the fetishes are started when people are children.
Robin read a story about the two pilots who were relieved of their licenses after overshooting their destination by an hour. Robin said that they're saying that they violated their cockpit regulations so they took their licenses away.
Howard tried to take some calls but no one was answering him. Artie, as King of All Blacks, was goofing on the guys like they had some shitty phones that he'd goof on.
Robin read about Andre Agassi who has a new book coming out soon. Howard read that he did Crystal Meth one time and wrote about it in his book. Howard said he's never done that stuff. Artie said he never did it because he was afraid of it. Howard read that it made Andre want to clean his house. He said he's not sure he'd want to do a drug that makes you want to clean your house.
Howard was wearing some jeans he hated so he showed the guys and Artie went off on him like he was still King of All Blacks. Howard said they look like old man jeans. Robin said they really were bad. Robin said they looked like PJs and they were too soft. Howard said they're called AG jeans or something. Artie said they looked fine to him. Robin said they don't look like jeans, they look like pajamas. Artie said they look like jeans to him. Howard said he's going to throw them out.
Ralph called in and said they might look bad because he lost weight. Ralph was also asking if the friend of the guy who lost his arm is happy that he lost it because it got him on the Howard Stern Show. The friend said that was pretty gay. He said he's been his best friend for 14 years and he's not happy about him losing his arm.
Robin read a story about a guy who was convicted of drowning his wife in a SCUBA diving accident. He was a trained diver and he didn't go down to save her when she saw that she was drowning. They found the guy guilty in the case. Howard said that the guy should have taken her on some trip to do something he wasn't good at. Artie said that it would be insanely simple to kill someone doing that SCUBA diving. Artie said he was on a boat while Dana was out doing it and the guy on the boat told him he was boring.
Robin read that Ford has been found to have world class reliability according to Consumer Reports. They say that they've stepped up their game over the past few years.
Robin read about the guy who was convicted of some sniper attacks in Washington DC. He's going to be put to death next month. Howard said they should kill him, wake him up and kill him again. Robin said they're going to kill him by lethal injection. Robin had some audio of the guy's wife asking to see him before he dies. She's trying to get her kids to see him one last time. He should be put to death on the night of November 10th. Howard said he would go to watch if he was one of the families.
Howard asked Kevin about how hard it was losing his right arm and learning to wipe with his left. Kevin said it wasn't so hard. He said that jerking off was harder.
Robin read that Bill Cosby won the Mark Twain award recently. She had some details about who was there for the event.
Robin read that Michael Jackson should have a number one album now that his movie is coming out. Jennifer Love Hewitt commented on the movie they had audio of that. She was very happy sounding in the clip. Robin said they're predicting that it might be the highest grossing concert film of all time. Right now it's Miley Cyrus. Artie wanted to go jump off the Chrysler building when he heard that.
Robin said Donny and Marie are recording a new album. Howard said Beth saw them in Vegas and enjoyed their show.
Robin read that Sarah Palin got a $1 million retainer to write her book ''Going Rogue.'' Howard asked about an email they got about the meaning of Rogue and how it means the person is a cheater and things like that. Howard gave up on that quickly after Benjy gave him the gist of the email.
Robin read some news about Jack Lalane getting his own day in Los Angeles. Robin had some audio of Jack thanking them for the award in Los Angeles. Howard said his workout outfits were really weird. Howard said he had big shoulder pads and looked like he was in Devo.
Robin had some audio of John Woo talking about how he changed his movie for the American audience. Howard played some of that and talked about how weird those Japanese movies can be. He said it's always guys who hate each other for no apparent reason. They had to end the show a short time later. Howard said goodbye to Kevin and Brian and ended the show around 11:00am.
Gary said Howard and Hulk talked about the whole marriage thing and it sounded like it was the opposite of what they thought it was. They went through some really tough times according to Hulk. Jon wondered how long it had been unraveling. Will said that they weren't talking much outside of the show when they were doing the reality show.
Will said that Hulk also talked about stuff in the book about how Linda didn't seem so honest shortly after they got married. He said they talked a little bit about the show and how Linda wasn't really into it at the time. He said it was tough for the Osbournes too when they were doing their show.
Jon took a call from a guy who said that he thought Howard took it easy on Hulk today. He said Howard seemed to glaze over a lot of stuff. He said he should have asked him more about where the depression came from. Gary said that he thinks that he went into that pretty deep.
The caller said that the attraction thing that Hulk was talking about kind of confused him. Benjy said he likes that kind of stuff and he likes hearing about it. Benjy said that he thinks that the guy who was in the studio who lost his arm must have been thinking bad thoughts and it brought on the cancer. Benjy said there was a film made about it.
A caller asked Gary why he has to pick on things that he doesn't like Gary said it's just his opinion. The caller said that Hulk was just an actor and he wasn't a real wrestler. Gary said that saying that he's one of the greats is just his opinion.
Ralph called in and said that he agrees with what Benjy was saying and when you think positive good things can happen to you. He said that you can make yourself sick and make bad things happen. He said if you're an asshole then you have asshole things happen to you. He said that it's the simple stuff that your mom taught you when you were 3. He said he tries to do that himself.
Jon brought up Hulk taking the movie role and being let go from the WWE. The guys talked about how different things were back then. They've changed their minds about the way wrestlers can move to other forms of media these days. They also passed a law in Jersey where they said they can't call wrestling a sport because it is scripted.
Gary said he thinks it's a traumatic birthday for Ronnie today too so that might be why he didn't come in to talk about it. Gary said that Ronnie is 60 but he looks good for his age. He said he's in good shape. Gary said that 40 was tough on him. He said he was depressed about it when he turned 40 and Howard noticed he was sad. Gary said he wanted to do stuff by 40 and he never did them but he wasn't able to remember what they were.
Gary said he's going to be 50 in a year and that's kind of a drag. Will said that he still has the whole world ahead of him and he's not worried about it.
Benjy said he did a Wii fitness test the other day and it told him he was 70 years old. Jason has been doing that stuff too but Will said that he should just go out and run. Gary said that there are a lot of ways to lose weight by working out in your house.
Ronnie came in and said that it really bothers him that he's 60. He said that it's rough on him. Ronnie knew that Will wanted to say something to him but Will said he's afraid that he's going to destroy his life. Ronnie said that he's out of his mind. He said he never threatened anyone's life either. He said he never did that with JD.
Ronnie said his grandson loved being there today. He said that he calls him ''pa'' and not grandpa or anything. He said that would bather him. He said he likes ''pa'' better.
Ronnie said that Sal and Richard were chasing him around the hall counting up his birthday and saying that he was 80 years old. Ronnie said Sal fell down on the floor pretending he was winded from counting up to 80.
Jon took a call from a guy who said he's sick of Ronnie talking about how he's going to destroy a kid who is just barely above being an intern there. He said he must have better things to think about. Ronnie said that's his mission in life now. The caller said he'd love to destroy his life too. He said that he would do that if he lived there in New York City. The caller said that Ronnie is a big man and it's a good thing he doesn't live there. The guy said he'd love to slap him around. Ronnie said he never threatened to slap anyone around and this caller is a big shot too calling in from Canada and threatening him.
The caller said that wrestling is real. He said that it's not that easy to do it. Gary said that he'd get hurt but it's not real. He said you can get hurt doing it but it's scripted. The caller said that he has 16 stitches in his head from doing it.
Benjy asked the guy if they decide who is going to win before the fight. The caller said it doesn't matter. He said it's live action theater, how about that? The guy told him he should try it out. Gary said he doesn't want to try it out because he doesn't enjoy it. Gary said he never said it wasn't a big money maker or anything. The guy said that it's very physical and it's not about winning or losing. Gary said it is about winning and losing and it'd decided in advance. The guy told Gary he's missing the point. Jon asked if he's a heel in the ring. He said that he is the heel and it comes natural to him. They had to go to break a short time later.
Jon and Gary talked a little bit about Beet trying to help land the plane too. Then they talked about the game that they played with the two porn stars today. They almost didn't get to the game.
Will said that the girls were the issue today. Gary said there are some people who assume that every inch of the studio is mic'd and that's why the one girl was running around going crazy. Gary said he was entertained by the girl running around and bending over and licking the other girl's boobs.
Will said that Howard got angry with him when he held the mic in front of that girl's mouth. He said that he never knows what he's doing wrong for Howard.
Jon took a call from a woman who said that she tells people to listen to Howard because he's not a pervert and he's good at interviewing but today it was different. She wondered why Howard couldn't handle those girls. Gary said that they were out of control. He said he can't control them all. She said that maybe they should have given them a Breathalyzer test or something before. Gary said if they did that they wouldn't have any guests.
Will brought up the fact that they had Dominic the Midget in the garbage can and how they weren't sure that he could breathe in the can. Will said he saw it wiggling once in a while so he was okay with it. He said that he was in there for a long time until Robin saw it wiggling. Gary said he was told that Howard knew he was in there. He said he asked them to put a note up to remind Howard because no one would leave it up to Beetlejuice to play a trick.
Jon took a call from a guy who said that the girls were probably up all night drinking so that's probably why they were unmanageable. Gary said he and Howard were talking about them after the interview and they were glad they weren't just dead. Gary said it's better to have too much energy than to have none.
Gary said after the segment the girls wouldn't leave and one of them got pissed at him when he showed her where the door was. Ronnie had to chest bump one of the girls to get her out of there. Gary said Ronnie may have had to drag the one out by her hair.
A caller said he loves Medicated Pete and he really thinks that he sounds a lot like Sam Kinison. Jon said they get calls about that every day but some people don't hear it. Jon said he doesn't hear it. Gary said he thinks more of Goldthwait than Kinison.
Another caller said they missed an opportunity to have Pete rubbing up against those girls and blowing a load in his pants. Gary said they really don't do that kind of thing there. The caller still thought they missed out on that.
Gary said he always thought Howard was exaggerating when he'd say that his father yelled at him for reading the NY Times the wrong way on the train when he was a kid. After today's call he understands what Howard had to go through.
Another caller said that Pete and Ronnie sound an awful lot alike when they speak because they always repeat after what people says to them. The guy said that they both do that. Gary said Pete talks a lot in general. Will said that one of them does it because he's retarded and the other one does it because he has Tourettes.
A caller said he thinks that Pete sounds like Mad Dog. None of the guys got that. Benjy said he reminds him of a kid he went to school with.
Jon brought up Eric the Midget and how Howard finally saw how selfish he is. Gary said that it may have been a voice mail that Eric left for them. Gary said that just because he's handicapped doesn't mean they should be excused from being selfish. He said that's what Howard's view was on the whole thing.
Will said he loves Eric even if he is selfish. Will said the whole thing with Artie is great and he loves hearing that play out.
Jon said that Eric has been banned from the Bunny Ranch and now Medicated Pete has an open invitation to go out there. Gary said that he's not sure why Eric goes to a place like that and thinks that he should be treated so well. Gary said that Eric must feel that going there is payment for the services they give him.
Will said he understands why Eric wouldn't want the guy from the Bunny Ranch coming to his house. Gary said that Eric has no manners and he could have done it in a different way.
A caller told Ronnie that he should lay off of JD because his show sucked. Jon said that they should lay off of Ronnie today too because it's his birthday. Gary said Ronnie still hasn't put that whole thing behind him and he's not done with the show like he claims he is.
Jon took one last call from a guy who said that he can't wait for the JD and Grandpa (Ronnie) Mund show. He said it's like a series now with them going off on one another. He said Ronnie is a bully to everyone. They had to end the show a short time later.
Howard started the show talking about his opening theme song which is him and Rob Zombie singing. Howard said he wished he had another chance to do that song. He said he could do much better.
Howard said Robin had no hair hanging in her face this morning. He said it was a new hairdo. Robin said she has changed it and it was just done yesterday. She said it could change tomorrow. Robin said her beautician made the decision to try it like that. She said she has to go to a beauty parlor that's for black women. She said that she can't go to a place that doesn't know what to do with a black woman's hair. Howard said every shop should know how to deal with all hair.
Howard asked if they sing when they cut her hair. Robin said they do not but they do have very animated conversations. Fred played some music in the background for what it might be like in the shop and played some buzzer sounds.
Howard asked about how they do Robin's hair and she told him how they have to twist it and put it into braids. She said it doesn't take that long. She said she went in at 3 and got out by 5:15 yesterday. She said she had to have it colored too so it wasn't just one thing. Howard seemed to think that was a long process. Robin said it is pretty long.
Artie said his hair cuts don't last longer than 10 minutes. Howard said Artie looks great for a 10 minute hair cut.
He asked Robin if she hates being in there so long. Robin said it's fine and she has a good time in there so it's not so bad. She said she brings things to read and talks to the people who work there. They talk about anything and everything.
Howard asked Robin if anyone there is confused that he's the guy who was involved with Anna Nicole Smith. Robin said they don't have that problem there.
Howard said he gets distracted when Robin has hair in her face. He likes this new cut. Robin said she was at the opera last night and a woman in the row said she loved her ''she yon'' or something like that. Robin said that it was some style of hair cut that she was referring to. Robin said this was a white woman who said it to her. She had no idea what she was talking about at first. Howard said she was probably testing her to see if she knew what it was. Howard said he knows people who like that and they just say stuff to test you out.
Howard asked Robin who she went to the opera with. Robin said it was Melissa. Howard said he figured it was her because that's the new team. Artie asked if Jared is working there at the opera. Robin just laughed. Howard said he doesn't get the whole opera thing. Robin said she doesn't get his relationship with Ralph.
Gary said Ross was at the World Series game last night and he was complaining about her being out at the opera. He said that he and Ross are going out to a concert tonight.
Artie said that he knows that there are teams that have lost the first two games and have gone on to win the series too. Artie said the old A-Rod was back last night and struck out 4 times. Howard said he may be burned out on Kate Hudson. He said they need to get a new girl in there for him.
Artie said that Jeter was great as always. He said he's going to the game tonight. Artie said that the pitcher on the Phillies yesterday pitched one of the best World Series games ever.
Gary said that they have Pedro Martinez pitching tonight and he used to be on the Mets. He said no one wanted him for a while and the Phillies picked him up and now he's pitching a World Series game. Robin wondered if it was the rain that didn't help the Yankees out last night. Howard said that wasn't it.
Howard said he wanted to move on since there wasn't much else to talk about with the World Series. Howard said it could send Artie over the edge again if they keep talking about the Yanks losing.
Howard said there are a slew of people out there like this Lamas family and the Antonio Sabato show. Howard said he found love on his show and that's like the worst influences out there. Howard said that it all started with Paris Hilton who is as bright as an eggplant. Howard said all of that stuff is a bad influence, not Miley Cyrus. Howard said a lot of these people get praise for being so dumb.
Howard took another call from a guy who asked if he has a personal trainer still. Howard said he does. The guy said Artie probably thinks that's gay. Artie said that's not true. Howard said his trainer really helped him out. He said there are a ton of these so-called ''personal trainers'' who are full of shit. Howard said they're guys who hang around the gym and don't really understand what it means for dweebs like him to work out. Howard said they try to kill you with their work outs. Howard said all they do is wreck you and that's not the way to do things. Howard said they cripple you and that's not the way to do things. Howard said he has to be kept in the game.
Howard said a lot of these guys are hacks and fakes. They get a hold of you that can keep you in bed for days. Howard said there is a science to it and you have to know who your customer is.
Howard said his trainer, Pat Minokia, has brought him up slowly and he's done it the right way. He said it's important to find someone who can motivate you in the right way. Howard also said they have to teach you how to do it on your own without the trainer there. Howard said that's what he's doing now and he just talks to Pat once in a while during the week.
The caller asked what Pat showed Howard to do with his ass. Howard said the best thing to do is squat. Robin said he still has a bad ass though so how is that the best exercise. Howard said it's a lot better than it was. Howard said he has a lot of problems back there from years of abuse. Howard said he didn't use it and it looked like the craters of the moon. Howard said it would be in a lot worse shape if he didn't work out. The caller asked if he does the one legged lunge on some special machine. Howard said he knows about that.
Howard said heads would roll if these things happened to other people who work there. Robin asked what it is about him that leads to this. Robin said that she's not sure why Oprah's picture is so prominent there. Howard said she hasn't brought in one subscriber. He said he doesn't see nay evidence of that. Howard said if they took that channel off the air tomorrow no one would complain.
Howard said he knows what's going on there and he has his ear to the ground. He said there was more controversy over Ronnie's show being canceled than there has been with Oprah's show. Howard said he loves working there and he'd like for them to tell him to continue. He said he has to talk to them about staying on but he has to figure out a different way of doing things. Howard said he had a certain incident that happened to him there that he can't talk about. He said that heads would have rolled if this had happened to certain other people. Howard said no one asked him if it upset him and it did. Howard said it makes him sad.
Howard said that he has spoken to his agent, Don, about this. He said that things have been taken care of and he loves the people there. He said that they're good folks. He said if the company came to him and asked him to stay, he would sit down and talk to them about it. Howard said it might not work for them though so he's not sure how it's going to work. Howard said it would be difficult to change it all. Howard said he's not going to talk about his plans right now though.
Howard said this is a sensitive subject around there. The caller wanted to know more about that. Howard said he likes people around there like Mel Karmazin. The caller said ''That's it?'' Howard just chuckled. Howard said Mel is a nice man and he's always loved that guy.
Howard said he was thinking about The Godfather II movie last night and couldn't think of the Jewish guy in the movie. He knew the scene and how great the guy was in the scene but the character's name didn't come to him. Howard recited some of that scene and talked about how great it was. Artie knew the scene and recited what Howard didn't know. They talked about this noise he'd make when he's speak. Fred played a snorting sound that Larry King made on his show that they pulled recently.
Howard said if that guy created that sound for that character, he's brilliant. Howard and Artie went on and on reciting lines from that scene.
Howard said that movie is the greatest movie ever made. Howard said his friend was asking him to name the best movie ever made in the last 10 years and he couldn't come up with anything. He said that the Godfather movies were the greatest movies of all time in his opinion. Howard said that's what he and his friend were talking about yesterday.
Robin said that Titanic was a great movie. Howard said that was a piece of shit. He said it was the Love Boat that sank. Howard said it was a good movie but it wasn't a great movie. He said he loves movies like the first Terminator movie and things like that.
Howard had a clip of Frankie Pantangelo from The Godfather II that he played. They had gotten some of the lines right.
Howard took a call from Pittsburgh Pete who said he's been working at a strip club out there and he ran across an old intern who worked there. Pete said that guy told him that they don't want Howard back at SIRIUS and he knows that from working there. He said this guy knows Sabean and Greenstein and they want everyone but Howard. They're going to keep everyone else and not Howard. Howard told Pete that he should keep working there because that is true. He said everyone but him will be re-signed. Howard said he hit the nail on the head. Howard said that Robin and Artie have already been signed. Howard said he's out. Pete said he heard there's another bankruptcy hearing coming up in February so that's why they're doing this. Howard said that he's absolutely right about this stuff. Howard was jerking Pete around of course.
Artie said that things are very awkward there because he was just signed on to stay and Howard wasn't. Howard said Artie doesn't even come to work all the time and he was signed on to stay. Pete said that the other rumor was that he was working on his contract. Howard said the other thing is that they think that Artie's Godfather impressions will bring in the ratings. Howard said he had to get out of the conversation and hung up on Pete.
Howard took another call from a guy who said he should retire next year because his looks are fading kind of fast. Howard said he didn't have looks. He said his looks faded before he was even born. Howard said when he was growing up he only looked good until he was about 13 or 14. Howard said his parents shouldn't have been allowed to breed. Howard said he got a nose while girls were getting tits.
The caller said that Howard is getting into the gobbler area with his neck and things like that. He said Howard should go out in style and get out before things get really bad. Howard said he might be right. Howard said he should tell Mel that he has the gobbler going and he has to get out. The caller told him to come in wearing the cowboy hat like Imus does. Howard said he's going to wear an astronaut outfit like the one they have on the moon landing. Artie said he's going to be the Indian from the Village People.
Howard said he knows he's old but he feels good. He said those two porn stars yesterday were telling him how good looking he was. He thinks that she may have been high on something but he's not sure about that. Howard said he knows it's just the money and the power though.
The caller said he loves the show and thinks it's the best it's ever been but he has to do the show without Howard TV. Howard said he could get around that doing the astronaut outfit. Howard told Gary to get him an outfit for next week. He said maybe one day he'll do the show in an astronaut costume and then one day he'll do it in black face. Howard said he could do some of the characters in the Village People on other days. Then he can do one day as a talking tree. Howard told Gary to work that out with Howard TV. The caller told him to dress up like Oprah and maybe he'll get some respect around there.
Howard had some money to give away so he let the caller play the Beetlejuice Mismatch game that they started yesterday. Howard said he had to guess if Beetle could match up the phrases they gave him. Here are the phrases and the answers:
Howard came back and talked about how they just don't make music like that anymore. He had Lisa G come in after that. Lisa came in with her Howard 100 news preview and said that they have an update from a doctor there at SIRIUS who says she's not happy that Robin hasn't had a mammogram in over 2 years. Robin said earlier this week that she hates getting them done because it hurts. Robin said she thinks that they're humiliating too. Lisa said they do hurt but it's not humiliating. She said she's not sure how they get it done if they have implants. Lisa said she gets it done every April. Howard wondered why they do it that way with technology the way it is now.
Lisa said that the doctor says that women should get one done every year after the age of 40. Howard said some women get their breasts lopped off if they have a history of cancer in their family. Fred said that sometimes that doesn't even work.
Lisa said that Bob Levy fought in a boxing match over the weekend. She said Bob boxed a guy 15 years younger but is lighter and shorter. Bob grew tired and lost the fight in a decision. Now he has to kiss and suck on the fatty areas on Al Rosenberg's neck on the Miserable Men Show this Sunday night. Howard said Al gets all kinds of great stuff on that show.
Lisa said there's a new cook book out that features a recipe from Richard Christy. He had a flirtini in there but he's made it a ''Viking Testicle'' to make it sound more masculine.
Howard read about some of the other characters in the movie. They have a bunch of big porn stars appearing in that one. Robin said she'll have to watch that one to see what Nick is up to.
Howard asked if Wanda was there yet. Gary said she wasn't. Howard said she was supposed to be there for 7. He said he was killing time waiting for her. Howard wondered if Nick Manning is going to keep the dropping loads thing in the Batman movie. Robin said that's what he's known for so you'd think he would.
Howard said in the paper today they're following Chastity Bono's transformation into a man. Howard said he's very happy for her. He said there's a picture of her in the Enquirer and she didn't look more manly. Howard said it looked like she had her breasts removed. Howard read the article about Chastity's transformation. The guys came in and told Howard that Wanda was there too.
Howard said Wanda is an attractive person and he's been told that he's better looking in person than she is on TV. He asked her if that's what people say to her. He said he found her very attractive this morning. She said she looks bigger on TV and HD is not her friend. Artie said that it's their enemy too.
Howard said he looks like he was smacked a yarmulke and smacked a brick in the face. Howard said he looks very Jewy in HD.
Howard said he was shocked to learn that Wanda was married to a man for 5 years. She said that's true. Howard said she had to know she was gay when she married that guy. Wanda said she knew something was going on but she thought it was something she wasn't supposed to do. She said it was hands off. Howard said he has a cousin who is gay and he knew early on. Wanda said she had a feeling too but she thought it was wrong.
Howard said that Wanda must have wanted to vomit when she was with the guy. She said that he wasn't her first or anything. Howard said that she had to get married, go on the honeymoon and have sex with the guy. She said she loved the guy and it wasn't like that. Howard said that she must have been thinking of women when she had sex. She said he had a nice ass so maybe she was thinking of a woman's ass.
Wanda said that as long as you have enough friction then something is going to happen. Howard said he knew a guy who had sex with a woman who was so dry that he ended up black and blue. Howard said they later found out hat she was a lesbian. Wanda said that she was able to get wet for the guys she was with. Howard said maybe she's bi. She said ''Uhhh... No.''
Howard said he saw Wanda on some Award show asking Bill Cosby a question and how he put her down by saying that they spoke English on his show, that's how they were successful. Wanda said that wasn't the right place to do it and she didn't even understand what he said at the time. She said she later saw it again and said that she's glad she didn't get it at the time because she would have said something to him that might have been bad.
Wanda said that Fat Albert wasn't in English so she's like ''what the fuck'' after Cosby said to her what he did. Howard said he never felt that Cosby was funny. He saw him live one time and he wasn't funny. Wanda said she thinks he's funny. She said that she saw him live and he was funny to her.
Howard asked Wanda about going into stand-up and asked if it blew her family's mind. She said she had a good government job and they did think she was nuts for leaving. Wanda said that she was the outspoken one in her family and she would get beatings for saying smart ass stuff. She said that she'd get spankings at times for saying the wrong thing.
Howard asked who it was doing the spanking. She said it was her mom and she'd get hit on the back of her legs. Wanda said she doesn't think she'd ever hit her kids. She said that they are white though so she might slip up once in a while. She was joking about that of course.
Wanda got married and Howard had no idea about that. He said that she must have kept that under the radar. Wanda said it might have been under his radar but it wasn't under everyone's. She said that they have kids now. She said she wasn't able to carry the kids herself so her wife did. She said that she would carry them but she has some problems down there so she wasn't able to do it.
Howard asked about how they went to the sperm bank and picked out a guy's sperm. They went with a white donor and Wanda said that she doesn't want the babies to look like ''them'' because they're two women and the kids would never look like them. Howard said he figures that they would do that. He said they could have had Chinese kids and really screwed up the whole thing. Wanda said that the kids are 6 months old and they have twins.
Howard asked Wanda if her parents are dealing with this well. She said that they're old and they don't get it. She said that they haven't seen the kids yet but they do want to. Howard said maybe they would have preferred that she have black kids.
Robin asked if her parents were at the wedding. Wanda said they didn't come. Howard said that's wrong. He said that's the worst part of all of this stuff. He said that people are too hung up on gay and straight. Howard said if his daughter married anyone, except a hatchet murderer, he'd be at their wedding.
Howard asked Wanda what she said to her parents when she asked them to go to their wedding. Wanda said that they had met her before so they knew her. Howard asked if they ever tried to hook her up with a man. She said that they didn't do that. Howard said it would have been funny if they had brought a guy to the wedding and tried to hook her up there.
Wanda said that she still checks in with her parents every week or so. Artie asked if her siblings were supportive. She said that none of her family were supportive. Artie said he would put on black face to go to that wedding. Howard said he would have shown up to support her. Wanda said that the 25th was their first anniversary and she's living a great life right now so she's not that upset about it.
Howard said he'd be honored to be a sperm donor if they ever need it again. Howard said he'd be happy to let them jerk him off.
Howard said it all comes down to this talk show Wanda has now. He asked her what the show is going to be like. She said she's going to do a monologue to start the show. Howard asked if she's going to do the Green Car Challenge. She said that's an option. Robin said that she was on Jay Leno's show and he really didn't listen to what she was saying. Wanda said that she and Jay have a shorthand and it may appear he's not listening but that's not it at all.
Robin said that they had her bowling for her plugs on that show. Wanda said that was her idea to do the bowling. She said she used to be pretty good at that before she had kids.
Howard asked about the rumor that there's a sex tape of them out there. She said that she'd love to see that because she's never taped it before. Wanda said that she needs some work and she doesn't have any stamina. She said that things don't last that long in bed. Howard said he figured that women would do stuff for hours. She said that she really doesn't have that much stamina herself. Howard sounded shocked by that.
Howard asked Wanda if her wife is satisfied. She said that she is very satisfied and very happy. Howard asked if they're back to doing things 4 or 5 times a week. She said that they are back to doing it a few times a week but she's not sure if it's 4 or 5 times. Wanda said that she's the one who likes to please. She said that she can still have an orgasm herself though. She said that she's the one who does it to her first.
Howard asked Wanda about her talk show and said that they need it to succeeded. Howard asked her about not doing the green car and if that's a mistake. Wanda said she's not really into the green car. Artie asked if she will copy all of the greats and have sex with her intern. Wanda just laughed. Wanda said that you should see these interns, she isn't having sex with them.
Howard asked Wanda about the band they're going to have. She said they're just going to have a Transvestite singing on the show. She said they don't have a budget for a band right now.
Howard asked if they have good money for her. She said that it's decent. She's doing 22 episodes and it's just on Saturday night. Howard said he figured it would be every day. Wanda said they're going to tape on Friday night and it will air on Saturday night. She said they'll have a bar there and they will be drinking. Howard asked what she likes to drink. She said she loves Petron Silver.
Howard said he heard that she was going to have a giant picture of Bill Cosby and she was going to defecate on it. She said that's the cold open to the show.
Wanda said she's going to have Keith Robinson on the show as her co-host/sidekick. Howard asked if he's going to sit on the couch. She said he's going to have a voice and an opinion on the show. She said they have a brother and sister like relationship so that's how that will work.
Wanda told Howard that she went to Adult-Con and tried to get them to go green. That's one of the bits she shot for the show. She said that it doesn't look like they're going to go green.
Howard asked Wanda about Letterman and what she thinks about that. Wanda said she's really not thinking about it at all. She said that she does Leno for the most part but she has nothing against Dave.
A caller asked Wanda if she's ever had any white man meat. Wanda said she has. She said that you have to try it all out to make sure. She said it was the same thing and same smelly balls. She said it's all the same. Wanda said that guys have to get a little purse for those things or something. Artie said there is no one that he understands more than a lesbian. Howard said it's no wonder they call it ''junk'' down there.
Another caller said that he thinks Wanda is very funny. He asked when they can expect Artie on the show doing shots. Howard said that Artie is sober so he won't be drinking. Wanda said that they need Artie on the show during sweeps.
Wanda said Artie was very funny on Jimmy Fallon earlier this week. She said he killed on there. Howard said they have to play some of those clips today. He said they haven't gotten to it yet.
Howard asked Wanda how big her boobs were while they were talking about what she should wear on her show. Wanda said they're actually DD-cups. Howard told her that Robin is a G-cup.
Howard asked Wanda if she's still doing comedy. She said that she's still out there doing that but not so much. She said that she's very busy with the Old Christine show and the talk show.
Artie said that Wanda has a great HBO special that's called ''Imma be Me'' and it's great. Howard asked if she uses the N-word in her act. She said she does and she don't get any grief over it. Howard said the N-word can be funny in some instances. Wanda said it can be and there are times it's the only word you can use.
Another caller asked if Wanda would let Robin lick her from twat to asshole. Howard said that was ridiculous but he did want to know the answer. Wanda said that she wouldn't do that to Robin. Howard asked Robin if she would want to do that. Robin said that she loves Wanda but she wouldn't do that.
Howard said that Robin has been accused of being gay. Wanda said she can tell that she's ''strictly dickly.'' She said she can tell. Howard said that Rosie O'Donnell was saying that Oprah Winfrey might be gay. Wanda said that was some source he had there. She didn't think that was the case.
Howard gave Wanda some more plugs and told her he hopes that her family can come around with her. Howard said if her show is a hit then maybe her parents will love her. She said they love her already. Howard said she has a lot on her mind but he wishes her the best of luck and he will watch the show. He told her ''Green Car... just think about it.'' Howard said he thinks that people want to see people driving around a track in an electric car. Howard ended up goofing on Leno's show and how he has 22 writers who should be able to come up with something new.
Howard asked Wanda what she was doing for the government. She said she just bought stuff while working for the NSA. She said that she was a contracting specialist. She said she bought equipment and stuff. Wanda said that she'd have blueprints sent to her and she had to send out the stuff to get bids.
The guys talked to Wanda about getting into trouble over a joke she made at some event she was at. She said that she made some comments about Rush Limbaugh being a terrorist and how he was so strung out on Oxy that he missed his flight. Robin wondered why they got so upset about that. Wanda said that she also said she hoped that his kidneys failed since Rush hoped that the president failed.
Howard said he's glad that Wanda isn't going to use her kids on her show. He said that's a good thing and what she should do is have desperate people come on the show and put their kids in dangerous situations. Howard said they could have people putting their kids in a barrel and sending them over Niagara Falls. Artie said that would be like putting a midget in a garbage can and leave him in the studio for 20 minutes.
Howard gave Wanda some more plugs and wrapped up the interview a short time later.
Howard came back and asked what song that was. Fred told him that it's the number 1 song right now. He said that Will Murray hates it. Howard cut it off and said he doesn't like it either.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he loved the Beetlejuice show on Howard TV. He said it was amazing TV. Howard said he knows the guys worked hard on that and they're having a party at Comix Comedy Club tonight. He said they're having a whole Beetlejuice thing there.
Howard said they have some great stuff with Beet in that series. The caller asked to play some of the Beetlejuice game but not even for money. Howard said Gary took it away so he didn't even have it to play. He wasn't sure he had money either. Gary said he did have some money.
Howard got the game back and played one question for the guy and said he could win $500 courtesy of Steven Singer Jewelers. Howard said they asked Beet ''The Killers of _____'' and they were looking for comedy. The caller said he would say no. He said he knows he works for them but he won't know. Howard played the clip and Beetle did know it was ''Comedy.''
Howard played another one where they asked ''Peanut butter and ____'' The caller said no but Beet knew it was Jelly. Howard said this guy blows. He gave him one more shot though. It was ''Yucko the _____'' and the caller guessed he would know it. Beet didn't know it. He said ''Yucko the shithead.'' Howard gave the guy the money anyway.
The caller told Howard that Ronnie is screwing him over for not ratting out the mole or the leak that told him about the Pete thing the other day. Howard said he is kind of bummed about that but Ronnie isn't going to rat out anyone. Howard said that means that the mole is still on the email list and that kind of pisses him off.
Ronnie came in and told Howard that there is a ''man code'' and that is to say that he's not going to rat someone out. Howard said if he has a leak like that he needs to know. Ronnie said that it's not a threat to Howard. Howard said he has someone on his list that gets to see his intimate thoughts on email and he could be going out and telling other people his ideas. Howard said he has to get him off the list if he's telling people secret information. Howard said Ronnie is his eyes and ears out there and he figured he would fill him in on something like that.
The caller said he gets why Ronnie doesn't want to rat someone out but it's Howard and Howard is the boss there. Ronnie said he's always been like that though. He won't rat someone out. Robin said that the mole won't own up to it and Ronnie is being disloyal to Howard. Ronnie said he's the most loyal person ever.
Howard asked Robin if she would tell him about a leak. Robin said that he would be the first person to know. Artie said he would tell Howard too. Howard said Ronnie doesn't get he man code actually. He almost went to another strip club when Lonnie left Scores. He said that Ronnie is being more loyal to the person he's protecting than he is to him. Fred told him that what he's doing is not right.
Artie said if he thought Howard wouldn't care about something like this he wouldn't bother telling him. Since it does bother him, then he should tell him who it is. Artie said he knows Ronnie is a stand up kind of guy though.
Fred said that if this was The Godfather then the person would be killed for not telling a secret like this. Ronnie must be scared of the leak. Ronnie said he's not scared of the leak. He said he's not nervous either. Howard said he must be scared of something. Artie asked if the leak has great abs. Ronnie just laughed.
Howard said that the leak has to be Tracy because she's the scariest one there. Howard said he really doesn't think that it's her though. Howard said he's really surprised that Ronnie didn't come to him and tell him who it was.
Robin asked if Ronnie promised that person anonymity. Ronnie said he didn't promise anyone anything. Howard said it only goes so far between him and Ronnie. He said he now understands where they're at with that. Howard said that he's the head of security and he stands between him and spies and he's keeping that quiet. Ronnie said that it's not in his own self interest like they're saying.
The caller said that Howard is hurt by this and he's fucking him over. The guy told him to man up and tell Howard who it was. Ronnie said he's sorry that it's bothering him but whatever. Howard said he doesn't even want to know at this point. He said it's embarrassing to him that he doesn't know who it is yet. Howard said it should have been taken care of already.
Fred told Ronnie that if the person makes another mistake and it hurts Howard then it's going to be Ronnie's fault. Ronnie said he's right about that. Artie said the person Howard has to take off of the ''guys'' email list is himself.
Robin said that Ronnie is willing to be that person to take the fall for the mole. Howard said Ronnie came to him when Benjy was running through the halls there. He said he didn't keep that secret. Ronnie said he might have to start yelling about that again.
Howard said it's Ronnie's job to tell him everything. He's security there and if he hires someone to replace Ronnie he's going to ask that person to tell him everything. Howard told Ronnie that he can do whatever. He said that he's obviously more loyal to that other person. Howard said he thought he was number 1 but now he sees that he must be number 2. Fred said that maybe he's even number 3. Howard asked Ronnie what number he is. Ronnie said he's number 1. Howard said he can't say that because if he was number 1 then he'd tell him who the leak was. Fred said that Ronnie is number 1, the mole is number 2 so Howard has to be number 3.
Fred played Sal and Richard saying that ''Howard is a sucker'' so Howard asked Ronnie to say it too. Ronnie asked Howard to just play the tapes of Scott out in Las Vegas instead. He said Scott is really upset that they haven't gotten to that yet. Howard had to go to break actually. He said he had Big Foot coming in and he apparently has a problem they have to talk about.
Howard came back and took a call from a guy who said they need a name change for Ronnie and it should be Fredo the Limo Driver. Howard said he's going to have each member of the staff come in and give permission to Ronnie to tell him who the mole is. He said the person who doesn't give permission is the rat.
Howard did a quick commercial for CougarLife.com after coming back from a commercial break. Why he didn't do it during the break wasn't clear.
After the commercial Howard said he was in the middle of his delicious lunch. He had rice with spinach, hummice and chicken. Howard said he was enjoying it but the show keeps interrupting his enjoyment.
Howard said it's sweeps time for TV and The Washington Post is reporting that a station down in Washington DC is going to have a woman do a self breast examination on TV. Howard said it's going to feature full nudity and it's a 28 year old woman doing it. Howard said it's probably a model-like woman. Howard said they're going to have close-ups and medium shots to show this being done and they don't need to do that. Howard said they could show it on a dude to show how to do it correctly. Howard said the FCC should shut down the TV station and fine them $80 billion. Howard said they fined CBS half a million dollars for showing a nipple so they have to fine this news station over this.
Howard said Jay Leno continues to do horribly with is ratings. Poor Conan is suffering from that too. Howard said that it's been a dramatic decline in ratings for The Tonight Show since Conan took over. Howard said they compared the ratings at this time last year to Conan's this year and the ratings are down overall. Howard said people aren't liking Conan which is a shame because he likes him. Howard said he apparently doesn't have the appeal that Jay Leno did at that time.
Artie said that Conan is 2 billion times funnier than Jay Leno is. He said he's not sure what the hell is wrong with Middle America.
Big Foot told Howard he brought in a hot blonde for him to meet today. Howard said he looked different to him. Big Foot said he lost a lot of weight. He said he brought in some clippers with him for Howard to groom his hair. Howard said he had no desire to do that.
Howard said Big Foot is in a relationship too. Big Foot said that it's a girl but she's just a friend. He said that he doesn't have a girlfriend. Howard asked who the girl was. Big Foot said that the girl he's been fucking is Tammy but she's just a part time girlfriend. He said she just stops in when she need screwing. He said the other girl is just a friend of his.
Howard said it seems like things are going good for him. Big Foot said he is happy right now. Big Foot said that the girl kind of found him and she likes to smoke weed with him. He said that he likes to go down on her deep and hard on her.
Howard asked Big Foot if he's sure that this woman is a woman because he heard that she's almost as tall as he is. Big Foot said he checked and she's definitely a woman.
Howard said Big Foot was suing the state of Vermont. He asked what was going on with that. Big Foot said that they were saying that he assaulted someone but all he did was shake a stick in the air. He said there is no lawsuit going on right now.
Howard dumped out of a name that Big Foot mentioned. Big Foot was throwing names out there about who was giving him problems with his car. Howard had to hit the delay a couple of times.
Howard asked Big Foot why people harass him. He said it's because he's so big and because he's on the Howard Stern Show. Robin asked if he's noisy in his town. Big Foot said he might have some noisy burps and stuff.
Howard said that Big Foot is due in court for spitting on someone. Big Foot said he caught that person trying to rip the door handle off his car so he spit on him. He said that person doesn't think he deserves the nice car he has. He said he has a 1993 Cadillac and people are jealous of the car.
Howard asked Big Foot if he thinks he's competent to stand trial. Big Foot said he doesn't think he is. He said he has some other charges against him too. He gave a cigarette to a 14 year old and got in trouble for that. He said that the 14 year old also wanted to show him her tits but he had to turn her down. He said he's not an ''alester'' like that.
Howard said that Big Foot isn't competent so he asked him what he's going to tell the courts. Big Foot said he's going to act as dumb as he can in court. He said he's seeing a psychiatrist and he's trying to find out if he's competent or not. Howard said he's pretty sure he stands a good chance of playing dumb. Big Foot said he's very dumb and he wouldn't give a 14 year old a cigarette if he wasn't dumb.
Big Foot asked about the leak problem they have there. Howard asked Big Foot if he would tell him if he knew about a leak. Big Foot said of course he would. He said that Ronnie isn't really his friend and he probably wants to stab him in the back. Howard said he's smarter than he is and he happens to be right about Ronnie.
Big Foot said Howard should hire him as his body guard. Ronnie came in and Big Foot went off on him about not telling him about the leak. Big Foot said he went to a ''praining school'' to teach him how to use his left and right hands. He meant ''training'' but he kept saying ''praining.'' Ronnie said that maybe Big Foot needs to take over.
Howard found out that Big Foot drove down there himself. He offered to show him his license and then offered Artie an extra one he had that he could borrow. Big Foot said he just needed to shave his head and he'd look just like the guy in the picture.
Howard said Big Foot is going to be appearing at the Recoup Lounge in Manhattan tonight at 8, 10 and 12. He also has a song out called ''Get Me Stoned.'' Howard said it sounds like they recorded this song over the phone but Big Foot said they recorded it in his apartment. Howard played the song and Big Foot was ''singing'' along with it. It was just him talking. Howard asked if he was in a cage or something. Big Foot said he was in his basement with the windows blocked. Howard said he can't hear him in the song and that's just not right.
Big Foot said they'd have to ask the guy who made the song why he did that. Big Foot said they have some other songs on the album too. Robin asked if he thinks it's a good record. Big Foot said it's a start.
Howard played a Baba Booey song parody and said that was a good song. Big Foot said that sounded like a girl singing.
Howard gave Big Foot some more plugs for the place he's appearing at. Big Foot said that they're giving him good money to appear there and they're selling tickets over the internet. Artie said he looks a lot like ZZ Top 40 years from now.
Howard had the guys bring in this girl who Big Foot claims is the hottest chick in Newport, Vermont. Her name was Jannon. She said that she's not the most beautiful. She said that she's 24 and she has 2 kids. One of them is 9. She said that she had her first at 15. Howard asked if Big Foot is the father. She said he's not. Jannon said that she and Big Foot are just friends. Howard said that Big Foot must be attracted to her. He said that he is. He said that he wanted to sleep with her last night.
Howard asked Jannon why she would put herself through this. Jannon said she bought him a sandwich one time when he was homeless. She said her kids don't come around him. She said she goes to see them by herself. Howard said he can imagine them down by a lake like in Frankenstein.
Howard asked Big Foot if he gets a boner when he hugs her. Big Foot said of course he does and he's sure Howard has one just looking at her. Howard said he was pleased with the fact that he was doing well. Other than the 3 court cases, things are looking up for him.
Big Foot said he had another friend there too. That was Mr. Domino. No one wanted to meet him. Howard said Jannon is going to be there with Big Foot at the shows he's doing at the Recoup Lounge.
Jannon said that she was in the car with him when they drove in and she was scared out of her mind. She said that they almost got into some accidents a few times. Howard said he'd rather drive with Artie Lange over Big Foot.
Howard thanked Big Foot and Jannon for coming in. Howard said he had to end this because he had a headache from it all.
Howard came back and said he couldn't believe it was Thursday already and it was almost November. Howard had Mike Walker on the phone too so he got to him. Mike is still at home and not out in California so he had to call in on the phone instead of the ISDN line. Mike said that he annoys the crap out of his wife while he's there. Everything he does is wrong there.
Howard had Mike get to his game so here's how it goes. Each week Mike Walker calls in with four gossip stories. Three of the stories are from his National Enquirer gossip column. One of the stories is false. Everyone tries to pick out the false story. The stories will appear in Mike's gossip column each week after he plays with Howard. Here are this week's stories:
Shuli said that Sid Rosenberg is being hounded by High Pitch Eric lately. Sid said that Eric is a fucking weirdo and he wishes that he'd leave him alone.
Shuli said Ross Zapin and Will Murray have been joking around with each other about the World Series and doing some odd stuff. Howard said he gets being a fan of a team but they should really grow up. Artie said that someone made a photoshop of A-Rod drinking a bottle of champagne into a big cock and the guy drinking cum. Artie told Will to keep that up, they've only won one game.
Shuli said that High Pitch Mike was out at the midnight showing of the new Michael Jackson movie. He admits that he broke down crying 10 minutes in.
Howard thanked Shuli for coming in and said that he's going to be a father soon. Howard said they must be paying him too much if he can afford that.
Jon Hein came in with his Wrap Up Show preview. He did the usual rundown of what they have to talk about on the show today. They talked about Big Foot and how bad he smelled today. Fred said he had his shirt up over his nose because it was so bad today. They also talked about Robin's new hair style for a short time. Howard said he could see what was going on. All of her hair was on top of her head. Robin said that's the way it is now but it won't be that way forever. Jon also mentioned the astronaut costume and Howard said that's actually going to happen next week.
Howard mentioned that Ralph is going to be sitting in for Mutt on Superfan Roundtable tonight at 7 on Howard 101. Ralph was on the phone to promote that. Ralph said they'll be talking about Eric the Midget tonight and about Howard's parents and who screwed Howard up the most. Ralph said they'll also be talking about Ronnie being disloyal. Ralph also mentioned that they have the Superfan Trivia contest going on.
Howard let Ralph go and mentioned they have a contest going on for Cougars. They're looking for women who are hot and between the ages of 35 and 50. You can enter by emailing the show at email@example.com
Robin started her news about the Philly woman who was offering sex for game tickets. She's saying that she wasn't offering sex in the ad. Howard said that an officer responded and that's when she offered the sex acts for the tickets.
Robin read that A-Rod and Kate Hudson have been telling their friends about their sex lives. They get very graphic and talk about it all day according to some.
Robin said that Corey Feldman and Susie Feldman are divorcing. Susie is seeking sole custody of their son. The guys spent a minute talking about that.
Robin read a story about a deputy attorney general from South Carolina who was found with an 18 year old girl from a strip club and some sex toys and Viagra. He was found in a cemetery with the girl.
Robin brought up Chastity Bono's sex change and how she's going to be interviewed on Entertainment Tonight. Howard had some audio of her new ''Chaz'' voice. He played that and Robin gave that a ''wow.'' Robin said the interview airs tonight and tomorrow night on E.T. Robin had some quotes from her saying that she was always a masculine woman. Robin said she didn't think that was true. She said she never seemed masculine to her.
Robin read that a severely obese family had their child taken away from them because of their obesity. They have six children and child protective services took them away because they felt they were being abused.
Howard said he's having a hard time calling Chastity Bono ''Chaz.'' He said that he's all for gay rights but he's having a hard time with that one. Robin said she slips once in a while too. Howard said that Chastity is going to be much more manly than she is now. He said that she's still working on that voice of her's. Howard said that she's going to look like Big Foot in 6 months. Artie did his impression of what she might be talking about when she becomes a full man. Artie said she was going to be out in Las Vegas fucking some whores and then framing a house in Newark. Howard also joked he heard that she's going to be a lumberjack in Alaska.
Robin read about a Florida man who was accused of killing a man. He's saying that he was too fat to do such a thing. He claims that he weighed 285 pounds and he wasn't able to pull off a crime like they claim he did.
Robin said that Forbes has come out with a list of dead celebrities and how much money they make. Michael Jackson made $90 million since his death. Robin read some of the other names on the list.
Howard said they should do a remake of an old movie where a guy tried to make Marilyn Monroe fall for him as a comedian. He said they should have Artie teaching Chastity Bono how to be a man. He said he has a suspicion that she's just a little too feminine and Artie needs to help her out. Howard said if she really knew what being a man was like she's probably change her mind after being with Artie.
Robin read more about the list of dead celebrities but Howard and Artie were still talking about what it would be like if Artie were teaching Chaz how to be a man.
Robin read some news about the new Michael Jackson movie and had some audio of some fans talking about it. Howard played a clip where a fan talked about how Michael was himself in the movie. Howard said whoever did that interview must work for a really shitty radio station because the audio was horrible.
Robin read some news about the wife of the DC sniper and how she was supposed to be the first target. She had some audio of that for Howard to play. The wife said that he threatened to kill her and not let her raise his kids. She also talked about how horrifying it was when she found out her husband was the sniper. Robin said that he was doing all of that to cover up her murder and he was eventually going to kill her. Howard said they should kill that guy immediately. Robin read about the kid who accompanied the sniper and how he's serving time without the chance of parole.
Robin read a story about a concert that's happening in the city with a bunch of big acts. She ran down the list while Howard and Artie were still doing the Chaz thing. Artie was doing her voice as if she had become a real man.
Robin read about the Phillies beating the Yankees last night. Robin had some details about the game that she went over. Artie added to that discussion but Howard asked him to do it as Chaz instead. Artie did that and cracked himself up so much it sounded like he was crying. He was having Chaz farting after having her finger pulled and things like that.
Robin had some audio of some Yankee fans reacting to their loss. The fans all said that they'll come back and win the series. Howard asked Artie more questions as Chaz and they were cracking each other up with jokes about her.
Robin read a story about something that's going on out in California where a group of guys raped a 15 year old girl. They said it could have been as many as 20 people. Robin had Howard play some audio of some news reports about that story. They say that the men took pictures and laughed as it was all going on.
Robin asked Howard if he's watching Survivor anymore. Howard said he's not watching a lot of stuff like Heroes and Survivor. Howard said they have too many heroes on Heroes and he didn't like it. He said he stopped watching Lost too. He said he couldn't take that either. Howard said he loves Survivor but he has to free up his life. Robin said that one guy almost died on the show. She said that Russell Swan has come out to talk about passing out on the show and how scary that was. She had some audio of the guy talking about what happened and how he didn't tell his wife to warn her how scary it really was. After hearing that Howard said he's burned out on all of the reality shows. He said he still likes Leave it to Lamas though.
Robin read that Levi Johnston is still out doing some interviews and he's claiming that he's keeping some secrets about the Palin family. She had some audio of him saying that he's going to leak more stuff about the family if they keep revealing stuff about him. Howard said he already did though. He said he had some audio of Levi talking about how they call their retarded kid ''the retarded baby.'' Howard said that sounds ridiculous but this kid's fame is going to go away and he'll keep coming up with more stuff. Robin said that's what he's claiming now.
Robin read some news about Britney Spears latest video. She had some audio of her song from the video.
Robin also had some audio of John Woo talking about his latest movie. The guys were making fun of the way he speaks and did impressions of him for a short time.
Robin read about how they were working on a new reality show with Octomom and Jon Gosslin. Howard said he's looking forward to anything with Octomom in it. They had to end the show after that. It was about 10:30am when they ended it.
Gary said that Jason wanted to use the list of people on that ''guys'' email list so they can dissect it on Superfan Roundtable. Gary said there are a lot of people saying they're not the mole but the list is getting smaller and smaller.
Jon said that Howard is thinking that he's not that high up on the list of people he's loyal to and it's starting to get to Ronnie. Ronnie is sticking to his guns and not coming out and telling Howard who it was.
Jon took a call from a guy who asked if Howard should be concerned about how many people have been creating their personalities off of the show. He said that even people like Ass Napkin Ed is using the show like that and they need to stop it. Gary asked why. He said he's not sure why it's a problem. The caller said he thinks that it hurts the show and the people aren't trying to make the show better overall. Gary and the caller went back and forth on the subject for a few minutes. Gary said he doesn't think that it's really hurting the show when Ronnie goes out and makes appearances at Rick's or Lisa G has her cookies. The caller said that the people they care about are Howard, Robin, Fred, Artie and Gary. He said that the other people don't need to be out there so much. He said Ronnie has been on way too much this week.
Jon said that it's all about what Howard wants to talk about. He said that Ronnie's persona helps the show out but maybe Lisa G's cookies don't. He said that maybe the caller's point applied more to Lisa than to Ronnie. The guy said that Ronnie needs to know that he needs to pull back on all of this. Gary asked how Ronnie knows when to pull back because he has no control over it. The caller said that Ronnie does have control over it. Gary didn't seem to think he did and went around in circles with the caller. Jon let the caller go after saying they kind of went around in circles with that conversation.
Another caller asked who they think the leak is. Gary laughed and said he has some thoughts. He said that Sal makes sense but then so does Jared. They threw out Tracy, Doug and some other names too. Benjy said that Ronnie gave a clue today and said that he didn't know if that person was in the building when they asked him about it. Benjy said it rules out a lot of people. They could have Jared and Tim back in if that's the case.
Jon said they don't know who it is because Ronnie isn't talking. Tim Sabean came in and pointed his finger at Benjy. Gary asked Tim if he thinks he knows who the leak is. Tim said he has it narrowed down to two people but he really doesn't know. He said he won't say who they are though.
Gary asked if they're letting Ronnie hang out in the wind. Tim said that whoever that person might be is in a position that's very tough. He said it may have been an innocent gesture that turned into something more.
Benjy asked if Tim saying it wasn't Jared puts the pressure on other people. Tim said that Jared isn't on that email list but he does read some of the email that comes through. Tim said that he's not spying on anyone.
Tim said if it was him he would come forward and just get it out of the way. He said that might have been easier in the week than it is now since it's turned into a bigger thing now. Gary and Tim said that it will come out eventually because it's not going away. Tim said he tells his kids all the time that they're either going to pay now or pay later. That person is going to pay later if they don't come out now.
Jon asked how Howard is going to handle the whole thing. Gary said it depends on who it is. Gary said that he thinks that if it were someone like Tracy or Tim then there would be more forgiveness. Tim said there would be doubt in his mind after that.
The caller asked what they think Howard will do with that person. Gary said Howard will be bothered by it and he may have a one on one conversation with that person off the air. He said he doesn't yell off the air a lot but he may take them aside and let them know that he has to be able to trust everyone there. Gary said if Howard can't trust that person it's going to be really tough for them. That person may be removed from the email list too.
Gary said there are some people that can be removed from the list without huge consequences. Gary said the longer the person waits the worse it's going to get.
A phone caller said it sounded like Howard was really upset not being able to trust someone to be loyal to him. He said that might hurt him even more than the person who leaked the information. Gary said that he's right about that and Howard might feel that a trust was broken. Gary said that the person may have done it innocently and this is going to keep growing and growing if they don't come forward.
The caller asked Gary what he would have done. Gary said he would have folded like a house of cards. Gary said if he was the leak he wouldn't be able to take the pressure of Howard talking about it all morning long.
Ronnie came in so the caller asked him why he didn't stand up for Howard. Ronnie said he doesn't know. He said he's got a lot going on with JD and the whole thing. He said he's just about ready to fold his cards and something is going to come to a head and he's not sure what's going to happen. Ronnie said it's turning into a big thing that he didn't expect with the disloyalty thing.
Ronnie said that he promised not to say anything to this person and he's not going to talk. Benjy was questioning him about that and Ronnie said he wasn't going to answer him. Jon asked Ronnie if he feels that he's being left out to hang in the wind. Ronnie said he doesn't know. He didn't seem to want to talk about it.
Gary asked Ronnie if he and the leak have had any discussion about this. Ronnie said he hasn't had any conversations about it.
Ralph called in and said that he saw the list of names on the email list and he didn't know some of the names. He said he feels bad for Ronnie but it's not that person's responsibility to come forward at this time. He said that it's up to Ronnie and it's obvious that person isn't going to come forward and they're a coward and a snake.
Benjy asked Ronnie if that person is a coward and a snake. Ronnie said ''I don't know.'' He said that it's just part of the deal after making a promise to someone.
Ronnie said he should have ratted the person out right away if he was going to do it at all. He said he can't do it now because it's gotten bad. Benjy asked if he feels that he's doing the wrong thing by revealing the person. Ronnie said he's just caught in the middle of the whole thing and that's where he's staying.
Ralph told Ronnie to go out this weekend and relax. He should go to a strip club. Ralph said he's pretty sure he knows who it is. He said that he's thought about who it is from the beginning and he's still thinking that it's that person.
A caller said that it's not helping Howard out by not telling him who this leak was. He said he's hurting the organization and he's putting himself in peril there. The caller asked if he could get some Mambo and some cookies. Ronnie told him to come on up.
Gary asked Ronnie if the person asked him not to say anything or is he doing it on his own. Ronnie said he made a promise. He said there is no difference if it was the man code or if they asked him not to say anything.
Benjy was trying to get info out of Ronnie but Ronnie asked him what it was he wanted out of him. Benjy said that he wanted to be his friend on Facebook. Ronnie said he doesn't even have a computer and he doesn't do email. That led to the guys talking to him about texting. Gary said that maybe someone at the phone company can get phone records from last week when Ronnie was finding out about the email list thing.
A caller asked Ronnie if he would give up the name if JD gave him his show back. Ronnie said that has nothing to do with the other thing and he's not going to reveal anything over that. Ronnie said he's done with that radio show.
The guys talked about the note that JD passed along to Howard that led to all of this. JD just forwarded an email to Howard about Pete being at Rick's with Ronnie and some of the guys thought that Howard might get upset about it. Gary said that Howard wasn't even mad at Ronnie yet when he spilled the whole story to Howard. Ronnie tried to get out in front of it and this is what happened. Ronnie said he never expected this to happen. He said he didn't think it was going to be a spy thing or anything like that. Ronnie said he thought he was going to get in trouble with H.R. over the Pete thing and he wanted to make sure it was all out in the open.
Jon took a call from a guy who asked Ronnie about his business and what he would do if one of his drivers tipped off a photographer to where Howard and Beth were going to dinner. He said that Ronnie would want to know about it. He said that it's a question of morality and he's being disloyal to Howard. The caller said that maybe it was an intern and maybe he's protecting someone who is below the people on the list. The guy said that the truth will set him free.
Benjy said the guy gave a great example and asked Ronnie what he would do. Ronnie said that the guy would probably be gone if he did something like that. Ronnie said he's not sure what he would do if someone there knew about what the other guy did and never told him about it. Ronnie said he didn't think that this was even a leak when it happened. He said he didn't think it was going to be a big deal when he brought it up. Gary said that Ronnie is getting the same amount of shit for something that turned out to be nothing.
Another caller said that Ronnie might be the stupidest guy in the office. He said Ronnie reacts to all of the questions they ask in a really weird way, especially Benjy's questions. Ronnie said he doesn't want to answer Benjy's questions because he's not a judge or anything. He said that he's just going to deal with things the way they are now and that's that.
Ronnie said he's not even sure if he's going to lose his job over this. He said Howard may feel he has to let him go over it. Jon said if he was the leak he'd come forward and make Ronnie stop taking all the lumps like he is now. He's being tortured by all of this. Ronnie said that person might feel that they're protecting themselves too and they might be scared for their job.
Jon took a call from a guy who said that they keep going back and forth calling him a rat and not being loyal. He said he wouldn't be ratting someone out by telling Howard this information. He said that his loyalty is with Howard and he should have told him. Ronnie said he never thought it was going to turn into this big thing. He said the person just gave him a head's up on the whole thing and how it might blow up in his face.
The guys told Ronnie that if the person who told him this information didn't think it was going to be a big deal then they wouldn't have asked Ronnie not to say anything. Ronnie said he doesn't know what the deal was with that.
Jon and Gary said that they'd like that person to step forward but not on the Wrap Up Show. Howard would get upset if that happened.
Jon took a call from a guy who said that he never tells people anything unless he's willing to let it come out. Gary said it's easy to say that but there are some things that you tell people and ask them not to say anything.
Benjy asked Ronnie if he would ask the mole if he could break his word and tell Howard. Ronnie didn't understand what he was asking. Gary said that maybe Ronnie could come out and say that he can't handle the pressure and he has to come out with the story. Ronnie said he would never do that to anyone.
Another caller said that Ronnie has been with Howard for many years and they know a lot about each other but this has to be hurting Howard a lot. He said it has to be crushing him. Ronnie said that he and Howard do have great conversations and they do know things about each other that they would never tell. He said he's pretty sure Howard would never tell any of his stories to anyone.
Jon took a call from a guy who said it's time for them to do some house cleaning on the staff. He said that they can't put him in a position like this. He said he's going to waste all of this energy on the small stuff when he doesn't need to. The guy said that they have to protect Howard.
Jon asked Gary if they're going to put Langford on this. Gary said that they don't need to do that. He figures that this is going to come out next week sometime. He said that all involved parties are going to see what the mood is on Monday and go from there.
Another caller said Ronnie should have come out with this right away on Monday. He said he shouldn't have kept it secret because that person is now watching him drown. Ronnie seemed to agree with him on that.
Ralph called back in and asked what the ''guys'' list is for. Gary said they have a small group of guys there that are on the list who talk about some show stuff that might need to stay between that group. They have a larger group called ''group'' that's for more people that might be a general show email list. Ralph asked why Joe Jordan needs to be on that list. Joe was in the studio and he said that they use that email to figure out the pictures they put up in the studio from day to day. Gary said he needs to be in the loop for what they're doing on the show every day.
Ralph said that John Hunnerlach is also on that list and maybe he doesn't need to be on it either. Ralph said he's not even on that list himself. Ralph said it would be funny if he was the rat.
Another caller asked if Ronnie would have the conversation off the air. Ronnie said he could do that but then he'd have to ask him not to tell anyone else. The caller said maybe Howard could do it off the air and not kill the person on the air. Gary said he had that conversation with Howard just one time. He said he asked Howard not to bust his balls about breaking up with that girl he made the tape for. He said Howard just told him to ''grow up.'' They had to go to break a short time later.
Will said that Ronnie will only protect important people around there. That's all he was going to say. Ronnie asked what that even means. Will said he thinks that if it was Jason, JD or him that said it, he would tell Howard right away. Ronnie said he doesn't know him very well.
A caller said he had a theory that the leak is Sal because they had a caller ask Ronnie to talk to the person and Ronnie said he didn't want to talk to that person that day. The caller also said that hey don't know if Sal is at work in his office back there and Ronnie didn't know if the person was at work. Gary said that's not true because Sal has to come through the main door to get in there and Ronnie would know.
The guys were saying that they're not so sure it's Sal. Gary said he's in the ''Sal is innocent'' group now after going through some investigation.
Ronnie asked who the ''important'' people are that he would protect. Will said he'd have to see the list but there are some people who are on there who are more important there who he would protect. Ronnie had to get running around that time.
Gary said he doesn't want to name the person but he thinks that it does merit a discussion. Benjy said that Doug Goodstein came out and denied it and he thinks that he'd be one who would come out and admit it if it was him. Gary asked Will if the person he's thinking it is has denied it. Will said he doesn't think so. Benjy asked will if he's scared of this person. Will said ''Yes!'' like he was terrified of the person.
A caller said that they have to lay off of Ronnie because he's a stand up guy and he's protecting this person like he should be. Gary said that's not true and they wouldn't let someone get away with stealing something there just because someone felt they should protect someone. The caller said it's not affecting the show in a negative way but some of the guys said that it is.
Gary said that Ronnie has done his job to protect the person and he's gone above and beyond to do that. He said it's time to come forward. Jon felt they were going around in a circle with the conversation so he wanted to move on to something else.
Jon asked Gary if he thinks that Big Foot is going to get into trouble for admitting he's going to act dumb in court. Gary said that he was thinking that but then he thought that maybe his lawyer would say that he is dumb because no smart person would go on radio and admit that they were going to act dumb in court.
The guys talked about the girl that came into the studio and how she has no idea what she's involved with. Gary said it reminds him of Frankenstein playing with the cut little girl who ends up dead.
Gary talked about how awful Big Foot smelled and how Artie was squirting Purell on the couch after he was sitting on it. Gary said he keeps his distance from Big Foot. He does that so well that Big Foot saw him today and he had no idea who he was.
Jon also mentioned the nasty cough Big Foot had during the interview and how Artie joked about how he wanted to know what he had just given them all.
Gary said that they found Big Foot in this contest to find a new Wack Packer and Big Foot was a last minute addition to that game. He said that no one thought he'd ever be a big star.
A caller asked if they think that Big Foot is going to make it through the winter. Gary said that he looked like he was getting ready for winter with his ZZ Top beard.
Jon brought up the story Wanda told about working for the NSA and how her family told her not to leave that job to go into comedy. Jon said that Wanda also talked about being married to a man and how she eventually came out as a lesbian. They wondered if she left the marriage because it didn't work out or if it was because she realized she was gay.
A caller asked Gary about an old show where Gary turned out to be a leak on the show and how Howard came down on him and didn't come down on him that hard. Gary said they played that on a replay there. Gary said that it was before they were going into Philly and the whole thing was pretty scary for him. Gary said that Howard taught him a lesson with that whole thing and he made him think about what he says to anyone.
Another caller asked if Scott the Engineer is on that email list. Gary said that he is but he was out in Las Vegas and he was also cleared by Ronnie.
Jon took a couple more calls that were about Ronnie. One guy asked if Ronnie looked sad today after all of this. Gary said he did look pretty sad. Another caller asked what this was all about because he didn't have all of the details. Benjy said he could explain really quick but they had to end the show so they didn't let him answer.
Today's Best of the Week was over around Noon.