A caller going by the name Nazareen made a threat to kill Senator Leiberman on the air with Howard. Howard told the guy that it's a bad idea to do that because the Secret Service will find out about it and come after him. He said that happened recently with the guy claiming to be killing animals in his neighborhood to get the affection of young kids. Howard said that guy turned out to be a fake and he was crying when the S.S. came after him. He gave Nazareen a chance to take back what he'd said but he continued to act like an idiot. Later in the show Gary came in and said that the S.S. called about 11 minutes after the guy got off the phone. They're coming down to get a tape of his call so they can track him down.
Howard spent a little while talking about the song parody contest they're having. Last week he announced the rules to the contest. He repeated the rules and played some more examples of the songs today. He also had a new one that he made up about Rudy from ''Survivor'' that was pretty funny.
Howard said that he spent some time hanging out with Jackie and Stuttering John over the weekend. They went out to Dominic Barbara's house in the Hamptons and drank 2 and a half cases of beer as well as a bunch of other alcoholic drinks. Howard said that John and Jackie can drink a lot of alcohol and it doesn't affect them. Howard's friend Matt from the New York Rangers was there also. Matt thought that Jackie and John were lightweights and that he could out drink them but the next morning he couldn't walk.
Howard said that they went to a restaurant one night and they saw the producer Gellman from Regis Philbin's show. They were thinking of sending a drink over to the guy but they decided against it. Howard didn't want to embarrass the guy or himself. Then a short time later the waitress came over to his table and says ''Mr. Gellman wants to buy you a drink.'' Howard then turned around and yells over to Gellman that it wasn't necessary and that he was going to buy him a drink. Gellman and his whole group of people looked at him like he was nuts. Howard said he saw Gellman mouth the words ''I didn't offer to buy him a drink'' to one of his friends. Howard then realized that Gellman didn't offer to buy him a drink. It turns out that Jackie told the waitress to tell him that so Howard would look like an idiot. Howard said he just laughed his ass off. He spoke to Gellman later and told him how he'd been set up. He said that Gellman told him that he's a big fan of his.
Howard said that Stuttering John has gotten really fat. He said they were playing pool over at Dominic's house and John's stomach was hanging over the table. He also said that at one point John told Scott Einziger that he's one of those ''fat skinny guys''. Howard said that John's got nerve saying that when he's a fat ass himself.
Last Thursday Colleen from ''Survivor'' called in and spoke to Howard for a while. That night Ralph came over to do some ''work'' for Howard. Ralph was telling Howard how he'd love to find a girl like Colleen because he wants to have a normal girlfriend or something like that. Ralph said she was probably doing Letterman that night so Howard told him he was going to do him a favor. Howard called Vinnie at CBS and asked him if Colleen was over there doing Letterman. Vinnie told him she was there and hooked him up with her. Howard told Colleen how good she was on the show and how cute she was. Then he told her that he wanted to have her talk to Ralph. He gave the phone to Ralph and let him talk to her alone for a while. She was really busy so she had to take his number and call him back. Ralph said that she was going to call him back later that night. After this all happened people were asking Howard if he was nuts for doing this to such a nice girl. Ralph has done some nasty chicks in the past and people are wondering why Howard would try to hook him up with this nice, sweet 23 year old. Ralph is still waiting for her to call him back.
Howard was talking about how Cindy Margolis will be on the show later this week. He still doesn't believe that she's the ''most downloaded woman'' on the internet like she claims. While he was talking about that he said that Gary made a phony phone call to her. Gary goofed on her by asking her if she'd be willing to do some really wacky things on the show. During the call he asked her if she'd do things like:
Howard took a few phone calls from people who had advice for him but it was all stuff he's heard before. One woman told him he wasn't drinking enough water. He said he drinks 5-7 16 oz. bottles of water every day. That's plenty he says. Howard eventually got tired of hearing all of the advice from everyone and moved on to other things.
Gary also got a quick interview with Paul Peterson who starred on the ''Donna Reed'' show. Paul is also a big defender of child stars. Gary broke Paul in with ''Who are you?'' and ''What made you famous?'' Paul wasn't too happy with those but after Gary asked him how many times he's been married and if he'd ever get married again he asked Gary where he was from. Gary told him he was doing the interview for Howard. Paul then told Gary to ask Howard how many child stars he's had on his show lately. Gary asked him one more question about who he'd sleep with, Ellen Degeneres or Whoopi Goldberg. Paul said ''I've had enough of you.. Turn it off..''
Finally Howard played one question from a Billy Gray interview that Gary did. Howard said the interview was really long so they just took the one question. Gary asked him ''Why are there so many Jews in the music business?'' Gray went on to say that there are so many because ''..they're overachievers..'' He continued on to say that you could ask why there are so many Jews in every other stereotypical job that they do and ''..where does it stop?'' Howard thought it was pretty funny to hear him saying that.
Howard said he was up late last night watching Cher on the Larry King show. He said that she hasn't aged very well but she doesn't really look that old because her skin has been pulled so tight. He wondered if he'd do her if he had the chance. Robin said he would do her just because she's Cher.
The song parody contest is in full swing and Howard has received a bunch of entries. He said most, if not all, of them are really bad. He played a little bit of one that wasn't that bad. It was about Tom Chiusano and the singer calls Tom a ''cheap Jew'' even though he's not Jewish. Howard thought it was pretty funny though. Howard said that the official rules can now be found on KRockRadio.com.
Howard ran across Monday Night Football last night while he was looking for ''Who Wants to be a Millionaire''. He said that Dennis Miller was worse than ever as an announcer. He played a few clips of Miller making references that hardly anyone could understand. They had to analyze each one for a couple of minutes to understand what the hell he was talking about. One of Howard's interns had written a letter about Miller saying that he didn't know he needed an encyclopedia and a masters degree to watch a football game. Stuttering John said that he's thinking of turning down the TV audio and turning on a radio broadcast of the game so he wouldn't have to listen to Miller's dopey comments.
Jackie was out at a Willie Nelson concert last night. He was out until midnight and his voice was shot this morning. Jackie said he smoked some weed with Willie on his infamous bus. Jackie said it was some pretty potent stuff.
Howard also asked about his financial situation. Erik had some problems after his divorce but he got work down in Mexico on TV show and made some money down there. Now he's got a couple of TV shows going on up here. He's working on ''American Adventurer'' where he travels around the world and he's also going to be the voice of some cartoon in the near future. Erik told Howard he'd be thrilled to come back to do ''Son of the Beach'' again also. He said he had a lot of fun doing it. Before Erik got off the phone Howard said that he heard that Erik carries around a piece of his son's umbilical cord. Erik said that it's actually the piece that dries up and falls off the belly button after a few days. He did keep it but he doesn't carry it around every day. He said it's not preserved in any way, it just kind of petrified itself.
Howard took a couple of phone calls to find out the audience reaction to it. One guy said that he sounded okay but when he performed against Tina Yothers recently he shouldn't have won. A woman called in and told Howard he sounded great. One guy wasn't happy that Howard was going with a Donovan song but everyone on the show thinks that's the one to go with. Gary told Howard that he shouldn't change the song too much because he actually sounded really good.
A short time after reading the article Gary came in and told Howard that they have Nazareen in custody. They got him 13 hours after he made the call at 6:20am yesterday morning. Howard replayed the phone call to let everyone hear the nutty caller. The Secret Service guy told Gary that it sets an example for people who think they can threaten public figures like that.
Because of this situation Anthony's wife left him. He said that she didn't agree with his decision to keep his daughter in the house. Howard wondered why she hasn't notified the police about this. Anthony said that she doesn't have any proof of what he's done.. other than the dead daughter sitting in her room. Anthony said she's encased in a polyurethane foam which looks very much like real skin. She's propped up in her bed with pillows around her. Anthony said that she watches TV to pass the time.
Howard had notes on this guy but Anthony kept telling Howard that his notes weren't accurate. Howard read that the guy sleeps with his dead daughter but Anthony said that she's not 18 yet so he doesn't do that. He said that when she turns 18 he's going to have a talk with her. He also said that as she ages he'll bring her to the taxidermist to have her ''enhanced'' for his pleasure. He also claims that he's in touch with his daughter telepathically.
The daughter had tourette's and a little bit of dwarfism. Anthony claims that she had a ''compassion'' for Hank the Dwarf who she still watches on Howard's E! show. Anthony told Howard that she was home-schooled because of her afflictions.
Howard also read that Anthony's wife caught him fondling the daughter one time. Anthony claims that he was just adjusting her bed linens and his wife mistook that for fondling. Howard took a couple of phone calls from people who think that this guy is really disturbed. The guy doesn't think there's anything wrong with what he's done. He even said he'd think about bringing her down to Howard's show. He claims that there is no law against what he's done. Howard thinks he's ''..wacked out of his head.''
Later in the show a guy claiming to be the taxidermist who preserved this girl called in. The guy claims that he knows this guy and what he's done with his daughter. He claims that the guy doesn't live in California, he lives in New Jersey. He even told Howard he knows that the girl weighs 128 pounds. He told Howard how he fills the body with different fluids that either make the body soft or firm and that Anthony made sure he kept the girls breasts and vagina soft. He also claims that he knows that this guy has had sex with the dead girl. Howard said that's only his opinion and that he doesn't know that for a fact. The guy said that he's done this procedure on 3 dead people. The girl was one and the other two were just people who's families wanted to keep their memories alive. Howard said that he'd like to have this guy come down when Anthony comes in with his dead daughter.
Dominic told Howard that his wife Irma told him that he should marry Howard because he's basically become his ''bitch''. Dominic told Howard that right after he got home from his trip to Los Angeles yesterday he went out shopping for a wide screen TV to hang on the wall of the bedroom Howard stayed in at the house. Howard had complained about how small the TV was in that room so Dominic decided to do something about it.. because he's Howard's bitch. Howard also suggested that Dominic hang some blinds in the bedroom because it was too bright when he woke up the next morning. He also told him to get a DVD player for the house.
While Dominic was on the phone he kept plugging this new TV show he's working on for FOX. ''Power of Attorney'' will be on sometime in the near future and Dominic is one of the attorneys. Howard wanted to know of the producers of the show asked that Dominic stay seated during the show because he's so fat. Dominic said that he gets to walk around and that he's lost some weight since Howard last saw him. Howard said that he hasn't seen Dominic in over a year.
Howard is looking for some hair gel that has been discontinued. He mentioned Sebastian High Contrast Hair Gel on the show yesterday and explained why this morning. He said that his hair people have been showing him how to use hair gel lately and he found that this Sebastian stuff is the best he's come across but they just discontinued it. He was able to find 7 tubes of it at one store but he wants even more of it. He told Gary to contact the company to see if he can get a case of it before it's all gone.
Bobo the Extreme Fan called in this morning and asked why the Saturday Night show wasn't on last weekend in the New York area. Howard said it wasn't on because there was a football game on earlier in the evening. He was informed by Vinnie Favale about it so that he wouldn't freak out. Apparently it wasn't canceled like some people were thinking.
Howard and The Losers rehearsed their version of ''Hurdy Gurdy Man'' after the show yesterday. Howard said they rehearsed it about 15 times. He had tape of their best version and it wasn't half bad. Howard used something to warble his voice in the song which was kind of odd but it didn't sound too bad. He said they're not good but they're better than Tim Russ' band. They'll be battling Tim's band this Friday in the second Battle of the Bands. The Losers beat Tina Yothers' band recently.
|Howard's Death Pool List|
|Rupert Murdock||Willie Stargell||Bob Newhart|
|Elizabeth Taylor||Morton Downey Jr.||Andy Rooney|
|Bob Hope||Ed Koch||Boris Yeltsin|
|Ronald Reagan||Gerald Ford||Soupy Sales|
|Buddy Ebsen||Pope John Paul||Harry Morgan|
|Burgess Meredith - (dead)||Senator Moynahan||Doris Day|
|Johnny Carson||Dom Deluise||Milton Berle|
|Katharine Hepburn||Peggy Lee||Charles Manson|
|Johnny Cash||Ray Walston||Papa John Phillips|
|Ted Williams||Gregory Peck||Jim Nabors|
|Robin's Death Pool List|
|Gene Wilder||Hugh Hefner||Zsa Zsa Gabor|
|Ted Williams||David Brinkley||Billy Graham|
|Robert Urich||Mike Tyson||Jan-Michael Vincent|
|Carlo Ponti||Sandra Dee||Marlon Brando|
|Dudley Moore||Joey Bishop||Jane Russell|
|Rue McClanahan||Kathie Lee Gifford||Lauren Bacall|
|Ed McMahon||Annette Funicello||Strom Thurmond|
|Phyllis Diller||Richard Pryor||Glenn Ford|
|Lady Bird Johnson||Christopher Reeve||Anthony Quinn|
|Dale Evans||Perry Como||Robert Schimmel|
Howard took a couple of phone calls about the subject. One guy said that they shouldn't fire him because they could use his big lips to raise the sunken Russian submarine.
KC came in and tried to get them to take some clothes off but they resisted the whole time. Gary offered them money and prizes but they refused. Howard told Demi that all he wanted was sex from her. He didn't want to go on a date. Demi told him that he'd only get sex on the honeymoon. Howard eventually had to move on so he let the girls go.
Howard took some phone calls for Elliott and most of them went off on him telling him how nutty he is. Elliott yells right back at them using rhyming words to describe them. It's something that's hard to describe here. You have to hear it to appreciate how nutty he sounds. One caller said that when he runs around his testicle hangs out of the thong. People see him running past restaurants in the city and it drives them nuts.
Howard was trying to end the segment but Elliott kept rambling on and on about everything. Howard and Robin both wanted to know what Elliott eats so that kept him in for another 10 minutes. He told Howard that for lunch he'll have 1 cup of brown rice, bock choy, snow peas and broccoli. That got Howard interested so he asked him about the rest of his diet. Elliott rambled on and on about all of the veggies that he eats and how he doesn't add any chemicals to his food because it will lead to colon cancer. The only thing he adds to his food is salt and pepper. As Elliott waddled out of the studio Robin said ''That walk just kills me..''
You can purchase Elliott's 39 page manuscript called ''Optimum Health'' by sending $10 plus $3 postage and handling to:
72-11 Austin St.
Forrest Hills, NY 11375
Somehow Howard got on the subject of what he can wear on the show because the E! guys have told him that he can't wear white. He ended up having a discussion with Scott DePace about it. Howard thinks it's an old TV rule that doesn't apply to today's TV cameras. Scott says that it's tough to balance the color when someone is wearing white. Howard also announced that Scott DePace's wife is pregnant so Scott's going to be a father. Gary said he welcomed Scott to the club yesterday when he heard the news. Gary let Scott know what it's going to be like after the kid is around for a while. Gary said that he yelled at his kids the other day like he's never yelled before. He just got fed up with his kids screaming while he was on the phone and he yelled at them. Howard also told Scott how his life is going to change like he can't imagine.
Crazy Cabbie called in this morning to tell Howard that he's going to New Zealand. Howard thought that he was part of the new ''Survivor'' or something. Cabbie says that he's going to be on some show called ''Cleopatra 2525'' so he's going down there to film it. He also let Howard know that he's taking Rebecca, the chick he broke up with on the show, down there with him. Howard just grunted when he heard that news. Cabbie claims that he hasn't had a drink in 13 days or so. He recently fell off the wagon and everyone was worried about him.. Okay, not everyone was worried.
Mark Protosevich, the writer of the new movie ''The Cell'', called in to talk to Howard for a short time. Yesterday Howard was talking about how cool the movie was after he'd seen a preview copy of it. Ralph had called in and given Howard some misinformation about the director's credits so Mark wanted to straighten it out. He said that director Tarsem Singh didn't direct any Nine Inch Nails videos. He did direct a couple of videos but not the four that Ralph was talking about. He said that Singh is big in the commercial directing though. Howard spent a few minutes talking to Mark about the movie and working with Jennifer Lopez. Mark said that Jennifer's boyfriend at the time, Sean ''Puffy'' Combs, was around on the set a little bit from what he remembers. Howard said that she did a good job in the movie as well as Vincent D'Onofrio who plays the villain in the movie.
Howard had tape of Craig Kilborn apologizing for something that was done on his show recently. Howard didn't understand how Kilborn could claim that the bit he was apologizing for was something that ''slipped through the cracks'' on the show. The bit was a caption under George W. Bush that said ''Snipers Wanted'' while he was giving a speech. Kilborn said that his show is ''almost live'' and that things sometimes slip through the cracks. He offered an apology to Bush and let his audience know that he was sorry for the whole thing.
Howard had a copy of the ''Survivor Soundtrack'' album that's coming out soon. It has the background music that was played on the show as well as the theme song from the CBS TV show. Howard played a little bit of it and it inspired him to start doing his Rudy impression.
Carnie was wearing jeans and heels but Howard told her she still dresses like a fat chick. She yelled at him for that and said that she can wear short skirts now. Howard suggested that she work out more to tone herself up. She said she's been working out on a treadmill and just got the Tae-Bo workout tapes. Carnie told Howard that she had an english muffin and an egg for breakfast. Howard thought that was enough to feed 4 people but she said it was only half of an english muffin. Howard was still amazed that she eats that much.
Howard heard that Carnie's sex drive is better than ever also. She said she and her husband Rob do it quite often. Howard told her that she's going to be really hot when she's thinned down even more. He told her that her face has always been pretty but now she's looking really good.
Carnie told Howard that her band Wilson Phillips is going to get back together and they even have a Greatest Hits album out.. even though they only put out 2 albums. She said there's some new stuff on it though. She also promoted the web site ADoctorInYourHouse.com where she gives updates on her progress every 2 weeks.
Howard wanted to know if when Carnie was fat if she was unable to see her vagina when she showered. She said that she couldn't see it but now she can. She said she was always clean though and now waxes her pubic area. She can even sing better now that she's got less fat pushing on her diaphragm. Howard also asked her if she was able to use a normal toilet when she was fat. Carnie said that was a ridiculous question and of course she was able to use a normal one.
Carnie told Howard that she's working on a book about her weight loss for Judith Regan. Howard said that if she's got naked pictures of herself when she was fat she should put them in the book. Carnie said that she has taken pictures of herself through this process and they're pretty scary. It sounds like she might be thinking about putting the pictures in the book. Howard took a couple of phone calls and wrapped things up with Carnie. He repeated his suggestions about working out to her. He also suggested that she not get pregnant for at least 5 years. She was talking 2 years or so but Howard said that would make her fat again.
Sean told Howard how their trip to the weekly tribal council was a one and a half hour walk through a 106 degree jungle that was really tough. He said there were huge hills to climb in the middle of the night and it wasn't easy. He's a doctor from Long Island and he wasn't used to that kind of stuff. Howard asked him why he didn't do something for Colleen when she had big open sores on her legs. He said there wasn't that much to do for her. The sores may have been related to her diet and the fact that she wasn't taking her vitamins. Besides, he's a Neurologist and open sores on someone's legs aren't his specialty.
Howard heard that Sean is a playboy who gets to bang a lot of hot chicks. He had an ex-girlfriend with him that was really hot. He claims that he never had sex with Jenna on the island but he is good friends with her. He told Howard that his sex drive dried up while he was on the island. He told him that he didn't even get morning wood while he was there. Sean said that the only one who's sex drive didn't seem to dry up was Richard the gay guy.
Howard asked Sean why he used the strange alphabetical voting strategy on the island. Sean said it wasn't that bad because it helped him last on the island longer than he may have otherwise. His vote would give others a clue as to who to vote for. He doesn't think it was that dumb of an idea. He also said that his decision to take Richard on the yacht the one night was another strategy he had to keep himself on the island.
Howard wanted to know what they used as toilet paper while on the island. Sean said that they used leaves when they really needed to but he didn't go all that much. He said he had only 3 or 4 movements total in the time he was on.
Howard was also curious about the claim they made on last night's show about how one of the torches would go out on it's own when they'd vote someone off. Sean said he didn't see anyone blowing out the torch but he's not into that superstition thing so he's not sure about it.
Sean told Howard that he's been getting a lot of fan mail from women. He said he gets naked pictures and offers from a lot of women. He says he won't act on it but he hasn't thrown out the letters either. Howard told him that he'd bang them in alphabetical order.
Sean told Howard how he quit his job shortly before finding out about the whole ''Survivor'' thing. He was disillusioned with the job he had so he quit. A few days later he saw an ad in Time magazine for the ''Survivor'' search and he applied. He ended up being one of the final 800 entries and eventually made it in as one of the 16 picked to survive. He said that when he got off the island he only weighed 152 pounds. He said he weighed 158 when he was in 8th grade. He's now back up to 180 pounds. Howard also had Sean's ex-girlfriend Christina come in to the studio. She was really good looking according to Gary. Howard spent a couple more minutes with the two of them and finally wrapped things up.
Howard is having second thoughts on his review of ''The Cell'' after reading a critic's review of the movie in the NY Post. The guy only gave it 2 stars and basically said it was horrible. Howard was raving about it the other day after he saw a preview of it. Robin told him that reviewers like that never give movies like that good reviews. Robin said she was sticking with her review of the movie ''Last Action Hero'' that she gave a few years back. She thought it was the greatest movie even though everyone else thought it sucked. She said she'll still sit and watch it if she runs across it on a movie channel. Howard thinks she's crazy.
Howard is thinking of posting all of the death pool lists on a web site sometime soon. It'll most likely turn up on KRockRadio.com.
Howard says that he did some research on his own and figured out why the Russian's didn't want any help in trying to save their sub from the bottom of the sea. Howard found that they probably had a missile test go wrong and it ended up blowing a hole in the sub. He also thinks that most, if not all, of the sailors were killed in the initial blast. If that were the case then the Russians wouldn't want anyone to know about it so they kept everyone away. Plus, it makes them look like fools if they blew up their own sub.
Howard spent a little while talking about how bad Al Gore was trying to change the way he speaks in last night's speech. He said that you can tell that he's being coached by someone to learn how to be more animated. It's not working very well according to Howard and he thinks they should just leave him alone and let him speak his own way. He thinks that Gore will be confused if people try to change him. Howard says that Gore ''..went from dull to dull and uncomfortable.''
Over the past year or so Howard has been unable to set his alarm clock to the radio station he wants. Instead, he's always awakened by a religious station that he's unable to change. He played tape of some of the stuff he hears when he wakes up. It's all songs about Jesus or a guy talking about the bible. Howard thinks it's sign or something.
Cindy has been called ''The most downloaded woman on the web'' for the past few years and Howard doesn't believe it. He spoke to her about that and told her that even the Guinness book of world records is now saying that Danni from Danni's Hard Drive is actually the most downloaded woman. Cindy told Howard that it's Yahoo and America Online that are calling her the most downloaded so it's not going to be explicit sites or women who are going to make the list. Cindy never poses nude, she's always in a bikini or something sexy. Howard was finally understanding what was going on there.
Howard had Mike Walker on the phone to play the Gossip Game this morning. He also told Cindy that she was playing for a listener today. If she wins then the listener would win $1000 courtesy of iWon.com. Each week Mike Walker, author of ''Malicious Intent'', calls in with four gossip stories. Three of the stories are from his National Enquirer gossip column. One of the stories is false. Everyone tries to pick out the false story. Here are this week's stories:
After the game Howard spoke to Cindy about her new TV show which starts this Saturday night. It'll be airing after Howard's show in many markets. Cindy said that it features a lot of hot women in sexy outfits. They play games and hang out in sexy places in sexy clothes. She said she'll be in all kinds of sexy outfits throughout the show.
Gary made a phony phone call to Cindy recently and in the call they asked her to do some wacky stuff. One of the things Gary asked her to do was sleep with Howard. She said she would do it. Today Howard said that Gary was unable to make the call to her for him to sleep with her because it was too awkward. Cindy told Howard that when she got married she and her husband made up lists of people they could sleep with and Howard was on her list. So she is still willing to have him come to her hotel and sleep with her. Howard said he really wants to do this and Cindy told him that he just has to come on her show. Howard doesn't want to do that but she convinced him that it's okay to come over to her hotel. Howard let Cindy plug her show and web site CindyMargolis.com. She gave him a kiss goodbye and Howard asked Gary if he got the info from Cindy. Gary said he got the address and phone number for her. Cindy even said she'd change her flight out of town just for Howard if he wants to come over. Howard knows that nothing will happen though. He predicts that she'll just want to have dinner because she's married.
After the break Howard came back and said that Steve told him that they shouldn't have gone first. They should have let the other band go first so they'd experience the technical difficulties. The Losers performed their unusual version of Donovan's ''Hurdy Gurdy Man''. They sounded about as good as they could possibly sound. Fred's guitar playing was better than you'd think and they didn't seem to have any problems. Howard was happy with the way it went off also. He took another break so that Tim's band could set up their equipment.
When they came back Howard took a couple of phone calls who said that Howard sounded surprisingly good. Howard then let Tim Russ and his supporting band, Neal Norman & His Cosmic Orchestra, perform ''Money Talks''.
It didn't sound too bad but Howard let the judges be the judge of that. Howard told them to judge this like they had to sign one of these two bands to their label (or play a video on MTV). Jason was the first one to tell Tim and the Cosmic Orchestra that he had to pick The Losers. He said that the Cosmic Orchestra made The Losers look young. He said that the Cosmic Orchestra looks like they could have been a ''..wedding band in the Truman era.'' Howard said that they should change their name to ''The Viagras''. Steve was up next. He complimented The Losers choice of outfits. He said that the Cosmic Orchestra had ''crazy outfits'' and said that they had a Liberace feel. He also picked The Losers as the winners. Finally, Tom Calderon from MTV went. He said that Tim's band sounded ''tight'' but the outfits were tough. He said that he had to go with The Losers mainly because of Fred's guitar playing. He said that it was amazing and it fits in with ''today's sound''. Tim thought that this was all rigged but Howard swears that it's not. He told Tim that Tina Yothers just called and wants to join him on the ledge. Tim wasn't affected by this judging though. He told Howard that he wants to have a rematch on the west coast with his own judges. Howard told him ''any time!''
Howard told Tim that he's spare him the embarrassment of wearing his Vulcan ears. Gary came in and told Howard that The Losers may be battling Doug Flutie's band in the near future so they have no time to rest. Howard says he's going to remake ''Jeepster'' for his next battle.
Before Tim left KC brought in some stuttering guy who wanted to complain to Tom about MTV not playing enough music videos. The guy came in but he stuttered and mumbled so much that it was too hard to understand what he was talking about. Tom told the guy that MTV plays just as much music as they ever have and they got rid of the guy. Howard spent a couple more minutes talking to Tim about Star Trek conventions and groupies before he ended the segment. You can find out more about Tim at TimRussWebPage.com
Howard said he heard that Bob and his wife are closer than ever now that he's dying. He said that's true and it's very tough for them because they lost their son to cancer. Bob told Howard that his wife was the one who noticed a lump under his arm that he didn't know about. He went in the next day to have it checked out and that's when he found out about the cancer. He said his doctor gave him a booklet called ''You and Your Cancer'' which advises you not to have sex because you are toxic after the chemotherapy. He also joked about the part that says you're supposed to avoid any oral/anal contact when you have open sores in your mouth. Bob said that he has trouble getting an ice cube in his mouth when he has sores in his mouth so there's no way he'd be doing any of that other stuff.
Bob said that he has some pain once in a while but over all he feels pretty good. He's lost 17 pounds since he started the chemotherapy and he's only on his third treatment out of 6. He had to have his bone marrow checked for cancer and that was really painful. He said they don't put you out for that and it hurts really bad.
Bob said that everyone keeps asking him if the doctors have offered him medical marijuana yet. Bob said that they don't do that for his type of cancer but his family and friends have asked about it. One of his friends bought him some so he smoked it. He said he got more stoned than he's ever gotten before. He was amazed at how powerful the stuff is these days.
Bob has a TV show deal with FOX and everything was going really well for him until this happened. He said he busted his ass for 20 years and then Bam! this hit him. Howard told him he could join The Losers because he really is a loser.
Bob said he was listening to Howard and Robin announcing their Death Pool lists the other day. He was glad that he didn't hear his name mentioned while he was listening. Then he got a call from his son-in-law saying that Robin had his name on the list. Jackie had it on his list but he ended up crossing it out. Howard said he would have put Bob on his list but he forgot that he had cancer while he was putting together his list.
This guy Iman from WNVE up in Rochester, NY called in and said that he'd be willing to be a bone marrow donor if Bob needs it. Bob was very thankful for that and Iman said he wasn't kidding. Bob told Howard he's 50 years old so if he does die Robin would get a full 50 points in the Death Pool.