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Howard started today's show singing along to his opening theme song. Howard said he thinks those were the words. He said he saw Robin for about 2 seconds last night. Howard said George Takei invited him to see the opening of this play he's in. Howard said they all love George. Howard said he's the best. He said he told a reporter that George is the only one who pronounces the T in tsunami. Howard asked if Fred was where. Fred said he wasn't invited. He said George is pulling a William Shatner on him. Howard said he would have given him his seats. Robin said there were two empty seats next to her so they must have been for Howard and Beth.
Howard said Beth had to fly out of town so she wasn't around. Howard said he didn't want to blow off the opening so he walked the red carpet. Howard said George sent him personal notes about the play and asked him to come. Howard said he wanted someone famous to come. Howard said he was honest with the press and said he never thought this play would make it off the ground. Howard said George has been talking about it for years.
Howard said he went down to the red carpet. He said he was so tired yesterday. He said he's so glad he didn't stick around. He said he was sleeping by 8 last night. Howard said he was up really early yesterday morning. He said he was up at like 4am. Howard said he was done by 8 last night. He said he was annoyed he had to go to the opening. Howard said he hates the press line because they shoot the cameras up his nose. He said he's too tall. Howard said he took a shower and went over there. He said there were some web site type cameras and people were intervening him with phones. Robin said she saw him talking to some people on their phones. Howard said they had a tape recorder or a phone. Howard said that's when you know it's time to leave.
Howard said they were asking him about George and he was talking about what a great guy he is. Howard said he was talking about how ridiculous the idea for the play is but he's glad he got it off the ground. Howard said he was asked about Trump and if he'd vote for him. Howard said it had nothing to do with the play. Robin said she was asked about Trump too. She said she asked if there is anyone else running. Howard said he talked about how great Trump is on the show. He said he would love him to be elected so he can see Camp David. Howard said he was asked if he saw Trump on Saturday Night Live and he hadn't seen it so he couldn't comment. Howard said there wasn't much about George.
Howard said he was respectful to George and didn't say going to the play was like going to an internment camp for him. Howard said he walked through the press line and he thought they were going to put him in the theater. Howard said then he was going to walk out to his car out the side door. Howard said there was one guy from the audience who was hanging on his arm and he had to tell' him to let go. Then he got out of there. Howard said the guy didn't even ask to take the selfie. Howard said he just started doing it. Howard said he hates the way he looks so he's not going to do that. Howard said he doesn't want people running around with a shitty picture of him. Howard said he didn't see Gary there. Robin said he was already in the theater.
Howard said he got up at like 4 this morning and watched The Walking Dead. Gary came in and said that the play is exactly what Howard would think it is. Howard said that George plays his own father right? Robin said he plays himself and his grandfather of himself or something like that. Gary said there's a scene in the play where the family is listening to the radio and FDR says what date it is and a guy gets up and starts singing about the war. Howard started to sing about the war like he imagines it is in the musical. Howard stared out kind of mellow but then Fred played happier music so Howard picked up the pace. Howard did that and Gary said he isn't far off. Howard was singing about giving him a gun and wanting to go fight the enemy. Howard was singing about his friends being dead and the peppy music was still playing. Gary said if that was in the play no one would even bat an eye.
Howard said that he cast must have been mostly Asian. Robin said she believes they are. Gary said it was a pretty large Asian audience too. Howard got back into singing and made up more lyrics for the play.
Fred played different music and Howard made up some lyrics about being in the internment camp. Howard was singing about how it was no camp and it was kind of cramped. Howard said that's called ''I'm Chinese and I'm in a Japanese internment camp.'' Howard said they must have had a good time. Gary said Howard has no idea how close he is without having been there.
JD came in and said that he heard one of the songs and it's almost exactly what Howard is singing. Howard played some of the song and it was the same type of peppy music and they were singing about being in paradise. Howard listened to a little bit of that and commented on what he was hearing. He made up some of his own lyrics for that song too.
Robin said there are some white guys in the play and they are bad people. Howard said he can't believe they have that wood block in the song. Howard said that guy must play multiple instruments. Howard asked Fred to play more music for him. He made up another song about Sulu being in the Japanese American Internment Camp. Howard said he's had enough of that.
Robin said George was beaming after the show was over. Gary said he thinks that George and Brad have all of their money tied up there. He said he told Brad he hopes it does well and Brad said ''It better!''
Gary said Howard didn't even come to say hello. Howard said he was planning his escape all morning. Howard said he had to get out of there.
Howard played a new song parody for Gary. It was from Daniel Mendelson. Howard said the ''Mama Monkey'' thing is the only thing that disturbs him. Gary said he heard it and it was fine until JD started laughing at it.
Howard played a song parody that Sour Shoes left when he called their voicemail. Howard played that and Sour was singing the song as Gary and singing about unfriending Howard on Facebook.
Howard said he has everything down with Gary. Howard said he would watch a play with him as Gary. Howard said he has the throat clearing to the time of the music. Howard said that guy is a genius. Howard said he's glad he found some time in his busy day to record that. Howard said he has another song about Gary unfriending him. Howard played that one and it was ''Gary Unfriended Boff.''
Howard asked if Gary and Robin would recommend George's play. They both said yes. Gary said that George is really working his ass off with that play. Robin said you could see what a good actor George is. Robin said George cried in the play and Brad said that's how you can tell how good he is because he never cries at home. Howard played an announce that George did for them when he was there last week.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he hates to bring down the mood but he wondered if they heard about Johnny Fratto. Howard said he did. Robin said she did too. She said she was shocked. Howard said Johnny had lung cancer and he died last week. Howard said he managed Eric the Actor at times. Howard said that he was really sad when he read the news. Howard said Johnny got the joke with Eric.
Howard played Johnny's last call to the show. In that call they were talking about Eric the Actor dying. Howard and Johnny were talking about Eric the Actor's birthday.
After that Howard talked about how Johnny's father was a mafia guy and he told stories about that on the show. Howard said that he wants to spend a few minutes on that. Howard played a clip from 2006 when Johnny was on the show talking about his life as a boy and the Harlem Globetrotters came to town. In that clip Johnny talked about how he went to the doctor to get a shot and he refused to take it. He said his dad told his cousin to take the shot to show him it wouldn't hurt. He took the shot after seeing that. Then the Harlem Globetrotters came to play for them the next day. He said his cousin found out that he was allergic to the shot he got the day before so his head blew up to the size of a watermelon.
Howard played another clip of Johnny talking about the show Bonanza and how his dad brought in all of the guys from that show to help them out with something by riding in a parade for them. Johnny said his dad got upset that Michael Landon cursed in front of the kids. He said his dad made Michael Landon ride in the parade and even grabbed his head and shook it yes.
Howard played another clip where Johnny talked about the space capsule that his dad brought home. In that clip Johnny was talking about how that happened in the 1960s. Johnny said that his dad said they couldn't keep it but they could play with it and it was one of the space capsules. Johnny told Howard he's not sure how they even got it in the house. He said they had it for about 2 weeks.
Howard said he was endlessly entertained. Howard said that Eric the Actor started calling in and he became Eric's manager. Howard said Johnny got the joke with Eric. Howard said the classic moment of all time was the time they heard ''You know what to do... You know what to do.'' Howard said he has a clip of Johnny playing the message for him when Eric demanded that Johnny do something to get back at this guy who said something about him on the air.
Howard got a laugh out of that. Howard said there were so many stories with Johnny. He said he just got it. Howard said another great moment was when Eric was going to shoot the TV show ''In Plain Sight'' in New Mexico and Eric was told there are werewolves there. Howard played a clip of Johnny and Eric on the phone and Eric was talking about having two girls at the same time and Johnny sounded very happy for him.
Howard said he has a million clips for Johnny. Howard said Johnny didn't mind taking a back seat to Eric's antics. Howard said he was the power behind the power chair. Howard said that Johnny had to separate himself a bit from Eric at times though. Robin said that Johnny didn't have small kids at that time. Howard said he had a second marriage and he would always talk about how he was too fucking old to be a new father. Howard had a clip of Johnny talking about how he was out of the woods and then he got married and having another young kid. Johnny said the kid follows him around and asks him a lot of questions. He said he asks about a lot of shit he knows nothing about.
Howard said rest in peace Johnny Fratto. Howard said he was sorry to learn that he passed away from lung cancer. Howard said he kept that very quiet. Howard said they're saying goodbye to another great team of Johnny and Eric. Howard said Johnny and Eric are together now. Howard said to his family and wife all of his children he gives their condolences.
Howard mentioned that Christie Brinkley is coming in today. Howard said he went back and watched that Billy Joel video she was in and talked about how hot she looked. He said they got Billy to dance in that video. He said he has to ask her about that. He said the song was great. He said she doesn't get out of the car until about a minute and a half in. He said he knows because he's watched it so many times. Howard said she looked so hot. Howard said there isn't one heterosexual man who didn't want to bend her over that car. They went to break after that.
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Howard asked Bernie about some more of his thoughts on various things and Bernie threw in a mentioned of High Pitch Eric. Howard asked about Carly Fiorina and Bernie said he'd fuck her. Howard asked what he thinks about Playboy dropping nude photos of women. Bernie said he grew up looking at National Geographic so he can't get off without looking at women with flies swarming around their head.
Howard let Bernie go and went over some of the stuff they just learned. Robin said he's trying to be outspoken. Robin said he must be trying to be like Trump.
Howard said he has a phony phone call where Hillary Clinton calls a diner. Howard played that and they had a fake Hillary calling and talking to an employee at this diner. She was telling the guy how to hug her when she does a spontaneous hug with him. She gave all of the details of how that was going to work. She also told the guy she needs to show that she's heroic so she's going to pretend to save his life while he's choking on a sandwich. She had him pretending to be choking and asking her to save him. After that was over they went right to break.
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Howard asked Sal when he became so religious. Sal said he's not. Howard said people are upset about Starbucks Christmas cups because there's not enough decoration on it. Howard asked who really gives a fuck. Howard asked Sal what's going on with him. Sal said that he thinks he's going to be ridiculed about this. He said this mall has Santa in a space cube with no trees or anything else. Howard said they have Santa sitting there so what's the problem. Sal said Howard is scrambling his brain. Howard told him to take his time.
Sal said people are now offended by trees and decorations. He said that he has no problem with whatever you want to practice with religion. Sal said that the mall doesn't want to offend people. Howard said they're trying to make the most amount of people happy. Gary read the post that Sal put on Facebook. It was Sal talking about his disappointment when other people are exploited and things like that. Howard asked Sal why he cares. Gary said Sal is boycotting all Simon malls. Howard said Sal will forget it in 2 days. Howard said maybe that Santa isn't to his liking but they're trying to make people happy. Howard said that if you want Santa or a haunted house then do it in your own house. Sal said they keep catering to not offending people. Howard asked if he's offended when he sees Santa and it's not enough for him.
Howard asked when Sal was last at church. Sal said it was Tuesday because his son just made his confirmation. Howard said he heard Sal is upset with the homeless people too. Sal said that he's so pissed off at the drug addicts out there on the street. He said this DeBlasio is letting it happen. He said it's getting dangerous. He said he heard a guy yelling at him for walking slow behind him. He said he picked up the pace because of the guy. Howard said Sal wants Santa in the mall with trees and that will satisfy him. He wants all of the homeless dead too. Sal said not all of them. He said Giuliani and Bloomberg did a great job getting rid of them. He said you can't walk down the streets with your family with them out there.
Howard said he heard that Sal and Richard are crying over the band Coheed and Cambria. Sal said that he, Richard and Memet keep singing ''I'll Suck Your Ween'' back there all day. Howard said he can get that out of their heads with this new Justin Bieber song. Howard played some of that and then played their gay version of it. Howard said that's nice. Howard played some of ''I'll Suck Your Ween'' too. Sal said Richard said to him that they had to get that song out of their head by playing Coheed and Cambria. Sal said that ''I'll Suck Your Ween'' is in their heads all day long. Howard played that again and the new song too.
Sal told Howard what it is about the song that makes him cry. It's one line about how the guy is an anchor for his kid when he's on the road. Sal started to choke up talking about that. Howard asked why Richard is crying over that. Sal said it's because Richard thinks about his dad. Howard played the Coheed and Cambria song ''Atlas'' and Sal was crying saying that his makeup is running. Howard said he can't even understand the lyrics. Howard said Mark Harris even thinks this song is gay.
Howard let the song play and said he's going to let Sal cry over it. He gave up after a few seconds. Howard said how about working back there. Sal said they are working. He said that ''Suck your Ween'' song is stuck in their heads though.
Howard said he got a note saying that Sal and Richard will definitely cry if they hear the chorus from the song. Richard came in and said he cries thinking about Sal during the song. Howard said they should get married. Sal said Richard is the definition of what life is all about. Howard said he should separate the two of them. Howard asked if Sal is crying now. Sal said he is. He said Richard has such a big heart. He said he puts everyone ahead of him. Howard asked if he's in love with him. Sal said he is. Richard said Sal is very giving too. He said he does charity events and helps raise money. Howard said maybe he does it because no one is willing to pay him.
Sal said that he can fart back there and he'll make Memet vomit but Richard just takes it and doesn't complain. Howard said he's going to play the song again and if they start to cry he wants them to raise their hand so he can talk to them immediately. Howard played more of ''Atlas'' and Richard said he was losing it. Howard asked what he's thinking about. Richard said the song is just so sweet. He said it's the love that a father has for his son. He said it just makes him happy to hear it. Howard asked if he thinks that every father loves his son like that. Howard asked how Sal is doing. Sal said he was doing okay. Howard let the song play a little longer. Sal said sometimes you just wish your children would see things differently. He said they're teens now and you want to shake them and tell them that things are not how they see them. Howard said maybe his son sees it more clearly than he does. Howard said based on his conversations with him that might be the case.
Howard said what's weird is these little people who have a full sized kid and the kid is normal. Sal said he gets it. He said that he's saying that just because he's stupid doesn't mean that his kids will be. Sal said it's tough to know that you can't steer your kids in the direction you want to. He said time will take its toll and they'll have to learn on their own.
After that they played a ''Beetlejuice Is Bond'' commercial parody and then went to break.
Robin said she heard Howard correcting Gary on his grammar earlier. Howard said that Beth used to correct him after he asked her to do that when he said something improperly. Howard said he had to say that to Gary earlier. Howard said it drives him crazy when people say ''Him and I.'' Howard said it's ''He and I.'' Howard said that makes him crazy now. Robin said that they say that a lot on The Bachelor. Howard said it took Beth about 5 years to beat that into his head. Howard said that applies to ''She and I'' as well.
Howard said he was listening to a song the other day and he thought he had never heard it before. Howard asked him to look up the band Chickenfoot and the song ''Oh Yeah.'' Howard said he was listening to music while painting and this song comes on. Howard had Fred play it. Fred played the song and Howard said he heard it and thought it was really good. Howard said it's sexy. Howard said he wondered how he had never heard the song before. Howard said he thought it might be embarrassing. Howard said it turns out it was Sammy Hagar, Joe Satriani, Michael Anthony and some other guys. Howard said he thinks it's great. Robin said it's okay. Howard said it's a shitty name for a band but a good band.
Howard said Alanis Morissette got some love after she was in there. Howard read some email they got about her appearance last week. Howard also had some feedback about the Robin singing clips that Fred has been playing recently. Howard had him play some of those.
Howard said Bryan Cranston got some good feedback too. Howard read some mail about that. He said the mystery woman that he was going to be working with was Jennifer Garner.
Howard read about High Pitch Eric's voice getting low when he gets tired. Howard read some email about some other things they did last week. He got some feedback about Carly Fiorina and people saying she's not that bad looking. Howard said Bobo got some bad feedback too.
Howard asked Bobo what he has. Bobo asked Howard how happy he is with Sirius subscribers going up so much in the past year. Howard said he's thrilled. Howard said he has made predictions about how many people would join. Howard said they had 400,000 when he joined. Howard said he predicted they'd beat XM and they'd be a dominant medium. Howard said he predicted 30 million subscribers some day and now they're approaching that. Howard said he's very pleased. Bobo said the stock is at a 52 week high of $4.14. Howard said he's happy with all of that.
Bobo asked Howard if he could reveal what his mind blowing job offer was a few months ago. Howard said that's a legitimate question. Howard said from time to time in his career he gets a lot of offers. He said when it rains it pours. Howard said he'd like to just quit everything at times. Howard said if he retired you wouldn't see him anymore. Howard said he wants to continue in radio because he has all of these great people around him. Howard said he is enjoying everyone even Benjy. Howard said he seems to have quieted down lately so he likes that. He said sometimes he looks over to make sure he's there. Robin said she has to do the same.
Howard said a part of him really does enjoy the radio show. Howard said he thinks about just doing that. Howard said it's that or retire. Howard said there's a part of him that likes when these other job opportunities arise. Howard said he got two from different network. Then last week he got a call about a new opportunity and it would be beyond his wildest expectations. Robin asked what that could be. Howard said Robin could probably guess it. Robin said maybe a game show thing. Howard said he's not answering that thing.
Howard said he got his incredible offer and there is a part of him that wants to do everything. He said there's another part that wants to do nothing. Howard said he's trying to figure out who he is. Robin said it's very late in the game to be thinking about this. Howard said he knows that. Robin said that she knows that if he was 26 he'd do it all. She said she's not sure who he is now.
Howard said he didn't even have Bobo's Toupee on the phone today. He let Bobo go after that. Howard asked if they have anything Bobo going on. Gary said nothing new. Howard played a Bobo Song parody after that.
The caller asked if Underdog has ever been on the radio show and he wondered how Shuli got her to appear on the show like he did. Howard said she won't come in the studio and won't have anything to do with him. Howard said she hasn't been in there recently but maybe years ago.
Shuli said in the end of the special he asked Underdog what her three wishes were. He said that she just wants to be a star. He said if they bring her in there to get her something nice and make her a star that would make her life. Howard said they should buy her a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. Shuli said that would be great.
Howard played a clip of Underdog answering the door for Shuli when he went to visit her. He also had audio of her freaking out when she wasn't able to buckle her seat belt in the car. Howard asked why she was so nervous. Shuli said she was nervous about not being able to buckle it and he had to help her out. Howard let Shuli and the caller go after that.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked if they think that George is going to get more ass now that he's on Broadway. Howard said George did say they're not having as much sex as they used to but George is still jerking off 4 times a week. Howard said that he's 78 and he's kind of resigned himself to just jerking off. Robin said Brad has lost weight too. She said she almost didn't recognize him.
The caller also brought up how George always corrects Howard on the ''Japanese internment camp'' line. Howard said it's very funny when he does that. They spent a minute talking about that.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked if he saw the article about his daughter in the paper. Howard said of course he did. Howard said his daughter, Emily, called and said that she isn't even sure what that was about. Howard said his three kids are fucking amazing. He said Emily was just in a relationship so he's not sure what that was even about. Howard said that article wasn't very reflective of what their relationship is about. Howard said she does date men and every successfully. Howard said it didn't really reflect their relationship. Howard said two weeks ago they had him in the post as being the leader of a cult over the book ''Getting Things Done.'' Howard said it's a book about organizing lists. Howard said that's the lamest cult ever. Howard said if he's going to have a cult it's going to be something wilder than that. Howard said Emily is great and she's a terrific kid so he's blessed to have three great daughters. The caller said he was shocked by that article. Howard said he was just with her at his mom's house the other day. Robin said there is so much misinformation about him. Robin said last week they were talking about Gwen Stefani and Blake Shelton possibly being a couple. Robin said now they're saying that Gavin Rossdale is wondering if something was going on with them before the end of their marriage. Robin said Gavin is saying that it's suspicious to him.
Howard said he was dating Howie and that never came out. Howard said he blew him about 5 times in the dressing room. Howard said he juggled his balls with one hand while he was doing that.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked if Christie Brinkley is really coming in today. Howard said she is. The caller said that's his ''hall pass'' and he'd love to be able to talk to her. Howard said he'll do that for him. The caller said Sarah Silverman told him that if he got on the show and said her name 5 times she'd show him her tits. Howard said he can do that. The guy got in her name at least 5 times so Howard told him to get back to him about her tits. Howard wished him luck with that. The caller told Howard that she gets fucked up the ass in her new movie. Howard said he might have to see that. Then he said he's not sure he wants to see her getting fucked in the ass.
Howard took a call from a guy who said that Beth looks kind of like Christie Brinkley. Howard said there are some people who say that. Howard said he had to take a break so he can get to Christie. As they were going to break they played a prank call the guys made using clips of Howard reciting lyrics to songs. They also played a John the Stutterer song parody.
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Howard came back and said he didn't realize that Christie Brinkley is a musician. He said she's out in the hall playing guitar and singing about Baba Booey. Howard had her come in and play. She was just strumming nothing on the guitar. She was singing about Baba Booey though. Howard said look at Christie Brinkley. He thanked her for coming in. Christie thanked him for having her. Howard said her body is still in shape. Howard asked what she's doing to stay in shape. Christie said that she'll send him a Total Gym because she actually uses it. She said that she partnered with them like 20 years ago. She said she uses it maybe 3 times a week. Howard said she looks fantastic. Howard said her boobs and everything look tight.
Christie said that she was wearing Spanx but she had to take them off. She said she has nothing on under her skirt. She wasn't even wearing panties. Howard said she says in her book that panties are important. Christie said it's very important to know your seams and when to take them off. Howard said women want to look good and she talks about this in her book. Howard asked if she wears thong panties. Christie said sure. She said that's usually what's in her drawer.
Howard asked if she's actually wearing panties or not. Christie said she's a big fan of invisible stockings too. Howard asked if she's wearing them now. She said it's Howard's guess. Howard asked if she makes them. She said she wishes. Howard said Christie is showing a lot of leg and he says that she says you either show your legs or your boobs. Christie said it depends. She said it depends on the person too. She said if you do have great cleavage then it's best to choose one of the other. Howard asked if her's are natural. Christie said of course they are. Robin asked if she saw that Giselle Bundchen got hers enhanced. Christie said she did. She said that she doesn't know what the big deal is. Howard said she was trying to hide it so that made it a big deal. Christie said that she has seen her since and she looks the same as always. Howard said Christie looks stunning too.
Howard asked Christie when she was modeling did she get jealous of other models. Christie said no. She said that people like to think that happens. She said there are enough jobs out there. Howard asked Christie about her book and saying that underwear can make or break an outfit. Howard asked if she is wearing underwear or not. She said she is not. She said she was in a rush to get there today. She said she's wearing a tight leather skirt and she wanted to put on the Spanx. She said that she got dressed and saw herself in a mirror. She said she could see the seam. She said that she took them off. Christie said she was running late so she just pulled it off and stepped out of it.
Howard asked if Christie has ever done nudity in anything. Christie said she hasn't. Howard asked if she ever wanted to do tasteful nudes or anything. Christie said she has been nude on the set with nothing showing but that's about it. Howard said if she had done it in her prime years she could have had them today. Christie said that she knew she wanted to be a mom and she didn't want her kids to see that. She said that she didn't want the kids to have to be on the playground with other kids showing them the pictures. She said she doesn't have those issues now. Howard said she never got into any scandals or anything with sex tapes or anything. Christie said not yet.
Howard said he was talking about that Uptown Girl video and how mind blowing it was. Howard said she comes into the video at 1 minute and 41 seconds. Howard said they focus on her legs and feet. Christie started dancing around. Howard said she says in her book she says that a smile is the best weapon you have. Howard said when he smiles he looks like a witch. Howard said Christie says that if you're feeling blue you still smile. Howard asked if that's phony to do. Christie said that a smile has been proven to release endorphins in your body. Christie said if they all try it now it will make you feel good. Howard said she's making sense. Howard said he should have banged her at some point. Howard said he never met her before though.
Howard said he was on a press line last night and this woman looked very sour to him. Howard said later on she was smiling and he realized that she's a pleasant person. Howard said he thinks she's making a legitimate point. Christie said absolutely. She said just physically it lifts your face. She said humans are attracted to people who are smiling. Howard said if he goes on a job interview he should be smiling then. Christie said he should.
Howard said Christie has a new book out called ''Timeless Beauty: Over 100 Tips, Secrets, and Shortcuts to Looking Great'' and you can get more info at ChristieBrinkley.com
Howard asked Christie how she got Billy Joel to dance in that Uptown Girl video. Christie said it was the director who did that. She said it wasn't her. Howard asked if it was choreographed at all. Christie said it wasn't. She said it was so hot out that night too. She said every step she made would make her heels sink into the asphalt. She said they were up all night shooting that video. She said it was so much fun too. Christie said the whole thing was put together very quickly and Billy was the one who asked her if she wanted to do the video. She said a couple of days later they were doing it. She said she got in trouble with SAG because she didn't know she had to get paid to do it. She said they weren't married at the time and she didn't get paid to do it. She said that they had to amend it to be union rules.
Howard said that Billy claims that the song was about Elle McPherson. Christie said that he came on Howard's show and said it was about her and not Elle. Christie said that they all met at the same time. Christie said that she was working in St. Barth's and Elle was there. She said Whitney Houston was there too. She said she was the cutest little girl at that time. She said she was still undiscovered. Christie said that she was having dinner and someone told her that Billy Joel was at the bar and her manager grabbed her and said they had to go. She said she didn't know who Billy Joel was. She said she found out that he was the guy who wrote a song that she loved that she heard in Paris. She said she got to sit with Billy at the piano that night. She said that she thought he looked like a Joe to her so that's all she called him.
Christie said that Elle was there too and she was looking all sexy and hot with him. She said that Billy finally got the microphone from her and he stared into one of his songs. Then Whitney said she wanted to sing. She said that Billy shooed her away. Then he played some ''Respect'' and she broke into that song and blew everyone away.
Howard asked if it was just the three of them. Christie said there were more people starting to collect. She said they were up close and personal though. Howard said his mind is boggled when he thinks about all three of them together. Howard said Billy must have been aroused. Howard said it would have been great if he had all three that night. Christie said she had a cute little sailor at the time.
Howard asked Christie if she remembers what they were wearing that night. Christie said it was hot so they were half naked and clothes were falling off. Christie said that Billy started the show before she was with him and he told her later that he didn't even know he was writing it about her. Howard said that Elle was out of the picture at that time then.
Howard said that Christie had so much going on in their lives. Howard said they must have had a lot of pressure. Christie said it was pretty perfect for years.
Howard said that Christie painted the cover of one of Billy's albums. She said she did and that was her first oil painting. She said she was doing other art work for airlines. She said that she was working on an assembly line doing paintings too. She said she loves painting. She said she just hasn't had time lately to do it. She said she did some recently and she felt hooked again. Howard said he thinks that she's painting because of her boyfriend. Howard said her boyfriend, John Mellencamp, can really paint. Howard said he can picture the two of them painting together.
Howard said that Christie was born in Michigan and her parents split at an early age. Howard asked how old she was when she moved. Christie said she moved to California when she was just 8 months old. She said she only went back once to visit relatives in Michigan. Howard said that Christie's mom met a really successful guy named Brinkley. Christie said that was when she was 8. She said she actually introduced her mom to the guy. She said that her biological dad gave her up for adoption. She said it was a blessing. She said she ended up with the greatest dad anyone can imagine. She broke down as she told Howard that. She said he was the most loving dad anyone could hope for. She said she lost both of her parents 3 years ago. She said they were still so in love. She said when her dad passed her mom said she couldn't live without her dad. She had a stroke the next day and never recovered from that. She said she passed away a couple months later.
Howard said that Christie's mom got a divorce and met the best guy in her life after that. Howard said so many relationships fail. Howard said it's a miracle when a relationship endures. Christie said that her parents were legendary for their love. She said they never had a sip of milk without touching each other's fingertips. She said they always kissed and were so in love. Howard said Don Brinkley was a blessing in her life. Christie said he was. Howard said he wrote a bunch of hit TV shows. She said that he was a producer too. She said he wrote many of the episodes. She said that she met him accidentally when she knocked on the wrong door and he helped her find her mom. She said she was just 7 and a half at the time.
Howard said that Christie was a surfer girl and he wondered if that's how she got her body. Christie said her dad had a house near the beach so that's how she got into that. She said that Don was loved by so many people. She said he was very successful. She said she would go to sleep hearing his typewriter going. She said that he'd do fun things with the kids when they came home and then he'd go back to work late at night. She said she'd hear that typewriter going as she was going to sleep. She said he was never stressed by that.
Howard asked Christie if she was a good looking child. Christie said she was okay. She said she was a little bit chubby with a round face. Howard said sure, he can imagine. Christie said around 13 she started to notice. She said she was asked to be a dancer on Hullabaloo when she was just 13. Howard said then things just start happening. Howard said she must think that people are just friendly and want to get to know her. Howard said he had the same experience. Howard said it must have been easy for her. Christie said it was a dream growing up in Malibu. She said she would surf before school. She said if there was a heat wave they'd stay in the water all day and skip school.
Howard asked if she thinks that she has that amazing body because of surfing. Christie said she thinks so. She said she got back into it and realized what a tough thing it is to do. She said she does the paddle boarding thing now. Christie said surfing on the East Coast is much different. She said she's still intimidated by the water on the East coast.
Howard said Christie moved to France. Howard said she must have been a hippie girl. Christie said she was. She said she protested the Vietnam war and other things. Howard said then she moves to Paris in the 1970s. Howard said she must have made tons of friends over there. Christie said she was going to college and she had a broken heart over a guy who broke up with her. She said that he was older than her. Howard asked who this guy was. Christie said it was just a guy. She said he was in college and she was just starting college. She said he was ending when she was starting. Howard said it's insane that he dumped her. Howard asked if she told him to take another look at her before dumping her. Howard said this is the guy he wants to make a movie about. Howard asked if he ever contacted her again after that. Christie said she's never run into him again. Howard said ''What a dick head!'' Howard said that was a stupid move. Howard said he must have killed himself. Christie said he was cheating with a Mary Tyler Moore stand in. She said she found out he was cheating on her and confronted him. Howard asked if she's ever looked him up on Facebook. Christie said she hasn't. She said they should Google him. Howard said he looks up every old girlfriend of his to see what they look like. Howard said that's what men do. Howard said that's the greatest thing you can do. Christie said she may have to do that.
Howard said when Christie was 19 someone discovered her. Howard said they brought her picture to Eileen Ford and one thing leads to another. Christie told Howard about this photographer in Paris who was an American. She said that she was living in a Garret over there and he saw her there. She said she was going to a public bath and using a telephone office to make calls. She said he waited there for her and he told her that he needed to photograph her. She said that she told him to give her his number. He didn't have a phone so she got his address. She said she tucked it in her pocket. She said she told a friend about the guy and she knew the name. They went to the studio and the guy took pictures of her in a park. She said that led to the Elite modeling agency asking her to come to meet them. Christie said she went and met them. She said that Johnny Casablancas was saying there was something about her chubby fat face and her body. She said they wanted her.
Christie said she walks out of the office and there are two very big photographers out there. She said they offered to give her a ride home. She said they told Eileen Ford about her and that's when she went home to visit her parents and Eileen was in Palm Springs at the same time so she met her out there. Christie said she met Eileen and she was wearing a bikini. Christie said that Eileen saw some photos of her and she was flipping through her book of photos. She said that her bikini triangle flipped up and her breast was exposed. She said she just ignored it like it didn't happen. She closed the book and the bikini just went back over her boob. Christie said that she introduced her to Nina Blanchard who brought her out to eat. She said that she got 3 TV commercials out of that meeting.
Howard said she had a Covergirl contract for 25 years. She was on the cover of Sports Illustrated multiple times. Howard said everyone gets to know her name. Howard said she was on the cover of Playboy but she never got naked. Howard said it's a charmed life. Christie said it was in many ways.
Howard asked about how Christie's first marriage broke up. Christie said they were just too young to be married. She said they were both too young. Howard said she got out of that. Christie said that was mutual. She said they were heading in different directions. Howard said the love her of life was that count that she married. Howard said he died. Christie said he did. Howard said it was a tragic accident. She said it was in a race car. Howard said she was a kid when that happened. Christie wasn't able to speak. Howard said that's a lot to deal with when you're so young. Christie said it's like you just cannot believe you're hearing those words and can't believe it's true. Howard said she probably would have gotten married to him. Christie said you never know. She said he really enjoyed life so much. She said he had a great enthusiasm for so much.
Howard asked if her marriage to Billy helped her get over that. Christie said it did. She said they were friends at first and he called to offer his support. She said they became even more friends and then it changed over. Howard said it has to be tough to be just friends with her. Howard asked how long she made him be a friend. Christie laughed. She said they dated a year and then they were engaged a full year before they were married. Howard asked how long they were ''friends'' though. She said it was a couple of months.
Howard said Billy and Christie have a great daughter. Howard said that they must have told her not to get into the music business. Christie said she came out singing and that's what she got into. She said she has a whole box of novels that she wrote as a child. She said that she was doing songs and parading around in costumes that she had around. Christie said she has video of her that she linked together when she was a baby until later in her life. She said that she went from that to the real piano and it was great watching her grow.
Howard asked Christie about how tough it was raising the kids being a superstar and being so well known. Christie said that she raised all of her kids out in the country, in the Hamptons, and it was nice. She said that one of her daughters is modeling and she is all for it. She said she's also a great filmmaker and a photographer at the age of 17. Howard said Christie got started at 19 and that's too late by today's standards. Christie said that her daughter still has to go with a parent to the set. She said that she is in school and she wants to get into art school. She said she's a great artist. She said she really has an eye. She said she wants to be a filmmaker first and foremost. She said she turns down a lot of modeling offers. She said she's in a couple this month but she turns down a lot.
Howard said it's very dangerous for these young girls to be with these photographers. Howard asked if Christie ever encountered any of the dangerous stuff. Christie said she didn't. She said nothing negative ever happened to her. She said she hasn't heard of a lot of things. She said she knows that does exist. She said that the young girls are always naked back stage and the cell phones are around so they have to be careful with those photos. Howard said that it's good to have these laws now. Howard said she's there to guide her daughter. Christie said that's right.
Howard asked Christie about this book and why she's writing it now. Howard said that she went through that divorce with Peter and that had to be tough. Christie said that she doesn't talk about it. She said you can't find a quote about it. Christie said the one time she said anything was when she spoke to Matt Lauer. She said that he brought up something that challenged her mothering abilities. She said she knows she's a good mom. Christie said she didn't get into the name calling or anything like that. She said she was upset with Matt but they've made up since then.
Christie said that people were still printing things like she was engaging in this stuff but she never did. She said that they said a lot of stuff that just wasn't true.
Howard asked if Christie had to go into therapy to help her through this stuff. Christie said her life is her therapy. She said she knows what's important. She said she has her priorities lined up. She said that she knows what's best for her family. Robin asked how you keep all of the news away from the kids. Christie said she took the kids out of town early on. She said she went on the most magical road trip out west. She said she was in Colorado and it was the most amazing thing. Christie said she promised the kids a great summer and she had the Paparazzi outside her house. She said she snuck out in the middle of the night and went off to Colorado with the kids. She said they just did it and didn't have a plan. Christie said that she wants to write that part of it all down. Howard said that being public isn't easy but she was able to take the family out there to bond and it was something she never could have had before. Christie said she discovered what really matters while she was out there. Christie said there was no cell phone out there and she was blissfully unaware of what was going on. She said if you don't know about it then it doesn't exist. She said it was all going on and she wanted the kids away from it so that's what they did.
Howard asked Christie about dating John Mellencamp. Howard said he's had him on the show a million times. Howard asked if she's leery of this relationship. Christie said she loves musicians. Howard asked if she is the ultimate chick into rock stars. Christie said she thinks artists are the most amazing people. She said they are constantly creating beauty for the world. Christie said that she loves music as the ultimate art. Howard asked if they're going to get married. Christie said she's leery of discussing her relationship because she doesn't want to jinx it. She said she was so dragged through the press before and she doesn't want that again. Howard said he should be at the wedding if it happens.
Howard said John has to stop smoking. He said he won't do it. Howard said he thinks it makes his voice sound better. Christie said his voice is already made and he can stop. She said he really does have to stop. She said the body can heal even after all the years of abuse. Howard said Christie became a vegetarian when she was about 12. She said it was between 12 and 14 but yes she is. She said that she read a book that made her stop eating animals. Christie said she never ate meat again.
Howard asked if John has written a song about her yet. He said he has to if he hasn't yet. Christie said she thinks Howard just did tell him to do that. Howard said she should hold out until he does write a song about her.
Howard gave Christie a plug for her book and told her stop flirting with him. He said he knows she is. Howard asked if she's rubbing herself because the leather feels good. Christie said she didn't even know she was doing that. Howard said the book, ''Timeless Beauty: Over 100 Tips, Secrets, and Shortcuts to Looking Great'', is out tomorrow. Howard said that she says anyone can feel sexy if you have the right underwear. Howard said he might need her help. Howard asked if she thinks that he needs work. He pulled his face back. Christie said that he has great skin. She said that her products could help him. She mentioned her stuff and how it could help him. She said it can stop your aging in its tracks.
Howard said he's thinking about that time Christie, Elle and Whitney were together. Howard asked if she kept in touch with Whitney. She said she did over the years. She said she was modeling at the time. Howard said Whitney was so hot back then.
Howard asked if it was fun doing Vacation. Christie said it was. She said she was on the set for 6 weeks so she was doing all kinds of things out there. She said it was a lot of fun. Howard said that movie was great. Christie said she loved seeing Jessica Simpson dressed up as her in the Ferrari. Christie said she has spoofed it in two commercials herself. She said that she did it on the Donny Deutsch show too. She said Howard is going to love that show. She said that she gets very racy in the show. Howard said he has to get her involved in something with him too. Christie said that her show with Donny is airing in a couple of weeks.
Howard said that the best beauty tip he ever got was to wear a paper bag on his head. He gave Christie some more plugs. Howard asked what she's doing in her daily life. Christie said the best thing about her life is that she doesn't have a typical day. Howard said she bought a ton of property so she's set. Christie said that she is.
Howard said he wishes he could be so free not to wear panties. Howard said he thinks that Christie has said enough. Maybe too much. She said maybe she did. Howard said he thinks she's worth about $80 million. Christie said she's read that too. Howard thanked Christie for coming in and gave her some more plugs. They wrapped up and ended the interview a short time later. They played Billy Joel's ''She's Always a Woman to Me'' as they were going to break.
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Howard took a call from a woman who said she wants to be Miss Jet Set Magazine. She said that she is in the finals and she needs Howard's help to vote for her. She said she's miss Jet Set New York and she wants to be Miss Jet Set USA. Howard said this is fascinating. Howard asked what the fuck Jet Set is. The caller said that it's about the most affluent people. She said it's about people who can afford private jets. Howard asked if it's all based on appearance. The caller, Elise, said that everyone who votes voted for her. Howard asked if she's in a bikini. She said she is. Howard asked if she's very good looking. She said she thinks she is. She said she's 50 years old. Howard laughed. She said go look her up and you'll see.
Howard asked Elise what she wins if she wins the award. Elise said it's $50,000 in prizes and $50,000 in cash. Gary said he's looking at the other contestants and they don't look 50 to him. Howard said that Christie Brinkley was in there and she looks ridiculously hot for her age. He said not everyone does. Gary said he's looking her up. Gary said he found her and she is in a bikini. Gary said he's looking at the other states and they look substantially younger. He said she has huge boobs and her body is in good shape. Howard asked it they can even vote. Elise said you can. She told Howard how to do it but Howard said he's already zoning out on this. He said he's not going to vote. She told Howard to hit ''I am not a robot'' and you can vote for her. Elise said she was on the show years ago. Howard said he doesn't know this magazine. He asked if there is any talent involved in this. Elise said not in this. She said it's all based on looks.
Howard asked if she gets a crown. Elise said she hopes so. Elise said she'd like to be on the show if she wins. Howard told her if she wins then call him and they'll see what they can do. Howard asked why she was on the show before. She said she was on in a pink bikini when he had his TV show. She said she knew Joe Franklin.
Howard said Sal just said she's hot as hell but he'd vote for Tan Mom. Elise said she's all natural too. Gary said they're huge. Gary said she's in good shape too. Howard said she'd definitely win Miss Motor Mouth. Fred said she's number 26 in the rankings right now. Howard took a look at her and said she isn't all natural because her nails look fake. She said the nails are real. She said she's had no plastic surgery. Howard said they tweeted out the link to vote for her. Howard said they'll see what happens. Howard hung up on her after that.
Howard said that he has to play a phony phone call. He said it might be the greatest ever. Howard said maybe he'll do it tomorrow. Howard said they took Bobo's audio where he was reeling off how many awards he's won and they made a call with that. Howard said he thinks it's funny as hell. Howard said he hopes nothing bad happens to him before tomorrow or you'll never hear it. Howard said it is great. He said you'll see.
Howard asked Robin if she's ever heard of Jet Set magazine. Robin said she has not. Howard said he can't wait to play that Bobo phony phone call. He said Robin has to remind him first thing to play it. Robin said Bobo has more awards than anyone. Howard said Bobo said he's magnanimous with his awards. He said Bobo has no idea what that means.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked what helped him hone his interviewing skill. He said he's the greatest. Howard said he has always been interested in it. Howard said he would interview people even in Hartford when he was starting out. Howard said that show got a lot of attention for him. He said he was always interested in what people had to say. Howard asked if the caller is jerking off because he hears something. Howard said he also attributes the skills to therapy. He said he thinks it's just something he's been interested in doing. He said he's relaxed enough on the air to do that. The caller said he is amazed when he hears an interview with someone he thinks isn't going to like and he ends up liking them. Howard thanked him and let him go after that.
Robin said that Move Magazine named her as one of their ''power women'' and she's on that list with Katie Lee, Pat Benetar and others. Howard asked what this list is. Robin said she doesn't have it in front of her but it's about accomplished women. Howard asked if Caitlyn Jenner is on it too. Robin said she is not. She said she was at their event and she made a speech. Howard said he sees that Mel B is on the list. Robin said she wasn't there that night. Howard made up a speech that Robin could have given. Howard asked if Pat Benetar was there. Robin said she was. Robin told Howard what she actually spoke about after Howard goofed on what he thought she might say.
Robin read a story about how people are upset with Starbucks over their holiday themed cup. Robin said they used to have snowflakes or ornaments but this year it's just a plain red cup. Robin said this has some Christian groups upset. Robin had some audio of one pastor talking about it.
Howard said he has some great audio of this woman who is running for Mayor and she speaks in tongues. Howard played some of that audio and said people are out of their minds. Howard said he made a good argument this morning that there is too much religious freedom in this country. Howard said this local radio guy is talking to this woman and she starts speaking in tongues whenever she gets upset. Howard played another clip of her speaking in tongues again when she was confronted about being a false prophet. Howard said it's like a child having a tantrum. He said her whole thing is blabbering away and wishing bad things on him. Robin said she's using her powers for evil. Robin asked where that took place. Howard said it was on the radio in Toledo. Fred played some audio of Tan Mom speaking in tongues too.
Robin read a story about a study that found that kids who aren't raised with religion being more generous with things than kids who are raised with religion. Howard said most of this stuff is based in fear. He said it's like if you don't pray and give money bad things will happen. Howard said Jim Baker is still out there doing this stuff. Howard said he thought he was dead. Howard said Jim Baker is talking about how food is scarce and people are going to be eating other people. Howard played some audio of Jim Baker talking about that with his people.
Howard asked how this is religion. Howard said somehow these guys make money doing this shit. Howard said they somehow make money. Howard played more Jim Baker talking about praying what to wear and he claims God told him to wear read one day and the stock market crashed after that. Howard said that Jim Baker was the guy with Jessica Hahn. Howard asked where she's been. Gary said he hasn't heard from her in ages. Gary said not even an email. Howard said they kept calling one of those shows and kept asking for crazy stuff and the guy prayed for everything they asked for. Howard replayed some of that Periscope audio where the guy was praying for Gary, George Takei and Howard. Howard said he even prayed for the lump. Howard said he has to play that again.
Howard took a call from a guy who said they've heard from Jeff the Drunk's lump and Bobo's Toupee but he wonders if they could hear from Tan Mom's Tan. Howard said he doesn't think that's possible. He did a live commercial read after that.
Howard said he's not sure how but he gained weight over the weekend. He said it's like 3 pounds. He said he was like what the fuck. He said it's bullshit. Howard said he eats the same thing every day. He said he did have dessert one night. He said it was all small portions though. He said he does like that stuff. Howard said maybe he'll knock out the cheese. Howard said he can't fit in any of the new suits he bought. Howard said he had to squeeze into what he was wearing last night.
Robin said there is a push in the porn industry to make actors wear condoms. Howard said it's a turn off for him to watch guys wearing condoms. Howard said he wears them for birth control but it slows him down when he watches porn with guys wearing them. Howard said he's not sure why. Ronnie came in and said the worst thing with the condom thing is that he'll pull the condom off and then finish on a chick. He said it's disgusting. He said if you're going to fuck her then leave your dick in there. He said he doesn't give a shit about seeing a guy cum. Howard asked why it's a turn off to see a guy wearing one in porn. Ronnie said he doesn't know but it's weird. Ronnie said you want to see cock if the guy is fucking a chick. He said you don't want to see a piece of rubber on it. Gary told Howard that JD was saying that it makes the situation too real when you see the condom. He said he wants the fantasy. Robin read more about that story and had some audio of some people commenting on what's going on.
Howard asked Ronnie if he wears condoms. Ronnie came in and said that his girlfriend, Stephanie, is on the ring. He said it looks like a rubber without a rubber. He said it's a ring that she shoves all the way up there and it's supposed to be good for the whole month. He said then you take it out and bleed for a couple of days and then put another one in. Ronnie said Howard should try it. He said they say it's 90-94 percent or something like that. Howard asked if he checks it with his finger. Ronnie said sometimes he feels it in there. He said one time they were going at it pretty good and it came of on him. He said it came out of there. Ronnie said she's been using that for like 9 years. He doesn't use rubbers. Howard said that's interesting. Howard did his Ronnie voice and goofed on him for a short time.
Howard said they're sending Ronnie to a porn expo to ask porn stars questions. Ronnie said it's in Edison, NJ. Howard thought it was in Las Vegas. Howard asked if he's going to just wing it there. Ronnie said he is. He said he's going with Memet and Justin and Wolfie should be there too. He said he knows some of the girls there. He said they were hot chicks of the week. He said Kendra Lust and Vikki Vette will be there. Howard kept doing his Ronnie impression and talked about the Nuvaring thing. They store them in the refrigerator so they had some fun with that. Howard said Ronnie is a little old to be having a baby. Ronnie said she doesn't want to have kids either. Ronnie said Howard should try it out. He said she seems to be fine using it. Howard and Fred did their Ronnie impressions and made up stuff that Ronnie could say. Ronnie said the ring is still good even if you don't realize it's out. He said it's still working. He said one time it fell out and his dog Dudley found it in the bed. He said it was funny as shit. Ronnie said the porn girls use that thing too.
Robin read a story about the inventor of Atari and Ronnie said he used to drive the guy who ran the company years ago. His name was Michael Moon. He said that his kids had every Atari thing they made. He said they had every game before it hit the streets. Robin said the company was founded by Nolan Bushnell. Robin said he also founded Chuck-E-Cheese. Robin said that it's worth close to a billion dollars. Robin said he has looked into the future and he thinks there will be an end to driving in American cities. Howard said they already know that. Robin had audio of Nolan talking about how it will be illegal to drive in cities in 20 years. Howard did a live commercial read after that.
Robin read a story about caffeinated peanut butter and how Chuck Schumer is looking into it because it's got so much caffeine in it. Howard said he's a good guy for looking into that stuff. Howard said that's what no on else is looking into.
Robin read about how the church of latter day saints are under protest from some people who are upset about some rules they have in place over gay parents. Howard said they used to put out that Davey and Goliath animated series he watched as a kid. Howard did his impression of Davey and Goliath while talking about that.
Robin read a story about a new app called Rumbler which is for guys looking to fight with someone. Robin read about how that app works for guys who want to meet up and fight.
Robin read a story about Donald Trump's appearance on Saturday Night Live and how Larry David yelled out that he's a racist after a group offered $5,000 to anyone in the audience who did it. Robin said they say it was all scripted of course. Robin said there was a protest group that said they'd give 5 grand to anyone who did that so they owe Larry that 5 grand. Robin had some audio of Trump doing his monologue on Saturday Night Live. Robin said they had very good ratings thanks to Trump being on. Howard said they had a 9 share when they were on channel 9. Robin said that was before the days of cable. Howard said that's not true. They were on cable. Howard said he has to explain everything to her.
Robin had some audio of Donald Trump talking about Ben Carson. Robin had audio of Carson talking about what's going on with him. Carson claims he hasn't seen this going on with anyone else.
Robin said that Chris Christie is so far down in the polls now and he's trying to spin it to make it seem like a good thing. Robin had some audio of him talking about that. Robin said Hillary Clinton is campaigning too and she's looking at what happened in Houston. Robin had some audio of Hillary talking about that.
Robin read a story about a man who had a tapeworm removed from his brain recently. Robin said the man is recovering now. Robin said they think he ate some kind of unwashed food contaminated with tapeworm eggs and they eventually drifted into his brain. Howard said that's scary. He asked how they even figured it out. Robin said they did scans of the man's brain and saw it. Howard said he hears stories like that and thinks he has it too. Robin had some audio of the man talking about how he has some short term memory loss because of this. Robin had audio of the guy talking about seeing what was in his brain after the surgery.
Robin read a story about a Lennon guitar that sold for millions of dollars. Robin said it was sold over the weekend for over 2 million dollars. Robin said it was stolen back in the 60s.
Robin read a story about how Michael Moore is sticking up for Quentin Tarantino over some comments he made about the police. Robin said that Moore is ripping into Hollywood for not sticking up for Tarantino.
Robin read a story about the efforts to legalize marijuana and how an Indian tribe is trying to legalize it on their casino property. Howard said they should just legalize it everywhere. Howard said he's so annoyed.
Robin read about the box office and how Spectre made over $70 million. Robin said it beat out the new Peanuts movie. Howard said he doesn't give a shit about Peanuts. He said he never liked them. He said he hates all of them.
Robin read about the conjoined twins that will be delivered today in Georgia. Robin read about how they share one heart and are connected at the head. Robin said the mother is putting whatever happens in God's hands.
Robin read about how Adele is smashing records with her new song ''Hello.'' Robin had Howard play some of her song and Fred played a door slamming over it since that's what the bass sounds like in the song. Robin said it had more than a million downloads in a week. Robin wrapped up and Howard ended the show around 11:35am.
Jon asked when Bob started listening to the show. Bob said he listened in the 90s but he became a big fan when Howard moved to Sirius.
Jon said Howard can really make or break an artist and with satellite the listenership is there. He said even with Christie Brinkley coming through today you get to hear what Howard gets out of these guests. He said that it must be music to Bob's ears when he's listening to the show. Bob said he tells people about the time Billy Corgan was on the show and Howard said that he liked a track off the new album and he played that song that he wasn't going to play. He said that track went up on the charts and it shows how much power Howard has. Bob said Howard reaches more people than Fallon or Colbert. He said Howard has the greatest impact than anyone in the sphere. He said even Tan Mom gets a big bump. He said people feel like they know you when you're on the show. Jon said it's true when you hear that moment when people get conformable on that couch in the studio. He said you get to know what these people are all about.
Jon played a ''What You Need to Know'' about today's show. He said he wants to lead off talking about Howard's performance of Allegiance today. Gary said it says a lot about musicals on Broadway. He said it's just screaming the obvious. He said the play was really like that. Gary said it was a big night for George though. He said he's on stage just about the whole time. He said this is his pride and joy too. Gary said George did their show 10 years ago and he'd been working on it 10 years before that.
Jon said that you know what's coming when Howard goes out to an event like that. Bob said that Broadway is playing to middle America and it's kind of bland. He said that he'd like to hear what Howard would say about the play Hamilton. He said that they're almost doing Howard Stern's act in that play. He said the best is when Howard does his Mom and Dad talking about going to the yogurt shop. Gary said they told Howard about what Hamilton is about and Howard cringed at it. Bob said it's hard to get people to check out anything. He said everyone is inundated with data. He said if Howard went he'd testify that it's the best thing ever. He said he will go eventually and he'll admit he was wrong. Gary said he might be right about that. He said he has done that before.
Jon said that Howard hasn't gotten sick of that video she was in for Uptown Girl. Bob said that the funniest thing about today's show was that she wanted to go on record that the song was about her. He said it's funny that even people like that want to own something like that.
Bob told some stories about people he's written about in the industry and how he's gotten into some trouble with them. Taylor Swift was one he talked about writing a song about him. Gary said that's the kind of stuff you get in his column.
Jon said he wanted to ask about Gary having songs written about him. Jon asked if Bob is proud that he's had songs written about him. Bob said you can end up feeling humiliated. He said that she also wrote a song about John Mayer and he felt humiliated and he hit back. Bob said it took about 3 years for him to feel good about her writing a song about him. He said for a couple of years it was just a creepy thing.
Jon said Bob wrote about Alanis Morissette on the show. He said they were blown away by her performance of ''You Oughta Know''. Bob said he likes to go hiking at midnight and he knows that's insane. He said he was listening to that interview and Alanis was talking about the touchy feely stuff. He said that he heard that song and he stopped in his tracks. He said that was as good a performance as he's heard on the Stern Show. Gary agreed.
Jon took a call from a guy who said he thinks Bob would be great on the Stern Show. He said he deserves more time than just 5 minutes. Gary said they just got started. Jon said they lost the caller but he wanted to talk about Sal. Gary said Sal is no longer going to go to a Simon mall but he doesn't know which ones they are without a printed list. Gary said that Sal turned it into a religious thing. He said that he asked Sal why they don't have a giant Menorah there. Sal was arguing that he needs a Christmas tree at the mall and he didn't seem to know that you have to shop for gifts for Hanukkah too.
The guys spent a little time talking about Sal and how entertaining he is talking about that stuff. Bob asked what kind of crazy world we live in where only Howard Stern will stand up to Roger Waters. Gary said he has an ally now. Bob said he knows it's Mayim Bialik. Bob said that Roger Waters is anti-Semitic and he has to be shut down. He said he's not sure why people are so afraid of him. They spent a minute on that and then went to break.
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The caller also asked if Howard almost married Sal and Richard this morning because they seemed to be professing their love for one another. Gary said he's not sure where to begin with those guys. Gary said someone tweeted that the conversation couldn't have been gayer even if they had each other's dicks in their mouths. Jon said they really are like that in the back office. Jon asked Bob if he can get a sense of how much they really love each other. Bob said that Richard is genuine but Sal has something going on there. He said guys can get where they're coming from but they don't want to get too close because they're afraid of being accused of being too close.
Jon said Sal and Richard get on them for being too close but Sal and Richard are the ones who are really close. Gary said that he and Jon did share a room once. Gary said he and Jon are nowhere near the level of Sal and Richard. Jon asked if there is anyone in there who has a wife who loves the smell of their farts. Jon said he doesn't know of any.
Jon asked Bob who he would like to hear Howard sit down with as a musical guest. Bob said he knows they have someone coming up next week that's up there. He said they haven't had Elton John on recently. He said he will say anything and talk shit. Gary said that might be why it's so hard to get him on the show. Gary asked how he thinks Springsteen would fare on the show. Bob said you want someone who reacts and he's not sure Bruce could relax. He said maybe if he had a couple of drinks first. He said maybe if he performed some songs first he'd loosen up.
Jon took a call from a guy who said he's a fairly new listener to the show. He said it used to be about Ronnie's Block Party this and that. He asked if it was too much of Ronnie trying to get into the spotlight. Gary said he thinks that Ronnie believes he gets the joke. He said they feed him nothing though. He said this stuff he says comes out of his head. He said that's why it works so well for him. Jon said that there's nothing better than Ronnie's sex tips. Gary said poor Stephanie had to listen to that discussion about her O-Ring for 20 minutes. He said he doesn't think he could even go home after that.
Jon got in some plugs for today's Sternthology and wrapped up the show. They were done around 12:20pm.
Howard started the show talking in his radio announcer voice and trying to teach Robin how to do it. Howard said it's the worst fucking thing saying ''Good morning everybody.'' Howard said if that's how you open a show you should get out of the radio business.
Howard said he went to dinner last night with some friends who are artists. Howard said he's obsessed with painting and you realize it takes years and years before their technique happens. Howard said he realized it's the same with chess. Howard said chess masters take years to get where they get. Robin said you assume they're prodigies. Howard said that the chess masters don't know what the next move is unless they study the board. Howard said that's what artists have to do with what they paint. Howard said some people who are artists are the ones who stuck with it even if they were pretty good at it as kids. Robin said that's like Michael Jordan keeping at it when he was playing basketball. Robin said he did the hard work to get where he got.
Howard mentioned that Angry Alice loves Fred. He said it's almost an insult the way she likes him. Howard did his Angry Alice impression and then said that she will go off on him or Robin but then talk about her Fred. Howard played some Angry Alice audio where she said Howard looks like he has AIDS. She told JD to do whatever he wants because he's 35 and he can do whatever he wants. Then she said hello to ''my Fred.'' Howard said he's not sure what Fred has ever done for her.
Howard said he watched the end of The Walking Dead last night. He said that show is so fucking good. He said he has to congratulate AMC for that. Howard said they have that show Badlands coming out too. He said he wants to see that. Howard said he watched Homeland too. Howard said he got back from dinner and Beth came in from where she was.
Robin asked what time dinner was. Howard said she's going to laugh. Howard said he asked them to go to dinner at 4:30. Robin said that's not dinner. Howard said he called asking if they were open and they're not but they opened up for him. He said that they met at 4:30 at an empty restaurant and ate for like 2 and a half hours. Howard said he did some work after that. Howard said they called it lunch. Howard said it was dinner for him. He said he doesn't usually go to dinner when he has work the next day.
Howard said he got in bed around 7:30 and watched Homeland. He said it's back on track now. Howard he watched Gotham after that. He said he loves Ben McKenzie and he just started watching him in Southland too. He said he was good in The O.C. too. He said that you have to watch Southland too. He told Robin to do that. Howard said she'll love it. Robin said she's not a big cop show fan. Howard said she'll love it.
Howard said Gotham is so good. Howard said Beth watched the last 10 minutes and asked what this shit is. Howard said everyone was being killed and the Riddler was burying people. He said he was in shit heaven. Howard said it's the best thing for him. He said it's a good reason to live. He said it's comic books being taken seriously. Howard said these stories were as good as anything in Shakespeare. He said Beth just fell asleep after that. Howard said he starts talking and she goes right to bed. Howard said he loves Gotham.
Howard had another Angry Alice clip to play. He played that and Alice said Howard really does look like a witch. Howard said he knows that and he's the one who is putting himself down. Howard said he took a picture with Christie Brinkley yesterday. He said she is so good looking. Robin said she's an anomaly. Howard said they sat down on the couch to take pictures and he doesn't post them all because he doesn't look good in them. He said he doesn't have anyone there to fix his hair. He said he can't control it lately because it's getting longer. Howard said he thought he looked good on Letterman a few years ago and he asked Toni to let it get longer. Howard said he did that to look like he did 10 years ago. Howard said now his hair is out of control. Howard said he has to get it clipped again.
Howard said he looked particularly bad with Christie Brinkley. Howard said she looks hot in it but he doesn't. Howard said he thought it would be a cool picture to show to the fans until he saw what Jason sent him. He said he showed it to Beth and even she said that he could pass on that one. He said she told him it didn't look like him. Howard said it was pretty bad.
Howard got back to Angry Alice and said that she's pointing out that he looks like a witch which is what he's already pointed out. Howard said he just wants to get to her talking about her Fred. Howard played the clip and Alice was going off on him about running off and hiding behind his mother's skirt. Howard said he's not going to play her stuff unless she calls in. He said she's just leaving voicemails. Alice said hello to her Fred again at the end of that one. Then she said a sweet ''bye, bye.''
Howard said it's weird how she talks about how she doesn't care about the people who died in 9/11 and then goes to her Fred. Howard said it's weird. Howard said Fred won't say anything bad about Alice. Howard said she likes Benjy too. Fred said they can share her.
Howard took a call from a guy who agreed that Gotham is a great show. Robin said she's not as keen on this season as Howard is. Howard said they get to see the origin of Penguin and Riddler. Robin said she knows that. Howard said he was so happy seeing the Riddler starting.
Robin said she has a problem with the timing of everything. Howard told her to relax and enjoy. Robin said she wonders how the kid will grow up and then fight the old criminals. Howard said they were older in the comic books. Howard said the kid is 15 and the criminals are in their 20s. Howard said it will all work out. Howard told her to calm down over there. Robin said what about cat woman. Howard said she's the same age. Howard told her to calm down.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he wants to compliment him on the web site. He said it's mind blowing compared to the way it used to be. Howard said they do try to give you something to look at there. Howard said keep your eye on there and there might be something else. He said he won't give that away.
Howard said they have something up on HowardStern.com where they took the movie Private Parts and they had High Pitch Eric as Pig Vomit and Asian Pete plays him. Howard said it's where they're trying to teach him to say WNBC. Howard said they dubbed in the voices and it's pretty funny.
The caller said back in June he played a game and won a trip to see John Mellencamp in L.A. He said it was great. He said he loved playing the game. Howard thanked him for the call after cutting him off. Howard said he was a bit of a boring caller.
Bobo said you can't appreciate it without being in the service. Howard asked what service. Bobo said the postal service. Howard took a call from Bobo's Toupee who was goofing on him immediately.
Howard said Bobo called in with those awards and left the message. Howard talked to him about another type of award he mentioned and Bobo explained that one. Howard said this is the shit he calls their voicemail with and no one knows what he's talking about.
Howard took a call from a woman who said she took Bobo's driving course and it was boring. Howard said her name is Ketty. Howard asked what happened. Ketty said that he listed all of those awards on his show and she had total recall of taking his course. She said it was in Oceanside in the library. She said it was less than 3 years ago. Bobo said it sounds right. Howard said she took the class and Bobo got in front of the class listing his awards in class. Bobo said he didn't list them in class. Ketty said it went on for like 10 minutes. She said it seemed like the class was 4 hours. Bobo said she's a fraud.
Ketty told Howard that people take the class to get a discount on their license or for insurance. She said that Bobo has a captive audience because no one really wants to take defensive driving class. She said that it's like a punishment. Howard asked if she noticed his toupee right away. She said she did. Bobo said he doesn't believe this woman. Howard said he does.
Ketty said the thing that bothered her was Bobo holding up newspaper articles and expect them to see them from 20 feet away. Bobo said he put them on the table.
Howard asked if she said that she wanted to kill herself in class. Ketty said she did. Howard asked if it's true that he lists his awards in class. Bobo said that's not true. He said he might mention them in the class. He said he fits it in because he's proud of it. Howard said he didn't want to start world war III with this.
Ketty told Howard that Bobo thinks that he reinvented mirrors or something. Bobo said that people don't adjust their mirrors and you need to do that. Bobo said he did invent the Lean and Look. Howard asked if he's really the inventor. Bobo said he isn't an inventor of it. He said he's a big proponent of it.
Howard asked if Ketty has been in an accident since taking the course. She said she hasn't. Howard said the course must work. Howard said she just said he's boring. Bobo said she's the only one who has said that.
Ketty told Howard she loves him and she adopted a dog from North Shore Animal League. Howard said he applauds that. Bobo said good riddance to her. He said he hopes she runs off the road. Bobo said he hates her.
Howard got to the phony phone call that he was talking about earlier. In the call Chris Wilding called a show and said he was there with his dad working at a coffee shop and he wanted to tell them about it. Chris then plays the audio of Bobo listing his awards that goes on and on. Chris plays the audio over the host of the show. She tries to cut him off but Bobo keeps listing his awards. They hang up but Chris calls back with more of Bobo rambling. They banned him from the show after another call.
Howard said Bobo was banned again. Howard said even that show doesn't want Bobo on it. Bobo's Toupee said Bobo's wife should get an award for not murdering him. Howard said Bobo has won a lot of awards. He started to list some of the stuff Bobo was talking about. Howard asked Bobo how many he has. Bobo said about 70. Howard said he must know the exact number. Bobo said it's in the 60s or 70s. He said he's not sure exactly. Bobo's Toupee said they're all useless. Howard asked what the greatest one was. Bobo said he got the instructor of the year for the driving class. Bobo started to talk about some other stuff and Howard said he has to get out of this. He hung up on Bobo and went to break after that.
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Howard came back and said he has Whoopi Goldberg there. Howard said he has a lot to talk to her about but she has limited time. Howard said she has made a controversial book. Howard said her birthday is coming up soon. She said it's on Friday. She said she'll be 60. Howard said she looks good. Howard said some people can barely move at 60. Howard asked Whoopi what she's doing to keep in shape. Howard said she has been married a few times and her conclusion in the book is surprising. Howard said the book is called ''If Someone Says ''You Complete Me,'' RUN!: Whoopi's Big Book of Relationships''. Howard asked why she's coming out with it now. Whoopi said she felt it was time. Howard said he thinks it's politically incorrect advice. Whoopi said perhaps.
Howard Whoopi is saying that relationships don't work. Howard said she is happier single. Howard said that Whoopi did research and she found that most animals don't mate for life. Howard said she's right. Whoopi said we can make decisions about things and it sort of takes us out of that realm. She said it's possible that you have to do that extra mile to make a relationship work and she doesn't want to do that.
Howard said Whoopi's mother seems like a mean person. Howard said she said to her at an early age not to depend on her looks. Howard said she told her to develop her personality. Whoopi said she did. Howard said she told her that her face wasn't going to do it. Howard said that's a terrible thing to say. Whoopi said she was being honest. She said that she doesn't look like Halle Berry. Howard asked if she would tell her own daughter something like that. Whoopi said she would probably say it. She said it may have been harsh in the book and maybe it was more harsh than the way she actually said it.
Howard said Whoopi took it to heart and she developed her personality. Howard said that she did it. Howard asked why she claims in the book that the biological clock thing isn't real. Whoopi said it's people telling you that you should have a child. She said not everyone should have a child.
Howard gave Whoopi another plug for her book and mentioned that she's going to be doing a book signing tomorrow. She had no idea she was going to be doing that.
Howard said that Mike Nichols was Whoopi's mentor. Howard said she gets sad when she hears that name. Whoopi said he prepared her for a lot of things in her life but not for not having him around. She said she lost him and her big brother too. He died at the age of 65 and that was unexpected. She said it was an aneurysm. Whoopi said that you should get yourself checked if you have that in your family. She said she and her brother didn't get it checked. She said if he had been checked he may have been put on some kind of drug to help with that.
Howard said she lost Robin Williams too. Howard asked if they were in touch. Whoopi said she's not a big caller or texter. Howard said she says her favorite possession is her vape pen. She said it is. Howard asked if that helps her with her young looks. She said that just came recently. She said they have just lived well and healthily. She said Howard looks good and Robin looks good too.
Howard asked if Whoopi has an easier lifestyle. She said she works all the time so she's not sure about that. Howard asked her about Robin Williams and if she got to say anything to him and if she knew he was sick. She said she did know he was sick and she spoke to him about a month and a half before he died. She said that she was also with Mike 2 weeks before he died. She said that he brought her show to Broadway. Howard said he's responsible for her. She said he is. Howard asked what kind of advice he'd give her. Whoopi said he'd tell her that it was up and down and all around and sometimes it just won't go her way. She said she got that.
Howard said Whoopi did that one woman show and that got her noticed as a great actress and comedienne. Howard said that he was the great Mike Nichols. Whoopi said he was in a duo and she did kind of what they were doing. She said that he really liked it and he liked a bit she did about being a junkie. She said that connected them. Whoopi said that it was Mike and Steven Spielberg that really got her going.
Howard asked Whoopi about speaking at Mike's funeral. She said that she did that and it lasted a few minutes. She said that she made it through her speech but it was tough. She said that it's hard to find people like that in life. She said that support is everything. She said that he believed in her. Howard said he read about it and she had Paul Simon perform and all kinds of people got up and spoke. Howard asked if she went first. Whoopi said she went second. She said Tom Stoppard went first. Howard didn't know who that was. She said he's a famous playwright. Howard said Oprah was there too. Howard said that's what it said in the paper. Whoopi said she did see Oprah there. Howard asked what she said and if it was wise. Whoopi said they just said hi and that was about it. Howard asked if she smoked her vape pen at all. She said she did not. She said it may have made her talk non stop if she had used it.
Howard asked Whoopi about saying that she sees nothing wrong when you have this person in your life that you think is a soul mate that it's okay to have sex with a prostitute. Whoopi said it depends on the relationship. She said that if you have a conversation and you know what you're getting into then it's okay. Howard asked if she has had this in any of her relationships. Whoopi said it came from a friend of her's who had Cerebral Palsy and he really loved his wife but could not take care of her in the way they had a relationship. She said he had a conversation with her and told her that as long as it wasn't love then it was okay. Howard asked if she ever acted on it. Whoopi said she doesn't think so. Howard said that's why he likes her book. Howard said they can talk about this stuff. Howard said it's usually taboo to talk about sex and money in a relationship.
Howard said that people are uptight. Howard said a guy might masturbate but he won't tell his wife he did that. Howard said that he'll tell his buddy but not his wife. Howard said some guys don't want to hear that their wife is using a vibrator on herself. Howard said the man is jealous of the wife's relationship with a vibrator.
Howard said Whoopi also says that every relationship should have a pre-nuptial agreement. She said she thinks that's fair to leave with the same that you came in with. She said that she had one relationship where a guy wanted to take what she had. She said that was just once. Howard said marriage is a contract so don't kid yourself. Whoopi said you have to work at it too though. Howard said Whoopi also says she loves to fart. Whoopi said she does. Howard said when you're in a relationship it's hard to hold it in. Howard asked why she's so gassy. She said it's probably what she eats. She said that she knows people who don't fart in front of each other. Howard said he and his wife try to keep the romance alive. Howard said the gas thing is a turn off. Howard said Whoopi describes herself as a very sexual person. Howard asked if she still has those needs. Whoopi said she likes sex and she still masturbates. Howard said he still does too. Howard said he has masturbation and penetration. Howard said he'll still jerk off to babysitter porn... but only with adults of course.
Howard said Whoopi has blown everyone's mind. Howard said she is saying that she's going to call a dude and bang him here and here. Robin asked how many she has. Howard asked if she has a rotation of men. She said it's possible. Howard said she says that age isn't a big deal to her. Whoopi said you have to train them if they're young. Howard asked who the love of her life was. Whoopi said they talked about this last time. She said he was the gentleman who passed away. Robin asked if she could have had a relationship with that guy. Whoopi said maybe. She said in hindsight the past knits better. She said that he was the love of her life and he was a good guy.
Howard said that he wants to talk about The View too. Howard said she's the constant there. Howard said they have so many people coming and going over there. Howard said there have been 11 different people on that show since she got there. Howard asked if they want consistency there. Whoopi said she gets a check and she talks to whoever is at the table. She said she's not sure how to answer that. She said she has nothing to do with who is there.
Howard said that Whoopi has to sit down and be a pundit even though that's not something that she has done in her life. Howard asked if she sits down at that table and wants to be surrounded by a group of people she wants to open up to. Howard said the chemistry is important. Howard said if she was with people she didn't like then she might button up. Howard said that she has to be able to make the decision. Whoopi said she just rolls with it. She said she gets a paycheck and it's a nice paying gig. Howard asked how long her contract is for. Whoopi said she thinks it's up in August. Howard said she'll have to made a decision then. Howard asked if they want her to stay. Whoopi said that they haven't said anything.
Howard said that Whoopi and Rosie are both A-type personalities and he wonders if that's what caused the problems over there. Whoopi said that if you put 4 or 5 women together they make it a fight. She said there was no fight. She said that Rosie had a lot going on in her life and she took herself out of it. She said she likes Rosie and there was no infighting and all of that. She said the infighting is only good for publicity. She said it's not going on. She said it's good to hear but that's not really going on.
Howard asked if Whoopi is texting and tweeting. She said she was but she has cut back. She said she got tired of people making assumptions about her. She said she'd give the facts and people would still think it was something else.
Howard asked Whoopi if she's happy right now. Whoopi said she's pretty happy. Howard said she has no man in her life telling her not to fart. Whoopi said she has no man whose feelings she can hurt. Howard asked if she misses having a great love in her life. Whoopi said no. She said she has a crazy family and they are her number one priority.
Howard said Whoopi has experimented with women. Howard said he'd love to know who that was. Howard asked if it was just a woman from the street. Whoopi said sure. Howard asked if Barbara Walters will come back to The View. Whoopi said probably. She said that she was just on to talk about the great special she had. Howard asked if she gets caught up in the ratings at all. Whoopi said no. Whoopi asked when Howard or Robin will come on The View. Robin said no one has asked. Whoopi said she's asking right now.
Howard said Whoopi talks about finance, hygiene and more in the book. Howard said hygiene is very important in a relationship. Howard asked how often she bathes that thing. Whoopi said it's constantly being bathed. Howard asked what a woman should do to practice good hygiene. Whoopi said that women are raised to have good hygiene. She said that mothers tell their kids to wear clean underwear just in case you're hit by a car. She said you just have to be clean and brush your teeth. Howard said most people don't know they have nasty breath. Whoopi said that your friend should tell you if you do. Whoopi said she has told people that. She said that she'll tell them that the funk is really bad. Whoopi said if you love someone you'll tell them. Howard said that he backs up when someone has bad breath. Howard said Whoopi is talking frankly to people and not backing off. Howard said that she's talking about taking showers and things too.
Whoopi said the book has some good advice in it. She said this is the advice she gives everyone. She said someone said something odd to her once. She said that she was told by someone that if they ask if their pants look bad on them they want to be lied to. Whoopi said that doesn't make sense to her. She said she wants honesty. She said she won't hate someone for telling her that.
Howard asked if Whoopi has people evaluating her clothes on The View every day. Whoopi said she doesn't read anything so she doesn't know.
Howard said that they must have had some great stories on Hollywood Squares. Whoopi said they had a great time doing that show. Howard said she was the person on that show. Whoopi said they're producing other stuff now. She said her kid has a show on Centric which is right next to BET. She said that it's called According to Alex. She said it's good to see a show like that. She said she's producing the show. Howard said she must have enough money to stop working. Whoopi said she's not making that much. Howard said he read she's getting $5 million from The View. She said she gets less than that. She said it's not much less but it is less.
Howard asked if Whoopi is going to ask for a raise when her contract is up. Whoopi said that she isn't going to do that. Howard asked if she knows what Joy is making. Whoopi said she doesn't know. She said that's up to the agent to find out. Howard asked if she has spoken to her agent about that yet. Whoopi said she hasn't. Whoopi said they don't know what she's making on the show. Howard said they do now.
Howard asked if Whoopi can name everyone on the show. She named them one by one. Howard asked her about each person and said he gets the feeling that she's annoyed by Raven Symone. Whoopi said she's fine. Howard asked about them all talking over one another on the show. Whoopi said they have brought that up in meetings. Howard said maybe they should raise their hands. Whoopi said she has thought about how they do have a lot of people on this damn show.
Howard asked who she would cut from the show first if she had to. Whoopi said she'd cut herself. Howard said he'll let her off the hook on that one.
Howard said that she has to come to him when she goes in for the contract negotiations. Whoopi said she'll have to do that. Howard said she doesn't seem to have that killer instinct.
Howard asked if the vape pen is a great thing now. Whoopi said it is. She said she just quit smoking like 4 years ago. She said she saw some kids with cystic fibrosis and the kid said he just wants to breathe like a normal person. She said that cut her to the core. She said she got on Twitter at the time and asked if anyone wanted to stop smoking. She said about 100 of the did it and now 90 of them are still non-smokers. She said she was smoking about half a pack a day. She said once she quit she wasn't able to draw anything into her lungs. She said then she got sick. She said she has a weird thing where at some point she's going to lose her sight. She said she has glaucoma. She said it's not good. Whoopi said that the muscle in your eye swells and she was made comfortable smoking weed. She said she was told to keep doing it to keep the headaches away. Howard asked how much of her vision is impaired. She said she has front vision but the side vision is impaired. Howard asked if she's scared out of her mind. She said not really because you can keep it at bay. She said she should be able to keep her vision as long as she does what they tell her to do.
Robin said she read that they were saying medical marijuana is a crock but Whoopi doesn't seem to believe that. Whoopi said there are many people who will tell you it's not a crock. She said that it helps people get up to eat and go to work.
Howard said he read about weed that won't get you high but it works medically. Whoopi said they are developing a line of topicals for women. She said that women's productivity goes down during their period and this will help.
Howard said they're getting the heave ho from her people. Whoopi had to get going. Howard said that she's a scientist, an actress, an author, an executive producer and a lover of Howard Stern and Robin Quivers. Howard said she's a lover of many men too. Howard said that her book is out now. Howard gave her some plugs and wrapped up with her. They went to break after that. They played Sia performing ''Diamonds'' in the Howard Stern Show studio as they were going to break.
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Howard got Wolfie on the phone and Wolfie asked if he was going to get to Retro-Con. Howard said this is another one of those conventions that should be called ''Loser-Con.'' Howard said they're depressing. Howard said they're still living at home and still living in the comic book world. Howard said he's kind of grown up but these guys haven't. Wolfie said he could go to one every weekend. He said they're non-stop. Howard said he went with Mick the Nerd and he played some of this stuff already. Wolfie said it was only like 3 clips.
Howard said this took place a couple of months ago. He said this is the one where the Micro Machines guy did the love tape speaking really fast. Howard played some of that and said it is pretty remarkable that he is understandable. Wolfie said that Mick tried to do it back to him and it didn't go as well. Howard played some of that and Mick was speaking fast but not like the Micro Machines guy. Mick likes to talk about gardening according to Wolfie so that's why he mentioned tomatoes in that clip.
Howard said the convention seems like a sad group. Wolfie said it seems to be the guys who can't afford a regular comic-con. He said this one is cheaper.
Howard played a clip of Mick the Nerd trying to name as many Star Trek characters as he can in 30 seconds. Mick was naming a bunch but he was struggling with it.
Howard played another clip of Wolfie and Mick asking people to name as many Star Trek characters as they could. One guy named a bunch and freaked out when he wasn't able to come up with more. Howard said he's a Star Trek fan but he couldn't do it either. Howard played another clip of guys naming Star Wars characters too. Howard said that's real nerd speak.
Howard said he likes this next guy. He said you can tell he's an older guy. Howard played the clip and the guy was talking about how he's 36 and he has thousands of toys in his house. He has them in 3 different rooms. The guy said that he has the toys instead of a car so he had to take the bus there. Howard said that guy has a wife. Howard said that's a shock. Howard said she's probably happy that he's out of the house. Howard said if you're with a guy who mentions his toys then head for zee hills. Howard said Ralph had a girlfriend and when she saw all of the toys he had she headed for zee hills. Howard did his impression of Ralph talking about his toys. Howard said Ralph claims he has sold a few. He claims he made a few bucks too. Howard said he asked Ralph why he would bring a girl home to his apartment with all of those toys there. Robin said she has heard it described and he has all kinds of cardboard cut outs and things.
Howard said Ralph came over the other day and this guy sent him this piece of shit thing that he was going to throw out. Howard said Laura looked at it and said Ralph might be interested in it. Howard said he took it out of the trash and re-wrapped it. Howard said he gave it to him and Ralph wrapped it up and took it home. Howard said he had thrown it out and Ralph took it home. Howard said Ralph doesn't have a big apartment so he wonders where he puts it all.
Robin wondered what Ralph did for Halloween. Howard said he knows what he did. He said he should call in to talk about it. Howard said Heidi Klum invited him to that big party she held. Howard said Ralph made a costume himself and it required many facial molds and stuff. Howard said it was a bust though because he spent hours putting that stuff on. Howard said he was barely able to keep a straight face hearing it. Howard said he didn't get to the party until 12:30 in the morning. Howard said he asked why he wasn't on time and Ralph said he didn't even want to talk about it. Howard said Ralph told him that he designed the costume very complicated. He said Ralph told him he put it on and some of the prosthetic pieces broke apart so he had to design a new costume. He said he sat at home frantically working on it and he was all upset he didn't get there until 12:30. Howard said he has lost his fucking mind.
Howard said he has learned not to laugh during stories like that. He said he learned that in therapy. He said he keeps a straight face the whole time during that story. Howard said people won't open up if you laugh at them.
Howard said just listen to this guy talking about his toys. Howard played a clip of that guy talking about the three rooms of toys in his house.
Howard played a clip of a guy singing the Transformers theme song. That guy refused to say when he lost his virginity. Howard had Fred play the ''Shame'' clip from Game of Thrones. Howard asked if it's fair to say that if you know the whole Transformers song that you are king of the dipshits.
Wolfie asked at what age you have to stop your kids if they're into this stuff. Howard said it's hard to get someone off of their heroin. Robin said Rod Stewart has toy trains. She said if it's the only thing you do then it's a problem. Howard said he's decompressing from a real life. Howard said if you live with your parents and you're 45-50 then you don't need decompressing. Robin said you're depressing. Howard thanked Wolfie and went to break after that.
Howard said that was Richard and Sal as Jack and Rod. Howard asked who Robin likes best. Robin said she thinks Jack in that one. Howard said he likes Rod because that's a name for penis.
Howard said he got a story about Richard and Sal. He said things just get weirder and weirder. Howard said Richard had to sneeze so he sneezed into his collar and then wiped his nose with the inside of his shirt. Howard said even more disgusting is that he's wearing that shirt again today. Howard said he's disgusting. Howard asked how he's married.
Richard came in walking funny. Howard said he walks like he has a dick in his ass. Richard said he had a pulled muscle in his calf from running. He said he has been trying to fix it. Howard asked if he sneezes into his shirt and wears it again today it's gross. Howard asked if it occurs to him to put it in the wash. Richard said he didn't think about it. Howard said he used it like a tissue. Richard said he will sneeze into it again today. He said he knows it's probably disgusting. Howard asked if they'd see snot inside the shirt. Richard said he can look. Fred said he was pretty phlegmy yesterday. Howard said he is vile.
Howard said he never sneezes into his shirt. He said he will sneeze into his hand and wash his hands. He said either that or he'll sneeze into the crook of his arm. Howard asked if Richard thinks that's gross. Richard said he's keeping it away from people so it's only touching him.
Howard said he has Mitt Romney (Fake Mitt) on the phone. Howard said it's nice to hear from him from time to time. Howard took the call and they had pre-recoded clips of the Mitt Romney impersonator talking to Howard. Howard talked to Mitt and asked what's going on with the republican party because it's a mess. Mitt said the front runnier is black so it's a disaster. Howard asked about Trump. Mitt said that he has no experience in government and what's sickening is that he barely hates gays. Howard asked if Hillary can win. Mitt said he thinks she'll be very formidable by next November if she can grow a penis. Howard let Mitt go after a few minutes of talking to the pre-recorded clips.
Howard said they should go on tour bashing every city. Fred played some of what they usually play. Howard said he doesn't know much of their stuff. Howard said this song sounds good though. Gary said he'd know the song ''Voodoo'' and Fred played some of that for him. Howard didn't know the song. Fred played Robin singing to go along with that. Howard said he really doesn't know the song but it sounds pretty good. Fred said they do some covers too. He played them covering ''Rocky Mountain Way.'' Howard said they might have him there. Howard said Joe Walsh is the best. Fred played Robin singing over that too. Howard liked that cover. He said he might have to have them in there.
Howard had Fred play some more of Godsmack's stuff. Fred played them covering Led Zeppelin ''Good Times, Bad Times.'' Howard told Gary to remind him to download that. Howard said he should have them in so he can give them some tips on how to do the song. Howard said he'd like to hear the drummer banging harder. Howard said good job to the guys in Godsmack. Howard said he likes that they did that thing about the Seahawks.
Howard asked if Tom Brady has been able to play this season. Robin said yes. Gary said they're killing it this year too. He said that this is what happens when you piss off Tom Brady. Gary said he's been on fire since day one.
Howard asked about using a player like that in the fantasy football league. Gary said that Matt Berry has him in their league. Gary said he's in first place right now. Howard said he has been following the league and he likes Michael Rapaport's reaction to the whole thing. Howard said he was up against Jon Hein this weekend. He said he was wining but then Jon surged ahead. Howard said he was listening to Rapaport's rant and he really can't deal with it. Howard played some audio from Rapaport's podcast where he's moaning and whining about his loss to Jon Hein. Howard said he can't imagine caring about something that much. Howard said he wasn't even shit talking Jon.
Howard said that they have a musical thing going on with Asian Pete and Elephant Boy too. Howard played a bit they did where they had the two of them singing different love duets. They also had Big Foot singing some Christmas songs. Howard said the funny thing is that Elephant Boy laughs at Asian Pete. Howard said that he is sort of understandable compared to Pete. Howard said it's rather soothing to hear Elephant Boy. Howard said they should put him on The Voice as a goof. Howard played some of Asian Pete singing too.
Howard said that Asian Pete plays him in the Private Parts bit. He said they have a whole video thing going on with that. Howard said he thinks he's more of an Asian Pete singing guy. He played more examples of Pete and Elephant Boy singing. Howard said Elephant Boy is too coherent.
Howard said Adele came out with a new album and Eli Braden already came out with a song about Robin to one of her songs. Howard played that for Robin. Howard said that's pretty cool. Robin said she can't wait for that song to go to number one so she can sing it too.
Howard said he has 3 pages on his computer of just Robin songs. He said he's trying to get to them all. Howard said Psych has a new one. Howard played Psych's new one for Robin where he sings about her fucking herself with a cucumber. Howard said it's great when these guys sing about how great it would be for Robin to let them fuck her. He said they think it would be so much better for her.
Howard played another song parody for Robin to the tune of a Foghat song. Howard said he thought that was a nice one. Howard said she's not forcing her to do anything sexual. He just wants to hear Robin's news.
Howard took a call from a guy who said Fred played Sia's ''Diamonds'' and he thought it was great. He said they should do a special where they just play songs from the show. Howard said that Sia wrote that song. The caller said it gave him goose bumps. Howard said she's some singer and writer. Howard said he was watching Saturday Night Live and Sia was the musical guest. Howard said she insists on wearing a wig over her face when she sings. Howard said it's upsetting. Howard said she's great fun to watch singing. Howard said she was great in the studio there. Howard said he told her to stop with the wig. Howard said he wants to see what's going on there. Howard said he likes seeing her face. Howard played some of her ''Diamonds'' performance from there in the studio. Howard said that was a great moment. He said he was moved that day too. Howard said he's going to keep listening. He let the caller go. Howard said he should be hiding his face with a wig, not Sia. Howard said he might go to that look.
Howard sang along with the Sia song. Howard said if you're not moved by that then there's something wrong with you. Howard said that's what Larry King used to say in that column he had.
Howard said he has a couple more things to play. He had some audio of Hillary Clinton coughing at her 11 hour Benghazi hearing. Howard played the clip where she was coughing and had to stop talking. She had to take a minute to get back to talking after her coughing fit. Howard said the senators were covered in lugies from Clinton. Fred played a clip of a girl who sneezes constantly.
Howard took a call from Sour Shoes who was splashing around in the tub or something. Howard said it's better when he's Gary. Sour said he's going to call Mike Francesa as Artie Lange, Gary and Artie Lange. Howard said this morning in the hall he was talking to JD and Gary was out there clearing his throat. Howard said it was constant. Howard played a song parody where they had Gary clearing his throat. Howard said that's his nightmare. They went to break after that.
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Howard took a call from Hillary Clinton (clips) who had some things to say about Benghazi. Howard asked what she had to say. They had Hillary coughing and not being able to speak. Howard let her go a short time later since she just kept coughing. Howard said she sounds like his producer. Howard asked Hillary to cough twice if she thinks Ted Cruz is an asshole. They had her cough twice. Howard asked her questions and had her answer with a number of coughs. Howard had her cough twice if she wanted to sleep with Robin. She did that. Howard had her cough twice if she wanted Ronnie's Nuvaring inside her. She did that too. Howard had her cough twice if she thinks Benjy is funny. She only coughed once. She only coughed once for Bobo's calls being funny. Howard and Robin went back and forth with question after question for her.
Howard asked Hillary to cough once if she thinks Fred has a big dick. She did that. She also coughed to say yes that she'd suck Chris Christie's cock. Howard had her cough twice if she's never shaved her vagina. She did that. Robin asked her to cough how many times a week she and Bill have sex. It was one. She coughed about 15 times for how many times a week she uses a vibrator on herself. Howard asked if this was going on too long. Howard said he was enjoying it.
Robin said Keith Richards has skulls that she saw in a documentary about him. Robin said she wonders what it is about skulls that's so fascinating.
Howard said he should do the top 5 songs. He said he has a bunch of stuff to get to. He said Big Foot will be stopping by tomorrow. Howard played the top 5 songs and had Justin Bieber at number 5. He had High Pitch Eric singing that song. Howard said he woke up thinking about the ''I'll Suck Your Ween'' song. He said it's weird to have that stuck in your head. Robin said it is hip to her now. She likes the real song. Howard said he likes it too. Howard said it would be so great if he did their song parody in concert.
Howard played number 4 with JD singing The Weeknd's ''The Hills.'' Howard said High Pitch Eric did a better job with it than JD did. Howard played that version and the real song too. Howard said JD is the worst singer. Howard asked what is wrong with JD. JD said he didn't know what he was singing so he made it up. Robin said that you can't understand what the guy is actually singing. Howard said JD is awful and JD told him to fuck off. Howard said he's his boss so try to have some respect. Howard played more of JD singing another song in the top 5. That was Hotline Bling from Drake. Howard said they have to go to a karaoke night with him so they can just laugh.
Howard said that Justin Bieber has another song in the top 5. Howard had JD singing that one. They had another gay version of that song they created. Howard said number 1 is Adele. Robin let out an ''Ohhh'' when she heard that. Robin said she wants to go back and sing that one. Howard said she can belt that one out. Howard said that would be comparable to her Whitney Houston song. Howard said they have to get her in the studio. Howard played some of the Adele song and said she has a beautiful voice. Howard had JD singing that song. Howard said JD is bad at everything. He said some stutterers can sing but JD can't talk or sing. He said he's good at eating though.
Howard took a call from a guy who was calling from Seymour, Missouri. Howard wondered how many Jews could be in Missouri. Fred looked it up and it was over 59,000. He said in Montana there are over 1000. Howard said Richard never met one in Kansas. Howard said when he was studying in for a license in college he knew guys who didn't know any Jews. He said they didn't know he was a Jew. Howard said they thought that Jews had horns. Howard said this was in West Virginia. Howard said that he was maybe 20 years old. He said they were convinced that they'd see horns on a Jew. Howard said maybe they though that they had their horns shaved down to be on TV.
Robin started her news with a story about a Civil War reenactment in Oklahoma where a guy fired an actual weapon. Robin said he wanted to go to war for real apparently. Robin said the guy was arrested while holding a sawed off shotgun. Robin said he shot toward a tent with 9 other actors inside.
Howard had Jeff the Drunk on the phone and asked if he's doing Periscope. Jeff said he doesn't know. Howard told him to turn it off. Shuli said he's told him to shut it off many times and he doesn't listen. Howard said he's a drunk and a bore. Howard asked what this appearance is that he's doing. Howard told him to get off Periscope. Jeff said he's not on. Gary said they're looking at him now. Jeff said he is off. He said he was on.
Howard had The Lump on the phone. Howard said that you gotta love The Lump. Howard asked Shuli what's going on with this promo. Shuli said he's doing a show in a venue where he can cook. He's going to be cooking at this thing. He said he's going to do a Q and A with the audience and then do some karaoke. He said it's 3 hours long. Howard said people will be bored after 5 minutes. Howard said Jeff has to be back on Periscope because he's echoing again. Jeff said he's not on. Shuli said he does the Periscope with the show playing in the background. He said he's told him to stop. Jeff said he's not on Periscope. The Lump made an echoing sound for him. Jeff said ''Fuck you lump.''
Howard read that Jeff is charging people $35 to watch that California show on Periscope. Shuli said there's no reason to leave his trailer. Howard told Jeff to get off Periscope. Jeff said he's not on. The echo kept popping up. Howard had The Lump tell them what's wrong with him. The Lump said he's on Periscope. Jeff said he's not on. Howard said he's not going to pick up on him if he keeps lying about it. Jeff screamed that he's not on it.
Howard said according to Jeff's web site the dress code is business causal or nicer. Shuli laughed. He said he saw what Jeff is going to be wearing.
Howard said that you have to hear this promo that Jeff cut. Howard said it's pretty funny. Howard played the clip and Jeff got in a plug for his appearance on December 2nd in Gardena, California. He said he'll be baking brownies and then he'll do a Q and A and then Karaoke. Jeff said everyone attending will get an 8x10 signed autograph. The Lump said his delivery is deader than his arm. Jeff got in a plug for his web site in that promo too. Jeff had to tell The Lump to shut the hell up since he was talking over the promo. Jeff told Howard to play it again since he talked over the whole thing. Shuli said they were making it entertaining so people would listen. Shuli said they lost the first version and Jeff said he thought he did the second one really well. Howard said his favorite part was when he said ''There will be cooking, then Q and A, then Karaoke and then Q and A.'' He said he fucked up and didn't know that he had just fucked up.
Howard asked if he has sold one ticket. Jeff said he has sold half. Howard said he's back on Periscope. Jeff said it's fucking off. The echo was back. Howard said he's hanging up on him. Howard said fuck you to Jeff. Shuli said Jeff came to a show up in Albany and he spent the whole show talking to people on Periscope.
Shuli said that Jeff is going to have an $800 bill for his cell phone because he refuses to get Wi-Fi. Howard said that he knows Jeff is back on Periscope. Jeff said he's not on. Howard said he knows he is and he's hanging up. Howard let The Lump go and said goodbye to Jeff. Jeff said he swears he's not on. Howard hung up on him and did a live commercial read.
Robin read a story about Hillbilly Jack dying in a fire. Robin said he fell asleep while cooking. Howard said they had a contest years ago to find a new Wack Packer and Jack won. Howard said he wasn't on much more after that. Robin said his name was Jack Rushman and he was considered a local celebrity because he was on the show. Robin said his death was reported on Saturday. Howard asked Gary if they have any clips of Jack to play. Gary said he had to check. Howard said that's terrible. Gary said he has clips of Jack laughing. Howard played some of those clips. Gary said he was only on the show that one time. Howard said he's sorry to hear about that. Robin said he was only 55 years old. Howard said that's a horrible way to go. Robin said at least he was asleep.
Robin read a story where they had 7 signs that your wife isn't happy. Robin read some of the things on the list. Howard asked Sal if any of this sounds familiar.
Robin read a story about a debate going on about what a hot dog is and if it's a sandwich or not. Howard said he would say no. Robin said they say that it's considered a category unto itself.
Robin read a story about Chris Christie signing a measure that makes it a crime to participate in bestiality in New Jersey. Howard said that's a good law. He said you'd think that would have been on the books already. Robin said there are still 10 states without a law on the books about it. Howard said you'd think that would be something no one would be into.
Robin said Pamela Anderson claims she's been cured of Hepatitis C. Robin said she was on a program that said it might cure her. Robin said she posted on Instagram that she has been cured. Howard said if that's true then why not try that for everyone who has Hep C. Robin said she hopes that story is true.
Robin read a story about how Seaworld is going to stop Killer Whale shows by 2017. Robin said some groups hope that they close those Orca whale tanks all together. Robin said they're still going to lock them up. Robin said that's terrible. She said they should just let them go. Howard said they look like a lump of shit anyway so why go see them? Howard said they look like the shits he takes. Howard said if you want to see a whale then look in a book. Robin said she heard about someone going to swim with the dolphins recently. Howard said he did that once but he didn't go in. He said he was against it from the start. He said that they sat on the dock and this guy had them sticking fish in their mouths to give to the dolphins and the guy was a jokester. He said that his friends got in the water with the dolphins and it wasn't that amazing. Howard said they don't want to be stuck swimming with people. He said they'd rather be out swimming on their own.
Robin read about the debates that are on tonight. Robin had some details about that. She had some clips for Howard to play. That led to Howard talking about what some of these guys should do.
Howard asked if Gary has anymore audio of Hillbilly Jack. Gary said he'll have more up in about 30 seconds. Robin was still talking about the debates.
Robin read a story about Donald Trump taking on Starbucks with the Christmas coffee cup controversy. Robin said he's calling for a boycott on the company. Robin said that he's going to fight against the war on Christmas. Robin had audio of Trump talking about that.
Howard took a call from a woman whose phone was making weird noises so Howard asked if she was Periscoping. The caller said she loves JD but she has to rat him out. She said that she heard that a sex tape exists from his days at Full Sail. JD said he didn't get laid at Full Sail. The caller said there are people who say he was kind of freaky and he did get laid there. The caller asked if JD knows someone named Amber. JD said he knows some Ambers but not from those days. Howard said JD didn't get laid until he met him. The caller said that she knows a girl named Ellen who says it's real. JD said he doesn't know an Ellen. The caller said that she just thought she'd pass it on so they can investigate. Howard thanked her for the call. The caller said she keeps singing ''I'll Suck Your Ween'' so please stop playing it. Howard said he wants to hear her sing it. She did sing it a little bit. Howard wanted to hear more of it. She said she just sings ''I'll suck your ween'' over and over. Howard played the so she can sing the next line. She didn't want to do it. She said she just called in to talk about JD. Howard asked JD if he got laid at Full Sail. JD said he did not have sex at Full Sail. He said he doesn't know who these people are. The caller kept going and Howard cut her off saying ''Oh who cares'' and then hung up on her. Howard played the new Justin Bieber song parody and then did a live commercial read.
Howard said they did find some audio of Hillbilly Jack. Howard played a clip where Howard first spoke to Jack on the show during the Wack Packer contest. As soon as he heard his voice he told Jack he won. Howard found out he still lives with his mom at the age of 50. Howard said rest in peace Hillbilly Jack. Howard said they did lose touch with him after that. Howard said he fell asleep cooking and the house caught on fire. Howard wondered how that happens. Robin said it must have flamed up somehow.
Robin read a story about the university of Missouri and some racial tensions going on there. Robin said they have asked the head of the college to step down and that's what he did yesterday. Robin had some audio of the guy talking about taking full responsibility for what had occurred.
Robin read about President Obama meeting with the president of Israel. She had some audio of Obama talking about that.
Robin read a story about an experimental music duo that will be composed entirely of washing machine sounds. Howard played a clip of JD singing a song. Howard then played a clip of the washing machine music. Howard said it's like Blue Man Group where they bang on the machines like drums.
Robin read about a new TV spot for the new Star Wars movie. Robin had some audio from that. Howard said he's not going to the theater for that. He said he's just staying home. He said he is getting kind of excited about it though. Howard said JJ Abrams probably did a good job with it. Howard said he did a good job with Star Trek.
Robin said Sal was in there screaming about the homeless yesterday. Howard said he was on fire over that and the mall without the Christmas decorations. Robin said the mall is bringing back the decorations. Robin said maybe they'll take care of the homeless now that Sal has vented about that.
Gary said he was talking to Sal bringing up the Christmas thing and making it a religious thing. He said Sal told him the Christmas tree is Christ because Christ is in the name. Howard asked why he talks to him. Gary said he could talk to him all day long.
Robin read a story about a Bill Cosby accuser. Robin had some details about this woman who claims Cosby assaulted her in 1965.
Robin read about how flame grilling meat can create carcinogens. Robin said that they say that it's especially true for charred meat. Howard played their Justin Bieber song parody after hearing that.
Robin read about how Pizza Hut is offering up the triple treat box. Howard said he loves pizza but you have to be desperate to eat that shit. Howard said maybe if you live somewhere there's not good pizza. Howard said they must be making a fortune. Robin said it's like cardboard that passes for pizza. Robin said the triple treat box has two pizza, bread sticks and a pizza sized chocolate chip cookie. Robin said they sell that for $20.
Robin said that Justin Bieber was on Ellen talking about Selena Gomez yesterday. Robin had some audio of him talking about how they could get back together but they're just trying to figure themselves out. Robin had some audio of Justin talking about the nude shots of himself that he saw online. Howard said he knew what he was doing. Howard said there is no accident there. Howard said he should just admit he knew what he was doing.
Robin wrapped up and Howard ended the show after that. They were done around 11:05am.
Jon said Howard was into comic books but he doesn't get these people who collect the stuff and get into it like these people do. Gabrus said that he knew as soon as he saw Star Wars that it was where he wanted to be. Jon asked if he's fired up for the new one. Gabrus said he has tickets already for opening night. He said he's super pumped. Howard asked if he's embarrassed or proud. Gabrus said he cut school to go see the Phantom Menace. He said he got the tickets, saw the movie and didn't like it. He said it shattered his world. Jon said he saw that on opening night and people were trying to justify that it was good because there hadn't been a Star Wars in so long. Gabrus said that people were trying to find the good parts of the movie.
Jon asked if Gabrus can see Howard going to a movie on opening night. Gabrus said he thinks he'd go to see how people are dressed up.
Jon said they got a call from a student of Bobo's and now he's defending his work. He said Bobo has won a lot of awards. He was a defensive driving teacher and he won awards for that. Jon asked if Gabrus is one of those guys who can't stand Bobo. Gabrus said that he enjoys Bobo.
Jon asked Rahsaan if he heard Bobo getting upset with that woman who called in. Rahsaan said he just thinks about how he's teaching people how to drive and if you need a class to teach you then you're one of the shittiest drivers in the world.
Jon said he doesn't blame Bobo for taking pride in what he did. Gabrus said that's such a weird thing to brag about. He got awards for his driving. Rahsaan said he talks about it like it's a Nobel Peace Prize. Jon said it is that to him.
Gary said there are a lot of awards that he could get rid of. He said some of them may diminish the other awards he has. They goofed on Bobo for rattling off awards he won back in 1996 and 97. The guys spent a little more time talking about that before moving on.
Jon took a call from a woman who said she feels so bad for Bobo. She said that's all he's got and just leave him alone. She said all she has is a cheerleading award from 8th grade. She said just leave him alone. Gary said if she had an award from every year she ''cheerleaded'' then they'd be goofing on her. The caller said that they should just leave Bobo alone.
Jon said he thinks a lot of people do like Bobo. Jon asked Gabrus what award he has. He had a football award from high school. Jon said he has an MVP from high school baseball.
Jon took a call from a guy who said he was chiming in on the Star Wars thing. He said he has a big collection but he has a wife and kid too. He said it irritates him when Howard says it's pathetic. He said they could say the same about Howard's painting. He said he goes to Comic-Con and he has stuff that's worth a lot of money. Jon asked what he has. The caller said he has a Boba Fett statue that he got autographed. He also said he got married on May 4th which is Star Wars day. Gary said it sounds like a hobby more than his life. Jon said it did until he said he was married on the 4th. The caller said it was his wife's idea to get married on that day. They spent a little more time with that caller and then went to break.
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Jon asked if Gary can ever see Howard going the vape route. Gary said he can see Howard admiring it but not putting that in his body. Gary said Howard won't even ingest antibiotics so he's not going to vape. Gabrus said the defense of marijuana is that it's natural but then you mix it with that other stuff and it is kind of not natural after that. The guys talked about the carcinogen discussion they had on the show today. Gary said he hasn't had hot dogs in a long time. He said that they have so much more to eat when you go to the stadiums for a game these days. He said he's not a big fan of hot dogs. He said he'll get a burger instead.
Jon said Whoopi was talking about how you have to be truthful to friends who might have bad breath or something like that. Gary said they have tried that there and you have to be really close to them to do that. He said it can hurt them if you're not careful about something like that.
Gary said Jon was in an office in the past. He asked if he ever had to do something like that. Jon said he did and it didn't go over well. He said that he told the guy trying to help him. He said the guy would zing him from time to time but he also thanked him for helping him. Jon said that if Howard tells you something there it will stick. He said if someone else does it then it may not. Jon tried to take a call but the caller wasn't there so they went to break instead.
Jon took a call from a guy who said Bobo is not a Defensive Driving instructor. He said he is a boring offensive caller though. Jon asked if he's on the Bobo hate train. The caller said he doesn't care either way. He said here was a caller who had a very Bobo-Esqe question and he wondered if he was Bobo's son. Jon gave the caller a $500 prize and a Ninja Coffee Bar. The caller thanked him very much.
Jon took a call from Michael Rapaport and said he's humbly calling because he took a beating in fantasy football. He said he's trying to bounce back from it. He said this is the mean streak in Baba Booey. He said he knows he's smiling. Michael said he was calling to tell Gary that he could not make it to the event at his house. He said he told his lady that he doesn't have the heart to do it. He said he had to change shit around because of work. He said he talked shit about the menu and all of that. He said that he actually changed his flight and he going to make it. Gary said he'd love to have him there but don't kill yourself. Rapaport said he should be kissing his feet. He said he just changed his flight and it cost him $1,200. Rapaport said he isn't going to speak to him in his own home when he gets there. Rapaport said he has to say thank you. Gary said he didn't want to put pressure on him. Gary said it's not every day that he can get a B-Celebrity to come to his house. Rapaport said that Jon is going out of his way to get there too. Jon said he is but Gray told him not to kill himself either.
Jon said he thinks that Rapaport was more upset about not making it to Gary's house than he was about him beating him. Gary said that Jason and JD won't be able to make it and he didn't have the heart to tell Michael that. He said he can't cancel it because he made such a big deal out of it. Gary said Rapaport isn't the sun and he's more like Venus. Gary said if he had told him what was going on he could have moved things around. Gary said the reason he's doing this on the day he's doing it is because they're off the next day. He said that's why he does this date every year.
The guys went back and forth for a few minutes. Michael asked Gabrus what he thinks about Gary and if he thinks that he's an ungrateful gorilla. Gabrus said he could have feigned some gratitude. Gary said if it's a struggle for him he doesn't want him to be pained to be there. Michael said he should look around and see who is around him and how they're canceling left and right. Gary said they didn't cancel. He said that JD is going to see his family and so is Jason. He said they let him know immediately. Gary said he continued on because he knew what it meant to Michael.
Gary and Michael kept going with that. Michael wanted to move it to the 6th of December but Jon said he thinks Matt Berry is busy on that day. Michael said he's open to both days. He said he wants to see Gary and his kids Jackson and ''Larry''. Gary said if they do it on the 6th they all have to get up early the next morning. Gary said he'd rather not do that. Michael said he's not going to miss the party either way.
Jon said he's getting the sign to wrap this up. Michael asked who is giving him that. Michael said he's going to have his own party and he's going to give gifts to people who go out of their way to come. Jon let him go after that.
Jon got in some Sternthology plugs and wrapped up the show. They were done around 11:55am.
Howard started the show talking about Jeff the Drunk's ''Chello''. Howard said later in the show he's going to play the most disgusting cough of Jeff's. He said it goes on and on forever. He said it's crazy. Howard said it's too early to play it now.
Howard said they got a lot of email about something yesterday. He said it's the most they've ever gotten over something. Howard said they got a lot about Bobo. He had Bobo on the phone and told him that people aren't impressed with his driving instructor awards. Howard said people think he should be deported to ''Stupidland.'' Bobo asked if they're setting him up. Howard said he's not. Fred said he only puts in what people think is truthful about him. Howard read a few more about Bobo where people said they're not impressed with his awards.
Howard said Bobo's phony phone call where he's listing all of his awards is quite something. Howard thanked Bobo for that. Howard played a humiliating song for Bobo before letting him as a question. Bobo asked Howard if he ever dated a guest off the show when he was dating. Howard said he has talked many times about that on the air and he's answered it many times. Howard said he would ask Gary to get numbers and Gary would say he didn't think he was serious. Howard asked what kind of question that is. Bobo said he didn't remember him talking about it. Bobo said he tried. Howard said he sounds down now. Bobo said he really forgot. Howard said he has talked about dating people from the show so many times. Howard said it was before Beth. Bobo said he didn't remember him saying it was from people on the show.
Howard had Bobo's Toupee on the phone and Bobo's Toupee said that he was waiting to hear if his question was going to be stupid. Robin said she thought they were supposed to call him Hair System. Howard said that's right. He spent a minute talking to Bobo's Hair System about that question writing process.
Howard played the prank call Chris Wilding made to a radio show using clips of Bobo giving a rundown of his driving instructor awards.
Howard said that woman in the call was such a sweetheart. Howard took a call from a guy who said he was curious about Corey Feldman and if Howard saw Corey and his angels. The caller said he can't remember when he saw him last. He wondered where he gets his money. Howard said Corey was a child actor and a very successful one. Howard said he invested in Apple and 4 percent of his portfolio is that. Howard said Corey is a financial genius. Howard said 17 percent is in mutual funds. Howard told the caller about some of his other income and the guy sounded like he knew Howard was just making this stuff up. Howard said Corey is also getting income from hid dividends. Howard said he also owns part of Uber. Howard said some of it is from tax free munis. Howard said that's how Corey makes money. Howard asked the caller how the fuck he'd know how he makes his money.
Robin said she thinks that the guy wanted to know how Corey is supporting the women he has in his angels. Howard asked how he'd know. Howard said he does know something about Butch Patrick's income. Howard said Butch bet on the right stocks. Howard said he's very well set up. Howard asked who else's finances you want to know about. He said he thinks they're done. Howard asked what kind of day this is going to be.
Howard asked what Mark in Boston had to say. Mark said he wanted to thank Howard for his service in Vietnam. He also did his impression of Richard's dad saying ''How about them Royals.'' Howard said they went out on the street and asked people what they are doing on Veteran's day. He said some people got upset about them asking. Howard played some clips and people were talking about their regular day and not doing anything special to honor veterans. Some people confused them for Veterinarians. Howard said shame on them. Fred played the Game of Thrones ''Shame'' clip. Howard played a Veteran's Day clip where they salute Howard's service and play some clips of his made up Nam stories.
Howard said they could have won that war. He said he was known as El Kabong over there. Howard said that makes no sense since that's Spanish.
Howard got back to email and one guy said he was all for him bringing back the Hollywood Squares game. Howard said he doesn't remember saying that. Howard said he even forgot they had Whoopi Goldberg on the show. Howard said someone wrote about how he sounded like Wendy the Retard answering some of Robin's questions about food yesterday.
Howard said Big Foot has a cleaner bed. JD said okay. Howard said he's having sex every weekend. JD said pretty much. Howard asked if the girlfriend ever asks about it. JD said she hasn't said anything. Howard said Beth is a freak about that stuff. Howard said that he should throw a few sheets into the wash once in a while. JD said he just doesn't think about it. JD said on occasion it dawns on him.
Howard asked how that came up. JD said someone brought it up and he made the mistake of answering honestly. Howard said he must have cum on the sheets. Robin said he might drool. Howard said even the bed bugs left because it's so gross. Howard said he lives in America. He said he should be cleaning them. JD said he knows. Howard asked if he ever eats in bed. JD said no. Howard said he must. JD said he never does.
Howard asked who brought this up. JD said it was Nick. He said Nick was asking him how often he does his laundry. He said he does that once a week. Howard said he must be making that up too. JD said he really does it once a week. Howard said he has to be lying. JD said this is why he can't do this. Howard said he knows what he's up to.
Howard asked what Nick said to him. JD said he asked about the sheets and he said it's been a while. He said he can't lie so he told him. Howard asked if he went home and washed the sheets. JD said he got ridiculed yesterday but he hasn't washed them yet. Howard asked why he'd rush to do that. Gary said it could be longer than a year. JD said it's not longer. Howard asked what made him wash them a year ago. JD said the girlfriend if he did. Gary said JD said he got new sheets when he got his Casper bed. He said that may have been over a year ago. JD said he had to buy new ones for the bed. He didn't even wash those when he bought them.
Howard said he's surprised the girlfriend didn't correct him on that. Robin said they could fall apart if he washes them now. Howard said maybe they're like old socks with holes in them. Howard said they should get a blue light and go inspect the bed. He said he'd love to see that. Robin said she wants to swab the bed to see what grows.
Howard asked JD if he thought about cleaning the sheets after the girlfriend was over. Howard asked what her name is. Howard just went with Sally when JD didn't want to give out her name. Howard played ''Sally'' and asked him about not washing the sheets. JD said he'd get to it. JD said he'll get to them today. Sally said her boyfriend is so gross. JD threw down the headphones and started to walk out. Howard said he's trying to help.
Howard said on the phone is JD's Sheets. Howard took the call and it was The Lump / Bobo's Toupee calling in about how he has more jizz than cotton. Howard spent a few seconds with him and JD said goodbye to him. JD told him to get out of here. The sheets said the only thing with more jizz on them are his t-shirts. Howard said JD ran out of there to go beat up his sheets. JD was still in there.
Howard kept up his Sally voice and goofed on JD. Howard said that the Bed Sheets have to keep calling in. Howard said that JD keeps promising to clean them. Howard said he was thinking about donating his sheets to the KKK so they put them on and die. JD's sheets kept goofing on JD and JD would get mad and say ''fuck you'' to them.
JD's Sheets said that JD is an oily guy and he slobbers all over him too. JD said he had better stay away from him in the office today. Howard said he really has to wash his sheets. Robin said that if you sit on them with clean clothes you should wash the clothes. Howard said Beth tells him that he shouldn't sit on clean sheets when he's been outside all day. Howard said JD is like a 5 year old stuck in a 35 year old body. Howard said he needs to learn how to do that stuff. JD said he gets it. He knows he has to do it.
Howard said Fred had to learn how to do all of that stuff too. Fred said he knew to clean his sheets. Howard said shame on JD and Fred played the Game of Thrones ''Shame'' clip for him.
Howard said it used to drive him crazy when a woman like Robin would talk about using cucumbers and things on herself. Robin said she did it like once or twice when she was a teenager. Howard said he wishes that she would just call him and use his penis. He said that's what the song is about.
Howard said they got praise from Leo from Queens who said he thought Loads was a great song too. Howard played that song parody too. Howard said imagine what that guy's apartment looks like. Howard said that was Leo from Queens. Howard said he got some feedback from a fan who said he just wants Leo's songs and no more Psych and Little Mikey.
Howard said he got a new Robin song parody last night. Howard said it's from Little Mikey and he collaborated with Jess Delfino on this one. Howard said it reminds him of Don Henley collaborating. Howard said Don is actually coming in soon. He played Mikey's new song where he sings with Jess.
Howard said someone created a tribute to Johnny Fratto since he passed away recently. Howard said this song moved him. Howard played the song and it was about Johnny and Eric the Actor. They played a George Takei announcement and then went to break.
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Howard said he has to play that clip of Jeff that's really gross. Howard said this is like a death rattle. He said his lungs are just rebelling. Howard said it's crazy what he's doing to himself. Howard said Jeff was smoking just yesterday. He has no willpower. Howard said he has zero willpower.
Howard said when he quit smoking he was in college. He said he broke his ankle playing basketball. He said he actually tore the ligaments in his ankle. He said he was just sitting around but he didn't start smoking again. Howard said when he says he's going to do something he does it. Robin asked why he's comparing himself to Jeff. Howard said he always wins when he does.
Jeff said he's a defeated man. He was going to explain that but he gave up quickly. Howard asked when Jeff washed his sheets last. Jeff said two weeks ago. Howard said Jeff has one arm and he washes his sheets. JD told Jeff to shut up.
Howard had The Lump on the phone. The Lump said hello to the asshole and asked how he's doing. Jeff gave a quick hey to him. Howard said he got a negative email about The Lump. The Lump said that Jeff feels defeated and so did Jeff's mom when Jeff was born.
Howard said this is Jeff on his Periscope coughing. Howard said it was right after a big hit from a bong. Howard said it's pretty intense. Jeff said they sent him a replacement bong. Howard didn't understand what he was talking about. Robin said that's because he broke his last one. The Lump said Robin understands ''idiot.''
Howard played the clip of Jeff taking the hit and then coughing for about 30 seconds. Howard asked what's going on there. Robin said his lungs are full of crap and probably dying. Howard asked Jeff if that concerns him. Jeff said not really. Howard said then Jeff calls Shuli and Shuli said the cough continues when he's talking to him. Howard played more audio of Jeff coughing as he's talking to Shuli. Jeff was trying to talk to him but he kept coughing. Jeff kept saying hello but Shuli stayed quiet to let him cough.
Howard said you know that whatever Jeff had to tell Shuli was nothing. Shuli was in and said that he tells him the most useless information. Howard asked what the message was. Shuli said Jeff told him about someone sending him something. Jeff said he called to tell him about the coughing fit. Shuli said he wasn't even able to get that out. Howard thanked Jeff for telling him about that. Jeff said he's thinking about the show.
Shuli said Jeff had quite a scare yesterday. He said he does a mail segment on Periscope. He said that he was opening a letter with his mouth since he only has one arm. Shuli said they should have him in here to show how he does things with the one arm. Howard said he could get an attachment for his arm and get rid of the dead arm. Howard told him to chop off that arm and get an electronic arm. Robin said she's not sure it would work without working nerves. Howard said he could use a clamp on that arm and control it with the good arm.
Shuli said Jeff got a letter from a person who said that the letter had Anthrax in it. He had to call 911. Howard said Jeff should have someone opening his mail for him. Shuli said he calls 911 and they recognized him. He said they asked if it was Jeff. Shuli said Jeff gave out his new phone number since he didn't get off Periscope. Howard said that he needs someone like Gary to produce his show for him. He said he needs someone with gigantic teeth and lips and someone who is phlegmy early in the morning. He said maybe Gary and Jeff could work together.
Howard said from 6:10 to 6:20 Gary is in the hallway clearing his throat. Howard said he should do it in the bathroom. Howard said it sounds like a horse giving birth. Howard and Fred did a duet song where they played clips of Gary and Jeff clearing throats and coughing. Howard said he can make it happen with Dueling Banjos. Howard played the music and played Gary throat clearing while Fred played Jeff coughing. Howard said Fred is getting way into it.
Jeff said he talked to Bubba. He said Bubba told him that at this point he's willing to come back for free. Howard said Bubba was just trying to get rid of him. Howard said that Jeff is some show stopper. He said when he slows everything down... Howard said he doesn't want to get into this because he has Big Foot waiting to come in. Howard said that he broke up with Danielle so they have to catch up on that and some other things that are going on between him and President Obama.
The Lump said that he's going to try to move to Big Foot's taint. Howard said he thinks he should have quit 2 jokes ago. Jeff said he should have quit 5 jokes ago. The Lump said no one is asking him.
Howard said Big Foot has squatters living in his back room that he can't get rid of. Howard said he has to talk to him about that too.
Shuli said that Jeff told him that the Hazmat team was on their way to his trailer. Shuli said he'd be dead if he opened the envelope with his mouth anyway.
Howard read an email where the caller told him about a Muddy Waters song that Foghat remade. Howard had Fred look it up and play the Muddy Waters version and the Foghat version. They threw in some of Robin's singing clips over that. Howard said that people have been emailing about how much they enjoy her singing.
Howard said he downloaded those Godsmack songs yesterday and they were good. Howard said he has to download that Foghat song too.
Howard said Robin sang the top 5 songs yesterday. He said he has to share that with everyone. Howard had her singing the Justin Bieber song, The Weeknd song at number 4 and at number 3 Drake's song. Howard said at number 2 is Justin Bieber again. Howard said at number 1 is Adele. Howard said that's the one she really wanted to sing. Howard and Robin both laughed when they heard her singing that one. Fred played a Tarzan yell over that. Howard cut it off saying that was enough. Howard said that's his alarm clock now. Howard had the raw audio of her singing without the music. Howard said that's beautiful. Howard said it's much better than JD's version. Howard played that too.
Howard read an email from a woman who said she likes his hair longer. Howard said his long hair isn't working out well so he's going to get it cut. He said he doesn't have Toni to help him out every day and it's hard to control. He said he's going to have her cut it shorter.
Howard read an email they got about Sia's version of ''Diamonds'' that they played the other day. Howard said the writer thought that they had never heard it on the show before. Howard said of course they have because she did it on their show. Howard played some of that song. Howard said he thought they cleared that up but apparently not. Howard told Robin to take it away. Robin said she might have to cover that song too. Howard said he thinks so. He did a mashup of Sia and Robin singing two different songs. They went to break after that.
Howard said this is the best song they ever did. Howard said this is some song. Howard said Perry has some voice. Howard said it's no ''I'll Suck Your Ween'' but it's good. Howard said they have two versions of that song. Howard played the first clip of the song that Richard did. Howard said we know that one. He said then they have an opera version that Daniel Mendelson did. Howard played that too. Robin laughed when she heard that. Howard said they also have an A Cappella version of it. Howard played that too. Robin said she loves that version. Howard said he had that recorded just for her.
Howard said they were sitting around yesterday in a meeting and they were wondering how many times they could get the word penis on a radio show. Howard said Richard took the challenge and got the word out on a religious show. Howard played the clip and Richard was talking about a movie that was coming out for the family called ''Peanuts'' but he was saying it ''Penis'' over and over. They kept him on and talked about how positive and uplifting that was. Then Sal called in and asked what the name of it was because it sounded like ''Penis.'' Richard played his son yelling out penis over and over. The host of the show started speaking in tongues and said he erased the negativity from the show with that.
Howard said that's something. He said they asked Richard how many times they could get it out on the show. He said then Sal got in on it and they were all standing around laughing. Howard said they didn't know the guy was going to break into speaking in tongues. Howard said that's the best. Robin asked if he can believe that this is our country where people believe making sounds can make things go away.
Big Foot claims that Danielle tried to smother him too. He said she put her hands over his mouth and tried to kill him. Howard asked if he called the police. Big Foot said he did not. Howard asked what the secret is to a good relationship. Big Foot said it's to keep separate bank accounts. Howard asked if he ended his relationship in a big argument. Big Foot said it didn't. He said he just dropped her off. Howard asked if he has tried to find another relationship. Big Foot said he has but hasn't been able to find one.
Howard asked why he didn't go back to the mail man. Big Foot said that he turned that guy in at the post office. He said that he was stalking him and he didn't want to continue that. Howard asked if he has ever fucked a tree or a hole in the ground. Big Foot said he has not.
Howard said Big Foot is there in New York for Big Foot business. Big Foot said that's right. Howard asked about the people living in his house and how they got in there. Big Foot said it was his EP who refused to leave. Howard said the EP is an assistant to help him out. Big Foot said he's mentally impaired. Big Foot said he has gastritis too. He said he has 4 people staying there with him. He said that he's trying to do an eviction to get them kicked out. He said he sees them there and they won't leave. Howard said they pay zero rent. Big Foot said that's right.
Howard asked Big Foot about his finances and how he pays the bills. Big Foot said he pays them through Pathways. He said he can't write checks so he has someone who does it for him.
Howard said Big Foot claims that President Obama has stolen ideas from him. Howard said Big Foot is such a big celebrity now that he has Obama coming in to iron these things out. Howard said Obama is there in studio today. He had the guys bring in the Obama impersonator. Big Foot said that's not President Obama. The impersonator didn't look like him to Big Foot. Howard said he looks like him to him. Obama said that he has heard that he looks different in person. Big Foot wasn't falling for it.
Howard said Obama looks younger in person. Obama said they say that Black doesn't Crack so maybe he looks younger because of that. Howard said Big Foot had the idea to legalize weed. Howard asked Obama why he stole the idea. Obama said he's not sure he did steal that idea. Big Foot said he had an idea after Katrina to melt bridges and buildings to build roads and things and they stole that idea too.
Howard asked Obama when he found out about Big Foot's pot smoking plan. Obama said he smoked as a fetus. Big Foot didn't know what a fetus was. Howard explained it to him but Big Foot had no idea what they were talking about. Obama said he's on a listening tour and he wants to get some opinions from Big Foot today.
Howard asked Big Foot about his ideas for fixing the roads. Big Foot said that they can build bridges and houses and factories to fix their own roads. Big Foot said Obama agreed with him the day after he said it. Obama said he would like to get his vote. Big Foot said he doesn't vote. He said that he doesn't even vote for President.
Howard said that Big Foot thinks that Obama should have credited him with the road fixing ideas. Obama said he paved the NJ Turnpike as a child so he doesn't see a reason to do that. Howard said he thought this could be worked out but apparently not.
Howard said Big Foot had an idea to have a toaster that burns your image into toast. Big Foot said he came up with that idea with a guy from Burnt Impressions. Howard asked how Obama took that idea. Obama said anything that Big Foot has come up with is pretty much his idea. He said he even came up with ''It is'' after talking. Howard said he's never heard Obama say that before. Obama said he's going to start using that from now on.
Howard asked Big Foot how he'd defeat ISIS. Big Foot said he'd bring some marijuana over there and smoke with them. He said he'd make them come to some treaty... it is. Howard asked Obama when he bathed last. Obama said this morning. Big Foot bathed last night. He said the water wasn't hot enough.
Howard asked what Big Foot thinks of Donald Trump. Big Foot said he thinks he's a guy who doesn't know what to do. Obama said he thinks it's time for a change and he thinks he should get in there. Howard went back and forth having Obama and Big Foot debating about various things. Big Foot said he's all for people being able to marry a pizza. Obama said he would like to legalize marriage to scabies. Big Foot said it's no fun to have that.
Howard asked Big Foot if he'd let a man and a pizza adopt a child. Big Foot said he would. Howard asked what they should do about asteroids that might hit earth. Big Foot said he'd blow them up it is. He said they can point a laser at it and blow it up it is. Howard asked Obama how he'd take care of them. Obama said he'd use NASA and their space exploration it is. Howard said that these are hot button questions.
Howard said he wants to bring up one last topic. Howard said Big Foot wants to sue the state of Vermont. Big Foot said that they keep blackmailing him. Obama asked if he would like him to nuke Vermont. Big Foot said sure. Obama said that Vermont is a friend of his so he'd prefer not to do that. Howard asked if he wanted to nuke it now. Obama said he can do that. Big Foot was asked if he wanted to hit the button. Big Foot said he would. He didn't care that he won't have a home after that. Howard had him hit the button and Big Foot did it without hesitation. Big Foot said he doesn't care. Obama said that's unfortunate but he only has one more year in office so no big deal.
Howard asked if Obama has any regrets letting Big Foot nuke Vermont. Obama said that he was saving it for Syria but they used it on Vermont. Big Foot said he's still alive so he doesn't care. Howard asked if Big Foot can be king of Vermont now. Obama said he can.
Howard thanked Obama for coming in since he's never had a president in there before. Howard asked how they're doing with the fight against obesity. Obama told Howard how that's going. Big Foot said he would fight it by making people go on diets.
Howard said he would vote for Big Foot. He said he's making tons of sense. Howard asked if he's all for killing sharks. Big Foot said he's for it. Howard said he's for blowing up the moon. Big Foot and Obama agreed that keeping it is the best idea. Howard said that they're all enjoying this. Robin asked when they're going to legalize marijuana. Big Foot said that it could help with the deficit. Obama said he's already working on it.
Howard said the big question is if Big Foot finds the president attractive. Big Foot said he would not have sex with him because he might hurt him with his big penis. He said that he has a big job to do and he doesn't want to mess with that. He said he's a pretty hard core fucker. He said that he has rough sex. He said he likes to smoke crack cocaine sometimes. Obama said he can handle a bit penis. He said he can squirt out of his ass too.
Howard said it was a thrill to meet the President. Howard asked where he's off to next. Obama said he has a town hall not far away. Obama said he's also issuing an executive order to make JD clean his sheets. Howard let Obama go after that.
Howard said this is some morning. He said Big Foot handled himself very well in the debate. Big Foot asked if he can help him out so he can buy a turkey for Thanksgiving. Howard said he should have people helping him out with that. Howard wrapped up and said that he has to let Big Foot go. Gary came in and took him out. Howard said that was some debate. He said it was better than last night's debate. Howard said theirs made no sense though. Howard asked where they dug up their President. Gary said they went through a few before finding him. Gary said Will found him. Howard said he thinks Big Foot won the debate. Howard said he had to take a break after that. They played an Arnold Schwarzenegger bit before going to break.
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Howard said he thinks that question he asked about marrying a man and a pizza was a good one. Howard said he liked the part where the President said he'd let Big Foot blow up Vermont. Howard said he's not sure where that button came from. Will came in and said it's a fake nuke button that you use for deleting files or something. Will kept saying it's a fake nuke button. That's exactly what it is. Will said someone sent it in for them. He said there's a switch and a plate and the whole thing. Howard said Big Foot had no remorse for what he did either. Howard said he didn't know Memet had a fake nuke button. Howard said he's impressed.
Howard said he's thirsty and he's not sure why he's not drinking water. Howard said he has to drink some. He said he's not sure why he's torturing himself.
Howard said he watched the first 20 minutes of the debate last night. He said he watched the loser debate and felt bad for Chris Christie. He said he's sure he's upset about not being on that main stage. Howard said he'd drop out of that out of shame. Howard said Herman Cain was the front runner at one point years ago. Howard said you don't drop out and just roll the dice to see what happens. Robin said that they have an idea that the politicians will rise and the fringe candidates will drop out.
Howard said it seems like people want someone outside of politics. He said he thinks that people like Trump and Carson because they might be able to make something happen. Howard said Trump's whole thing is about kicking out every illegal alien. Howard said that they say that Eisenhower had a plan like that. Fred said they called it ''Operation Wetback'' but he's not sure who named it that. They said that they worked with Mexico because Mexico wanted their workers back.
Howard said Trump is also about putting a wall on the border. Howard had some audio from the debate last night where Trump was talking about some of those things.
Howard said Trump also said that the Miss USA pageant will be better than ever if he's President. Robin said that if we lose our workers they're going to lose crops too.
Howard said the FOX business news questions were supposed to be nice. Howard said it kind of sucked. Howard said he tuned over to Supergirl instead. Howard said he needed to watch that. Howard said he isn't digging the show. Howard said the whole Supergirl thing was something he never got into. He said she'd pop up in Superman comics and that was fine. He said he doesn't really give a shit. Howard said he wants to think about the super hero as a man. Howard said the show is on CBS but it has the look of a CW show. Howard said it doesn't have the look like they put money into it. Howard said the show looks the same as The Flash and Arrow. Howard said it looks very much the same. Howard said the other thing is that Supergirl is such a dummy and a shit head. Howard said she came to this planet with super powers and she's such a dolt and a retard. Howard said maybe he should change that to imbecile. Howard said maybe slow or feeble. He said he knows retard is the wrong word to use.
Howard said he thinks he saw some strings holding her up in a scene. Robin said it was like going back to the original Superman TV show. Howard said he was staring at her tits the whole time. He said she is a beautiful girl. He said he saw the nude pictures of her on Homeland. Howard said she was completely nude and she has a killer body. Howard said Mr. Skin has them on the site.
Howard said the show made no fucking sense last night. He said at the end of the day the story has to make sense. He said even though it's a girl who flies it has to make sense. Howard said Jon Hein sent a note saying that the ratings are down for the third week in a row. Howard said he's not surprised.
Howard said the other thing is that Jimmy Olsen is black in the show. Howard said Supergirl is into him too. Howard said she's like a Kardashian.
Howard said the daughter of Bruce/Caitlyn Jenner was at a fashion show. He said her name is Kendall. He said she was doing a Victoria's Secret show. Howard said these models come out wearing bikinis with big wings and boots. Howard said he's not sure what they're selling. Howard said maybe it's just a way to get their name out there. Howard said the women are hot but the clothes are weird. Howard said Kendall was in some weird outfit. Howard said it wasn't even lingerie. Howard said that chick Gigi Hadid was in it too.
Howard said as a guy he's not going to go and watch that Victoria's Secret fashion show. Howard read an article about some of the girls in the show and he wasn't able to pronounce Candice Swanepoel so Gary tried to help. Gary said he was being told he was wrong too. Howard said if you're a guy and you watch that shit then you're a loser. Howard said he'd pretend he isn't interested. Gary said he knows a guy who used to fight hard to get into those shows. Howard said it was Ross. Gary said he's not saying anything.
Howard said that Heidi used to do those shows. Howard said he talked to her about wearing the wings. Howard said that whole thing is set up by guys. Howard said he's going to start a company to hire girls to be the top parrot. Howard said he'll call them Victoria's Parrots. Howard said he'd let one girl be the top parrot.
Howard said something is up. He said the whole thing doesn't make sense. Howard said he asked Heidi about the wings and he thinks she said she was excited about wearing them. Howard said he doesn't remember her answer about it. He said he knows she said something about it. He said he quickly lost interest.
Fred had a clip of how to pronounce Candice Swanepoel. He played it for Howard. Howard laughed and asked where he got that. Fred said they have it online. Howard said he should show up to an event wearing a big set of wings. Gary said they're telling him that all of the girls wear wings and a big prize is a million dollar diamond necklace that they get to wear until they have to return it for the next girl. Howard said they have to come up with something like that to fool girls into believing in.
Howard read more about some of the women who were in the fashion show and talked about Gigi Hadid almost collapsing when she found out she was going to be on the runway. Howard said she said it was her dream. Howard said they could do something like that. Robin said they'll talk about it but never get it done.
Howard said they're going to have a fashion show and dress the girls as pigeons and they'll all shit on the audience. Howard said they'll air that on CBS.
Robin said she has some meetings today. She said that they're social events. Robin said she's meeting with Alison Norris and Toni Coburn. Robin said she's having lunch with Jackie Martling. Howard asked why. He said she was the one going crazy from him. Robin said she's on a campaign of having closure with people. Howard said Robin is in a new phase where she's taking some kind of classes and calling people and apologizing. Howard said she called him and it was very personal. Howard said he never thought that Jackie would get a call. Gary asked when he's getting a call. Robin said that Gary is on the list. Howard said he figured Jackie would be last on the list.
Howard said he was going to pull Robin to the side to tell her to calm down. Howard said that she's going to be wondering what she did. Robin said Gary deserves a lunch. Gary said Robin is going to go bankrupt doing this. Howard said she's having one with the Jesus Twins next week. Fred said with just one of them (one died). Howard said Robin owes an apology to the Mexican guy who hosed her down after her diarrhea incident.
Howard said they were talking about Angry Alice and how she hates everyone on the show but Fred. Howard said she loves Fred. Howard said they got to thinking about how funny it would be to play Fred's wife and call Alice accusing her of trying to steal Fred. Howard said it worked out great. Howard played the call where they had Fred's fake wife call Alice to tell her to stop coming on to Fred. In the call Sal called Alice and told her that Fred's wife was there to talk to her. Sal puts the woman on the line and fake Alison tells Alice that she hears she really loves him. Alice said it's like a brother. She said it's not like she's thinking. Alice said she's old fashioned. She said she doesn't even like sex. She said she can let it go. Alice eventually yelled at her to get the fuck off the phone because she doesn't do stuff like that. She said that she's a filthy bitch. She said she hates sex and she's not going to do anything with a married man. Alison asked why she would do that to their marriage. Alice told her to go kill herself and hung up.
Howard said playing Fred's wife was Tammy Pescatelli. Fred said she's very good. Howard said he liked that Alice believed that his wife was threatened by her. Fred said it turned real fast.
Howard said that woman called in yesterday about a JD sex tape. Howard played a clip of a fake JD sex tape that they made up.
Howard took a call from a guy who said that he liked Whoopi on the show yesterday. He said she was right about saying it takes work to make a relationship work. He also said that he liked what she said about hygiene. Howard let the caller go a short time later. Howard said they got a lot of nice email about her too. Howard said people seemed to enjoy it. Howard asked if he should take a break. Fred said they might as well do it now. They went to break after that.
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Howard said they went to a parking lot to cover people tailgating. Howard said some people don't even watch the game. He said they just hang out in the parking lot. Howard said that's something he'll never understand. Howard said he spends all weekend trying to be by himself and these people want to be in a parking lot with other people. Robin said it's like parades. Howard said he avoids everything in life where people are congregating. Howard said he does not understand the concept of going somewhere there are other people.
Robin said Times Square boggles her mind. Howard said he thinks he hates sports because of people. Howard said millions of people gather in Times Square to watch a ball drop. He said they must get pleasure from standing next to other people. He said they're standing there going nowhere. Howard said he thinks those people are dumb assholes. Howard said the hosts of those show don't even want to be there. They're getting paid though so that's why they do it. Howard said Dick Clark figured out how to take advantage of those imbeciles. Howard said Trump would win if he just deported those people.
Howard said they went out to this tailgating thing and interviewed some people. Howard played a clip of some of those people talking about why there are no Asian people in football.
Howard played another clip of a guy who was asked about eating ass. the guy said he has and it was disgusting. He said the chick was hotter than he was so he felt he had to do it to please her. Howard said he'd be right out of there if someone told him to do that.
Howard played another clip of a guy commenting on illegal immigration. They had audio of some people using the N-word without thinking about it. Robin asked if there were any black people tailgating. Howard said he's not sure. He said that's a good question. Howard played that clip and then said that he got a note saying there were black tailgaters. Howard played another clip of some guys using racial slurs when they were asked to give as many as they could.
Howard played a few more clips of people talking about how they don't care about people who are offended by the name ''Redskins.'' Howard said this is why he doesn't go tailgating.
Robin said after doing that it's all she wanted to do. She said she wanted to sing like that on her way home. Howard played another clip of Robin singing without the music background. Robin said it may not sound good but it did feel good. Howard played JD singing too. Howard said all of this will be on iTunes shortly. Howard played another clip of Robin singing without the music. Howard said that's good stuff.
Howard took a call from a guy who said he loves Howard's personality and he'd do anything to suck his ween. Howard played their song parody ''I'll Suck Your Ween'' and then the Opera version of the song for the guy. The caller said he's going to have that song stuck in his head for a while now. Howard played the A Cappella version for the guy too. Howard said on the radio he has a good personality but in real life people don't like his personality that much. Howard said he'll hang out with people and they become disillusioned quickly. Howard said he walks around the rest of the day exhausted. Howard said he talks all morning so he's just a grumpy dick head all day. Howard said he's in the back of his car with Ronnie yelling all day. Howard he'll try to make conversation with Ronnie and ask what he's having for dinner and Ronnie will just yell ''I don't know.'' He said they do talk about Homeland but Ronnie doesn't have much to say about it.
Howard said he told Ronnie to watch Gotham. He said Ronnie said he started watching but he stopped because he didn't like it. Ronnie came in and asked what's the matter. Howard said he was talking about their conversations. Ronnie said he got out of it because he had too many shows to watch. He said he watched the first season. Ronnie said there are just so many shows he's hooked into.
Ronnie asked if he's watching Quantico. Howard said he's not. Ronnie said they have some hot chicks on the show. He said he thinks Howard would like it. Howard said Ronnie is into Blacklist but he's not into that. He said he thinks that show sucks now. Howard said he liked it at first. Howard said he turned Ronnie on to that show Banshee. Howard said he thinks Ronnie would like Narcos too.
Ronnie said he watches Scandal with Stephanie. Howard said he has to wait to watch The Walking Dead because Stephanie doesn't want to watch it at the same time. Howard said Ronnie should be watching Matlock reruns at his age. He said he's glad he's watching some new stuff.
Howard said Ronnie was still watching VHS tapes until last year. Howard said he just read that Betamax just shut down finally. Gary said that radio stations were using it. Gary said they used to use it there too. Howard said he doesn't care. He said he's bored.
Howard said there's already a song about JD not washing his sheets. JD said he heard it already. Howard played it and it was to that Justin Bieber song that they did ''I'll Suck Your Ween'' to. JD said they're a bunch of assholes around there. Howard said he's impressed with the turn around time on that song.
Howard said he thinks the Shia LaBeouf thing is kind of cool. Robin said she's not sure how it's art. Howard said it's performance art. He said that's funny watching your own movies. Steve Brandano is a fan of Shia's too. Howard had him come in. Steve was started to talk about that but Howard talked about how disheveled he was yesterday in the meeting. Steve said he can't talk about why he looked that way. Howard said he told them that he didn't sleep at home. Steve talked about how much he likes Shia for a few seconds but he kicked him out a short time later. JD said you can watch Shia watching his own movies online. He said it's frozen right now though. Howard asked how you do that. JD said it's NewHive.com/AllMyMovies
Robin read a story about some diamond auctions that are going on. Robin said there was a record for one diamond that sold for $28.5 million. Robin read the details of that sale and another one that is going up for sale today that could sell for as much as $55 million.
Howard took a call from Sour Shoes who was doing his Tan Mom impression. Howard said it's an amazing impression or a tape of her. Sour was doing the impression. Howard said that's really good. Sour was doing a Medicated Pete impression too. Howard asked how long it took to develop that. He said it took about ''noine'' months or so. He said ''noine'' in his Gary voice.
Gary came in and said that something was going on with him yesterday. He said he called the office maybe 300 times yesterday. He said Sour just makes up old Mets names to get in touch with him. Gary was talking about that and Sour was making all kinds of noise. Howard asked what was going on. Sour said it was raining. Sour did his Jackie impression and said he's going to pay for lunch with jokes. He did his Artie voice and asked if he can come to lunch too.
Howard asked Tan Mom some questions. Sour did that voice and said she's going to be tanning and Sal is going to piss all over her. Howard thanked Sour for the call. He said that impression was so good. He said they have him down there sometimes but it's exhausting to have him there. Howard said he literally has to be baby sat. Howard said he brings toys to play with in the green room. He said he's like a man baby. Howard said he has coloring books and toys there. Howard said he packs his own stuff though. He said he sets up the whole green room and it's not shtick. Howard said he walked in on him once and he was playing. He said he wanted to tell him he was doing a good job. Howard said he does that baby voice and that's like his alter-ego. Robin said he brings his own food too. Howard said he can't handle that baby voice. Howard said even his regular voice is disturbing.
Howard said Scott the Engineer says that Sour calls him every day at 9:19. Howard said he's not sure what that's about. Gary said it's because it's ''Noine noineteen.''
Robin got back to her news and read about this guy Frasier Glen Cross who shot a couple of people in a Jewish community center has been sentenced to life in prison. Howard played some audio of the guy making some comments about rising from his grave. Robin said she's not sure what's going on with the anger out there. Howard said he just stays home and he's angry there.
Robin read a story about today being Veteran's Day and how some people are treating our vets. Howard said that Robin is a vet. Robin said Howard is too. She laughed after saying that. Robin read about how vets feel about how they're treated based on a survey taken. Howard said he doesn't like talking about his service. Howard said Richard's Dad served in Vietnam and he never talks about it. Howard said Memet and Brent are also vets. Howard said there are some vets around there. even on their cowardly show.
Richard came in and said that his dad has a purple heart but there are certain things he doesn't want to talk about. He said his dad did save a guy who had been shot. Howard asked if he ever asked about the purple heart. Richard said Howard tried asking him about it at K-Rock when they were in the studio. Howard said he tried to loosen him up when he told some Nam stories of his own. Richard said today might be a good day to get into that stuff with his dad. He said he would like to do what Howard did with his parents. Howard said Gary's dad had two purple hearts too. Gary said he had a bronze star too. He was in Okinawa. Gary said he was a medic. Howard said then he came back to this country and had to live with Gary. Gary said he took a piece of shrapnel in his back. Howard said that's why they think Gary had green teeth. Howard said Gary's dad was a war hero and so was Richard's. Robin said these guys don't brag about it. Gary said his father hated talking about it. He said he thinks he felt he was just doing his job and he hated people who paraded their awards in front of other people. Richard said his dad never brought that stuff up either. Howard said he should stop talking about it too. He said he should keep his stories to himself. He said he had like 14 purple hearts. He said that's why he hired Gary because he has purple lips.
Howard said one time one of his buddies got a purple heart. Howard said the guy dragged out a bunch of them who were hurt. Howard said he was kidding around with him and when they were out on patrol he pulled a heart out of a guy and pinned it on himself. He said the guys loved that. He said sometimes they had fun out there.
Richard said he wants to interview his dad about what happened and put it on tape. Howard said he can play it for them after he does. Richard said he thinks he'd be okay with that.
Howard told another story about burning down a village and using his farts to start the fire. He said those were the days. Howard said in another village there were some kids there and they were upset after their parents were killed. Howard said he ripped out the testicles of some guys who were killed and juggled for the kids. Howard said he had about 5 testicles going. He said he squashed about 2. Richard said Howard should read the book ''Unbroken.'' Gary agreed that the book is really good. Howard said it's really good. Howard told Richard he should do something heroic and get out of there.
Robin read a story about President Obama being on the cover of Out magazine. Robin had some details about that. Howard said if you missed it earlier in the show they had Obama in the studio with Big Foot. Howard did a live commercial read after that.
Robin read a story about a man being under arrest for using a slingshot to launch an object over the White House fence. Robin said they weren't able to find what he shot over the fence.
Howard took a call from a woman who freaked out when she got on. It was Debbie the Pet Lady. She asked if Howard remembers her. Howard asked if it was Debbie. Gary said it is. Debbie said she misses him so much. Howard said he misses her too. She said she doesn't live in New York anymore. She said she got a real farm. She was screaming and it was very hard to understand what she was saying. Howard thanked Debbie for the call and hung up on her.
Howard took a call from Richard's dad Tom. Howard said he's calling today because he's a veteran. Howard said he wants to thank him for his service. Tom said he really appreciates that. Howard said it's no joke. Howard said Richard is going to be calling to ask about Vietnam and everything. Howard said he can tell him to screw off if he wants. Tom laughed. Howard asked how he's celebrating today. Tom said they're going out to eat. Robin asked if they're going to Taco Tico. Tom said they went broke. Howard asked if he's going to go to a restaurant or just kill something and eat it. Tom said if they find anything on the road they may do that. Howard asked when they last got road kill. Tom said he had a squirrel recently. Howard asked if it was hard to eat. Tom said it depends on where it was run over. Howard asked if he puts it in a bag or something. Tom said he does. He said they don't smell too bad though. Howard asked if he just picks the thing up and puts it in the car. Tom said ''Yeah.'' He said his wife usually fries it up.
Howard said Mrs. Richard's Dad prepares the food. Howard said Tom kills the stuff and she cooks it up. Tom said she comes deer hunting with him. Howard asked if he ate just one squirrel. Tom said he's had more than one. Howard asked if he would eat a rat. Tom said no. He said when he was in the service he'd go a few days without food. Howard asked what the worst thing was he had to eat over in Nam. Tom said fish heads were pretty bad. He said he never ate them in the United States.
Howard told Tom about how Richard doesn't know how he got his purple heart. Tom said he's still not sure if he'd tell him how he got it. Richard said they used to go to reunions and stuff with his dad.
Howard told Tom about how Richard blew his nose into his shirt and then wore it two days in a row. Tom said he doesn't think he taught him how to do that. Tom said he has blown his nose without using a tissue but doesn't blow it into a shirt. Richard said his dad carried a handkerchief. Howard said they're gross too. Howard said use a tissue so you can throw it away. Howard said a handkerchief is a piece of material covered in boogers.
Howard asked if Tom still has his purple heart. Tom said he does. Howard asked if he'll leave it to Richard in his will. Tom said he will probably get it. Robin asked if his wife knows how he got his purple heart. Tom said she does. Howard said you have to tell your wife all of that stuff. Howard said he won't press him on it. He said he just wants to say he appreciates what he did.
Howard said he and Tom should go over there to Vietnam and tour the old haunts together. Richard said they do that stuff these days. Howard asked if there are any half brothers or sisters of Richard's over there. Tom said he's not sure about that. Howard let Tom go a short time later.
Robin got back to her news and read a story about an 8 year old boy who has been charged in the murder of a 1 year old girl. Robin said that the mother turned herself in yesterday and she's being charged for leaving her child in the care of the boy when she went to a night club.
Robin read about a campaign to get marijuana regulated in Massachusetts. Robin said they are trying to get this on the ballot.
Howard took a call from Mariann from Brooklyn who brought up a poll they have up on HowardStern.com for who is grosser and JD is winning with the dirty sheet thing. Mariann said that the girlfriend must be gross if she's sleeping in those sheets. JD told her to hang up, idiot. Howard said JD is going to get some shit over the dirty sheets. JD said he's getting it on Twitter already. Howard said they're just busting balls. Howard said it should go away in about 5 years. JD said just like the spoons. Howard said they already have an account for JD's sheets on Twitter. He said you have to love this audience. He played a JD song parody about him not cleaning his sheets.
Robin read about Ben Carson calling out Hillary Clinton about Benghazi. Robin had audio of him talking about that. She had some other audio clips from last night's debate.
Howard took a call from Bobo who said he is a veteran too. He served for the Army National Guard. Howard said he was scalped by the Indians when he served. Howard said Joey Boots is a veteran too.
Howard took a call from King of All Blacks who asked about Ronnie almost being 70 if you round him off. He said his dick can't get as hard as it used to. Howard said he asked Ronnie said he says it does. He said he fucks 4 times a week too. King said he has to be lying. Howard said Ronnie isn't 70. He's like 66. Howard said George Takei is 78 and he's still jerking off like 4 times a week. King said that's what he's saying but they don't know if that's true.
Ronnie came in so Howard asked him about the fucking. Howard asked if he has any trouble getting it up. Ronnie said no. He said he fucks 4 times a week too. He said they can get Stephanie on the phone to ask her about it. King said he fucks every morning. Ronnie said that king has a heart condition so that's not happening. King said he doesn't have a heart condition. He said he's perfect.
Ronnie said he has no reason to lie about it. He said he has a 32 year old girlfriend and she's not going to hang around if he can't fuck. King said she's hanging around for sympathy. King asked if he has veins in his dick. Ronnie said of course he sees veins. King said you know he doesn't see them anymore. Ronnie said that he is obsessed with his dick. Howard asked if King sees veins in his dick. King said that when you meet a woman they are very prominent. He said Ronnie can't be seeing them now. He said his dick must look like a garden hose now. Ronnie said it flops over just like a garden hose. Howard said he believes Ronnie.
Howard said he's telling him that Ronnie is not lying. King said he still thinks he's a liar. Howard said he'll get Stephanie on the phone and talk to her about it. Ronnie said she's in surgery right now so he can't get her on the phone. He said she's working. King said he knows what she's going to say. He said she'll say it's just fine. King said Howard knows damn well that he doesn't get hard. Howard said he has to go. He thanked Ronnie for doing that.
Howard said the songs are coming in fast and furious about JD's sheets. Howard had a new song from Daniel Mendelson. Howard said there are so many of them. Howard said it's not going away any time soon.
Robin had more clips of people commenting on the debate last night. Robin had Howard play those and they spent a couple of minutes discussing them.
Robin read a story about America's Got Talent being at Queens College this Saturday. Robin said they're doing open auditions there. Robin said Nick Cannon will be back as the host. Robin said Simon Cowell will be judging this season. Howard said one of the NBC guys emailed him to say hi. He said they were nice people. Robin said they think Simon is going to bring the show to a new level this season.
Robin said they say the ratings on The Walking Dead are dropping. Howard said it still gets huge ratings. Howard said he thinks this season has been the best. He said the quality of the show hasn't dropped one bit. He said if you stop watching he thinks you're a douche.
Robin said McDonald's has fried cheese sticks now. Howard said people aren't fat enough so lets fry some cheese. Robin said it will be on the dollar menu everywhere next year. Robin said they come in packs of 3.
Robin said Dunkin' Donuts has their holiday cup coming out and they're going with something different than Starbucks. Robin said they're going with a ''Joy'' cup this season. Howard said that should make Sal happy. He said he's happy as long as Sal is happy.
Robin read about different stores that are going to wait until after Thanksgiving to put up Christmas decorations.
Howard took a call from a guy who said they're looking to adopt a cat and they emailed Beth. He said that was a few weeks ago and they haven't heard back. Howard said they get a lot of email about it. The caller asked if they can get Beth on the phone. Howard said he can't do that right now but try following her on Instagram or something.
Robin read about how much a 24 year old won at a professional poker game. Robin said he won over $24 million. Howard said it's insane how good the pros are at Poker. Howard said he played in a casino once and it's like the other players know what's in your hand.
Robin read a story about Pentatonix performing with an orchestra at the American Music awards. Robin said they're going to be performing the Star Wars theme. Howard asked how annoying they are. Howard said the only A Cappella he gets into is the version of ''I'll Suck Your Ween.'' He played some of that for Robin.
Robin wrapped up and Howard ended the show around 11:15am.
Jon said they were all over the place today. Jon said that they should start off with the poll today. Rahsaan said they're asking ''What Was the Most Disgusting Part of Today's Show?'' and the choices were:
Jon asked Brian about JD and not washing his sheets in a year. Jon said he said it and he probably regretted it immediately. He said JD is going to hear about it now until Howard goes off the air. Brian said when he was single and a bachelor he wouldn't admit to the gross stuff he did. Brian said he can't imagine going a week and a half. He said there's no way it's not disgusting. He said he might just throw them out and buy new ones. He said it's just disgusting.
Jon asked Lisa about what she thinks about that. Lisa said that it's so concerning to her. She said the fact that he has had sex in that bed at least once would make you say wash those sheets. Lisa said she washes her's every time she has sex in her's. She wonders if this is real. She said he might want to throw the whole bed away.
Gary said it's so easy to get your stuff washed. He said you can have it picked up at your house and it's not that expensive. Jon said that he washes his clothes every week. Gary said he's suspect on that. Lisa said she is too. Jon said that clothes are easy. He said washing sheets takes effort and JD is lazy. He said there's a big difference there. He said the second JD hears it he's going to say who cares?
Gary said that JD thinks that washing something is when it's either stained or smells. He said it's too late if it smells or it's stained. Brian said when a guy is single they don't care. He said that if a woman comes to visit then you want to trick her into having sex and you'll do whatever you have to do. Jon said that hasn't stopped JD. He said he thinks he will change his sheets but how long will it be until next time.
Jon said Richard has changed a lot but he still sneezes into his neck and wipes it in his shirt. Gary said he thinks Richard suffers from PTSD from living in a storage unit. He said that if you have sex with a paper towel thing in your storage unit then some of that stuff doesn't seem so weird to you. They went to break a short time later.
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Jon moved on to talk about Michael Rapaport who was on the Wrap Up Show yesterday talking about how he'd like Gary to move the date of his party at his house. Gary said that he probably would have canceled it if Michael hadn't busted his balls over it so much. He said then he was going to tell him he wasn't coming but now he's coming and he can't cancel it and they're doing it on the day he wanted to do it. He said that this is the day he wants to do it and they're back on track now.
Lisa said she read some of the email that was coming through yesterday and she asked if that was all because of Michael. Gary said it was. Lisa said no other leagues are going to let him play with them. She said he should be thrilled that he's in this league. She said she loves him because he is a misfit and so is she.
Jon asked if Lisa is worried about finishing last in their league. Lisa said she's in 10 leagues and this is the only one she's finishing last in. She said that she knows the penalty is that she has to go in Times Square wearing a sign. She said it's a win-win for everyone. She said her fans will love it.
Gary said he knew she'd be a good sport about coming in last. He said the person who can't bare to be last is JD. Lisa said it doesn't bother her like that. She said women are able to handle it and let it go but men can't.
Jon took a call from a guy who said he was having a shitty day today but then Big Foot came on. He said he thought one part was so funny he had to write it down. He said Howard told Big foot that it was Obama in there and Big Foot actually said ''It is'' in the right way. The guy asked Gary if he has anymore Ninja Coffee Bars. Gary said he doesn't. Gary said rule number 1 is not to ask for it. The caller said he didn't want to be that guy but he's such a fan. Jon told him to keep calling in and maybe they'll have something to give away.
Jon said they also revealed that Robin is having a lunch with Jackie Martling today. Jon said that Gary was wondering where his apology lunch is with her. Jon asked how long this will last before Robin moves on to something else. Gary said he went to Robin during the break and said they're all good so she doesn't have to have a lunch with him. He said he is surprised about the Jackie thing. Brian said he heard something from a couple of years ago when Robin said she would never speak to Jackie again. Brian said Robin didn't speak to him when he came back on the show a couple of times. Gary said he thinks that Ronnie could use a lunch. She has beat up on Ronnie pretty good. Jon said he'll never get that lunch. Brian asked where this came from. The guys didn't know because Robin didn't talk about that.
Jon said Robin was singing the top 5 songs too. He said that she's just enjoying it even if she can't sing that well. Gary said Robin used to take classes to learn to sing and it was Bon Jovi's vocal coach. Gary said she was spending a lot of money doing that too. He said he thinks she's enjoying the joke now. He said Robin knows what she's doing now.
Brian said Robin said on the air years ago that she was upset with Stuttering John when he had tape of her singing that wasn't so good. He said she said it was something that really upset her. Gary said back in Washington DC Fred got the idea to record her singing in her booth without her knowing it and she was humiliated by that.
Jon took a call from a guy who asked if the ''I'll Suck Your Ween'' thing will stop them from getting someone like Justin Bieber on the show. Gary said they're just parodying the song and he doesn't think it hinders them. He said the song parody may go on even longer than the actual song. They went to break a short time later.
Gary asked if the original Batman TV series set them back because they didn't take them seriously. Brian said in the 70s they had things that they'd change from the comics and they were trying to fix something that wasn't broken. He said the fans wanted to see the real thing. He said all of the movies and TV shows are trying to stick to the real stories.
Jon said Howard would love to play a bad guy in a movie or TV show. He asked Brian what character he'd be best as. Brian said maybe The Riddler or something cool like that. Gary said Howard wants to take over the world. He said he wants to be the best radio guy in the world so he wants that. Brian said that Howard called him and Joe Quesada to his house for just that thing. He said that Howard was looking for it. He said they were talking about doing a Ghostbusters type of thing. He said it would be very Howard and lots of fun. He said it would have been cool. Jon asked who was most excited about it in the meeting. Brian said they all had a great time with Howard and it was like the best day talking comics with Howard for 8 hours. He said it was great.
Jon said that there's a summit going on right now and Brian should be there. Brian said he is supposed to be there. He said that if you do leave the room then they might kill off your favorite character. Gary said when you are asked to leave the room you should know better.
Jon asked Brian about when he hears Howard talking about something like Daredevil does he get more of a spring in his step. Brian said he does. He said that he had an experience years go when Howard went on the air and talked about Ultimate Spider-Man and he was working on the book at the same time. He said that he thought he was having psychotic break at the time.
Jon took a call from a guy who said he wanted to call and thank them. He said he remembers Howard on the channel 9 show. He thanked Gary for the great memories. He also said he threw out a pitch at a game and he pulled a Baba Booey and didn't even make it to the plate. Gary said welcome to the club that no one wants to be in.
Jon said they got to hear from Richard's dad today. Jon said that he didn't want to talk about how he got his purple heart. Jon said he knows Gary's dad went through that too. Gary said Richard wants to do that thing where he interviews his parents like Howard did. Gary said he did that with his dad and his dad didn't want to talk about his time in World War II. He said at one point his dad cried when he did finally do it. Gary said he has a cousin who was in Vietnam and he says that you just don't talk about that stuff.
Jon took a call from a guy who said he's been listening since high school. He said he's a vet and it makes them feel good when Howard talks about them. He asked if they ever heard about the flag they hung in honor of Howard being on Sirius for a year. Gary said he thinks they have that sitting in their studio. The caller said he'd love to see a picture of that. The caller said they've been the best. Gary told him to hold on and he'll see what he can do.
Jon asked Rahsaan how the poll ended up. Rahsaan said that JD is far in the lead with 75 percent of the votes. They spent a little time talking about that poll before Jon got in some plugs and ended the show. They were done around Noon.
Jon said he wanted to talk about Bobo's awards and he knows they're talking a lot about Bobo this week. Jon said there are times when someone will go to an award that goes back in time. He said it might hold a special place in their heart but it may not mean anything to anyone else. Gary said Bobo handles that the way he sees himself as a fan. He said it's quantity over quality. He said that he may have some merit with some of those awards. He said some of the things he mentioned were like certificate of appreciation and things like that.
Jon asked if Jake was impressed by that. Jake said it's about as impressive as being in Craig's Radio Hall of Fame. He said what they need is every celebrity who is annoyed by Bobo to call in and complain. He said that the more of that they get the more of Bobo rattling off his awards we'll get.
Gary asked Jake why he would care about Bobo's awards. Jake said he doesn't care at all. He said it would be like hearing Joey Boots own a marathon. Jake said Bobo is an essential flavor of the show. He said there are lunatics on the show and Bobo is one. He said if you don't have a guy like that calling in then you don't have a radio show. Gary said the movie ''Big Fan'' wrote that movie like it was Bobo. He said it's rants and questions for a radio show.
Jon said Bobo is an extreme fan but he's getting a lot of flack. He said he just loves the show. He said Howard picks up the calls and enjoys having him on. He said he thinks the Bobo bashing bandwagon is on and everyone is jumping on. Gary said it has become very Jr. High School and like Lord of the Flies.
Jon took a call from a woman who said she was listening to the girl who called in about Bobo not being a good driving instructor. She said that there are awards that you can apply for. She said that no one came to Bobo to give him awards. She said people who apply for awards don't really put their time into their job. She said that she never won any awards because she didn't apply for them. Gary said that's a great thing to ask Bobo about. Jon said he'd like to know what he applied for and didn't get.
Jon said he had that happen with his kids. He said they might apply for some award but they had to pay for some meeting to go to. He said he wonders if that reeks of that. Gary said when he first started working on the show they used to get things in the mail about how you were eligible to be ''Who's Who'' in America. He said that you had to pay to be in that book.
Jon took a call from a guy who said he didn't think Bobo was in the Wack Pack until he heard the call he had with that girl today. He said he gets wackier and wackier by the second. Gary said he thinks that Brian Phelan took one of Bobo's classes and he concentrated on one girl in the class and he gets very offended if you make fun of his teaching. Jon said that Bobo claimed that people would applaud after his classes. Gary said you can get in trouble making claims like that. Jon said he would love to be in a class like that where he gets to applaud the teacher. He said Bobo claims that's what was going on.
Jake said he wonders if Bobo would like to be teaching those comedy driving instructor schools and he's just not good enough to do that. Gary asked if Jake has ever won an award. Jake said he won a radio award but he never talks about it because who cares? He said he also lost an Emmy recently. He said Billy on the Street was nominated and they lost that to Between Two Ferns. They went to break a short time later.
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Jake said Ronnie has a full life. He said he drives a limo and hangs out in the hallway and that lets him be sexually disgusting in his off hours. He said he's impressed that he's with a woman who is young enough to still requires birth control. Gary said Stephanie really loves him too. Jake said he's going on the air and banging the Nuvaring out of her. He said that's a game of ring toss that no one needs to play.
Gary said there is a side of Ronnie that is sincere and lovable. He said you don't see that when he's talking about that ring. He said you only see one side of him. Jake said they don't get to see that side. He said he is one of the sweetest guys and that might be why he gets away with what he does on the show.
Gary said Ronnie was thanking all of the Veteran's for their service on Twitter. Then he's tweeting about the hot chick of the week a minute later.
Jon said he went out to dinner with Ronnie and Stephanie. He said someone commented about his tweeting and his wife was going to follow him. He said he warned her not to. Jon said she started to follow him and she realized that the sex tips are real. He said Ronnie said ''You bet they are...'' He said Ronnie is a really sweet and caring guy but he's having a good time. He said Stephanie gets a kick out of it all too.
Jon took a call from a guy who said he has some points about Bobo. He said he feels like he suffers a little bit from not having self worth. He said that the accomplishments he gives are how he is showing that he is someone. He also feels like Bobo doesn't have a high IQ but he makes for great radio. He said if it makes us feel something then he's doing what he's meant to do. He said it's either hate, love or remember it. Gary said he had a teacher who said art doesn't have to be good. He said if you walk by it and think it's the worst piece of shit ever then its done its job. He said that's kind of what Bobo is like.
Jon said that Bobo's professionalism was being questioned and he felt he had to defend that. He said he gave all of the reasons that he felt he was something. He said for him it kind of justifies who he is.
Gary said he finds it to be a lot like Trump. He said Trump will tell you how great he is and Bobo is kind of like that. Gary said Trump talks about how you have to brand yourself before someone can brand you. Jon said he loves that he's comparing Trump to Bobo. He said that he thinks that it could have something to do with that. Jon said he doesn't think he's far off.
Jake said he'll vote for any candidate that will promise them another Bobo Free Summer. Gary said listeners were split on that idea. He asked if he'd be happy with them not playing the songs. Jake said he likes the songs. He said he would like to see a Bobo Embedded with Bobo while he's banned. Jon said that would be a lot of Bobo.
Jon took a call from a guy who said he wanted to talk about JD's dirty sheets. He asked if he's in the Wack Pack now that this has come out. Gary said no way. He said Richard would be in the Wack Pack if that were the case.
Jon said JD isn't a Wack Packer by any stretch. He said the sheets thing is having a big impact. Rahsaan said that Boll and Branch sponsor the show and you'd think he'd find a way to get some. Jon said it's not even about that. Gary said that washing your sheets is a pain in the ass. He said it's a lot of work for not a big payoff. He said you know you have to do it though. Gary said you also have to buy toilet paper but you do it. Jon said he likes the layered sheets where you put on like 7 layers and just pull one off to have it fresh underneath.
Jake said JD should have figured this out earlier. He said he just needs to wash them. He said they're teaching him how to do this stuff now. Gary said he would get a call from his mother asking if he had washed his sheets. He said JD doesn't have that. He said he thinks JD learns a lot of this stuff from them. Jon said that's what Howard pointed out yesterday. Gary said he has been in that situation before where you tell someone something without thinking it's a big deal. He said then you're surprised at how big a deal it is. They went to break a short time later.
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Jon said one thing Christie talked about was smiling to make people feel better about you. Gary said that's fine if you have a good smile. Jake said he has a theory that Billy Joel told a lot of people that ''Uptown Girl'' was about them. He said that they may never find out who the song was really about. He said that Carly Simon told Howard who ''You're So Vain'' was about and Howard forgot. Gary said he thinks it may have been about someone who wasn't so famous so it was easy to forget. Gary said that's just a theory. Jon said he heard that Uptown Girl was written about Elle McPherson at first but then he changed it. Gary said a song is a great tool to use to get laid.
Jon said that Dave Coulier took credit for ''You Oughta Know'' being about him for years. He said that Alanis isn't saying it was him.
Jon said that Taylor Swift may have written a song about Bob Lefsetz. That's what Bob said on the show when he was on. Jake said he finds that pretty funny that she's write a song about a guy with a radio column.
Jon took a call from a guy who asked why no one on the staff has called out Howard for not going to George's play and staying for it. He said it's a douche bag move. Gary said it would have been much bigger if he didn't announce to George's face that it's exactly what he was going to do. Gary said he left in the middle of the second act himself. He said he had to get up the next morning. Gary said just because you go home doesn't mean you're disrespecting the guy. Gary said if he gets home at 11 he won't get bed until Midnight. He said Howard was laying in bed trying to decompress so he could get to sleep so he could go to work the next day. The caller said he thought it was a bad move. Gary said if he snuck out of the show it may have been even worse. Gary said he saw Howard come in and then Robin walked in and Howard was gone already.
Jon asked if Jake thinks Howard should have been called out for it. Jake said he finds it amusing that Howard hates Broadway plays so much. He said that everyone loves that play Hamilton and Howard is so happy he didn't have to go see it. Jake said this has been Howard for years and you just don't invite him to a musical. He said his joy in hating them is one of his favorite things on the show. Gary said George is a friend of the show. Jake said Howard hates musicals so George shouldn't have expected Howard to show up. Jon said it doesn't matter what kind of Broadway play it is, Howard hates it. He said it doesn't have to be a musical.
Jon said that Sal and Richard cried over Coheed and Cambria. Jon said that he and Gary couldn't be more polar opposites compared to those two. Gary said Richard admits he's a crier. He said he cries over a lot of things. He said Sal is a crier in a different way. He said he will cry over losing his job and the 143 thing. Gary said the thing is that Coheed and Cambria is Richard's band, not Sal's. He doesn't get why Sal would cry over that song. Jon said he agrees with him on that. Jake said he thinks Sal cries over it because of his love for Richard. He said it's about his deep friendship with Richard. He doesn't think it's about the song.
Jon wrapped up and got in some plugs for Sternthology and some other things before ending the show. They were done around Noon.
Jon said the thing that was setting people off this week was JD not washing his sheets for a year. He asked Jeremy if he can understand that. Jeremy said he feels like it's someone who doesn't know that they smell weird. He said that they can't smell themselves. He said maybe JD doesn't know that the sheets smelled. Jeremy said he would go for a while not washing sheets but when a girl was going to come over he'd make sure they were clean.
Gary said he got an email from Christa Miller who said she is in shock that they have someone who hasn't washed his sheets in a year. She said it must smell like feet and old urine. Jon said JD is taking a ton of crap for this. He said he must have washed them by now. Gary said imagine if he hasn't. Jeremy said maybe he'll discover that it's really not clean if he hot boxes it.
Jon said maybe JD became immune to it. Jon wondered how long JD will let it ride now. Jeremy said if the girlfriend heard this she's going to make it happen. Gary said she only comes to visit from time to time. He said she must figure the sheets were clean. He said that she probably thought they were being cleaned. Gary said maybe she didn't notice what was going on. He doesn't know.
Jeremy said JD did say that she did tell him to change the sheets. Jon said he's right. He said maybe they're at that stage in their relationship where it doesn't really matter. He said maybe that's what they're going through.
Gary said he feels like this is the number one thing that JD regrets admitting to. Jeremy said the song turn around was so quick that it was an inspiring moment for everyone. Gary said JD was in a bad mood yesterday. He said sometimes they don't know how much it affects someone. He said JD got really angry at Jason when he went over to him with the camera yesterday. He said JD isn't having a good week. He said there is nothing worse than when you have someone like Sal dancing around behind you for the cameras. He said that's one good thing about not having the TV show now.
Jon took a call from a guy who said that some people are night shower takers and some are morning. He asked what JD is. He said if he's getting in that bed after taking a shower he has to be coming in smelling like some funk. Jon said he thinks that JD must be an evening shower taker. Gary said he doesn't get the night shower taker. He said you sleep in it and then wake up and go to work. Gary said he likes taking one in the morning. He said you start the day clean. He said he gets what the caller is saying. He said JD has never smelled to him though. Jeremy said if he does take one before hand then maybe his sheets are cleaner. Gary said he thinks it's a draw.
Jeremy said he gets in bed after a full day so he has to wash his sheets frequently. He said maybe if JD takes one at night he's not as dirty. He's trying to figure out a way to justify what he does. Gary said it's so nice to get in bed with clean sheets. Jon said he needs a shower in the morning to get him going. He said they will find out when JD showers.
Jon took a call from a guy who said he remembers his days as a bachelor and he didn't do them near as often as they talk about. He said it might have been every 3 months. He said even that might be more than he did. Gary said he gets it when you're first out on your own. He said once a woman is in the picture things change. He said most guys aren't so good looking that they can just have women parading in the house. He said you have to take away every potential roadblock that aren't you and sheets are one of them. Gary said he imagines JD sitting and listening to this and getting upset that it's Friday and they're still talking about it. They went to break after that.
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Jon took a call from a guy who said he's wondering if JD washes his shower towels. He said he had a roommate who never did. Jon said that's a great question. He said Lisa Ann asked him that after the show and he forgot to ask JD about it. He said he figures if he's not washing his sheets he's not washing towels. Gary said everything he does is in question now. He said that towels get funkier quicker than sheets.
Jon said he got a text from JD saying he showers in the mornings. Jeremy said he loves JD and he thinks one of the reasons he's so lovable and fun to know is that he doesn't care. He said he is who he is. He said if he was on the show and he was made fun of for not being able to express himself he might focus on trying to fix that. He said that JD doesn't care and that's an inspiring thing. Gary said JD's mantra is ''Just leave me alone.''
Jon said here is some respect you have to have for JD but now he has a woman in his life and you have to change things. Gary said he's not going to change overnight. He said that he has been making some changes slowly. He said he ate at an Ethiopian restaurant and he never would have done that before. Gary said he saw that Fred's wife really had a dramatic affect on Fred. He said he was very introverted and antisocial and she helped him become a better person that way.
Jeremy said he has had girlfriends who have loved when he was sweaty and loved his stink. He said he wonders if JD's girlfriend is one of those people. Jon said she is a runner. He said he's not sure if that factors into that.
Jon took a call from a guy who said he knows why JD has all of these things going on. He said JD doesn't believe he's worthy of it. He said his self esteem is that low. He said he thinks JD is worth it and he hopes that the girlfriend helps him change. Gary said he thinks that's what Howard says to him too. Gary said sometimes there is more to it than that but sometimes you just don't change your sheets because you don't change your sheets.
Jon asked Jeremy if he think Howard latches on to something and just can't let it go like Gary's throat clearing. Jeremy said he never really hears it. Gary said that he never does it on the air so they won't hear it. Jon said Gary does it a lot but not to the degree that Howard says it happens. Jon said they have seen Gary dealing with it and if Howard gets a hold of it he's not going to let it go.
Gary said everything is under the microscope there. He said that JD has a unique laugh and Howard picks up on that. He said it's everything there. Jeremy said there was some show that Robin was on and she was talking about how Gary and Howard both clear their throats and it's because of what they eat.
Jeremy said that he wants people to not take things too seriously. He said Bobo has been a concern of his lately. He said he's not really a Wack Packer to him. He said Big Foot, Beetlejuice and Jeff the Drunk lack that self awareness to let themselves be themselves. He said Bobo has too much self awareness. He said that he feels bad for Bobo. Jeremy said he wonders what the communication is off the show. He asked if they call and ask if he's okay. Gary said Shuli checks in with him like that.
Gary said it's always weird when someone comes up to him and says they love it when Howard picks on him. He said he's not sure what to say. He said it's weird to hear someone say it to you. They went to break after that.
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Gary said that any goofiness between the two of them is on the air. He said with Jackie she's been very hard on him about the way he left the show. Gary said she didn't even talk to him one time when he was on the show. He said he's not sure what it is that she wanted to apologize to him about. He said maybe they'll hear next week.
Jeremy asked what she's reading or going through to make her do that. Gary said he's not sure. He said he always felt that there was something that Robin didn't like about him. He said that it changed everything for them when they talked about it.
Jon took a call from a guy who asked about Big Foot nuking Vermont and if they let him in on reality or do they just let him go into the world. Gary said he isn't sure about that. He said he didn't get a chance to say goodbye to him when he was in. He said he's sure that he got home and found that Vermont was still there. Jeremy said it's interesting how they don't question things and they just go on with life after that. He said it's like they just live in the moment. Jon said he didn't hesitate to hit the nuke button. He said he didn't think about it at all. Jon said that Big Foot was happy to obliterate it off the map. He said that's what makes him such a special guy.
Gary asked Jon if he thinks that Big Foot's beard was as big as it's ever been. Jon said he is an intimidating guy and when he walks in he's almost like a Teddy Bear. He said he doesn't think they ever piss him off though. Jeremy said the Obama guy did really well. Gary said that he doesn't think Big Foot has ever shown any aggression but he feels like he could snap his neck at any second. Gary said he scares him. Jeremy said he's not intimidated by him from being a fan of the show. He said he sees him as a big Teddy Bear too. He said he just goes with whatever life throws at him. He said he's not sure if that's what it is just on the air or if he goes home like that. Jon said he does seem to be up for anything.
Jon asked Jeremy about Ronnie and how free he feels to reveal his sexual history. Jeremy said he thinks it's fun to see someone blossom and evolve. He said Ronnie is taking the whole ride and he's like Ronnie 2.0 at this point. Gary said he's like their Regis. Jon said Regis isn't talking about knocking out that ring. Gary said who knows what Regis is talking about.
Jon took a call from a woman who said she has a theory about JD. She said that a lot of kids have issues with cleaning if they don't have someone to show them how to do it. She said maybe his mom never taught him about that stuff. She said it is a learned thing and it's not just something you know. Gary said he agrees. He said nothing against his parents but JD went off on his own early in his life. He said it is something that has to be taught. He said maybe it wasn't taught or he wasn't listening. He said he thinks JD just doesn't have the tools. Jeremy said it could also be that his parents did all of that for him and didn't teach him to get into the habit.
Gary said that his wife had a conversation with their son when he went off to college. Gary said that was all being done at the house but they had to tell him what needs to be done. Jon said he has to find out if JD is washing his towels. He said hopefully they'll find out next week.
Jon got in some plugs for today's Sternthology and wrapped up the show. They were done around 11:55am.