| Monday | Tuesday |
|
|
| Wednesday | Thursday |
|
|
| Friday | |
|
Howard started off the show talking about reading on SternFanNetwork about how they take too many days off after taking off Thursday and Friday. He said they'll be here all week this week.
Howard said he walked into the offices this morning and ran into Richard, JD and Jon Hein and he was overwhelmed by the smell of perfume to the point that he almost gagged. He said he went into Richard's studio later on and he was overwhelmed with the smell again and it was just way too intense. He said that Richard said he got some new body wash and that's what the smell was. He told him to tone that down because a man should not wear perfume.
Richard came in and told the guys that he would come up to Howard's desk a lot back at K-Rock because he didn't get that close to him. Now that he's not doing that as much, he wear's cologne because he likes the smell of it. Howard told him he's got to tone it down a bit because it's so intense.
Richard said the cologne is called Curve and he also uses Axe body wash. He said that using that stuff causes a rash on his neck a lot. Artie thinks that he's wearing this stuff because he's trying to cover up B.O. Fred thought Howard was exaggerating a bit but he got the smell within 2 seconds of Richard walking in the studio. Richard said it's either that or the smell of B.O. Robin came into the studio to get the smell and she said her eyes were almost watering. Then Fred caught the smell of Body Odor. He said that if he rotates he can get both smells. Artie went over and caught a whiff to see just how bad it was.
Richard was talking about how he has to walk over from his apartment every morning and that makes him sweat a lot. Artie was heading back over to his chair when he knocked over a bat that someone had made for him. Howard said that thing falls down every time he walks away from his chair.
Howard said he read that Cheap Trick once opened up for Stuttering John and he thought that was one of the saddest things he's ever read. John was playing in a band back then and they actually opened for his band. Howard goofed on John and what he may have said to the band to get them to shorten up their songs and things like that. Fred was also doing his John impression.
The guys were trying to remember just one of Stuttering John's songs from back then. Cheap Trick can probably do a 2 and a half hour show with their hits while John had maybe one hit. Artie remembered one song called ''Get Off My Lawn.'' That got Fred all revved up and doing his impression of John singing another one of his ''hits'' which was ''Talk My Way Out of It.''
Howard said it must have been crazy to go see Cheap Trick opening up for Stuttering John's band. He said that must have been the lowest moment in Cheap Trick's career. He's going to ask them if that was the case for them.
Howard took a call from King of All Japs who brought up Aaron Spelling's death and asked if Howard is going to comfort Tori Spelling. Howard got into a discussion about how Tori made a big mistake. He talked about how Aaron Spelling spent a year in bed at the age of 8 because of a psychological paralysis of his legs. He read a lot of books, eventually got better, went into the Army and then went to Hollywood to try and make it as an actor. He talked about some of the TV shows that Spelling produced and how they became so insanely popular.
Howard said at one point Spelling's production company was producing 1/3 of the programs on ABC TV. Some guy came in and said that they were going to change things and not have so many of his shows on the network. Spelling got depressed until FOX came to him and asked him if he wanted to produce a show about high school kids. That turned out to be ''Beverly Hills 90210.'' He said Aaron also had 2 shows on the air at all times, right up until the day he died.
Howard also talked about how Spelling liked to show off the money he made and that's why he had a 52,000 square foot house built. He said that Spelling loved his kids and actually imported snow to their home in sunny California. Tori has been on the show a few times and she did a reality show and really pissed off her parents because it was goofing on them. Howard said when you do something like that when your father is so close to death, that's nuts. He said that it wouldn't be surprising if she was cut out of the will completely. Robin said she heard that she may have made up toward the end there so she may be okay.
Howard said he doesn't remember if he ever interviewed Aaron... but he must have sent a message to him through Tori about how he would take care of his money when he passed away. Robin brought up this guy Warren Buffet who is going to give away his billions of dollars to charity. He's supposed to give most of it to the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation. The guy is worth over $40 billion and he's giving most of that to charity and a couple of billion to his kids.
Gary came in and brought up a story about Aaron Spelling and how he didn't fly because of an incident that happened to him when he was younger. He was supposed to take a flight but ended up driving home with a friend. The plane ended up crashing and his mother was told he had passed away but then pulled up in a car 3 days later. She made him promise never to fly after that.
Howard said that he's talked to his therapist about his fear of flying and how the shrink has told him it's no big deal if he dies. Robin said that more people die driving their cars then do flying. Howard said he does fly a few times a year but he really hates flying.
Robin said that Howard will only fly for vacation. He hasn't been out to California since 9/11/2001. Howard said he just hasn't had a reason to go out there since then. Robin said he hasn't flown out of the country either. Howard said he never did that. That led to the guys talking about places they could go outside of the country and Robin said that she's going to Italy in a couple of weeks. They're on vacation next week so she'll be going then. She wasn't even sure exactly where she's going.
Howard said he went out to see this movie ''The Devil Wears Prada'' with Beth and her sister-in-law. They saw it at a semi-private screening. He said that the story was good and Meryl Streep really is a great actress. He said if she was in ''Dirty Work,'' the movie would have been a success.
Howard said that he had a Wrap Up song thanks to this guy Grover who raps the week in review. He quickly played that song and then played a prank call that Sal made to an Indian grocery store. He gave them the name ''Iama Cocsucka'' and had them read the name back to him a few times.
Robin found that odd because Simon Cowell sits there and tells people they're fat to their faces. Howard said that they have to get rid of Elisabeth from that show because she's a ''fucking tard.'' The other women there weren't even agreeing with what she was saying. Barbara Walters was even saying that ''that's just Howard'' and not making a big deal out of it. Star Jones won't even mention Howard's name on the show but it seemed like she was setting Elisabeth up for that conversation.
Howard said he still thinks he was right and if he wanted to fuck Katherine McPhee, he'd want her to lose 15 pounds.
Howard said that Carnie Wilson is on Celebrity Fit Club and he had an audio clip of her talking about her struggles with weight even though she had her stomach stapled. She was talking about how she wants to show people how you have to work hard to get to where you want to. Howard said he can't believe that she got fat again after getting her stomach done. She was saying that she had a baby and that was the reason she got fat. Howard said she was already on her way to getting fat again before she got pregnant.
Jon Hein said that he went to see Adam's new movie ''Click'' over the weekend and it really was bad. He said that it starts out like every Adam Sandler movie with really dopey jokes but by the end of the movie it became a drama and kids were actually crying because Adam was dying on screen.
Howard asked Jon if he had any celebration for selling his web site for millions. Jon said he didn't do anything crazy. He had a birthday for his daughter but that was about it. Howard said there's some speculation about the amount that he actually got for the web site and some people are thinking it could be between 5 and 10 million bucks. Jon can't say what he got paid for it though.
Howard said that some guys on SternFanNetwork were talking about whether or not JumpTheShark.com has jumped the shark now. Jon said that was discussed in a newspaper article as well and that killed him.
Howard said there was a discussion on SFN about him going to a Christopher Reeve charity event. He said he was invited to it before Dana Reeve died and he wanted to meet her son and all of that. He said he went to the event and had his picture taken of course. He said people were complaining about his hair looking wet and the clothes he was wearing. People thought that Ralph had dressed him but Howard said Ralph doesn't dress him on the weekends.
Howard said he didn't meet Chris and Dana's son but he did meet Christopher's kids from his first marriage. His one daughter looks like a supermodel according to Howard. He said that the kids were great and it was a pleasure to meet them.
Howard said he went to this event on Thursday night where Scott Greenstein from SIRIUS was being honored. He said that he didn't want to go but Scott really wanted him to be there. He talked about his discussions with Martha Stewart's daughter who was there. Her mother wasn't there though. He said he was talking to Rob Jacobson from In Demand and he couldn't hear a word he was saying because it was so loud there.
Nelly Furtado did 3 songs and then left and after that it was about it. He said it wasn't much of a party and if you want people to donate to a charity, you have to put on a good party. Mel Karmazin was there and Howard said he couldn't' want to get out of there.
Gary came in and said that he saw a guy on a phone heading for Howard so he tried to cut him off. Howard said there were a bunch of idiots there but there were also some cool people there. Howard said he knows how to handle people who ask him to talk to their friends on the phone. He said he just tells them ''No'' when they ask. He has no desire to talk to people he doesn't know like that.
Howard talked about how short Nelly Furtado was. He said she's like a fidget and was just about talking to his penis because she's so short.
Howard said he saw that Nicole Kidman got married over the weekend and it was very odd how they kept announcing it like no one really cared. They spent a minute on that.
Howard said he's going to TiVo this new show ''Kyle XY'' that's going to be on ABC Family tonight. It got good reviews so he wants to check it out. It's about a kid who is born without a belly button and was created in some strange way. He said the review he read was way too detailed but he still wants to give it a shot.
Howard read some stories about Busta Rhymes whose wife is leaving him for a woman. He said she was quoted in the paper and she was saying that if Busta is crying over their relationship break-up then it's the bitch side of him coming out. Howard read that stuff and said that it's probably going to be some divorce.
Mike made a good point and said that they could have just sent Howard a note about the level of Robin's mic. Scott didn't need to go in there and change it. Howard said that Robin's mic was at almost the same level as his own mic was. Scott said that Howard is always right and he's always wrong. Howard said that Scott probably needed that money too because he doesn't make that much money doing that job.
Howard asked why Sal and Richard have a monitor in their studio. Richard came in adn said they like to see what's going on in there when they make calls as characters adn stuff. Howard said he wants that monitor taken out of there but Richard said they use it. Howard doesn't want them having a bunch of people in there watching naked chicks and stuff like that.
Mike asked about the classic tapes they have now and if they're going to have any to play during vacation. Hwoarsd aid they're working on them now adn they may have some stuff ready for the 4th of July weekend. He had to go to break after that.
Howard talked about how TV is the greatest invention for parents because kids will sit mesmerized in front of the TV for hours. Scott DePace came in and said that he's got problems in his house. He's got about 12 TVs in the house. Now he cant' get his kids to sleep without a TV on. Howard said he has to put a stop to that because kids shouldn't be watching TV when they're going to bed. Scott said his son was telling him that he's got spiders in his room and he can't sleep. Howard told him to tell the kid like it is and call him a pussy and tell him to go to sleep.
Scott asked Howard if he really thinks that he should cut them off from TV like that. He said he can't keep the arguing going and just gives in and lets them watch TV. Scott said he's got a 2 year old who goes to bed at about 8 and the kid doesn't even speak yet but he points at the TV until they find what he wants to watch. Howard told him that if he keeps up the TV watching thing, those kids will never sleep.
Howard said that maybe Scott could read to the kid instead of watching TV. He said he does that once in a while but he can't read the same things over and over again. Robin told him to read the kid some Sports Illustrated articles or something instead.
Ronnie thanked Howard for coming over to see the dog. Lisa asked if Howard brought a dog gift for him. Howard said he hasn't turned gay, he didn't bring any gifts. Howard said he was on his way home from Long Island and decided to stop by and say hello to him.
Howard had Lisa get to her stories. She said that they have an update on the cheerleader's who were suspended after appearing on the show. They have a new Page 69 clip from Jason and Will. They talk about how one of the news team was caught using the N-word. They'll also be talking about how Artie is paying someone to open his mail now. Artie said the same kid who loads up his iPod is opening the stuff for him. A lot of his mail was there in the studio so Howard and Artie went through that stuff. He had that bat that fell over earlier in the show and a picture that someone painted for him. Howard told Artie that he's got an archival room that he keeps stuff in and he could keep that stuff there.
Artie was talking about how much he's paying this guy to open his mail. He was also talking about how people ask him to do things like make audio tapes for their voice mail messages and things like that. He said he won't do that but he will sign autographs.
Lisa mentioned another story and also got in a plug for Sal's new show ''Kill or Be Killed'' which will be on Howard 101 tonight at 7pm. Howard has heard good things about the show which was taped at Caroline's comedy club recently.
Artie talked about hanging out with Shuli and Ferrall who he ran into over the weekend. He said that Ferrall has some really crazy stories to tell and that's Artie saying that his stories are crazy. Howard talked about how Shuli has worked his way into a lot of shows on Howard 100 and 101 and it should probably be called Shuli 100 and 101 instead. Howard figures that Ferrall will eventually get tired of Shuli and their breakup will be really bad.
Artie was under the impression that Ferrall was going to broadcast his show from the All Star game down in Philly but Howard said that Tim Sabean was telling him that there was no reason to do the show from down there so it probably won't be happening.
Howard moved on and said that they have some audio of Eric the Midget calling into some other shows since he won't call into his show anymore. Someone scammed Eric and told him that he was Diana DiGarmo's cousin and had him fooled. That led to the guy contacting Sal and telling him about it. Sal told Howard us that he had John Hunnerlach call Eric as Diana's publicist. Howard played the prank call where John asked Eric about how tall he is, how much he weighs and stuff like that. They took all of that and then told him it was going to be 750... Eric says ''750 what?'' and John says ''750 balloons!'' so Eric got all pissed off, called them some names and said that he's going to get them back later. Howard played a few Eric the Midget song parodies and bits after that.
Howard played the first Gary Garver interview with Bo Derek and George Barris. Gary was asking Bo some softball questions and then hit her with some questions about shaving her private area. She told him to shut up and then George Barris came walking up. Garver asked him some questions but he was busy talking to Bo. Garver then asked them to describe Howard Stern in one word. Bo said ''disgusting'' and George said he had never heard of him. Barris told Garver if he didn't want to talk sensible with him then he wasn't going to talk to him.
Howard played the next clip of Garver interviewing Gloria Allred. He asked her a question about politics. After hearing her answer the guys got into a whole discussion about how some conservatives can really spin stories in some wacky ways. Garver asked Gloria if she shaves her pubic hair and she didn't answer that one. Garver asked her about who she thinks is the most important person on Earth right now and when she last crapped her pants. She asked him when he last came up with questions that matter. Garver then asked her to describe Howard Stern in one word. She said ''successful.''
Howard said that Garver got an interview with Mamie Van Doren. He explained what a big star she was many, many years ago. He played the tape and Garver's first question was ''Who are you and what are you known for?'' She couldn't believe that was his first question and refused to talk to him after that. Garver tried again later and asked her what made her famous. She finally broke down and told him what made her famous. She went through her history and then Garver asked her if Howard Stern banged her. He meant to ask if Howard Hughes had banged her. She said that she actually used to listen to Howard Stern until he moved to SIRIUS. She said she's going to try and get back into that soon.
Howard said he had to take another break after that but Artie found a picture of a girl's ass in an FHM magazine that he thought was one of the best he's ever seen. It wasn't a famous chick's ass, it was just a girl-next-door's ass. Howard told a story about a conversation he and Beth had about getting old. He said she was talking about how she would only be about 80 when he's like 100 and he was telling her that he would wipe her ass with his tongue at that age. She wasn't turned on and he doesn't get that. He was also talking about how he should start dating a 26 year old now so his woman doesn't get as old as him.
Gary said that they were going through some old tapes and found the day that Artie came in after his first date with Dana and he was all happy about it. He figured they have to play that stuff and maybe some other Artie and Dana history. Howard went to break a short time later.
Howard gave a quick rundown of how they had Kevin in on the old radio show and he got Jillian Grace into the magazine. She went on to have some success as a Playmate. Howard read some notes about the first contestant today who was Shannon. He said that she's wanted to be in the magazine since she was 16 years old. She's never submitted pictures though. She's 19 years old now. Howard gave her a very welcoming ''Hello'' as she walked into the studio.
Howard asked Shannon if she's been in any bathing suit competitions. She said she does enter them quite a bit. Howard said that she looks a little bit like Jessica Simpson but Artie and Robin said they don't think she does. She was wearing panties and a bikini top and Howard said she didn't have any flaws that he could see.
Shannon rates herself as an 8 out of 10 so Howard asked her why she's never submitted pictures. She said she's just never thought about doing that. She told Howard that she's 5'8'' tall and weighs about 115 pounds. Howard asked Shannon if she wanted to show her breasts because it is Playboy magazine after all. She said she knows that and she might be willing to do that. Howard asked her if she would bang Hugh Hefner if she became a Playmate. She said she's not sure she could bring herself to do that.
Howard asked Kevin if he can tell if this chick is good enough just by seeing her that quick. Kevin said that he didn't think she'd be the right girl when he first saw her but once she came in under the right lighting, she looked great. She took her top off a short time later and Howard said that they didn't disappoint. Shannon was talking about her dating and Artie asked her if she's ever dated a guy who weighs as much as 2 guys. He was referring to himself of course.
Howard asked Fred what he thought at first. Fred thinks that Shannon blows Jillian Grace away. Gary aids that her body is perfect for Playboy but her face isn't quite there. He thinks that she's good enough to be tested. Howard thought her face was just right because it's a ''girl-next-door'' look that they look for. Artie said that she could make a million a week as a striper. He said that her face was the hottest thing he's ever seen. Fred asked him if he would go to therapy for her. He was so blown away that he said ''Yes!''
Howard had her turn around to show off her ass again. Then he went to Kevin Custer who said that he hates that there are women out there who think their boobs are too small. He told her to never touch her boobs, leave them the way they are. Howard said that in two weeks Pauly Shore will probably be touching that body. Artie told her to never come back if she does bang Pauly. Howard had her swear to god that if she gets in Playboy, she will not fuck Pauly Shore. She did that so Howard threw in a few other names like Scott Baio, James Caan and Artie added Drew Carey.
Kevin told Shannon that she is good enough to test for the magazine. He said that they'll shoot her out in Chicago or in Los Angeles. Shannon had mentioned that she has kissed other girls so Howard asked her more about that. She said she has kissed and felt boob but never had a finger in another girl. Howard asked her if she's had her ass eaten. She said yes to that but she's never used hers on a guy.
Kevin said that he will be the one shooting her pictures. He said she may need some make-up and hair done but her body is good enough that it shouldn't need any body make-up. Artie said he thinks that she's even hotter than Jillian Grace. Kevin said he doesn't see that though. He said that she may be too thin for the magazine.
Up next was Marie. Howard read some notes about her and she was rejected by Playboy not too long ago. She's 22 years old. Howard had her come in and said that she was looking good in her bathing suit. Howard had her turn around to show her ass. The guys were impressed again. Gary said that Marie's boyfriend was there and they could barely pry her away from him. The guys figure that she'll leave him if she does get into the magazine. Howard read some more notes about her and how she was actually asked to do another shoot for Playboy but she wasn't able to make it because she had to work. She never got another call.
Howard asked Marie about why she wants to be in Playboy. She said it's like having an official stamp of hotness when you get into it. Howard read some notes about her losing her virginity at the age of 15 and stuff like that. She's not into chicks though. Howard asked her about her boobs and if she thinks they'll stand up good enough for Kevin. She said she thinks they will. She whipped them out a short time later after saying she's never shown them to a bunch of guys before. Artie said they were beautiful.
Howard asked Kevin if they were too small. Kevin wanted to see her top completely off first so he asked her to take it off. Howard liked them even though she said they were only a B-cup. Kevin said that there may be a shape issue and it would mean finding the right poses for her. He said they could be a little fuller up top and they may have been hanging a little too much. He said they'd have to have her pull her hands up. She did that and showed the guys how they looked better that way.
Kevin said that he didn't want to tell her to get implants, especially if she's just going to do it to try and get into the magazine. Howard thought she had great legs and ass and Kevin agreed with that. She also had a very cute face according to Howard and Kevin. Howard said he thinks her face is right for the magazine and her body is great. Artie said she looks good enough for him. Gary said that her body was a little fuller than the last and she has a very pretty face. Fred said that Penthouse might be the right magazine for her. Her nose didn't hold up according to Fred.
Kevin said that her face is cute but he's not sure how she'd photograph. The boobs might be an issue because of the amount of work she might need. He said they could stick her in front of a camera and she would explode. He's not sure. He asked her what happened with her photo shoot with Playboy. She said it was for some kind of casting call that they do. Kevin explained that whole thing and then gave Howard the final word on Marie. Kevin said that he's really on the fence about this one. Howard told him that maybe he should give her a shot. Kevin said that Howard and the guys are the guys reading the magazine so he wanted their opinions. Howard said yes, Fred said no way... Howard thinks that she is playboy material and she might just need to be in the studio with some help.
Howard said he thinks that she could be even better than Jillian Grace. Kevin said that it is possible that she could blow them away but he's still on the fence... but he's going to give her a shot. She's going to Chicago for a test shoot. Howard told her not to get fat before she goes.
Howard wanted to move on to the third girl. Robin made a prediction about Marie and said that she felt she was a bit soft and she will never get into the magazine. Kevin said that he really has no idea how a girl is going to act in front of a camera though. That's what the test is all about. Howard is glad she's getting a shot.
Up next was Lindsay. Howard read some notes about her and said that she's a 32 AA-cup. She's 5'4'' and 103 pounds. She came in a short time later and the guys said she had a cute face. He said he saw some of her pictures and she is hot. She's got a great face and body according to him. She just has no boobs. Howard had her take off her top to show Kevin. She said they're very small. Howard told her as soon as she took her top off that there was no way that was happening. Kevin also told her that there's no way they could take her. He said that they would have to tell her that they wouldn't have an opportunity for her. He was saying that she's way too thin too. Howard said if she put on weight she wouldn't be as attractive.
Robin said that she's the perfect candidate for implants. Kevin agreed there and said that they're really small. They spent a short time talking about that and then Howard got into her story about the ''show'' she and a girlfriend put on for her boyfriend. She said that she and this girl started making out and eventually moved into the bedroom with her. She said that she and the other girl got it on in front of her boyfriend but she doesn't remember all of the details because they were so shit faced from drinking. Lindsay said she went down on this chick and did that for quite a while. She gave her an orgasm and the girl returned the favor. The other girl watched as Lindsay banged her boyfriend too.
Howard asked Lindsay when she knew she wasn't going to have boobs. She said it was Jr. High School when the other girls were getting implants. She said that she will get implants some day but she won't go bigger than a C-cup. Howard read that she wanted to ride the Sybian too so he asked her if that was true. She wasn't sure but she said she didn't want to disappoint so she got on. Gary started the machine a short time later and started it off slow. She started to get into it and started to moan within a few seconds. She claimed to have finished within a couple of minutes. She said that was nice and she wasn't sure if she could stand up or not. She was a bit wobbly from the machine.
Howard wrapped up with Kevin and said that all three of the girls were hot but only two are going to get tested. He had to go to break a short time later.
Howard told the guys they were talking about the most embarrassing moment for the band which they were talking about earlier in the morning. That was the time when they opened up for Stuttering John. The guys said that was a pretty sad moment for them but they still blew away his band. Howard asked the guys if John came out and asked them to rush through their set. One of the guys said they remember John asking for pot, but that was about it. Fred went into his Stuttering John impression and goofed on him for a short time.
Howard said he loves the band and even had them on his Private Parts soundtrack. He asked the guys how things are going for them. They said they were over in London and did some shows with Def Leppard. They were also saying that people over there know about Howard and that he's known as the King of All Media. Howard said he was shocked that their biggest hit song was ''The Flame'' which is one of those songs that they don't even like. They said they do play it once in a while during shows. Gary heard that they didn't write the song and when they listened to the cassette, Rick made them stop playing it and smashed the cassette on the ground.
The guys were saying that they were once asked to do the theme song for ''Joey'' but it got turned down. They do the Colbert Report and That 70's Show theme songs so they are getting some work. Howard asked Bunny how he's doing back in the back. He said he's one of his favorite drummers and wanted to know if he's getting laid. He said he's getting it regularly. The guys talked about getting married and things like that.
Rick talked about how he wrote most of the songs for the band. Howard was asking about ''I Want You to Want Me'' so the band went right into that one a few seconds later. Howard said whenever he hears that one he can relate to it.
After that performance Howard asked about the bass guitar because it's got 12 strings on it. He said he gets confused by that because there's so much going on there. He asked Rick about how he likes to throw his guitar picks at concerts. Rick said it just became a thing after he would do that after going through the picks pretty quickly while playing so hard. Howard also said that Robin's voice hasn't changed all that much and he still sounds great. He asked the guys about their past drug use and one of the guys said he still smokes pot. He said the best drug for him was acid and he actually did a show once while he was on acid. That got him kicked out of the band for a while.
Howard asked the guys to perform another song for them before they talk about the new album. They went right into their song ''Surrender.'' Howard asked them about that song and found out that they had to change their lyrics around quite a bit to get that song played on the radio. Howard told them that they really are great and so effortlessly.
Howard said that Cheap Trick is a great name for a band. They said that the record company didn't like it and wanted them to change it. Howard asked the guys some more questions about their history as a band and some of the wacky things they've gone through. He gave them a plug for their new album ''Rockford'' and played a track called ''Perfect Stranger'' since the guys didn't really prepare to play it in the studio. Howard also gave them a plug for their web site CheapTrick.com
Howard said the guys still sound good on the new album and he likes it. Robin asked if they get any air play these days. Rick said they do get some air play but he's not sure if it's because they feel sorry for them or what.
Howard took a phone call from a guy who said that Marilyn Manson performed one of their songs. The guys said they liked that. They also had Lindsay Lohan and Chris Isaac cover their songs as well. Howard asked the guys if there's any bands out there that they like today. They basically brushed that one off and said ''nah.''
Howard wrapped up with the guys a short time later. He gave them a plug for their new album and told them how great it was to hear them in there. They weren't cursing at all so Howard asked them if they wanted to curse at all. The guys didn't have much to say, Rick threw in some dirty words of his own like ''Manager'' and things like that. Howard went to break a short time later.
Howard and Robin both said they would ride the Sybian if that's what he's demanding to do the balloon thing. Howard said that he's a liar if he's not going to come in. Eric said he didn't think they'd be stupid enough to ride that thing. Howard said he really doesn't care. He also thinks that Eric will break down and come in once they book Katherine McPhee to come on the show. He figures that it will kill Eric if he can't come in or even call in to talk to her.
Eric said that he's no longer going to accept people on his Myspace account unless he knows them. That prank call that Sal had John Hunnerlach make to him made him lose faith in people. Howard said it's crazy that he even fell for it. He was also saying that Eric will fly like Superman on balloons. Eric kept saying that he's not going to do it and he knows himself better than Howard does. Howard said he knows Eric better than Eric knows himself and he will come in and do the balloon thing. Eric said he's known himself for 31 years while Howard has only known him for 4 years.
Eric was complaining about Mutt cutting him off the other night when he called the Superfan Roundtable. He said that he wanted to talk about why he has a problem with SternFanNetwork but Mutt cut him off. Howard told Eric a story and said his dream was to fly a midget with balloons on a radio show some day. He said Eric is the midget and he is his destiny. Eric told him to find someone else to do it because he's not going to be the one to do it. Howard said ''We'll see...'' and played the ''Fly Like a Midget'' song parody. He also played a prank call that Blue Iris made to Eric.
At one point Eric told Howard to have a heart attack and to go to hell. Howard played a Popeye theme song parody about Eric. He told Eric he's going to have bad karma if he keeps wishing him a heart attack. He wanted to confront him on that but Eric had already hung up on him.
That led to Howard asking Artie about what's going on with him and Dana. Artie is pretty sure that things are over between he and Dana. Robin asked why he's waiting to call things off. Artie said that nothing happened this weekend and he's not sure what's going to happen.
Gary came in and said he had some pictures from Vegas with Artie hanging out with some chicks at the pool at the Palms. Artie said that's the pool there every day. He said that it was the sickest pool scene he's ever seen before. Howard told Gary to put that one up on the web site. Artie pointed out that Steve Langford's hand was right there in the picture.
Ralph did his Eric the Midget impression and had a short conversation with Howard about that. Sal came in a short time later and said that the people on SternFanNetwork are trying to get Ralph kicked off the Friday Show. He was wondering if Howard wanted to try that for a week without Ralph. Howard likes him on there. He got back to the Eric the Midget thing for a minute and then said that he thinks Ralph is a good mix on The Friday Show. Sal wondered if he wanted to give it a try just one week without having Ralph on there. Howard said he's been doing a good job and he thinks that if he just kept his comments to a minimum, the audience will grow to like him.
Sal said that the audience has been consistent with Ralph and it sounds like they want them out of there. Ralph asked if they could take Sal out of his chair and let other people do the sound effects. Gary said they could stick Steve the Intern in there. Howard said he's read a few comments about Sal playing the clips too much so they'll test out the show without him doing that job.
Howard said they're going to rotate Sal out of that position for a couple of weeks to give it a try to see what it's like. Now Sal regrets going in there at all to throw Ralph under the bus.
Bobo called in and said that Ralph is good on the show because he's been with them since the Channel 9 shows and knows a lot of history. Howard said that Ralph just has to limit his comments and he's fine. Bobo was also telling Howard that he used to hate when they go on vacation but now that they won't be chopping up the old stuff, he's actually looking forward to it.
Howard said that he had another meeting about the classic tapes and he'd like to have the top 250 or 500 bits of all time... if they have time to do it. They have a lot of work to do though and they need time to do it. He's not sure if they have the time to get that done yet but he should know by today if they'll be able to pull it off.
There was some feedback about Howard's comments about Jessica Simpson and Kate Hudson looking good. Howard also read some mail about Jon Hein's recent selling of his web site to TV Guide for an unspecified amount of money. Some people were happy for him and thought that Howard wasn't really supporting him. There was some positive feedback about Johnny Fratto. He said only one e-mail he got was negative. Howard read some mail about Riley Martin's show. A lot of people are really into that show.
Gary jumped in and said that Jenna's web site actually made $30 million last year. Howard wondered why no one is buying his web site because he gets a ton of traffic. Howard had Gary come in with the article he was reading so he could check that out. He sounded amazed that they made that happen. He figured that someone like the Smoking Gun would be able to find out how much they actually got for the site.
Howard wondered what kind of overhead Jenna could have with that web site. Robin said they do have to hire girls to do other photo shoots. Howard read that Jenna and her husband are keeping their cut of a strip club the partially own in Arizona.
Howard said that the cost to join Jenna's web site is $34.95 a month. He checked out some of the stuff she has on the site and wondered if anyone would watch him doing masturbation scenes.
Gary told Howard that Richard recorded Sal coming back into his office after he got himself kicked off the Friday Show. Sal said that he'll take a day off on Friday if that's the case. Howard said that he wants Sal there working and not in the studio playing sound effects. He wanted to know from Gary who would annoy Sal the most by replacing him. Gary said that would be Steve the Intern since he is just an intern. Richard came in and said he will miss his lover Sal but he will help Steve learn where the clips are.
Jon Hein was in with his Wrap Up Show preview. Jon said they'll be talking about the Playboy evaluations that went on earlier in the morning.
While Jon was doing his thing Howard heard that Sal was out in the hall bitching about being taken off the Friday Show. Sal said that he was trying to let Howard know what the complaints were about the Friday Show and he's not sure how it got turned on him. Howard said he likes to throw people under the bus and that got him thinking about things on the show. Now they're going to make some changes on the show.
Howard had another song parody from Sal where he sings about his wife. He played that the parody which was to the tune of ''That's Life.'' The song is all about the things he can't stand about her and how he'd like to snap her neck and things like that. Howard said that song is going to be exhibit A at his trial.
Howard said he may have to give Sal his job back on The Friday Show just because of that song parody. He played Sal's apology tape that they got out of him during a recent scam they pulled on him. Gary came in and said that he asked Sal how he goes home after writing stuff like that. Sal said that his wife doesn't want to know what goes on there and doesn't care to know if he is doing the stuff she hears about.
Howard got back to Jon Hein and asked him for the rest of his rundown of the Wrap Up Show. Jon mentioned some of the other stuff that went on during the show today and what they'll be discussing. Jon mentioned the segment where Richard was arguing for whether or not he should have a monitor in his studio. Howard let him argue a little more but Richard's arguments weren't' enough for him. He said he doesn't think it's necessary to have people watching the raw feed of the show unless they really have to.
Scott the Engineer has a monitor as well and he's not sure why he needs that. Scott has never done anything that he needs a monitor for. Scott came in and said that they actually needed it today when Cheap Trick was in. Howard said that was a good reason, he's going to let Scott keep it.
Richard asked Scott how Tony Stewart did this weekend after he passed his curse onto him. Scott said Tony was doing well until his car blew up. Scott spent a few minutes with Tony a couple of weeks ago and since then, Tony has crashed, fractured his shoulder, crashed his car again, hurt his shoulder worse, had a driver take over for him because of his injuries, his car's engine blew up in the NASCAR race yesterday. Howard said that a guy who works there got kidney stones after working with Scott for a while. His black cloud appears to be contagious.
Siobahn told Howard she really needs a job and she'd like to do the thing with the tapes. Howard said he doesn't need someone who can't get a job working there. He's not giving her that job. She said that he was making her depressed now. Howard let her go a short time later and said they're going to try and make her dream come true by getting her laid tomorrow. Howard later told Gary to put Siobahn on the list of people they want to interview for that tape editing job. He said that they should probably give her a chance... even though he's not sure he could handle seeing her every day.
Howard read that the local FOX news station did a story about Aaron Spelling passing away and they ran a scroll on the bottom of the screen that read ''Aaron Spelling has past away...'' instead of ''passed away.'' He thought that was pretty interesting.
Robin finished up her news and Howard ended the show around 11:25am.
Howard started off the show talking about how beat he was. He tried going to bed early last night but they were lighting off fireworks in Central Park and they kept him up. He said it's not even the Fourth of July yet and they're blowing off fireworks. His dog gets freaked out and shakes from the loud noises. The dog was going nuts from the lightning storm over the weekend too. He said it was like the old days when Fred first started on the show and would shake when they got on the air.
Howard said that the new Superman movie is getting great reviews and four stars from a few reporters. He said the one guy who didn't get it was Marshall Fine who sent him a whole list of stuff that was wrong with the movie. Robin said that if you think of it as pure entertainment then it was a great movie. She said she had problems with the story too but it was so entertaining that she forgot about that. Howard talked about some of the stuff that Marshall sent to him about the problems he had with the movie. He said he had a lot of good questions but he liked the movie without thinking about that stuff.
Howard said he talked to Jimmy Kimmel and he likes the idea of an Artie magazine like Oprah's magazine. They could have Artie on the cover each month and all kinds of stories about him.
Howard took a call from a guy who talked about Cheap Trick's appearance on the show yesterday. He said they were great and they still have it. Howard said he agrees and he thinks that they do still have it and did some great performances. He said their music stands up today. The caller said he liked their new song too. Howard said he was watching Rick playing guitar and it comes so naturally to him that it was amazing to watch.
The caller also brought up the classic tapes that Howard has from K-Rock and how much he's looking forward to hearing that stuff. That led to Howard talking about how Barbara Walters is joining SIRIUS by offering up her old interviews for playing on the service. Howard thinks he may have had something to do with that because he saw her at a party one time and suggested that she do that.
Howard said his hair stylist was suggesting that they play groups of interviews when they play the classic tapes. Robin suggested a ''Gary gets Duped'' weekend. Gary was saying he wants to put together some Robin Meltdown groups of tapes. He had a few suggestions for that. Howard said he's had meltdowns himself that they can play. The caller brought up a band that Howard used to think was going to be a huge hit. The band was Hum and Howard was a huge fan of their song ''Stars'' but they were really cocky and young and never went anywhere. He said they were treating him like he was the plague and that they were a lot better than them.
Gary talked about how hard they were to work with. They were using amps in the studio back when they were at 600 Madison Ave. where the studio was tiny. They had to have their drummer back in another room because there was so little room in the studio.
The caller that was on the line asked about a bit they did where they had Dick Butkus helping out doing something with Rocky and Bullwinkle and he was laughing so hard there were tears running down his face. They remembered the bit and it's just another thing to add to the list of things to play.
Gary asked if Jackie the Joke Man has ever walked off the show. They remembered a time when Jackie got upset at a roast they did on the WWOR Channel 9 show. Jackie bombed at the roast and the audience didn't laugh at his act. He confronted Howard and accused him of telling the audience not to laugh at his act. Howard said he didn't know how to defend himself with that because he didn't do that.
Howard said the letters coming from Cabbie are kind of creepy because there's a big stamp on the back that says the prison is not responsible for what might come from the letter. He said Gary used to get the letters there at SIRIUS and Gary would open them. Now he gets them at his place and shreds each one before he even opens it. He did get curious yesterday when he got the letter so he actually read it.
Cabbie has dropped the both his name Cabbie and his real name Lee Mroszak. He's come up with a new name and he's signed it on the paper but it's not readable. Cabbie says that ''Cabbie is dead.'' Howard read the letter he got yesterday where Cabbie says that he's thinking that the prison isn't giving him the mail he's getting sent to him. Howard said he hasn't written to him in about 10 months and if any of the audience tells him that, he's going to get upset.
Cabbie reveals that he is bringing back his name ''Cabbie'' and that new name he made up is gone. He's got 6 weeks left in prison so he should be out by the end of July. He's not sure if he has a job but Howard said he's pretty sure he doesn't. Gary said that Tim Sabean is wondering what he should do if Cabbie comes looking for a job. Gary doesn't know. Howard said they'll just blame Tim for not having a job for him if they can't find anything for him. Tom Chiusano will probably be bothered for a job as well so Howard figures he should quit the business over that.
Gary said that when Cabbie shows up there and they get the call from security, he's going to transfer the call right to Tim Sabean. Howard said that it would be interesting to have Cabbie doing a show there. Gary agreed and said that it could be interesting if he actually talks about what went on there. Howard figures nothing actually happened and he wouldn't talk about anything.
Howard was saying that the power chord really hits him and he can feel it in his shaft. He was saying that he'd like to talk to the band now and ask them why they were such assholes back when they were on the show. Gary talked about how there was a lot of pouting and kicking the air going on out in the halls when they were on the show that time.
Fred found some information about the band and they're all split up and doing all kinds of other jobs instead of playing in bands. A couple of the guys are married, one guy is working in pharmaceuticals, the other guys are off doing their own thing. Howard had Fred play the Switchfoot song he was thinking sounded like them but he got sick of that after a short time.
Gary gave Howard an update about the time Jackie walked off the show and found that he really did walk off the show the Tuesday after the roast. He found the notes in the log about that walk out and how Howard and the guys were trying to figure out why he did.
Howard took a call from a guy who said that there was an article about Mel Karmazin talking about how he would be up for buying XM radio. Howard said Mel was saying that he'd be interested but there are issues that would stop that from happening. Mel wasn't saying he was actively pursuing buying them but it would be an interesting idea. XM was contacted and said they don't comment on the wishes of their competitors. Howard spent a minute talking about that and how it really doesn't mean much. It just shows that Mel isn't opposed to buying XM.
The caller on the line said that he ran into Beth one time outside of Robin's house and tried to take her picture but she wouldn't allow it. That got Howard talking about how creepy the guy is trying to get pictures of people from the show because he knows where Robin lives. The guy said he wasn't just hanging out there, he was driving around in his car near Robin's house. Howard was trying to explain to him how creepy that sounds but the guy didn't think he was doing anything wrong. Howard let him go since he couldn't get him to understand.
Howard read a story about Vince Welnick from The Grateful Dead and The Tubes committing suicide back on June 2nd. He was thinking that he was someone else until he read the article. Robin said she brought that story up back around when it happened but Howard didn't remember it. Fred played one of the songs they were talking about but Howard cut that off and played the Ralphie Cakes song parody saying he likes that one better.
Howard played a prank call that Crackhead Bob made to a Chinese restaurant where he tried to place an order but the woman was unable to understand what he was asking for.
Howard brought up a story about the author of the Harry Potter books and how she's thinking about killing him off before she dies so that no one can go back and take over her stories and ruin them.
Howard said that there have been a couple of stories of guys who were killed while riding bicycles in the city lately. He quickly went over that and then talked about the Superman movie again. He said they did some interesting stuff like putting the original Jimmy Olsen and Lois Lane in the movie.
Howard read an article about Rush Limbaugh getting detained at an airport for a few hours. They found a bottle of Viagra in his luggage and it didn't have his name on the bottle. There were two doctor's names on the bottle instead. Howard said that he was coming from the Dominican Republic which is a place where a lot of guys go just to get laid. He's not sure if that's what Rush was doing but it doesn't look good. Now the entire country knows that Rush is using Viagra. Robin said ''Look at him... '' and pointed out that maybe that's his problem. He's a mess. Robin said it would be great if he was down there for young boys or something.
Howard said that Scott DePace is saying that his detainment was a Democratic conspiracy. Scott came in and said he never said that and Jason is an idiot. He said that all he said was that Democrats aren't the only ones who are investigated. Jason came in and said that he did say that it was a democratic conspiracy out in the hall. Scott kept denying it and Jason called him a liar. Howard and the guys talked about how creepy Rush is with his Viagra and Oxycontin.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked Howard what he thinks about Warren Buffet giving away billions of his fortune to the Bill and Melinda Gates foundation. Howard said the guy was probably thinking about what he could do with the money while he's still alive since he's 75 years old. He figured he could wait until he passes away or just help some people out while he's still alive. There are some people who actually do care about the things that are going wrong in this world.
Robin said she was watching a show where they talked about how Bill Gates and his foundation are actually doing something about the real problems in this world while Congress is busy arguing over flag burning. Howard said that Warren Buffet is setting an example by doing this. A lot of people don't give away their fortunes and it's left behind for families to fight over. Howard thinks it's great that he's giving the money to charity and it's a great example for the world.
Robin said that Ted Turner was one of the first guys to do something like this but he didn't have quite as much money to give as Warren Buffet does.
The caller got Howard talking about the war in Iraq and then about the Hurricane Katrina disaster. The government isn't to blame for all of the problems down there because people abused the system so much as far as taking money they shouldn't have. Howard was talking about Social Security and Medicaid and how people have abused those systems and are bleeding them dry.
Howard said when Bill Gates and Warren Buffet give their money to charity and try to do something right, it's nice to see. The caller was telling Howard that he is the man after hearing everything he had to say about that stuff. Howard let that guy go and took a break after mentioning that this guy John is going to try and Bang Siobahn again today.
Andrea told Howard that she put that song ''I Want You To Want Me'' as her ring tone for KC a couple of years ago. She was also rambling a bit about some nonsense so Robin asked her if she was drinking again. She said she may have a had a few drinks. She was talking about KC as well and wondered if Howard was upset with KC for banging her.
Howard said that both of them are confused and suggested to KC that it may not have been a good idea for him to sleep with her because he doesn't love her. Andrea tried to explain how the whole KC thing happened. She said that KC came to her door while they were up at a hotel in Boston and that's where he banged her. She said that she never expected him to do that. She said that ''Zotard'' is the one who answered the door in her room. She didn't believe that it was KC there.
Andrea said that KC was very sweet to her and she was very happy when it happened. Howard wanted to know if Zolar left the room while she and KC were doing it. Andrea said that she and KC went back to KC's room and got in the bathtub. No words were spoken according to Andrea. She said she just knew what was going on. Howard tried to get the story down and found out that KC asked her to come back to his bathroom and things just started.
Andrea said that they did some foreplay. She gave him some oral and then KC wanted her in the shower real quick. She said she didn't know if he wanted it or not, she just did it herself. Andrea said that KC's friend was in the room so they went into the bathroom. KC then sat on the toilet with his penis out so she figured he wanted oral.
Andrea said it was actually very romantic. Howard said that the trick to getting girls is not sitting on a toilet with your penis out though. Andrea said they got in the shower after the oral since that's where KC wanted to have sex. She was very pleased with what was going on. KC asked her to go back to her room but she wasn't able to remember her room number so they had to go down to the front desk and ask.
Andrea said that she and KC are very much alike and people don't realize that. Howard said they're pretty sure they do realize that. Andrea told more of the story about going back to her room to have sex. She said she wasn't sure if KC blew his load during the oral. He did finish in her room and he may not have used a condom. She said KC will probably get upset if she talks about this stuff. She then told Howard that KC blew his load on her back because they were doing a lot from behind. She said she had an orgasm every time they did it.
Andrea said that she and KC always have fun when they hang out together. KC went out to gamble after the sex stuff. She had to get some rest so she stayed in her room and got some sleep. Howard said that KC could have stuck around to cuddle with her but he ran off to gamble instead.
Robin asked Andrea if KC was a good kisser. She said she didn't remember. She said she does remember that she was scared because KC was hiding her to make sure his girlfriend didn't find out about this. She said she was just calling in to let Howard know that KC didn't take advantage of her like he thought. She said she got a good friend out of this whole thing so she's happy.
She claims that KC is the only guy from the show who she has banged. Artie went into his Jeff the Drunk impression and said that he banged her. Andrea thought it was really him and told him to stop because she didn't bang him.
Andrea revealed that she's going to be tested for mental problems tomorrow and she's kind of afraid. She's going to be tested to see if she's bi-polar. Howard asked her if she hears voices and she said she does. She wasn't sure if she wanted to talk about it because she might start crying. She said she hears voices telling her not to drink certain things. Howard thought that sounded like an OCD thing.
Howard asked Andrea if her TV has ever talked to her. She said that hasn't happened but she sometimes can't look at herself in the mirror because she sees a picture of what she might see if she looks. Huh? Howard wondered if the voices ever tell her to do bad things to people. That doesn't happen but she thinks that people are after her and people think she's crazy even though she's really not.
Howard said that the mental issues are the reason he told KC it may not have been a good idea to bang this chick. Robin said that both of them are mental so it's like a match. Howard wrapped up with Andrea and let her go a short time later. She said she may be coming in at the end of the month to perform with this guy Trent Tomlinson but that's up in the air right now.
The guys all thought it was a very funny call. Howard had another clip to play. In the clip a reporter is outside of a courtroom doing a report about a guy who had the cops looking for him. The guy who the cops were looking for then walked up to the court and got on camera with the guy. The reporter spoke to the guy and asked him some questions. The guy said that his son didn't have anything to do with the crime and he wasn't going to admit that he shot his neighbor. It was a pretty freaky clip.
Lisa said that Shuli is at Siobahn's apartment waiting for this guy John to show up to bang her. So far nothing has happened. Lisa said that Sal may have put his foot in his mouth again with some racial comments. They will have a report on that. They will also be talking about the Riley Martin Drinking Game and how people are using that to get drunk. Lisa said that High Pitch Eric's apartment got a makeover by a web based TV show so they'll be talking about that as well.
Howard took a call from a guy who suggested that they get rid of Eric the Midget from the show. Howard said he is like a soap opera and he keeps teasing them with the balloon flying thing. They won't be getting rid of him though. The caller also told Artie that the Mets rule and the Yankees suck. Howard went into a new Eric the Midget song parody to the tune of the Green Acres theme song.
Howard read that Star Jones may be announcing that she's leaving The View in July. She's been there for almost 9 years since the show started. Howard said the show's ratings have been going down and this may get people to start watching again. Rosie O'Donnell is joining the show as of September and Star may not want to be there for that.
Howard said Craig called him to ask if he was serious about doing a Sam Kinison play. Gary wondered why Craig will keep calling even after Howard has said on the air that he made a mistake by doing that. Howard said he used to talk to Craig a bit shortly after Jackie left and he's been using that number since then. Gary said that Craig got that number about 5 and a half years ago and he's still abusing it.
Howard said he was thinking about Aaron Spelling's death and how great that guy was because he put his daughter on ''Beverly Hills 90210'' because she couldn't get any work anywhere else. He said that with her looks she probably wouldn't get any other work. He wondered if his son could have convinced him to give him the Luke Perry part on that show.
Gary asked if they could bring Richard back from Siobahn's apartment because that guy John isn't showing up to bang her. That guy begged to try and bang her again and now he doesn't show up. That's the biggest let down. If the guy didn't want to do it, he shouldn't have begged to do it. Gary said he got a call from Dave Lerman who didn't want this guy to bang Siobahn because he wants to do the trivia contest where he may have to bang her.
Howard said he felt bad for Richard and bought him the TV just to help the guy out. It's not that he likes Richard more than Sal or anything like that. He read that Sal was saying he doesn't care about the TV. Gary came in and said that Sal was saying he really didn't care about the TV and gave him a new Riley Martin song parody so he had Howard play that. Howard wanted to put Sal back on the Friday Show after that because he's afraid he'd go nuts if he didn't.
Howard apologized to Sal about keeping the TV thing a secret. Sal came in and said that he's done voicing his opinion on the show because he just gets ridiculed. He's going to keep his mouth shut and just stay in the back. Howard said he kept it a secret so he wouldn't go nuts. Sal then asked Howard what he's going to do to compensate for that. Howard isn't going to do anything. Sal thanked him for giving him that great job and went back to his studio.
Howard replayed the isolated clips of Crazy Alice yelling at Artie the day they were going back and forth during the show. He was going to read some e-mail but he had to break first. He got sidetracked when he said he heard that Beetlejuice was arrested in a store after he was unable to pay for the stuff he ordered. Will came in and said that Beet's manager Sean didn't want to talk about it on the air but they may talk to him about it the next time he's in.
Howard wondered why they have a ''top 5 guy'' who has to e-mail them. Scott came in and said there's a guy from Billboard who e-mails them a list each week and didn't get one this week. He said he used to pull the top 5 from the list himself but this guy was sending it to them before the list came out. Howard told him he should just get the job done.
Howard went off on Scott for a short time and told him to get the job done, he wants that stuff available when he goes for it on his computer.
Howard said he learned from the movie ''The Devil Wears Prada'' that he has to be more of a hard ass as a boss. He had Fred play the songs that he had on his list so he played some Shakira, Nelly Furtado... and then Howard asked Gary why this job isn't getting the job done. Gary said that it's Sal's job and he was deflecting it to Scott. Sal was in Gary's office blaming Gary for deflecting it onto him.
Sal and Gary came into the studio to try and straighten this out. Sal said that it was Gary's responsibility and he forwards the mail to him and Scott. Gary said that's not true, he told the guy to send the stuff directly to Sal and Scott. Sal was saying that he was never assigned that job, he was in charge of including the song parodies with the real songs for Howard to play.
Sal was also saying that Scott is in charge of getting the top 5 songs ready for Howard to play. Sal was pushing it off on to Scott and Gary was still trying to put the responsibility on Sal. He asked Sal why he would get the Top 5 list from Billboard if he wasn't in charge of it. Sal said that Scott is in charge of loading the top five songs and he has nothing to do with it. Sal told Howard to remove those curly locks from his ears and listen to him.
Howard told Sal not to yell at him and then said that he has been in charge of the Top 5 since he took over for KC years ago. Sal wondered why Scott isn't taking blame for this. Gary said that's because it's supposed to be his job to watch over and make sure that Scott gets the job done. Howard kicked the three of them out of there.
After booting the guys out of there he saw that those three were arguing out in the hall. They didn't have any audio out there so no one heard what was going on at first. They eventually got a microphone out there and listened in as Sal and Gary were arguing.
Fred played Young Jock and Camillionaire as the number 4 and 5 songs. Howard said that Bad Day finally fell off the top 5 list.
Howard took a call from Hook Nose Mike who said that it seems like the staff is getting too comfortable there. Howard said that's because he's a nice guy and lets things slide but he owes it to his audience not to let stuff like that happen. He said it may be time for a shake up. He told Fred he was fired even though he had nothing to do with the disaster.
In one voice mail Wendy is singing her own song while drunk. Howard asked her what she's drinking. She said it's wine coolers. He played another message where she was singing about how she hates Gary the Retard. Her Karaoke machine was locking up so she had to call back to sing along to Super Freak.
Howard asked Wendy if she's worried about drinking killing her brain cells. She said she is but then rambled something about Artie. Robin wondered how many brain cells Wendy has to spare. Howard figured it was about 30. He asked Wendy what 12 divided by 3 is. She said 200. Howard blamed the wine coolers for her not being able to answer. Wendy said she ran out of wine coolers last night. Howard told her that he hopes this doesn't offend her but he thinks she has a beer belly. Fred got a laugh out of that.
Howard asked Wendy if she knows what a clit is and then asked her if her belly hangs over her pussy. She said yes to every question he asked about her cleaning that area and pleasuring herself in the shower. She said she can get over 3 fingers in there when she's pleasuring herself. She said she once put a pencil in there and tried to get a bowling ball in there. She also claims that she sniffs her fingers and they smell like cotton candy. She's also stuck her fingers in her ass and that smells like diarrhea.
Wendy said she really doesn't like Gary the Retard and she thinks he should grow up. Howard let her go after that and played a prank call they made to Gary the Retard recently where they had him stuck in a phony voice messaging system.
Artie said his father used to raise pigeons when he was a kid and he used to show him the birds up close when they'd work on the roofs. Howard asked the guys if they feel bad for lobsters when they get thrown into a lobster pot while they're alive. There was an article about this company that has banned the sale of lobsters because it's inhumane to treat them the way they do. Howard said he feels creeped out by that stuff. He read about another guy who has come up with another way to kill the lobsters by shocking them quickly instead of boiling them alive.
Scott DePace came in and said that he finds the killing of lobsters not to be any more inhumane than chopping the head off of a fish or something like that. Gary said that you don't chop a fish's head off right after it comes out of the water, you let them die due to the lack of water. Like that's any more humane. The guys spent a few minutes talking about that stuff and Howard told Scott to go kill a squirrel and put it on his head so he's not bald anymore.
Howard said he brought that stuff up just to find out what everyone thinks. Robin told a story about Jackie the Joke Man trying to cook some lobsters and how he didn't have enough propane to boil the water so the lobsters were simmered to death. Howard said he would probably electrocute the lobsters if he had to choose between that and boiling them.
Artie accepted her apology even though it wasn't much of one. Howard read through some e-mail after that. He got some feedback about the girls who were in for the Playboy evaluations yesterday. There were also people who wrote in about the Ralphie Cakes song that they've been playing a lot lately. Howard played the song and read through some other mail. Someone complained about the sound effects that Sal plays during the Friday Show. People were suggesting that they take them away from Sal before they ruin them. Some people think that Sal plays too many and at the wrong time. Howard said that means that Sal is off the show again...
Howard got an e-mail about George Barris because he didn't know who he was. The writer told Howard about the cars that the guy has created over the years. The writer called him the ''god of the custom car world.'' Howard told the guy to get over it.
Howard got a lot of mail about Cheap Trick's appearance yesterday. A lot of people thought they were great. An e-mailer asked if Robin has a crush on Bubba because she seems to get wet every time she talks about him.
Howard asked Ronnie if he wanted to talk about the behind the scenes stuff. As he was coming in they played his theme song. Ronnie said that it really was disgusting between the thermometers up the ass and all of that, it was gross. He said that Richard was in the bathroom talking about how he could piss from 5 feet away but he was pissing all over the seat and making a mess. He said it was like a geyser going all over the place. He told Howard he's got to watch it. There was also the segment where Scott gets yelled at for changing the board during the show. He said that was great as well.
Howard took a call from a guy who brought up the Simple Life and how lame that show has gotten since it moved to E!. Howard said he doesn't care about E! anymore but they seem to have a way of taking shows and screwing them up. He said they should have been able to work something out with Paris and Nicole and make something out of it. They can't seem to pull that together though.
The guy was also asking for a CD of Crazy Alice calls and Miss Howard Stern singing. Howard said that he would suggested that Andrea not put out a CD because anyone on the show who has put out a CD hasn't sold too many. Jeff the Drunk is one of those people and his CD isn't selling all that well. He had to go to break after that.
Richard came in and said that turtle tastes kind of like gizzards or liver if you're into that. Howard wanted to know what a gooseberry was. Richard said it's a berry that's green and kind of makes your lips pucker up. He said that's actually pretty good too. He hasn't been out to Kansas since Christmas so he's looking forward to going back next week.
Howard asked Richard if his father takes a shower as often as he does. Richard wasn't sure but he remembers him taking a crap a lot because he'd leave the door open all the time. He said his mother showered a lot. That must be a girl thing out in Kansas.
Howard gave the pictures to Benjy to give Eric the word on her. Benjy is on Eric's good side. He told Eric that she's a very good looking girl so Howard asked Eric if they had his interest now. Eric said ''Maybe...'' Then he said that if they put that cartoon up on his Howard TV channel, then there's no way he's going to fly. Howard said he's putting the cartoon up there and he can't stop him.
Howard told Eric to check his e-mail while he was talking to him to find out what he thinks of this girl. Eric told him to hang on and he'd check. Howard said the woman isn't opposed to going out with someone who has a handicap so who knows what could happen.
Eric said he had to log on to AOL to check his mail. He got on and said that she is pretty good looking. Howard said the girl is willing to go out with him so he should go ahead and fly with balloons. Eric said he's still not willing to do it. He doesn't care that he's not going to meet this girl.
Howard was going to put the girl on the phone with Eric if he wanted to do that. Eric said he might be willing to do that. While they were waiting Eric was telling Howard that when he first agreed to do the flying it was low key, then it got blown out of proportion and they were talking about putting him in a Superman outfit and things like that. Howard said he doesn't have to wear that if he doesn't want to.
Gary said the other thing that Eric is afraid of is that he might not get into the Little People of America group. Howard said he doesn't need that group anyway. Howard did an impression of Eric and pretended to be another little person who was in the group.
Howard asked Gary what was going on with the girl. Gary said they couldn't get a hold of her. Howard told Eric they'd talk to him tomorrow. Gary told Howard they had a new Eric the Midget song parody. Howard played that one and it was to the tune of Sugar Ray's ''I Just Want to Fly.'' Eric said that Sugar Ray's version was better.
Gary interrupted and said they got the girl on the line right before Howard let him go. Howard told Eric to hold on while they get her ready to come on the air. Howard told Eric that it was tough to find a girl who didn't find him repulsive. Eric said he's not sure why Beth O doesn't find him repulsive.
Howard had this woman Valerie on the phone. He asked her to tell them about herself. She said that she's 27 , an ex-Hooters girl and she's in law school right now. She said she actually looks much better now than she did when those pictures were taken. She asked Eric if he was going to come hang out with her. He said that he would like to hang out with her but the flying with balloons thing is something he wouldn't want to do.
Howard asked Valerie if she would really go out with him. She said she would take him out dancing and party with him if he wants. She would treat him like a king and go on a real date with him. Valerie said she doesn't really have a boyfriend but she has been talking to a guy. She said anything is possible with Eric though and you never know if she'd be attracted to him.
Howard told Eric that he could be like David Blaine doing a stunt with his hot chick girlfriend standing by. Artie said something about him looking like an ''odd looking midget David Blaine'' which didn't go over too well with Eric. He said that's the kind of stuff that makes him not want to do this whole thing. Howard asked Valerie to send them some more pictures so they can see what she looks like today.
Valerie told Eric that bigger is not always better. She said that she takes care of a quadriplegic every day and has to wipe his ass for him. She said she can even lift him up and he weights 185 pounds. Howard asked if he could talk to the quad. She went over to him and held the phone up to him. He's on a ventilator so it sounded tough for him to speak. He was saying that she once blew out his urethra while inserting a tube in there though. He said she's hot and has talked about going out with Eric before.
Howard found out that Valerie actually pulls the doody out of his ass. She said she does that every other day for him. She pulls out the turds one at a time. She said she gets paid upwards of $30 an hour to do that job. Howard told her she's a saint and asked Eric what he thinks. He said it sounds interesting to him but he has to think about it. Howard thinks he's going to fly and he told him he knew that would happen.
Valerie said that he's got to fly when he knows he's got D-cups waiting for him when he lands. She was saying all the right things according to Howard. She was even saying that she might have some girls over once in a while for her man. She revealed that she's completely waxed down below and said she'd even come in and get waxed in the studio if they wanted to see that.
Howard asked Valerie if she's into anal. She said she's not into that and prefers to have it in her mouth or between her tits or in her vagine. Howard said ''Fuck Eric, I'm gonna fly.'' Valerie said she has a flat stomach and said she's not a fan of belly fat. Howard figured he was out then but she said on a man it's okay, just not on a woman.
Howard asked Eric where he was at because he should be pushing him out of the way to get to this chick. Eric didn't have much to say. Howard let Valerie go after that and said that Eric is very intimidated by girls. He told Eric that he'll never have a better offer than this. Eric still has a problem with the balloon thing. He said that he kept quiet because he's not that great of an interviewer and his radio show proved that. Howard told him he's got to have some kind of rap with the girls. He told him to call back tomorrow with his final decision.
Artie said that Eric seems to get depressed when he gets these great offers. Howard went into the ''I Just Want To Fly'' song parody again after letting Eric go. He said a lot of people are sick of Eric but he's pretty sure they'll get over that once he does the flying thing. He played the prank call that they had John Hunnerlach make to Eric the other day.
A phone caller said he couldn't believe that Eric wasn't ready to fly across the country on balloons to go out with that chick. Artie and Robin said that a lot of people want to see him fly. Howard is sure that they will get him to fly.
Sal said he would probably sell the TV to get money because he's really in the hole after losing a lot of money in the stock market. Gary came in and said that the TV is actually a 50 inch TV and not the 100 inch that was first discussed... So it's not a $20,000 TV, it's more like $4,000 or so.
High Pitch Mike from the news department came in and said that he wants to win the TV because these guys just want it to sell it. He wants the TV to keep. He said he's probably willing to do something that none of those guys were willing to do. He was willing to cover his face with Saran wrap and let Siobahn sit on his face for the TV. Richard said he would do that, so would Will. Sal said he'd bust up one of his eyes to look like Mike for that TV.
Will said that he's willing to let someone smack him in his face with their dick three times. Howard thinks that's one up on Mike's stunt. Artie said it would be tough for Will to go back to Philly after having something like that done. Howard asked the guys if there was anyone else willing to do the same thing. Sal said he might let someone fuck him in the ear to one up him.
Richard said he was willing to let High Pitch Eric shit on his chest... and he thought that was less gay than getting slapped in the face. Sal said that he would one up that one and let High Pitch shit on his chest, then kiss his balls before he wipes. Will was willing to let Eric crap on his foot and still take the penis in the face.
Richie Wilson is willing to get a tattoo on his ass that says ''Insert cock here'' and he'd keep it for a year. Howard thinks the dump thing is the worst out of all of that. Gary heard that Richie was willing to get the N-word tattooed on his arm and walk around Harlem. Richie said that was just a joke, he didn't want to do that.
Howard thinks that Sal is the top of the list right now. Will thinks that kissing the balls is no worse than taking the penis in the face. Mike wanted to have the fans vote on line for which is worse out of them all.
Ralph called in and said that taking the cock in the face is the worst because it's out of character for Will. Richard and Sal have been doing gay doody stuff for a long time now. Sal still thinks that doing the crapping thing is worse though. Ralph was sticking with Will and his stunt.
Ralph asked Will if he would let a guy do that if he had some cum on his cock. Will said there can't be any goo on the guy's cock. Gary said that Will's stunt is out of character but Sal's stunt is way over the top, even for Sal.
Richard said that he would let Eric crap on his chest and then wash it off with his piss. Howard said that's so disgusting that he's not sure he'd be able to watch that. Robin told Richard he was crazy. Will was ready to back out after hearing that one. The guys warned Sal and Richard that they could get really sick from something like that. They were talking about wearing goggles but that won't help if they get it in their mouth.
Mike said that he'd be willing to remove the Saran wrap from his stunt and have Siobahn sit on his face. Howard and the guys sounded like they were almost ready to go with his stunt at that point. Richie said that they should make him take that for 50 seconds, one second per inch on the TV.
Howard said he thinks he could take High Pitch Eric's shit on him easier than he could take Siobahn's fake vagina on his face. Will wasn't willing to go with the Siobahn thing either. Artie said he's thinking about Will because if he goes to a Philly game of any type, people are going to have T-shirts made up of him with a penis being slapped on his face.
Sal said that he would be willing to have all of these stunts put on a wheel and he'd do anything that comes up... as long as his wife lets him do the tattoo thing that Richie suggested. Mike came in with another suggestion. He said they could send Sal up to Harlem and yell out the N-word. No one was interested in that.
Howard said that this Panasonic TV is so great that all of these people are willing to do some crazy stuff for it. He gave them a plug and said you can check out the Panasonic TVs at PanasonicConcierge.com
They're going to put all of this stuff up on HowardStern.com so the fans can vote for what they want to see. Will was locked in with the penis slapping his face and a crap on his foot. Howard said Richie will do the tattoo thing and get ''Insert Your Cock Here'' on his ass. They had to decide on size and Howard told him to draw it up with an arrow pointing there. Gary came in and said he heard that Will and his girlfriend had to discuss all of this stuff last night. Will said that he was willing to add one more thing to his stunt. He would let a guy cum on his foot as well as the shit.
Artie said he would rather die than do any of the stuff these guys were willing to do. Howard said that High Pitch Mike will let Siobahn sit on his face with no Saran wrap on his face... for 50 seconds. Richard will let High Pitch Eric shit on his chest and wash it off with his own pee.
Howard took a call from a guy who said that Will had better not show his face in Philly if he does this stuff. Ralph called back and said that Richie getting a tattoo isn't that big of a deal so they should switch up the stunts and have other people do them. Howard said anyone there can take on anyone else's stunt. He also asked Mike if he'd use his tongue on Siobahn. Mike won't do that.
Howard took a call from a guy who suggested a stunt that was a little too much for them. Bobo called in and said that Sal should take it if he's willing to do any stunt that came up on the wheel. He was ready to take on the tattoo even though he said he might not be able to do that earlier. The other guys weren't willing to do it so Howard took that out of the equation.
Sal said that he will take Eric's shit on his chest and then he'll kiss his balls. High Pitch Eric called in and said he might have a problem shitting on someone on command because it would be in front of people. Eric asked if he could have a bucket of chicken to get prepared. Howard told him they'll help him prepare. He said his shit is runny sometimes so he needs that chicken to help him out. Sal found it funny that they're all doing this stuff for a 50 inch TV and all Eric wants is a bucket of chicken.
Doug Herwitt from HowardStern.com called in to make sure he gets things right on there. He read off all of the stunts and made sure he had the details correct. Doug was saying that they could have the wheel up as an option but Howard didn't want to do that so they're just going to let the audience vote on the gross stuff they had already.
Another Philly caller told Will that he'd better not show his face in Philly again if he does this stuff. Eddie the Produce Guy called in and said that he would be willing to bust a nut on Will's foot. He said he'd even slap his penis across his face if they wanted. Will said he doesn't want that ugly penis even near his face.
Howard took a bunch more phone calls and let the fans go off on all of these guys. Siobahn called in and said that Mike's stunt was ''pretty awesome'' and she'd be totally into that. The Howard TV guys showed video of Siobahn from her apartment playing with herself. Richard said that Siobahn likes to eat cat food and likes to walk around her apartment eating Whiskas cat food. She said she likes it and it's cheap so that's why she eats that stuff.
Siobahn said that if Richard went ahead and banged her, he'd probably win the TV. Richard said he's no going there and he'd take his chances with the shit on his chest. Artie asked Richard if his life depended on it, would he fuck Siobahn or Sal. Richard said he'd probably go with Siobahn. He apologized to Sal for the choice.
Artie said he'd be willing to go see ''The Devil Wears Prada'' for that TV. That would be out of character for him. Howard took some more phone calls and let some people suggest some more stuff. He then went over the list of stunts and said that people will be able to vote on HowardStern.com for the one they want to hear happen.
The guys spent some time waiting for someone to jump in and add stuff to their stunts but not much was happening. Will said he'd take piss on his foot but that didn't seem to help much. Mike asked for a drum roll and said that he was willing to let Crazy Alice sit on his face. That didn't fly so they suggested Rappin Granny or Blue Iris... or Buck Angel. Howard told him to stick to Siobahn.
Artie threw out a ''I'll blow Ferrall!'' but he was just joking. Howard closed out the suggestions a short time after that and said that the audience now has the vote. He said this whole contest shows just how great a Panasonic TV really is. He went to commercial break after that.
Howard and Robin talked about what a phony announcement that was and how they should have said what they were really thinking. Robin got back to her news after that.
Gary came in a short time later and said that People magazine has posted an article about Star Jones saying that she came off the show and claimed that she feels that she was fired because her contract was not renewed for a 10th season. Howard and the guys wondered why she wouldn't say that on the air at the show. She pretended like she was quitting while making that speech of hers, then she runs off to People and claims that she feels she was fired.
Robin finished up her news and Howard ended the show around 11:55am.
Howard said he sometimes thinks about changing the opening to the show because there are some debates about the song being too much. He said he has the same debate with himself sometimes. Fred said that the song is supposed to wake you up so it should stay. Howard asked him when he woke up because he was very talkative this morning. Fred was saying that he likes to hear music that pumps in the morning so that's why he likes that song.
Howard said that Crazy Alice has a bug up her ass about Ralph now. He played a voice mail she left recently where she went off on Ralph about The Friday Show. She called him names and goofed on his looks saying that he doesn't like pussy and stuff like that.
After playing that clip Howard played some prank calls that they made using Crazy Alice audio clips. They had her asking a woman ''Who's 'dis?'' and pissing her off. He also played the song parody where Alice calls Howard a Chicken bone neck, cock sucking Jew. Artie said that song will wake people up filled with all of that hate.
Howard played another quick Alice song parody and then took a phone call from a guy who said he was checking out one of those Chloroform movies that Howard ''recommended'' yesterday. Howard told him he didn't recommend anything, he just mentioned that he had them to watch.
Artie was singing the Crazy Alice ''Chicken bone neck'' song parody and the lyrics were pretty crazy so Howard played a little bit of it to see if he was singing them right... but he didn't make it through the whole thing.
Bong Hit Bill called in and said he finally got to see the Artie Roast on Howard TV and it was great. Howard asked him if he liked the roast or the behind-the-scenes special about the roast. Bill said he thought the back stage stuff was completely nuts so he liked that.
Howard said he does understand Rush not wanting to have his name on the prescription bottle like he was claiming. He said the guy is just a tool though and he's a big phony.
Howard also brought up a picture that's in the paper where they show President Bush jogging with a guy who has no legs. He and Robin talked about that for a short time and then Fred played some phony Rush Limbaugh statements that they made up using clips from his audio book.
Howard wondered if Rush has the right to have a prescription for Viagra without his name on it. He said he's got the lamest arrest record getting held up for the Viagra and, in the past, for Oxycontin. The guys wondered why he would carry the Viagra around in the bottle when he could stick it in a tissue and hide it that way. Robin said that you have to have the prescription bottle to prove you have a prescription so that's why he'd need to have the bottle.
Howard said to forget that case and just think about Rush walking around all fat with a boner from the Viagra. He was very disturbed thinking about that.
Now Barbara Walters is in a rage over the whole thing, but not on the show. She's saying that she was blind sided and betrayed by Star after she quit the view and then claimed that she was fired. Howard aids that this could have made for great TV if they had done all of this on the air.
Howard read some stuff that Barbara was saying in an article and wondered why they're doing all of this stuff in interviews instead of doing it on the air. Barbara is saying that it's ABC that didn't renew her contract, not the show. It's ABC who employs her according to Barbara.
Howard read some stuff about Rosie O'Donnell coming in to replace Meredith Viera on The View later this year. There was also some discussions about Star Jones taking free gifts from sponsors on the show and using some of that stuff for her wedding.
Howard replayed the clip of Star Jones announcing her leaving the show and wondered why she didn't come out with all of that stuff on the air. He said that they're saying that Star won't be back today because the network kicked her out after the comments she made.
Howard said he loves this whole story and how everyone is melting down. Gary said he would have loved to have seen Star Jones and Rosie O'Donnell doing the show together. Artie said he would almost watch the show if all of this stuff came out on the air. Howard was being driven nuts just thinking about how everyone is lying on that show.
The BET Awards came up after that. He and Robin spent a minute talking about that show and playing some clips where the stars brought up stuff they wanted to plug. Howard played a clip of Snoop Dogg introducing an award and calling Ice Cube ''my nig.'' Howard said he doesn't believe that those guys really talk like that all the time.
The band Outkast was getting in plugs for their new album and for a movie they have coming out around the same time. Howard asked Robin if she ever feels pressured to speak like that. She said she doesn't feel that way but she knows of people who do. She said she's seen people taking on a real black ''girlfriend'' type of act that they put on in front of certain people.
Howard said he used to talk black back when he was living in Roosevelt, Long Island. He said he was probably the original wigger talking the way he did back there. Robin said that there are people who speak like that who she would call ''professional black people'' who speak like that only when they feel it's needed.
Howard played some more clips from the BET awards where some guys were talking about being from the West Coast and how that's the best. Howard wondered where that comes from and why it matters where they're from. JD said that some guys actually go as far as to brag about the zip code they're from.
Howard replayed the Crazy Alice ''Who's 'dis'' prank call he played earlier. He let a fart rip while that clip was playing and told Artie that it really stinks. He said the food he eats is what makes them smell so bad. He was up really early in the morning starving but he figured it would be best not to eat.
Howard said he's like the only person he knows who doesn't watch ''Entourage'' but he saw the first two shows and didn't like it so he gave up. He said that Spike TV is doing a ''Blade'' series that starts tonight. He said they got a guy who looks like Wesley Snipes except a shade lighter. He said the show is getting good reviews. He said he'll watch anything vampire related.
Artie said that some fans think that Ralph knows something about that part of his life and that's why he keeps giving him jobs. Howard said that's not the case, he really thinks that he's good on The Friday Show. Howard said he was picking up everything from cocktail waitresses on up.
Howard went into a place to buy a chair one time and the chick in there was really hot. The chick came running up to him and offered him her number. He didn't say a word to her before that. He told her that he wasn't going to be that forward. She said she'd give him her number if he promised to call her. He took her number and never called her even though he promised to. The designer he had with him was looking at him like he was disgusting.
The woman who called in, Gouda, wanted to know what it was about Beth that made him stop dating. Howard said he was pretty sure after he met her that he wasn't going to date anyone else. He said she was very beautiful and he really cared about being with her. He said the more he was with her the more he wanted to be with her so he didn't want to risk losing her.
Benjy asked Howard how many chicks he was with before Beth after his divorce. He thought about that for a short time and said that it was about 25 women. That was within 6 months. He said that his relationship with Beth has actually gotten better over the past few months. They've been getting along very well and have a lot of fun together.
Howard talked about how he never talked to the girls about keeping their relationships quiet but he's pretty sure that they were so embarrassed by it that they would never talk about it in public. There was one woman who he was having sex with when his condom slipped off. He said he dropped a full load into her and she went right out and got the morning after pill to make sure she didn't have any kids. He thought that was really cool on her part.
Gouda on the phone asked if Howard found it odd that there were no reports about any of his other dates before Beth. Howard said there were some little reports but he kept them pretty secret. He didn't even introduce the women to his kids. Gouda brought up Mike Walker and asked if he thinks he would have brought that up in his column. Howard said Mike really doesn't out people like that and he probably wouldn't have said anything even if he did know something.
Benjy brought up an event back at K-Rock where Howard got really pissed off about something that was going on there and he ended up throwing a book in the studio. Howard said he gets very upset when he feels the show is being messed with. He has been able to control his anger over the past few years though so things have settled down for him.
King of All Blacks called in and asked Howard if there's anything about Beth that he doesn't like. Howard said there are some things. He said that when they start talking about certain things she will clam up on him and that makes him mental. He said they may talk about their families and she'll withdraw from the conversation. She's not confrontational and she won't get into certain discussions. That was just a fake scenario that he was giving to King, it's not something they argue about.
Howard said that last night he was talking to Beth about the time she got a massage and had a woman putting her hand on her vagina. She added a few new details to the story and he asked her to show her exactly how that woman put her hand on her but she wouldn't do it. That made him nuts and he just wants her to comply with his wishes. He said she didn't but he banged her anyway because she makes him so horny.
Howard said that massage story makes him nuts because he really doesn't know what happened because Beth isn't giving him all of the details. Howard told King that he had to get going but King mentioned a hot chick who does morning news on NBC there in New York. Her name was Darlene Rodriguez. Howard said he doesn't watch the local news anymore but he does like