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Howard sang along with the Animals song ''We Gotta Get Out of This Place'' as he was starting the show off. He then went on to talk about the 60 Minutes interview that aired last night but the only part he remembered was the huge mass of food Artie had on his desk in the back of the studio. They didn't interview him at all but they got a shot of all of that food. Howard said that Artie was worried that they'd show him eating all of that stuff. They didn't do that but they did show the pile of stuff he keeps back there. Robin said she missed that part so she'll have to go back and take a look at it. Artie said that they did have a camera close up on his face but that's what they chose to show.
A woman called in and asked Howard why the show wasn't more about him. She thought it was going to be the whole 60 Minutes show. Howard went on to talk about how good he thought the piece was an dhow they didn't bash him during the interview like some shows do. The interview may not have been long enough according to the woman on the phone. Gary thought that it was the long piece that Ruth had told them about last week but Howard said that wasn't the case. He said he'd like to show the rest of the tape they have on his Howard Stern On Demand channel but he's no sure if that will ever happen.
Howard talked about the interviews he was doing over the weekend and how he spent about 7 hours in a hotel room doing that. As he was talking about that the woman on the phone interrupted him asking for a free radio. Howard hung up on her. He went on to talk about a New York Post article where they showed a preview picture of him for an upcoming magazine article and how pissed he was when he saw the write up in the Post. He was obsessing on that stuff because they made it seem like he's just going to do a filth fest when he goes over to SIRIUS.
Howard was also saying that Bill was asking him about his Hollywood friends. That's when Howard noticed his 5 pounds of makeup and all of the people who were hanging around with him. Bill was also goofing on him about going to Nobu so Howard asked him if he ever goes to a nice restaurant. Bill said that he never goes to places like that so Howard eventually figured out that he's trying to be a ''regular guy'' like one of the people who listens to him. Howard said that O'Reilly probably makes like $75 million a year doing that show of his so there's no way he's a regular guy. He said he seems to be ashamed of his money. Howard also heard that O'Reilly doesn't have a regular house like he claims he does, he's got a really nice layout in Manhasset.
Howard said the entire interview he did with Bill was actually very good and he wasn't trying to bash the guy. He did ask Bill about the junk he sells on his web site though. He wanted to know why he puts his name on all of that junk and sells it to his fans. Bill claims that he donates the money he makes from that to charity. Howard wonders why he doesn't just take some of his own money and donate it instead of selling crap to his fans.
Howard took a call from a guy who told Howard he looked pretty good on the 60 Minutes interview. That led to the guys talking about how bad Howard has looked in the past during interviews and how good he looked last night. Howard said he's got a good side and a bad side and they just happened to get a good angle during some of the shoot. He thought that he looked really bad in some of the shots but there was some footage where he looked okay.
Howard and the guys talked about his childhood house in Roosevelt, Long Island and how disoriented he looked when he visited the house with Ed Bradley. Howard said he really liked the way they did that interview and how they didn't try to bash him in any way. They did what they said they were going to do and it turned out to be a great piece.
The caller Howard had on the line said that he liked that we got another look at our friend Howard Stern. Artie started to laugh after hearing that. Howard didn't understand why he was laughing though. The caller was being honest about what he thought about the piece.
Gary said that he was down in Atlantic City until last night and had to ask a friend about how much time he got on the show. He was only on for a few seconds and the footage they put on was where Sal was holding a banana over his head. He also said that he's been with the show for 21 years and if he knew that all he had to do to get on the show was knock over a stack of carts, he would have done that. Sal did that to Jason and they actually had footage of that during the 60 Minutes interview.
Sal was telling Howard how great that interview was last night so the phone caller told Sal that he's gay and looks like Freddy Mercury from Queen. He then told Howard how good he and Robin looked on the show last night. Howard almost broke down and cried during the 60 Minutes interview so Robin asked him who he was thinking about when that happened. Howard told the guys that he was probably thinking more about Fred than anyone else.
Howard talked about how the 60 Minutes people wanted to interview his parents but that's been done in the past and he kind of kept them from doing it again.
Howard will be walking his stuff from the old studio to the new one but Tom won't let them broadcast that. He would like to hold a party for the fans after that and he'd like to broadcast that as well but Tom will probably tell them that it's too much promotion for the new place.
Gary told Howard that they do have some money to give away on that final show. He said that he will just hand it out to someone he thinks has a great sign or something like that. He hasn't really decided on what to do with that yet. He's also thinking about throwing a concert together or something like that. He had to take a break after talking about that.
A caller told Howard that he's out in Vegas and he couldn't be more disconnected from him unless he was dead. Howard told him to come down on the 16th to hang out with them. Howard said he's heard from just about every strip club in the country and they're all sending strippers down for the show.
Cliff Palette called in and told Howard he'd like to come down so Howard told him to come on down. Cliff said that he needs a place to stay so Howard asked Richard if he could stay with him. Richard said he thought those strippers from last week were going to stay with him. He doesn't know Cliff all that well and he's not sure he'd want him sleeping in the bed with him. Richard said he'd find a place for him. Howard told Robin to put him up because she has multiple homes. She said that Howard has much more square footage than she does.
Howard told Robin that she could have an extra man in the house just in case she gets horny if Cliff stayed with her. She's not into that though. No one was jumping on this offer like they did last week when the strippers called in. Howard asked Artie if he'd have him over. Artie said that he guesses he could stay over at his place if he really had to. Artie offered to get him a hotel room instead. Cliff thought that sounded pretty good but Howard told him not to pay for a hotel room, someone will let him stay at their place.
Tom Chiusano apparently offered to put him up in a hotel room so Howard said that might work. Cliff was telling Howard about how he saw the ''Chicken Minutes'' interview last night so the guys were goofing on him a little bit about the way he was saying ''60 Minutes.''
Howard took a call from a guy who was offering a place for Cliff to stay but he ended up cursing so they had to hit the delay on him. Howard let that guy go because they had a hotel room for Cliff already.
Howard talked about some of the other coverage in 60 Minutes last night about the Bird Flu. Howard said he noticed that they were pulling the feathers out of the birds when they were still alive. He said he felt really bad after seeing that.
Riley Martin called in and told Howard how great his interview was last night. He was also telling Howard that he and his alien friends were watching the interview together since he may be working with Howard over at the new place. Riley was also telling Howard that he might be coming down to the city on the 16th to see everyone on the final show.
Howard let Riley go a short time later and played one of the prank calls they made using clips of Riley. They called a home and had him telling the people that he's a friend of the aliens and offering to take them on a space voyage.
Howard played another prank call where they called Riley and told him that they were aliens calling him to let him know that they'd decided that he wasn't the best representative for them. Howard played a couple more Riley clips and a clip of Cliff Pallete singing.
Sal the Stockbroker created a special clip featuring clips of the guys on the show yelling at each other. Howard played that as they were going to commercial break.
Howard was goofing on Artie a little bit about not being into the whole electronics world. He has a TiVo but it's in his closet. His computer has been ''broken'' for the past 4 months and he barely knows how to use his cell phone. Artie said he really wants to learn how to do the whole e-mail thing and stuff like that and that will be his new years resolution. The guys spent a couple of minutes on that before Shuli called in.
Shuli suggested that Howard get Joey Boots on the new ''Meet the Shrink'' show that they have on Howard 100. Howard mentioned the show but Tom hit the delay on it since he's not supposed to be promoting upcoming stuff. They tried to have a discussion about that but the delay was hit a few times. Howard tried to get in another plug for the show but Tom dumped out of each mention of the new show.
Howard said he's doing an interview with The Daily Show on Tuesday, then he's shooting the Best Damn Sports Show on the 14th. Then he takes a week off during December and then has a bunch of other interviews the week after that. He'll also be preparing his new show over at SIRIUS that week.
Howard asked him what his favorite interview was out of the 14 years he's been doing this stuff. Garver said that the OJ Simpson interview he did was his favorite. He's done a couple of interviews with OJ but the one where he got OJ out on the golf course was the best. Howard played a clip of that interview where OJ and his buddies got pissed at him bothering them out on the course. Garver says they did $15,000 worth of damage to their camera that day. The guys had some fun listening to the interview again and goofed on OJ a bit.
Howard asked Gary (Baba Booey) which Garver interview was his favorite. Gary said that it had to be the interview he got with Joe Pesci. Pesci was a good sport and stuck through the whole interview where Garver was asking him all kinds of questions about sex and other stuff. Howard said they can't get guests like that so they have to send people like Gary out to interview them.
Baba Booey told Howard to play the Leon Spinks interview that Garver got. That's another classic one that will never be heard again. In the clip Spinks answers questions but you can barely understand what he's saying. Artie was laughing his ass off as he heard the interview. He said the whole thing was funny because Garver mispronounced the word sphincter. Artie had never heard the interview before so he was laughing so hard that he was about to puke.
Howard thanked Garver for everything he's done for them. Garver said that it's been a lot of fun. Howard told him to come on down on the 16th to say goodbye to the fans. He's also trying to get him a job at SIRIUS. Howard was going to go to break so Baba Booey requested one more classic interview that Garver did with George Takei. Howard played that as they were going to commercial. There were a lot of laughs they pulled from that interview that they still play today.
Howard mentioned that he would be giving out money on the final show and that was courtesy of SpikeTV. He said that the final show should be like the book signings he's done in the past where the fans all get together and have a big party. He took a call from a woman who said that she was going to be flying out on the 15th to be there for the final show. Howard said that this is the end of his terrestrial radio show so it is a big deal for his fans.
What Howard wanted to do was move the big stuff out of his studio on that day and pull it up the block to the new studio. Tom doesn't want him to do that stuff on the air so it may happen after the show. He said he's thinking about moving the stuff a block and then hand it off to another celebrity who could walk it another block. It would be like the Olympic Torch run where they pass it off to the next person all the way to the new place. They could end up passing it along to High Pitch Eric or something like that.
Howard said he really wants to have his parents say a few words to the fans and have Staind perform for the fans as well. Gary said they're renting a 30 foot long float for the band to play from so that may be where the other people do their thing.
Wendy the Retard called in and told Howard about watching 60 Minutes last night so he asked her how long the show was. She said it was about an hour and a half. She also thought that there are 30 minutes in an hour. Howard spent a couple of minutes talking to her about coming down for the final show. Wendy said she and her mom will drive up there since they don't fly. Wendy said her mother doesn't like flying so they always drive to places like that. Howard played some clips of Wendy singing before letting her go.
Dan the Farter called in and said that he'd love to come down and fart for them to get them one last FCC fine. Howard was also thinking that they could remake the classic song with The Losers from the Magic Johnson show where they performed Wipe Out and have Dan fart those parts where they had farting.
Howard said that they can have people going up on stage that day and saying a few words every few minutes. The day could wrap up with Howard and The Losers performing Wipe Out. They were even giving Artie the chance to play an instrument with them since he's been kicked out of the band in the past.
Richard came in and asked if he could play with The Losers. At first Howard said he could but then thought about how the name of the band came about and it was all due to Scott the Engineer. They might not let Richard play since Scott was their original drummer.
Howard read a letter he got from someone who offered to help them out with decorating. He told Gary to get in touch with that guy and set that up. There was also a letter from Bruce from World Video who said that they have a new contract girl who would be willing to stay in a room with a fan.
Sal came in and said that he was thinking of playing a New York version of BANGO on that final day. Howard said he'll think about that since they already have a girl lined up. Howard got back to the 60 Minutes discussion and talked about how there are some people who are thinking that the stuff that was said about his parents during the segment might have offended them. Howard said they were fine with it and thought it was a good interview. He said he spoke to his parents after the segment ran and everyone was happy.
Artie announced that he had to get going because one of his great uncles (Frankie Manto) passed away and he had to run off to the funeral. He ran off at about 10:45. As he was running out Howard asked him to show them what's in his brief case. Artie said he just brings his newspaper and stuff like that in the brief case. Howard said it's bright orange and sticks out. Howard let Artie go after that.
Howard got a letter from Yucko the Clown who wondered if it was okay to come by on the final show. He was left out somehow but Gary said he'll make sure he's on the list.
Howard got his girlfriend on the phone to help them figure out what the name of Britney Spears and Kevin Federline's kid was. She knew that it was Preston but that it wasn't the first name. Ronnie came in and said that it's actually Sean Preston. She was also helping them figure out some other names. She got in a plug for her North Shore Animal League calendar which is available at NSALAmerica.org or through BethO.com (link removed, do not visit).
Howard and Beth went through some other celebrity kid names and some celebrity names like Christina Aguilera's new husband and stuff like that. They were all quizzing each other about names. Gary was handed a list of celebrity names so he read them off and goofed on some of them.
Howard said that poor Beth had to deal with him during his neurotic day yesterday because he was so worried about the 60 Minutes thing. He was all pissed off about the picture of him that ended up in the NY Post over the weekend. He was also talking about his dinner out with Beth on Saturday night. He said that he had a great dinner with Beth around 6, got home around 7 and went to bed. He couldn't fall asleep so he was up reading Star magazine and watching Batman Begins. He wrapped up the call with Beth a short time later because he had to take a break.
Bobo called in a short time later and asked if he was on that list. Gary told him it's a list in progress so he'll be on there. Howard and Bobo spent a few seconds talking about the 60 Minutes interview. That led to Gary talking about Sal saying an off color joke about Ed Bradley when they went out to lunch the other day. He told the story but Howard didn't think he told it right so he got goofed on a little bit about that.
Howard thought he had Eric the Midget on the phone but there was no one there when he picked up. Howard ended up playing an Eric the Midget prank phone call instead. In the call they took clips of Eric demanding to meet Kelly Clarkson and called a pizza place. The woman who answered the phone was yelling at Eric about what he was saying to her. Howard also played the gay porn clip they created using clips of Eric the Midget.
Howard said that there are only 9 shows left after tomorrow but it hasn't hit him yet that it's almost over. He doesn't think that he'll break down for the final show but anything is possible. A listener called in and said that the 60 Minutes thing was fine until he almost broke down and cried. Howard said he lucked out and didn't actually shed any tears. Ed Bradley saved him from crying but did point out that he was getting very emotional.
Howard said that Gary took the kids out to get a Christmas tree. They went to a place where you cut down your own tree. Gary said that they went to a place about 45 minutes from home and explained how they had to hike around to find the tree that you want and then cut it down with the saw they provided. Gary said he let the kids saw a little bit and get nowhere. He got the tree cut down and then the kids asked him to make them ''hockey pucks'' out of the stump. He was all worn out from cutting down the tree and wore himself out even more cutting the hockey pucks.
Gary went on to tell the story about how he had to drag this tree to the side of the road and it was really heavy. Then it was taken back to where he had to pay for it. He paid for the tree and asked if there was anyone to help load it on the car. He tried to put it on his roof but it was so heavy that he dropped it. The second time he lifted it the tree knocked him in the face. He finally got it up the car and had it backwards. Someone had pointed that out to him so he flipped it around and got it tied to the car.
Howard pointed out that Gary used to get laid like crazy years ago and now he's cutting down Christmas trees and dragging them all over the place. Howard told him that he could have just gone out and purchased a tree close to home that was already cut down. Gary said he kind of likes doing stuff like that most of the time but it wasn't so easy this time.
Gary said he was all pissed off after having trouble with the tree so he and his wife got into an argument. His son Lucas wouldn't get in the car so he lost his temper with the kid. His wife told the ''guys'' to calm down but Gary went off on her saying that he's an adult and Lucas is a kid so she shouldn't tell him to calm down.
Gary said he hasn't spoken to his wife since the fight over the weekend but he figures he'll go home today and make up with her. He said they really haven't had a fight in about a year and a half. Gary said that his wife has been helping him out with a lot of stuff including buying gifts for everyone on the show. Gary said that the gift he's getting for Howard is still in London. He lost $2,200 on the gift he tried to buy on eBay recently so he had to buy it somewhere else and it's not readily available.
Ralph mentioned some of the stuff that went on during the interview and how he thought that Howard had let him off the hook too easy. They got back into the discussion Howard had earlier in the morning about Bill calling him out on going to eat at Nobu and having a really nice home while he tried to keep a ''regular'' house. He went through that story again and Robin told him that Howard 100 News should be trying to find out just what kind of house Bill really lives in since he claims to just live in an average home like his listeners do.
Howard thinks the interview went pretty well and it was a good interview. Bill asked him about the satellite thing and that's what he wanted. Ralph told him that he won't like it after he sees it because they had bad lighting on him. Howard wondered why he didn't say something if he noticed the lighting was bad. Ralph didn't think it would help because they had everything set up already. Ralph said he tried to say something to the staff there but they weren't too responsive. Howard told him he should have whispered in his ear if that's what he saw.
Howard went off on Ralph a little bit about not helping him out by telling him he looked bad that day. He said that Ralph should have some kind of signal to tell him when he looks bad so he knows that the lighting should be changed. He had to take another break a short time later.
Robin started her news after that. They spent a few minutes talking about the death of John Lennon during the news since the anniversary of his death is coming up this week. Double A called in and told Howard how great the 60 Minutes interview was. He said he was very proud to be part of the show after seeing that interview last night.
Howard said he heard that Tom Chiusano had to go down to the parking garage to buy David Lee Roth a parking space in the parking garage for his bicycle. The bike wasn't allowed up to the station the other day and there was apparently a big fight about the whole thing so Tom had to buy the parking space. Howard also said he heard that some of the guys at the station wanted to throw Dave out the window when that came up. He's turning out to be pretty high maintenance already and he hasn't even started airing his show yet. Howard hears all of the gossip there at the station.
Someone sent in a letter about how K-Rock, his current employer, has pulled him off of their web site (KRockRadio.com) already even though he's still got a few weeks left on the air. He wasn't aware of that and figures that the building they work in probably isn't being called The Howard Stern Building anymore either. (Howard was still on K-Rock's web site when I checked around 10:55am). Howard ended the show around 11:00am.
Howard's first words were something like ''...cause I'll walk out of here...'' He said that he was still upset about stuff that's going on there and he's still got his rash that was all itchy this morning. He said he's been to the doctor for it and they gave him some shots to ease the itching.
Howard heard that Gary was in a fight with Richie the engineer because they were apparently in the studio working with power tools to get the studio ready for David Lee Roth. Howard doesn't want to work in the studio if it's all dusty and dirty.
Gary came in and said that he was working in his office yesterday and his wall was vibrating. He figured they were working in the studio so he went in and saw them sawing the wall away. Howard said they've had discussions about this already and thought that they understood that they weren't going to be doing construction while they're still working there. Gary said that Richie told him they were just cutting a peep hole in the wall, not doing construction.
Howard said that he's not going to work in there if they're doing construction and if they want to do that, they have to fire him and get him out of there. David Lee Roth is already causing an uproar and he's not even a radio star yet. Gary said they did a similar thing with Soupy Sales when WNBC fired Howard and hired Soupy. They gave Soupy a huge office which Howard didn't have when he was there.
Howard and the guys were talking about radio studios and how you really don't need all that much to decorate. He thinks that they're doing this to get back at him over his leaving. He said that Gary talked to Tom about what was going on and Tom apparently didn't know what was going on. He stopped the construction though. Howard isn't even sure why Tom is still there trying to start a new morning radio show. He said he probably won't admit it but he doesn't want the aggravation.
Gary thinks that Tom Chiusano's hair has gotten grayer in the past month because of the pressure he's under. Tom came in so Howard told him that he really should just get out of there because he appears to be falling apart. Tom said he's got a cold that won't go away but other than that, he's fine. He also told Howard that Richie sealed up the hole and vacuumed up the mess he'd made. There was also talk of creating a new studio for Roth because the board that Howard uses was made specifically for him.
The guys were talking about the hosts that are going to be using the studio once Howard leaves. They have David Lee Roth in the morning, no one set for mid-day yet, Penn Jillette from 2-3 in the afternoon, the Radio Chick from 3-7 and Booker from 7-11. Tom said that some of them are going to be using the same studio as Roth.
Yesterday Howard talked about a story he heard about David Lee Roth getting a parking space for his bicycle and that Tom had to shell out the money for that. Tom said he doesn't know where he gets his information but he didn't have to shell out the money. Roth will be riding his bicycle to work though and he does need some place to keep the bike.
Howard was looking directly at Benjy because someone had taken down his piece of cardboard that blocks his view. That led to him talking about how they had a meeting last week in the studio and had two people pop up from in the back. It turned out to be two interns who were doing inventory on his carts. They didn't let anyone know they were in there for about a half hour. Howard said he was shocked when he saw them just pop up from nowhere. He said he now wants all interns wearing bells so he can hear them at all times.
Howard heard that Tom was freaking out when he heard about the leak about the parking space. There are 50 million people walking around the station and the stories spread quickly.
Howard said the picture they used on the cover is peculiar and he thinks that it's obvious that they were trying to use something that was going to irritate him. It's nice that he's getting publicity but that photo is bothering him.
Howard told Robin that he likes the Esquire magazine article and the Newsweek article that's out now. He talked about the photo shoot he did for Newsweek and how they had him dressed in a Cub Scout uniform. That's the one picture they used and that was kind of strange.
The 60 Minutes interview is on the 60 Minutes web site and they have some footage that didn't make it to the air on Sunday night. Howard said there's a bunch of cool stuff in there and he's wondering if they could put it up on his Howard Stern On Demand channel. That led to him reading an memo he got about the ratings that 60 Minutes got during his segment on Sunday night. The preliminary ratings showed that there were 17.8 million viewers that night. The guys talked about how 60 Minutes should put out a special where they feature more footage from that interview.
Howard said that someone on the Roundtable show congratulated him on getting a fair piece out of the 60 Minutes people. He thinks that's why the 60 Minutes people are good because they don't always do what you expect them to do.
Gary said that someone prank called Jeff the Drunk the other day and told him that he was banned from the show. The person who called claimed to be a representative of George Lopez so it was an obvious goof but Jeff thought it was real. Howard played a voice mail that Jeff left for Gary where Jeff was just about in tears not knowing what to do. Howard mentioned that Jeff would be doing the Meet the Shrink show sometime but didn't want to pre-promote it because they don't want him doing that there. He had to take a break a short time later.
Jeff the Drunk was on the phone so Howard and Robin asked him who was performing the ''Tweet, tweets'' on his cover of ''Rockin' Robin.'' Jeff said it was some chick. The guys asked him if he got paid to do the album. He said he got paid a little bit but not all that much. Howard said he'll probably never get paid. Howard also talked to him about how gullible the guy is, referring to the George Lopez thing they talked about a little earlier.
Mariann from Brooklyn called in and said she had a lot of fun at the Roundtable thing the other night. She also said that Jeff the Drunk was calling her all weekend to talk about getting kicked off the show. She was going on and on about Howard's final show and stuff like that so he had to hang up on her. He quickly spoke to Jeff the Drunk again about the Meet the Shrink show that he's going to be part of later tonight on Howard 100.
Dave thanked Howard for the 13 years of service that he's put in for them. He said that he's helped make them what they are today there at WNCX and he really appreciates it. Dave also told Howard that his favorite moment was the funeral they did out there in Cleveland. He said it was the first time he'd ever seen Howard live and it was amazing to watch.
Howard thanked Dave for what he's done and Dave thanked him right back for what he's done. He told Dave to come out to New York for the final show so Dave said he'd see what he could do. Howard let him go and went to break a short time later.
Howard said he did an interview the other day and on his way there, he read a term paper that a student wrote about the history of his show. The FCC used to send back letters to people who would complain that they only had control over the seven dirty words. Then in 1987 a woman from New Jersey wrote a letter to the FCC that made them change their tune. The FCC fined the show for a Christmas show they did where a guy played the piano with his genitals. It was funny but it wasn't even something they could see, it was only on radio being described. The first fine was for $6,000 and that's where the show took a turn. That's when the whole industry should have been outraged and started to fight back against the FCC.
Tom came in and said he remembers that morning because he saw the piano player seeing the guy preparing to play by looking at a Playboy magazine and messing with himself. Howard said that his lobby used to be crazy with people like that all over the place. Howard went on to talk about how that really was the beginning of the end of the show. He used to be able to do stuff like that and it was no big deal. Now the FCC goes after them for the most ridiculous things. He said he had to start editing himself over the years and stopped doing certain things on the show because of it. Once he moves to the new place, he'll be able to get back to doing that type of thing again.
Howard thinks that the interviewer for New York Magazine did a really good job and he'd like to play back the tape of the interview he did with the guy because he thought it was so good. He isn't sure why New York Magazine put that horrible picture of him on their cover but the article worked out well. Howard brought up his Newsweek article and talked about how strange it was that they used the picture of him in the cub scout uniform after taking a bunch of photos.
Howard said he was offered the chance to go see a screening of King Kong this week but he's not sure if he has time to watch a 3 hour movie. He's also not sure he wants to go to a theater where people cough and sneeze all over him.
Howard took a call from Sim who gave him another celebrity baby name to add to what they were talking about yesterday. He said that Soleil Moon Frye's baby's name is Poet Sienna Rose Goldberg. He was also talking about how inspired he is by Howard doing the show as long as he has.
Howard played a promo from Wendy the Retard where she talks about heading up to New York for the final show on December 16th. He went on to talk about all of the people who will be heading up for that final show. The guys were talking about the gathering that they'll have there on 57th street. Gary said that they're working on all of that and they're going to have Staind performing The Beetlejuice Song for the crowd. He said they've also agreed to play people on and off stage the whole morning. The band is also going to send out e-mail to their fans letting them know where they'll be playing that morning.
Howard is thinking of reuniting the Backside Boys on that final day to perform one of their gay songs. Will Murray came in and said that he's spoken to a few hot chicks who will be coming down that day. He said that Victoria Zdrok, Courtney Cums and Tera Patrick will all be there. Howard said he read something disturbing about Taylor Rain. He said that she has announced that she's not going to appear in front of the camera anymore and will be starting a family. She'll also be directing movies instead of appearing in them. Howard was kind of upset to read that but Gary thinks that she'll be back.
High Pitch Eric called in and told Howard that the Katie Couric interview was on The Today Show as he was talking and it was really good. Howard said that he has something that he wants to mail out to his fans through his web site. He said he's not sure he can even talk about it though so he dropped the subject.
A phone caller told Howard that he got his ''Eh, Ehh, Ehh'' radio a few months ago and he's ready for him to move over there. The guy was also telling Howard that he should get some of his classic advertisers to help him out at the new place. Howard said that he will have some commercials on his channel at the new place.
Artie said that Benjy is one of those guys who will eat and eat if someone brings in certain types of food. Benjy said he's under some stress so that could be part of his problem. Howard wanted to get out of the conversation a short time later saying that Benjy really doesn't have anything to say and he doesn't cooperate when he asks him questions. Benjy was unable to remember what he ate for a few minutes. He eventually remembered that he had some peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and a can of soup. He said it was probably 3 sandwiches on top of the soup.
Gary asked Benjy if he ate desert but Benjy's answer wasn't quick enough for them and they wanted to get out of the conversation again. Sal brought in a scale so they could weigh him. Fred said that Benjy is so wide that you can't walk down the hall past him. The guys were trying to guess his weight before he got on it. The guys guessed:
Vinnie Favale from CBS was there so they had him come in to get weighed. Vinnie took his shoes off and hopped on the scale. He came in at 215 pounds. Vinnie wanted Howard to get on the scale as well. Howard went over and got on to prove that he's less than Vinnie. Gary set the scale for 195 and he was only one pound heavier at 196. Jason was called in too because he's gained a lot of weight. Sal said he looks like one of those bodies floating down in New Orleans. Gary set the scale and found that Jason was at 254 pounds! He's 5'10'' tall. Howard said that Jason looked fat on 60 Minutes the other night. Jason says he knows he has to lose weight and he'll be able to do that on his own.
Howard asked Vinnie if he's going to be able to call in to his new show when he moves. Vinnie said that he's not sure because it was one thing to be working for the same company (Viacom) but now it's going to be two different companies.
Vinnie and Howard talked about the ratings for his radio show and for the 60 Minutes show that aired on Sunday night. Howard said that 60 Minutes should put out more footage from that interview because it was so interesting. Vinnie wondered if Howard would want to put it out on DVD. Howard thought about it but he doesn't want to charge his fans for stuff like that. He had to take a break a short time later.
Howard said he should have just picked Katie Couric up and banged her. Robin asked Vinnie if it's true that Katie is coming over to CBS. He said she'd be great if she came over and they'd be ''so young'' if she came over.
Howard and Vinnie were talking about the In Demand show that Howard has now. Vinnie said he'd like to see them running a loop of previews of the show so he'd know that new stuff was on. He wasn't getting his point across very well because Howard didn't seem to understand what he was talking about. Howard told Vinnie that eventually everything will be an On Demand program so people won't have to watch them at regular times. Vinnie is impressed that they have so much available but he wants some help figuring out what's new.
Howard wanted to get to Vinnie's favorite moment but he was talking about other things. Vinnie went on to explain how great it's been to have him there working for the same company but things are going to change. Artie said he doesn't think that Howard will remain friends with Vinnie after they leave but Howard said that's not true. He will be Vinnie's friend even after he leaves. Vinnie said he will still call in once in a while but things will be different.
Doug Goodstein from In Demand called in and asked Vinnie what he was talking about with the On Demand thing. He told Vinnie that the whole idea of having Howard's stuff On Demand is that you can watch it whenever you want to watch it. Howard thought that Vinnie was trying to defend regular TV by saying that he wants to know a schedule for new programming. Vinnie said he just wants more of an explanation of what's new. Doug said they have a new program of previously unseen Jeff the Drunk footage that will be available starting today, or later this evening.
Bobo called in and asked Vinnie about Beth being let go from Letterman's show after she started dating Howard. Vinnie swears that they didn't let her go because of her dating Howard, they just didn't need her anymore. Howard told him that Beth told him that they replaced her with a friend of hers and they're still calling her to do stuff over there. Vinnie kept saying that they stopped doing pieces over there that Beth was part of and that's why they don't need her anymore. Howard said that Beth is still upset that she's not welcome there anymore but Vinnie wanted to swear on anything he wanted him to.
Howard asked Vinnie why they're still calling Beth's friend to do sketches over there but not calling Beth. Vinnie said they don't do sketches over there anymore, they just do ''Will it Float'' once a week and that's about it.
Howard got off of the Beth stuff and moved on to play some tapes that Vinnie gave to them years ago. Vinnie made some love tapes for his wife, who was his girlfriend at the time, where he said some very disturbing things about scratching his balls and stuff like that. Howard played a few clips from those tapes and goofed on him saying that the creep meter was off the scale. Vinnie wasn't listening to his own tapes because they were so creepy.
Howard played some audio from the day Ringo Starr was on the show and Vinnie came in to ask him some questions. Vinnie wouldn't stop talking that day. In another clip Vinnie called in during a Donald Trump appearance to point out that a rerun of CSI had beat Trump's Apprentice.
The big thing about Vinnie is his singing. He's written some really bad songs that led to a lot of show material. He played Vinnie's ''Purple Dress'' song where Vinnie is singing it with his song writing partner Tom Gesimondo. That song led to a whole song parody contest where they gave away a $5,000 prize. One of the entries for the contest was a guy who got Robert Goulet to perform the song. Vinnie didn't like the way he performed the song though. The guy who actually won the contest was this guy Kevin Remuck who did it in a way that impressed Vinnie. He actually put together a CD of the best versions of the song that's available at RipTheMusic.com.
Howard asked Vinnie how long he's been in their lives. Vinnie said he's been with them since 1998 when they did the Saturday night TV show for CBS. They went down to New Orleans back then and had a great time down there. He talked about how they threw beads down to women who were flashing them. They actually got into trouble because Vinnie had submitted an $8,000 bill for beads to the company. The guys also shared some stories about that trip to New Orleans and how crazy it was.
Vinnie was talking about how funny Howard was down there when he was talking to the people at the NATPE convention. Howard thanked Vinnie for the stuff he's added to the show over the years and that he loves him. Howard claimed that he saw some tears running down Vinnie's face. Vinnie said he was crying inside but there were no tears coming down his face. Howard wrapped up and went to commercial after that.
Howard is thinking about having some people from his movie to come down on the final day to say goodbye to him. He mentioned Ratso Slomin's name and wondered who else he should invite. Artie mentioned the names Flo and Eddy who used to do a show after Howard's.
Howard said he was listening to the Super Fan Roundtable from Sunday night and they were talking about if he was acting gay while sitting next to Beth during the 60 Minutes thing. Howard said that Joey Boots (Actually Bob Levy) summed it up best by saying ''there's nothing gay about banging a model.'' Howard then played some audio from The View where they were talking about his 60 Minutes interview and the way Beth was talking about how their relationship is all about Howard and she doesn't mind that. The women on The View spent quite a while talking about relationships after bringing that subject up. The wheezing Star Jones was rambling on and on about nothing so Howard said he doesn't know who watches that show because he barely understands what they're talking about half the time. One of the women on The View, Elisabeth, said that there's a language of love that some couple have that keeps them together and Howard seemed to agree with what she said.
Howard promised that this would be Gilbert's final appearance on his terrestrial radio show. He wanted to get in one more time to plug his DVD which is available at GilbertGottfried.com. Gary came in and said that Gilbert has been adding a lot of little things to his web site and now he has a fan club link. Howard spent a few minutes talking to Gilbert about changing his name to something easier like Gil or something like that. Gilbert never thought about doing that and he's never asked his mother why she named him that. He did say he notices that in movies they always name the nerdy character ''Gilbert.''
Howard asked Gilbert about his father because they never hear anything about him. Gilbert revealed that his father owned a hardware store. He said that no one in his life was very warm toward him and everyone was cold. Howard wondered if Gilbert was ''Gilbert Jr.'' or if he even remembered what his name was. Gilbert just laughed and joked about everything. Gilbert said he was only 19 when his father passed away. He was never asked to join his father's hardware business but he would go down to the store and work for him once in a while.
Howard was trying to ask Gilbert serious questions about his father but Gilbert kept laughing at everything. It was very odd. Gilbert said that there really isn't much difference between the way he is now and how he was then so his parents knew not to ask him to join the family business. Howard asked Gilbert if his father ever beat him or anything like that. Gilbert laughed and laughed throughout the interview.
Howard gave Gilbert a plug for his dirty joke DVD and said it's available in stores and through his web site. He also mentioned the fan club that Gilbert has set up through his web site. He said his fans get nothing from the fan club and he doesn't even have an email newsletter that he sends out. He said he won't have anything on there that he has to spend a cent on. The fans don't get any news updates or anything like that.
Gilbert will be appearing at Caroline's on Broadway from December 22nd to the 24th. Howard gave him a plug for that and then played some clips from Gilbert's past appearances. Many of his segments can't be played on the show anymore because of the content. Howard is looking forward to having him on the new show once he moves because he'll be able to do anything.
The first clip they played was where Gilbert and Howard filled up 28 minutes of answering machine space on Jerry Seinfeld's answering machine. Gilbert was doing an impression of Jerry while Howard talked about how Jerry was dissing his show by not coming on after all of the support they gave him. Gary remembers Jerry calling him and telling him that he had listened to the whole 28 minutes and laughed his ass off while he was in an airport across the country.
Wendy the Retard called in and told Gilbert that she bought a ''boot-legged'' movie of his and it sucked. Howard then asked Wendy a bunch of questions about Gilbert raping her to which she answered ''yes'' for every question. The delay was hit at least 2 or 3 times during that call. Howard wrapped that up a few minutes later and said he'd see her on December 16th for the final show.
Gary had another great Gilbert moment from the show. This clip was the whole reason that Dennis Miller will no longer talk to them. Dennis was on the phone that day and mentioned that his 22 months old son was with him. Gilbert then asked the 22 month old what he was wearing and how big his testicles were. He was also telling the kid to put his hand in his diaper and rub and to do some other things that Miller wasn't too happy with. Miller actually put the kid on the phone for a short time. Gilbert and Howard continued to talk about the kid even after Miller got off the phone. Gilbert was in a very dark place that day. Howard asked him if that's something that Gilbert really feels. Gilbert joked that it's the way he feels every day. Howard had to take a break before getting to more Gilbert clips.
Gary had one more great Gilbert moment which was when he and Amy Heckerling's assistant were arguing about what Gilbert did to her and Amy's daughter. Howard played that clip and thanked Gilbert for the many years of great shows. He knows that many of his fans hate him but he still loves to have him on the show. Gary said there were other great moments that Gilbert was part of but they can't play them anymore. One of those moments was when he spent a half hour talking about Robin's ''big, black, Klugge.'' That was as much of the conversation as he could mention on the show.
Howard had Robin start her news after that. Gilbert hung around to have some fun with the news stories she read. Howard took some phone calls and spoke to a father and son who are going to visiting Howard on his final day. Gilbert started to ask the guy some questions about his young son but the delay was hit so we missed out on what he said.
Gilbert had Howard laughing his ass off at a couple of points during Robin's news. They were laughing about tragic stories that Robin was reading about. Fred was also throwing in some of Jackie the Joke Man's classic laughing clips for those same stories.
Gary the Retard called in and said that he bought Gilbert Gottfried's DVD and it sucked so he wants his money back. It was an obvious set up by the guys in the back since Wendy the Retard had done the same thing a little earlier in the show. Howard wrapped up the show around 10:35am.
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Howard sang along a little bit with the songs that were played at the start of the show. He then went on to talk about porn star Taylor Rain who has retired from porn to become a housewife. Gary told Howard that Howard 100 News got an interview with Taylor and got a lot of information out of her. Gary said he was there and saw Shuli there helping out Ralph Howard who was doing the interview since he didn't know a lot of the terms that she was using. Gary tried to mention some of those but can't do it because he would have gotten censored.
Howard mentioned that he did the Best Damn Sports Show last night as part of his media blitz. Model Petra Nemcova was there doing the show but he didn't get a chance to see her. He was going to talk to the hosts about what a great athlete she must have been to survive the tsunami she was in. Howard said he was doing the interview via satellite so it was kind of tough to do the interview. They had some cool technology where he could watch the hosts and himself at the same time but it threw him off a little bit.
Howard said he was listening to the SuperFan Roundtable last night and said he's really got to stop listening to that stuff. There was some talk about whether or not he was doing too much publicity and if he should have been doing the Best Damn Sports Show or not. Howard said his agent thought that he should do it so he goes with what he says. Howard doesn't think his fans should complain about him doing too much publicity because they usually like to see him on shows since he doesn't do that much publicity.
Howard went on to talk about how Katie told him he might want to go to therapy 5 days a week instead of just 4. He said that he's the one who gets along with his staff but there are stories about her not getting along with people. Maybe he's not the one who has to go to a psychiatrist. Ralph also pointed out that Katie told people to get their kids out of the room before they aired that segment yesterday.
Howard got a lot of mail about the way Katie was eyeing him up during the interview. There was some other feedback about the 60 Minutes interview and how lighting can really make him look good on one show and not so good on others.
Gary said that the Roundtable guys talked about the way Howard looked on the cover of New York Magazine and how bad he looked. He said that the girl on the show, Christine, said that his face looked long and his eyes looked odd. Howard said that he'll never work with that photographer again because of the way they screwed him over using that picture. There were some good pictures taken by the photographer that made it inside the magazine but not on the cover. Howard said he's never had luck with that magazine and he'll never do anything with them again.
Howard read some more e-mail feedback about his Katie Couric interview. A bunch of people thought she was hot for him. They were pointing out the sparkle in Katie's eye and how she was squirming in her seat as she spoke to him.
Howard and the guys talked about Katie Couric being asked by CBS news to come over to their channel to leave the Today Show. The guys think that she could be replaced though.
Howard brought up how Oprah Winfrey was doing her show yesterday and talking about shaving her private parts. She said that she doesn't shave a thing down there so that got him thinking about how nasty it must be down there. He said he had to turn the TV off when he heard that. Gary said his wife has been recording the show lately and he gets to see the show once in a while. He sees some pretty disturbing stuff on the show when he does watch.
Tabitha Stevens will be the next one to go to Meet the Shrink and that should be a good session. Gary said that Sal might want to go do one session with Dr. McGrath. Howard heard that Jeff the Drunk smoked weed before the session but that didn't come out on the air.
Howard said he's pretty much done with his media blitz for now. He's got just a couple more appearances scheduled like the Daily Show and Saturday Night Live. He may even bow out of doing SNL if he doesn't like the script they come up with for him. He was saying that Bill O'Reilly sent him a note and included one of his coffee mugs that he was just going to throw out. Beth told him to save it and she'd use it.
The caller Howard had on the line said that he would be down there on the 16th to see the final show. Howard quickly talked about that day. Tom came in and told Howard that they're still working on the final day but they're still waiting on a permit to do the whole thing. Howard told Tom to just call Governor Patacki and get him to help out. Gary said that they haven't said ''no'' to them yet, they're just waiting for an answer. Tom said that anything with Howard's name attached to it gets more attention than other things would.
Howard said that the people who get up and speak on that final day should keep things down to about a minute. Tom's name was mentioned last night on the Roundtable discussion and some people were saying that Tom shouldn't be allowed to say anything. Howard thinks he should but he should also keep it to a minute or so.
Jeff the Drunk called in so Howard spoke to him about the Meet the Shrink thing. Jeff said he didn't get home until after 2 in the morning but he was also saying that he should probably go back to the shrink on a regular basis. Howard asked him if he was hot for the doctor. Jeff said she wasn't bad.
Howard played the voice mail that Jeff left for them after he thought he was ''fired'' from the show after getting a prank phone call from someone claiming to be George Lopez. Howard told Jeff he did a good job last night and let him go.
Howard took a phone call from a guy who said the therapist on Meet the Shrink sounded hot. Howard said she had a great way about her and did a great job with Jeff. Jeff talked about how horrible he looks but the shrink told him he didn't look as bad as he thinks he does. That's what got Jeff interested in her and got him asking her to lay on the couch with him. Dr. McGrath asked Jeff what he was going to do after the session last night and Jeff said he was going out for a drink. Howard had to wrap up after that so he could take a commercial break.
Howard said he's working on the final day and where they're going to do everything. He said that he's going to drag out all of his big items like the RoboSpanker and stuff like that. Then he'll get up and address the crowd that has gathered outside. He may perform a song with The Losers and/or the Backside Boys. There will be Wack Packers and many frequent guests coming down to hang out.
Howard wanted to wheel his new stuff down to the new place but Tom didn't want them doing that. Since Tom won't let them do that, he's just going to wheel his stuff down the block. Then he wants to end the radio show and invite his fans to another place where they can party. He's trying to arrange for something special for the fans but he's not sure how many will actually make it down that day. He would like to do something but even he isn't sure exactly what that will be.
Starting at 6 in the morning on December 16th, Howard will have people making speeches. They'll have the band Staind and the band Train performing for them that day as well. Howard said that many of the fans will congregate in one location for that final show. Some fans will be able to follow him to the new place, some won't.
Gary said that they've had a lot of press asking to come down to take pictures and stuff like that. Howard said that Yahoo is going to be coming down to tape what goes on down there but Tom is apparently upset about that. Howard said you can't stop them from taping people out on the street though.
Howard said this is very insulting to him because those carts mean nothing to anyone. The station can't use them and he can't use them. He was going to save them for future reference but the company doesn't want him to do that, even though they can't reuse them.
Gary said that there were a bunch of people working in the hall yesterday ripping up the floor to check wires. They were working and the interns were working taking inventory. There was a ton of work going on and they're not even out of there yet.
Howard said that they came in this morning and found that one of their microphone stands was broken because one of the people doing inventory broke it. He thinks that they should just calm down already and leave the carts alone and leave the wiring in the studio alone until they're out of there. Gary said there's probably more that will be going on today so he'll have more stories to tell tomorrow.
Ralph called in and asked Tom to come into the studio so he could ask him why they seem to want to piss Howard's fans off by doing all of this stuff to Howard. Howard doesn't know why they're doing this but it seems like they're mad at him for leaving. Howard thought it was kind of funny how Tom didn't need an inventory of those tapes until he mentioned something about doing an inventory himself. The carts they have in the studio haven't been used in years because they've put them all on CD already so there's no reason to keep them other than having a backup.
Howard told Gary to just bulk erase the tapes and leave them for Tom to take care of. Gary was saying that it may not even be possible for them to erase the tapes because the company doesn't want them to. Howard said that he's going to burn those tapes before he leaves them in the hands of that company. They can't play them without him and he can't play them with out the company's permission so no one will be using them. They may not even have a bulk eraser because no one even uses carts these days. Everyone has gone digital so it's tough to even find that kind of thing these days.
Ralph asked for Tom to come in again but Tom wasn't rushing in. Howard said that this whole inventory thing would have been helpful about 5 years ago. Artie said he'd love to hear the intern walking around and saying the names of each cart into his tape recorder.
A listener called in and asked Howard what went on with Stuttering John because he hadn't heard anything since the show was off the air in his area for a while. Howard said there wasn't much to tell, John just went to work on the Tonight Show.
Pinnochio Dave called in and said that he'll never call Howard Pinnichio again after seeing him on the cover of New York Magazine. He said he looks more like an arm pit than a Brad Pitt. That got Gary talking about the Roundtable last night and how someone (that would be me) said that the Newsweek picture of Howard in the Boy Scout uniform looked ''creepy.'' Howard said that was just another mistake he made going with that kind of photo. He had to take another break after that.
Howard asked Trump about his problems with Forbes magazine and how they thought he was only worth about $250 million when he was actually worth over two and a half billion dollars. He said he actually opened up his books for them to prove that's what he's worth. It's tough to do but he runs his business based on the fact that he's a billionaire and had to straighten them out.
Howard told Trump about how John Travolta has a couple of Boeing 707s that he's able to park in his driveway down at his Florida home. He said that people are always talking about how much money he makes but someone like John Travolta has two airplanes in his driveway. Trump said that Travolta buys old airplanes and fixes them up so it doesn't cost as much as Howard thinks. Howard said it's got to cost a ton of money to maintain two airplanes like that though. Trump usually ends up taking his own, private plane when he flies around the country and it's much easier than taking a commercial flight. Howard and the guys talked about Travolta and what kind of money he must be worth. Artie said he owns the rights to a couple of hit records like Grease and Saturday Night Fever. That alone could make him a ton of money.
Howard talked about how great Donald has been on the show over the years. He said that he's always been very honest and sometimes too honest. That led to them talking about how Trump's wife Melania is pregnant now. Howard wondered if that's going to ruin the relationship. Trump said it won't ruin it but Howard pointed out that Donald got rid of Marla Maples because she had a pimple.
Howard also asked Trump about his son getting married. Donald said that he was out with his son one time and they saw a very elegant and beautiful woman so he told his son that's the kind of woman he should marry. He brought him over and introduced him to her. Robin said she thinks the son's wife looks a lot like Melania but Trump said he doesn't think that's the case.
Trump was talking about how women tend to blow up when they get pregnant but Melania has gotten large in all of the right places. Howard said that if Melania doesn't whip herself back into shape after the baby, it's all over. Donald thinks that she's got the kind of body that will snap right back into place the day after the baby is born. Howard said that Donald is going to give her a whole day to snap back, that's pretty tough. Trump said he's seen some women who gain like 250 pounds and never get back to the way they looked. He thinks that Melania will be able to do that though.
The guys talked about model Heidi Kluum who had a baby. Trump said that she's a little off right now and is no longer a 10. He said that she went from a 10 to about an 8 after the baby. Howard thinks she went down to about a 7 though. Donald also talked about how Howard ruined his relationship with Marla. Howard was at his wedding and gave an interview where he said ''there wasn't a wet eye in the house'' and that their relationship would last just 3 months. Donald remembers laughing at that comment but Marla cried about it. The relationship lasted longer than 3 months but it did fail eventually.
Donald said that Howard once asked Melania if she knew what cellulite was, trying to find out if she had any on her body. Melania said that she didn't know what it was just because she didn't have any. The headlines in the paper the next day said that Melania didn't know what the term meant at all.
Howard was going to play some of his favorite Trump moments but Donald was talking about how dumb Infinity was for keeping Howard around for the past year. He said that if he was working for him, he would have been fired the day he announced he was moving to satellite. He thinks that Howard staying there was an amazing way to promote his move to satellite and still can't believe how dumb Infinity was for keeping him around.
Howard got to one of his favorite Donald Trump moments. It was a show where he asked Donald to rate a bunch of women on a scale of 1 to 10 and he went right ahead and did it. Trump gave Nicolette Sherridan a 4, Carmen Electra an 8, Charlize Theron a 7, Halle Berry a 10 for body and 8 face, and Pam Anderson a 6.
Howard asked Donald how he could get Donald to do a half hour show each week on Howard 100 where he rates women. Donald said that it might be a good show to do in SIRIUS. Howard said he's going to talk to him about doing something with him over there but he's not sure he can afford him.
Donald once got into an argument with AJ Benza on the air so Howard played that as another one of his favorite moments. Trump and AJ were arguing about an old girlfriend that Trump stole away from AJ. Trump held his ground and was able to battle AJ better than anyone could. AJ did threaten to kill Trump at one point but Donald said he really didn't pay any attention to what he was saying that day.
Donald said that Howard once ruined the Miss Universe pageant winner. She had won the pageant but had to be fired after she appeared on Howard's show because he ruined her. She started to refuse to do certain interviews so Donald had to fire her. Howard said that wasn't one of Trump's moments so that's why he didn't play any of that interview.
Howard asked Donald about Martha Stewart's Apprentice show and if he's happy that it failed. Donald said he doesn't have anything against Martha and wanted her show to go well so he's not happy that it's gone. Gary asked Trump to give her a rating from 1 to 10 and Trump gave her a 10 because she's a friend of his. He said that her show didn't make it because it didn't have the magic that his show does. Howard gave him a plug for his show which has it's season finale on December 15th.
Howard took some phone calls for Trump. One guy asked if Donald would be at Howard's send off on December 16th. Donald said that he wasn't invited down there so he's not sure. Howard told him he's definitely invited. The caller also asked Donald to give his theory on revenge. Trump said that his theory on revenge is to go and get them much, much harder than people get you.
Ralph called in and told Trump that he's a huge fan of The Apprentice but there's too much sponsorship the past few seasons. He said it loses the street feel of the show. Trump said he's heard that from a few people but he disagrees with that. Ralph was also saying that he loves the board room stuff and would rather see that than the tasks that the people do. Donald said that's what most people want to see but Mark Burnett believes that they should keep it short. Donald said a lot of people want them to extend the board room but he just can't get Mark Burnett to do that.
Gary came in and told Howard that Donald has a new Vodka coming out too. Donald said that he has mixed feelings about that because his brother died because of alcohol. He said he hates what it does to people and he will be giving the proceeds to charity because of that. Howard thanked Trump for coming in and gave him another plug for his final two shows of this season's Apprentice which air this week and next. He went to break a short time later.
Howard said that Gary was showing him the second part of the Today Show interview he did with Katie Couric. He said that it was actually pretty good because it was a tour of the studios at SIRIUS. Gary also pointed out that Howard used to be very much against marriage when he was asked if he would ever do it again. He used to say ''No!'' when he'd be asked about it and now it's come to ''I don't think so'' when he's asked. Howard told Gary that he and Beth are in the same place right now and they really don't need to be married. They also don't want to have any kids so they're very happy.
Gary was also thinking that Katie was kind of flirting with Howard during the interview. Howard said he thinks he could be doing her and if he was, it would be the biggest story out there. Howard thinks that if he dumped Beth and started to date Katie, it would be the biggest cliffhanger show ever and people would have to buy satellite radios to hear what was going on. Gary thinks that Howard would still get more attention than Katie if they did start dating.
Howard thinks it would be pretty funny to date someone like Katie. The guys talked about how crazy things would get if the two of them were actually going out. Howard figures he would be a disaster if he was in a relationship with someone like that. He's way too demanding.
Bong Hit Eric called in and said that he watched the Today Show thing and thought it was really good. He also thought that Katie really liked him and probably would do him. Howard said he would do her just so he could report back to his audience about what that was like. Howard was wondering what kind of body she could have under those clothes. He said he'd probably date her for about 3 months before things went wrong. He said that he would probably do her two times a week while he's away on vacation just to keep the crowd wondering what's up with them.
Bong Hit gave Howard an F, Marry, Kill with the names:
Howard talked to Eric about last night's Meet the Shrink with Jeff the Drunk and how funny that was. Eric missed it because he doesn't have his radio hooked up yet. Artie ended up doing his impression of Jeff while Howard pretended to be the therapist. They had some fun with that for a few seconds.
Howard said he really wanted to do the cliffhanger show on the final day there but Tom won't let them. He's going to hold off on doing that until January 9th when he starts at the new place. They may reveal the stories on the first day and hold off for a week before revealing whose stories they were.
Howard took a few more phone calls and one woman said that she thinks that Beth will be more famous than Katie Couric is by the time she's her age. Howard didn't get her point and ended up hanging up on her. Another caller asked Howard if he will be able to keep his material from the new place when he leaves there. Howard said he made sure he got the rights to that material because he didn't want to go through that crap again after going through it with Infinity.
Howard said he got a personal email from Sal who asked him if he was going to the Christmas party tonight because if Howard isn't going, he's not going. Gary said he had Sal ask him this morning if he knew if Howard was going. Howard told Sal to get his own life and to leave him alone. He said he wouldn't even want to see Sal at the party if he was there anyway.
Sal got all creepy with Howard again and said that he and Howard are both under a lot of stress about the move and he was thinking they could have a few drinks and unload together. Howard said that they're not friends even though Sal is trying to be his friend. Howard turns him away every time he says that he wants to be his friend. Howard wondered why he doesn't want to hang out with the other guys from the show who are also under a lot of stress. Sal said he has hung out with them but Gary said he hasn't come to him or a few other people.
Howard told Sal that he's out of his F'n mind with this stuff. He seems to think that if he does show up to the party, he'll only want to hang out with him. That's not going to happen.
Richard said he was on the phone with Sal yesterday when he was over at In Demand and asked him if he was going to their Christmas party. Sal said that if Howard isn't going, then he's not going. Richard said that Sal never seems like he's at peace when he's around Howard so he doesn't understand why he'd want to hang out with him. Sal said they could have some great conversations together.
Sal still seems to think that he's friends with Howard and he just wants to hang out with a friend at this party. Some of the guys wanted to know why he doesn't just hang out with his other friends if that's the case. Howard told Sal he's about as gay as it gets. He was complaining about how Howard ran off to hang out with Pam Anderson one night instead of hanging out with him one night.
Ralph called in and told Sal that he sounded like a desperate chick and he's really got to mellow out. Sal was shaking according to the guys but Sal said he thinks he's got some kind of nerve damage. Sal also told the guys that Ralph is desensitized to hanging around Howard, that's why he's not as excited about the whole thing. Howard said that Sal is not going to be invited to the premiere party for the Supertwink movie that they've been working on for Howard Stern On Demand.
Sal said he thinks he's finally gotten his answer from Howard as far as hanging out with him. Gary told Sal that he should just ask Howard out on a date since he won't go to the Christmas party if Howard isn't going. He doesn't care about hanging out with anyone else from the station, just Howard. Sal was also saying that he'd have to get a babysitter to go to the party tonight because his wife is working. That's just another reason he doesn't want to go if Howard isn't going.
Howard told Sal that he has his daughter today and then another meeting after that. Then he has to go out to Long Island and won't be home until 7 or 7:30 so he won't be able to make it. He may pop his head into the party at some point if he does have time. Ronnie the Limo Driver came in and told Sal that it's really none of his business if he's going to the party or not.
Dan the Song Parody Man called in and said that he was talking to Sal about the party last week but that was the In Demand party. Howard had to wrap up with those guys so he could take a break and get Blue Iris in there. They didn't stop though, Sal knew Howard's schedule better than Gary did and managed to detail what Howard was wearing at the last Christmas party. Gary told Sal that they may have to get a restraining order for Sal to keep him away from Howard. He wondered if they could keep him 50 feet away from Howard.
A woman called in and asked if this was the gay channel she was listening to. She also gave Howard another F, Marry, Kill game to play. She gave him these names...
Artie said he feels bad for Jeff because he didn't think Jeff knew he looked hideous. Robin said she didn't think Jeff had a problem living at home with his mother but he obviously does. Artie was also saying that Jeff isn't all that much more hideous than he is. Howard played another clip where Jeff told the shrink that he felt like going out and having a beer.
Howard said that they're going to get Blue to fill in for Heidi Cortez one night for Tissue Time so she can put some guys to sleep. As they were talking about that show, the delay was hit multiple times. Richard Christy came in and said they spoke to Blue about losing her virginity back in the 60s. Sal was talking to her and actually got so worked up he had to go run off a batch according to Richard.
Blue appears in The Ding Dong Show at the Comedy Store in Los Angeles each week. You can find out more about that at TheDingDongShow.com. Howard told her that he can't wait to hear her do the Tissue Time thing and maybe that will lead to her own show. Howard wrapped up with her and took a call from Doug Goodstein from In Demand.
JD, who is the star of Supertwink, came in and said that Ebert and Roeper just reviewed ''Broke Back Mountain'' this past week and they should have no problem reviewing this movie. Robin told Howard that maybe Ebert and Roeper need to hear from him or Gary so they know who they're dealing with. Supertwink is supposed to premiere on Howard Stern On Demand on January 1st. Howard is going to hold a private party for the premiere sometime around that date... and Sal isn't invited.
A woman called in and told Howard that it would be great if Richard Simmons came in for the final show on December 16th. Howard said he'd love to have him down there but he's not sure if they even invited him.
Another caller brought up SIRIUS so the delay was hit as he and Howard were talking about it. We missed out on most of what the caller was saying.
Howard got a hold of the nude pictures of Jennifer Aniston that have been circulating the web lately. He thinks that her breasts are real. He asked the other guys what they thought. Everyone pretty much agreed that they looked real to them. There was one picture of Jennifer laying down and one of her sitting up and from that the guys determined that the breasts were real.
Hook Nose Mike called in and told Howard he's going to try to be down there for the final show on December 16th. He wondered when it's going to hit Howard that he's actually leaving. Howard said he's not sure but he does have a lot of stress going on right now because of the move. He went on to talk about the poor treatment he's been getting from his current employer. He was also saying that most people never get a chance to say goodbye to their fans when they leave some place like that but he's been saying goodbye for the past year and he's getting kind of sick of it. He's ready to move to the new place already.
Tom said that the concept of teasing there to pay out ''over there'' just won't work. He doesn't want Howard giving out the revelations because it's too much of a teaser for people to follow Howard over to the new place. Howard said everyone knows where he's going already and it's already going to be a cliffhanger even if they don't give out the revelations. Howard said that if Tom comes through with everything they're planning for the final show, it's probably the most that any radio station has done for someone leaving their company.
Howard had Robin start her news a short time later. During the news Howard mentioned that they got some mail from some people in St. Louis who complained that the show was cut short yesterday. Howard didn't know anything about it but figured it may have been a satellite problem. He asked Gary to find out what went on with that.
Robin finished up her news and Howard ended the show around 10:45am.
Howard sang along with Bob Marley's song a little bit and then asked Artie if he ever got into reggae music. Artie said he never even came close to getting into it, he hates it. Howard kept singing as they waited for Robin to come into her dark booth. She showed up a short time later and asked the guys if they liked The Police because they were considered reggae-influenced when they appeared on the scene. Howard said he likes them but Artie wasn't a fan of theirs either.
Howard wanted to give away the carts to the fans on his final day as little pieces of history but Tom went nuts and said that they couldn't take the tapes. The company lawyer sent him a legal letter saying that he can't take them even though K-Rock isn't going to use them. Howard decided to erase all of the tapes so no one will have them. Now there's a problem with the bulk erasing because they have to hire someone to do it. Now they're going to check every single box that they take out of the station next week. They have engineer Richie Herbie doing that job.
Gary said that he spoke to someone about erasing the tapes and now they're telling him that they may not be able to get someone to erase them for a couple of weeks. Gary wants to make sure they're erased by the time they leave. Howard said if he gave away all of the carts, the company is afraid that all of the fans are going to give him the carts back and he'll be able to keep them. It's kind of crazy that they're making a big deal out of it because no one is going to be able to use them once they leave the company.
Howard has told Tom that they already have all of the carts on CD as a backup so he already has the audio. They're making a big deal out of these carts that no one can use. Howard said that Tom gets something in his head and won't let go of it, that's why he's so set on making sure the carts don't go anywhere. There was a suggestion to take the carts out on the street and have them run over by a steam roller. Gary said that it would actually be cheaper to do that than to have them bulk erased. He said the bulk eraser will cost them $2,500.
Tom didn't come running in as he usually does so Howard figured he must have had a few words with the company lawyer. Tom came in and said he's really tired of being the pin cushion boy about all of this and he's really not the one who came down with this order. He suggested to Howard that he just let the company keep the carts and store them. Howard told him ''No way!'' He said that he doesn't trust the company with his tapes so there's no way he's going to let them keep them without erasing them. Howard told him that if the bulk eraser doesn't get there within a couple of days, they'll start ripping out the tape from each and every cart.
Tom said that the company doesn't want to let the carts go because they have copyrighted material on them. Howard said that neither of them can use the material without the permission from the other so it's not going to be used by either of them.
Tom tried to change subjects and said that he missed him at the company Christmas party last night. Howard said he's glad that he didn't go in light of this conversation. He said it's very tacky and it's become a personal battle for the carts. Tom said that it's not personal and it's not his decision. Howard told him that it is personal no matter what Tom says to him.
Howard told Tom that he has been totally honest in this business and he can't believe that the company is handling him right now. He said he once got a check for a million dollars from the company, in error, that he could have cashed but he was honest and let them know they made a mistake. That's the honesty that he's demonstrated and now they're treating him like a thief.
Tom told Howard that he trusts Howard and they don't want to check each and every box they take out of there. They want to make sure they don't take those carts though. Howard also wants to make sure no one else gets a hold of those carts, that's why he wants to erase them. He suggested to Tom that they steam roll them on the final show like Gary suggested earlier. He gave him a couple of other options like giving them away to the fans. Tom told Howard that the company is also offering to put them into storage. Howard said that he doesn't want them throwing them into a back room at the station when he could put them into a secure storage area where he keeps his stuff. Tom said that he has to talk to other people at the company about doing that before he can say yes to the request.
Gary apologized to Tom for goofing on him earlier. Tom told Howard this would be a good time to promote the fact that they're giving away some money on the final show. Howard gave a plug to SpikeTV's Video Game Awards since they're the sponsor for the $10,000 they're giving away next Friday.
The Sim told Howard that he listened to the Tissue Time with Blue Iris show that aired last night on Howard 100. Howard hadn't heard it yet but Gary had some clips for him to play. Howard played a clip where Blue Iris, the 58 year old who sounds 80, porn actress talks about losing her virginity.
King of All Blacks called in and said he thought the Bill O'Reilly interview was actually pretty funny because Howard was yelling at Bill about his dopey act that he does for his viewers. Howard pointed out that O'Reilly is a phony because he pretends to be a man of the people but makes millions and wears a ton of make-up when he's on camera. Bill claims that he lives in a regular house but Howard heard from a cop-friend of his who said that O'Reilly lives on a really nice compound in a nice area. Howard had to get going so he could take a commercial break but King wanted to tell Howard about a TV show idea he had for his In Demand show. Howard told him he'd put him in touch with Doug Goodstein so he could pitch the idea to him.
Howard and Robin talked about the SuperFan RoundTable that aired the other night. Howard said he has to stop listening to that stuff because it really gets him worked up and then he can't sleep. She thinks that the show has to be stopped just like one caller said on Howard 100 News.
Howard said they have a lot of shows in development for his new channels but they have things like Tissue Time airing already. Last night they aired Tissue Time with Blue Iris instead of Heidi Cortez. Richard Christy came in and told Howard about some of the weird stuff that went on during that episode. Howard played some of the clips and listened to Blue talking to some listeners trying to get them off. It was very disturbing to hear this old lady talking dirty to younger sounding men. Howard said it was vile and couldn't believe it went on for 45 minutes.
Howard goofed on Blue's very unsexy sex talk. The caller she had on the line in one clip was actually cracking jokes as he was pretending to get off as he drove his car. Howard said most of the show was too dirty to play for everyone. He wondered how long it would be before the FCC comes after him on satellite radio. The guys said it'll probably start tomorrow.
Howard played another clip from Blue Iris' show where she was trying to get another guy off. As he was playing it Howard said that his channel is probably going to get so much attention that the government will have a special meeting of Congress just so they can start regulating the content. They'll probably change the laws on January 8th, the day before he's supposed to start broadcasting over there. Richard Christy said he was in tears laughing as he heard this show last night.
Howard said he got a bunch of e-mail from people who corrected him about the Jennifer Aniston discussion they had yesterday. Howard got a hold of the Jennifer Aniston topless pictures and thought her breasts looked real but the ''experts'' out there are saying that they're definitely implants.
Howard played more of the Blue Iris stuff but the delay hits started coming. Howard wrapped up and went to break a short time later.
Howard convinced her to let him play it. When he did you could hear how pissed off Christine was getting at Sal for trying to get the dog's ass into the picture. She was screaming at him. Howard told her she sounds like she's ''had it'' with Sal. She said that's true and she's sick of her husband sitting around like a lump on a log.
Howard had another clip where the kids were screaming and Sal and Christine were yelling at each other again. Christine was on the phone with someone and Sal was trying to help clean up but Christine told him to go away until he was done with work. Howard let out a sigh after hearing her yell at him. Howard told them it sounds like they're in hell. Sal said that he loves his wife and that's just the life they live.
In another clip Sal was asked to pick up a curtain rod that had fallen but he was holding their 1 year old baby so he asked Christine to pick it up. She then flipped out on him yelling about how she does all kinds of stuff while holding the baby. Howard said it sounds like she spends the whole day screaming about this stuff. Sal said that the tape was from last night right after he got home from work.
Howard asked the two of them when they met and how long they've been together. Sal said they met at 19, got married at 25. Howard said it sounds like they're no peace and quiet in that house and it's just torture. He doesn't understand why people get married and have kids. He said his kids were saints compared to most. The guys pointed out that Howard locked himself in his basement to get away from his kids. That's how he escaped and eventually got divorced.
Gary said that his kids are getting older and easier to handle now but he knows what it was like when his kids were the ages of Sal's kids. Christine was complaining about the way Sal was taking the pictures last night so Sal was yelling at her because he was trying to be like a professional photographer by snapping away.
Sal said that they get along really well when they're alone and away from the kids. It's the kids that make it hard. Gary thinks that Sal and Christine should have their own show on Howard 100 because he could listen to the fighting for hours. They were also talking about putting them on Meet the Shrink over there. Howard said the show could end up being called ''Breaking Ellen McGrath'' since they'd probably break the Shrink on Meet the Shrink.
Howard asked if Sal and Christine still have sex. Gary said he heard it was back in October or November when he last had sex. Christine said that wasn't true but wouldn't give them any information about when it was. She says that Sal is Pinnochio and he's lying about that stuff. Howard wanted her to swear on the life of her children that she was telling the truth but she wouldn't do that. Sal said it's been a couple of weeks at least since they last had sex. Christine doesn't think that's the case.
Gary asked if Sal asks for sex and gets turned down. Christine said that it's not like that, they have kids running around and that's what holds them back sometimes. Gary said he can't believe it sometimes when he can't get sex from his wife. Howard told Christine that maybe she could use her mouth on Sal once in a while. She didn't think that was very nice. That led to Sal saying that Christine finds that kind of dirty so it doesn't happen. Sal said he's okay with that but the guys can't believe that because he has a lot of wacky sexual fantasies that he talks about on the show.
Gary asked if that oral thing was ever an aspect of their relationship. Sal said it was in the beginning of their relationship but ever since then, it hasn't happened much. Howard said he hopes that his daughters are like Christine and never do that to a guy.
Bobo called in and told Sal that his life sounds like his did back in 1997, before he got divorced and got the kids out of the house. He said when the kids were in the house it was a nightmare. Howard asked Christine what she's going to do today. Sal answered for her and said she'll probably be calling Dominic Barbara (divorce lawyer). Howard asked Christine if she would let Sal date. She said that if she can date, he can date but he'd also have to move to his mother's house or into the garage. Sal told Christine to tell her sister to be in the garage tonight which made it sound like he was into her sister. Gary asked Sal if he ever thought about her sister while pleasuring himself. Christine didn't want him to answer that because her family was listening. Sal said, in that case, he would say he's never thought about that.
Howard replayed the audio of Christine yelling at Sal about cleaning up the house while he was holding the baby. Sal said he has a small MP3 player that he just put on the counter to record all of the yelling. Howard had to go to break after that.
A caller from Boston told Howard that he sent his cell phone to the soldiers in Iraq and left Howard's number in the phone for them. Howard said that he just sent his iPod to Sgt. Keith Manning who has been a guest on the show a couple of times. That got Howard talking about how they won't put his show on the Voice of America radio over in Iraq because they're afraid of offending the people over there. They have no problem putting Rush Limbaugh on though.
Howard said that Donald Trump was on the show yesterday and the NY Post picked up on him calling his wife a monster but he didn't mean anything by it. Trump was just talking about how his wife was a monster in all of the right places.
Howard read some e-mail about the Meet the Shrink show that aired the other night on Howard 100. Jeff the Drunk was on the show trying to get some help that night. There were other e-mailers who liked the Donald Trump interview that he did yesterday. Howard said he got some mail about Artie's movie ''Beer League'' getting picked up by Echo Bridge for distribution sometime next year. Artie said it should be out in March or April.
Howard read some mail about Sal's comments about Howard from yesterday's show. Someone wrote in about Steve O saying that SIRIUS had wasted their money on Howard because they only have a couple million listeners and it's not enough to pay his salary. Howard said Steve O has the right to his own opinion but he's not exactly the one you run to for that kind of advice.
Howard said there's a report in the paper about how Jackie will be back on the show next Thursday. Jackie is coming in for the first time since 2001. Howard read some of the comments Jackie made about his upcoming appearance and they were kind of dopey. Howard read some of the comments in his Jackie voice and goofed on him a little bit.
Howard got some feedback about the 60 Minutes interview that aired the other night and they were number 1 for the week and had almost twice the viewers they usually have.
Howard got a note from Jeff Jarvis (BuzzMachine.com) who said that he's taken a closer look at Jennifer Aniston's breast pictures and it does appear that she does have implants. Howard checked them out again and can't imagine how he can see what he's seeing as far as the scarring.
Howard brought up the shooting that went on yesterday on an airplane at Miami International Airport. Robin didn't like the headline she read in one paper because it said that the man was ''gunned down'' and that's not exactly the case. The guy was yelling about having a bomb on the plane and an air marshall had to shoot him. Howard likes that the air marshalls are out there and doing their job.
Robin thinks that Howard is going to be the one who eventually breaks down and asks Beth to marry him. He said that Robin has been saying that for over 5 years now and it still hasn't happened. Robin said that in 10 years Howard will have one of those Sal tapes to play for them. Howard said that Artie will never get married after hearing Sal's tape. Artie said that it was like listening to a horror film or something.
Howard said that when John gets mad at someone, there's very little stuttering so maybe it would be best if he was mad all the time. Howard played some audio of John yelling at Ralph and calling him names. His stutter really does go away when he's yelling at someone. John has been a good sport all the years he's been on the show. John was trying to spit something out but Howard kept interrupting him, not letting him get his thoughts out. John just wanted to say that the thoughts expressed in that clip weren't his actual views.
Howard played an audio clip of Gary the Retard and John the Stutterer making a prank call and then started to wrap up with him. John wanted to spit something else out but wasn't coming out fast enough. Howard told him he wanted to move on to their next guest. John wanted to say a few words about Bill O'Reilly but Howard wanted him to save it for the 16th. John started to go off on people like Bill and Rush Limbaugh but Howard cut him off and moved on to the next guest.
Louis the board operator was the next guest. He works in the back helping them out with audio stuff. Louis won't be going with them to the new place. He said that the offer he got from Eh, ehh, ehh wasn't as good as the offer he got from K-Rock so he won't be going along with them. Louis was there so Howard could play his favorite moment from the show. Louis said it was actually the Stevie Wonder interview but Will had Paul McCartney written down. Gary said that's because they got a couple of choices from each person on the show.
Louis was also saying that he thought the broadcast Howard did on 9/11 was amazing. They talked about that day and the day after when Howard was back on the air. Howard told Louis that one of his favorite moments was when he said that he didn't like Gary. Gary came in and said that they're fine now and get along much better now.
Howard played a clip from the Paul McCartney interview since it was supposed to be Louis' favorite moment from the show. In the clip McCartney talked about Yoko Ono a little bit but tried not to bad mouth her.
Howard said goodbye to Louis and told him to come by and visit them at the new place. Louis said that he would love to do that. He wrapped up with Louis and John the Stutterer and then went to commercial.
Later in the show Howard gave John the Stutterer a couple of plugs that he forgot to give earlier... WeRun.biz to book John for apearances and Tempe12.com for a college callendar.
Howard wanted to change the name of his Howard Stern On Demand show but Doug seems to think it's a good name because it says what it is without a lot of explanation. Howard was looking for something more creative.
Howard took a call from a guy who asked him why he has to have ''gay Ralph'' on that SuperFan RoundTable show all the time. Howard told the guy that he's doing that one hour show, once a week. If he doesn't want to hear him he can tune into a different channel. The guy said he wants Ralph off of the show completely and thinks that everyone will be much happier if that happens.
Howard read some news stories and talked about how Eminem is talking about going back to the ex-wife he's divorced from. Howard thought that was pretty crazy.
Howard heard that Steve had straightened out his life and got a real job instead of working as a stand in on The Sopranos. Steve had gotten into an apprentice program to become an electrician but he's now dropped out of that. Steve said he's going to be getting back into show business but he's working as a bar tender and a P.A. right now. Howard said he was never in show business though so he'd just now be getting into it. Steve said he really didn't enjoy the electrician job and had to get out of it. Steve said it was good pay and he could have been making $43 an hour. Robin said he'd be lucky to make $43 a day working the jobs he's working now.
Howard said he actually dedicated one of his books to Steve years ago. He said he knew that it would be emotional for Steve but he had to do it because Steve was the guy who was baking his potato every day and getting him his hot water. Howard had an audio clip from the day he gave the book to Steve to read on the air but he had a problem with one of the words... He pronounced the word debt as ''debit.'' Howard goofed on Steve that day about the debit screw up. Steve says that he misses all of that stuff now.
Robin asked Steve why he had to leave the show. He said he was becoming one of those angry employees and he didn't want people to hate him. Howard says it was time for Steve to leave around that time anyway. Gary said things got kind of weird because he hired KC after Steve quit and everything happened kind of quickly. Steve said he really didn't want to leave but he really did have to lave.
Howard heard that Steve is married now and that his wife is really hot. Artie has met her and said that she really is hot. Steve said that Artie tried to hit on her the night that he met her.
Howard had one of their favorite Steve Grillo moments from the show. It was when Steve was sub-leasing Stuttering John's apartment and they were refusing to leave even though John had to get them out of there. Steve didn't understand what the problem was and couldn't believe that John was going to make him homeless.
Howard played another clip where Steve interviewed Charles Grodin and almost got punched out over it. He played another clip of Steve singing ''I Have an Impossible Job.'' He then wrapped up with Steve and said it was great to see him again. Steve said if he has any jobs open at the new place, he's kind of out of work right now so he'd love to come back. Howard told him he heard that they need an electrician over there but Steve said ''Too bad.'' Howard went to break after that.
Bong Hit Eric called in and talked to Howard about his Bill O'Reilly interview for a couple of minutes. Howard said he had a good time doing that interview. Eric also asked Howard when he's going to be doing Saturday Night Live. Howard told him that if he does it, it'll be on December 17th, the day after his final radio show. Howard let Eric go and talked about the ten grand he's going to be giving away on his final show.
Howard and Robin talked about the final show a little bit and Howard said he can't believe that all of his audience isn't going to follow him over to the new place. They've stuck with the show while it's sucked the past few years so maybe they should come with them to hear the show get good again.
Robin said that Howard can't just give a 1 minute speech on the final show. He said that he'll probably do a 15 minute speech or something like that. Robin was also saying that she heard a weather forecast on Howard 100 News the other night and the guy predicted that they'll have good weather.
Richard Christy asked if he could perform the Baker Street Baba Booey song parody on the final show. Howard said that would be great and people would probably love it. Richard also asked if he could drink some Jagermeister with him. Howard said he won't be drinking Jager but maybe something else.
Howard played some more audio clips from the Tissue Time with Blue Iris show that aired on Howard 100 last night. Howard couldn't believe that guys were actually getting off to her but Richard said he could hear the guys on the phone actually doing stuff. As Howard was playing one clip the delay was hit at least once. Howard said they have to have her back on that show after listening to that. The clip had the delay hit on it multiple times even though they had it bleeped. Howard said that Blue Iris is a star and they have to have her back on. In one clip a guy was pounding on something but Howard thought it might be a suction cup on the floor or something from the way it sounded.
Howard said that he tries to explain what he's up to when he's being interviewed and when he tells someone like Bill O'Reilly about these shows, he gets a look of disgust. He said it's not for people like that though, it's for the fans.
Howard said that JD has become a ladies man all of a sudden. He was at the Christmas Party last night getting lap dances from the interns. Howard heard JD was drinking a lot but JD said it wasn't all that much, he just had 3 Jack and Cokes. Howard checked out the pictures of JD getting his lap dances and the girls looked really cute. JD said he had one girl licking his face and he managed to get that by getting them drunk.
Howard was goofing on JD for not being able to hold his liquor very well. JD said he got the spins on Saturday night after having just 2 Jack and Cokes.
Gary said that he's taking his kids skiing so Howard talked about how he'd hate doing something like that. He's afraid of going fast on the snow on skis so Gary pointed out how afraid of everything Howard seems to be. He doesn't like to go fast or hear about his kids playing football and stuff like that. Howard ended that and had Robin start her news.
A woman called in and asked Howard if he was going to be giving away radios the day of the final show. The delay was hit on her question but it was easy to figure out what she was asking for. Howard said he probably wouldn't be able to do that but he could give her $500 today. He gave her the prize money which was courtesy of the movie Havoc.
Irish John called in and told Howard he was one of the guys who called in to the Blue Iris show last night. Howard thought he had that audio clip but he wasn't able to find it. He looked through all of the stuff he had but had trouble finding the right CD. Howard eventually found it but when he played it, they hit the delay and chopped most of the interesting parts out.
A short time later Gary came in and told Howard that Sean the White Rapper was on the phone calling in from jail. He was apparently busted for some kind of drug sting thing and he may be facing up to 20 years. Howard went to pick up the phone but Sean had been disconnected because his time was up. His friend was on the phone and told Howard what had happened.
Robin finished up her news and Howard ended the show around 10:45am.
Howard started off the show introducing Jeff Schick but not explaining why he was there. He went on to talk about the snow in the city this morning after Artie said he was wiping the snow from his morning muffin.
Howard said that there are only 5 shows left after today so it must be hitting everyone. Robin said that someone was talking about who will cry on the final show on the Super Fan RoundTable show. Howard said he may just break down if he speaks from the heart. He was also saying that this isn't really the ''last show'' so he's not going to get too crazy. It's just the last show there at WXRK and a new beginning for his next radio show. Robin said that it's like a pilgrimage for a lot of fans who are heading out there for that show.
Howard said he's been taking notes for the final show and thought about making a speech where he mentions names starting with each letter of the alphabet but now he's thinking that people will be upset if he leaves names out of the list.
Howard brought up the fact that this kid from The Sopranos has been hanging out at some bar in New York City drinking. The only problem is that he's only 20 years old so that's probably going to cause problems for the bar. Howard said that this kid and the woman who plays his sister on the show hang out like they're actually brother and sister. Artie took a look at the picture and thought the kid looked like Bluto Blutarski.
Howard said he got a few notes from Andy Bloom who suggested some bits that they should play before they leave. Andy wants them to play some classic bits from many years ago. Howard thought about bringing Andy on the show but he's not sure what he would do with him if he did come in.
Robin said she had a woman from the TV show ''Lost'' (the black woman) come up to her and say that she looked familiar to her and shook her hand. When Robin told her who she was, the woman yanked her hand away and walked away as fast as possible.
A caller told Howard he would like to hear the great bit where Hank the Dwarf was out on the street and popped out of a box. Howard said that was a great bit so he asked Gary to pull that and a bunch of the stuff that Andy Bloom asked for. The caller also asked Gary where he's going skiing over their Christmas holiday. Gary said that was none of his business because he doesn't want people following him around.
Howard said he was talking to a lawyer about the stuff they can and can't bring over to the new place when they leave. They can play bits that fans have sent in over the years but if they solicited for song parodies for a contest, they can't play them. He said he's learning a lot about the legalities of all of that stuff now.
Howard says his mother used to work there herself and she's the one who suggested that he go there but she ended up quitting as well. Howard got back to the caller, Timmy, who said that he doesn't hang out with other CP people. Howard figures that's because the guy is able to talk while other CP people are very hard to understand. Timmy told Howard he just wanted to congratulate him on his move. Howard interrupted him and said that maybe he should stop with the Timmy name and go by Tim or Timothy. Timmy said he would go by Timothy if that's what he wants.
Tim told Howard he wants to come down next Friday for the final show. Howard told him to come down and wondered if they could get one of the whores to get the guy laid. He asked him if he's ever gotten laid but Tim wouldn't give a direct answer, he was saying that he's done ''stuff'' but Howard figured he's never gotten any ''stank on his hang low.'' Tim laughed when he heard that. There are a lot of whores coming out from the Bunny Ranch and other places so they should be able to help this guy out.
Tim was afraid that he wouldn't be very safe there in the city. Howard told him that everyone will be in the same situation out on the streets so it's up to him. Howard said they could at least get him up to the studio to let him squeeze someone's boobs or something like that. Gary said he'd set the guy up to come in that day. Howard got back to the story he was telling about the CP Center. He said he just couldn't handle the pressure that day and had to walk out.
Gary and Howard were talking about last night's Survivor and how hot chicks get when they lose a lot of weight. Howard said the show is like a makeover show because of the weight loss thing. They spent a couple of minutes on that subject but Howard wanted to play some classic bits from the show. He had to take a break before getting to all of that but they did play the Roger Daltry ''Behind Blue Eyes'' song that Andy Bloom asked them to play as they were going to break.
Howard remembered back in the days of the L.A. riots getting a call from Bob about how they had people rioting right out in front of their building while Howard had callers yelling out the N-word. Howard remembered the Mark and Brian funeral they held out there in L.A. and how well Bob handled that.
Howard told Bob about the problems he's been having with Tom and the cart situation there. He said he knows that Bob wouldn't have given him the same problems because Bob knows how to handle stuff like that. Howard asked Bob how come he's so easy to get along with while Tom Chiusano isn't. Bob wasn't sure and said that Tom once called him and said that maybe he should come out there and take over for him. Mel Karmazin may have put a stop to that happening so that's why it never did.
Howard thanked Bob again for everything he's done for them and said it was sad that he couldn't be there next week. Bob said he has a couple of other commitments next Friday so he really can't make it. Bob told Howard that they were the first non-Infinity station to pick up his show so that was pretty amazing. Howard said he had to fight to get on that station and it wasn't easy to make it happen. They talked about how they had to get around the logistics of playing the show 3 hours late and all of that but it all worked out. Now everyone is syndicating around the country and not thinking twice about it.
Bob mentioned that Scott the Engineer used to complain to him behind the scenes at every event. He thanked Howard again and Howard told him that he hopes to work with him in the future, maybe at the same place he's going to be working at. Bob said you never know where you'll end up so that could happen.
Howard said that the whole thing with Tom and the carts was really annoying him but he's given up on it and is letting Tom and the company keep them. He doesn't get the nickel and dime stuff that the company is putting him through. They're treating him like some guy who just walked in off the street. Tom could have gone to Howard and talked about the carts but he chose to run off to the lawyer and talked to him instead.
Tom Chiusano came into the studio and said that he didn't run off to the lawyer the way he thinks he did. He said that was ''so not the case.'' Howard and Tom spent a very short time going back and forth before Howard went to commercial break.
It's snowing in New York City today so Gary said he's glad they're not doing the final show today. Howard said that Tom should let them go early today so they don't have to deal with the possible six inches of snow they have coming in.
Howard wanted to move on to play some classic bits. They were going to play some Stuttering John clips so Howard mentioned that some other people who used to be on the show will be on next week. KC is coming in on Monday and Jackie the Joke Man is going to be in on Thursday. Gary said he has a mystery guest lined up for Wednesday as well. He said that it's a guest that they've wanted for the past 20 years or so and it should make for a good final week.
Will Murray came in and told Howard that they're all set for the big revelation show that they wanted to do there. Howard said it won't be happening there, they're going to save it for the new place. Will said that everyone is in now, even JD has a story that he thinks is very good. Others that are in for the revelation show are Sal, Richard, Jason, Artie, Fred, Gary, Howard and Robin. Scott the Engineer backed out of the revelation show so Howard said that's why he's not really part of the show. He's an outsider who just comes on the show.
Gary thinks that Will should be part of the revelation show as well but Will said he didn't make the cut. Will is the one deciding if the stories are making the cut. Scott the Engineer came in and said he did have a story for the show but Will won't accept it. Howard talked to Scott about his weight gain and how he's fattened up a bit. They goofed on him about that for a short time before moving on to other stuff.
Howard took a phone call from a guy who mentioned the final show so Howard ended up talking about how Yahoo wanted to hook up a GPS tracking thing to him so they could track his movement on that final show. Howard said they should put the GPS on Gary the Retard and Wendy the Retard so they don't get lost. Gary the Retard has gotten lost in the city before and Benjy said he once got lost in his hotel room and couldn't open the door for them when they went to pick him up.
A caller asked Howard if he's going to put out a DVD for the last show. Howard said he doesn't have to do that because he'll be out on the street and he has his Howard Stern On Demand show to play video on.
Howard had some other Stuttering John moments to play. Richard Christy's favorite Stuttering John moment was when he interviewed James Lovell. Fred didn't have the clip ready to go so Howard had to play John's Walter Cronkite interview instead. Cronkite got upset with John for using the word ''frigging'' and told John that it was a ''bad word'' that shouldn't be used when doing an interview.
Will came in and told Howard why Stuttering John hated AJ so much. He said that John was kind of jealous of AJ for being able to sit in the Jackie seat after Jackie left the show. Will said that John wanted to sit in that seat himself and he may have been a little jealous of everyone who sat in Jackie's chair before Artie took over full time. Artie said he felt a little hostility from John himself even though they were very good friends.
A caller told Howard how the video of that AJ and Stuttering John fight was even better than the audio. Gary ended up taking most of the hit because he was between AJ and John at the time. Another caller brought up the second part of the Bill O'Reilly interview that aired last night. He liked that Howard brought up the crap that Bill sells to his fans. Howard said that Bill gives the money from the sales of that stuff to charity but he could be giving to charity himself instead of making his fans do it. He suggested to Bill that he give away the chachkies for free because that's what people used to do when they wanted to advertise their stuff on their products. Bill gave Howard one of his jackets but took it back when Howard said he was going to give it to a crack whore instead of wearing it himself.
Howard said he thought that Bill did an interesting interview with him and he enjoyed it. Tonight Bill is airing the third part of this interview he did with him. The caller Howard had on the line said he couldn't make it to the final show because he has surgery on Wednesday. Howard and the guys told him to blow off the surgery until the week after. He said that they've got a lot of chicks coming down that day and they'll be giving lap dances to the people in the crowd. He also suggested that guys be careful because there will be cameras on the crowd and if they don't want to end up on TV, they may want to disguise themselves.
Gary had another Stuttering John clip to play but Fred wasn't quite prepared again. He eventually played the clip where Stuttering John tried to get Billy Crystal to talk to him about Howard Stern. Billy said he was a fan of Howard's in that clip but in another interview Billy bad mouthed Howard. Fred was having problems because he didn't have his list of clips that he was supposed to play. They did the list about 2 or 3 weeks ago and now he didn't know where it was. Howard told Fred he has to give lists like that to Jason or Tracey (their new office manager) so they could keep track of it. Fred agreed with him on that. Howard had to take a break after that.
Howard said that Jeff once revealed that he wanted to be a rock star and they've shown picture of him in his spandex leotard on Howard's web site. Jeff even performed a song on the show one time and that's when they came up with the Jeff Leppard name for him. Howard played some of that performance and said Jeff really wasn't all that bad. Artie said he was much better than him. Howard was kind of surprised that day because Jeff is such a conservative guy.
Howard thanked Jeff for everything he's done for them because it's made working on the show much easier. Jeff shared a story with the guys about how he mentioned something to Howard one time about some company that was creating a computer that could simulate sex and Howard misinterpreted that and said that it was actually IBM that was doing it. That led to IBM getting tons of calls and the big wigs at the company calling him and asking him about this special machine he had talked about. Howard spent a little more time talking about his relationship with Jeff before getting back to the classic bits that he was retiring.
Howard played the Billy Crystal interview that they weren't able to find earlier. In the interview Stuttering John asks Billy some questions and Billy gets pissed and tells John that the interview wasn't fun. Howard thought that part of the interview had been chopped off. Fred found the bumper they play to see if it had the rest of the interview. That one had more of the interview than the interview cart had. Howard noticed that Billy never said ''It's not fun, it's not funny'' like they thought he did. It turns out it was actually a Billy Crystal imitator who said ''It's not funny, it's not fun.'' Howard said he was just learning that, he always thought it was the real Billy that said that line.
Gary gave Howard another clip where Stuttering John interviews astronaut James Lovell who ends up getting very upset with John when he asked him a question about being up in space with a homosexual and then a question about going to the bathroom in his space suit. He also asked him about masturbating in space which started to drive him over the edge. John continued with the dopey questions and Lovell eventually says ''I'm not laughin'' which is a classic clip that Fred has played for a long time. Howard thought it was someone else who said that line all these years. He thought it was Ted Williams for some reason.
Gary had Howard play another John interview where he interviewed Bruce Willis. Fred was having problems again so it took a few seconds to get the clip started. John asked Bruce about why he was avoiding Howard Stern and then interrupted another interview he was doing to ask him why he's so angry. John also asked Bruce if he would dump Demi when she got dumpy. Gary said he heard that Bruce was a ''c-hair'' away from punching John in the teeth during that interview.
A listener called in and said that he'll be in the city next Friday for the final show. That got Howard talking about his plans for the day and how it's going to be kind of like a convention for his fans. It'll be a great way for his fans to meet other fans.
Gary said that they may actually be able to bring some of the classic Stuttering John interviews with them because they used the WWOR equipment to record some of them when they were working on the Channel 9 show back in the early 90s. If the stuff was produced somewhere other than WXRK, they should be able to play it on the new show.
Howard also talked to Bill about all of the garbage he sells on his web site with his name all over it. Bill told Howard that he gives the proceeds from all of that to charity. That's when Howard tells Bill that maybe he should give his own money to charity instead of having his audience buy the crap and have their money go to the charity.
Howard said he did enjoy the interview with Bill and he had a good time. He also had a good time doing The Best Damn Sports Show interview. He said he told them that he has no knowledge of sports but he does talk about the personal lives of sports players because they're so interesting. He said he told the guys about some of the wacky stuff that they've done with sports guys on the show in the past.
Howard took a couple of phone calls and one guy asked Howard why he doesn't take more ''regular'' phone calls. He seems to think that Howard takes too many calls from the people who call in every day like Ralph and his other buddies.
Another caller brought up the Cindy Lauper performance of ''True Colors'' that she did on the show. Howard said that all came about after a friend of his saw her out in Central Park performing for a few people. Howard gave her a call and asked her to come in and do that for them. That led to Howard playing the song. He said that Artie probably thinks it's gay but he thought it was great. Artie said he actually likes that song and likes Cindy.
Doug Goodstein from In Demand called in and said he had a great time listening to that Stuttering John stuff. Most of it was recorded for the E! channel so it will live on on Howard Stern On Demand and Howard may be able to play it on his new radio show.
Howard played Stuttering John's interview with Bea Arthur where she said she used to be a fan but doesn't listen anymore. John also asked her which celebrity she'd like to nail most. Bea didn't have an answer for that question.
Ralph called in and told Howard that he was actually the one who saw Cindy out in the park playing for people. He thought that it was a waste and told Howard to have her on the show. Ralph also said that it's kind of sad that John left the show the way he did and left a sour taste in everyone's mouth. He also thought it was kind of lame that he didn't even call in or come in. Howard said it wasn't that John didn't want to come in, he just wasn't able to get there in person and he may not have wanted to call in because he probably felt he'd be attacked.
Howard and the guys spent a few minutes talking about John and the way Leno stole him away from the show. Howard said he's heard that Leno's people aren't happy with John now and don't give him any attention on the show. They make him pre-tape the intros and barely give him any air time. Howard is happy that John is getting paid the kind of money he's getting though.
Howard thinks that Leno and his people went about hiring John away by not telling him what they wanted. John was put in a strange position and he had to sneak around his back to make sure he didn't kill the deal. Howard said he would never kill the deal and he would have told John to go for it if he had asked him about it before taking the job. Howard thought it was time for John to move on but he should have handled it like a man.
Howard says that he acted like a man when he decided to leave the company. He says he told Joel Hollander that he was going to leave the company and he may move on to satellite. Joel wanted to talk to satellite companies for him but Howard didn't understand why he'd want to do that.
Howard said that he was approached by both satellite companies and they told him that they'd avoid hiring Opie and Anthony if he meant that they could have him. Howard claims that he would never do that to anyone and stop them from being hired because he's had that done to him in the past. Sal said that hiring Bubba the Love Sponge proves that. Howard talked about how people like Al Sykes from the FCC tried to keep him from getting jobs and he knows what it's like.
Howard was going to go to break but he had Drunken Artie on the phone. It was clips of Artie calling a radio show when he was really drunk one time so Howard had a conversation with him. Drunken Artie said he wasn't going to call in anymore but the real Artie said that people will hear a drunken Artie again in the future. Howard went to break after that.
Howard heard that Carl is now trying to get a law passed called the Duped Dads law which would protect guys who find out that they're not the real father of kids that they pay for. Howard said that Carl feels that he's one of these ''duped dads.'' Carl said that he believes that his ex-wife's child is actually Sam Kinison's because that's what his ex told him. Carl claims she said she was going to drop the child support requests but hasn't done so because she needs the money. The daughter is now 16 years old but he hasn't seen her since she was about 4. Now Carl believes that if the child is Sam Kinison's, she'd be entitled to the Kinison estate.
Howard said that it would probably be in the child's best interest to take a DNA test to find out if she's really Kinison's daughter. Carl said that he can't even post his comedy gigs on his web site because they try to garnish all of his wages when he does that. He wants to help the mother get the money she deserves from the Kinison estate if she's actually Sam's daughter. Carl said the mother of the child is not very cooperative and keeps his daughter from seeing him. He said the daughter did call him when he was at a gig and told him that her mother was telling her that Carl didn't love her. Carl said that's not the case, it's the mother who is telling her that stuff.
Howard said that it would be nice if the 16 year old could go and get a DNA test done but she'd need her mother's permission for something like that. Carl said that he would be willing to pay the money he owes if it turns out that it is his daughter.
Howard took a call from Sam Kinison (Craig Gass) who said he was sorry he never told Carl about sleeping with his ex-wife. He also apologized to Carl for making him deal with his kid. Howard let ''Sam'' go since his phone was cutting out.
Howard offered to have them do their DNA test right there on the air. Carl is willing to do that but they'd have to get the mother and daughter to agree to do it. They may also need Bill Kinison to agree to have his DNA tested to compare it to the girl's.
Howard gave Carl a plug for a couple of upcoming gigs. He'll be at the NY Improv on the 28th of this month and at Rascals in Montclair, NJ on the 30th and 31st. He's also got a DVD out called ''Live at the Frolic'' which is available at CarlLabove.com.
Howard and Carl spent a couple more minutes talking about the way some guys get screwed over when they have women lie about who the real father is. Howard said that he'd love to have him back to do the DNA test thing. Carl said that it's tough for him to fight this thing because he doesn't have the money to pay lawyers. He lives from month to month and can't afford to do it. Carl thanked Howard for all of the great years that he appeared on the show as Howard was wrapping up with him.
Howard read through some of the e-mail he's gotten lately. There was some feedback about the Tissue Time show and about the Bill O'Reilly interview Howard did. There were some people who gave Howard some advice for the final show. Some people don't want anyone drinking on the last show because it might ruin it.
Howard talked to Rocky a little more about her crack use and said it sounds like it hasn't ruined her life. She manages to keep her life together somehow. Gary told Howard that a single rock can go for $20 so she must be smoking like 10 a day. Richard Christy came in and asked Rocky if she hears someone like Crackhead Bob and worries that would happen to her. She said she wouldn't go out in public if she ended up like that.
Howard asked Rocky when she had her last John. She said it was probably on Tuesday. Richard said he understands that someone they know went out and partied with the girls after the show. Rocky said that they just dropped that person off and didn't party with him. She told Howard she wants to come down to hang with them on the final show next Friday. Howard said he'll introduce her to everyone that day but she said she'll be wearing sunglasses and a hat so no one will know who she is.
Beetlejuice told Howard that the song he created is going with him and management at the station isn't taking it from him. Howard was trying to tell him that the band Staind was going to perform it on the final day. Beetlejuice didn't seem to get that.
Howard gave Beetlejuice a plug for his web site JollyDwarf.com and a couple of plugs for people Beet wanted to thank, Attorney Robert Levant and Doc at Strangeland.com. Howard also quickly played one of his favorite moments from when Beet was on the show. In the clip Howard had Gary the Retard and Beetlejuice trying to spell some words. Howard asked Beet to spell ''RED'' about three times and he spelled it differently each time. In another clip Beetlejuice was vomiting in the bathroom and making some very odd noises as he was doing it.
Howard said that he was going to play a bunch of other great moments but he was out of time and maybe he'd play them on the final show instead. He asked Beetlejuice if he had any thoughts from the years he's been on the show. Beet didn't really have anything to say and he doesn't think that he'll be crying on the final show. Howard asked Beet if he knows his name. Beet knew that he was Howard Stern and that Robin was Robin.
Howard said that Beetlejuice is actually his father. Beet played along and said that when Howard was a baby, he looked just like him. Howard gave Beet another plug for his web site and started to wrap up with him. Fred was playing some clips of High Pitch Eric and Beet did something he's never done before, he imitated High Pitch Eric and goofed on him as if he were there in the studio with him. Beet was saying a few things that got the delay hit so Howard wrapped up and let him go. He'll be back next Friday for the final show.
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