|Friday||Latest Master Tape Theatre|
Howard started off the show talking about Robin switching the part in her hair to the other side. Howard said it was a completely different look for her. Robin said that the beauty salon made the change for her. Howard said he's not sure if it's good or not but he was thinking that it was bullshit to change the side.
Artie said that he's not sure he would have noticed it if Howard hadn't mentioned it. He said you have to notice that stuff or the chicks get pissed. Howard said that she looks like Rihanna with the part on the other side. Howard said that the Howard TV guys had a shot of her but it was from today and not from another day.
Howard wasn't happy to hear that President Obama had gone to Camp David already. He said that even Bush waited a little longer than that to go on vacation.
Robin said that they were saying that Obama has been doing a Friday night date night with his wife. He's also gone to a school to read to children. Howard wondered why Presidents have to go read for children when so much is going on. He said that there are far too many other important things to be concentrating on.
Howard checked out the comparison of the parts in Robin's hair that the Howard TV guys had up. Howard said he thinks that the new part could be the right way to go. Robin said she likes the old way. Robin said she may have to go to the bathroom and change it back. Howard said he likes to see what Robin is up to with these changes.
Howard said that Artie was pointing out that everyone lies on the air about something. Howard said that Artie can get very brutal when he fights and argues. Fred said that Artie will pull out all the stops when he's fighting. Robin said that he tries to fix things but he ends up saying things that he can't take back.
Howard said that Artie was even pointing out that he knew that Howard had a nose job before he announced it. Howard said that Artie thinks that it's a good nose job. Howard said he doesn't think that it's that good because it's something that he can notice. He said that his sister was the only one who recognized that he had done something to it. He said that he had to ask her not to tell their mom and dad about it.
Artie said that the TV people knew that he had it done and he had to tell Robin about it since he ended up losing his voice a little bit. He said that he had to go to Dr. Sarno about that.
Howard said that after he did his movie he figured he had to do the nose job. He said that Ivan Reitman asked him not to do it right away because they had to do some additional shots. Howard said he hardly noticed the difference after he had it done though so it may not have mattered.
Artie said that he was just trying to say that it wasn't that serious that he was lying about stuff on the show. Artie said that 99 percent of the stuff he lies about is drug related. That's why he lies about it.
Howard said he tried to explain to Gary about why it was okay to lie about some stuff when you're trying to protect people in your life.
Artie said he called Gary off the air and things seem to be okay with them right now. He said that he's not having a good time in his life right now because he's depressed about something going on in his life. He said he has a hard time getting out of bed because of it. Howard asked Artie if he's been diagnosed as being bi-polar or something. Artie said that word has been thrown around.
Artie talked about some of the prescription drugs that he's tried and how they really don't work on him. He said that he gets depressed a lot in his life and he's not sure he'd feel any better even if everything was perfect in his life.
Artie said that he had to call Will about what he said about him on the Wrap Up Show too. Artie was bummed about bitching about the Wrap Up Show too.
Gary said that he wasn't looking to pick a fight with Artie the other day. Howard said that he did say that Artie was a liar though so that's what started that.
Howard said he knows that Gary gets upset when Artie misses some work, but he doesn't. He said that when things get unacceptable to him, everyone will know it. He's not upset with Artie right now. Gary said that he gets that and they came to an agreement on that. Artie said that when he stays home he doesn't have people over partying, those days aren't fun for him.
Howard read some mail about Jason's looks lately. Jason might weigh more than Artie right now. Someone said that Jason looks like a giant Beetlejuice with the tiny head on the huge body. Howard said that Jason just turned 30 yesterday.
Howard said that one listener wrote in about the Britney Stevens special with Richard Christy that will be on Howard TV soon.
Howard said that he had some feedback about Artie's cupcake proceeds going to St. Judes. They spent a minute talking about that.
Howard read some mail about Bobo and his lack of knowledge about where a pickle comes from. Howard had another one about Robin dating Jim Florentine. They had a shot of Jim in Rolling Stone and the writer thought that he looked like a woman. Gary mentioned that they just booked Jim for an early March appearance. Howard asked if that's okay with Robin. She said that's fine.
Howard said he was reading about this interview that Katie Couric did with this pilot ''Sully'' who landed the plane in the Hudson. Howard said that she asked the guy if he prayed before he was landing the plane and Sully said that he didn't have time to pray. Howard said that you don't sit and pray, you have to rise and use your brains. He said that he's glad that she asked him that question to show people that you don't waste your time praying in a situation like that.
Howard said that President Bush used to tell people to pray in situations like that and it's just not good advice. Howard said that Bush even said that he asked Jesus if they should go into Iraq and that's what Jesus told him to do.
Howard said that he missed Paul McCartney last night. Robin said that Dave Grohl was playing drums in that performance and she's never seen Ringo work that hard playing drums. Howard said that he had some audio clips to play from that show.
Howard said that he thought that Taylor Swift and Miley Cyrus were really good last night. He talked about how Al Greene and Justin Timberlake wasn't a good pairing. Howard said that the Jonas Brothers and Stevie Wonder was depressing too. He said that he liked a couple of performances and thought that Miley and Taylor were really good. Howard said that Taylor Swift looks good too. He played some of that performance. He also said that Carrie Underwood looked good.
Howard played some of U2's performance and said that they didn't make much sense. Howard said that the guy from Coldplay was wearing a belly shirt. He said that was kind of strange. Gary said that he was another story on 60 Minutes last night. Howard said that everyone was worried about performing up there in front of Paul McCartney.
Gary said that the Justin Timberlake and Al Greene thing also had Boyz 2 Men up on stage but it was like they forgot to go to them with the cameras.
Howard said that Robert Plant was looking really odd last night too. He said that he looked like he was from Middle Earth or maybe he could have been in ''The Wrestler'' with Mickey Rourke. Howard said he didn't get to see the performance that he did last night. He played some of the audio and said that it was a weird pairing.
Howard said that Whitney Houston was cleaned up but she sounded like she was on crack. Howard said she was all shaky and stuff last night. Howard said Gary said that she's like Amy Winehouse but better looking. Gary said that Whitney hardly goes out anywhere. Howard played some audio of Whitney reading her lines up on stage and sounding kind of odd as she was introducing Clive Davis. Gary said that she did look odd too. Artie said that's the way a crack whore talks but he's not sure that she was actually on the stuff.
Howard said that one time he thought that Danny Devito had died after Sam Simon told him that he had. Gary said that he thought the guy was dead for 2 days after that because of what Howard told him. Howard said that Sam had come over to have a meeting with him and Sam had told him that he heard that Danny had died in one of the plane crashes on 9/11. Howard said that Sam told him that he knows people who gave him that information. Howard said that he called everyone that he was gone.
Gary said that he kept waiting for the news and on day 5 he asked Howard what was up with that story. Howard said he called Sam and asked him what was up with that. Sam told him that it wasn't true and he found out about 2 hours after he had told Howard. Howard told him that he should have called him and told him that he found out it wasn't true.
Howard said he was reading about this Rihanna chick going out with Chris Brown and now they're saying that he may have beaten her up. Robin said that he wasn't with her last night and she read that he may have had to go in and turn himself in last night.
Howard read the article about Rihanna and Chris. Gary told a story about seeing her out one night when he and Jon Hein were out in California. He said that they heard that she had been fighting with her boyfriend at the time but they didn't know who he was.
Howard read that Rihanna was at the hospital last night. He said that she and her boyfriend are both only 19 years old. Howard said that the cops aren't saying anything about who the woman was. He read that Chris Brown and the woman were arguing in a car. The argument escalated into an altercation but Brown ran off before the cops got there.
Howard read that Rihanna is kind of clingy and may not be able to bare not having her boyfriend around her. Howard said that Brown's planned performance was replaced by Justin Timberlake and Al Greene.
Gary told Howard to play the guy from Coldplay and Jay-Z doing their performance. He thought it was annoying. Howard said he kind of liked that. He played the clip where Chris Martin was performing a song by himself on piano and then Jay-Z comes up and starts singing with him. Howard was laughing and said he really doesn't know what that was all about. Robin and Gary said that it was awful. The audience clapped after he got off the stage so Robin said that they were applauding that he had stopped.
Howard said that he doesn't think it's fair that rap guys can just talk. Artie said that you don't know that a rapper is talented until you hear someone do it really poorly.
Howard said that Katy Perry looked good last night. He said that she lost some weight since she was in there. Howard played some of that performance. Howard said that she was dressed kind of weird. He said that he kind of digs that though. Howard said that was probably the last time she's going to perform that song.
Howard played some of Paul McCartney's performance with Dave Grohl on drums. Gary said he was great on drums. Howard asked what was so great about it. Gary said he was just playing away. Robin said that Paul was playing the same bass that he had given to Howard... but not the same one. Howard said that he should have had one of the real ones and not the fake one.
Howard said that A-Rod can't be trusted because he still thinks that Madonna is a get. He said they were talking about that in the paper this weekend too. Howard said that they're wondering if A-Rod could have been as great as he was if he wasn't on steroids. Howard said they may never know, but the answer might be ''probably not.''
Howard talked about some of the great guys in the past and how they did great without the steroids and probably while they were drinking and stuff.
Howard said that you don't know who you're up against when you go out to play. He said that it's not clear if the pitchers would be as good as they are without steroids.
Howard said that Kelloggs took away the sponsorship with Michael Phelps. Howard said that Bill Maher was talking about how he was amazed that he could swim as good as he could after smoking weed. Howard said that eating Frosted Flakes is probably just as bad for you as smoking pot.
Howard said that he had one of the bottles of wine that Robin got for his birthday. He said that it was very good. Robin said that she's happy that he's enjoying that. Howard thanked both Gary and Robin for the wines they got him for his birthday.
Howard and the guys talked about how the information about A-Rod was released. The files were supposed to have been destroyed from what he read. He said that they ended up getting out anyway. The guys wondered who let that information out and why it was let out now. They were wondering if it was his ex-wife who leaked the information or someone else.
Howard had some audio of this ''Octomom'' being interviewed. He said that her name is Nadya Suleman. Howard played some of the audio of her being interviewed and talking about why she's having these kids. Nadya was asked about how she had gone through with the pregnancy and had multiple embryos implanted at the same time.
Howard said that this isn't being responsible and said that even her parents are thinking of getting out of the house with her and her 14 kids. Howard played audio of her talking about how she just wanted to be a mom so that's why she did this. Howard said that she should be locked up and they should give her kids to Angelina Jolie.
Howard said she should also be on the front page of the Onion Newspaper with some wacky headline. Howard said he had to go to break after that but he mentioned that they have this Brian McNamee coming in today. He said that all of the press out there are asking for transcripts of what the guy says today. Howard said that they want to know something but he's not even sure what kind of questions they expect him to ask this guy. Howard said that Norm MacDonald is also coming in today.
Artie said he's going to be playing poker with Sam Simon and Norm out in Vegas next week. Howard said that's a great idea. He said that they should keep cameras on Artie while he's out there and forget about the poker tournament he's going to be in. Howard told Artie he might get bored out there since Gary said that there's not that much to do in Vegas.
Howard goofed on Gary for a few minutes about that. He tried to get Gary to tell Artie that going to Vegas would be boring. Gary said that Artie will probably end up sleeping for 18 hours instead of doing other things out there. They went to break a short time later.
Howard took some phone calls before bringing in Brian McNamee. Howard said that Brian isn't speaking to any media other than him. He said that's apparently a big deal. Howard said that he should be on steroids because he'd probably look pretty hot.
The first caller asked Howard if he saw the Dancing with the Stars special that aired the other night. Howard had no idea what he was talking about. Howard said that he did read that Jewel was going to be on the show but he doesn't watch the show anymore. Howard said that he will watch Jewel and he'll have to watch the rest of the cast. Howard said that this guy on the phone was retarded or something. He didn't know what he was doing with the call. Artie said that guy calls in often and he's usually pretty good.
Howard had Lisa G come in with her Howard 100 News preview. Robin said she spent the afternoon with Lisa yesterday. Artie said he just noticed that Robin changed her hair back.
Lisa said that Gary was on the CW 11 News on Friday morning doing his Gadget Gary segment. Howard said that he was good on that and Lisa was on the same News show doing the weather in a guest segment. Lisa said that it was fun doing that. Lisa said that the producer told her that Gary did a good job on the show.
Lisa said that she asked the producer how his teeth looked in HD and he gave her a ''no comment.'' Gary asked Lisa if she asked how her face looked too. Howard thought that was a little harsh. Gary asked Lisa why she would ask a question like that.
Lisa said that Richard went up and introduced Coheed and Cambria at a concert over the weekend. They had some audio of that so Howard played that. They weren't sure if he was drunk or not but it sure sounded like he could have been. Richard told the whole crowd that he pissed his pants instead of going to the bathroom when he saw them in another concert. He also told them that he was wearing an adult diaper that night so he could piss himself once again and not miss any of the concert.
Howard said that it's weird that he doesn't even know of those guys at all. He said that Richard was saying that they're the greatest band of all time and he's never even heard of them. They were performing at Madison Square Garden.
Richard said that they were actually opening for Slipknot so he didn't have to piss himself that night. He said that they were great and so was Slipknot. Richard said that they were all great.
Howard heard that one of the Slipknot guys had pissed on the stage. Richard said he heard about that but he didn't see it happen. He also said that he didn't get to use his adult diaper but he was showing it to some of the fans who asked if he was wearing it.
Lisa said that they have an update on Leah Walsh, the former Stern Show intern who was killed by her husband. She said that the husband is to be arraigned tomorrow.
Howard said that Brian is causing a stir because he won't do interviews with anyone but him. Brian said that he testified in front of congress so he figures that if he can handle that, he can handle Howard. Howard said he really doesn't know much about this but he wondered if he can get laid after all of this. Brian said that he and his wife are separated now. He said that they separated in 03 and then just not too long ago they separated again.
Howard asked Brian if he's getting any new pussy. Brian said he thinks that he's off of broads for a while. He said that after all of this scandal stuff happened the women just stopped coming around.
Howard asked Brian about some of this stuff he's read about him. There were some allegations of sexual assault but Brian said that nothing came of that. He said that the Yankees dumped him because of that case though.
Howard asked Brian how he became a trainer and what a trainer actually is. Brian said that you just go around telling guys what to do. He said that he was working with Roger Clemens and Andy Petit around the same time.
Howard asked Brian about what he was doing before he became a trainer. Brian said that he was a cop for a while there in the 17th Precinct. He said that he tried out for the Yankees and got a job with them. He said he was a cop for 3 years and 4 months. He said that he was doing street crime stuff right before he left.
Howard asked if he ever shot a guy. Brian said he didn't and he never killed anyone either. Howard asked him what the biggest deal was that he was involved with. Brian said that one of the biggest was probably busting Linda Evans' brother. He said that there was a bunch of stuff going on with that guy at the time. He said that the guy used to break into his own place to steal stuff to use the stuff to pay for his drugs.
Howard read that Brian was suspended for 30 days after a prisoner escaped. Brian said that he didn't lose that prisoner. He said that the procedure was to get changed into regular clothes and to leave the prisoner to be watched. Brian said that he went up and did his thing and when he came back the prisoner was gone. Brian said that he took the blame but it wasn't really his fault. He said that it was a rookie Sergeant who kind of let it happen. Brian said that he doesn't know if they ever caught that prisoner again.
Howard asked Brian if he ever did steroids himself. Brian said that he didn't. Howard asked if he could benefit from using steroids. Brian said he really doesn't know. He said that he never really got involved in that stuff. He said he just did as the players asked him.
Howard asked Brian about this Roger Clemens thing and how he's claiming that he's a liar. He asked him what gave him the idea to save the needles he was using with Clemens back then. Brian didn't really give a straight answer on that. Howard said that if he didn't have that evidence then he'd have no credibility at all. Brian said that there are other things that corroborate what he has but he can't really talk about that stuff since it's an ongoing investigation.
Howard said that Brian could have given him other injections and Roger could claim that it wasn't steroids. Brian said that the prosecutors may have information that would prove that it was what he says it was.
Howard asked Brian if he was forced to testify. Brian said that they had him on some other distribution charges for doing some stuff for another player. Brian said that he was just the middle guy though and he wasn't distributing to anyone. He said that they came to him and he had to tell the truth because he was up against the feds. He said that he had to assume that they knew everything about his life and he knew that the gig was up when they came to him.
Howard asked Brian if he had protected Clemens and said that he had nothing on him. He asked if he really would have done jail time. Brian said he just didn't want that above his head. He didn't think it was worth it.
Howard said that Clemens was a guy who took Brian in, after the Yankees fired him, and hired him. He said that he doesn't think that he would have gotten that much jail time. Brian said there was another guy who got a year in jail so he could have gotten the same. Brian said that guy refused to testify and they locked him up.
Howard said that he doesn't think that he would have gotten that much time if he had refused to testify. Howard said that he would come clean in a second himself but he's just wondering why he broke down. Brian said that it wasn't worth the risk of having that over his head for 6 years. He said he gets where he's going with the loyalty thing but it was more of a benefit for him to say that he was Roger's trainer instead of denying it.
Artie asked Brian if he had a falling out with Roger before all of this came out. Brian said that he worked hard for Roger but they weren't really ''friends.''
Howard asked if Roger liked him because he was able to make those deals happen. Brian said that he thinks that he liked him because he was hard working. Brian said that he thought that Roger liked that he worked hard and that he was playing baseball with the Yankees and training guys. Brian said that most trainers just come from school and do that. Brian said that he was training him on the field as well as off.
Artie said that Roger probably figured that he would back him up way down the road if he ever did have problems with the steroid thing. Howard asked Brian if he thinks that Roger would have been as good a player as he was if he didn't do the steroids. Brian said that he thinks that he was great in 1996 and he was probably a hall off famer at that time. Artie said he's not sure about that.
Artie said that the steroids give you longevity and that's why it was surprising that Clemens lasted as long as he did. Artie said that he thinks that in 1996 Clemens had only pitched for 11 years and he would have been on the bubble of being in the Hall of Fame. Artie said that now he's in Cy Young's league because he's been around so long.
Howard asked Brian if Clemens should be in the hall of fame. Brian said that it all depends on what transpires with what's going on legally right now. He said that it's about integrity. Brian said that he wasn't sure he could give any advice on that stuff right now.
Howard asked Brian if he's got to worry about going to jail. Brian said he has no worries at this point, he's ''golden'' right now.
Howard asked Brian if he's spoken to Clemens or his wife lately. Howard read that he had given her some injections too. Brian wasn't saying anything about that but he did say that she was hot. Howard asked if he wanted to have sex with her. Brian said no to that.
Howard asked where he shot her up. Brian said that he just told the truth about everything. Howard said he gets that but he wants to know where he shot that chick up. Brian said that Roger was present and aware of everything that was going on with his wife. He wasn't really thinking about sex with the woman at the time. Howard kept asking how hot she was and if she was a 10. Brian wasn't saying. Artie said that he's seen her and she looks like a hotter version of Naomi Watts.
Howard asked Brian where he gave the injections. He asked him that question about 10 times. Brian said that they used to meet in the kitchen for coffee. He still wasn't saying where he gave her the injections. Brian said that he gave a deposition to congress about that and it was just a matter of fact one time thing with her. Brian said that he did that in the master bathroom and Roger was in the bathroom at the time.
Brian said that the shot was given in her belly button. He said that it was just a one time thing to show her how to give herself the injections.
Howard asked Brian if Roger shared any of his road pussy with him. Brian was just shaking his head. Howard asked him if he got any of that pussy. Brian said Roger just did his own thing. Brian wasn't saying much and Artie was laughing saying that if he had just done this with the feds he wouldn't have caused any trouble.
Howard asked Brian where these guys get their broads. He asked if they were groupies. Brian said that it's not the same these days as it was back in the 90s. Brian said that some guys go to regular bars to pick up chicks. They don't even go to strip clubs like they used to.
Howard asked about what this web site is that he's involved with. Brian said ''finally'' like he didn't think they were going to get to that. Howard and Artie asked Brian some other questions about how he got into trouble and how the feds got in touch with him. Brian said that they just called and said they wanted to talk to him so he went in and talked to them. He knew that they had something on him so he had to go in and talk to them. Howard said he would have caved in with them too if that was him. Brian said that he made a stupid mistake.
Howard asked Brian if he ever saw any gay baseball guys doing stuff in the showers. Brian said that he never did. He said he didn't see anything gay. Howard asked if he was being truthful. He asked if he heard any rumors about anything. Brian said that he would tell him if he had heard anything.
Artie asked when he last heard from Clemens. Brian said it was back in December. Brian said that he recorded a phone call with him and played it on TV.
Howard asked Brian who had big penises in the showers. Brian said that he's not a pecker checker so he didn't look at anyone.
Brian said that it's best to come clean because people are very forgiving. Howard said that's true and a lot of people could have gotten out of trouble by coming clean on that kind of thing.
Howard asked Brian about this web site he's involved with. Brian started to talk about that but Howard kept cutting him off. He eventually said that the chick was cute and introduced her. Her name was Mai Tran. Howard asked her where she's from. She said that she's from Boston but she's also Vietnamese. Howard asked her about when her family came over here. She said that her father fought in the war and eventually came over here to keep the family safe. She said that she was being trained by Brian so that's how she met him.
Howard asked Mai about this web site that they have. Mai said that she's a spokesmodel and a host on the site. Brian said that they started out as a goof doing some fake commercials and that's how they got started doing this stuff. Brian said that they did this ''sport no sport'' thing and he met Mai back in 2003 and started training her when she came to him.
Mai said that Brian was a good trainer and she needed him to help her out. Howard asked Brian if he's doing okay financially. Brian said that he's holding tight but it's tough right now because he's trying to keep a low profile. He said that coming on the Howard Stern Show isn't the best way to stay low profile though.
Brian said that he likes to keep a low profile usually and having people stopping him and asking him about A-Rod isn't something he wants to do.
Howard gave Mai and Brian a plug for the web site SportsImproper.com. Mai was saying that you can play chess with models on the site and things like that. Howard said that you can go on the site and play games and just have fun with that kind of stuff. Mai said that they also have news and gossip about sports. Gary said that they claimed that the Patriots were going to be trading Tom Brady but he wondered what was going on with that. Mai said that they're still waiting for that to happen. She said that you can read the story up on the site now.
Mai said that they're giving away a date with a Penthouse Pet on the site too. Howard said that sounds like a cool thing to do. Brian said that they want to build up the site and get some endorsements. He said they don't have much revenue coming in at this point though.
Howard asked Mai about saying that she was recently single. She said that the guy actually broke up with her because she was going to be coming on Howard's show. She said that she couldn't turn Howard down and she let the guy go. She said the guy was pretty well off too. Howard asked if she was dating Imus or something. He wondered who hated him that much that he'd break up with this chick.
Brian said that Mai's boyfriend was afraid that she was going to get naked on the show. Mai said that she would be willing to come back and get into a bikini in 4 months. Howard said that she has to be topless if she comes back.
Howard said that Brian seems like a nice guy. Artie said that he thinks that he does have a lot of regrets about doing this from what he can tell.
Ralph called in and said that this guy Brian is a rat and a creep. He also asked why he saved the needles if he wasn't planning on ratting the guy out. Brian said that it was best that he did save them because they helped him out. Ralph kept calling the guy a rat and a creep over and over again.
Dominic Barbara came in and said that he could have gotten into a lot of trouble for lying even if he wasn't under oath. He said that Martha Stewart went to jail for lying to an FBI agent so that's why it was best that he didn't lie about that stuff. Dominic said that he could have ended up sitting in jail for a year or more waiting for a grand jury to be set up. Dominic said the Feds have you in so many different ways.
Irish John called in and it that this guy really is a rat for saving those needles. John asked Brian what he would say to Roger if he ran into him somewhere. Brian said that he doesn't think that there would be any conversation between them at all.
Howard asked where Brian kept the needles. Brian said that they were just in a FedEx box. John said that he would just plead the 5th if he was in a situation like that. Artie said that they could have kept him locked up in jail all this time if he had done something like that.
John said that Roger Clemens was a hero of his until this came out. John said that this guy is a scumbag and he's sure that he was a dirty cop too. Gary said that they don't know that. John asked Brian if he's going to write a book. Brian said that he's not but John thought he was lying about that.
Gary asked Brian about Joe Torre and David Cohn taking shots at him. Brian said that there wasn't that much about him in the book. He said that they had problems with the way he got his job and how he wasn't properly vetted. Brian said that the business isn't that regulated so he's not sure why they'd call him out on the stuff they did.
Howard said that Mai Tran was very lovely and he will try to check her out on her web site. He gave them another plug for that. Richard then came in and asked if Clemens' ass was shaved or hairy. Brian said that he's not sure, it wasn't really hairy from what he remembered. He said it didn't sag either and he didn't see any dimples or anything.
Howard wishes Brian luck and said that he's not sure what he learned today but he must have learned something about baseball. Robin said that she learned that Brian was a cop before. Artie said that he learned that he had negative feelings toward him before he came in there, now he doesn't.
Howard asked Brian to put it on the record and say that he shot Roger Clemens up with Steroids. Brian wondered if he could say that and then said that he did. Howard wrapped up and went to break after that.
Howard came back and said that the drummer from Buffalo Springfield had died. Robin said she didn't know about that. Howard said that no one cared about the drummer apparently. His name was Dewey Martin and he was 68 years old. The guy had a roommate and that's who found him. Howard said that the guy was 68 and had a roommate, that should make kids pick up a guitar instead of taking up the drums.
Howard and the guys talked about Buffalo Springfield and who was in that band. Howard read that Dewey tried to keep the band going but they didn't have the whole band together.
Howard said that Christian Bale apologized for his outburst on the Kevin and Bean morning show. Robin said that she really hates him now.
Howard said he's been reading about this Echostar company trying to take over SIRIUS. Howard said that he thinks that Mel is going to be fighting it off. Howard said that they're apparently trying to buy up all of the debt and SIRIUS has to owe that money to them instead.
Howard said that SIRIUS could file for bankruptcy and maybe get out of the whole thing. He said that if they did that, they'd have to restructure and they wouldn't have to pay off all of the debt. He said that Echostar wouldn't own the company if they did that.
Gary said that if they get 51 percent of the debt then they'd have the power to buy the company cheaper if they did file for bankruptcy. Gary said that it's very risky from what he's read because they ended up buying the debt last.
Howard said he was reading that they could get rid of the contracts and make him renegotiate. Howard said that he'd tell them to fuck off if they did that. Howard said that if they want to renegotiate then it's going to be for more money, not for less.
Robin wondered what they would want with the company. Fred said that they might be after the repeaters. Howard said he can't imagine them killing off the company. He said that they're worth like 2 billion a year in cash. Gary said he read that they want the satellites for something but he's not clear on what that's about.
Norm said that he had a guy come up to him saying that he could take him back to his wife or anything else he wants. Norm said that he had that going on all weekend long down there. He said that guys were introducing their multiple wives and asking him if he wanted to do stuff with them. Norm said that they don't come right out and say that but that's what they're going for.
Artie said that he has gone deeper into those discussions with those people down there. He said that these people will tell you that they have drugs and they have friends and they all want to fuck. Norm said that he'd be wondering where this extra guy came from that's in a closet jerking off with a half-hard cock.
Howard said that people get bored and they kind of congregate when there's not a lot of stuff going on. He said that's what it was like in Detroit when he was living there. He said that it becomes this weird, creepy thing.
Howard asked Norm if he's in a relationship or if he's playing the field. Norm asked Howard if he's serious or if he's retarded. Howard said he was curious.
Norm said that he was doing Saturday Night Live years ago and this guy Football Williams was on the Donahue show next door in the other studio. He said that Football is the guy who was throwing bricks at Reginald Denny back when the riots were going on. Norm said that the guy recognized Rob Schneider out there and Rob liked him because that guy liked him. He said that's kind of the way he thinks Artie felt about that Brian McNamee guy when he met him.
Norm talked about the article that was in Rolling Stone about Artie and how they called him a liar right in the article. He was shocked that they called him a liar right in the article. He was also compared to Andrew Dice Clay and called Artie an ''Obese tragic clown'' which was really strange. Norm said he didn't like the article and he thought it was the worst thing ever written. Norm said that it wasn't a puff piece, it was a hatchet job.
Howard asked Norm if he's ever been a victim of something like that before. Norm said that he thinks that she went right in there knowing that she was going to fuck Artie over. Norm said that he once had a guy who actually liked him after he did the article.
Norm said that this guy David Edgars wrote this article. He said the guy came in liking him and thought he knew about politics. Norm said that he told the guy he knew nothing about politics, it was Jim Downey who was writing those jokes for him. Norm said that he did the interview with the guy on a day that he had diarrhea. He came to a gig with him and he had to deal with a guy who had diarrhea the night he was doing a comedy show.
Norm said that he was telling the audience that he had diarrhea and did some jokes and at the end he never knows what to do so he just talks to the audience for a little while. Then the article came out and the guy write that all he does in his act is talk about diarrhea.
Howard said that the Artie article is about his drug use and that's what his book is about. Howard said that the reporter was just reporting on a day in the life of Artie and described that. Robin said that Norm should be asking Artie why he'd expose all of that to a reporter like that.
Norm said that these reporters will try to make jokes in their articles but they're just the worst jokes ever. Artie said that he thinks that a lot of these reporters just hate comedians to begin with. He said that they could never be writers on shows that he and Norm have written for.
Norm said that this girl had to fake being into Artie when she was writing this article. Howard asked Norm if he thinks that she was writing a good article on any level. Norm didn't seem to think that was the case.
Artie said that he got the feeling that this reporter was into him because she did talk about how talented he was and how many people were coming up to him hugging him and stuff like that after his show was over. That stuff didn't make it into the article though.
Howard said that Norm has addictions like Artie does. He said that Norm is addicted to gambling. Norm said that's not really true. Howard said he heard that the movie ''Rounders'' was based on Norm's life. Artie said that he knows the guy who wrote the movie was a fan of Norm's but he's not sure that's what the movie was based on. Norm said that he did used to go to that club that they used in the movie.
Howard asked Norm why he went underground to play poker. Norm said he used to do that when he was under age. Artie said that he and Norm used to play back when they first started coming on the show. Artie said that they actually came to the show one night right after going to one of those underground gambling things.
Norm said that one time he had a guy try to hustle him at pool. He said that the guy was doing really bad and he'd miss by just millimeters. Norm said that they were playing for a dollar a ball and then the guy wanted to play for $100 a ball. Norm said that he wasn't going to do that. Then the guy hit him with a stick when he gave his friend some advice on how to beat the guy. The other guy said that he breaks bones for a living and threatened him after that.
Artie said that he and Norm were out playing at this underground thing and he'd lost 2 grand that night. Then Norm mentioned the name of the place on Howard's show and they got pissed about that. They said that it's closed now but it used to be The Mayfair.
Howard asked Norm about what's going on now. He saw some of the upcoming gigs he had coming up in Boston and up in Washington. Howard asked if he's going to Vegas with Artie to do the Sam Simon thing. Norm said that he'll be there. They'll be playing poker together on TV.
Norm said that Sam has this TV show that he's doing and they do it for the Playboy channel. Howard said that it'll be Norm, Artie and Sam up against each other in a battle of poker wits. norm said that they shouldn't be surprised if they have a streaker come out since it is on the Playboy channel.
Howard asked who else is going to be playing. Norm said that Jennifer Tilly, Sam's ex-wife, should be there. Phil Locke should be there too. Norm said that the money goes to a good cause from what he's heard. Howard said that they should be playing for themselves and not for some charity. Norm said that it's good stuff for the world when you play for a charity.
Norm said that he always feels weird when he does charity things because some of the celebrities will be playing to help cure AIDS in Africa and he'll be playing to benefit some tennis club.
Howard said that Norm won $500,000 on ''Who Wants to be a Millionaire.'' Howard thought that he was some kind of Brainiac if he did that well. Norm said that he's not as smart as Brainiac. He said that Brainiac is so smart that you can tell just by looking at his head how smart he is.
Norm said that he ended up giving that money to Paul Newman's charity because he wanted to meet Paul. He ended up getting a letter from him but then he backed out of meeting him at another point because he was too afraid.
Howard told Norm that Gary went out and met Paul Newman and his wife. Howard said that Gary got to walk around his barn looking at all of the stuff they had in there. He said that Norm could have gone out there and wouldn't have been bothered by sick children or anything out there.
Artie said that Regis talked Norm out of playing for the million bucks on that Millionaire show. Norm said that he knew the answer to the million dollar question. They asked what golf course they have a bomb shelter built under. Howard figure that would be Camp David's golf course. Norm said that it would only be interesting on the Golf Channel or something. Howard asked Norm how he knew that answer. Norm said he likes to read stuff.
Howard asked Norm if he knew the four of the courses that they mentioned. Norm gave a couple that he remembered but the correct answer was Green Briar. Norm said that's one of those questions that you either know or don't know.
Norm said that he wishes that he were more entertaining today. Howard told him he was fine. He told Norm that maybe he should get up and juggle or something if he thinks that it went badly. Howard told him that he was actually terrific and he's never seen anyone light up a room like Norm does.
Howard gave Norm some more plugs for his upcoming gigs in Boston and Washington. Howard said that he doesn't think that Norm really has a lot of friends. Artie said that he'd see Norm all the time if he lived out in L.A.
Norm said that he saw something funny on YouTube about Nixon. It was under ''Nixon Archie Bunker'' on there. Norm told Howard about that and what was said in the tapes about Archie Bunker and homosexuals.
Gary said that he was looking at that as they were talking about it and thought it was great. Howard said he remembers that. The guys spent a minute talking about that.
Howard said that Norm is hard to read and he's not sure that he's having fun when he might be having fun. He said that he thinks that Norm would rather be out playing poker than doing stuff like this. Norm said that he and Martin Short were going to be friends but then he thought about how he might have to go to his cottage and hang out and that was always in the back of his mind. Howard said that's the problem with Norm, nothing is cool enough for him. Norm said that he's just too guarded and doesn't want to do things.
Howard gave Norm his plugs and wrapped up with him a short time later. Norm asked Howard what it would be like if they became friends. Howard said that would never happen. They went to break a short time later.
Howard came back and listened to that song for a few seconds. Howard said that it was a very busy show today. He mentioned Brian McNamee and Norm MacDonald's visit and said that they have a lot of guests coming in this week.
Howard said he was listening to the Kevin and Bean tapes where Christian Bale called them. Howard said that he essentially said that he was wrong and what he did was inexcusable. Howard said that he was saying that he was half John Conner and half Christian Bale and he apologized to anyone he could get a hold of. Howard said that's probably the best thing that he could do.
Robin said that some of these people call into the lamest shows to do that because they're not going to offend the guests for any reason. Howard said that he would have accepted that apology if he had called into his show.
Howard played a clip of Richard's dad talking about eating his first rabbit of the season. Mr. Christy said that it was real good cooked on the barbecue. He said that he had taken it away from the dogs that had trapped it.
Howard said that anyone who gets turned off to that is a hypocrite. He said that we eat animals all the time. Mr. Christy is just closer to nature and takes care of that stuff himself. Howard said that he'd get pretty upset if he saw a rabbit being attacked by a dog like that.
Howard said Gary got a call from Carnie Wilson who gets to be the host of the new Newlywed Game. He said that she's very lucky with that. Howard said that he could do that gig and he'd love it. Robin said she was just thinking about proposing bringing that show back recently. She said she thought about it and then saw that Carnie Wilson got the gig.
Howard said that show is a really easy one to do. Artie said that it might be too easy and he could fall asleep doing something like that. Howard said that he would do it exactly like Bob Eubanks used to do it with no energy put into it at all. Howard said that he'd do it the way Ryan Seacrest would do it. Howard did an impression of Ryan doing his American Idol announcing and goofed on him for a couple of minutes. Howard said the guy is fuckin' annoying.
Howard said that he likes having a hard job but he's kind of confused about doing the game show thing. He said that he'd have to just sit back and take it easy if he got an offer like that.
Ralph called in and brought up the Christian Bale thing. He said that the other guy wouldn't shut up and that's why Bale kept going off on the guy. Gary asked Ralph if he was there or something. Ralph said he could hear it in the tape.
Ralph said that he got the iPhone app that lets you play SIRIUS on your phone. He said that it's just streaming over the cellular network so you don't have to worry about losing a signal. They even have the PDT stuff running on the screen so it's all there. Howard said he thinks that's great. Howard said that would let even more people get SIRIUS. Ralph said that you can check it out at NiceMac.com.
Howard took a call from Cyrus who brought up the Echostar thing and wondered what's going to happen if they buy SIRIUS and shut it down. Howard said that he doesn't think hat would be a smart move but that's possible. Robin and Artie said that they could end up owning Echostar at the end of all of that. Howard said that you never know what's going to happen.
Howard said that it's in the newspaper now and he hopes that Janks has a good explanation for all of this. He said he's a Captain Janks fan and he hopes that he's not up to what they claim. Artie said that's fucked up if it's true.
Howard played a clip of Tracy Morgan doing a Christian Bale impression on the set of 30 Rock. Steve got back to his news and said that Dominic Barbara has gotten into some trouble over some stop-work orders that he has apparently ignored. Howard wondered what that was all about.
Steve said that a fan is coming to the defense of Eric the Midget and claims that he may fly to Sacramento just to see the little guy. Steve got in some plugs for the John the Stutterer and Greg Fitzsimmons shows that are on tonight on Howard 101.
Howard said that Beth was doing a make over for the Mike and Juliet show, that's what it was. He said that she had to get right out of there when they did their thing because she became a huge attraction there.
Richard said that he and Benjy went to the event. He said that Benjy was ''BenShe'' and dressed up like a woman. Richard said that there were some odd people there that the really pissed off. He said they interviewed some of the people with masks on but then Benjy got them kicked out.
Richard said that they have little movie theaters there where you can watch demos of video games that are coming out. They went into one of those and Benjy started yelling out questions about how far into the future the game was and things like that.
The caller said that they had a Terminator preview there and the director apologized for the Christian Bale freak out thing.
Howard asked Richard if they saw Beth there. Richard said they weren't there for very long before they got kicked out. Howard said that Benjy has no idea when to act up or not.
Howard played some of the Gary Garver interview with a guy dressed up as Darth Nihilus from a Star Wars game. Then he played a song parody to the tune of ''Iron Man'' with the Darth Nihilus stuff instead. Howard played a prank call that Sal and Richard made using those Darth Nihilus clips too.
Ralph called in and said he had never heard that one before. Ralph said that he went to Comic-Con and the Army had a recruiting station there. He said that they must be desperate if they're there trying to recruit people. He wondered if they'd take Darth Nihilus if he tried to sign up. Howard said that guy is a full blooded Jedi so of course they'd take him.
Howard said that Beth was telling him about the guys acting out the Star Wars scenes at the event. Artie said that's like the behavior of 4 year olds when they do that. Ralph said that he didn't get dressed up when he went. He said that big fat chicks will dress up like Cat Woman.
Richard said he likes how Ralph is goofing on these people but he had a whole bag of stuff that he was carrying around. Ralph said they had a lot of good stuff there that you can't get in other places.
Howard played another Darth Nihilus prank call that the guys made to a telemarketer. They had Darth talking to this telemarketer about going to school.
Jon Hein came in with his Wrap Up Show preview after that. He ran down his list of subjects for today's show.
Robin read some more news about the Grammys and about John Mayer throwing a party for Jennifer Aniston for her 40th birthday party. Howard said he would have liked to have gone to a party like that. He said that he'd like to hob knob with the stars that show up for a party like that. Howard said that Jennifer Aniston and Oprah Winfrey don't seem to be like the most fun people to be around though.
Robin read some news about Usher going to help out his ailing wife who was having some surgery down in Brazil. Robin wondered what she was doing in Brazil getting surgery. Howard had to go to break a short time later.
After the break, around 10:15am, Howard asked Robin to get back to her news but she wasn't in her booth. Robin got back to her news a minute later. Robin said that she tried to go get some ice but there's no ice down there. Howard said that she's busy during every break and she can't leave her booth during the news.
Robin said that Scott is still working on the Grammy stuff so she couldn't get into that. She was wrong about that because she got right into some news about Jennifer Hudson's performance and had some audio clips of her talking about her win. She had a quick clip of her singing too.
Robin played some audio of Robert Plant accepting an award. Howard said that the guy is a fuckin' sell out and he wants to know what happened to him. Howard said that he was yelling at him to play Kashmir while he was singing that bullshit stuff he was singing last night. Howard and Artie threw out a few other Led Zeppelin song names and sang some of those. Howard goofed on Plant for a few minutes. Howard played some of the cool songs that Zeppelin put out and said that Jimmy Page must be freaking out with this.
Robin had Howard playing some of the other performances from the Grammy Awards like Neil Diamond, Kanye West, Lil Wayne, T.I., Al Greene, Justin Timberlake and others.
Robin had some audio of Dweezil Zappa accepting an award and getting all weepy when he talked about his father. That led to Howard talking about how he loved Frank as a person but didn't really get his music. He said that he never responded to him musically. Howard said that he was a great guest on the radio show though.
Robin read some news about Chris Brown and Rihanna backing out of their performances on the Grammy Awards. Howard said that he can't imagine a guy attacking a girl like that. Robin played some of her hit song but Howard cut it off after about 2 seconds.
Robin played some Coldplay clips since they won some awards. They were also on 60 Minutes before the Grammys. Howard wondered where Gwyneth Paltrow was. Robin said that she actually introduced Radiohead last night.
Robin read some news about Ticketmaster screwing some Bruce Springsteen fans when they sold their tickets off to some ticket companies. They were referring people to another site where they had tickets available. Artie said that's what Chris Rock was complaining about with Clear Channel when he was on one time. Howard had to go to another break after that.
After the break, around 10:40am, Howard had Robin get right back to her news. Robin read some news about Etta James talking about Beyonce's performance at the Presidential Inauguration. Now that it's gotten out Etta is saying that she didn't mean anything by it and she was just trying to be humorous.
Robin read a story about Alex Rodriguez being accused of using steroids back in 2003. She said that he came up positive for two different types of steroids.
Robin read some news about the ''Octomom'' who is now out talking about all of these kids she has now. Robin had some audio clips from her interview with NBC's Ann Curry. Howard said that he should give Beth's theory on her too. Howard said that she looks like she's trying to look like Angelina Jolie and Beth thinks that she's trying to be just like Angelina by having as many kids as possible.
Robin read some news about the stimulus package that's in the works. She said that the Senate will be voting on that this week. Howard talked about how bad it looks when President Obama is already going to Camp David for vacation and he's been in office less than a month. Artie said that it's possible that he's working there. Howard said that once they get caught up in that Camp David they stop working. Howard said they should close it down and never let them go again. Robin had some other stories about the stimulus package and how things are going to get worse if something isn't done soon.
Robin read some news about an ice fishing thing where a bunch of people went out fishing after being told not to and when they jumped on this piece of ice they got marooned and had to be rescued. Howard said he saw a guy out on a pond ice skating and it was warm out. He said that he told Beth that there was no way he was going to go in and try to save the guy if he fell in. Howard said that he wouldn't go in to save anyone but his kids but he's pretty sure that his kids would never anything that dumb.
Robin read some news about the bush fires down in Australia. She had some audio clips from some news reports down there. Robin read some news about the movie that was number one this weekend and also about Tiger Woods' wife giving birth to their child. They ended the show after that, right around 10:55am.
Jon asked Gary what he thought about the whole thing. Gary said that he can't imagine going to jail for any friend so he'd probably do the same thing that Brian did. Gary said that he thinks that Brian held onto the needles because he thought that he might need them some day. He said that might be the mind of a cop thinking about things and how they might go down in the future.
Gary said that he doesn't think that Brian was going into the whole thing with a vengeful thought in his mind. He said that he got caught and he just had to do what he did to get out of it. He said that things may have gotten vengeful when things got ugly in the press.
Gary said that he's not a fan of Roger Clemens but you can't argue with his numbers. He said that he was a great player even if you think about him before he was allegedly on steroids.
Gary said that most guys don't get better as you get older but both Barry Bonds and Roger Clemens did so that's one thing that they may have done wrong.
Jon took a call from a guy who said that Brian was a total rat and he was saving those needles to further his career. Gary asked him how that translates to money. The caller said that he's got a web site and he's probably going to cut a book deal. Gary said that he hasn't cut a deal yet so that doesn't translate to money at this point. Gary asked the guy if he would go to jail for a guy like that. Gary said there's no way he would go to jail for a friend. The caller told Gary that he's as much of a rat as that Brian guy is.
The caller said that he has experience with that type of thing and he knows that the guy wouldn't have gone to a maximum security prison. Gary said that he can't know that. He doesn't know where he could end up if he went to jail.
Gary said that if this guy is willing to go to jail for a friend then he's a better man than him. Gary said there's no way he'd go to jail for anyone.
Another caller said that he likes how all of these guys are pissed at Brian and not mad at Roger Clemens. Gary said that they all did something wrong. He said that they're more interested in getting the bigger guys in baseball. Jon said that Major League Baseball is wrong too because they turned their heads and ignored all of this for years.
Gary said that in 2003 they tested to see how wide spread it was and that's when they found out that it was very wide spread. They weren't supposed to reveal the results back then but that's what's coming out now.
Jon took a call from a guy who said that he blames Jose Canseco for all of this. He said that he blew the whistle on all of this and that's where it's all coming from. Gary asked him if he would rather not know that it's going on or if it's just not wrong at all. The caller said that he'd just rather see an interesting game and see some home runs.
Jon said that baseball kind of fell out of favor in this country after the strike and then they got back into it when the big home run thing was going on. He said that there were probably people juicing during that but the fans liked to see the big battle for home runs going on.
Artie called in and said that he was listening to this and yelling at the radio. He said that he was getting livid hearing the guy earlier talking about going to jail for his friend. Artie said that no one in this country would go to jail for someone like that. Artie said that this guy wasn't even that close to Clemens so it wasn't like he was a close friend. Artie said that most people in this world would not go to jail for a Roger Clemens.
Jon asked Artie if he thinks that McNamee was telling the truth across the board. Artie said that he thinks that he was. Artie talked about that for a short time and said that some of the steroid stuff can help guys recover quicker.
Artie said that they're going to have to keep some guys out of the Hall of Fame and put asterisks next to other guy's names and just move on. They have to figure out how to get rid of steroids completely to move on.
The guys spent a few more minutes talking about that and how MLB isn't really saying anything about the A-Rod situation at this point.
Benjy asked if they thinks that this guy Brian is wrong to do interviews about this stuff. Gary said that both he and Clemens are out there going back and forth to discredit each other. Will said that Brian told him that he was really mad about Clemens secretly recording their conversation and talking about his sick kid in that clip. That's why he's out there saying whatever he can about him.
Artie said that the needles thing is kind of creepy but the fact that he's a former cop shows that he just wanted an insurance policy if something did happen.
The guys spent a few more minutes going back and forth with that stuff. Jon asked how they think it's going to end up. Gary said he thinks that they might make examples out of a couple of guys. He said he's not sure how they'll be able to do that though. He said that if they're all doing it then how do you keep just one or two guys out of the Hall of Fame.
Jon thanked Artie for the call but Artie was still talking. Artie said that he wanted an opinion on A-Rod and Clemens from Jon. He asked him what he thinks about the whole steroid thing. Jon said that he wouldn't put these guys in the hall of fame if they did do steroids. Jon said that you can't ignore what they did though. Jon said that he'd have to look into the history but then you don't know what year they started doing steroids. Artie said that they have pictures from A-Rod back in '96 and the difference is dramatic compared to what he looks like today.
Will said that he thinks that Clemens should get into the Hall of Fame no matter what. He said that he was good all along. Gary said that he agrees with him on that. Benjy asked if they had any official stance on the use of steroids. Years ago they didn't but Benjy said that even if they didn't it's still a grey area because then they could get away with doing other illegal things.
The guys went over Clemens' stats from back in the early days and Artie was saying that a lot of guys with stats like that don't get into the Hall of Fame.
Jon let Artie go and took another call. The guy said that every cop learns to cover his ass and they also learn that it's ''first to talk, first to walk'' so that's why Brian did what he did. Gary said that anyone can say that they'd go to jail for a friend but you don't know until it actually plays out.
Another caller asked if they read Joe Torre's book yet. Gary and Jon said they hadn't read it yet. The caller said that Joe talks about some of the stuff that went on with Clemens and he thinks that this guy is telling the truth about him.
Gary said that there was a caller asking if there's anyone playing in the past 10 years that belongs in the Hall of Fame. Gary said that Mike Piazza comes to mind but he wondered if he's under suspicion too. Jon said that everyone is under suspicion at this time. Jon said that anyone who played during this era is going to be under suspicion because of what's going on.
Jon took another call from a guy who said that they have to let these guys in the Hall of Fame because every era is different. Even if the guys were using steroids they're still the best of their time. Gary said that doesn't really make sense because not everyone is on steroids and maybe someone else could have been better if they had used steroids. Jon had to go to break a short time later.
Jon had Teddy play a clip of Norm talking about the Rolling Stone article and how the reporter described Artie as a liar.
Gary said that Norm is a really interesting guy. He said that he was on the show one time talking about how his father was a teacher at a school and how he went to school with a retard and his father kept telling him to be friends with the retard. He said that you never know if he knows that word is offense or if he'd just doing it for comedy.
Jon brought up the Vegas poker game that Artie and Norm will be at. That led to Jon bringing up the time Gary went out there and got bored. Gary said that he was thinking that he was going to hang out with Artie out there but Artie ended up sleeping all day so he had to go find other things to do.
Jon asked Gary if he thinks that he and Artie are okay. Gary said he thinks that they're good now.
Jon took another call from a guy who said that he thinks that the public gets upset with these guys like Brian McNamee is because of the way they're coming out and trying to become famous for this stuff they're coming out with.
Gary said that people want to read about the story though so that's why they get constantly hounded to do interviews and stuff. Gary said that McNamee hasn't written a book or anything so he doesn't seem to be trying to get out and make money off the whole thing.
Will said that he thinks that Brian doesn't like being in the spotlight and he's not out to write a book or anything like that.
Will wondered where this stuff comes from and how Richard got up on stage to do that introduction. He said that's pretty impressive that he got to do that.
Richard came in and Gary told him that maybe he should add a few inches to his shirt because he can see his belly every time he lifts up. Richard said it's a belly shirt like the guy from Coldplay was wearing last night.
Richard said he really likes doing that stuff up on stage and it was such an honor to be able to introduce his favorite band. Jon asked him who his favorite band was before Coheed and Cambria. Richard said it was King Diamond and Stryper before. Gary asked him what was up with that. Richard said that he wasn't into their whole religious thing and he was just into their music.
Jon asked Benjy how he got kicked out of Comic-Con over the weekend. Benjy said he was just irritating. Gary said ''Really? Not you Benjy...''
Richard said that Benjy didn't break character and he was dressed like the ugliest woman you've ever seen. He said that they got dragged out of that Comic-Con.
Jon asked Benjy what he would rate himself at as a woman. Benjy said that he'd say about a 2. Richard said he'd put him right up around Mrs. Garrett from the Facts of Life. They had to end the show a short time later.
Howard started off the show talking about how Al Roker was going to be coming in. He said that would be happening in just a few minutes. Howard said that he had some questions for Al about the kind of money he's making on the Today Show and things like that. Artie figured he must be making 6 figures easy. Howard said he's going to ask for his tax returns so he can see for himself.
Artie said that he was reading about how anyone living in Manhattan who makes less than $500,000 a year is basically broke. He said that Al would need more money than that to live there.
Howard said that guys who are big on TV are starting to lose their jobs to younger reporters. Robin said that they can hire them cheaper than the guys who have been around for a long time. Howard said that Al must be making 7 figures.
Fred said that he read that the rumor is that he's making a million and a half. Howard said that sounds low but it's possible. Howard said he wonders if Al has any demons. He said that the weight gain must be upsetting to him.
Howard said that Randy Jackson seems to be gaining all of his weight back now too. Robin said that it's the demon that causes the weight gain so that's what they need to find out about.
Howard took a call from Eric in Hoboken who asked if Howard has ever been with a girl getting hot and heavy and he has to get in and then she tells him that she has herpes and he goes right in anyway. Howard said that he's never been in that situation himself. He said that he figures that someone he's had sex with had to have had something but he's never had anyone tell him that they have.
Howard said that he's never done that but he has thought about it after being with a girl. He said that he wonders if they had anything and gets kind of freaked out. Howard said that he went out with a woman one time and someone told him that she may have had an STD based on what someone else told him. He said that finding out about that kept him from having sex with her. He said that he didn't keep dating her either. She was also married so that didn't help.
Howard asked Al if he's ever had an experience like that caller was just asking about. Al said he's never had that problem. Howard asked Al if he got to have fun with women while he was the weatherman. Al said that he's just a weatherman and that kind of thing doesn't happen with weathermen.
Howard asked Al about his pay and if he's a millionaire. Al said that he's not sure that he's a ''millionaire'' and asked exactly what that means. Howard said he read that he's making a million and a half a year and that would make sense to him. Al said he's paid very fairly by NBC and he renews his contract every 5 years or so. Howard asked if he gets offers from other networks. Al said that he doesn't play those games. He said that he just makes a deal if they want to keep him there.
Howard said that Al and his wife must get asked to go out to a lot of places. Al said that they really don't do that much of that. He was also saying that he wasn't single when he was on The Early Show.
Howard asked Al if Willard Scott is still around. Al said that he's on the Today Show every morning. Howard said he can't watch since he's there working every day.
Al said that when he got to do weekends at WNBC he thought it was the greatest thing. He said that he used to do the news on NBC and thought it was really cool when he had Don Pardo introducing him.
Al said that he wasn't planning on being on TV. He said that he had a guy put him up for the job up in upstate New York and he tried out for that and did a demo tape. He said that he was a sophomore in college at the time. Al said that the guy, Lou O'Donnell, just passed away last year around the time that his mother passed away.
Al said that he was getting paid $10 per weather report for that job. Al said that he was just trying to be himself on that show and he was only 19 at the time so he couldn't have been all that good on the air.
Al said he got a job down in Washington DC after he graduated. He said that a competitor sent a tape of him down there to get him out of the market. He said that was actually a nice thing to do because he got him another job.
Howard asked Al why he wasn't getting tons of chicks back then. Al said that no one cared. He said that he was just driving to work every day and doing his thing. He said that he's always been struggling with his weight throughout his life. He said that he wasn't even that fat back then but he thought he was so that made things worse.
Howard asked Al if he had a big afro back then. Al said that it was bigger than it is now but not all that big. He was already starting to go bald back then anyway. That led to Howard talking about the picks that the black kids in Roosevelt would keep in their hair. Howard said that they used to have pick fights back then and even he kept one in his hair.
Howard asked Al if he has any demons like they were talking about earlier. Al said that the weight gain is the only thing. He said that he knows that he's never going to go back to where he was after he lost all of the weight. He said that he's gained quite a bit of that back and he will never get back to that. Al said that he's unable to go crazy eating now but he still gained back 30 pounds.
Howard asked Al if he has nightmares about the weight gain. Al said that it was kind of gradual and he doesn't have that much of a problem with it. Howard said that Carnie Wilson is back to being huge again. Randy Jackson is also getting heavy again. Al said he hasn't seen Randy, he doesn't watch.
Howard said he thinks that Randy is gaining a lot of weight though, that's the scary part. Al said that does happen sometimes.
Howard said that Al never had the orgy scene and the two girls at one time thing. He asked Al if he thinks he missed out on that. Al said he's not all that into that kind of thing so he never went after it. Howard said he read that Al doesn't rent porn either. Al said he'd rather go see a comedy than rent porn.
Al said that he has some young kids so he takes the kids to see movies and suggested that people not take them to see ''Coralline'' because it's a very dark movie.
Howard asked Al if he lives in a white or black neighborhood. Al said that they live in a Philippino neighborhood. He said that the school they go to is very diverse and it's about 40 percent not white.
Howard said that Al made another one of these DEA TV shows. He's also the host of the Celebrity Family Feud. Howard said he'd love to do a show like that himself. Al said that he'd be great on a show like that. Howard said that people are afraid of him though.
Howard asked Al about working with Kathie Lee Gifford. Al said they don't really work together but he does see her at work since she's on The Today Show. Howard said that he does watch that show once in a while but they have to learn to ask questions instead of doing the shtick all the time. Al said they're always evolving over there.
Howard asked Al if he asked Kathie Lee any of the questions about her husband cheating on her and having anal with that woman. Al said that he doesn't go there and he tries not to watch those reports about that kind of stuff.
Howard asked Al what kind of money he's making on that Family Feud game. Al said that it's not all that much really. He said that he has a bunch of low paying jobs that he keeps instead of just one big paying one.
Howard said that being the weatherman isn't all that different than being an anchor because it's all show business. Howard asked Al if he knows what kind of money Matt Lauer is making. Al said he really doesn't know. He said that once you go down that road there's no turning back. He said he doesn't want to know how much his co-workers are making. He said that everyone might have an idea about what he makes. Howard asked for his guess at how much he makes. Al said that he has to work with the guy so he can't say.
Fred said that he was reading online that Matt is making $13,500,000 annually. Howard asked how much Al makes according to that web site. Fred said that's where he saw the $1.5 million estimate.
Al said that the stuff you read in the paper is either under inflated or over inflated. Howard said that Al must know something and he's probably already looked into this in a big way. Howard said that he must be pulling an A-Rod. Al said that he's never taken steroids.
Howard said he was looking at the pictures of A-Rod in the paper today and he has ''bitch tits'' and he's not all that well defined.
Howard asked Al if he works out. Al said that he actually does every morning. Robin asked him what he binges on when he wants to go nuts eating. Al said that he eats vanilla ice cream or French fries. Artie asked him if he ever dips the fries in the ice cream. Al just laughed.
Howard gave Al some plugs for this DEA show that he's got out. He said that the show is on Spike TV. He gave him some plugs for that and then asked Al if anyone on the Today Show is on heroin. Al said he doesn't think they are. Artie said that he's seen Matt Lauer scratching himself once in a while.
Howard said that Al got into some trouble for something they had in a promo for his DEA show. Al said that they had to change that but he had nothing to do with it at the time. He said that the people of Newark were upset by the promo and they had to change it. Al said there's a turnaround going on in Newark now and things are getting better. Artie said that people get to Newark and turn around, that's the turn around that Al is talking about.
Gary came in and said that Al produces like 50 different shows. Al said that he doesn't do them all at the same time. Gary said that many of them are on the Food Channel. Al said that he food channel is like his porno. Gary said that he did the Whoopi Goldberg biography, an Intimate Portrait: Judge Judy show and more.
Howard asked Al if Kim Cardashian is really a celebrity. Al said that she is. Al talked about some of the other people that he's had on that show as well.
Gary read some of the other shows that Al is producing and Howard said that was an impressive resume. Howard gave him some plugs for DEA which airs tonight on Spike at 10pm. Al said that he hopes that they can extend this into another season. He said that the next 9 episodes are based in Northern New Jersey. Al said that the agents that run these groups have known each other since they were kids. He said it's very interesting.
Howard asked how much they have to shoot to get these shows. Al said that they shoot 100 hours for every hour of show that they air. They have editors working on the shows in Los Angeles while shooting it on the East Coast.
Howard said that he could imagine getting killed if he went out on one of those rides with the agents. Artie said that he'd like to go out on one of those rides. Al didn't think that would be a good idea. Artie told him that he should combine those shows with the food shows and do a dry rub during a drug bust or something.
Howard asked Al if they're going to find out that he has a second family somewhere. Al said that won't happen. Al said that two of his kids were conceived with artificial insemination. His oldest daughter was adopted. Howard asked if she's going to try and find her biological parents. Al said that's up to her and he would do anything he could to help her find them if that's what she wants to do.
Howard asked Al about the artificial insemination thing and if he was nervous when he went to the doctor. Al said that the thing that made him nervous was that it wasn't going to work. Howard said that Al must have looked at porn in the room that he whacked off in. Al said that he can't do two things at once so he just closed his eyes and thought about something instead of looking at the porn.
Howard asked Al how long he stayed in the room. Al said that it could have been 30 seconds but then he said he was just joking about that. Howard said that he's never given a donation like that but they have to check the sperm to figure out if it's going to work. Howard asked Al if he was afraid that they were video taping him while he was masturbating. Al said he never thought of that until now.
Howard asked Al about taking the cup and handing it to the nurse. Al said that you put it in a bag and hand it to her. Al said that they say that he has low motility and his sperm don't swim very well. He said that the whole process was very long and very involved.
Howard asked Al what he thought about that day when he was masturbating in the doctor's office. Al wasn't really saying but Howard was guessing that maybe he was thinking about the women he works with. Al said that it would have been nice if Sarah Palin had been around at the time. Howard asked Al if he thinks about a woman he's been with or a woman he'd like to be with. Al said he doesn't remember that day though. Howard said he thinks that Al looked at porn. Al said he didn't. He said that he wouldn't want to pick up a magazine in a room where people do that kind of thing.
Howard said that Al came clean today and admitted to masturbating and thinking about dirty scenarios. He said that Al thinks about Matt Lauer, or does he? Howard asked Al if he would ever do gay stuff. Al said that it all depends on the person. He said that Matt is a sweet piece of man candy.
Howard gave Al some more plugs for the DEA show and said that he'll think about riding along on one of those drug busts.
Howard asked Al about covering the inauguration and how that was. Al said it was great because he got one of the first comments from him when he yelled out and asked how the weather was. He said that Obama said ''It's warm!''
Howard asked Al if the kids know how they were conceived. Al said that they do know but they don't know all of the dirty details. Al said that they're only 10 and 6 so they don't know about all of that. Howard wrapped up and went to break a short time later.
Howard came back and said that a couple of weeks ago they were going to do a reading test with Rev. Bob Levy. Howard said that they're doing that right now in the back. Howard said that he has to be down at a 3rd grade reading level or something.
Howard asked Gary what's going on with that. Gary said that he heard it's unbelievable. He said that they're asking him to read words, phrases and paragraphs. He said that Bob gets excited and puts his arms up when he gets one right. He said that they're going to have it ready to play on the air in about a half hour or so.
Howard wanted to take a guess and say that he's on maybe a 6th grade level. Robin said she's sticking to the 3rd grade. Howard said he was going to go with 5th instead of 6th. Artie went with 2nd grade. Fred said that he'll go with 6th grade but he was going to go with 2nd.
Artie said that A-Rod was so great before 2001 and he's not sure if it was pressure that made him do the steroids or not. He said that he doesn't get why these guys put that stuff in their bodies and they don't think about what it might do to them in the future.
Howard said he was looking at this picture of Helena Christianson in the paper today and she was looking amazingly hot. Artie said that she's the one who was heading over to see Heather Ledger the night he died. Howard said he's really fucked up then because he blew it.
Howard said that this ''Octomom'' is in the paper and she's looking like she's getting some plastic surgery to try and look like Angelina Jolie. Howard said Beth's theory is that she's trying to be like Angelina with all of the kids.
Howard read a story about ''Octomom'' Nadya Suleman and how she's unemployed, single and she is on public assistance. She won't call it ''welfare'' though because it's ''public assistance.'' Howard said she's been struggling financially and she's going to just do the best that she can. She said that she thinks that God is going to provide her with the best he can. Gary also said that she has one kid who is autistic. Howard said he was going to get to that.
Howard said that one of this woman's kids has Autism. Robin said she'll probably have problems with some of these new 8 kids too. Howard said that she's got 3 disabled kids and you'd think that she'd want to stop.
Howard read about this woman's mother and how she's even blasting her for having more kids. Howard said they had some shots from inside the home of this woman's home and they have food on the walls and sheets on the windows and things like that. Howard said that she had six kids already and now she's got another 8 coming in. The mother is saying that she's sick of taking care of the kids and she has 8 more coming. She's thinking that she's ready to get out of there.
Howard read about the fertility clinic that this woman went to and how she used the same donor for all of the kids and the guy was a boyfriend at some point.
Howard said that he doesn't know that this woman is trying to look like Angelina Jolie, that's just what it appears to him.
Robin said that the doctor who did this should have his license taken away. Howard said that he read that the guy hasn't commented on this whole thing.
Gary said that Tim doesn't want to talk about this on the air. Tim was there in Gary's office so he told Howard that he would talk about it but he thought that Artie had it figured out the other day.
Tim came in but he had something on his face so Howard asked about that. Tim said that he had something removed from his face and he's not sure what it was yet. He had a bandage covering it up.
Howard asked Tim about the debt that they have to pay by the 17th of this month. Tim said that they have to come up with $175 million by that date. Howard said that if they can't come up with it then what happens? Tim said that Mel is working his magic upstairs and they'll have to wait to see what happens.
Tim said that he thinks that this Charles Ergen wants to take them over but he doesn't know what he wants to do if they do that. Howard said that he doesn't know what they want to do with them. Robin wondered what Echostar was. The guys told her that it's a satellite company and they own Slingbox as well.
Howard said that he wants to talk to this Ergen guy to find out what he wants to do with the company if he takes it over. Tim said that they can't doubt Mel Karmazin... ever.
Howard said that he walks around the halls there and everyone is asking him what's going on. Howard said that's when he tells them that he wants to call the guy and ask him what he wants to do. Howard said he'd even be willing to talk to the guy off the air about the whole thing.
Howard said that maybe Ergen just wants to be friends with him and that's why he wants to take over. Howard said that he had a guy on the phone who can explain to them what's going on. The caller said that he's a finance guy and he thinks he can shed some light on the story. The guy said that SIRIUS has a few types of debt and some of it is unsecured and some is secured. He said that SIRIUS can borrow some money under one type of debt. He said that if this Ergen guy wants to make a play for the company in bankruptcy, that could lead to the people owning stock not getting anything and this guy could take over.
The caller was going through all of this stuff and Howard said it sounds very complicated. Howard asked if he can go home and sleep now. He's not sure if he's going to have a job. The caller said that when a company files for bankruptcy they have to assume or reject contracts so that could happen to Howard. He said that they could assume the contract and continue with it so they could keep Howard around... or not.
Gary said that he heard that Echostar only wants the company for the satellites. Howard said that they'd be walking away from a lot of income if they did that. The company has 20 million subscribers so they'd be walking away from that.
The caller said that they need to get this debt thing worked out and take care of that. The guy said that the net income is almost positive for this company but the economy is screwing things up.
Howard said that he's bored with this stuff. They kept talking about it and Fred said that he read that this guy Ergen tried to buy the company last year but SIRIUS rejected it. Fred said that they have a guy who used to be on the board there on the board of Echostar now.
Howard read that this guy Ergen is known to only take $250,000 in salary and flies on commercial flights. He said that they're also saying that they may have to share rooms if they go out on the road.
Lisa said that Sal asked his wife what she wanted for a gift this Valentine's day and she had already bought something. She bought a hutch for the living room. Howard said that's a major piece of furniture. Gary said that it's probably $1,500. The guys were saying that it was probably a lot more than that.
Howard said that Sal has dug himself a hole with his wife and does things on the air that evokes hatred for him. Howard said that Sal feels that she's not paying attention to him in the bedroom and she's just not with him on all of that and there's no romance there. Howard said that she just went out and bought something for the house instead of letting Sal buy her something. Howard said that Sal isn't the man she expected to be married to and she's not putting out sexually for Sal so they're stuck in a nightmare.
Lisa said that there's a reporter on a web site (TVSquad.com) that's writing about what a role model Howard Stern is. Lisa quoted some of his stuff and he was saying that Howard is very loyal and he treats all people like people. Howard said that this guy Jay is right about that and he's a great person. Robin said that Howard was going to hurt himself trying to pat himself on the back.
Lisa said that they have a story about a web site that's listing the Howard Stern Show as one of the hottest girl on girl kisses. It was the show where Tera Patrick and Devon locked lips. Artie remembered that day but Howard didn't remember it. Howard had to go to break after that.
Howard was reading more about this Octomom and her family. He had audio of the woman's mother talking about how she can't believe that the doctor went through with this whole thing. Robin said that it's irresponsible for the doctor to do something like this. Howard wondered if it's up to him to decide if she should be allowed to do something like that. Howard asked if the doctor could say no. Fred said there is a code of ethics and maybe he violated that but maybe nothing legal.
Howard played the audio clip of this woman's mother talking about how her daughter has no means to support these kids and she found a doctor to implant her. Robin said that one doctor did turn her down so she went out and found another one. The mother was talking about how she hasn't contributed to raising the kids that much and she's just leaving them with her parents instead. She doesn't pay anything for rent and her sense of values is kind of strange according to her mother.
Robin said that people can't get a band around their stomach without being found sane so this is what they should be doing with women who get embryos implanted.
Howard played more audio of the woman's mother talking about what her daughter is doing to her and her kids. The mother is the one taking care of these kids, not the mother of the kids. Robin said that she just buys her kids toys from what she's hearing in this clip.
Howard had some audio of the Octomom, Nadya, herself. In that clip Nadya is talking about how the father of the kids may want to get to know the kids eventually. She said that they talk just once or twice a year. She said that she's not relying on that though. Howard said that this woman sounds really strange and he can't imagine being stuck with a woman who just keeps bringing kids home.
They were saying that this woman's kids are being raised in a 3 bedroom house so Artie said that he grew up in a 3 bedroom house and he was never able to get in the bathroom. He said he can't imagine how they're going to do it with 14 kids.
Howard played more of the audio of this woman Nadya talking about why she had all of these kids. She said that she was a single child and she longed for siblings all her life. Robin said that it sounds like she's torturing her mother to get back at her for not having more kids. The woman only wanted one kid and now her daughter is torturing her with 14. Howard said that 3 of the first 6 kids are special needs kids too. He said that she sounds so fucked up.
Dominic Barbara said that he had a case where he had a woman who wanted kids and she ended up going to Mexico to get it done.
Dominic was also talking about the news story that Howard 100 News did yesterday. He said he has some construction going on and they had a stop order on that but they were able to straighten that out and get it going again. He said that Langford was making a big deal out of nothing and there were no criminal complaints filed against him or anything like that.
Robin asked Bob if he wants his kids to live a life like that. Bob said that he's told his son that he can't get lucky like he got lucky so he has to stay in school.
Bob is trying to have a kid with his new wife. Howard said that he thought Bob was having money problems. Bob said that he's doing good and he's fine. He said that he dropped one in his wife last night and he's hoping that one takes. Bob said that his wife has a whole kit she's using to find out when she's ''ovu-lating.'' Kin of all Grammar said that was one of the words in the test.
Howard said that they're going to find out what Bob's reading level is and what his comprehension level is too. Gary came in and said that they had audio of all of this. Howard played some of that and Bob was having trouble with some words. Bob was just reading words and no one knew what words he was trying to say. Artie said that the last word was ''Cat.''
Howard tried to figure out what words Bob was trying to say. He played one and it sounded like ''Pianist-isimo.'' The next was one ''Re-part-riate'' and then ''Shrarpnal'' which was Shrapnel. Bob said that he has problems with some words like that. Howard had Bob trying to say ''shrapnel'' and Bob wasn't able to do it until Howard slowed him down and had him repeat after him.
King said that this is nothing like he's ever seen in his life. He said he doesn't usually test adults though. Howard played more of Bob's words and tried to figure out what he was saying. He said a few words that he wasn't able to figure out. He said ''Synopsis'' as ''Sin-op-nis'' a couple of times and then got it right.
The guys were asking Bob if he knows what any of those words mean. Bob said that he didn't know a lot of them and when he did give a definition of the words, he had Artie dying with laughter.
Howard played more of Bob's reading and screwing up every other word. Then he'd get a whole sentence correct and then screw up every other word when they got a little tough. Howard asked King what he does when he's done reading. King said that he asks bob what he just read meant to him. Howard played Bob's answer and Bob was saying that they were doing that to drive him crazy. Then he gave his idea of what the story was about and he was wrong about it.
Bob was telling King that he had no idea what he had just read. King said that Bob only got 2 out of 10 questions right on that particular test. Bob said that he did better on the other tests.
Howard said that they guessed earlier in the show and they were going to find out what his reading level was. King said that he's actually at a grade 6 level. Howard said that Fred got it right then. Howard said that Bob was happy about that. Bob said that he thought he was at a 4th grade level so he was thrilled.
Gary said that his kids can read better than that. He said that Bob isn't being truthful about this today because he figured that he was at an 8th grade level when he spoke to Will yesterday. Bob said that he knew that he'd test at a lower grade though.
Howard asked King of All Grammar what Bob understands and what kind of reading comprehension he has. King said dthat Bob got 2 out of 8 questions correct on a 1st grade test. In second grade he did better and got 7 out of 8 correct. His actual level is probably a 3rd grade reading level. Howard said that's better than he thought it was going to be. Bob said he's not sure how he gets through life but he does just fine.
Howard asekd Bob how much reading he actually has to do. Bob siad that he doesn't have to read anything at all. RObin asked him how he got through school. Bob said that they just let him get by. King said that sometimes they do that.
Bob said that he got grades of 65 that were just good enough to pass him through. Bob said that he eventually dropped out of school becasue he coudln't take it anymore.
Gayr aksed Bob if he reads his contracts. Bob siad that the contracts are very simple and he doesn't have problems with that. He said that they're very basic. Artei asdi aht they really are simple and they just spell out what he's going to get paid. Artie said that he gets what Bob is talking about because he was in school and they just passed him through to get him out of there. Howard said that Artie is able to read though.
Howard asked Bob if he's back to drinking. Bob said that he has gotten a little fucked up a couple of times. He's also on pills for his shoulder. Bob said that he may have slipped with the coke once in the past 2 years. Bob said that he isn't back on coke regularly.
Howard said he's been hearing that Bob is back on it all. Bob said he's more normal than any of those fucks in the back. Howard asked him if he wanted to take a drug test. Bob said no. Artie said that he believes Bob and if he's saying he only used coke once, then he must be seeing things.
Bob said that he got Artie some 5 Hour Energy to get him through the show. Bob said that he uses it and it really works.
Howard said that Bob is going to be with Colin Quinn up at the Treehouse Comedy Club in Connecticut on Saturday. Bob is also going to be with the Killers of Comedy out in San Francisco. Howard said that Bob may not be able to read well but he is very funny.
Bob said that he's got a new line up of him, Colin Quinn, Nick DiPaolo and Jim Florentine. Bob said that he had to get those guys since Artie doesn't call him anymore.
Howard said that Bob may not be able to read or understand what he's reading, but he is funny. Howard said that Bob is also on Miserable Men on Sunday nights on Howard 101 at 7pm. Artie said that he'd love to call Bob to open up for him because he loves to pay an opener 5 grand.
King of All Grammar wanted to get in a plug too. He said that he brought some cookies down and said that you can get them at Park19Cookies.com
Howard took a call from a guy who said that it's amazing that Bob can survive in a world like this without being able to read. Howard said that Bob has street smarts though. King said it's a once in a lifetime thing to have a successful career like Bob has and you really should stay in school.
Howard started to wrap up with the guys but Bob got in a plug for the Killers of Comedy On the Road shows that are on Howard TV right now. Howard said that he had to mention that and said that there are 3 episodes up and they have some great footage from back stage at the shows. They had to go to break after that.
Howard read some of the stats on Bush's vacations and how much time he spent on vacation. Howard said that these guys want that job but then they take all of this vacation. He said he's nervous about this guy right now, he just started the job. Robin said that some people can multi-task. Howard said that Clinton didn't go to Camp David until after his fourth year.
Howard read that Jay Leno is predicting that his new show isn't going to get huge ratings. Howard also said that someone told him that Stuttering John has developed some kind of strange accent. Howard said that his friend said that it's either Scottish or English. Howard said that the friend doesn't want to be identified. Robin guessed that it was Ross Zapin. Howard said he's not saying, but it wasn't Ross.
Howard played Stuttering John's intro for Jay from recently and he definitely had some kind of strange accent. Howard said that he must have taken speech lessons or something.
Howard played clips of John doing his demo tape for the Tonight Show with Scott the Engineer. Howard compared that to the new clip where John sounds like he's doing something like a mix of Monty Python and an Australian accent. Fred did his impression of that.
Howard said that John really has the best job in show business. Fred did more of his impression as if he was an English guy. Howard let the rest of the clip play through.
The guys were goofing on John and Howard was asking Fred questions as if he were John. Fred was stuttering up a storm and goofing on John's plans to be become English.
Howard played another Wendy voice mail where she's singing and slurring her words. Wendy sounded like she was half asleep. Howard said they have half a show just in her voice mail. Howard said that it's cute to listen to one or two of those but they have to listen to a bunch of them in a row every morning.
Howard said that Bobo calls in a lot too. He had one call that Bobo calls in with every week according to Gary. Howard said that he keeps pitching the idea over and over again and they keep rejecting it. Howard said that he calls up like it's a fresh idea every time.
Howard played the voice mail and Bobo was saying that he's been told he looks like Dave Grohl and he'd like to get people from the street and they'll have him and Dave in the studio and people have to pick him out of the two. Bobo said that maybe they can give him a prize if the people pick him instead of Dave Grohl. Bobo is willing to do anything they want him to do.
Howard said that the funny thing is that Bobo thinks that he looks like Dave Grohl and that people wouldn't be able to tell the difference. Artie said that he likes Bobo a lot but he may just be retarded. Artie said that anyone who would put that thing on his head has to be.
Howard played some voice mail from Crazy Alice too. Alice was going off on Robin about the things she said about her living in the ''coon neighborhood'' and how she doesn't like it. She really went off on Robin and didn't go off on Howard that much. Howard said that her new neighbors must love her. Howard said he could do 2 hours a day on just voice mail.
From my Wrap Up Show write up on February 4th:
Jason said that he's also afraid of having ugly kids. Jason said that he was at a family gathering and said that some of the kids aren't athletic and they're not that attractive so he's not sure he wants to bring an ugly kid into the world. Jason said that he doesn't want to get involved and give birth to a kid that looks like him, acts like him and all of that. Jason said that he just doesn't want to do that to a kid.
Gary said that Jason did the right thing marrying a good looking girl. Jason said that he's seen the rest of her family. He said he doesn't want to give his kids body hair like he has. He just doesn't want to do that to a kid. Jason said he wouldn't have answers for his kids either if they asked him about getting girls and things like that.
Artie said that he might have a point there. He said that his parents were pretty good looking and he thinks that he could have a good shot at having decent looking kids if he had any. Robin said that you never know what you're going to end up with though. Artie told Robin she's right, he shouldn't have kids.
Howard played the clip where Richard and Benjy interviewed this guy who was dressed up as ''Hunk'' from either the movie or the video game. Richard and Benjy goofed on the guy since they weren't able to understand much of what he was saying since he was in a mask. The guy was yelling through his mask and wouldn't take it off so they could hear him. He had an accent so that wasn't helping.
Richard and Benjy jerked him around for a couple of minutes and eventually let him go. Richard said the accent made it twice as hard to understand.
Howard said that Richard and Benjy went to this video game demonstration and Benjy got them kicked out of the event. Benjy just kept yelling out questions and they had to kick him out of there since he wouldn't shut up. Howard played that clip and Benjy just kept yelling out questions about when the game took place and stuff like that. They told him to be quiet but Benjy would keep yelling. They kicked him out of that and Benjy started to make girl noises as they were doing that. Gary told Howard to keep playing that other clip because it does get good. The people in the room told him to shut the fuck up and that he was ruining it for everyone.
Howard said that Benjy got kicked out and he started to do this ''BenShe'' voice. He asked what that sounded like and Benjy did a quick impression and it didn't sound that different.
Richard said that Benjy hid under a table at one point and when they dragged him out he started to scream like a girl. Richard said he loved that sound. He said that they were dragging Benjy out from under a table when he was making that sound. Benjy got kicked out as he was asking security what kind of characters they were. Benjy started to make some very odd sounds when they were kicking him out of the building.
Nick talked about Bob Levy's reading test a little bit and said that he saw one of the contracts that Bob signed and it was a pop-up book.
Howard and Nick talked about President Obama a little bit. Nick said that he's kind of liking this guy. Howard said that he tried pulling for Bush when he went in because the guy is running the country and you want it to work out. Nick is doing the same thing for Obama.
Howard said that we're all learning that black people are just like everyone else. Nick said that Obama isn't black, he's half black. Nick said that his nipples are darker than Obama. Howard asked if Obama is hiding the white half of his family or something because you don't really see them anywhere. Robin said his mother is dead so he must be sticking with his in-laws.
Howard asked Nick about this Octomom and Nick was saying that she had 8 umbilical cords with those 8 babies and her uterus must have looked like the back of an entertainment center. Howard liked that joke. Nick said that he has to be on the ball when he's working with Bob Levy.
Howard asked Nick if he's still trying to get a radio show. Nick said he did a demo show back in July but he's still waiting to hear from Tim. He said that's when the stock was still at 18 cents. Nick said that he's hoping that Howard sticks around for another month so maybe he can get a job.
Howard said that he's guessing that Tim has no money to pay Nick. Nick said that's what he figured. Nick said that he wrote an angry e-mail to Tim but he didn't send it. He said that he kept it in his folder for about 6 months and they sent it last month.
Howard asked Tim to come in and explain why he didn't hire Nick. Nick said that he didn't have to do that. Nick said that he's going to be working with Levy and Colin Quinn down in Atlantic City on Friday night at the House of Blues. Howard gave Nick some plugs for some of his other upcoming gigs as well. Nick is going to be on Jimmy Kimmel Live this month too.
Nick talked about how he had to audition in front of just one woman for Jimmy's show and it was awful. He said that he had to walk through the whole act for her and they told him that he won't have to do that this time. Nick said that he knows how to keep it clean. nick said that he'll open with two ''cunt'' jokes. Howard said he thinks this will be a great break for Nick and Jimmy's show is going up in the ratings so he'll get some good exposure.
Howard said that maybe Nick will get a radio show or a sitcom or something. Howard said that maybe Jimmy will tap into something for him. Howard asked nick what he'll be doing on Jimmy's show. Nick told a couple of jokes that he'll use on that show. He thinks that some of that stuff will clear.
Nick said that he has a new CD out called ''Funny How'' and it's available at NickDip.com. He said he'll be using some of the jokes from that in his Jimmy Kimmel appearance. Howard said he had to go to break a short time later but gave Nick a bunch of plugs for his upcoming gigs. You can find those on Nick's web site. Nick also mentioned that he'll be roasting Larry the Cable Guy on Comedy Central in March too. Howard asked Nick how he writes jokes for something like that. Nick said that they're basically the same jokes they used for Jeff Foxworthy.
Artie said that if Larry the Cable Guy came on the show as himself, and not Larry, he'd be a great interview. Artie said that he turned himself into a multi-millionaire. Nick said that the guy was doing that character on a ton of radio stations and he turned himself into a huge star doing that. Howard said that if he were that guy he'd keep doing that stuff too. He said that the kid who played Napoleon Dynamite should do the same thing with that character. Howard said that he'll never be in another hit film if he doesn't keep doing that character.
Artie said that he'd like to talk to Larry and find out how he stopped being a comic and became that character. Nick said that he's a good guy and he really likes him. Nick said that no one is laughing at him when he lands his helicopter in the parking lot at his gigs. Nick said that he really does have that kind of money too.
Howard took a call from a guy who said that Nick told a joke that was the funniest thing he'd ever heard. He couldn't quite remember it but it was something about Manute Bol's taint. Nick told that joke and also said that he's joked about guys being as black as a Pepto-Bismol shit. Howard didn't get that reference. Robin said that it might not be that widely known that those shits are so black. Howard went to break a short time later.
Howard came back and asked what happened to that kid in the Wallflowers. Robin said that they put out another album after that one. Howard said that he was good, better than Bob Dylan. Robin said he definitely had a better voice.
Howard asked Gary if he had Ergen on the phone yet. Gary said that he did have his phone number but hadn't called yet. Howard told him to call and let him listen in as he makes the call. Howard said he can't stand everyone asking him what's going on with this guy and now he'll ask him what's going on himself. Gary called and got someone to transfer him over to Mr. Ergen. Gary said that security didn't seem to know who Ergen was.
Howard said that they have problems with Echostar if they don't know who that guy is over there. Gary left a number for the guy to call them back at after turning off his mic.
Howard said that he doesn't like walking around there in the halls with people asking him what's going on. Howard said that he's just going to find out what the guy is up to himself if no one else is going to call him.
Artie said that he'd play a game of pool against the guy if he's a gambler like some people were saying. Howard said that he'd love to have Artie play Ergen for the company. He could do a whole pay-per-view event based on that.
Howard gave Nick DiPaolo some plugs and Artie slipped in a plug for one of his shows during that. Howard said that Bruce Springsteen is one step closer to American Idol because he has a Guitar Hero game coming out next month. Artie said that's fine, Led Zeppelin did that too.
Steve said that Double A is out claiming that he's an official scout for Howard TV to find Miss Howard TV. Doug Goodstein said that he told Double A that he could go out and recruit them but he didn't say that he was an official scout. Doug said that he thinks that he may have interpreted what he said in the wrong way.
Doug got in some plugs for the Miss Howard TV calendar and mentioned that you can get that on HowardTV.com
Steve read a story about the air base that Artie and the guys flew through when they went over to Afghanistan. Artie interrupted him and then got into an argument with him about something that went on over there. Steve said that Artie didn't want the news team following him around and that's why he kept them from going over there with him. Artie said that it was about the number of people who were going. Steve said that it was all about Artie and it wasn't the money or anything like that. Steve said that they should have been over there covering the trip.
Artie told Steve he thinks that he's crazy. Gary said that he got that rap from Steve the other day and he got the impression that Artie just wanted to go do something good without them following him around. Steve said that the company wanted them to follow him around. Howard said that it's about what Artie wanted. Steve said that it was like a big f-you to the Stern fans.
Steve said that they're not closing down the air base to the U.S. troops yet. Steve got in a couple of other things before wrapping up his news preview. Howard said he wasn't sure what Steve was talking about there with Artie.
Robin also had some news about Rihanna and Chris Brown and they're saying that Rihanna had bruises and a fat lip and bite marks on her from the fight that she and Chris Brown allegedly got into. The guys spent a short time talking about that story. Robin had Howard play some of a song that the two of them performed together. Artie said that was off the album ''Mind Numbingly Dull.'' Nick said it sounds like something that Ellen would be dancing to.
Robin talked about Alison Krauss and Robert Plant's big win at the Grammy's. Howard said that he wants to know what happened to that guy and he can't believe that he's doing that kind of crap. Howard said that he looked like he had just stepped out of middle earth and he looks terrible. Howard said he used to believe in Led Zeppelin but now he doesn't. Robin had some audio of Robert Plant talking about the album and Nick said that was actually Stuttering John.
Robin had some audio of Paul McCartney talking about the work he did with his former group. In that clip Paul talked about that body of work and said that he thought that the body of work was ''fine.'' Paul also talked about how Dave Grohl got involved with him. Paul said that his usual drummer wasn't available so Dave filled in. Artie said that was actually Bobo playing drums, not Dave Grohl.
Robin said that people are getting a little bit crazy. She said that people have filed charges against a man who called 911 when his local burger joint was out of lemonade. Howard had the audio of that 911 call and the guy was complaining about his local Burger King not having the drink for him. Howard said they really do have to go after these people who abuse 911 because it's out of hand. Howard said he'd like to know how the 911 people understood what that guy was saying because he just heard a bunch of mumbling.
Robin read a story about Ben Roethlisberger claiming that he had broken some ribs before the Super Bowl. Howard said that's something else to be able to do that with broken ribs because that's very painful. Artie said that's a really big F-you to the Cardinals to say that.
Robin read some news about the Westminster Kennel Club dog show that's going on. The PETA people are staging a demonstration for that and comparing it to the KKK. Howard said that people are really involved with their dogs and at least they're paying attention to the dogs and not ignoring them like so many people do. Howard said that some people go out and buy pets and either get rid of them or just ignore them.
Robin read a story about how they're working on getting TV installed in contact lenses. Howard said he would never do that. Robin said that it would rely on people's body heat for power. Voice commands or a wave of the hand could control the TV.
Howard gave Nick some more plugs for his gigs at Caroline's comedy club tomorrow and next Wednesday.
Robin said that Amazon.com has introduced the new Kindle 2. She said that the first Kindle sold so well that it sold out and was out of stock for a long time. Howard said that it's great that people are reading books like that. Howard said it sounds like an interesting product. Robin said that it can actually read to you but Howard said it probably sounds like a robot when it does read to you. He had to go to break a short time later.
After the break, around 10:05am, Fred played another song parody for Robin. Howard said that was ''Robin's News Blues.'' Robin wasn't around so Howard wondered what was going on with her. Howard said he wanted to get out of there. Howard asked the guys to let her know that it was her turn. Gary said that he heard that she's in the bathroom. She might be having issues.
Robin came back a short time later and said that she was in the bathroom down the hall because someone was in the bathroom in there and she wasn't able to get into that one. Howard said that the new rule is that the only people to use that bathroom during show hours are Robin, that's it. Nick said that he was in the bathroom taking a little tinkle. Howard told him that he held Robin up by doing that.
Robin got back to her news and read a story about porn star Stormy Daniels running for senator. Howard said he hates when porn stars do stuff like this. Robin had some audio of Stormy talking about why she's doing this. Howard said he's sick of everyone.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked what he thinks about this Captain ''Sully'' Sullenberger guy. Howard said that it's too much already. He said that the guy did what he was supposed to do and landed the plane safely. Howard said there's so much incompetence in this country that people are surprised when the guy does his job correctly.
Nick said that he has a different take on that. He said that they make heroes out of sports stars when this guy Sully is actually the hero. Howard said he is a hero. He said that they'll call anyone a hero these days but this guy is a real hero. Robin said that the guy saved his own life and the other people were just also-rans.
Howard asked what Sully is going to do now that he's done this amazing thing. He said that the guy flew for like 40 some years. Nick figured that he should write a book and get out of the pilot thing. Howard said that he can't go back to being an airline pilot because he's the biggest guy out there.
Howard took another call from a guy who said that a guy who saves people from a fire is a hero, this guy is not a hero. Robin agreed with the guy and said that he's really not a hero, he was just doing his job. Nick said that he went above and beyond duty and he is a hero.
Howard said that Doug Goodstein is a hero, he ran down to the World Trade Center on 9/11 and took pictures with a camera he stole.
Howard said that maybe Robin is right about Sully and maybe he's not that much of a hero. Robin said that the rest of the crew were doing things too, it wasn't all Sully. Howard said he wouldn't have helped anyone out if he was on that plane.
Nick said that some of those people got connecting flights that night and he can't imagine that. He said that they were in a plane crash, got out, waved down a ferry, got in a cab and flew home. Nick said that the guy landed the plane with no engines but Robin is saying that the flight attendants are heroes for helping people get out of their seats?
Robin said that she's very concerned about the Dancing with the Stars line up. She said that Jewel is going to be dancing against her husband. Robin read some of the names of the other people on the show. Howard said that it was sounding pretty good to him. He said that he can't believe that Belinda Carlisle is going to be on there. He said that's the one that really surprises him. Howard said he'll probably watch it and give it a shot. If he gets bored with it he'll stop watching.
Robin read some news about A-Rod admitting that he took steroids. She had some audio of him admitting to it. Howard gave some advice to Rihanna and told her that she should date Sully because he's not going to beat her up or bite her face.
Howard said he'd really like to know why A-Rod is dating Madonna of all people. He said the guy is young and he could have a lot of chicks that aren't 50 years old. Nick said that maybe he's getting his steroids from her.
Robin read some more news about A-Rod and had some people commenting on his previous claims that he played clean.
Robin had some audio of President Obama trying to get people to jump on board with his stimulus package. That led to Howard playing some audio of John the Stutterer talking about the stimulus package on his show last night. John spent a couple of minutes talking about that.
Robin read a story about a study that was done about men who smoke marijuana getting testicular cancer. She asked if Jason is smoking a lot of marijuana. Artie said that he might be but Jason doesn't plan on having kids. Robin read that long term marijuana use may also cause male impotency.
Robin read a story about a guy they're putting to death down in Texas. Robin had some audio of them reading his last meal. They said that he asked for two spicy leg quarters and two spicy pork chops. Nick said that he had to figure out what ethnicity would want chicken and pork chops.
Robin read about this public assistance thing that the Octo-Mon is talking about not being welfare. Robin said that she has supplemental security income coming in because of the three kids who are disabled. Robin said that she also insists that she's not on welfare. Howard said that this is an illness and even her mother wants out of this whole thing. Nick said they need to hit her in the pubic bone with a snow shovel.
Robin read that Owen Wilson and Kate Hudson are back together. She read through some details on that. She also had a story about Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow possibly having problems. Howard said that he thought that Kate was very nice when he met her but he never did get the chance to get her. He said that he and Kate had exchanged numbers and they were supposed to get together but nothing ever happened. Howard said that she was in her 20s at the time and he thinks that she may have been into him at the time.
Robin read that Jerry Springer isn't coming back to ''America's Got Talent'' and Mariah Carey's husband will be taking that slot.
Robin read that Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow weren't out partying after the Grammys. Chris was seen spending time with a woman from another band the whole night at the after party. Robin ended the news and Howard ended the show around 10:30am.
Gary said that his chair was stuck and he wasn't able to lower it so he felt kind of odd. Gary eventually got that fixed.
Gary said that they had this guy who could administer that test to Bob. They put him in Sal and Richard's studio and had him record it in there. Jon and Gary talked about the reading level and the reading comprehension levels. They were also talking about Bob's street smarts.
Gary wondered how Wendy the Retard would fare in that test. Jon said that he thinks that she might not get as high of a comprehension level as Bob did. She might be able to read better though.
Gary said that Bob might have some kind of learning disability or something and he can't process some stuff the right way. That led to Jon playing a clip of Bob trying to say some of the words that Howard was giving him.
Jon asked Gary if anyone there who could give Bob a run for his money. Gary said that they were saying that they should give Sal that test. Gary said that he thinks that he could comprehend a little bit better than Bob. Benjy said that Sal would be a good one to take the test. He said that he thinks that Sal is above average intelligence.
Gary said that they've concentrated on Bob's English but he'd like to know how his math skills are. Teddy said that they do their stand up and sell merchandise and split it like 17 ways so he might be good at math. He said that he might be like an idiot savant.
Jon asked Gary about calling Charles Ergen and how that went. Gary said that he was calling Colorado and he's not expecting a call back for at least another 40 minutes. Gary said he thinks that he will get that call and the guy might just be willing to talk to Howard.
Jon took a call from a guy who asked if they think Howard is being truthful when he talks about running off the airplane and not helping anyone out. Gary said that Howard has told a story about seeing a guy getting robbed in the subway one time and not doing anything about it. Gary and Benjy were saying that Howard isn't willing to take a personal risk like that. Gary said that he's not sure if that's selfish or just being scared.
The caller asked if Howard could pay off the interest that SIRIUS owes right now. Gary said that might be a conflict of interest but he'd mention it to Howard.
Jon took another call from a guy who asked if they talk to Bob Levy off the air. Gary said he talks to him. The caller asked how he gets through life living like that. Gary said that Bob is able to get by and he's not stupid. Benjy said that if Bob had that passage read to him he probably would have understood it. Gary said that he can't have that done all the time though. Benjy said he thinks that he would have understood it if they had read it to him though.
The caller said that he thinks the evolution of the people on the show is great and Robin has been great lately. Gary said that they've been having a lot of fun on the show lately.
Another caller said that the clips of Levy trying to read sounded like when they do phony phone calls where they cut and paste voices together. The caller was also saying that he thinks that they'll end up building that woman a house on that show with Ty Pennington (Extreme Makeover). Jon said that TLC does a lot of shows like that but there's a lot of backlash against this mother so there's no telling if she'll get a show like that.
The caller said that he has a 5 year old that's autistic and he gets into very physical fights and he can't imagine what that woman is going to do with her 14 kids if she has autistic kids in her house.
Jon took another call from a guy who said he wanted to talk about Levy. He said that Levy was only on for like 15 minutes and he thinks that he passed out listening to him. The guy said that Levy always complains about not having a show and he only gets a voice on the Wrap Up Show. Gary said that Bob has Miserable Men that's on for four hours every Sunday. Gary said that they didn't have Bob on to do a straight interview and it was a bit that they were doing. They didn't have him on for a long time.
The caller said that he thought that Gary was runing Artie's career and that's what he should have told him. Gary said that's the point though, he doesn't run Artie's career at all. The caller said that he does and he doesn't. The guy said that Howard does control him though. Gary sadi that Howard doesn't really control him either.
Gary asked the guy what he's doing today. The guy said that he's actually drunk as shit today. He said that he's 25 years old and retired. He said he didn't want to talk about finances all day long though. Jon let him go a short time later.
Jon took another call from a guy who was also drunk and not making a lot of sense. Another caller asked if Bob is doing a shtick when he can't read like that. Gary said that's very real. They do stuff like that to Bob on the Miserable Men show as well.
The caller was also talking about something that some radio guy had said about Howard on ESPN radio. He thought that it was kind of a dig at Howard and he didn't think it was very cool.
Another caller asked the guys how they feel working for a pussy like Howard who can't stand up to a fat, bloated pig like Artie and not let him go. The guy said that Artie is a lying, homophobic asshole. Gary asked Chris if he was gay. The guy said that he was correct. The caller said that Howard doesn't pay any attention to that stuff and he just feeds into his addiction and that's going to end up killing Artie. The caller said that Artie was basically blaming Howard for his heroin addiction last week on the Wrap Up Show. Gary said that's not how he heard it.
Gary said that there's something strange going on today with the callers. Jon said that there really is something odd going on and he wanted to start the show over again.
Shuli came in and said that they've been putting in stuff for Bob to read on Miserable Men and he'll read anything they write down for him. They also have callers spell out words and Bob tries to pronounce them. He said that Bob has been fucked up all along.
Irish John called in and asked if maybe it's a medical problem that Bob is having because he's shaking and stuff these days. Shuli said that Bob has some serious issues. He said that Bob is getting old at an alarming rate but he needs some therapy. John said that his girlfriend thinks that Bob might need to get checked out neurologically instead of giving him reading tests. Gary asked if people think they're listening to some other show, this is the Howard Stern Show and they're not looking to get everyone help.
Another caller asked why Lisa G and Steve Langford aren't investigating this Echostar thing instead of having Howard talk to them. Shuli said that they don't know what they're doing back there in the news office. Shuli said that he's not even sure what they're up to because he doesn't talk to ''those people.''
Shuli said that Steve loves the show and he thinks that he felt like he could paint a picture of what that tour was like and he wasn't allowed to go. Gary said that he doesn't think that Artie cared about it either way.
Steve came in and said that if you listen back you'll hear Artie calling him names but he think that he just wasn't being honest about why he wasn't allowed to go. Steve said that Artie lets a lot of lies come out and he has to be reminded about those lies.
Steve said that Artie started this thing about why they weren't allowed to go on that trip. Steve said that Artie throws up more lies when he wants to try and cover things up. Steve said that they were willing to pay to cover the trip and Artie is making it seem like that wasn't the case.
Gary said that Artie has a problem with some things that Steve has said about him when he does his news reports. Steve said that he ties things in with the stories from the show and that's why he brings them up when he does those stories. Steve said that he's giving the listeners something to relate to that story. It's the moment that he uses to get people's attention. Steve said that Artie is a baby and that's what the problem is.
Steve said that there are professionals in the room, like Gary, who stop and answer questions intelligently. There are others who run and who are babies. Steve said that Artie is a baby and that's about the only one who is a baby. Steve said that Robin always stops and talks to him. Gary said that she has blown off Shuli when he's asked her some questions. Steve said he doesn't have that problem.
Gary asked Steve what Artie should do if he wants to have a hooker and a joint when he's doing a trip like that. Gary said that Artie can't be himself when Steve is hanging around. Steve said that he doesn't have to be around him the whole time. Teddy said that the USO told Artie that it was just him and four people and that was the ''tour.'' Teddy said that Artie told him that he wanted him there and he just couldn't do it because he didn't have enough seats.
Steve said that he was told ''no'' by Artie and it wasn't the company not wanting to pay for it. Jason came in and asked Steve why he let Artie tell him no when he should have just gone out and covered it. Steve said that they had the army involved there so they couldn't just go over and cover it. Gary asked if they had discussions with those people. Steve said that they had other people, outside of this building, who wanted them to cover it and Artie put a stop to it.
The guys asked Steve who actually told him ''no.'' Steve said that it was Artie but the guys didn't think that's what he was saying. Gary asked Steve if it was Artie who said that he couldn't go. Steve said that after all of that it was Artie who said that he didn't want them covering it.
Jon ended up getting upset and said that they were going around in circles. Gary asked Steve again, who it was that told him that they couldn't go. Steve said that the answer was just no and things were done through channels. Jon had to put that on hold for a few minutes while they went to break.
Jon said that Artie is able to do shows like Conan and Kimmel. JD told Steve that he's joking around half the time. Steve said that they went to see Artie do a book signing and Artie showed up late to that. Steve said that it was like Artie was saying ''drop dead'' to the fans who showed up to that.
Steve said that he was sitting on the bus when Artie left that place and Artie told him ''Steve, not right now.'' Steve said that Artie was being a baby there too but JD and Teddy didn't think that he was doing anything but joking around.
Jon said that Artie might be entitled to some privacy. Steve said that he shouldn't have him there if he doesn't want the coverage. Steve said that Robin can handle that kind of situation but Artie can't. Steve said that Artie needs to just deal with it.
Jon said that he's heard Robin throw a fit with Steve before. Shuli said that they're just doing their jobs. Steve said that they have to let the fans have access to some of that stuff, that's what the show is all about. Shuli said that there are a lot of things that they haven't been allowed to report on so they're not telling everything.
Steve said that if they had been allowed to cover that USO Tour then Artie would have come out looking like a national hero. They had to keep some of that USO tour thing quiet but it ended up in the NY Post the day after they were asked to keep it quiet.
JD said that Steve is making gigantic leaps with Artie saying that not letting him go on that tour was like giving the fans a big F-you. Steve said that's just what it was like.
Steve said that they got some good interviews from Gary, Nick DiPaolo and Dave Attell but almost nothing from Artie.
Jon took a call from a guy who said that Steve just seems to be wanting to get into an argument with Artie. Jon asked Steve if that's what he's doing. Steve said that he just covers the news. He was kind of blowing that caller off so the guys pointed out that he's this huge defender of the fans but he's blowing them off himself.
Jon said that Steve usually rides these stories to the end and he keeps digging into them. Steve said that Artie lied again on the Stern Show today so he was calling him out on that. Jon said that Artie has said that he only lies about drug related things to protect his family. Steve said that he doesn't think that's the case. Shuli said that Steve is a big fan of Artie's and he's almost doing this as a tough love kind of thing.
Steve said that Artie's book is magnificent and it's probably the biggest thing he's done in his career. Steve said that when Artie said ''what's happened to me'' on the Wrap Up Show last week he thought it was heart wrenching.
A caller asked if Langford was the hall monitor in school when he was a kid. Steve laughed and said he wasn't. Jon asked Teddy if Steve creeps Artie out when he's around him. Teddy said that there was one time when they went out to L.A. and Artie took them all out to breakfast. He said that they were up really early and they were dying to eat. Artie ordered a ton of food and Steve said that he was so hungry that he could eat the asshole out of a skunk and that really drove Artie nuts. Steve said ''Poor little baby...'' when he heard that.
Jon told Steve that he had to move on so he wanted a final assessment on this story. Steve said that some people can't handle the truth, and they know who they are. Jon let Shuli and Steve go after that.
JD said he thinks that Steve is the Benjy of the Howard 100 News and he doesn't know when to turn it off. He said it's very weird.
Jon had Teddy play some audio of that part of the interview. After the clip JD said that he doesn't want to think about Al Roker masturbating.
Jon asked JD if he thinks that Al Roker thinks about the kind of money that Matt Lauer is making JD said that he doesn't see him as a money counter. Jon asked if he thinks that there's anyone there who does that. JD said he's pretty sure that Scott Salem does that. Jon asked JD if he does that. JD said he tires not to and he's pretty sure that he makes the least amount of money there except for Steve Brandano.
Jon took a call from a guy who said that he appreciates what Steve does and he's done some good stuff like getting High Pitch Eric's dirty underwear for the guy who paid for them.
Jon took another call from a guy who said that he thought that the Al Roker interview was okay but nothing that special. He didn't even know what he was in there promoting. Jon said that Al was promoting that DEA show and even offered Howard a ride along in one of the cars.
Jon took a call from a woman, Frenchie, who said that she wanted to talk about Bob Levy. She said that there are 44 million people in this country who are functionally illiterate. She said that Bob isn't joking about that stuff because she sat in on the Miserable Men Show one time and saw him reading and it was very real.
Another caller said it's great when they get a guy like Al Roker on the show talking about masturbating. The guy was also talking about Brian McNamee being on the show and wondering why he wasn't answering any of the good stuff. Jon said that he did reveal some things but he understands his frustrations.
Jon, JD and the caller spent a short time on that subject talking about Sully and whether or not he was a hero.
Ralph called in and said that he didn't hear Robin's comments but he thinks that it's a pretty amazing story. He said that the story was amazing and a miracle to him. Jon said that Robin was saying that he wasn't a hero and he was just doing his job. Ralph said that she should be saying that about the firemen who went into the World Trade Center on 9/11.
Benjy was telling Ralph what Robin was saying about that guy and how he was just doing his job. Ralph said he doesn't care and the guy was a hero no matter what they say.
Ralph also said that he agreed that Al Roker was a bore this morning. He said that he's sickeningly sweet and he didn't want to hear him talking about jerking off. Ralph said he doesn't care anything about that guy.
Ralph also said that he agrees with Steve about Artie being a big baby but he does have the right to say that he doesn't want Steve to be with him on that USO trip. Ralph said that Artie doesn't have to let him into everything he does. Jon had to let Ralph go since his phone connection was so bad.
Jon said that Steve has a unique way of getting into people's faces and that combined with Artie can lead to conflict.
Jon took a call from a guy who said that he got douche chills off of Langford today. He said that Steve may have been giving them bullshit today but he's the one always saying he doesn't like the bullshit. JD said that Steve is kind of psychotic sometimes and they weren't able to get a straight answer out of him today.
Jon said that it was tough to try and get information out of Steve today. He said that he's sure they'll find out more about it as time goes by though.
Another caller said that the fans are getting tired of the way Artie is treating people lately. He said that at some point they have to pick a side. Jon said that they can't really do anything with Artie because Howard doesn't think there's a problem at this point. Jon said that Artie isn't being disloyal to the show or anything either. They had to end the show a short time later.
Howard started off the show talking about how he's starting off the show telling them that Artie isn't coming in today. He said that it's another sick day for him. Jason was the one who got the call. He said he doesn't know what's going on with his boy but he hopes for the best.
Howard had Jason come in and tell them about the phone call. Howard said he's pretty sure that he's up to something. Jason said he didn't have a recording of this one. Jason did an impression of the call and said that he's actually very worried about him.
Jason said that Artie told him that it's not drug related but he told him that he didn't have to go down that road. Jason said that Artie said that he wasn't going to hurt himself after he kept telling him how bad he sounded. Jason said that he would have recorded the call if it wasn't on his cell phone.
Howard asked Robin what she thinks. Robin said that Artie has said that he's never been sick so that's all she's saying. Fred said that maybe once in a while he can be sick so maybe this is the first time. Howard asked Fred how many times he's been out sick. Fred said he ''zero point zero'' but he has a different constitution than Artie has.
Benjy said that he thinks that if it is drug related, then maybe he's home withdrawing from drugs. Fred said that he's thinking that maybe it's drinking. Gary said that he could be right on that. Gary said that Artie talked about something big that happened in his personal life that was really bothering him and that might be what it is.
Fred said that Norm was in town last night so maybe they went out drinking. Robin asked when they're going to be going out to Vegas. Howard said that he'd be really worried if he missed that trip.
Howard played some audio of Norm talking to Conan about the Leno thing and telling him that Leno out foxed him again by getting that 10 o'clock show. Norm also talked about how Leno has out foxed Johnny Carson, David Letterman and now Conan.
Howard said that Norm is one of those guests that might not get to be on the Tonight Show when Conan makes his move. He said that Norm is one of those quirky guests that might not make the cut.
Howard said that Tim told him that Comcast was the number 1 largest out there. Howard said there's a tremendous business there and people shouldn't be fooled by what they're reading. Howard said that he does know that there are 20 million subscribers that generate 2 billion dollars a year and they have advertising revenue as well.
Howard said that the companies had to put up a tremendous amount of money to get started. Howard said that cable companies don't have to create content, they just replay stuff that the networks give them. Howard said that the satellite radio companies had to pay for their content like football, baseball, Howard Stern and Mad Dog Russo.
Howard said they have $4.5 billion of debt that they have to pay off. They have very high operating costs as well. Howard said that he's not sure what those costs are but it's hard to secure loans to pay off this debt. Now the company is looking at restructuring.
Howard said that they're going to look at restructuring and they're going to go to a bankruptcy attorney to figure out how they can restructure. Howard said there's this guy at Echostar who wants to buy up the debt and last year he had made a bid to buy the company. Howard said that everyone sees something going on there and they want to be part of it. Howard doesn't think that they're going out of business.
Howard said that from what he's been reading in the paper, the company may have a hostile takeover attempt coming from this Echostar guy. Howard said that he apparently didn't offer enough money last year so now he's buying up their debt.
Howard said that the guys who play for billions of dollars are playing for big bucks. Howard said that they're playing like it's Monopoly money. Howard said that Mel is being crafty by doing the bankruptcy thing and they're speculating that Mel just wants to figure out a way to get out and sell off the company.
Robin said that she didn't know that's where they were at with the company. Howard said that no one really knows exactly what's going on. Robin said that Mel has been hiding lately. Howard said that Mel has said ''No comment'' to all of this so he's not sure what his plan is. Howard said the company is very valuable so there is some kind of game going on.
Robin said that there haven't been any town hall meetings there lately either. Gary said there was one a couple of weeks ago. Gary said that it was so big that it wasn't held there in the lobby like past meetings have.
Howard said that this guy Charlie Ergen might end up owning the company and he's a very wealthy guy who probably wants to make a lot of money with that place. Howard said that it could be Mel and his group too but he's not sure where they're going to end up. Howard said as long as they get paid then they'll be working there.
Howard said he thinks that this is just growing pains for the company. Howard said they were brought in to put the company on the map and that's what they did. Howard said that this stuff is out of their control.
Robin asked Howard if he's concerned. Howard said he's not concerned. He said that he and Robin have very little to do with this but the news reports make it seem like they do. Howard said that this will be a successful business and it will survive. He said that it will be huge some day.
Howard read an article from the NY Post about what's going on with all of this. He said that after reading that he thinks that it's good that there are people interested in buying the company. There is some kind of negotiation going on there from what they're saying.
Howard read that they're basically playing chicken with Ergen and that might not be the best thing to do. Ergen could end up taking over and the stock of the company could end up being even more worthless than it is now. Fred suggested burning it because that would be more cost effective.
Robin asked what happens if the company is worthless and the stock is no longer worth anything. Howard said that you'll find him on the roof of the building ready to jump. Howard said that he doesn't think that they're folding up the tent and going out of business. Robin said that she's getting some chilling feelings because she remembers hearing the Air America people saying the same thing when they were going under.
Howard said that it is possible that they could lose their jobs. He asked Robin if she's sorry that she bought those $800 bottles of wine with his money. Robin said that she wants to pay Howard back for that. She said that she wants Howard to have the money back and she'll even give him back the car that he gave her.
Howard asked Robin what she thinks about all of this and what her predictions are. Robin said that she banks on Mel and he must have a plan. She said that he's been in some pretty scrappy fights in the past and he's always come out on top. Howard said that he's going with Robin on that. He doesn't know what's going on for sure but he does believe that he's on the side of satellite radio.
Howard said they described Mel as being like Captain Kirk from Star Trek because he always finds his way out of situations like this.
Howard read the article about Chris Brown and the comments that Jay-Z made about him. Rihanna is Jay-Z's ''artist'' and he got very upset when he heard the news. He apparently said that Chris messed with the wrong crew. Chris Brown allegedly left Rihanna with bite marks and bruises on her body. Howard said that he read that she was unconscious in one article.
Howard read that Rihanna and Brown were in a Lamborghini on their way to a party and that's when they got into this fight and Chris allegedly ended up hitting her. Robin said that she would have stayed in jail until this was over if she were Chris Brown.
Howard read some more about it and said that sometimes the woman won't press charges after thinking about these things. They may be looking into it more to make sure they can convict him without her testimony. Robin said that she really should press charges because she could end up being a heroine for doing that.
Howard read that Jay-Z is very protective of Rihanna and people will actually go over to him before approaching her. Howard said that he likes this story, it's wild.
Robin said that she hopes this kid doesn't end up dead. Howard said that this was some associate saying that he was a walking dead man, it wasn't Jay-Z himself.
Howard said that the article he was reading said that 104 players failed the steroid test back in 2003 and the other names on that list haven't been released yet.
Howard said that he's sick of hearing about this stuff and the MLB is ignoring the other 103 players and not doing anything about it. He said they should leave A-Roid alone and go after the team owners instead. Robin said that other people are being accused of protecting guys like that.
Howard said that he saw the cover of the new Sports Illustrated Swimsuit edition and the girl on the cover is Leonardo DiCaprio's girlfriend. Howard said that she's really hot. Howard said that this is why people want to grow up to be actors. Howard said that the guy is good looking and talented and he's got millions of dollars. Howard said this girl, Bar Rafaeli, is after someone who has money and is good looking so that's what she found with Leonardo. Howard said she has to be careful with that because he might not end up marrying her. Robin said that Leo doesn't stay with girls like this for long. She said that he could dump her at any moment.
Robin said that they haven't looked into some of that stuff. She said that she's glad that Rich is making sure that Sal and Richard have piece of mind during this. Howard said that they'd be ready to kill themselves if he didn't reassure them.
Robin said that she was on a plane last night in coach and some guy came up to her and said that things must be really bad if she's in coach. Howard said that she's gone form buying $800 bottles of wine to flying coach.
Rich said that they could end up turning the company around with this reorganization. Howard said that he's not worried about them getting rid of him at all. He said that the company must know that he brought over millions of listeners so they would keep him on. Howard said that if the new owners don't see it that way then he'll just have to deal with it.
Howard said that he can go to work anywhere that he wants to but he likes it there. He said he loves the company.
Howard said that Beth wants to save every animal but he has to keep her from bringing them all home. Howard said that Beth told him about this bull dog that she saw at this shelter and how the dog went right into her lap when it saw her.
Howard said that she was rubbing the dog's belly and told him how soft it was. Then she looked down and realized that she was massaging his balls. Howard said Ralph heard that story and asked Beth why she doesn't rub his balls. Beth told him to get into her lap.
Howard said that sometimes he looks at his balls and he has hair down there that's longer than his penis. He said that some of the hair gets that long and then it's time to trim. Howard has an electric shaver that he has to charge up. He said he ran out of juice in the middle of shaving down so he has patches of weird things going on there.
Howard said he found a grey hair on the shaft of his penis while he was shaving. Howard said he quickly got rid of that thing. He said he doesn't need Beth being reminded that he's 55 years old. Howard said that he doesn't think that he'd ever dye his pubes but he might. Howard said his hair is naturally black but he does have some grey in there. Robin said that it's not that noticeable though.
Howard said that he's gone to beauty salons to get stuff done to his hair but it's never fun. Howard said he pretended that it was okay to be there but it's really not.
Howard said that some of these women go in and weigh like 500 pounds and end up getting their nails painted up. Howard said that he doesn't get that because they're so fat and it makes no difference.
The caller asked Howard to play a prank call that Sal and Richard made to Eric the Midget one time. Howard didn't remember the one that he was talking about. Richard came in and said that it's actually from K-Rock and they don't have it in the system yet. Howard told him to get it in there and he'll play it.
Howard asked Henry if he just got out of jail. Henry said that he got out a couple of weeks ago. He was in for about a week. Henry said that he was smoking outside and drinking and he got into some trouble for that. He got arrested for that.
Gary asked if they know anyone else who has gotten arrested for smoking. Henry said he had warrants. He said that he had two warrants so that's what he got into trouble for. Howard said that Henry had a woman there and he wondered how he gets women all the time.
Henry put his friend Lisa on the phone so Howard asked her how Henry manages to get anyone. She said that's what they asked her last time. She just has Henry living with her and she has all kinds of stuff going on in her life with Henry. She said that she brought Henry in for rehab and the next thing she knew he was in jail.
Howard asked Lisa if she's lonely and desperate and why she's hanging around Henry. She said that she's not lonely and desperate and she can have a lot of fun with him when he's sober. Howard asked if she's in love with him. She said that she loves him but she's not ''in love'' with him. Howard asked if she has sex with him. She said that she doesn't because he's got a wet noodle.
Lisa said that Henry wanted to get Viagra but he's not healthy enough for that. Lisa said she has to bring him to the hospital today because his stomach is bothering him. She said that he has a lot of fans out there and they make appearances and stuff. She said that the fans love him. She said that he even sells ice picks on the internet. She told Howard she'd send him one. Howard said ''Oh thank you'' but didn't sound like he was excited about it.
Henry got back on the line and Howard ended up asking him if the rules aren't supposed to apply to him. Henry said that of course they apply to him. Howard said that no one wants to see a drunken guy walking down the street with four open containers on him. Henry said that there are no kids walking around where he's drinking out on the street. Howard told Henry that he has to play by the rules. Henry said that he hasn't committed a felony in over 25 years. Howard congratulated him on that.
Gary came in and asked how a guy like that can be afraid to smoke outside when he's stuck an ice pick in someone's head. Howard told Henry that he would be great on Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew. Howard asked him if he'd do that. Henry said that he would go. Gary said that he would be so good on that show. Howard said that he'd be working, getting paid and people would love him. Howard said that he'll end up being a disaster. Howard said that he can imagine Henry banging Amber Smith on that show.
Howard told Henry that he should contact this Dr. Drew. Henry said that he was offered a shot on the show but he turned it down. Howard told him that he really should do it. Henry said that Andy Dick is a neighbor of his and he knows that he's on that ''Sober House'' show. Howard said Andy must be doing really bad if he lives near Henry. Henry said that he lives in a really nice house. Howard said that's just because that woman lets him live in her house.
Henry got in a plug for his Mob Art that's available on eBay.com
Howard played some audio of Andy Dick talking about his time on ''Sober House.'' Andy was talking about what a mess he is when he drinks and how his career is in the shitter. Andy started to break down as he was talking about what a mess his life has become.
In the call Richard wanted Eric to become a professional wrestler and the call really didn't go anywhere. Howard asked who the fuck would request that call. He said that the caller must be trying to sabotage his show or something. He said that maybe he works for Echostar and they're trying to make the show shitty so they can renegotiate his contract. Howard said that it might have been Charlie Ergen on the phone requesting that prank.
Howard had Eric on the phone so he told him about how shitty that call was. Eric took forever to answer when Howard said hello to him. Eric said he didn't hear him pick up on him.
Eric asked if they recorded his show last night. Howard said that they gave up on that and he can't force JD to listen to that radio show he does. Eric said that it's not a radio show, it's an interactive internet show.
JD came in and asked Eric to give them some highlights of the show. Eric said he didn't have any highlights. Howard said that Sal and Richard wanted to redeem themselves with a better prank call to Eric. They had called a black woman one time with Eric audio clips so he played that call instead.
Eric said that his co-host wanted him to apologize to JD on his behalf. Howard had no idea what he was referring to. Eric said he was talking about making JD sit through the show.
Howard got a note that said that their web site, JFSC.tv, was updated and working better. JD said that the camera is working better because they have an updated web site and things are working better. Gary said that there's a funny thing on that site where it says that people can advertise on their site if they want to, but they don't have any advertisers.
Howard told Eric that he should be on camera all day long and they'd get a lot more visitors on the site. Howard asked him how long it's been since he went to the Bunny Ranch. Eric said that the last time was on New Year's Day. Howard said he must be all backed up and that's why he's so agitated.
JD said that they might want to talk to Eric about his room mate walking in on him jerking off one time. Eric said that was a long time ago. Howard asked Eric how that happened and if he was naked at the time. Eric said he didn't remember what he was in but he may have been in his PJs. Eric didn't know anything so Howard hung up on him and told him to call back when he knows. Howard said it's tough to get a story out of that kid and it's like pulling nails.
JD said that he did have some audio clips from the show last night. He said that it was just one of those average 30 seconds from his show. It was Eric and his co-host King talking about one of the girls on American Idol. King asked Eric what he thought of the girl but Eric wasn't saying much. Howard sarcastically said ''Wow... we'll play a lot more of that...'' and then went to break.
Howard came back and said that it was good that Artie wasn't there because there's another Mets player that has full blown AIDS. Howard said that his wife is making the claim and the guy is claiming that he didn't have AIDS and then he said that he was raped by two Mexicans or something like that.
Howard said that Artie is always joking that the Mets are gay. He said that they're all allegations of course but now two Mets are being accused of being gay.
Howard read the article about this guy and how his ex-wife is accusing him of having AIDS while the guy is saying that he doesn't have AIDS but he wants to keep his health status private.
Robin said that maybe Artie knew something all along. Gary said that these are all allegations and there isn't anything proving that the Mets are gay. Howard read more about this guy Roberto Alomar and the accusations that his ex-wife is making about him.
Howard said that he was watching Battlestar Galactica and really liking the episodes he was watching. Howard said that the Sci-Fi channel did a great thing by giving the show enough of a run to give them an ending. Howard said that was a really cool thing for them to do. He said he hopes that they don't go bankrupt.
Howard said he watched that show and then watched American Idol. Howard said that Beth was in her jammies and she was looking good so he was hoping that they could have sex. Then he had to take a shit so he had to do that before sex. Howard said that he cleaned himself back there with his baby wipes and poked those things up there and made sure that he was clean. He said that he got into bed but didn't want to do anything with her because he was afraid that he'd stink.
Howard said that he's always got a little bit of a smell there even if he does clean up that well. Robin said that Howard must not be fully evacuating when he goes to the bathroom. Howard said she must be right.
Lisa said that she's heard about people having heart attacks on the toilet from pushing too hard. Robin said that can be a problem if you push too hard. Lisa said that's not the way she wants to go.
Howard told Lisa she looks good this morning. He said she looks healthy and something else was going on. Robin said it might be the make up. Howard said that she must be on a man hunt.
Lisa got to her news preview and said that she spoke to a doctor about Artie's problems getting out of bed. She said that the doctor was saying that it might be time for him to take anti-depressants. Robin said that even Artie was saying that he might need that. Lisa said that Artie might be upset about the Valentine's day thing since he's single right now.
Lisa said that High Pitch Mike has been going out to gay clubs in the city. She said he stayed out all night one night and didn't leave the bar until 6am. Howard said that he's really going crazy with this gay thing now that he's out of the closet. He said he has to be careful going out like that. Lisa said that Mike still hasn't been intimate with another guy since he came out of the closet.
Chris said that Howard has probably tried every approach with Artie so far. He asked if he has been in pretty good shape for months at a time. Howard said he always thought he was fine but then he finds out that he's been fooling them.
Howard said that Rolling Stone article really captured what Artie's life is really like. He said that's basically what Artie's book was like too. Chris said that this is ridiculous and Artie isn't John Belushi and he can't lead this path that Belushi went down.
Chris said that Artie is wasting his talent and he shouldn't be doing that. He said that he's got it made right now and he's doing great in his career.
Chris told Howard that he has to stop talking about this retirement stuff. Robin also asked him if he's okay with this bankruptcy thing. Chris said that he went in and spoke to Mel Karmazin the other day and wanted to work out something so he could bump up his budget. He said that Mel is willing to let him do what he has to do to keep that budget where it is. He said that he wasn't told to cut himself back or cut the staff or anything. Chris said that he's not sharing rooms with anyone on his upcoming trips or anything yet. He said he doesn't get the impression that they're about to fall apart.
Howard said that the company is in tremendous debt because of the start up costs for the company. Howard said that they have to create content, the hardware and so much more and they had to spend a lot on that. Howard said that the fact that this guy Ergen wants to take over might be a good sign. Chris said that it's a very good sign. Howard said that he still thinks that this is going to be the dominant medium for radio.
Robin said that Mel said something interesting to Chris. She said that Mel said that ''I'' will back him up with this contract. Howard said he meant the company would back him up.
Howard said that Chris signed on to get $3 million a year there. He asked Chris if he would buckle or go back to terrestrial radio. Chris said that he will not go back to terrestrial radio. Chris said that he might buckle if they asked him to renegotiate. Howard asked him how his show is going. Chris said that he doesn't curse but he allows it on his show. Chris said that he might throw Howard a bone with a curse once in awhile but on his own show he doesn't curse.
Howard asked Chris how he thinks his old partner Mike Francesa is doing with his show. Chris said it depends on who you ask. He said that the ratings seem the same over there at WFAN. Chris said that he's spoken to some people who say that they're getting murdered in some areas. Chris said that he really doesn't know the answer to all of that and he has no reason to lie about that.
Howard asked Chris if Mike needed him or if Chris needed Mike. Howard said it seems that Mike is the loser in all of this. Howard said that he should have the ratings there and asked Gary to get them for him. Howard asked Chris if he's heard Mike's show at all. Chris said that he hasn't watched or listened to him at all.
Gary had some ratings information for them. He read that stuff to them and WFAN had fallen for the third consecutive month. They were down overall. Gary said that the ratings dropped for the whole station but Gary was still reading to see where their old show was at. Gary said that they didn't have specific afternoon ratings.
Howard told Gary to tell Tim to get him the full ratings report or people would be fired. Chris asked Howard why he's so wrapped up with this. Howard said that he always looks into this stuff with people who took over for him.
Howard said that there was some other drama in Chris' life to talk about too. He said that he's heard that Chris has spoken to Mike twice since he left. Chris spoke to him at an event that they were both at and they just talked about sports, the old station and all of that. Things were fine then. Chris said that he just saw Mike two Monday's ago at the Super Bowl and it was kind of awkward. He said that they were both at an event to cover and they were in more of a competition at that time. He said that was awkward for him.
Howard said he heard that Chris went down to the Super Bowl and they went to this Radio Row where they wait to interview people. Chris said that was true. Howard said that Mike decided that he didn't have to be at Radio Row and set up a hotel room for himself to ace out the other reporters. Howard said he heard that no one showed up at Mike's hotel room. Chris said that it was a hotel lobby, not a hotel room, but that was basically true.
Howard said that Mike thought he was so big that he could get people to do his show. Chris said that the guys would have to walk 8 blocks to do the interviews and they're just not going to do that. He said that Mike only had 26 guests that week and Chris had 56.
Howard said that Mike was friendly with Bill Parcells and he didn't give Mike an interview. Chris asked how he knows that. Howard said that he follows everything that goes on there and that's how he finds this stuff out. Howard said that's great that Mike's best buddy Bill Parcells didn't do an interview with his best buddy. Chris said that was kind of odd. Chris said that he only did two shows and both of them were on SIRIUS.
Howard said that he's heard that Mike is really upset about this whole thing. Chris said he hasn't heard that. Howard may have been making that up.
Gary said that he heard that Chris and Mike got into a fight over Parcells years ago and they didn't speak to each other for weeks. Chris said that he got into it with Parcells too but they've made up. Chris said that he was very vocal with some of the stuff that Parcells did and Mike took Parcells' side. Chris said that it was a tricky situation.
Howard said that it's great that Parcells did that interview even after all of that stuff. Chris said that he had a bunch of great guests on that Friday before the Super Bowl. He also got to interview Bruce Springsteen the day before.
Chris said that his wife really liked the interview that Howard did with Paul McCartney. He said that Howard has a new fan in his wife because she didn't really listen to him before that.
Howard asked Chris about the Bruce interview and asked if he learned anything. Chris talked about some of the stuff that he learned and said that he was prepared for the interview. Chris said that he got back stage at a Bruce concert one time and gave the guy hugs like 4 times.
Robin kept calling Chris ''Mike'' during the interview so Howard finally corrected her on that. She didn't even realize what she was doing.
Howard asked Chris what he thought of Bruce's performance. Chris thought he was great. Howard said that some people think he was lip syncing. Chris said that he definitely wasn't lip syncing, he knows that for a fact. Howard said that he thought he did a good job too.
Howard asked Chris about having Joe Torre on his show live. Chris said that Mike had him on over the phone but he had him in the studio. Chris said that Joe was nearby getting ready to do Letterman so it was easier for him to show up there instead of going out to Astoria Queens to do a show.
Howard said that it would be great if they canceled Mike's show. Chris said that they're not going to do that. Howard said that he thinks that Chris is proving that he was the power on that show he did and he might just prove that when Mike gets canceled.
Robin asked Chris how satellite has freed him. Chris said that he can do anything he wants on that radio show. He said that he likes having that freedom and he has 5 hours to do what he wants. He said that no one is telling him how to do the show and he can put anyone on there he wants.
Howard asked Chris about this A-Rod dating Madonna and if he thinks that there's something wrong with him. Chris said that he's been saying that Madonna is old and a has-been for a long time now. He said that she must be getting into his head and confusing him because she's even dragging him into the Kabalah thing.
Howard and Chris talked about the steroid story a little bit. Chris had some details on all of that and shared that stuff with Howard and Robin.
Howard said that he had a quote from a reporter who said that Chris was invited on Letterman to be a forced and cackling clown. Howard said that he doesn't see him that way at all and he wondered what was up this guy's ass. Chris said that reporter doesn't like him or Mike. He said that the guy wants every sportscaster to be vanilla and boring.
Howard asked Chris what Tim Sabean has been eating lately. He said he knows that his office is right across from Tim Sabean's office. Chris said that he does eat a lot and he hates to see that egg yolk dripping from his cheek.
Howard said that Chris didn't like the ''Dark Knight'' Batman movie. Chris said he just can't get into it. He said that he did think that Heath Ledger was good in that role. Chris and Howard talked about some other movies as well.
Howard said that he loved The Wrestler, Slumdog Millionaire, Gran Torino, Taken and a bunch of others. Chris didn't like some of them. Howard said he liked the one that Woody Allen just made called ''Vicky Christina Barcelona.'' They rattled off a bunch of other movies and compared notes on them. Chris hadn't seen a bunch of them but said that he would get out to see them eventually. He said that he's got little kids so he doesn't have that much time to do that.
Ralph called in and said that he's never been a fan of Chris or Mike or whatever his name is. Ralph said that he agreed with him on the Dark Knight movie and said that the best one was the original TV series with Adam West. Howard said that he likes that they took the comic books seriously and that's what he always waited for. He said it's great that they do that with these comic book movies like Batman, The Hulk, Iron Man and others. Chris said that he didn't see Iron Man but he did like Spider-Man, The Incredible Hulk and some others.
Howard was bragging about how he won the Blockbuster award for his movie. Chris asked Howard who played him in the movie. Howard told him that he played himself. He told Chris to go back and watch the movie because it was fantastic and maybe one of the best movies ever made.
Howard said that making his movie was the best experience ever. He said that they treated him like a king during the shoot. Howard said that the movie made $80 million after all of the DVD sales and all of that. Chris said that he has to go out and rent that movie from Blockbuster. Howard and Robin told him that he might not have one around because they've been losing some of their stores.
Gary told Howard who he beat out in the Blockbuster Awards category he was in and neither of the names he mentioned were recognizable to anyone.
Howard said that Chris is going to be on Letterman tomorrow night. Chris said that he's going to be the second guest on that show and he won't be like Howard as the first guest. Chris said he thought Howard and Dave were close. Howard said they send notes to each other once in a while. Howard said that he really doesn't go on the show that much and he has nothing to say when he goes on.
Gary said that Chris is going to be on Letterman after the Jonas Brothers. Chris said that he should bring his kids along with him if that's the case. He said he didn't know that.
Howard had Vinnie Favale on the phone. Vinnie said that they're looking forward to having Chris on the show. Vinnie said that the Jonas Brothers are on before Chris because they're like the new Beatles. Howard said ''How dare you Vinnie...'' when he heard them being compared to the Beatles. Even Vinnie seemed to realize that he'd made a big mistake by saying that. Howard gave Chris some plugs and wrapped up with him a short time later.
Howard said he saw Sal talking to Mel Karmazin out in the hall. Howard said he thinks that Sal was giving him advice on what to do with the company. Sal said that Mel actually stopped him and he kept his mouth shut. Sal said that Mel went off on him about this lawyer guy who is calling in and how they never put out a press release and his friend is causing problems. Howard told Sal to get out of there so he could get to his guests.
Howard said that they had Bob Kraft, the owner of the New England Patriots, in there. Howard asked Bob how he avoided this Bernie Madoff guy. Bob said that he was advised not to deal with the guy. He said that a lot of people lost their life savings with that guy.
Howard said that Bob seems very powerful when he sees him. Howard said that he must have had some people killed in his life. Robin said that he must be like Jay-Z. Bob said that they can't talk about those things. He said that whatever they do they try to do stylistically.
Howard asked Bob if the economy is hurting him. Bob said that he has a great wife and four kids. He said that he'll just say that it doesn't matter how anyone is doing. He said the show doesn't matter and it matters how things are going with the people around that show. He said that it's not a good thing the way things are going in this country. He said that there's a credit freeze in this country and the companies out there are going to have to lay people off.
Bob said that they have to bring back the confidence to this country. Howard asked if he thinks that Obama can do that. Bob said that he's rooting for him to do that but he's not sure.
Howard asked Bob what's going on with this Tom Brady and him being holed up with Giselle Bundchen. Bob said that he's met Giselle and she's a lovely woman. Bob said that it's hard to make a judgment on what's right for someone else. He said that Tom knows what's right for him and he's proud to have him with the New England Patriots.
Howard asked what's wrong with Tom Brady. Bob said that he doesn't think that there's anything wrong with him right now. He had a torn ACL and he got that fixed and he's rehabilitating from that.
Howard said that if Tom doesn't perform then he's going to have to kick him out the door. Bob said that they're going to keep him no matter what. Bob compared the team to Howard's show because they've both assembled a great team.
Howard asked Bob what it was like to have Gary and Artie at his house. Howard said he doesn't even let Artie into his house. Bob said that his son is a big fan and they tried to do something big for him by having Gary and Artie there. He said that he was upset at first but he liked it after things worked out just fine.
Howard said that he'd be afraid that they'd do something to screw up. Bob said that they were perfect gentlemen and everything worked out just fine.
Howard asked Bob about the family and if they all work together. Bob said that family is very important and he's glad that they all get to work with him. Bob said that having the kids working with him is a great thing and he's very happy that he gets to wake up every day and see them. Bob said that he hopes that's the way things are the rest of his life.
Bob said that he thinks that while this economy is down people are going to turn to the Howard Stern Show, football and other things like that so they have something they can trust in.
Robin said that it's getting very expensive to go to a football game these days and the real fans are sitting at home. Bob said that Robin had a good point there. He said that they built their stadium privately and tried to keep things affordable. He said that he thinks that they've been able to accomplish that. He said that they have people who get on a waiting list to pay $125 a ticket to come to their games.
Howard asked Bob what he does with his money in an economy like this. Bob said that is a good question and he's basically in treasuries right now and taking zero return. He said that the whole system is recalibrating and values are coming down. He said he doesn't like being in that position but they're trying to create new jobs to help the economy out.
Bob said that when someone's home is foreclosed on then it causes problems for the whole neighborhood. He said that they have to get the credit freeze lifted and get things going again.
Robin asked Bob what he thinks is going on with this bankruptcy thing. Bob said that he bought some stock in the company a few months ago because he believes in Mel and he thinks that the company will be successful. Bob said that he only listens to satellite radio when he listens to radio now. Howard said he agrees with him on that.
Bob said that it's very hard to get credit right now and that's why this is happening. He said that SIRIUS has a positive cash flow and they still can't get credit. Bob said that this country is still the best country in the world.
Howard thanked Bob for coming in and said that he was honored to have him on the show. Bob said he felt the same way. Howard said he was going to friend Bob on Facebook too. They had to go to break a short time later.
Howard had this woman Emma Sophina come in next. She was on flight 1549 and survived the crash. Howard noticed her accent which turned out to be Australian.
Emma told Howard that she was on vacation and she's a singer back home in Perth, Australia. She said that she's not that famous back home, she just does corporate functions and stuff like that. Howard asked her if she was heading back home. She said that she was going across the country and she was on her way to visit some friends when the plane went down.
Howard asked Emma what she does when she comes here to visit. She said that she just needed some down time and actually wrote a song the day before the plane went down. Howard found out that she's single and asked her when she last had one. Emma said that she tried to have one before she came to the States and things just didn't work out.
Howard said that the guys there were talking about how good looking Emma was. Howard asked if she goes out to bars and stuff. She said that she doesn't really do that on her own. She said that she's really into the music scene and went out and saw some performances. She said that she ended up sitting with a bunch of Japanese men at the place she went to. Howard asked Emma if she's ever done any lesbian stuff. She said that she's strictly with men.
Howard asked Emma when she had a serious boyfriend last. She said it was about 3 years ago. She didn't want to talk about the sex stuff with him so Howard moved on.
Howard asked Emma if she's ever been afraid of flying. She said that she doesn't like heights but she doesn't mind the flying too much. She said she's done a lot of flying. She said that the take off was perfectly normal and she was ignoring the flight attendants as usual.
Emma said that they had a startling pop happen as they were going up and it wasn't a good thing. She said that she could smell smoke but everyone remained calm for the most part. She said that some people were praying and some were hyperventilating.
Emma said that they could hear the engines dying and they weren't going up that much anymore. Howard said that the pop must have been the birds going into the engines. Emma said they didn't know that at the time but that's apparently what happened.
Howard asked Emma if Captain Sully got on and told them what was going on. Emma said that they could smell it, hear it and feel it. Sully didn't say anything except ''brace for impact'' about 15 seconds before they went into the river.
Emma said that one of the flight attendants had gotten out of her seat as they were landing. That was very dangerous. Emma said that she knew that they were going down and they could be finished. Howard asked if Sully asked for the hot Australian chick to come up to the front. She said that Sully was so focused on getting the plane down that he didn't say anything and he didn't ask her to come up to the cockpit as Howard was suggesting.
Howard asked Emma if she thought she was going to die. Emma said that she was surprisingly calm and she figured that she was just going to be going to heaven now. She said that everyone was calm on that flight and no one was really freaking out. Howard said that he would have been screaming if that was going on with him. Fred played Benjy's screaming at Comic-Con as Howard's scream.
Emma said that she didn't have a phone to call anyone so she didn't get to do that as they were going down. She said that she figured that if it was her time to go then she was just going to accept it and she had accomplished everything that she wanted to.
Howard said that it's the way you die that matters, not the fact that you're dead. Emma said that she doesn't want to feel the pain so she did think about drowning or burning in a fire. Emma said that she joked that she didn't know there was a river there at all.
Howard asked if Emma saw water coming in. Emma said that she thought that they had hit a building because of the impact. She said that someone yelled out that they were in the water so she was kind of relieved. Emma said that there were some flight attendants who were giving instructions as they were getting out.
Emma talked about how they told them to brace for impact. She said that she's very small and she grabbed the back of the chair in front of her. She said that she was able to avoid hurting herself too much by getting her body in the right position.
Emma said that the door on the left hand side was the first one opened and the guy must have opened it as soon as they hit the water. She said that the guy who opened it did it immediately.
Emma said that the impact was so hard that she really felt like they had hit a building. She said she had hoped that it wasn't that bad for the people who lost their lives in 9/11.
Emma said that she met Sully last night on Larry King. Howard asked if Larry hit on her. She said he didn't and he must have been focused on what he was doing. Howard said he finds that hard to believe. Emma said that he was very serious and so was Sully.
Emma said that the toughest thing was getting a life jacket out of a chair. She said that it was an afterthought and someone said something and she tried to get them on and they were very hard to get out and some of them didn't work.
Howard asked if there was one person who jumped in the water and tried to swim to shore. Howard said he thought that she had died. Emma said that there was one person who tried to swim but she didn't die. There were no deaths.
Emma said that she had a lot of stuff on the plane and actually asked if she could go back in and get it. She said that they thought she was nuts.
Howard asked Emma about this song she wrote about this experience. She said that she actually got a record deal out of this. Emma said that it was kind of a blessing in disguise. She said that she was back in the country just four days after she had left so things got kind of crazy. She hadn't planned on coming back for a couple of years.
Emma said that there were a lot of people praying on the plane and that inspired some of what she wrote. She said that there were people who were praying even after they had gone down. Howard asked if his name ever came up during the prayers. Emma said that Howard's name was the first one that came up in her mind. She was just kidding.
Howard played some of Emma's new song ''Send Another Prayer'' that she wrote about this experience. Howard told her that she's got a great voice and she was quite a package. Howard told her to avoid Chris Brown.
Howard said that he'd like to dress her for the music video that she's going to be making. Howard asked her how she got this recorded so fast. Emma said that the fact that Sully took so long to come out actually helped her out getting it done. She said that she wanted to write a hopeful song and this plane crash really inspired her. She said that not too many people survive a plane crash.
Howard asked Emma if she had an Epiphany to go out and try and save the world or anything. Emma said she didn't have that and she's still the same person she was before. Howard asked her if she'd do Playboy. She said that she won't do that, she has no desire to do it.
Ralph called in and said that she'll be doing that when no one is interested in her music anymore. Ralph was also telling Robin that he was upset with Robin for saying that this guy wasn't a hero. Howard said that Robin was just saying that he was just doing his job. Howard said that it was a great job though. Ralph said that no one has ever done anything like this before and Robin was wrong about it. Robin said that other pilots have done this before. That led to Fred and Robin arguing with each other on that.
Robin said that this would be like someone jumping into icy water to save another. Emma said that the fact that he did this was amazing and he's an exceptional pilot for being able to do that. Robin was still arguing with them about that and saying that he wasn't a hero, he was just a good pilot who was saving his own life by doing his job. Emma said that even Sully has said that he's not a hero and he was just doing his job. Robin said she agrees with him.
Ralph said that if the plane had crashed and they had died then they'd be hearing about this for months. Robin said that the story is great but that doesn't mean that he's a hero. Ralph said that he is a hero and Robin sounds stupid talking like that. Emma said that Sully is a hero to her. Robin said that he had no choice in the matter, he was on the plane too.
Howard said that Emma's song ''Send Another Prayer'' is available on amazon.com and iTunes now. He said that he's glad that she survived. Robin asked if she even got wet. Emma said that she was wet from the waist down. She said that she was wearing black jeans and a red jacket at the time.
Emma said that she had to strip off her wet clothes so they all took their clothes off at the restaurant that they were brought to. Howard asked if she was wearing a thong or grandma panties. Emma said that was none of their business. She said she's a private girl.
Emma said that everyone was changing in front of each other but they didn't care at that time. She said that she kept her jacket on as she was doing that because she's a lady.
Howard asked Emma if she has nightmares. She said that she did for a while. She said that she has falling nightmares. Howard asked her if she thinks that she can sue anyone. Emma said that she has looked into it and they may be getting some kind of compensation of some sort. She said that she also had some back pain and things like that going on after the crash.
Howard said that he'd be on crutches if he was on that flight. Howard told Emma that she was very lovely and if she ever wants to talk about what kind of panties she was wearing, she can come back. Howard asked Emma if she was wearing a bra that day. She said that of course she was. Emma kept saying that she's a lady. Gary told her that Howard was being extra nice to her. Howard said he could have asked her if she shaves and stuff like that. They had to go to break after that.
Howard said that they have 6 more coming out and Sam Simon wants to direct and write an episode. They're working on 6 more episodes already.
Howard said that he had a bunch of new songs about Robin and they'll be playing some of those this week. He had a new one from Mike Morse about her boobs to the tune of Coldplay's ''Viva La Vida.'' Howard said that he heard Mike is suing Coldplay for stealing his song.
Howard played the song he played the other day when Robin was late to come back from the bathroom. Howard said that was a great one. Robin got a laugh out of that one. That was ''Robin's News Blues.'' Howard played a few others that they got but just short clips of each one.
Howard had Steve Langford come in with his news preview. Steve said that they have a story about an exhibit about people who grew up on Long Island but Howard is absent from it. Steve said the curator said he wasn't trying to snub Howard, there just wasn't enough room. They have all of the big names except for Howard's though.
Steve said that Lisa G is listed as ''playing himself'' in the credits of ''Show in the Hallway.'' Steve also said that Gary Garver has his Howard Stern watch back up for sale on eBay this week.
Jon Hein came in with his Wrap Up Show preview. Jon ran through the subjects they were going to go over today. That led to Robin getting all upset about them claiming that she kept calling Chris Russo ''Mike'' multiple times. Robin insisted it was just once but Gary said it was at least twice.
There was also some discussion about Artie being out and Jon not being able to say that he thinks that he's out because of drugs. Howard also said he heard that Chris Russo was Jon Hein's camp counselor. Jon said that is true. Jon said that Chris actually remembered it and came over and talked to him about it one day.
Howard asked if anyone is afraid of losing their job with this bankruptcy thing going on. Jon said that there are a lot of people who are afraid. He said that he's nervous but he figures that they don't know anything because they just want them to continue doing their jobs while this is going on.
Robin stared her news off with a story about Salma Hayek being over in Africa and breast feeding a baby after the mother wasn't able to do it. Howard said that is vile. Howard said that's what Miley Cyrus needs to do with Asian children to make up for doing the slanty eye thing that she did recently. Howard said that Dog the Bounty Hunter needs to do something like that too.
Ralph called in and said that there was video of that Salma Hayek thing. He said that it was the greatest things ever. Ralph said that they didn't really show nip but you could see the outline of the boob. He said it was on Nightline last week. Howard said it must be online now and he'll have to look it up. The Howard TV guys had it a few seconds later. The guys watched that for a short time before Robin moved on.
Robin read about this Michael Phelps thing that's going on. She said that they've arrested 8 of the people that were at the party where he was photographed smoking a bong. Robin said that several pro-pot groups have called for a boycott of Kelloggs after they dropped Phelps as a sponsor. Howard said that if he nursed an African baby right now might help him out.
Robin read a story about an ox that was born with a heart shape on it's forehead. The farmer that had it was going to sell it off to a petting zoo or something.
Robin read some stuff about the doctor who did the artificial insemination for the Octomom. Some people are going after him because he was asked not to help her out with more babies but he went through with it and did it anyway. Robin also read about how she spent money on collagen injections on her lips after she got some kind of settlement. She had 6 kids at home and still went out and got the plastic surgery.
Robin read some news about Rihanna and Chris Brown's fight. There were reports about her getting a text message for a booty call and that's what led to the fight. Robin said that there are many stories about this fight and they're all giving different details. Robin said that they also have reports that Jay-Z is saying that this guy Chris Brown is now a walking dead man for doing that to his artist.
Ralph was back on the phone and said that Rihanna and Chris Brown are both just 19. Howard said that's no excuse. Ralph said that they just don't know any better. Ralph said that she probably got all uppity and that's why they ended up fighting. Robin told Ralph he was sounding stupid just like she was sounding stupid earlier.
Howard said they had to go to break but Robin had some Kanye West clips where he talked about this Chris Brown and Rihanna thing on Ryan Seacrest's show. They had to go to break after that.
After the break, around 10:15am, Howard came right back and had Robin get back to her news. Robin read a story about Roberto Alomar and his wife claiming that he had AIDS and didn't tell her about it. Alomar's family is saying that he's healthy and they're going to keep his health private. Gary said the guy isn't even a real Met. Gary said he only played 230 games with the team and he was on there for a year.
Howard read an e-mail about Al Roker's visit to the show and also one about Bob Levy's reading test. The writers liked what they heard with those two.
Robin read a story about a woman who had 72 cats and they're calling her an ''animal Howarder.'' They were trying to get the cats out of the woman's house but she also had dolls that she collected and they weren't able to get them out of the dolls. Robin said that they're going to have to catch them in live traps instead. Robin said they found that the cats were in pretty good shape for the conditions they were found in.
Robin read a story about the Taliban and how they're trying to gain control of Afghanistan again. Robin said that they've tried attacking the capital city over there. Robin read that they killed 19 people when they set off explosions in government buildings.
Robin read a story about 24 year old motocrosser Jeremy Lusk dying in an accident over the weekend. He was doing something down in South America and he hit his head into the dirt on the landing ramp and died. Howard that stuff is just insane and such a waste. He compared that to Christopher Reeve and his horse jumping. Howard said that if he wants to jump he just jumps up and down. Howard said you have to be desperate to race bikes like that. Howard said that you can't be flipping motorcycles like that. It finally caught up to the guy.
Robin read that Abraham Lincoln would be 200 years old this next birthday. Howard said that he'd probably be senile now. Howard said that he saw a real photograph of that guy and he's really odd looking. Howard said the guy looks kind of like him.
Robin said that there was a tornado in a small town in Oklahoma yesterday and 15 people are dead. Howard said that he will never move to a place where they have tornados like that. He said he won't move to Florida either with the hurricanes down there. Howard said that if there's a tornado where he lives, it will find him.
Robin read a story about Charles Darwin and that led to Howard talking about how ridiculous it is that people don't believe that we evolved from monkeys. Howard said that if he had lived in those days, he would have invented the theory of evolution himself. All he'd need is one look at Gary. He said that it would have been Howardism instead of Darwinism.
Robin read some news about Stockton, California being voted the most miserable city in the country by Forbes Magazine. Robin said that Memphis, Chicago, Cleveland and Modesto are the other top 5 cities that are the most miserable to live in right now.
Robin read about the case that Dominic Barbara was involved with where this doctor wanted his kidney back. Robin said that the doctor is being accused of abuse by another woman. She had some audio clips of that woman talking about her accusations.
Robin read a story about Carrie Underwood talking about Valentine's day. Howard said that she's all full of herself and she was just on American Idol. That's not that big of a deal and she's not Aretha Franklin or anything like that.
Howard said that he has something planned for Beth this weekend but he can't top the ring he got her for their engagement. Howard said that it's just too much pressure to do stuff. He said that he did get her something though. He said if he keeps upping himself, he's going to have to buy her New Jersey.
Robin read a story about Jennifer Aniston getting a song for her 40th birthday from John Mayer. Howard said that's lame and cheap. Howard said he's going to do a radio show for Beth if that's how easy it is.
Robin read a story about the new ''Terminator: Salvation'' movie and how they may have Tom York from Radiohead doing some music for the movie. Howard didn't get why that was a big deal. Robin had him play some of Radiohead's music but Howard didn't seem too impressed. Robin ended her news and Howard ended the show around 10:35am.
The guys also talked about Robin calling Chris ''Mike'' a couple of times. Gary said that has happened to him before and you just get something in your head and forget.
Jon and Gary talked about how Artie had called in sick this morning. Gary said that Jason told him in his office after closing the door. Gary said he actually told Howard before the show that he wasn't going to be in and he doesn't usually do that.
Gary said he thinks that Artie called Jason because he figured he was going to be up and he didn't want to leave a message with him since he might not be available.
Gary said that he thought it was great when Artie called him off the air to talk about what had gone on during the Wrap Up Show and asked him ''You're not taping this, are you?''
A caller said that it sounded like Howard was upset with Artie for not showing up today. He said he thought that Howard had said that Artie apparently doesn't care about the show or something like that. Benjy said he kind of got that feeling too. The caller asked why Artie can't call in from an ISDN line instead. Gary said that just wouldn't work. Jason said that they'd probably never see Artie again if they let him do that just once.
Gary said that he can imagine Artie laying back in bed with a cigar in his mouth and doing the show that way every day.
Jon asked Jason about not recording Artie this morning. Jason said that he really doesn't have a way to do that. He said that he told Artie he wasn't recording the call just so he'd know. He said that they have to be careful who they're talking to around there because they do record just about everything.
Gary said that Stuttering John would tape stuff all the time and leave microphones all over the place to catch stuff. He'd usually warn you if he was going to put it on the air though.
Jon took a call from a guy who asked about Chris Russo and the break up that he and Mike had on his show. The caller said that he thought that fighting over a coach was kind of lame. That led to the guys spending a couple of minutes talking about that show and how Chris and Mike didn't seem to like each other when you'd see them on TV together.
Gary said that it would be crazy if Robin and Howard stopped talking to each other for 5 months like Chris and Mike did. Jason thought that kind of happened at WNBC for a while. Gary said that he didn't remember it that way.
The caller said that he never remembers Robin not talking to Howard for 5 months. Jon and Jason were saying that it was in Robin's book that she stopped talking to him. Gary said he was there and he doesn't remember it that way and if she wasn't talking to him, no one noticed. Jon asked Jim McClure to see if Robin was still there so they could ask her about it.
Another caller asked Gary if he thinks that Artie is disrespecting the show. Gary said he already said what he had to say and he's not going to talk anymore about it. The caller also asked if Gary really likes Robert Kraft. Gary said he really does like the guy and he's a great owner. He said he's said that he'd like it if he owned the Jets.
Ralph called in and said that he was feeling very chatty today. Gary said that he was up early and very alert. Ralph went on to ask Gary what he had said about Artie. Gary said that he said on the show, last week, that he thought Artie was disrespecting the show but he's not going to do that while Artie isn't there today.
Ralph asked Gary if it bothers him that Artie can just do whatever the fuck he wants and just not come in. Gary said that's what he said last week and that's what led to Artie saying what he said about Howard being the one who makes the decision. Gary said that Howard is the one who makes that decision on whether or not to put a stop to it and there's nothing he can do about that.
Ralph said that everyone else does their job and Artie is just doing whatever he wants to do and it's bullshit. Benjy said that Ralph has a deal with Howard when he's supposed to work or not, Artie also has that deal. Gary said that he doesn't really have that deal, he's supposed to be there when the show is on. That deal isn't what Benjy is saying it is. Artie is allowed to take time off but he's supposed to be there if he can be there.
Ralph said that Gary is clearly more important to the show than Artie is but it's got to bother him that Artie isn't showing up. Ralph said that Artie is coming up with these loser, drug addict, lying excuses and it's pissing him off just listening.
Gary said that he's not pissed off today. He said that he's being honest about that and he's really not that upset. Gary said that he already got it off his chest and he's not pissed off today.
Benjy asked Ralph if he thinks that Artie is really out enjoying this day. Gary said that's a ridiculous premise for an argument. Benjy said that Artie doesn't seem to be doing this to get away with something, there's probably something really wrong with him. Ralph said that it's getting annoying and Artie is being very selfish.
Ralph said that Artie could get help if he really wanted it and it's disgusting that he's not doing that. Jon told Ralph that he had to move on and talk about something else. Ralph said that he was done for the day then. Jon and Gary didn't believe that.
Gary said that 90 percent is a big number but he does hear the guys talking about Artie being wrong. The caller said that he's completely wrong and he insists on it and then Robin gets in on it and she thinks she's right. He pointed out that she called Chris ''Mike'' today and that was just so wrong. Jon said they already called her out on that.
Robin showed up a short time later so she said that she understood that she had to correct something that she said. Gary asked her about the claims that Jason was making about her not speaking to Howard for a long time. Robin said that it was actually in Washington DC so Gary wasn't there. Robin said that she wasn't sure of the time that it went on but she wasn't talking to Howard and he definitely knew about it.
Gary forgot about what she was upset about. Robin said that Howard had gotten this offer from NBC and everyone was supposed to go and then they found out that they weren't going to be brought up there with Howard. They were trying to separate them at the time so they didn't bring her. Robin said that it was her own psychological problem that led to that whole thing.
Robin said that when they were on the air they were fine, when they were off the air they didn't speak at all. Robin told them to go read the book to find out all of the details. She said that it was her problem and she was so angry about being duped that she took it out on Howard.
Robin said she had to punish someone and instead of punishing herself, she punished Howard. Gary asked Robin why she didn't try to deal with him and bring it out. Robin said that one day she just snapped and made Howard the demon in the whole thing.
Jason asked Robin if she was shocked that Howard kept her on. Robin said that it's ridiculous that Howard took her back after that. Robin said that they were separated for about 6 months or so between Washington and New York. Robin said she was working in Baltimore for that time. Robin said she actually asked Howard why he took her back when she was researching some stuff for the book and he said that he knew that she could get better.
Robin said that she had written a letter to Howard where she wrote all over the paper on the sides and up the top and everywhere else. She said that Howard reminded her about the letter
Robin said that she remembered that letter where she had cursed a lot and put words together that don't even belong together. She said that Howard destroyed the letter so no one would ever see it again.
Jon asked Robin how tough it is to hold that stuff in when she's angry at them. Robin said that she's never had a problem with Fred but she did that with Jackie for a while. Gary said he remembers that but he didn't have the balls to do what Robin did by not talking to him. Robin said that back then they wouldn't let management know about what was going on because it was so uncomfortable.
Jon asked Robin why she looks at him in such disbelief when he talks about why Artie isn't there. Robin said that Jon has to give up at this point thinking that he's not out because of drugs. Jon said that it could be a lie if it's drug related but he doesn't know that.
Jon took a call from a guy who said that he has a problem with Robin's definition on what a hero is. The caller said that a soldier is just going out there doing his job too. Robin said that he's risking his life for another and that's not what Sully was doing when he landed that plane in the river. Robin said that pilots like Sully are trained to do stuff like that. She said that he did a great job but she's still not saying that he's a hero.
Benjy asked a couple of questions and Robin asked if she had to talk to him. Jon told her that she really doesn't. He said they've been trying to avoid him for weeks.
Another caller asked if they're happy that Artie didn't show up today to work. The guy said that if you have a good paying job you should be happy and Artie isn't taking advantage of that. Gary said that he wants Artie to get better tomorrow and to come to work every day. He doesn't want him to fail.
Robin said that the underlying thing is that Artie is miserable. She said that if he was taking off to go to Great Adventure then she'd be happy for him. She said that's not what he's doing and he's actually miserable.
Robin said that she feels horrible for Artie and she feels depressed that she has to say these things about him.
Gary said that he told Artie that he's a very orderly person and he likes that. He said that Artie represents disorder and that alone drives him crazy. Jon asked the guys if they think they've become desensitized to all of that. He said that it's accepted now and they just let it keep going on. Robin said that she's more surprised when Artie shows up to work and she sees him in there.
Benjy asked Robin another question and Robin said that she didn't like that. Benjy told them that he'd leave if they didn't want him there. Jon told him that they do want him there.
Benjy asked Robin if Howard ever gave her an ultimatum about anything on the show. Robin said that Howard never did that with her, she had to do that on her own and show up to work on time. She ended up grounding herself and Howard was happy that she actually did that. Jon asked her what drove her to that. She said that she hated letting down the people that she works with and she didn't want to disrespect them.
Gary said they kind of have that going on with Robin now. Robin said that she has to run off and get some ice and take bathroom breaks. Gary said that he can get someone to go get ice for her if she really needs it that bad.
Gary told Robin that he's seen an ice maker that's the size of a steamer or a popcorn maker and she might want to get that. Robin liked that idea but the guys figured that would make noise and drive Howard nuts.
Ralph called in again and said he'd prefer it if Benjy left the studio. He also said that Robin going out for a couple of minutes is fine but when Artie doesn't show up to work at all he gets away with it. He said that it's ridiculous for Howard to get upset with Robin for not being there for a couple of minutes.
Ralph said that Robin really upsets her when she talks about this pilot not being a hero. He said that she'll do all of these awful stories and she just brushes this one off like it's nothing. Jason said that Robin has kind of convinced him that she's right. That led to the guys talking about the planes that were crashed on 9/11 and Robin was saying that the people on the plane that crashed in Pennsylvania were heroes and the other two planes were filled with cowards. Then she realized that she should get out of there or she wouldn't be able to walk the streets of New York today. Robin said that she was out of line calling them cowards.
Ralph said that Sully walked that plane back and forth to make sure that everyone was out of there to make sure they didn't lose anyone. He said that he's amazing and a miracle worker and Robin is just brushing that off.
The guys asked Robin if astronauts are heroes. Robin said that they're not. She said that they just sit on a rocket. Robin said that's no different than getting on a motorcycle and doing a flip. She said that they're just risk takers. Gary said that they took risks to do things for this country. Ralph said that Robin was being racist because they were all white guys. Jon let Ralph go after that.
Jon took a call from a guy who agreed with Robin about the people on the planes that hit the World Trade Center were a bunch of pussies. He said that he would have done something if he was on one of those flights. Robin said that they recruit people who are willing to die to do stuff like that and people see them threatening people and stuff like that so they don't know what they're going to do.
Robin said that after 9/11 she went to the airport she was told that if someone asked her to carry something she told the guy that she would kick the fucking shit out of someone if they asked her to do that. The security guy told her that she shouldn't do that. Robin said she told that guy that he'd better come running if he sees her doing that to someone.
Jon wrapped up what they had gone over with Robin and reviewed a few of those things. Then Jon asked Robin about how she's feeling about this place with the bankruptcy thing. Robin said that she was very interested in what Bob Kraft had to say about it and she thinks that he has a great deal of faith in Mel and figuring out what to do. She said that he was a really amazing man. They had to go to break a short time later.
Jon brought up Emma Sophina and asked Gary how she ended up on the show. Gary said that her publicist contacted him and booked her on the show. Gary said that it was a big week for the people that were on that plane.
Jon asked Gary if he thought that Emma was taking advantage of that crash to get her career going. Gary said that she did have a singing career before and he wasn't upset by it. He said that there may have been some other people who were upset by it.
Jon had Teddy play some of the song and Howard's reaction to it. Howard had talked about how cute she was. After the clip Gary said that he thought she took the prospect of dying pretty well. Jon said that in all of the interviews he's seen the people all seemed to have a similar take on the crash.
Gary said that he would have been running up and down the aisles trying to open the doors. He said that maybe it happened so quickly that they didn't even have time to react.
Benjy said that they all talk about the impact that they had when they hit the water. They all said that it wasn't all that bad.
Jon took a call from a guy who said that Robin is out of her mind and he agrees with Ralph about the whole hero thing. The caller thought that Robin had said something about fire fighters too but the guys corrected him on that. Robin said that fire fighters are heroes because they do risk their lives to save others.
The caller asked how that Emma chick looked. Gary said that she was really cute. Benjy said that she was cute but she kind of looked like a bug too. Jon said he didn't get that reference.
Jon said that Emma had a very good singing voice. Gary said that she was a very proper girl and Howard did his best not to offend her.
A caller said that he got a lifetime membership to SIRIUS and he used to listen to music but now he listens to Howard 100 almost the whole day. The guy said that he hopes that Howard isn't serious about leaving in 2 years. He also hopes that the company keeps going. Gary said that he thinks the company will keep going it's the people who work there that have to worry about losing their jobs.
The caller was also talking about the hero thing and said that he thinks that Sully was a hero for what he did. He said the guy stayed calm and did what he had to do to save those people. The guy said he elevated himself to that level and a lot of pilots could have cracked under pressure.
The caller said he hopes that Howard is there until he's Ben Stern's age. He said that he has to say there and not just go home and sit around all day doing nothing but walking his dog and hanging out with Beth. Gary said that he's weighing the job and hanging out with Beth all day things.
Ass Napkin Ed called in and said that Artie disconnected his phone and he doesn't have his new number. Ed said Artie wanted him to have the new number but they won't give it to him. Ed claimed that he only got one phone call from Ed and he didn't answer it because it was so ridiculous. Gary said that Ed was complaining about Artie changing his number and he has nothing to do with that. Ed told Gary that he should pick up when he hears him talking. Gary said that it's not an answering machine, it's voice mail. Ed said that Gary was probably sitting right there listening to him. Benjy asked Ed if he thinks that Sully is a hero. Ed said that he doesn't know anything about that story.
Jon asked Gary about Sal getting cornered by Mel Karmazin. Gary said that Sal once thought that Mel was Les Moonves from CBS. Gary said he asked Sal how he couldn't know that this guy is the head of the company. Jon said that he was talking to Sal after all.
Jon took another call from a guy who didn't think that Emma was taking advantage of this crash thing. He was also asking how Ralph gets through to the show so quick. Gary said he has a special number to call so that's how he gets through so quick.
The caller was saying that they're kind of overusing the ''hero'' thing with people. He said that pilots take their lives into their hands every time they fly.
Jon took a call from a guy who said that it was making him sick with Jason trying to keep his GNO membership. He said that Jason is right behind her with the compliments and sticking up for her when she's not in the room.
The caller said that Howard kind of has a super hero power and he could make Artie go to rehab if he really wanted to. He said that Howard isn't doing it and making him go. He said that if Artie dies because of a drug overdose then Howard might think that he could have saved his life.
Gary said he doesn't think that rehab is the right answer for Artie. He said that you really have to want to go to rehab and that might not be the answer for him right now. Jon said that Robin was talking about how Howard just had her work out her own problems by not making her do anything. Jon said he hopes that moment comes for Artie.
Gary said that there are a lot of people in Artie's life who could try and get him to do that kind of thing and he doesn't think that's the answer.
Sour Shoes called in and asked if Dominic Barbara is upset that this ''Rich the Lawyer'' guy is getting all of the attention about this bankruptcy thing. The guys said that he might not know about that kind of law. Sour Shoes asked if he could do a song for his secret Valentine Steve Langford before he left. Gary told him to go ahead. Sour sang a love song to Steve after that. Jon let him go on for a short time before hanging up on him.
Crazy Alice called in and said that she wanted to talk to that ''monkey'' Robin. She said that Robin is shit from hell and she wanted to let her know that she doesn't know a god damn thing about her. She said that she'd never buy that book that she wrote either. She went off on Robin cursing her out and calling her names for a short time. She was ranting about Robin and cursing her to hell and stuff like that. Alice was still ranting as the music was playing to end the show today. Jon thanked her for the call and said that was a great way to wrap up the show. Gary said that he'd pay to see Alice and Robin box down in Atlantic City. They had to end the show a short time later.
Howard started off the show talking about how many interesting things were going on. He said that Robin and Artie weren't there yet so he was wondering if either of them were going to show up. Robin was in a few seconds later. Howard said he could see some cleavage on her this morning. Robin said that was just chest, not cleavage.
Artie came in a short time later. Howard asked him what happened to him and if he was depressed. Artie said that he guesses he is. Howard asked if that's why he was out. Artie said he didn't feel well mentally and physically.
Artie said that 8 years ago he started there and all of his friends asked him if he was going to be able to do this job. He said that he's not sure he can do this schedule anymore.
Howard said that if he tells him that it's too much for him right now, he'll tell him that he's his friend and if he has to get out of there, he'll understand. Robin asked him why he comes in at all.
Howard said that if Artie can't take it then maybe he should go out on a high note. He told him that he's never looked better than he does now. He was being sarcastic about that.
Artie said that he's made some mistakes this year and he's booked a lot of comedy gigs. Artie said he called his guy and he told him that he's too booked up. He's not getting any vacation for 3 weekends in a row.
Artie said he spoke to his guy and said that he's doing what he's committed to but he's not allowed to call him anymore. Artie said that this guy talks to him about this bullshit and he gets him to do more shows.
Howard asked Artie how serious this is and if he's just falling apart. Artie said that his accountant tells him that if he wants to make 3 million a year he should quit the show and just do stand-up. Artie said he had to tell him that without Howard he's not going to get that kind of money.
Artie said that if it came down to it, he'd quit the stand-up before he'd quit this show. Artie said that he wants to try doing no stand-up at all and just do the Stern Show and see how that goes. He's going to try that out and see how it goes before he quits. He said that if that doesn't work then he might have to leave.
Howard said that Artie is getting run down from going out and doing these gigs every weekend and then trying to do the radio show every day.
Howard said that Artie isn't the most disciplined guy in the world. He has a hard time regulating himself on top of all of that stuff he's doing. Howard said that he's still going to have a hard time with his schedule even if he's not doing the stand-up.
Artie said that he used to do clubs back when he first started out but now he doesn't seem to have that energy that he used to. Robin said that's because he's not taking care of himself. Artie said he thinks he just got run down.
Howard said that instead of going through this on the air he should give him a call off the air and they'll figure out a way that he can live a little bit better. Robin asked if he wants him to try it without the comedy shows. Howard said that Artie doesn't know himself and he's not going to be able to do that. He wants the money and he knows that he's not going to give that up.
Howard said that Artie has comedy shows the next three weeks in a row and after that he'll see how doing just the show goes. He said that Artie needs to adjust his schedule and they'll see if they can make some adjustments.
Artie said he doesn't want to piss people off by taking more time off but he's very run down and he'd rather stop the stand-up and just do the radio show if that's possible.
Artie said that he used to get there 30 minutes early when he started there and one time Richard Jeni came in and filled in for him and showed up 30 minutes late. He said that Howard didn't seem to mind it at the time but he was only part time at the time.
Artie said that he's known as a liar on the show now and he's got problems. Howard told him that he just has to call him off the air and talk to him about this stuff. He said that he'll try to work something out with him.
Howard said that Chris apparently got under Mike Francesa's skin. Howard kept calling him ''Mike Fransesco'' so Artie corrected him not knowing that Howard was just being funny. Howard said that Chris made the accusation that Mike sat there all alone doing his show from a hotel lobby and that apparently pissed Mike off.
Howard said that Mike was sitting under and umbrella at the hotel he was in because the roof was leaking or something. Howard said that he got under his skin talking about that stuff and Mike is saying that his ratings are strong and SIRIUS isn't even competing with him and that the company is going bankrupt.
Howard had some audio from Mike's show and the guy that got him going sounds like a guy who sounds just like Hate Man who calls into their show.
The guy who sounds like Hate Man went off on Mike about the stuff that Chris was talking about. Artie said that was definitely Hate Man. The guy was saying this name was Chris in Floral Park so that might be the closets they've come to knowing who Hate Man is. Howard said that they definitely didn't plant him on that show though. Howard said that they don't even know how to get in touch with Hate Man.
Howard said that Mike may have more listeners than Mad Dog but Mad Dog would bring in more listeners than Mike would if he were still on terrestrial radio. Howard said he has nothing against Mike, he doesn't even know him, and he'd be happy if he were working there with them too.
Artie talked about how he was a huge fan of Mike and Chris and he's been listening to them for years. He said that he thinks that Mike is freaking out about not getting as many guests as Chris had down at the Super Bowl.
Howard played more of Mike's show and he was wondering why Chris was on Howard Stern's show. Mike said that he thinks that they were doing that to show solidarity at SIRIUS now that they're falling apart. Howard said that wasn't the reason.
Howard said that his prediction is that satellite radio is going to be huge and it will continue to be huge. Howard said he's reading that Liberty Media or Echostar will be trying to buy the company. Howard said that terrestrial radio is still going to have all of their problems that they have now. He said that they're losing listeners, advertisers and influence and that will continue. They'd still have to hire Howard Stern back to get going again. Howard said he won't go back to terrestrial radio though. Howard said that he thinks that satellite will be big some day once they get in with someone with big, deep pockets. Howard said that they generate $2 billion a year but they had a lot of start up costs that they're still trying to absorb.
Howard said that he had an article about SIRIUS talking to Liberty Media about taking them over. Howard said he doesn't know where it will end up but he's not concerned about it. Howard said he's not worried about his contract being canceled in a bankruptcy reorganization. Howard said he thinks that the Oprah Winfrey channel will be looked at though. Howard said his show will be there.
Artie said that Oprah's show couldn't have brought in more than 30,000 people. Howard said that this Mike Francesa should be happy that satellite is around because he has options. Howard said that Mad Dog is good on the air, that's why he has him on his show.
Howard played more of Mike's rant after that. Mike was talking about Chris' appearance on the Stern Show and went over some of the stuff that Chris was talking about. Mike said that he and Chris have gotten together a couple of times and they had some fun. Mike said that he and Chris were very friendly down at the Super Bowl and he even asked Chris to open up his show with him.
Robin said that it sounds like Mike heard every moment of the interview. Howard said that it did kind of sound that way. Howard said it was like a rebuttal. Artie said that Mike was trying to be nice about it and he doesn't seem to want to piss anyone off.
Howard said they had that Bar Rafaeli on letterman last night too and she looked hot. Howard said that's Leonardo DiCaprio's girlfriend. Howard said that he doesn't know where he meets these chicks. Howard said that they should hire him to work for Playboy because he sure knows how to pick them.
Howard said that he was watching a Miss Howard TV thing on a web site last night. This girl is one of their Miss Howard TV of the Month chicks and he went on this site and watched her do this dance. He said that it was really hot. Howard said that this girl does a dance and removes her bra and panties. Howard said you can tell she's the greatest lay on earth. Artie said he knew which chick he was talking about and she's on some TV show. Howard said she is and she's thinking about taking down that video. Howard said that she shouldn't take it down though.
Howard said that her name is Briana and the video is free. He said that her body is so rockin'. He said that he has this kind of stuff in his life every day and the Sports Illustrated thing just doesn't cut it anymore. Howard said that this Bar chick is hot but he was hardly inspired by what he was seeing. Howard said that Miss Howard TV masturbating is going to get his attention every time.
Howard said that Bar was on Letterman and she looked amazing. Howard said that she's not all airbrushed on the show and she still looks amazing. Artie said that he saw her magazine pictures and he had to stop and look at them on the cover.
Howard said that they have Eliza Dushku coming in on the show. He said that she's really hot too. They had some edited audio clips of Tracey Millman saying her name with her ''douche'' clip in there. They had a couple of other songs with that douche clip in it as well.
Robin said that Eliza was on Buffy the Vampire Slayer and she was very sexy on that show. She said she always liked watching her. Howard said that Beth has been watching her crush on ''The L Word'' lately. Beth got all flush when she saw a nude scene with the Shane character. Howard said that he asked her if she was a lesbian or something. Beth said that she didn't want to be with her but she does seem to have some kind of crush on her. She finds it very sexy. Howard said that he doesn't know what a girl crush is but Beth has one with this Shane chick. Howard said he's really confused by it.
Howard said that Beth went out to a movie screening last night and it was for that movie that Joaquin Phoenix is in. Howard said that Beth thought that Gwyneth Paltrow was great and she's a big fan. Robin isn't a fan at all and she doesn't get that at all. Howard said he gets jealous of Beth when she gets to go out while he's sitting home watching a 2 hour American Idol.
Howard got back to Joaquin Phoenix and talked about how odd he looked on Letterman. Howard said you really have to see the visual. JD came in and said that this wasn't a shtick for Letterman, he's doing a character for some kind of movie he's working on right now. Howard said that it was very odd.
Howard played a clip of David Letterman talking to Joaquin and asking him about his beard. Joaquin was asking Dave if he felt there was something wrong with the beard. Dave was goofing on him and Joaquin was kind of mumbling and doing something to make the audience laugh at him. Howard said that Joaquin wasn't even looking at Letterman so it was very uncomfortable looking.
Howard said that this might be the greatest appearance ever whether it's real or not. Artie asked if Howard remembered Crispen Glover being on his show and Letterman kicking him off. Howard remembered that. Artie said that's almost what this seems like.
Howard played more of the interview where Dave was talking to Joaquin about getting out of acting and taking some time off. Dave said it seemed like he was taking some time off that night. He told Joaquin that he's a great actor and asked if he's going to act anymore. Joaquin said he doesn't know and didn't really have an answer for him.
Howard said he thought that was a great appearance. Howard said he didn't get to watch it all though. Artie said that he heard that Joaquin has cameras on him and this might be just some character he's doing but it's not clear.
Howard played another clip from the interview where Dave asked Joaquin about working with Isabella Rossalini. Joaquin was giving one word answers and not really talking. Dave was laughing at Joaquin when he wouldn't answer him. Dave kept going with the interview and asked Joaquin more questions about his hip hop career and stuff like that. Joaquin said that he would like to come on and perform a song for him. Dave said that seems unlikely but then told him that he was just joking. Dave said they'd keep him in their rolodex.
Howard said that was some great stuff. Robin said that's why she loves Letterman. Howard played another clip where Dave asked Joaquin a question about his movie and Joaquin didn't have an answer for him. Dave asked him to set up the clip for them and Joaquin said he didn't know what clip it was. Dave tried setting it up for him and goofed on Joaquin by saying that he was going to come to his living room and chew gum. Dave just went to the clip and didn't bother with the set up.
Howard said they played the clip and after that they had a discussion. Howard played that clip and Dave said that he was sorry that Joaquin couldn't be there tonight. He said that they owe Farrah Fawcett an apology after that. Howard said he thought that was pretty interesting. He said that he used to work out with Joaquin and he's not sure if he had a break down or if that's just some kind of shtick he's doing.
Artie said that he saw Joaquin once at a bar out in L.A. and he's never seen someone with that look on their face after drinking so much. He said that the guy looked really out of it at the time. Howard said that this isn't the same guy that he knew at the gym.
Howard said that a lot of girls won't press charges against guys like this. Robin was saying that she'd be a great role model if she did press charges though. Howard said that it would help some girls out if she did that.
Howard said in one article they referred to the slap that Brown gave her as a ''pimp slap'' and they didn't even explain what that means. Howard said that a lot of people don't know what that even means.
Howard said that he was reading about the comments that Jay-Z made about this guy being a walking dead man and he seems to be trying to be really tough. He said that singing is kind of gay to begin with and these guys are trying to be really tough by saying stuff like that.
Howard said that you have to watch your back when someone says something like that though. He said that the guy could end up dead because that's what happened to Biggie and the guy from Run DMC.
Howard read through some e-mail about Artie being out yesterday. Someone wrote in and said that they have to take some rational measures and get Artie off the show. Artie said that he doesn't have a gun to anyone's head there.
Howard said that he's not sure why the listeners are so upset when Artie doesn't show up. Robin said that they tend to worry when he's not there. Artie said that one gay guy called into the Wrap Up Show and said he had dreams of killing him.
Howard read some more feedback about Artie being out and one guy said that they can't control Artie and they have to just release him and let him do it on his own.
Howard read some mail about Mad Dog's appearance on the show. One guy wrote in about how great Howard is as an interviewer even with Mad Dog. There were others who said that they know not to waste their time with Russo's show after hearing that interview.
Howard said that Bob Kraft was on the show too. Artie sounded bummed that he missed that. Howard read some feedback about his interview. Howard said that they had a picture of the two of them up on his site yesterday. Howard read some more mail about that interview and had some good feedback about all of that.
Howard said that his father called to leave him a message yesterday and he had to go through his Wildfire answering service. Howard said that he thought he was talking to a real woman when the answering service picked up. Howard said he called his dad back and his dad was talking about what a fan he was of Bob Kraft and the Patriots since he was on the show. Howard said that his dad heard him on the show so he's going to root for the Patriots now, just because of how much he liked Kraft.
Howard said his dad was also asking him what's going on there with the bankruptcy thing. Howard said that his dad agreed with him about the way things were going to eventually work out for satellite radio.
Artie talked about going up to the Kraft's house and said that the guy walked them around the house himself and he was very proud of his family.
Howard read some feedback about the Australian chick, Emma Sophina, that was on the show yesterday. Howard said that some of the fans liked the way she looked. There were others who thought her song wasn't all that good. Fred thought her voice was very good but the song wasn't.
Howard said that there are a lot of people upset with Robin about talking about Captain Sully not being a hero. He read a few of those e-mails and Robin was still defending her stance on that. One writer asked Howard to walk over and punch Robin in the face when she talks about that the way she does. One guy said that he's never had a problem with Robin before she said that.
Howard read some mail about Ralph and his not agreeing with Robin. There were people saying that he was right and Robin was wrong. There were also some e-mails about Steve Langford.
Howard read that someone saw Beth at the dog show and said she was very nice. There was also someone who saw Fred there at the dog show and Fred never said anything to them about that. The writer said that Fred was a very nice guy and very cool to meet there. Howard said that Fred was out making friends and he didn't even talk about it on the show when they brought it up. They had to go to break a short time later.
Howard said that he used to sit in his bedroom listening to Jimi while looking at his poster on his wall. Howard said he never had posters but he did have one of Jimi. Artie said that he heard that Jimi was a very dark guy and a mess. Fred asked if he stayed home a lot. Artie laughed at that.
Howard had a clip from The Onion web site. He said that this fake newscast got him and he thought it was pretty great. He played the clip of this fake story about Sony's new ''Fuckin Piece Of Shit'' product. Howard and the guys got a few laughs out of that. Howard said that was great and he loved it. Howard asked Gary to get him one of those products if he could.
Howard played another Onion news clip about the NY Giants coach retiring from his family to spend more time with the team. Howard thought that was pretty funny too.
Howard told Lisa that SIRIUS isn't going away. He told her to trust him on that. Howard said that there are two guys fighting to own the god damn thing. He said that they should be golden there. Howard said that 60-70 percent of the audience listens to their show.
Howard told Lisa to go back to masturbating and not think about that. Robin said that was just recently and Lisa wasn't talking about what she did in the past. Lisa said that she never thought about Howard in that way. Lisa said that she doesn't think about Artie that way either.
Howard said that Artie is severely depressed and he can't get out of bed. He self medicates and he won't go to a doctor to get some professional help. Lisa asked what triggered that recently. Howard said that it doesn't matter what's going on if you're depressed.
Howard asked Artie what he found out that's bothering him so much. He asked if Dana is dating now or something. Artie said that was it but then said that wasn't it. Howard said that maybe Dana is hanging out at Fubar.com. Artie didn't know what that was so Howard had to explain to him that it's a virtual bar. Artie wondered if he could do virtual coke there. Howard told him that he could probably do that.
Lisa said that the peanut butter recall has been causing problems and Gary's cupcakes are being affected by the recall. People aren't touching his cupcake since the peanut butter recall. Artie said that it's a really good cupcake too. Howard said that the peanut butter is a specific type of peanut butter but people are staying away from peanut butter completely. Howard said that this has knocked down the entire industry by 25 percent.
Howard said that Will told him that everyone hated those cupcakes but Howard figured it was the peanut butter recall.
Lisa said that Jason's wife Janice has reacted to his comments about not wanting kids. Lisa said that Janice said that they have talked about not having kids so they don't pass on some of their genes. Howard said that some women think that they're not women if they don't have babies and that's all a lie. Howard said that you can have a fantastic, satisfied life without children. Howard said that Jason is right and he doesn't need to have kids. Howard said that his wife probably took a look at Jason's lineage and figured it wasn't necessary to put a kid through that.
Howard said that Jason isn't father material. Artie said that he thinks that he is. Howard said that Jason sits around smoking weed and doing nothing with his life. He said that he's on medication and he's not father material. Howard said that Fred made a good father and he's doing a good job but he's not sure that he's a ''great'' father. Howard said that Gary is a terrific father but Artie would be horrible. Artie said he's already thought that.
Howard said that Jason isn't father material either. Jason said that now he wants to have kids to prove him wrong. Howard said that would be a bad idea. Jason said that he can imagine a kid having the same problems he did and he wouldn't want the kid going through the same stuff.
Howard said that Jason is mentally ill and he could pass that along. Artie said that he thought that he got a stripper pregnant in the past 8 months and he was thinking that he'd kill the kid if she didn't get an abortion. Artie said that it turns out that there's no way it could be his kid though. He said that it was between him and 7 other guys.
Gary said that Artie wanted to be a father this summer. Howard said that Artie goes back and forth on that and he's thinking that he's going to have a kid that's going to turn out to be Derek Jeter. Artie said that he'd like a kid like Gary's son Lucas.
Howard said that if you get a dog that's been trained at 9 months then it's going to be a good dog. If Artie got a kid like Gary's son then he'd probably be a great father.
Jason said that they heard that Lucas is goofing on Gary now. He said that Gary has ''London Calling'' as his cell phone ring and his son plays that song in the house to make Gary go nuts looking for his phone.
Gary said that Eliza Dushku was there and everyone was saying that she's really sexy. Howard said that Joss Whedon must be in love with her.
Howard said that Double A claims that years ago he told him that he could come in there and meet Eliza but he didn't remember doing that. He said that he is there today and he will be coming in dressed in a diaper to meet her.
Howard said that Eliza was hit on by Mickey Rourke when she was only 14 years old. She said that he tried to get her to go out with him that night that she met him in a beauty salon. Howard said it must have been scary having that going on. She said that it wasn't that shocking.
Howard asked Eliza about what age she was when she got sexually active. Eliza didn't say but she talked about her parents getting divorced and also about her father teaching Bobby Brown in high school. She said that her father made him spell out his name and pronounce it the correct way on the chalkboard.
Howard said that it looks like Eliza has dated mostly rich and famous guys. She said that's not true and she's dated chimney sweepers and people like that. Artie asked her if she was dating back in the 1800s or something. She said that he was a bookie with a side job. Artie wondered if she grew up in a Dickens novel or something.
Howard asked Eliza who she gave her virginity too and how old she was. Eliza said that she had a bit of a party past. She doesn't drink or smoke anymore. She's 28 now so Howard figured it must have been pretty intense. Eliza said that she did a movie in Australia when she was 14 and it didn't come out very well. She said that when she was there she was given some Wild Turkey and started smoking some cigarettes. She said that they had to wrangle her in when she got back to the States and she got a little wild.
Eliza said that she was about 17 when she started having sex. Howard figured it was around 15 but she said that was wrong. Howard asked Eliza if she made out with women. She said that she did that when she got to L.A. and some agent guy suggested that she do it. Eliza said that she was with a really sweet guy at the time and he got really upset with her about doing that.
Howard read that Eliza dated Seth McFarlane who created Family Guy. She said that she went out and did Karaoke with Seth. She said that they were singing and made out after the song. She said that he gave her some Jack Daniels that night and she drank for the first time in a long time but she hasn't had a drink since. She's still friends with him.
Eliza said that she was told that no one likes a whore and she learned that from her brothers. She said that one of her brothers told her that guys don't like whores so she's always remembered that. She said that's why she doesn't really date multiple men. She said that it was like a tape in her head that would play whenever she was out with guys.
Howard asked Eliza if Seth got upset with her when she didn't do anything with him. She said that he just left her a message telling her what to see in town.
Eliza said that her brother gave her the best advice that stuck with her for all this time. Howard said that his wife Beth told him that she knows that he doesn't like to perform oral sex because her brother told her that guys just don't like that. Howard said that he likes doing that and her brothers were just trying to protect her. Howard said he doesn't mind doing that if it's the right girl.
Eliza said that her brother almost dropped his kid when he saw her Maxim Magazine pictures and asked her why she did that. Howard asked her about the pictures and found out that she's in black bra and underwear. She said that she's worked really hard on her body so she wanted to show it off. She said that she's 5'5'' tall and weighs about 115 pounds. Howard said that she looks great.
Howard asked about this Joss Whedon guy and said that he must want her. Eliza said that he's married with a couple of kids and she doesn't think that's it at all. Howard said that he's probably beating off to her. Eliza said that his wife is really hot and she really doesn't think that he's into her. Artie said that guys want different things and guys do think about other chicks.
Howard said that he read that Eliza dated Red Sox player Brad Penny. She said that they went out for a couple of years. She said that he was having a bad time at work and she was working long hours so things really weren't working out. Eliza said that he was kind of upset that she had to go back to work. They used to go out hunting and stuff together. She said that she went out bow hunting with Brad and PETA got upset with her after that. She said that she only hunts what she's going to consume.
Howard asked how she broke it off with him. Eliza said that they still talk and things are okay between them. She said that she might freak out when he takes the mound in Fenway because she's a huge Red Sox fan.
Howard said that he read that Eliza said that she's pretty free sexually. Howard said that she must be fun in the bedroom. She said that she only said that she's comfortable with her sexuality.
Eliza talked about her new show ''Dollhouse'' that's starting tomorrow night. Howard said that he's going to watch it because it sounds like an interesting show. Eliza went through the plot of the show and Howard said that she's in some hot outfits too. Howard said that they kept that in mind. Eliza said that they based some of the stories on her own life so the second episode is about her going bow hunting.
Gary said that she's not only the star of the show but also one of the executive producers. Howard said that she must be making some good money then. Eliza said that she convinced Joss to work with her on the show. Howard asked her if she's a millionaire. She said that she's doing well. She said she's been working since she was 10 years old so she's had a long time to make money.
Eliza said that she has to work hard on these things and she loves doing it. She said that she had some side boob shown in one scene she did and people took that and ran with it on the internet. Howard asked if she has natural boobs. She said that she does. Howard asked if she uses those cutlet things in her bra. She said that she doesn't do that. Howard said that he thinks that Eliza has a full B or a C-cup. She said that Howard is very good.
Howard took a call from a guy, Andy, who said that he has an obsession with Eliza. He said that in this movie ''The New Guy'' she puts on a bikini display for this guy and it's an amazing scene. He said it's about 48 minutes into the movie. Howard asked if he masturbates a lot to her. Andy said that he does and his girlfriend was into her too.
Howard said that Eliza must get hit on by a ton of guys in Hollywood. Eliza said that no one likes a whore. She said that when she was doing ''The New Guy'' she met Colin Farrell and they went out on the town and partied. She said that a friend of her's was visiting and Colin showed up to her room with his shirt off and climbed into her bed. She said that she didn't touch the guy though. Eliza said that he's so charming that the hotel concierge let him into her room.
Howard asked if Pauly Shore hit on her at all. She said that she has met him out and about. Howard also read that she was raised as a Mormon. He asked her if she had the magic underwear. She said that her mother had them but she wasn't old enough to wear them. She said that they're ''temple garments.''
Howard asked if she's still Mormon. She said that she has a Mormon Hymn tattooed on her hip. She said that she has 6 tattoos total.
Howard asked Eliza if she plays chess. She said that she does. Andy asked Eliza about going to Beaver Country Day School. Artie asked what was up with him knowing that kind of stuff.
Howard said that one of the interns just updated her Facebook saying that she was willing to go lesbian for Eliza. Eliza said that it was great being there and she thought it was very cool.
Howard said that he heard that Eliza had helped Tobey Maguire get the Spider-Man part by shooting some scenes with him. She said that she did help him out with that and it was more than just a home video that they did. They did a whole set up for Sam Raimy.
Howard asked Eliza what guy really turns her on that she would really like to go out with. Eliza said that she's a George Clooney girl. She really likes him but she's not sure she would actually go there with him. She'd like to stare at him and maybe kiss and cuddle with him. Howard asked if she would pleasure herself to him. She said that Howard will never know that.
Eliza said that she also likes Robert Downey Jr. too. She said that she thinks that she could play a part in that movie and she'd love to be in it. Howard said that maybe they can work something out. They know Jon Favreau. Howard said that he knows Sam Raimy too. He said that he and Sam were going to work on some stuff years ago. He said that he told Sam that he didn't need him and went off to write stuff on his own.
Howard asked Eliza what she would do if George Clooney asked her out. She said that she would go out to dinner and maybe kiss and cuddle or something.
Howard asked Eliza why she wasn't in Spider-Man. Eliza said she thought that Kirsten Dunst did a great job in that part. Howard said that character was a hot model type in the comic books and he thinks that Eliza would have been a better choice.
Howard said he saw Eliza on one of these Punk'd shows where they accused her of shoplifting. Howard asked her if she cried. Eliza said that she was hung over that day and she was late for work and this guy was going in on her that was really sharp and cutting. She said that she was trying to get out of there that day and she freaked out on them but didn't cry. Howard told her that she shouldn't have allowed them to show the video. She said that she has a good sense of humor and she just went along with it after the cameras all showed up. Howard said he would have been furious.
Howard said that Justin Timberlake ended up crying in one of those Punk'd shows. Then he actually let them show it. Howard said he would never do that.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked what kind of panties Eliza was wearing today. She said that it was a thong. She said that she doesn't wear Granny Panties.
Artie said he liked the things she was wearing on her legs. Howard said that she had net stockings on and they did look good. He doesn't usually like them though.
Another caller asked if she had a landing strip or a Brazilian wax. Eliza said that her brothers are listening and they don't want to know that stuff. Howard wanted to know though. Howard said that Beth was thinking about growing some back down there but he prefers it to be shaved completely. Howard said he advised her to keep it that way.
Howard said that he pictures Eliza with a little landing strip. She said that she won't do that with her brothers. She said that would drive her one brother over the edge.
Another caller asked if she's into anal sex. Eliza said that this stuff is over the top, she is Mormon after all. She said ''no'' to that.
Gary told Howard that she had to leave by 8:20 so they had to get Double A in there to meet her. Howard said that she has heard of Double A before. Double A had to dress up as Cupid to come in this morning. Howard said that Double A has gotten really fat lately. He asked him what he's been eating. Double A he's been drinking. He brought in a gold rose from Steven Singer Jewelers for her.
Howard said that Double A claims that he called in and asked to meet her when he was on the phone one time. Double A said that he used to read a list of his top 10 hot chicks and she was always on them. Gary asked Eliza if she's ever dated a guy with a tattoo of Howard Stern on his arm.
Howard asked Eliza about working with Sarah Michelle Gellar and if they're still friends. She said that they don't stay in touch much these days. They just went their separate ways. Howard figured that she was brought in to light a fire under Gellar's ass. She said that she was only supposed to do 3 episodes but ended up doing a lot more than that.
Howard asked Double A if he wanted to ask her any questions. Double A asked her what they were going to be doing tonight. She said that she has a date already and she's not going to be available tonight. Double A said that she didn't say no to him, she just had plans already. Howard asked Double A if he was wearing every bottle of Sean Jean today because he really stinks. Double A said that he just put it on before he came in there.
Howard thanked Double A for coming in. Eliza thanked him too and said it was nice to meet him. Howard said it was nice meeting her too and gave her some more plugs for ''Dollhouse'' which starts tomorrow night on FOX. Howard went to break a short time later.
After the break we heard a prank call that the guys made to a Chinese restaurant using Casey Kasem countdown clips. Fred played some Bruce Springsteen ''Radio Nowhere'' as they were coming back.
Howard came back and said that he had a couple of things to mention. He said that he has this Congressman Gary Ackerman on the show once in a while. He said that Ackerman went and yelled at the SEC for letting this Bernie Madoff get away with ripping people off all these years. Howard said that there are ton of people who lost money and they found out that the SEC just ignored the warnings they got about him.
Howard said that Ackerman was screaming at all of the SEC members and he was so happy to see that. Howard said that usually no one gets called out on the carpet for stuff like that. Howard said that Gary Ackerman finally had the balls to do it. Howard said there was some pleasure in watching these guys squirm.
Howard played some audio of Ackerman going off on the SEC guys. He was asking them what went wrong and why the let this happen with all of the warnings they had.
Howard said that he takes particular joy in this because the SEC investigated him a couple of years ago. He said that he and a couple of friends were investigated and they found that they were doing nothing wrong. Howard said that you start to believe that you did something wrong when you didn't. Howard said that they were busy investigating him instead of investigating Bernie Madoff.
Howard played more of Ackerman going off on the SEC members and saying that they couldn't find their backsides with both hands if the lights were on. Ackerman said that other people are investigating this stuff now that they've failed to do their jobs properly.
Howard said that Ackerman continued to go off on them as they were trying to explain why they didn't find out sooner about this Madoff scam. Ackerman said that they're completely inept at doing their jobs. Howard said that Ackerman kept reaming them even though they were trying to remain calm and trying to cover their asses.
Howard said that Ackerman was pointing out that they were warned multiple times about this guy and they ignored the warnings. Howard played another clip where Ackerman was telling the SEC members that they were worthless to the country. Howard said that this guy is a great guy, Gary Ackerman. Howard said that it was great that he was able to berate them but that's about all he could do.
Andy said that it's horrible that he can't come because of a physical or mental thing. He said that he's tried to do it in the past 6 months and there just wasn't any pleasure in it. He said that even on Sunday he had sex but wasn't able to finish. Howard said that they have Shawna Lenee coming in and she did this Munsters parody for one of her porn movies. He played a clip from another one of her movies where she was moaning as she was getting banged.
Howard said that Jeff the Drunk called Doug Goodstein from Howard TV and started off asking for a particular episode of the show he wanted to see. Then he started to list all of the other stuff he wanted from the guys and it got crazy.
In the voice mail Jeff was asking to see all of the Show In the Hallway episodes, all of the Inside the Porn Actors Studio, the Top 10 of the year, the Artie Lange greatest Hits show, any original programming in the future and the daily shows. He was asking to see all of the interviews with the stars they have on the show. Jeff said that he would get the service if he could but he feels he's out of the loop and wants them to send him everything the possibly can from Howard TV. Howard said that was a tremendous request list.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked about this new ''Watchmen'' movie. Howard said he thinks that it's going to be fantastic. He said he's started to read the comic book and it's looking good to him. He said he thinks that it's going to have some great special effects and stuff. Howard said that he's going to watch Iron Man and Batman again this weekend.
Howard said last weekend he and the dog watched the original ''The Day The Earth Stood Still.'' He talked about that for a short time. Fred and Howard talked about some of the characters in the movie since Fred had watched it recently too.
Another caller said that he liked hearing that audio of Gary Ackerman going off on the SEC. Howard said that it was great to hear that because these government agencies don't usually hear that kind of stuff when the screw up. Howard said he had to take a break before bringing in this Penthouse Pet of the Year (Runner up) Shawna Lenee.
Howard also read about Terrance Howard saying that Chris Brown and Rihanna will move on and everyone just needs to get out of their way. Howard said that he's already apologized for that comment.
Artie said that Double A got him a book and he knows he has nothing but his happiness on his mind. He said that he gave him a book about how to be happy and on page one they say ''win the lottery.''
Howard said that Double A went to some event where he got some stuff signed and framed and it's just too much stuff that he's buying for them.
Howard said that he wanted to get to Shawna Lenee. He said that she's a hot chick and she's also a porn star. Howard asked when Penthouse started putting porn stars on the cover. He said that Shawna is really a very pretty girl and she's not all made up. Shawna said that she's only had breast implants done and didn't have any other surgery.
Howard asked Shawna about how old she is and stuff like that. She's only 21 and she's already done 200 films. She said she started out when she was just 18 years and 5 days old. She said that's almost 4 years of porn.
Howard asked Shawna about her thoughts of suicide. She said that she has a kid and that was part of what that was about. She said that she got a lot of shit for being in the industry with a kid and that kind of did it to her. Howard said that her stomach is as flat as a board even after the kid. She said that she had her baby when she was just 17 years old.
Howard asked Shawna about why her son lives with the father. She said that the baby daddy won't let her bring him to California to live. She said he won't give up custody. She said that it was his idea for her to do porn in the first place. Artie got a laugh out of that. Artie was also goofing on her for sleeping with a Puerto Rican guy. She said that she was young and naive at the time.
Howard asked Shawna if she still has sex with the guy. She said that she doesn't. She said that he has a girlfriend and they're having a baby together too. Artie laughed again when he heard that.
Shawna said that she was living in a small town in Ohio and she grew up on a farm. Shawna said that she fell into the drug thing for a while. She was on meth for about 10 months and her life fell apart. She said that she got hooked after the one time she tried it. She said she wasn't able to stop after that. Shawna said that she probably blew guys to get meth. Artie asked if she would blow him for Meth. She said she might not do that.
Shawna said she just woke up one morning and wondered what she was doing and got off the meth. Howard asked her how she tried to kill herself. She said that she cut her wrists with razor blades. She didn't want to show them to the guys but Howard told her to show him. He said that was a pretty major looking scar.
Howard said it might be good to keep the scars so she can remember. She said that things are going great for her right now and she's very happy. She said that she's not making a lot of money right now though. She said she's making about 1/6th the amount she was making before.
Shawna said that guys download free porn and there shouldn't be free porn out there. Shawna said that her rate is $1,200 right now and the companies can only pay about 8-900. She said that she has to take cheaper rates or not do anything.
Howard said that there really is a lot of free stuff out there and it's gotten crazy. Shawna said that she's lucky to be getting any work at all at this point. Howard asked when she last made a movie. She said that she did one about 2 weeks ago. Howard said that's a long time to take off. Shawna said that she's not doing anything during that time.
Howard asked Shawna if she's considered doing some escorting. She said that she has thought about it but she can't bring herself to go through with it. Howard said that she could probably make more money doing that. Artie said that he'd like to shit on her and she can even have her baby and boyfriend there.
Shawna said that she's had offers of $8,000 and she turned that down. She said that she didn't even know who the guy was offering her that money. Artie said that he'd like to have her over for just a quick fuck and then she can leave. He said that he doesn't want to hear about her life or anything and he'll even wear a bag... over his head. Artie said that she can leave right after he shits on her and he'll pay her $10,000.
Howard said that Shawna is on the cover of Penthouse and she's the Pet of the Year runner up. Howard said that Taya Parker is the Pet of the Year and they'll be making some appearances around the area.
Howard asked about this Swing Party that they're doing this weekend. You can find out more at HedoOnline.com
Howard asked Shawna about her first sexual experience which was with a girl. She said that she lost her virginity to a girl. She said she really loves girls. Howard asked her if she would take a girl over a guy. She said that she would take both.
Howard asked if she lives with Nick Manning the porn star. Shawna said that she does live at his house but she doesn't really bring people home with her. She said that she loves to stay at home and read and watch TV. Artie was laughing his ass off at those comments. Shawna said that she was reading a book called ''Why Men Date Bitches'' which made Artie laugh even harder.
Howard asked Shawna if she likes anal. She said that she has done it only once on film and she has thought about doing it again so she must like it. Howard told Shawna that she's very sexy and hot. He said that he might go to this swing party.
Howard asked about the Swing Party and what will be going on there. Shawna said she'll probably be topless there. She said that she's always running around topless. Howard asked her if she would like to be interviewed naked. She said that she could dance around for him if he wanted. Howard had Fred play some music for her to dance to. Shawna did some dancing for the guys and Howard said that this will be good for Howard TV.
Howard said that Shawna has some rack on her. Artie said they were very classy and subtle. Shawna danced a little bit and then Gary asked her why her pants were on. Howard said that she was doing a great job dancing and she was very hot. Fred had to play a second song because the first song ran out. Howard told Robin to come out and do some dancing for them. Robin wasn't interested. Artie said that he was going to show up to work on time from now on. This is why he loves that job.
Howard asked Shawna to describe to them what she has done to guys and girls when she's brought them home. She said that she would bring girls home from strip clubs and stuff. She said that she has a couple of favorite spots that she dances at. Shawna said that she brought one girl home from the club for her boyfriend. Shawna said that she tells the girls what she's going to do. She said that she loves to eat the girls out and finger them. She also likes to let the guy she's with fuck her.
Howard asked if they get right into it when she gets home. She said that's what happens. Shawna said that the guy can stand in the corner and watch and jack off if he wants to. She said that she'll have the guy fuck her and the guys usually come really fast so they don't get to fuck the other chick.
Shawna said that she has a really tight pussy and she can squeeze her kegal to make a guy come really fast. Howard asked if the girls get her off. Shawna said that she'd rather eat a girl out than have another girl eat her out. Howard asked her if she likes playing with a penis or a vagina better. She said that she's about 50/50 on that. Howard said that he likes this girl and that she loves doing this stuff.
Shawna said that she loves having a guy doing her doggy style while she's eating out a girl. She said that she would be on all fours while the guy is doing her. She was saying that she wishes that she had a cock so she could feel what it's like in her pussy. Artie said that he'd like to take that for a test ride because he's a word smith and he'd love to describe what it's like.
Gary said that this girl is screaming to be on the Sybian. She said that she loves the Sybian. Howard said that they have a clean attachment for her and had her go right over to the thing. Howard said that she should have won the Pet of the Year thing. Howard said that they actually met the winner and said that she doesn't compare to Shawna.
Howard had Shawna get on the Sybian and told her to do it for real and not fake it. Howard figured that she needed the full 100 percent power. Shawna said that she might just need that. Gary started her out at 50 percent but she asked him to turn it up within seconds. She said that she was tingling already and she was only on it for a short time. Shawna described what she was feeling and said that it was making her shake really bad.
Howard had Gary turn it up to 80 percent and then up to 100 percent. Shawna was saying that it felt so fucking good. She said that she was sliding her clit up and down on it and saying ''Omigod, omigod'' over and over. She said she was going to come and let out a few screams after that. Shawna told Gary that she was done so Howard had him turn it down.
Howard asked her to get up and Gary told her to be very careful. Howard asked if her panties were a mess. She said that they were. Gary said that her boobs are so big that they were rattling and shaking as she was riding that thing.
Howard asked Robin if she was jealous. She said she wasn't. Robin asked why so many people come in there and have nothing happen. Shawna said that it was all about the guys and without them she wouldn't have been able to do that.
Howard asked Shawna if she gets hornier when she does that. She said that she would like to have something in her pussy right now. Artie let her know that he and Benjy are single.
Howard gave Shawna some more plugs for her March 2009 issue of Penthouse and then wrapped up with her and went to break.
After the break we heard another Jack and Rod Show bit where they were interviewing an author and had Riley Martin audio clips talking to her. Fred played some Bruce Hornsby ''The Way It Is'' as they were coming back.
Howard came back and said that was a cool song and then belched. Robin said she was enjoying it until that.
Howard took a call from a guy who said that Riley Martin prank call is great and it's the funniest fuckin' phone call. The guy said that he thinks he's going to get fired for listening to that Shawna Lenee segment. Howard said he thinks that's going to be a great Howard TV episode. Howard said that Gary was staring at her ass while she was getting dressed and that's why Robin was laughing so hard at him during the break.
Howard said that Shawna was a great interview because she was so open. Gary said that she didn't have any filters and just said what was on her mind about fingering and eating chicks out and stuff.
Howard said that Robin claims that she used to be like that but he doesn't believe that now. Artie said that they shouldn't even bother educating women in this country. They should all be like that chick.
Howard had Mike Walker on the phone so he went to him to play his game. Howard got right into the game so here's how it goes... Each week Mike Walker calls in with four gossip stories. Three of the stories are from his National Enquirer gossip column. One of the stories is false. Everyone tries to pick out the false story. The stories will appear in Mike's gossip column each week after he plays with Howard. Here are this week's stories:
Mike told Howard that he had a story to tell them since next week they won't be in. Mike said that the magazine Celebrity Sleuth has launched a web site (CelebritySleuth.com). He said that they're going to have pictures of many never before seen stars nude from the past 23 years of the magazine. He said that it will be people that have never been seen nude before. He mentioned some names of some old stars who have never been seen nude.
Mike said that they're going to have the first pictures of Marie Osmond when she was in her 20s up on that site. Howard thanked Mike for the game and let him go a short time later. Artie goofed on Mike about that story for a few minutes after that.
Howard said that all great shows invite guest writers to help out. Fred thought it was a joke. Howard asked Sal why he's feeling this way. Sal said that he doesn't like working with certain people so he didn't want to work with Sam. Howard said he won't make him work with him, they'll just give Sam the job. Sal said that Sam surrounds himself with people who are more talented than him and puts his name on that stuff.
Gary came in and said that he heard a story about Sam complimenting Sal on his comedy and Sal asked him if he was trying to steal him from the show or something. Sal said he likes Sam and it didn't go down that way.
Sal said that he doesn't like working with Sam because he has a certain arrogance and he's pompous. Sal was trying to tell a story but Howard cut him off and said he was bored with him. He said that Sal had said enough.
Sal said that Sam told him that he had the worst idea ever when he wanted to bring Boris Karloff back to modern day monster movies. Sal said that his idea was to bring back the Boris Karloff ting to modern day monster movies. He said that he wanted to have a character who would bring the actual Boris Karloff back to life to do the Frankenstein thing. Howard told Sal that he had to go. He cut Sal off in the middle of that story. Howard didn't think that it was a good idea. Sal said that it's a great idea and he's trying to recreate something that's not being done.
Steve got back to his news preview. He said that Siobhan is telling them that she thinks that Howard might be gay. Steve also said that Billy West may be prepping Sean Penn to play Larry Fine in a Three Stooges movie. Penn's people are denying that rumor.
Howard had Jon Hein come in with his Wrap Up Show preview. Jon ran through his list of subjects they'd be covering on today's Wrap Up Show.
Double A called in and told the guys that Eliza called him after the show and he's going out on a date with him tonight. Howard asked him to swear on the life of his mother that he's telling the truth. double A said he couldn't do that. He said that he was going out on a date tonight with her. Double A was lying and he was just calling in to thank Howard for letting him come up there. Robin asked why he would lie about something like that.
Howard had Mutt from Superfan Roundtable on the phone. Mutt said that they may discuss the whole SIRIUS and Echostar situation. Mutt said that he wasn't allowed to talk about it last week. Howard said he's not sure why that's not allowed. Mutt said that he's afraid that he might ruin the whole deal. Mutt said that the fans are worried about the show coming to an end so that's what they'll be talking about tonight. Howard told Mutt to talk about everything that they've been told not to discuss on tonight's show at 7pm on Howard 101.
Robin started her news off with a story about Octomom Nadya Suleman. She said that she's going to be taking money from the taxpayers. Howard said he heard that she got paid a million bucks to do one interview. Howard said that this whole case is fascinating. He said that she has no means of support and she's living at her parent's house. Howard said that she has started a web site and she's asking for donations now. Robin read about that web site and how it's illegal for a single person to start a charity that benefits only them.
Howard played some audio of this Nadya chick talking about how she uses food stamps and she thinks that she'll be able to get off of them once she gets out of school. Artie said that she's a shithead.
Robin said that the medical bills for her 8 kids could approach a million dollars. They haven't calculated all of the bills yet.
Howard told Artie about the video that they were watching yesterday of Salma Hayek breast feeding a stranger's baby over in Africa. Artie had missed that.
Robin read some more about the 8 babies that Nadya had and how they're going to end up being in the hospital for quite some time. She's also getting some support from people who are donating things to her to help out.
Artie asked if they're going to replay the Mike Walker revelation about the Marie Osmond thing. Howard said that all of the other media outlets probably already picked up on that breaking news.
Robin read some news about Rihanna and Chris Brown's fight. She said that people are coming out in support of both sides.
Robin had a story about Jessica Simpson talking about her weight and how she prays every day. Howard said it sounds more like she's eating every day instead of praying.
Robin read a story about Mike Tyson writing a book so that led to Artie doing his impression of Tyson for a short time. They had to go to break after that.
During the break Howard was freaking out on Gary about having him signing pictures to Human Newman and not knowing how to spell his name or having a pen that worked. Fred was worked up about it too and tried talking about it but Howard told him that he was being too chatty and he just wanted to do the commercial and get out of there.
Sam said that they actually called him to be part of the Show in the Hallway thing and he didn't just ask to do it. Sam said that they have to tell Sal to just shut up about the stuff he's been saying on the air about him. Howard asked Sam if he wanted him to fire Sal. Sam said he did so Howard told Sal that he's fired. Sam wondered if that was a joke. Howard said he was serious.
Sal came in and said that he likes Sam and he doesn't know what he said wrong. Artie said that Sal was saying that Sam didn't do anything to get credit on the Simpsons and shows like that. Howard said that Sal is assuming that Sam wasn't doing the work. Sal said that people talk in the industry and that's just what he's heard.
Sam told Howard to fire this guy. Howard said he should. He told Sal that Sam did create the Simpsons and that's why his name is still in the credits.
Sal told Sam that he's not going to be part of his shows and that's it. Howard said he wants Sam involved. Howard also asked him what he thinks about this Boris Karloff idea that Sal had. Sam goofed on Sal about the comments he made about him earlier so Sal snapped on him and called him an asshole.
Howard told Sal not to go on the Wrap Up Show today and make things worse. Sal said he won't be going on. Howard told him he's banned from that show.
Robin read some news about Jay Leno and the Writer's Guild going after him for doing shows during the Writer's Strike. Howard said that Jay has a lot of things wrong with him and that's just one.
Robin read a story about Nicolette Sheridan leaving ''Desperate Housewives'' this season. Howard said that she seems to be a big pain in the ass to work with and that might be why they're kicking her off.
Robin read about A-Rod possibly being suspended. She also had a story about Brett Favre calling reporters and saying that he's retiring. Robin read that a story about Miguel Tahada lying about some of his other teammates using steroids and now he's in trouble for that.
Robin had story about Roberto Alomar and the accusations made about him possibly having AIDS. Artie said that there was a story about him spitting on an umpire one time and they said that the Ump had called him a fag or something but nothing ever came of it. He said that there were rumors that he was gay back then. He said they were just accusations though.
Howard had a former intern, Tara, on the phone who works for Access Hollywood. Tara said that Joaquin was at this movie premiere and they were asked to sing a release before they interviewed him because they were filming him doing this stuff. Howard asked if she thinks that he fell of his rocker or if he's acting. She said that she thinks it's a little bit of both. Tara said that even Gwyneth Paltrow said that there was more to the story than they think.
Howard asked Tara if she still fantasizes about him. She said that she listens to the show every day. Howard thanked her for the call and let her go after that.
Robin read a story about Molly B dying at the age of 69. She also had a story about Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow possibly breaking up.
Robin read that Bar Rafaeli and how she prepared for her photo shoot by eating. Robin was reading a story about something and Artie mentioned something about someone dating a personal trainer. Howard thought he was referring to Dana dating a personal trainer but Artie said he was just being funny and that's not what's going on there.
Robin read a story about this woman who suggests guys sending text messages to their girlfriend's as a Valentine's Day gift. Howard was still on the Dana thing and asked Artie if that's what was going on with him. Artie insisted that he was kidding and then said that he'd talk to him about it off the air. Howard told Artie he really didn't want to talk to him off the air about that stuff.
Howard took a call from a guy who congratulated them on a great week of interviews. He said that the Norm MacDonald interview may have been the best. Gary said they'll be replaying that tomorrow on the Best of the Week.
Robin had some more about the texting stuff and had Howard playing some audio of this woman suggesting to guys what they can text to their girls. Howard said that he was going to text whatever Amy Fisher's husband Lou says. He had Fred play some clips from their porno so he could figure out what to text. Howard pretended to write down some of that stuff.
Robin had some top songs for break ups. She said that these are songs that people can break up to. She played one from Pink, another from Justin Timberlake, Destiny's Child and Kelly Clarkson. Howard said that he listens to a song when he wants to break up but when he went to play it, the song wasn't up on his screen. It eventually showed up on his screen and it was Sal's song about his wife and how he wanted to throw her down a stairwell.
Robin read a story about the merger of Ticketmaster and Live Nation. Artie said that he doesn't want that. There are congressmen coming out and saying that they don't want the merger to go through.
Robin read a story about the economic stimulus package and how that's still being worked on. Robin had a story about the owner of the peanut butter plant where the salmonella outbreak started. He has refused to comment when asked about what was going on there.
Robin said that President Obama is a big fan of Abraham Lincoln and they went to Ford's Theater last night and said a few words. Howard said that they had run into Friday already. He asked her to end her news so they could get out of there.
Robin read a story about a guy pretending to be the drummer from Foreigner who was involved in a car crash. He allegedly stole the car of a woman he met at a hotel. Howard wondered why he would pretend to be the drummer from that band and not the guitarist from the band instead. They had to end the show a short time later, right around 11:05am.
Jon asked Gary if he agrees with her that nobody likes a whore. Gary said that he would tell his sister that but he doesn't believe that himself.
Jon said that she seems to take great pains to prove that she's a regular girl. He had Teddy play a clip of Eliza talking about dating chimney sweepers.
After that clip Gary asked Jon if he has his chimney cleaned. Jon said that he doesn't call them chimney sweeps. Gary said that he gets a card in the mail about that every year and he has one clean his chimney.
Jon said that Eliza was pretty regular until she started talking about George Clooney being her dream date. Gary said that a lot of hot chicks come in there not dressed up but she was dressed very sexy today. Gary said he loved her in that movie ''Bring it On.''
Jon said that every guy who worked there was standing in the hallway to get a look at her. He said that hasn't happened in a long time. Gary said that Benjy was even making noises when she walked into the studio.
Benjy said that she was stunning in person and she's just beautiful. He said that he could see her legs when she was walking out and it was great.
Gary said that there are some guests who don't live up to what you expect but Eliza exceeded those expectations.
Jon asked Gary about Double A visiting and what was going on with that. Gary said that they weren't able to find anything in the logs about Double A mentioning her name in the past so they're not sure about that. That led to the guys talking about Double A's tan and how odd the color was. Gary said that Eliza talked about the tan but she may have just been saying that because it was such a shocking color.
Gary said that Double A tried to give Will a couple hundred bucks to take the interns out but they turned him down. Will said that Double A had a wad of money that was about 2 inches thick that he pulled out of his pocket. Gary said that he gave him some gift cards for Toys R Us and his kids write him notes back about that. They have no idea who he is though.
Jon took a call from a guy who said that Eliza was on Regis and Kelly and she was very sexy on that. He said he predicts that her show will tank just like Christian Slater's show did. The guy said that she looks awful in the clip that he saw and that's not what she looks like in real life. He said that the acting seemed to be very amateurish and primitive as well.
Gary asked him if he got all of that out of a 20 second clip. The guy said that he did because he's an actor himself. The guy said that she was very amateurish in that clip. Gary asked him where they could have seen him. He said that he was in the play ''Action'' on Broadway at the Wintergarden Theater. He said that he was there for a year and a half. Jon said that Will Murray was in ''West Side Story'' for a while too.
Jon said that Eliza is an executive producer on that show too. Gary said that he doesn't even know what that means. Jon explained to him what he knew about that title and how it means more pay for her. Jon said that it also sounds like she was going between her and Joss Whedon. Jon said that it's on after Terminator on Friday nights so people can check it out.
Wheels called in and said he saw that clip on Regis and Kelly and he thinks that it's going to fail just like Slater's show did. Wheels asked Gary if he would go with Eliza or Shawna in bed. Gary said he thinks he'd have to pick Shawna for the bed thing. That led to the guys talking about Gary staring at her ass while she was getting dressed during the break. Gary said that it was fascinating watching her. He said that she was putting on a whole show just getting dressed.
Wheels was saying that they should also leave Sal alone and let him do his show if he wants to do it without Sam Simon. Benjy said that Sal is just putting people in fantasy bits and it's not that exclusive to Sal. He said that would be like making a movie and then claiming that he was the only one allowed to make movies.
Another caller said that he used to do photo editing and he met Eliza one time and wasn't even able to talk to her because she was so beautiful. The guy said that he thinks that Sal is wrong for not wanting to work with Sam. He said that's just a stupid thing to do. The guy said that this could have been a great career move for Sal and he probably blew it. Gary said that's just the way Sal is.
Benjy wondered who went to the news with the whole Sam Simon thing. Gary and Jon talked about how Sal will tell everyone his stories and he'll make it seem that it's a big secret but meanwhile he's told 5 other people about it. Will came in and said that he feels the same way about Sal and that is the way he does things with those stories he tells.
Gary said that Eliza had one thing on her that was a little crazy. She had fake eye lashes on her and they just didn't look right. Gary said that she really didn't need them because she's such an ivory girl-like person.
Jon asked Gary if he was shocked that she was a book reading introvert. Gary said that wasn't surprising to him. Jon also mentioned that she was living with Nick Manning. Will said that guy has the life living with chicks like that.
Will was also talking about how tight her body was. Gary said that Will was also talking about how it's a good thing to have a kid at 17 because your body can bounce back easier.
Jon asked about getting her on the Sybian too. Gary said that she just seemed like she was up for it and someone from Howard TV may have suggested that to him. He mentioned Doug Goodstein's name when he brought that up.
The guys talked about Jason not wanting to have kids. Gary said that it's fine that he doesn't want to have kids but he's also thinking about it in the wrong way. He said that Jason thinks that the kids won't be good at sports but you don't have to make them play. They spent a minute talking about that.
Jon took a call from a guy who asked if they ever use the fact that they can get people up high in the google trends thing to book guests. Gary said that he doesn't go off of that. He said that they usually just take what's available at the time. While he was on that subject Gary said that they are going to have Rosie O'Donnell on the show soon, live in the studio.
The caller said that he thinks that they could use that google trends thing to show celebrities that they can get them a lot of attention if they appear on the show. Gary said that they can use a lot of stuff like that. He said that he wrote down names of a few people he thought would be great guests like Joe Torre, Ron Howard and Rod Blagojevich so he called Torre's people, they never got back to him. He tried Blagojevich's people and they never got back to him. Ron Howard's people did get back to him and they booked him for the show.
Benjy asked if they've tried for Octo-mom. Gary said that she's at the point where she can demand money. Will said that some people don't come on the show because they're afraid of the questions that Howard is going to ask. Gary talked about how great Eliza was on the show and how she seemed to know the show and people's names. He said that the woman who survived the plane crash was a different story because she wasn't familiar with the show. He said they had to handle her differently. They had to go to break a short time later.
After that clip the guys talked about Artie possibly working on a modified schedule. Gary said that they really wouldn't mind that if he did it. Gary said that the thing that he would resent is if Artie came in at 9 after Howard asked him to come in at 8 every morning. Gary said he doesn't think that anyone would have a problem with that. Jon didn't seem to have a problem.
Jon said that as long as they can agree to a schedule then they should be fine. Gary said that Artie might need to take some time off to do movies and stuff and that's the kind of agreement they have now. They could change that and Maybe Artie could come in at 7:30 every day instead.
Benjy said that you have to negotiate the best deal you can and that's what Artie has to do. Gary said that he'd like Artie to make more money so he doesn't think that he's not making enough. Gary said he just wants him to make more than him.
Jon took a call from a guy who said that Artie is just going with the wind and he's not going to be able to get out of this depression. The guy said that guys like Artie have no one to go home to and they get depressed thinking about this shit. The guy said that Artie is depressed because he's alone. He said that these guys just go from one broad to another and that's why they end up that way. The caller said that's not the life that anyone really wants. The caller said that it's a fucking nightmare to be in a relationship too though.
Gary said that no one is pressuring Artie to get into a relationship. Gary said that Artie is pushing it on himself. The caller said that it's in everyone and not just Artie. The guy said that when you don't do it you just feel out of it.
Gary said that Ralph is like that and he doesn't really need anyone else in his life. Gary said that if Ralph had money he'd be even more happy than he is now. The caller said that Ralph is a faggot, that's why he's happy. Gary said that Ralph really isn't gay. The caller said that he is a faggot and he knows a lot of guys like that.
Jon took another call from a guy who said that he'd like to know if Artie is going to start calling in sick more often now. Gary said he doesn't think so. The caller said that he thinks that maybe things aren't going that well for him and he's just going to start taking more time off. Gary said that he thinks Artie has to decide to either do this show or not do it.
will said that it seems that Artie was more open about it today than usual and Howard is willing to work with him on it.
Another caller asked if the guys are tired of this whole Artie saga and if they think that it's going to work out in the end. Gary said that he's immune to it and indifferent to it at this point. He said that it was more about getting his feelings out last week and now he doesn't get upset by it. He said that no one knows how it's going to end, even Artie.
The caller asked if they think that it could possibly end up ending in a good way. Gary said that they're kind of in the home stretch for the show ending in 2 years but they don't know if they'll be back for more time or not. Gary wondered if the guys think that Artie would sign on to do more time. Jon and Will said no to that. Gary said that he thinks that Artie will stay through this contract and he'll be done thinking that he kept his word to stay on for that whole contract.
Jon said that they have to look at the way things have gone so far and think about how it could end. Benjy said that they've had a good 8 years so far and they don't have to think that there will be an end to it.
Benjy said that Artie has said that he would sign up for more time if they did move the show to a later time. Gary said that Artie could end up not liking that time slot eventually though. Then what do they do?
Another caller said that Artie doesn't seem to be happy doing the show and they really need to get him out exercising and moving around. Gary said that he's not into doing that right now and that might not make him better.
Jon asked Gary about his cupcakes and if he's bothered that they're not eating them. Gary said that he has seen that people aren't eating them as much as they sued to. He said that he asked the people at Crumbs to stop sending so many up there. They had to end the show a short time later.