Howard also told Robin about his Saturday night out with his youngest daughter and his mother. They went to see the play ''Beauty and the Beast''. Howard said he loved it. He loved the set and the story. He said he relates to the beast part of the story. That discussion eventually led into a discussion about how lawyers have ruined the institution of marriage. He was talking about how when people get married and then divorced the guys always lose half of their stuff because lawyers have made it that way. Howard said he doesn't know why anyone would want to get married knowing that if they get divorced they're going to lose half. A 23 year old listener called in and told Howard that he was thinking of popping the question to his girlfriend over the weekend but he held off and now he's glad he did. Howard gave him some advice and told him not to marry the girl and if she leaves him because he won't marry her then he should move on and find another one. The guy said that if he doesn't propose to her then she will probably leave him anyway.
Howard made a quick mention that the owner of the famous dog Air Bud has offered him one of Air Bud's puppies. Howard said he doesn't want to get another pet because he gets too attached to them. He pretty much lost his favorite dog Java when he separated from his wife and he doesn't want to lose another one.
Howard gave a quick review of the movie ''Being John Malkovich'' which he watched over the weekend. He said it was good and he enjoyed watching it.
Does Gary have Tourette's? That's what Benjy and Stuttering John theorized this morning. Benjy is the one who made the diagnosis. He says that Gary has a lot of ''ticks'' and other weird things he does. Benjy mentioned a bunch of weird things that Gary does like licking his teeth and playing with a piece of Scotch Tape while he's talking on the phone.
Of course Howard continued on and on about how great tonight's episode, ''Silence of the Clams'', is. He said it's his favorite out of all of them so far. Tune in to FX at 10:30pm to see it.
Howard then spoke to Deborah about her strange story. She claims that she started seeing colors around people as a young child and eventually saw ghosts. Now she's claiming that the ghosts of Grace Kelly and John Wayne are haunting Hollywood so they can get the movie ''Sixth Sense'' to win an Oscar award. Howard thinks she's nuts. Deborah had some weird story about how the ghosts want everyone to know about the other world or something like that. Howard was talking over her explanation so not all of it was heard.
Howard also asked Deborah how much she gets paid to do psychic readings. Deborah said that she works at some psychic center that charges $30 a half hour which isn't too bad compared to some psychic places. She also works on her own and charges $75 for an hour and 20 minute session. Howard let her plug her web site 3016.com. Howard wondered what the numbers meant. Jackie responded ''It's the number of times she's been wrong'' with her predictions. She said it has something to do with her birthday or something.
Howard heard that Leila was dating her manager but she denied that and said she's single. Howard asked her if she'd go out on a date with him. She said she'd do the date thing but wouldn't sleep with him. They later agreed to go out to dinner tonight.
Leila told Howard about how when she was only 2 years old her mother took her away from her father. She hasn't seen him since then. She said she doesn't have any desire to find him either.
Howard also discussed some of the upcoming episodes of ''Son of the Beach'' with Leila. Leila is featured in an upcoming episode but Howard picked ''Silence of the Clams'' as his favorite and she was a little offended by that. She agreed that it was one of the funniest ones but thought that he should pick her episode as his favorite if he likes her so much. Howard said she wears a thong in one episode.
Howard took a bunch of phone calls for Leila before she left. One of them was that Kotex woman who called in the other day saying that the show is disgusting. Howard let her vent for a minute but moved on pretty quick. There were a couple of guys calling in as Leila's dad also. One ''dad'' said that he should have molested her like Robin's dad did to her. There was this other guy who called in the other day who said that Leila's right breast is bigger than her left. Howard had argued with the guy telling him he was nuts. When he called in and asked Leila about it she said it was true. She said that her breasts are ''..like sisters, not twins..'' So keep your eyes on that right breast when you see the show. Howard was surprised to hear that news coming from her. Before Leila left she and Howard agreed to go out to dinner tonight. Hopefully we'll hear about that little date on tomorrow's show. Howard also said that Leila has a web site that will be coming out in about 2 weeks.. LeilaArcieri.com
Howard also took a bunch of phone calls from people who saw last night's episode of ''Son of the Beach''. They were all very happy with the show of course. One woman called in and asked why FX isn't on the cable system in New York City. Howard wasn't sure of the whole story but said it's got something to do with the FOX network and Time/Warner cable having a some kind of war but they'll eventually put it on. Howard says he didn't know when he signed on with FX that they weren't on in NYC but there's really nothing he can do about it.
Eventually Howard had Booker tell the story of how he found his girlfriend cheating on him. Booker explained how he uses America Online and how it keeps mail in a ''Personal Filing Cabinet'' if it's set up the right way. So he noticed that his girlfriend's account had some e-mails from a friend of his. He didn't think much of it and didn't read any of them right away. He asked her if she was in touch with this guy and she told him she wasn't. He waited until he got his phone bill and then found out she was also calling the guy. She still lied about it so Booker finally read the e-mails and discovered she was cheating on him. He told another story about finding her online one night after she'd moved out of his apartment and how he drove over to her house to see if she was with this guy. He kind of stalked her and waited out in his Jeep for them to come home. He saw the two of them together and that was it for their relationship.
Andy the intern came in and told a similar story about how he caught his girlfriend and his roommate cheating on him. He knew his roommate's password and used it to read some steamy e-mails between the roommate and his girlfriend. Howard said you really have to watch yourself with that AOL stuff.
Howard went on to talk about some of the chicks he met on Prodigy back a few years ago. He said a lot of them just lie about what they look like. He saw it first hand when he met some of the women he was having cyber sex with. He said he hasn't gone back since. Gary came in and said that the guys usually turn out to look like High Pitch Erik.. Erik just happened to be on the phone at the time so Howard spoke to him for a minute. Erik said he was in the Ebony and Ivory chat room on AOL last night for 7 hours or so. He says he's addicted to it. He's still a virgin though because when the women hear his voice they run for the hills. That led to Howard checking out Erik's AOL profile and personal home page. You can see a picture of him there also. Howard said the page read like a mental patient's page.
Before Booker got off the phone Howard talked to him about MTV and how much money he's making. Booker said he makes really good money doing what he does. He's a DJ on K-Rock in New York from 10pm to 2am and works on MTV doing a bunch of stuff. He also does some work for MTV 2 so he makes pretty good money. He didn't give exact figures but Howard and Gary figured it's probably around $250,000 a year. Booker just pretended not to hear them. He and Howard also discussed some of the hot bands that are out there now. Booker said that System of a Down is one hot one with their song ''Sugar''. Howard played a little bit of that but didn't sound too impressed with the song. Booker also said that Incubus is a hot one with ''Pardon Me''. Howard listened to a little bit of that and seemed to enjoy it. Howard ended up talking to Booker for an hour because the guy is pretty interesting. He finally ended it when Leila Arcieri called in.
Contestant number 1 is Julie. Julie and her sister Kim have been on the show before as lesbian sisters. Kim had implants and Julie was so impressed that she now wants her own. Contestant 2, Paula, is a 20 year old, 4 foot 6 and a half inch tall woman. Howard couldn't believe how short she was. He thought she was a midget but she said she's not. He said she looks like Tanya Harding with her legs cut off. Contestant number 3 is 28 year old Gabriella. She has very small breasts and Howard said he was rooting for her to win because the other two women really don't need the implants that bad. She also had a nice flat stomach and a nice ass according to Howard.
Howard got right into the game and here's how it went. Listed below are each round, the contestant's name and what came out on the wheel spin followed by the question and whether or not it was answered correctly.
Howard also played a phone message from a woman who was upset about him making fun of the Jeff Bridges CD on yesterday's show. The woman said that Howard's singing sucks also. Howard's not putting it on an album though.
Robin spent a couple of minutes telling Howard about how her TiVo failed to record ''Son of the Beach'' on Tuesday even though it was set up to do it. She also said there was a conflict between two shows and Robin doesn't know how the makes the decision between the shows.
Big Black called in with some tape of The Greaseman on ''Extra'' recently. He played it for Howard and ended up making some kind of dopey comment so Howard hung up on him.
Howard took a call from a guy who said that his brother just committed suicide over the weekend. He was a big fan of Howard's so the guy asked Howard if he'd send him an autographed picture that they could put with the body when it's cremated. Howard hesitated at first but then gave in and said he'd do it. The brother shot himself in the head so Howard said he'd give him a head shot photo that they could put in place of the guy's face. Then he said that they could give the guy the head of the Real Doll which is still hanging around the studio. The guy said he didn't really want the head though. Howard will be sending him something autographed other than the head of a dummy he had sex with.
Joe sounded like he was pretty pissed at the whole thing but Howard moved on to other things. Howard heard some things about Joe that are kind of disturbing so he spoke to him about them. Joe was put in a hospital for the criminally insane for 9 years. Joe told Howard about how he took the prosthetic leg of a man and lit it on fire. He said the guy owed him $50,000 and the only way he could get it out of him was to threaten him. He noticed the guy had a limp so he asked him what that was about. The guy told him he had a wooden leg so Joe told him to pull down his pants. He then told the guy to take the leg off and sent someone out to get some lighter fluid. He then lit it up. He also threatened the guy's wife by squirting lighter fluid in her hair. Joe said he got all but $500 of the money he was owed. The $500 was made up with jewelry and other various things.
Joe also spoke about some mob stuff while he was in. He told Howard that he thinks that John Gotti wasn't as high up in the mob as people think he was. If he was he wouldn't have gone to jail.
Joe also told Howard about some of the things that happened to him in the hospital he was in. He said he was given electro shock therapy and sometimes they'd hook the electrodes to his testicles or anus and laugh as they shocked him. He also saw 4 patients die in his presence. He said the guards and Doctors would beat patients to death and then tell the families that it was suicide.
Before Joe left Howard offered him a gift. He wanted to give him something in case he ever needs a favor done for him. Joe wanted a laptop computer but they didn't have any to give away. Gary ended up giving Joe a pair of Tag Heur watches. Joe told Howard that he really didn't have to treat him so well but Howard didn't mind.
Howard had Mr. Skin tell us about some other celebrities you wouldn't think would be nude in movies. Kathy Bates was one. Mr. Skin says she was in ''At Play in the Fields of the Lord'' and she does a full frontal nudity scene and it isn't pleasant. She's not a thin woman. An 83 year old Jessica Tandy did a nude scene in ''Camillia'' where she showed her back end. Gillian Anderson from ''X-Files'' did a nude scene in ''The Turning'' and showed her breasts. Mr. Skin said that one is hard to find. Molly Ringwald showed off her great breasts in ''Malicious'' according to Mr. Skin. He said he was surprised at how great her rack was.
Mr. Skin also does his own Oscar-type awards on his web site at this time of year. For best breasts he gave Diane Lane the award for real breasts and Shannon Elizabeth from ''American Pie'' got the award for phony breasts. He's not sure they're phony but said they look too perfect to be real.
Mr. Skin answered a few questions from various show member about some other celebrities. Courtney Cox did a sex scene where you can see her breasts in ''Blue Desert''. Rosie Perez shows her cans in ''White Men Can't Jump'' and Jennifer Lopes shows hers in ''Money Train''. Julia Roberts name popped up a couple of times but she's never done a really good scene where you can see her breasts. In ''Pretty Woman'' a body double was used so you don't actually see her breasts. One caller said that you can kind of see her real breasts in a sex scene but Mr. Skin said it's not worth checking out. Mr. Skin said that Keri Russell from ''Felicity'' did a wet t-shirt scene in ''8 Days a Week'' that's definitely worth checking out if you're a fan. Mr. Skin also said that Mimi Rogers in ''Full Body Massage'' is another great one to check out. She's nude through most of the movie and it's all gratuitous sex scenes.
Mr. Skin says that he thinks the top 3 actresses for a nude body of work would have to be Sharon Stone, Jennifer Jason Leigh and Demi Moore. Gary called in pretending to be a listener at one point and asked if Angie Everhart has ever done a nude scene. Howard wondered why he did that. Gary said he just wanted to know. Mr. Skin said that she did a nude scene in the sequel to ''9 ½ Weeks''. Howard's movie wife, Mary McCormack's name also came up but she hasn't done any nude scenes. Before getting off the phone he went through a few more celebrities who haven't done nude scenes but have done some sexy scenes. You can get all of this info at MrSkin.com
A listener called in and brought up Mr. Skin's appearance on the show yesterday. Howard said that he tried to get on the site last night around 8pm and he was still having a hard time pulling the site up. Everyone was checking it out after it was mentioned on the show. The caller asked about Teri Hatcher and what movies she's shown some skin in. Howard checked MrSkin.com and told the guy that some of the good movies included ''The Big Picture'', ''Heaven's Prisoners'' and ''Tomorrow Never Dies''.
A listener asked Howard about his old WWOR(Channel 9) TV shows and if they were available anywhere. Howard told him that they're not available now but if after CBS and Paramount merge he's able to get his hands on the tapes, he'd like to put some kind of compilation together. He said he's been trying to get the tapes from WWOR for years now but they won't give them up. He said he'd like to put a bunch of bits together and comment on them on the tape.
The subject of movies also came up. Howard was wondering what movies were coming out this weekend. That led to a discussion about some sucky movies. ''Erin Brockovich'' was brought up and Robin said it was a good TV movie but not good for the theaters. Same went for ''Cider House Rules'' which Robin didn't really care for. This discussion eventually led to Howard making a few Oscar picks. Originally they were going to bet on them but Howard changed his mind and just made a few picks. For Best Picture Howard picked ''American Beauty'' not because he likes it but because he just thinks that will be picked. He'd pick ''The Sixth Sense'' over ''American Beauty''. For Best Actor Howard picked Kevin Spacey. For Best Actress he picked Annette Bening. For Best Supporting Actor he picked Tom Cruise. Howard didn't really know who to pick for Best Supporting Actress so he just went with Chloe Sevigny.
The teams were Howard with Fred, Jackie with Robin and Gary with Stuttering John. The first round was Howard, Jackie and Stuttering John. Their partners were sent out of the studio so they couldn't hear the answers that were given. Here are the first 3 questions and the answers the guys gave:
What is the one thing your partner has kept hidden as long as they could?
If your partner could invite anyone, living or dead, to dinner, who would it be?
Who's family has more skeletons in their closet, yours or theirs?
After taking a break the partners returned to answer the same questions. Here are the answers and whether or not they were correct:
What is the one thing your partner has kept hidden as long as they could?
If your partner could invite anyone, living or dead, to dinner, who would it be?
Who's family has more skeletons in their closet, yours or theirs?
Gary and John took the game by getting that last question correct. They were playing for points and the last question was worth 25 so if Gary and John had gotten it incorrect then Howard and Fred would have won. Robin says that the questions were no good and that they just sucked. Sore loser.
Dustin's salary came up and Howard guessed that he was making about $12,500 an episode. Dustin told Howard that he started out at age 11 making $2500 an episode and eventually worked his way up to $13,500 by the end of the run. Not too bad for a 23 year old. The show was finally brought to an end last November so now Dustin has started in stand-up comedy. Before they got into all of that Howard got Mike Walker on the phone to play the gossip game.
Howard spent a few minutes talking to Mike about this article in the Wall Street Journal where they polled a bunch of the people who vote for the Academy Awards. They printed their results and they should be pretty accurate for the winners of the awards. The Academy is pissed because it ruins the suspense though. Howard read off who the winners should be. Here's what he read:
After the game Howard spent more time talking to Dustin. He had some notes on him that said he knew karate. Dustin told Howard that he learned it from his father at an early age. He actually got to use it one time to defend himself. He'd taken a fan of his to Disneyland for her birthday. He was about 14 at the time. Some guy was taunting him on the Pirates of the Caribbean ride and waited for him at the end of the ride. Dustin said he threw the guy against the wall and ended up going to Mickey Mouse Jail to wait for the cops to show up.
Howard also heard that Dustin has a hard time getting laid even though he's fairly famous. Dustin said that's true but he has had some conquests that he's proud of. He said he first had sex at 15 and he got a lot of the extras on the set of ''Saved by the Bell''. He tried getting some of his co-stars but it never happened for him. He did get a Russian model at one tome though so he did pretty well there.
Dustin is now doing stand-up comedy with his partner Bob Golub. Howard had Bob come in so they could talk to him also. Bob has been on the show in the past. He wanted to fight Dice Clay at one point. He's now teamed up with Dustin and they go around touring comedy clubs. They'll be at Rascals comedy club in West Orange, NJ tonight at Rascals by the shore tomorrow. You can find out more at Rascals.net.
Dustin's money situation came up once again and this time it led to a really long discussion. Dustin told Howard how he doesn't have all of the money he made from ''Saved by the Bell'' because his parents seem to have spent most of it. He said his mother is dead now but his father is still living with him and Dustin is supporting him. He said that he got about 25% of the money because of the Jackie Coogan law which guarantees him a certain amount of money from acting as a child. The other 75% is gone though. Dustin told Howard that he wants to kick his dad out of his home. Howard volunteered to do it for him so Dustin gave him the number. Gary got the guy on the phone and Howard went on to talk to the guy for at least a half hour. Howard discussed the situation with Dustin's father Mark and basically found out nothing. Dustin wonders where all of that money went but Dad didn't really have an answer. Mark said that he gave up his career as a teacher to shuttle Dustin around to his acting job so the money Dustin was making was supporting the family. Howard kept asking the guy why he would give up a career to do that but he didn't have a good answer. He seemed to be using that as the excuse for spending the money. They went over the same stuff over and over again but nothing was settled. Dustin still wonders where his money is and Dad doesn't have an answer. Howard eventually told Mark that Dustin wants him to move out. Mark says that he's trying to get back into his field of work but it's hard. He's got health problems and it's tough to get started again. Dustin said he doesn't really want to throw his dad out on the street but he does want him to move out. He's not paying rent and Dustin is sick of it. Mark told Howard that he felt that he was being attacked from the beginning of the call and he never got his chance to talk. They gave him plenty of chances though. Howard thinks there's a book that could be written about this whole situation and said he'd talk to Judith Regan about putting something together. Howard said there's a bigger story there than they can imagine.